IT hath been much upon my mind (especially of late) to write something by way of journal, of my life, travels, and experience in the gracious and merciful dealings of the Lord with me, through the course of my pilgrimage in this world; to­gether with some remarks on the state of our society in my time, interspersed with divers observations relating to our conduct, in various stations of life, but chiefly in a religious sense; to remain, when my body is laid in the dust, a lasting memorial and testimony to the truth. And as the Lord shall be pleased to open my understanding, I may also afford profitable way-marks to some weary travellers, who are seeking a [Page 2] city that hath foundations, whose builder and maker is God.

I was born on the 21st day of the 5th month, 1713, in Radnorshire, South Wales; being favoured with parents who had the substance of religion in themselves, and were conscientiously concerned to train up their children in the fear of God. The names of my parents were John and Amy Griffith; my mother (as I re­member) was educated in society with the people called Quakers, and a steady valua­ble friend she was; having at times, a few words, by way of testimony, tenderly to drop in religious meetings, which were accept­able to friends. My father, as I have heard him relate, was convinced of the blessed truth after he had arived to man's estate, and found it a great cross to join in society with the despised Quakers; he being the only one of the family, which was pretty large, that joined in society with that peo­ple. But the Lord making hard things easy to him, he gave up, in earnest, to the heavenly discoveries, and, in process of time, had a dispensation of the gospel of peace and salvation committed to him; wherein he laboured, in the parts where he lived, with remarkable sincerity and up­rightness; being indeed a truly living mi­nister, and an heavenly-minded man, as I well remember, though I left him when I was young, and never saw him again. He [Page 3] finished his course in this world, on the 24th of the 2d month, in the year 1745; it is added in the register of the monthly-meeting to which he belonged, thus, viz. ‘He was a minister many years, and left a good report behind him among all sorts of people.’ He was a serviceable instrument in the Lord's hand against undue liberties, which were then creeping in; and was very deeply affected with the declining state of the church in those parts (many having remo­ved to America) which since his decease are become almost a desolation.

Having thus paid a small tribute, which I thought due, to the memory of my worthy parents, I shall proceed to give an account of my self.

I was favoured with the heart-melting visitations of God's love, I think, when about seven or eight years old; and fre­quently experienced his name to be in the assemblies of his people as precious oint­ment poured forth; whereby my desires were greatly raised to attend meetings for divine worship. For although, like Samuel of old, I was as yet unacquainted with the voice of God, neither did I clearly under­stand from whence that precious consola­tion, which I felt, came; yet, I well re­member something working powerfully in my tender weak mind, by way of opposition to that sweet heavenly enjoyment, in order to deprive me thereof, by presenting to my [Page 4] view some transitory delight, and by filling my mind with vain unprofitable, and some­times wicked and blasphemous thoughts, which were a very great affliction to me. Then he, who was a liar from the begin­ning, would suggest to my weak mind, that the only way to get over such uneasiness, was to give way to those thoughts, and to be utterly regardless of what passed through my mind. I found the flesh wanted ease, and to save its self; willingly joined here­in with the temptations of Santan, whereby I got a kind of present ease, but it was by such gratifications as tended to heap up wrath against the day of wrath, and the re­velation of the righteous judgments of God. So that, notwithstanding the false ease con­trived by my soul's enemy, I did, at times, very sensibly feel, as I grew up, this peace disturbed and broken by a sense of God's wrath, revealed from heaven against my un­righteousness; and great bitterness of spirit I was often in, when the chastening of the Lord was upon me for sin. I would, at such times, enter into covenant with the Lord, promising amendment; but as those promises were made much in my own will, they were soon broken, and that would in­crease the weight of my horror and dis­tress: the Lord, in infinite mercy, being pleased to find me out, and to plead with me as in the valley of decision. In wri­ting this, my mind is greatly moved with [Page 5] pity and bowels of compassion towards inconsiderate youth; who for the sake of tristing vanities, slighting their own mer­cies, are subjected to distress of mind: and the case is still worse, when by repeated dis­obedience and rebellion against God's un­merited grace, they have almost stifled his divine witness in their own hearts, and go on with impunity; for an awakening time will come, soon or late, which must strike all such with horror and amaze­ment. May it be in mercy!

My godly parents were very careful to pre­vent my falling into evil company; notwith­standing which, I frequently, without their knowledge, found such, and joined them in those vanities which are incident to youth; and perhaps was not a whit behind any of them therein: yet in the cool of the day, I was sharply reproved for the same; nay sometimes, in the very midst of my folly. But by this time I wanted to silence that pure witness against evil in my heart. Oh! I have often since, with deep reverence, thankfully admired the long-suffering of a gracious God, in that he did not cut me off, when I wilfully resisted the reproof of his instruction, which is the way to life, because I wanted my living in the vain plea­sures of this perishing world.

When I was about the age of thirteen years, a friend who had lived some time in Pennsylvania, being in our parts, and fre­quently [Page 6] at our house, gave a very pleasing account of that country. I having two uncles and one aunt there, some of whom had before written to encourage our going over thither, my inclination grew very strong to go; though my parents, especially my father, was at first very much against it. But I was as one immoveably bent for going; which when my parents saw, and that an elder brother inclined to go with me, they at length consented thereunto, and procured a certificate of our being in unity with Friends. There being a family of Friends, out of the compass of our month­ly meeting, also going over in the same ship, we were delivered under their care, and in the year 1726, we embarked at Mil­ford-Haven, on board the Constantine gal­ley of Bristol, Edward Foy master. We had a passage of about eight weeks from land to land. Wc were about eighty or ninety passengers, generally healthy, a­mongst whom three children were born whilst on board, and none removed by death. My uncle, John Morgan, who lived about 12 miles from the city of Phi­ladelphia, hearing of our arrival, came on board, and conducted us to his own house, where I continued for some time, my bro­ther, being a weaver, settled at my aunt Mary [...], following his trade.

Removing from under my parents watch­ful care over me, for my good, furnished me with great opportunity to gratify a vain [Page 7] mind, in the foolish amusements of a tran­sitory world, towards which I had but too great an inclination. But I have this to say, in order that parents may be encoura­ged to exert their godly endeavours for the preservation of their children, that I do stedfastly believe, the religious care of my parents over me in my youth, impressed so great an awe upon my mind, that, through the blessing of Divine Providence, it was a great means of my preservation from gross enormities; though I had great op­portunity of being plunged thereinto, after I left them. I hope ever to retain a grate­ful and thankful remembrance of those gracious preservations, when I consider, how narrowly I have escaped those rocks, upon which many have been shipwrecked and ruined.

I was sometimes visited, and in degree awakened to a sense of my undone con­dition without a Saviour, after my arrival in American, though not so frequently as when I was younger. As I had often, oh very often! knowingly withstood it, my taste for worldly pleasures being now grown stronger, I was very unwilling to give up to the call of Christ. I could plead abund­ance of excuses, concluding among other things, that I was but young, and might live a great many years; that if I did take my swing a few years, I might become re­ligious sooner than many others had done, [Page 8] who were brave men in their day. I would, however, to make myself the more easy for that time, fully determine to be a very re­ligious good man, at one time or other; but it must not be yet. Thus, through the gross darkness which had covered my mind, I who had no certainty of seeing the light of one day more, was prevailed upon, by the subtilty of Satan, to run the dread­ful hazard of a future repentance and amendment of life, and so became worse and more hardened in evil, though shall preserved out of gross pollutions, or what are commonly so esteemed; I was afraid to tell a lie, except to embellish, or set off a pleasant or merry tale or story; appre­hending it no great crime to tell a lie in jest. I never remember to have sworn an oath, or uttered a curse in my life. Nor was I ever prevailed upon, in my custo­mary conversation, to depart from the rules of my education, respecting the plain lan­guage, thee and thou to one, and you to more than one; all this time preserving a pretty fair character amongst men, as none could charge me with any thing accounted scandalous. I retained much love and re­gard for those I thought truly religious; especially weighty substantial ministers of the everlasting gospel; and I believe had a better sense of their spirits and labours, than some of my companions had, and therefore was afraid to despise or speak contempti­bly [Page 9] of such, as some of my associates did. In this carnal degenerate state, I did com­monly, in a customary way, attend first-day meetings, and mostly had the liberty of going on other days of the week, when any ministers from distant parts came to visit Abington meeting, to which I belong­ed: but alas! it was to little or no good purpose, as the labour bestowed upon me, by ministry or otherwise, was like water spilt upon a stone, that soon runs off again with­out any entrance; I being indeed for some time, like the heath in the desart, not knowing when good came: and if at any time, the seed of God's kingdom fell upon my heart, which was like the high-way ground, it was soon taken away, and I presently lost the savour thereof.

When I had arrived to upwards of nine­teen years of age, I was, through infinite mercy never to be forgotten, visited in an ex­traordinary manner; concerning which, as it was the happy means of turning my mind, in a good degree, from the perishing vanities of an uncertain world, to the God of all sure mercies, I intend to be some­what particular. One evening, being with divers of my companions in vanity, and under no restraint, as the heads of the fa­mily were not at home, we carried our frothy vain conversation, and foolish rude actions, to a higher degree of wicked mad­ness, than I ever was guilty of before, in [Page 10] which I suppose I was as a ringleader. On this account, I felt some sharp lashes of conscience as I went to bed that night; and a thoughtfulness took hold of my mind, that we had not a being in this world for such a purpose, or to spend our time as above mentioned, of which I gave some hint to my bed-fellow; yet this conviction did not sink so deep, but that I pretty soon got to sleep. I had not slept long, before a messenger alarmed me with an account, that one of my jolly companions, who was then in the house, and who, I think, had been the best of us, was dying, desiring me to go immediately to him, which I did. I was exceedingly struck with horror of mind, at the thoughts of the manner in which we had spent the evening before, and the sudden stroke that followed upon this poor man. But when I came to his bedside, and saw the dreadful agony he was in, my horror was increased beyond all expression; as none of us expected he could live many hours. For my part, I was so deeply plunged into anxiety of mind, that it seemed as if the pains and terrors of hell had laid hold of me already; and I was then in full expectation there was no deliverance for me therefrom; but that I should die, with the weight of that distress which was upon me, before morning. This happened on a seventh-day night, and though the young man in time recovered, yet he was [Page 11] not fit to be left next day, which hindered me from going to meeting, to which I was exceedingly desirous to have gone; for by this time I was pretty thoroughly awa­kened to a sense of duty; and it being a week before the like opportunity presented to me again, it seemed the longest week I had ever known. Oh, how did I long to present myself before the Lord in the assemblies of his people! that I might pour forth my in­ward cries before him, in a state of sincere repentance, and deep contrition of soul; which, through the effectual operation of his power in my heart, I was then in a condition to do. Now I clearly saw, that repentance is the gift of God, and that his love, wherewith he hath loved us in Christ Jesus our Lord, leads sinners thereinto. The fleshly will being, for the present, overcome and silenced, there was a giving up, with all readiness of mind, to the Lord's requirings. There was not any thing then too near to part with for the real and substantial enjoyment of the beloved of my soul; for I was brought in degree to expe­rience, that he came ‘for judgment into this world, that they which see not might see; and that they which see might be made blind.’ I could no longer look upon my former delights with any satisfaction, but instead thereof, had a glorious view of the beauti­ful situation of mount Sion, and my face was turned thitherward, and for the joy which [Page 12] was set before me, I was made willing to en­dure ‘the cross of Christ, and to despise the shame;’ and though I became a wonder and a gazing stock to my former companions, I did not much regard it, knowing I had just cause so to be. My great change struck them with some awe, for I observed they had not the boldness to mock or deride me before my face.

The young man, who was an instrument in the divine hand for my awakening, and his brother, were both greatly reached and deeply affected, for the present, by the above-mentioned wonderful visitation, and there was a very visible change in them for a time; but, like the seed that fell on the stony ground, they withered away, and did not become fruitful to God.

I greatly rejoiced when first day came, that I might go to meeting; which proved to me indeed a memorable one, there being two public friends, strangers, sent thither, as I thought, on my account; for most of what they had to deliver, appeared to me applicable to my state. Now did I, in some degree, experience the substance of what was intended, by the ‘baptism of water unto repentance; the washing of water by the word; and being born of water and the spirit.’ All which would be fully seen, and clearly understood, by the professors of Chris­tianity, were they rightly acquainted with the ‘gospel of Christ; which is the power of God [Page 13] unto salvation.’ This power, inwardly re­vealed, is alone able to work that change in them, without which, our Lord saith none shall so much as see the kingdom of God. But alas! being carnal in their minds, a spiri­tual religion doth not suit them; for, as saith the scripture, ‘the natural man receiveth not the things of the spirit of God, for they are foolishness unto him; neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discern­ed.’ Hence it is, that the professors of the Christian name, retain signs and shadows, whilst the substance is neglected; pleading for the continuance of types, when the antitype is but little regarded: where this latter is ex­perienced, all shadows and types vanish and come to an end; as did the legal types, when Christ, the antitype, came, and intro­duced his dispensation, which is altogether of a spiritual nature. And, what is yet more wonderful, and an evidence of great ignorance, is, to find those happy and blessed effects, which are only produced by the bap­tism of Christ with the Holy Ghost, attribut­ed or annexed to the ceremonies of sprinkling a little water by a priest in a child's face: for, when that is done, the priest prays, 'that old Adam in the child may be bu­ried; that the new man may be raised up in him; that all carnal affection may die in him; and that all things belonging to the spirit may live and grow in him.' Then he prays, that the element of water may be [Page 14] sanctified to the washing away sin. The child is then said to be received into the congregation of Christ's flock, and signed with the sign of the cross: when this is done, they acknowledge the child to be regenerate, and grafted into the body of Christ's church, and return thanks to God, in that he hath been pleased to regenerate that infant with his Holy Spirit, and to receive him for his own by adoption: Concerning a child sprinkled, they say, 'who being born in original sin, and the wrath of God, is now, by the laver of re­generation in baptism, received into the number of the children of God, and heirs of everlasting life.' They say, by baptism, viz. sprinkling infants, that they have put on Christ, and that they are made chil­dren of God and of the light. They hold children baptized, dying before they com­mit actual sin, are undoubtedly saved; which seemeth to imply, others are not. Being now weary of reciting these palpable errors, I shall proceed with the account of my own progress, in the real experience of this great work of regeneration, or the new birth, which, I well know, is not ob­tained at so easy a rate as above-mentioned.

This administration of water by the word continued in a remarkable manner upon me, for about three months, in which I found great satisfaction, as it was accompained with an heavenly sweetness, like healing [Page 15] balsam upon my wounded spirit; my heart being melted before the Lord, as wax is melted before the fire. Great was my de­light in reading the holy scriptures, and other good books; being favoured, at that time, to receive much comfort and im­provement thereby. But this easy melting dispensation, was to give way to a more powerful one, that the floor might be tho­roughly purged, even the baptism with the Holy Ghost and fire: for the former dis­pensation of the Lord to my soul seemed much to resemble John's baptism with water unto repentance, as being the real thing signified thereby, in order to prepare the way of the Lord.

Under this dispensation I was for a time exceedingly distressed, in a sense of the great alteration I found in the state of my mind; attributing it to some cause given by me, that I was thus, as I thought, forsaken. All the former tenderness was gone, and I was as the parched ground. My agonies were so great, that when it was day I wished for night; and when it was night I wished for day. In meetings for worship, where I had enjoyed most satisfaction, I now was under the greatest weight of pain and distress, even to that degree, at times, that I could scarcely forbear crying aloud for mere agony. When meeting was over, I would sometimes walk a considerable way into the woods, that unheard by any mor­tal, [Page 16] I might, in mournful accents, give vent to my greatly distressed soul. In this doleful state of mind, the grand adversary was permitted to pour forth floods of temp­tations. I was almost constantly beset with evil thoughts, which exceedingly grieved me; for though I was in such a dark dis­tressed condition, my mind was, by this time, too much enlightened to allow of, or join with, wicked and corrupt thoughts: yet I often judged myself, and I believe at times not without cause, being apprehen­sive, I was not earnest enough in resisting those evil thoughts and temptations. But, oh! I was exceeding weak in those days; and I am persuaded the Lord, in gracious condescension, looked mercifully at the sin­cerity of my intention, not marking all my failings, or I could not have stood before him in any degree of acceptance. Very great were my temptations, and deep my distress of mind for about a year; in which time I was but as a little child in under­standing the way and work of God upon me, for my redemption. Yet, he who will not break the bruised reed, nor quench the smoaking flax, until he sends forth judgment unto victory, by his invisible power, bore up my head above the rage­ing waves of temptation, so that the enemy found he could not overwhelm me there­with: the Lord teaching my hands to war, and my fingers to fight under his banner, [Page 17] through whose blessing and assistance, I found some degree of victory over the beast, viz. that part which hath its life in fleshly gratifications. Then began the false pro­phet to work with signs and lying won­ders, in order to deceive my weak and un­skilful understanding; as it is written, 'Satan is transformed into an angel of light:' so I found him, at least in appearance. He that goes about seeking whom he may de­vour, perceiving I was too much enlighten­ed from above, to be easily drawn into sen­suality, craftily attempted my destruction another way, viz. by setting himself up, undiscovered then by me, for a guide in the way of mortification, which I was then re­solved, through divine assistance, to walk carefully in, by denying myself in all things which appeared inconsistent with the di­vine will. This subtil transformer, tak­ing advantage of the ardency of my mind to press forward in this necessary concern, suggested that my work would be much easier in obtaining a complete victory over evil, were I to refrain for a time from some of the necessaries of life, particularly from eating, and taking my natural rest in sleep, except just as much as would preserve life; and that I must constantly keep my hands employed in business, as idleness is the nursery of vice; neither was he want­ing to bring scripture, and passages out of other religious books, to confirm these re­quirings. [Page 18] I then really believed it was the voice of Christ in my mind commanding these things, and therefore endeavoured to be faithful therein, till my natural strength abated, and I found my body grew much weaker thereby. Greatly distressed I was, when at any time I fell short of what I apprehended to be my duty in these respects, he that required this service being a hard master; though he had power to deceive, yet he could not give me faith that I should overcome. My views in those days were indeed very discouraging, my poor afflicted soul being almost sunk into despair. My friends took notice that I was in uncommon distress. The family in which I then lived, as they could not be altogether ig­norant, though I concealed it as much as I could, of my wandering about in the fields, &c. at nights, and much refraining from food (my deep distress being also very legibly imprinted on my countenance) feared, as I afterwards understood, lest I should be tempted to lay violent hands on myself. I was forbid in myself to tell my condition to any, as that would be seek­ing relief from without; a very improper and unworthy thing.

Notwithstanding which, the God of all grace, who permitted this uncommon af­fliction to fall upon me for a trial, and not for my destruction, was pleased, in wonder­ful kindness, to move upon the heart of a [Page 19] minister belonging to our meeting, to visit me, and to open a way for my deliverance. He strictly inquired concerning my inward condition, informing me that friends were much concerned about me, as it was very obvious I was under some uncommon tempt­ation. I was at first very unwilling to open my state to him, however he at length pre­vailed, and took the opportunity to shew me that I was under a gross delusion of Satan. Being thus, through the Lord's mercy, delivered from the wicked design of mine enemy, which undoubtedly was to destroy both soul and body, I had, in reverent thankfulness, to rejoice in his salvation. I then clearly saw, that Satan in his religious appearance, was also carefully to be guarded against; as nothing in religion can be accept­able to God, but the genuine product of his unerring spirit, distinctly heard and understood by the ear of the soul, and the renewed understanding. "My sheep," said Christ, "hear my voice;" which I now began to experience fulfilled; blessed be the Lord for ever! I had many precious openings into the divine mysteries about this time; and when I read the holy scriptures, they were opened to my understanding, far beyond whatever they had been before, so that I had very great comfort; my hope being re­vived, and my faith much strengthened, by those things that were written aforetime. I am well assured, by certain experience, [Page 20] that the mysteries couched in those holy writings, cannot be profitably understood, but by the same spirit which inspired the penmen of them; therefore it is vain pre­sumption, for fallen and unregenerate man, by his earthly wisdom and human learning, to attempt the unfolding heavenly mysteries. The lip of truth hath signified, they are hid from the wise and prudent of this world, and revealed unto the humble dependent babes and sucklings; those who sensibly experience their sufficiency for every good word and work, to proceed immediately from God alone; and that Christ ‘is made unto them, wisdom and righteousness, sanctification and redemption.’ The want of this inward living sense, hath been the cause of, and hath opened the way for, that great apostasy, dark­ness, and error, which have overspread Chris­tendom, so called. There is no way for its recovery, but by humbly submitting to Christ inwardly revealed, and learning the nature of true religion of him, the great author thereof: for I am well assured, that forward active and inventing self must be denied, abased, and laid in the dust for ever, and the Lord alone exalted in our hearts, before we can come up in the seve­ral duties of religion, with divine appro­bation. This I saw, in the divine light which began to shine out of my darkness, and separated me therefrom, was the great­er light which was to rule the day of [Page 21] God's salvation, and that all the saved of the Lord must carefully walk in this light, wherein there is no occasion of stumbling. I also saw, that when it pleased the Lord in wisdom, for a trial of my faith and pa­tience, to withdraw this holy light, and there was a sitting in darkness, and as in the region of the shadow of death for a time, so that I had no distinct knowledge therefrom what to do; that it was my indispensible duty to stand still, and wait for my sure unerring guide; if at those times, self would arise and be uneasy, it must be brought to the cross, there to be slain. By such experience, I found I was nothing, and that God was all things necessary for soul and body; that if I was brought into a state of perfect reconciliation with him, I must know all things made new.

About this time I had a distant view of being called into the work of the ministry; my mind being at times wonderfully over­shadowed with the universal love of God, in the glorious gospel of his Son, to mankind, to that degree that I thought I could, in the strength thereof, give up to spend and to be spent, for the gathering of souls to him, the great Shepherd of Israel; and that I could lift up my voice like a trumpet, to awaken the inhabitants of the earth: but I found all this was only by way of prepa­ration for this important work, and that I had not yet received a commission to engage [Page 22] therein. A fear was upon my mind, and care, lest I should presume to enter upon this solemn undertaking without a right call; it appearing to me exceeding danger­ous to speak in the name of the Lord, without a clear evidence in the mind, that he required it of me; which I then fully believed he would in his own time, which was to be waited for. From this time, until I was really called into the work, I frequently had, but especially in religious meetings, openings of scripture-passages, with lively operations of the divine power in my mind; and sometimes with so much energy, that I have been almost ready to offer what I had upon my mind, to others. But as, through an holy awe which dwelt upon my heart, I endeavoured to try my offering in the unerring balance of the sanctuary, I found it was too light to be offered, and was thankful to the Lord for his merciful preservation, in that I had been enabled to avoid offering the sacrifice of fools. But when the time really came that it was divinely required of me, the evidence was so indisputably clear, that there was not the least room to doubt; yet, through fear and human frailty, I put it off, and did not give way thereunto. But oh! how was I condemned in myself! The divine sweet­ness which had covered my mind in the meeting was withdrawn, and I left in a very poor disconsolate state, wherein I was [Page 23] ready to beg forgiveness, and to covenant with the Lord, that if he would be pleased to favour me again in like manner, I would give up to his requiring. At the next first-day meeting, the heavenly power over­shadowed me in a wonderful manner, in which it was required of me to kneel down in supplication to the Lord in a few words: I gave way thereunto, in the dread of his power, with fear and trembling. After which, oh, how my soul was filled with peace and joy in the Holy Ghost! I could then sing, and make sweet melody in my heart to the Lord. As I remember, I was twenty-one years of age, the very day I first entered into this great and awful work of the ministry; which was the 21st of the 5th month, old stile, 1734.

I have found my mind engaged to be some­what particular concerning the manner of my entering into the work of the ministry, to stand by way of caution and proper en­couragement to others, who may peruse the same; having in the course of my observation had cause to fear, some have taken the work of preparation, as before hinted, for the thing itself; and so have proceeded very far, to their own great wounding, and the hurt of others, in bring­ing forth untimely fruit, which is exceed­ingly dangerous, and carefully to be avoid­ed. Nothing is a sufficient guard to pre­serve therefrom, but the single eye, through [Page 24] the divine blessing, awfully considering what a great thing it is for dust and ashes to speak as the apostle Peter directs, viz. ‘As every man hath received the gift, even so minister the same one to another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man mi­nister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth.’ The author to the Hebrews saith, that ‘no man taketh this honour to himself, but he that is called of God, as was Aaron.’ So that what­ever some may pretend to, and intrude themselves into, unless they are really cal­led of God, they will have no share in that honour that cometh from God only.

The church of Christ hath not been with­out its trouble from false ministers, neither in the primitive times, nor in ours. That excellent gospel liberty of all who feel themselves inspired thereunto, whether male or female, speaking or prophesying one by one, hath been, and still is, abused by false pretenders to divine inspiration; yet the liberty ought to be preserved inviolable, and other means found out to remedy this great inconveniency; which would not be difficult, were the members in a general way spiritually minded, rightly favouring the things that be of God. Forward and un­sanctified appearances, by way of ministry, would then be easily awed and suppressed, [Page 25] so as not to disturb the peace of the church. The case has been otherwise, as I have observed in some places; but little minded, if the words and doctrine were sound, and no­thing to blame in the conversation. Here the main thing, which is the powerful demonstration of the holy spirit, is little regarded: and if a few are deeply pained at heart with such lifeless ministry, they find it exceeding difficult to lay hands there­on, for want of more strength; especially when they perceive what strength there is against them: for formal professors love to have it so, rather than to sit in silence. And I have observed such pretenders all mouth or tongue, and no ears to receive instruction; fond of teaching others, but very unteachable themselves. I pray God to quicken his people, and raise the society into a more lively sense of that blessed arm of power which gathered us to be a people; or, I fear, the great evil above hinted at will prove a very growing one: profession without possession, being the proper element for such a ministry to grow and florish in. I am not quite free to omit a remark on this head, as I am fully persuaded the living members of the church of Christ, groan under a painful sense of this sorrowful token of a declined society. May the Lord of sabbath hear their cries, and regard the anguish of their souls in secret, so as to work by his invisible power [Page 26] for his own name's sake, and their enlarge­ment, by turning his hand again upon our Sion, to purge away her dross, and to take away her tin and reprobate silver; that her judges may be restored as at the first, and her counsellors as at the beginning; that many, having their feet shod with the pre­paration of the gospel of peace, may yet ap­pear beautiful upon the mountains! So be it, saith my soul!

I have given some hints how it was with me, by way of preparative for the great and important work of the ministry, and the danger of my being misled; even at some­times when I had right openings, and felt the sweet efficacious virtue of the love of God, through Jesus Christ, to mankind: which, doubtless, is the sensible experience and enjoyment, at times, of every faithful follower of Christ, who never was called to the work of the ministry. I was in those days apprehensive of some danger of being led out at that door; but I have since more fully and perfectly seen the danger of this and other by-paths, which would have led me to give that away to others, which I was to live upon myself; and [...]ut of the humble dependant state, in which only there is safety, to have a will and way of my own, that I might be furnished and enriched with much treasure. But sincerity of heart, and my endeavours to preserve the single eye, through the watchful care of [Page 27] Divine Providence over me, brought the day of the Lord upon it all: so that I came clearly to see, and experimentally to know, my sufficiency was of God; that there must be a steady dependance on the Lord, to be immediately fitted and supplied, every time I was to engage in this solemn service. I ardently desire, that all who have the least apprehension of being called into the work of the ministry, may dwell in an holy dread of the divine presence, and know their own wills wholly subjected to the divine will; waiting for a distinct and clear certainty of the Lord's requirings, not only in entering upon it at first, but also at all other times. And as self comes to be laid in the dust for ever, they will receive undeniable evi­dence, in their own minds, of the certainty of their mission; and they will not be with­out a testimony thereof, from the witness for God in the consciences of mankind, amongst whom they are sent to minister. They will be a savour of life to the living in the truth, and of death to those who are in a state of death. Let it ever be remem­bered, that nothing of, or belonging to, man, can possibly add any lustre or dignity to so divine a gift. Neither will the best and most curiously adapted words or doc­trine, ever so truly and consistently deliver­ed, be any more than as sounding brass, or as a tinkling cymbal, without the power, light, and demonstration of the spirit of [Page 28] Christ. There is no occasion at all, for those who regard his power as the substance of their ministry, to be any wise solicitous about words; as the lowest and most sim­ple are really beautiful, when fitly spoken under that holy influence.

Having thus entered upon the solemn and awful service of the ministry, I gave up for the most part, as I found the requirings of truth, through the divine power and effi­cacy thereof, moving upon my heart, and subjecting my will, to utter a few words in a broken manner, with fear and trem­bling; the Lord being exceeding merciful to me, as a tender father, taking me by the hand, and making me willing by his mighty power, to be counted a fool for his sake and the gospel's.

The meeting I then belonged to was large, and a valuable weighty body of friends therein; who, as far as I could observe by their carriage, did own and approve of my weak and low appearance in this service: yet they used Christian prudence, not to lay hands suddenly, but gave me full oppor­tunity to make proof of my ministry, and to feel my feet therein.

About this time, a fine spring of minis­try was opened within the compass of our Yearly-Meeting; there having, by account, about one hundred opened their mouths in publick testimony, in little more than a year; divers of whom became powerful able [Page 29] ministers, and some of them withered away like unripe fruit. About ten appeared with­in that time, in the particular meeting of Abington, to which I belonged.

As I was enabled to wait on my ministry, I experienced a considerable growth and en­largement; and, in a faithful discharge of duty therein, great peace and heavenly con­solation, like a pleasant refreshing stream, flowed into my soul. I also found, that it was a means of engaging the minds of friends, in a sweet and comfortable near­ness of unity with me, which I had never before so largely and livingly felt. Many young well-minded people, and some others of little experience, seemed to admire my gift, and would sometimes speak highly of it, which they did not always forbear in my hearing. But oh how dangerous this is, if delighted in by ministers! It may be justly compared to poison, which will soon destroy the pure innocent life. My judg­ment was against it; yet I found something in me, that seemed to have no aversion thereunto, but rather inclined to hearken to it, yet not with full approbation. The same thing in me would want to know, what such and such, who were in most esteem for experience and wisdom, thought of me. I sometimes imagined such looked shy upon me, which would much cast me down; all which, being from a root or fibre of self, I found was for judgment, [Page 30] and must die upon the cross, before I was fit to be trusted with any great store of gospel treasure. I begun also to take ra­ther too much delight myself in the gift; which had not divine goodness in mercy, by a deep and distressing baptism, kindly pre­vented; might have opened a door for spiri­tual pride (which is the worst of pride) to have entered in, to my ruin. I have reason to think, that solid friends, by observing my large growth in the top, with spreading branches, were in fear of my downfall, in case of a storm. However, in the midst of my high career, the Lord was pleased to take away from me, for a time, that which he had given me, viz. the gift of the mini­stry, and with it all sensible comforts of the spirit: so that I was, as I thought, in total darkness; even in the region and sha­dow of death. In this doleful state of mind, I was grievously beset and tempted by the false prophet, the transformer, to keep up my credit in the ministry, by continuing my publick appearances. It might well be said of him, that he would ‘cause fire to come down from heaven, in the sight of men, to deceive them;’ for so I found it. It is hard to imagine, how near a resem­blance he could make, how exact an imi­tation he could form of the very thing it­self, to the state of mind I was then in; even to that degree, that I have at times been ready to say, 'Ah! I see and feel the [Page 31] fire of the Lord coming down to prepare the offering'; and have been almost ready to give up thereunto, when a godly fear would seize my mind, and a desire yet to try it; by which means, the strong delusion hath been discovered, and the false fire rejected. My soul hath been plunged into deeper anxiety, by this false heat, than I was in before. No tongue nor pen can set forth to the full, the deep and almost constant anguish of my soul, for about the space of four or five months; being as near as I can remember the time this sore affliction was upon me. It fared with me in some degree, as it did with Job, respecting my friends; some conjecturing one thing, and some another thing, to be the cause of this fall, as it was apprehended; though, through mercy, they could not charge me with any evil as the cause thereof. The most probable reason to them, of this alte­ration was, that I had been too much set up by others, and so had lost my gift; and this, I think, came the nearest to the truth of the case. Yet it was not so lost, but that when my gracious helper saw my suffer­ing was enough, he restored it again, and appeared to my soul as a clear morning with­out clouds: everlasting praises to his holy name! My mind was deeply bowed in hum­ble thankfulness, under a sense of the great favour of being again counted worthy to be intrusted with so precious a gift; therefore I [Page 32] was careful to exercise the same in great fear and awfulness, and more in a cross to mine own will than before; as that which was but too likely to have decked itself therewith, was, for the present at least, in a good degree slain. I have very often, in the course of my religious experience, had cause to adore and admire divine wisdom, in his dealings with me for my preserva­tion in the way of peace; being well assured, that he will so work for mankind, if they are sufficiently given up in heart and soul to him, that it will not be possible for them to miss of everlasting happiness; for none are able to pluck those out of his almighty hand, who do not first incline to leave him.

After I had appeared in publick some­what more than two years, I found some drawings of gospel-love, as I apprehended, to visit the meetings of friends in some part of New-Jersey; and being but young in the ministry, I was in great fear, at times, lest I should be mistaken, in that which I, at other times, thought to be the divine requirings: for I much dreaded that of run­ning when and where the Lord did not send me, lest I should bring dishonour to his blessed name, and expose myself naked and void of proper qualifications for so great an undertaking, to wise and discerning friends. Great indeed was my distress, night and day, crying to the Lord for [Page 33] greater confirmation; which he graciously heard, and was pleased, by a dream or night-vision, to afford me such full satisfaction in, that I do not remember I had any doubt afterwards concerning the same.

I entered upon the said journey the 7th of the 8th month 1736; having a companion much older than myself every way. We visited the following meetings, viz. Piles­grove, Salem, Aloways-creek, and Cohansey, where my companion left me, and returned home, being under some discouragement about the journey in his own mind. But as I found the Lord by his blessed power near, opening my mouth, and enlarging my heart abundantly in his work, I was encouraged thereby to proceed, being join­ed in travel by an innocent friend belong­ing to Aloways-creek-meeting, who had a few words to drop in meetings. We went from Cohansey, through a great desart or wilder­ness, for about forty miles, without inhabi­tants, to Cape May, where we had a meet­ing. From thence to Great and Little Egg-Harbour, and had meetings. From thence, through the wilderness, to the yearly-meet­ing at Shrewsbury, which was large, and much favoured with the divine presence: divers ministering friends from Pennsylvania were there, viz. Thomas Chalkley, Robert Jordan, John and Evan Evans, Margaret Preston, and others.

[Page 34]It neither suited with my growth in the ministry, nor my inclination, to take up much time in those large meetings. I there­fore, for the most part, gave way to such as were better qualified for the work, and in my esteem worthy of double honour. I had a great regard in my mind for those whom I thought as pillars in the house of God, whether ministers or elders; and really think, if such had given it as their sense, that I was wrong in my offerings, at any time, I should have been more likely to have depended on their judgment than my own. I looked upon myself, for many years, as a child in experience every way; and therefore thought a subjection was due from me, to those who were fathers and mothers in Israel, and never, that I remem­ber, manifested any disregard to them; which is now a satisfaction to my mind. But, I confess, I have at times since had cause to marvel at the forwardness of some, who though but children, if rightly child­ren, have undertaken the work of men, hardly discovering a willingness to give the preference to any; and when they have been admonished by those of much more experi­ence than themselves, they have been apt to retort, or to plead a divine commission, and that it is right to obey God rather than man; as if they had the sole right of speak­ing and judging too. I had divers times seen the great danger of being deceived and misled by the transformer; and therefore was [Page 35] afraid of being over confident of mine own sight, and looked upon it the safest way to stand quite open for instruction, come from what quarter it would; there being nothing more desired by me, than to be right.

This large meeting ended well, and sweetly. Praises to the Lord over all for ever! From thence I went to the following meetings, viz. Chesterfield, Trenton, Bordentown, Mansfield, Upper Springfield, Old Spring­field, Burlington, Bristol, the Falls, Ancocas, Mount-holly, Evesham, Chester, Haddonfield, and Woodbury Creek; from whence I re­turned home. The Lord made my journey prosperous, and was to me, at times, as a fountain unsealed, furnishing daily for the work he had engaged me in; being, in wonderful condescension to my weak estate, both wisdom and utterance; as it is written, ‘Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings thou hast ordained strength.’ Praises to his holy name for ever!

Notwithstanding the Lord committed un­to me a dispensation of the gospel, and was pleased to reward my sincere labours therein, with the sweet incomes of peace and joy in the Holy Ghost, and with the unity of the brethren, in a comfortable degree; yet great were my temptations, and various the com­bats I had, for divers years after; with my soul's enemies. Oh! how hard I found it to keep from being defiled, more or less, [Page 36] with the polluting floods, which were al­most continually poured out of the great red dragon's mouth, in order to carry away my imagination into unlawful delights, from which I did not always wholly escape; being sometimes prevailed upon to set bounds to myself, that though I would not directly fall into the evil I was tempted to, yet I might take some distant delight and satisfaction, in approaching as near thereunto as I thought was lawful. Thus, for want of a watchful care, not only to shun that which I knew to be really evil, but also every appearance of evil, I sometimes brought great anguish and deep distress upon my own mind; and when I had gone but a little out of the right way, I found many, oh! many weary steps and painful heart-achings, before I was re­ceived into the way and favour of the hea­venly Father again. I have often since been humbly thankful for his preservation, even out of gross evils, considering my danger­ous tampering therewith at times in the imagination. How can weak mortals deter­mine what length they will go, when any way is given? Most certain it is, they go out greatly to their hurt, who take any plea­sure at all in the thoughts of forbidden things. I have found, by woful experience, that when the least way is given to the enemy, he gains much advantage over us, and we are greatly enfeebled thereby; so that, instead of growing as willows by the [Page 37] water-courses, there is danger of withering, and becoming of those that draw back, in whom the Lord hath no pleasure. I have found it the first subtil working of Satan, to draw me off from a constant care of bringing all my thoughts, words, and actions to be tried by the light of Christ in mine own heart; and instead thereof, to examine them by my partial reasoning part. Here, many things really evil in their nature, or tendency, or both, would carry the appear­ances of indifferency; the pleading would then be, there is no harm in this, that, or the other thing: yet there hath been a doubt perhaps in the mind to reason away, not duly considering, that he who doubt­eth, is condemned if he receive. So I have many times found it, when the judge of all hath been pleased to arise, and to find me out, with my fig-leaf covering on; having very imprudently, by giving way to wrong things, in a great measure lost the garment of innocence, and an holy confidence to­wards God, Oh! how very hot hath my neglect occasioned the furnace to be made, that so the dross might be done away.

Thus it was with me, until the many chas­tenings of the heavenly Father had brought me into more fear, care, and subjection. I could not be quite easy to omit giving these hints of my many weaknesses and failings, that others may learn thereby to be aware. This I apprehend to be the chief [Page 38] reason of our having the failings and mis­carriages of God's people transmitted to us in the holy scriptures. Thou traveller Sion­ward, look forward to the joy set before thee, not suffering thine eyes to wander about thee, lest they convey such delight to thy heart, as may infect thy soul with pernicious distempers, by which thou mayest be rendered unable to proceed on thy jour­ney towards the holy city; and through the defect occasioned thereby to thy sight, thou mayest, in a great measure, lose the glori­ous prospect of its beautiful situation, and the splendor of its structures. Beware thou do not load thyself with the seeming plea­sant fruit of that country through which thou travellest: although they may appear to hang plentifully on each hand, they will neither be of any use to thee in that hea­venly country whither thou art going, nor for refreshment on the way thither. If thou hast a mind to make thine own way pro­sperous, look steadily forward, with a single eye, to the recompence of reward. Bring every motion towards seeking of satisfaction in forbidden places, immediately to the cross, and thou wilt much sooner find the yoke of Christ made easy, and his burden light; all his ways pleasant, and his paths peace. This is abundantly better than that uneasy in and out way of travelling, sinning and repenting, repenting and sinning again; which lays a foundation for murmuring, [Page 39] labour, and toil; crying out, as some do all their days, there is no complete victory to be obtained over sin on this side of the grave. Miserable sinners we must remain, when the cause thereof is wholly in themselves; because they will not come into, and abide in, the help of the Lord, against the mighty enemies of their soul's happiness, which is altogether sufficient to give a complete vic­tory over them; yea, to give power to tri­umph, and say, ‘We are made more than conquerors through him that hath loved us.’

The 8th month 1737, I set out in order to visit some meetings in East-Jersey; hav­ing Richard French, an ancient friend, to bear me company. We had meetings at Stonybrook, Bethlehem, Lebanon, and at a Baptist's house near Black-River. None of our society were thereabouts, but there were some ranters of Rogers's followers, who had taken upon them the name of Qua­kers, to the great scandal of friends in that remote place: they came to the meeting, being mostly women. Their impatient rest­less spirits would not suffer them to let us hold our meeting quietly; yet they did not seem inclinable to contend, but rather to flatter and applaud us. Some of them stood up, after we had severally delivered what we had upon our minds, to signify their unity with our doctrine, pretending it to be the same they held forth to the peo­ple, [Page 40] though not enough regarded by them. But we were not free to receive their testi­mony, any more than Paul and Silas could that maid's who was possessed with an evil spirit; but rebuked them openly, and pub­lickly declared our disunity with them, de­siring the people not to look upon them as belonging to the society of the people called Quakers, as we could assure the meeting it was not so; and that we had no more unity with those pretenders, than they had. I thought the chief service we had at that place, was to testify against those wild fran­tick people, who we found had, by being accounted Quakers, caused the way of truth to be evil spoken of. This unexpected op­position raised their flighty spirits, so that they became very troublesome, being full of words, and asking frivolous questions. Whereupon that of Paul, to some such wo­men in the Corinthian church, came fresh into my mind. I therefore called out aloud, "Let your women be silent in the church;" and opened to them, that it was such women as they were, that the apostle rebuked and commanded to be silent; who not experi­encing their spirits to be truly subjected, that they might know how to speak con­cerning the things of God with a right un­derstanding, ought to learn in silence: not meaning to exclude those of mine own sex in the like case; the same being as necessary for them. We left them as full of them­selves [Page 41] as we found them, and went from thence to Whippany, where, in a friend's house, we had a precious meeting. The greatest number being of other societies, the testimony of truth flowed forth freely; they appearing to be much tendered and affected therewith. After meeting, some of them took us by the hand, and in an affectionate manner expressed their satisfaction with our labours amongst them. From thence we went to Plainfield, and Woodbridge, where we had meetings. After which we returned home; having been favoured to accomplish this little journey to my own satisfaction.

Sometime before I entered upon the be­fore-mentioned journey, I found my mind pretty strongly drawn, and much inclined, to enter into a marriage state with a young woman belonging to the same meeting, with­in the compass of which I had lately taken a farm, and to which I was then joined by certificate. Her name was Rebekah, the daughter of Josiah and Sarah Fearn, and grand-daughter of John Blunston: she being a valuable branch of a good stock. By the death of her brother, she was then possessed of that part of her said grandfather's estate, where he had lived, and entertained friends from almost the first settlement of Pennsyl­vania, until his death; which afterwards was continued by his widow many years, but of late years had been laid aside. [Page 42] It was in Lower Derby, about seven miles from Philadelphia, near a large meet­ing; the meeting-house being built on some of that tract of land. The reason of my being so particular in this account, is to shew the Lord's kindness, and gracious con­descension to me, in so fully answering what I had so often desired, viz. that in case I ever married and settled, I might be so placed and circumstanced, as to entertain the Lord's servants and messengers in an agreeable manner: on which account, as well as that he was pleased to give me an affectionate virtuous wife, I had, and have great cause of humble thankfulness. We took each other in marriage the 30th of the 10th month 1737, at a large and solemn meeting, held in the meeting-house before-mentioned, under the precious overshadow­ing of the power of divine love; I think to a larger degree than I had often, if ever, known before: which was no small confir­mation of our being rightly joined together; it being that alone which can truly enable to make and keep covenant rightly with each other.

After marriage, I constantly attended our particular meeting, both on first and other days of the week; also the quarterly and yearly-meetings as they fell in course, and frequently visited adjacent meetings. I vi­sited friends in the county of Bucks twice, but have no account by me of the exact [Page 43] time. I signified to my wife, some time after we were married, that I did expect, in a few years, I should find a concern to leave her for a longer time than I yet had done, and gave her a hint what time I thought it would be; which fell out accordingly; having then a distant view of visiting New-England.

When the time for undertaking that jour­ney appeared clear to me, I gave up thereto, in humble resignation and faith in the suf­ficiency of that divine power which I be­lieved required it of me; yet not without some intervals of discouragement, and rea­soning in myself what would become of my family and outward concerns: neither did I then know of any companion to join with me in this great undertaking, but at times believed I should be favoured with one, if I gave up thereunto. However, I laid my con­cern before the monthly-meeting to which I belonged, requesting their concurrence and certificate, if upon a weighty consideration thereof, they had unity with my concern. A certificate was prepared, whereby I was left to my liberty to proceed; but I had not yet heard of a companion, and greatly feared going without. Our quarterly-meet­ing falling quickly after, I went to it, where I soon made inquiry of my much esteemed friend John Churchman, whether he knew of any suitable companion for me. He readily told me that his brother-in-law, [Page 44] William Brown, had procured a certificate in order for the same journey, and did not then know of any companion, but believed one would be provided for him. This was very acceptable to me. When William Brown and I had an opportunity of con­ferring together, which was the same day, we found our concerns and views so exact­ly agree, and our spirits so closely united for the service, that our hearts bowed in thankfulness to the Lord, for his care and providence over us; believing what we were about to engage in, was agreeable to his will, and in his counsel. It being the meeting for ministers and elders that day, we laid our concern before that meeting, where it appeared to be well approved, which was no small strength to us. I did then, and hope ever shall, greatly love and highly value the unity of the brethren; having found it no small strength and en­couragement to me, in many low and try­ing times, which are necessary and unavoid­able in that solemn engagement of visit­ing the churches; especially now in their low declined state. It became indisputably clear to my understanding, that it is alto­gether impossible to administer, in a feel­ing effectual manner, to people's several states, unless we are baptized thereinto. Well adapted words, and sound doctrine, as to the external appearance, may, with­out much difficulty, be attained; seeing we [Page 45] have the holy scriptures, and many other good books, containing the principles of truth, and the Christian experience of the Lord's people: yet all this, delivered with the tongue of men or angels, will prove an empty, fruitless sound, without the power and demonstration of the spirit of Christ, who enables his upright-hearted ministers to search all things, yea, the hidden mys­tery of iniquity, as well as the deep things of God, even as he led his prophet Ezekiel to look through the hole in the wall, that the most secret abomination may be brought to light, and testified against.

I took leave of my dear wife, and set out with my before-mentioned companion, the 5th of the 7th month, 1741. Passing through New Jersey, we had a meeting at Chester­field. We crossed Staten-Island, and came to an arm of the sea, called the Narrows, which separates the before-mentioned island from Long-Island. The wind blowing very strong, and the sea running exceeding high, we were obliged to wait some time; the ferry-men being afraid to run the hazard of carrying us (and divers others who were there also waiting) over. Towards evening the wind somewhat abating, they appeared willing to venture, if we would; and we being desirous to proceed, agreed to go. I think we had eight or nine horses, besides people, in the boat. They set all their heads to the wind, which proved of singular ser­vice, [Page 46] in bearing up the boat against it, otherwise it did not seem altogether impro­bable, but that she would have been laid on her side. We ran over in about ten minutes, which is accounted at least two miles and an half. We were thankful for preservation; as I believe most, or all of us, when we were on the water, apprehended some considerable danger. We made but little stay on Long-Island, only taking New­town meeting in our way. Then crossing the water, to the main land in New-York government, had meetings at Mamaroneck, Long-reach, and the Purchase. From thence, having a guide provided for us, we set out for our journey, about 200 miles through the colony of Connecticut to Rhode-Island. We met with a kind reception and entertain­ment for our money, at a very low rate, amongst the high professing Presbyterians of this colony: the case was very different formerly, when our friends were banished from thence by a law. I remarked, as I passed along, very good order observed in their inns; and, as far as could be discovered, the people in general appeared to be sober, and religious in their way; far from being so vitiated and corrupt as I have found those in the mother-country, as they call it. We were attacked divers times by some of them on religious subjects, but, through divine favour, were enabled to an­swer them in such a manner, as that I hope [Page 47] neither we, nor the truth professed by us, suffered thereby. I can say with thank­fulness, I never was at a loss in giving answers to those that asked a reason of the hope that was in me, when I had my chief dependance on the Lord to be furnished im­mediately by him alone, without leaning to mine own understanding. We were kind­ly received by our friends at Newport on Rhode-Island, where there is a large body; some of whom we found much hurt by differences and parties about government affairs; which caused hard close work for us in their meetings. From Rhode-Island we went to the island of Nantucket, where is also a large body of friends, amongst whom we had good satisfaction. We then returned to the main land, visiting meetings as follow­eth, viz. Sandwich, Yarmouth, Suckanesset, and a quarterly meeting at Pembroke, where we met our friend Samuel Hopwood, who was arrived at Boston from England a few days before, in company with Moses Aldrich, on a religious visit. From thence we went to Boston, where we had a meeting, there being a small number of friends in the town; but truth never pro­spered much there: it seemed to me, that something of the same spirit was yet alive, and to be felt, that formerly would have wholly extirpated our friends, and truth as held by them, from the face of the earth, and prevailed to inflict cruel suffer­ings [Page 48] on many of the Lord's servants, four of whom they put to death, as is related at large in a book entitled, New-England Judged, written by George Bishop, and in Sewel's History of the People called Quakers. Happening to walk into the prison-yard, I observed a very ancient building, which I judged, by its appearance, might have been the same our friends had formerly suffered very great hardships in. Upon which I asked some present, if that was the prison their forefathers put our friends into? A woman answered, Yes; and added, 'It was a very wicked thing of the rulers of that time, for the land had suffered for it ever since;' or to that import. A friend of Boston related to me, what he said he had from an ancient inhabitant of that town, who had seen that wicked act of putting to death the four friends as above hinted, viz. that he could well remember fine wheat growing about and near Boston; that he never knew nor heard of any wheat blasted, or pease eaten by bugs, until they put the Quakers to death; and that they never could raise ei­ther wheat or pease near that town since, perhaps not within 15 or 20 miles: though I suppose the inhabitants were so often disappointed formerly, that they have not attempted to raise any lately, the land being generally turned to grazing, and for raising Indian corn. They seem sensible of the extraordinary alteration; but I suppose few [Page 49] of them are willing to attribute it to that cause. I had some discourse with one of the inhabitants, as we were riding toge­ther near Boston, concerning the above-mentioned wonderful event. He pretended to argue a natural cause for it; but I en­deavoured to shew him, that (according to my apprehension) those very reasons which he advanced to prove a natural cause for the change, if they proved any thing, I thought it was directly the contrary of what he intended, viz. he urged, that clearing away the woods might have so changed ther nature of the air, as to have produced a blasting quality therein. But if the airy, any thing resembles the watry element herein, the freer its course, and the less the obstruction it meets with, the more it purges and purifies itself, and is therefore the less capable of producing hurtful consequences either to vegetables or animals.

We passed on from thence, and had meetings at Lynn, Salem, Cachechy, Dover, Hampton, Haverhill, Aimsbury, Newbury, Taunton, Coxett, and to Dartmouth yearly-meeting, which was held there and at Akushnet four days: it was a large meeting. After which, we had meetings at Rochester, Freetown, Swan­zey, Leicester, Smithfield, Providence Woods, at one Harris's, Greenwich, South Kingston, Connanicut-Island, Portsmouth, Tiverton, Little Compton, and so to Newport again: divers of which meetings were large. The [Page 50] Lord was graciously pleased to furnish us, according to the occasion, painfully to la­bour amongst the professors of truth in those parts, many of whom appeared to us igno­rant, in a sorrowful degree, of the life and nature of true religion. Our spirits were often very deeply baptized on their account, in great travail, that Christ might be formed in them. It was a very exercising laborious journey, but the Lord mercifully made all up to us, by the comfortable enjoyment of his love and peace flowing into our hearts. Glory to his name for ever!

From Newport we set our faces home­wards, taking Westerly meeting in our way, and proceeded through the colony of Con­necticut to Long-Island; upon which we had meetings at Cowneck, Joseph Lea­tham's, Jericho, Westbury, Matinicock, and were at the quarterly-meeting at Flushing. From thence we crossed the water to West­chester on the main; got thither some time before the hour appointed for the meeting, and staid a while at an inn in the town. The landlady coming into our room in a pleasant manner, said, 'I suppose you are travelling friends?' My answer was, We are travellers, and we are friends; therefore we are travelling friends; 'But I suppose, said she, you are preachers;' and added, 'I like your way very well, as you come up to the command of Christ, in travel­ling about as you do, more fully than our [Page 51] ministers: but there is something lack­ing with you' What is that, said I? 'Why, said she, you should baptize as well as preach. I then asked her what we should baptize withal. She replied, 'With water to be sure; for it is not in the power of man to baptize with any thing else.' Upon which, I shewed her from the holy scriptures, that the primitive ministers of Christ were so gifted, as to be able to baptize believers into the name or power, of the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost; instancing, in particular, that passage of Peter at the house of Cornelius, Acts xi. 15, 16. ‘And as I began to speak, the Holy Ghost fell on them, as on us at the beginning. Then remembered I the word of the Lord, how that he said, John indeed baptized with water; but ye shall be baptized with the Holy Ghost.’ It is evident from this account, that by the effectual preaching of Peter, the Gentiles were baptized with the Holy Ghost; and as the dispensation of God to man is the same now it was then, and he has graciously pro­mised to be with his ministers always to the end of the world, and man, by nature in a fallen degenerate estate, as much involved in sin, and a stranger to God as he was then; no good reasons can be given, why the same powerful efficacious means are not as necessary for his recovery, by a reconcilia­tion with his maker, as they were at that time. The woman was very attentive to [Page 52] what was said on the occasion, and seemed pretty much affected, being quite silenced as to that subject. We invited her to our meeting; she told us, it was what she in­tended, and also to prevail with her hus­band to go too, if she could, but doubted being successful therein. However, she and her husband were both at the meeting, and the Lord was graciously pleased to give us a precious opportunity together, wherein I am persuaded she was made in some degree sensible of that baptizing power, which, in a comfortable degree, accompanied the ministry that day. She was tendered, and, at parting, with tears desired us to remem­ber her and pray for her.

After this meeting we proceeded home­wards, taking three meetings in the Jerseys as they fell in our way, viz. Elizabeth-Town, Woodbridge, and Stonybrook. I got home the 7th of the 10th month, and found my dear wife and family well, which was cause of mutual thankfulness; having per­formed near as much in about three months, as was usually done in about four. It is very necessary to avoid both extremes in travelling on truth's account; neither to be over-hasty, nor too dilatory: yet I have al­ways found great satisfaction and peace, in being as diligent and expeditious therein, as sits easy on the mind, and the constitu­tion of body will bear; that all may have cause to be fully convinced, we travel not [Page 53] for outward pleasure, but from a necessity laid upon us; which will certainly add con­siderable weight to our service, and greatly tend, in the eyes of mankind, to maintain the credit of that truly disinterested gospel-ministry, the Lord hath been pleased to raise up amongst us as a people.

Having staid at home some time, to make necessary provision for an increasing family, I found a concern upon my mind to visit friends a second time on Long-Island and the main land in New-York govern­ment, and set out in order thereunto, the 27th of the 8th month, 1743; being ac­companied by my well esteemed friend, John Sykes. The first meeting we attended on the island, was a yearly-meeting, which was held on a first day at Matinicock. It was a large precious meeting; many not of our society being there, the Lord was plea­sed to open the doctrine of his kingdom largely, and his glorious truth was over all; to whom alone be the praise for ever! Notice was given at this meeting, of our intending to be on the next first-day at Westbury, not far from this place; and that week we had meetings at Brook­haven, Islip, Bethphage, Rockaway, Henry Willis's, and so to the before-mentioned meeting on first-day. Friends came to it from divers parts of the island, and also many people of other societies, so that it was a very large meeting. Their expecta­tion [Page 54] was greatly out after words, which the master of our assemblies did not see meet to gratify; for we were almost wholly shut up as to ministry; which I hope proved a pro­fitable lesson of instruction to many. After this meeting we crossed the water, and had meetings at Westchester, Mamaroneck, Long-reach, and Ryewoods; we then returned to the island, and had meetings at Flushing, Oyster-bay, Cowneck, Flushing again, and Newtown. Having finished our service thereaway, we travelled homewards, taking meetings as we passed along in East-Jersey, at Raliway, Plainfield, and Woodbridge; and in West-Jersey at Upper Springfield, and attended the quarterly-meeting at Cros­wicks; after which I returned home, and have to say with thankfulness, that the Lord was to me in this little journey, strength in weakness and riches in the time of poverty; and was pleased to con­duct me safe to my dear wife and family in peace.

About the latter end of the year 1744, I found my mind drawn to visit friends meet­ings in the western part of our county; and had meetings at East and West Not­tingham, Deer-Creek, New-Garden, Lon­don-Grove, Ockeshan, Kennet, and Con­cord. The Lord enabled me, either to do or suffer, in this little journey, as the same appeared to be my duty. At Ockeshan I was quite shut up as to words, yet had [Page 55] peace, believing it was my business that day, as it hath been many times since, in order (as I apprehend) to lead others into silence by example; as being the most profitable state they or I can possibly arrive at in mutability, in order to attain a right un­derdanding of all religious duties.

Soon after my return home, I went into West-Jersey, to visit the following meet­ings as I found my mind drawn thereunto, viz. Haddonfield, Chester, Evesham, Mount-Holly, Ancocas, Old-Springfield, Tren­ton, and Burlington quarterly-meeting, in which I had good satisfaction. I think it was about this time, I went in company with my well-beloved friend Michael Light­foot, to the yearly-meetings at Cecil, and Treadhaven in Maryland, wherein we were greatly favoured. He returned home­wards from Maryland, but I went to some meetings in the lower counties of Kent and Newcastle, had a meeting at Duck-Creek, and went to the yearly-meeting at Little-Creek, which was a very precious meeting, divine goodness greatly overshadowing the same, to the tendering many hearts. From thence I went to George's-Creek, and New­castle, and returned home.

I have no account by me, of any other journey in the service of truth, until the 2d month 1746, that I went in company with our worthy friend before-mentioned, to the yearly-meeting at Salem, in West-Jersey; and visited Cohansey, and Piles­grove [Page 56] meeting. In the 3d month the same year, I went to Chesterfield quarterly-meeting in the Jerseys, and had meetings at Stony-Brook, Burlington, and Haddon­field.

In the 5th month the same year, I vi­sited the county of Bucks, and had meet­ings at Middletown, Bristol, the Falls, Wrights-Town, Buckingham, and Plum­sted; taking North-Wales meeting in my return home. The Lord was my sure help and sufficiency in all these journies, affording the comfortable enjoyment of sweet peace in my return: to whom the praise (if any service was done) is, and I hope ever will be, freely offered up; for he alone is worthy thereof for ever!

Soon after my return home, great and inexpressible afflictions were permitted to befal me, and my greatly afflicted family, most of whom were seized with the bloody-flux; of which distemper I buried a daughter between four and five years old, and was taken very ill myself of the same disorder: in which time, my dear wife was deliver­ed of a child, and for a week or ten days after appeared hopeful to do well and recover; but being, in that condition, taken with the before-mentioned distemper, was in a short time removed from me by death, leaving me three small children, the youngest about two weeks and three days old, I found the Lord near to sup­port [Page 57] my distressed drooping spirit under this great affliction. I well remember, when my dear wife lay with great symp­toms of death upon her (having also some­times, as I thought, intervals of hopeful symptoms) my mind was in a very great and painful fluctuation between hope and fear. It seemed to me then impossible to give her up for death, and to be wholly separated from so valuable a companion; but the Lord, who formerly rebuked the winds and allayed the ragings of the sea, was pleased, as in an instant, to bring an holy calmness over my mind, in which there was an intire resignation to his divine will; so that I could say, with Job of old, ‘The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away, blessed be his name.’ I did not, from that time, look upon her as any more mine, but gave her up into his hands who had kindly bestowed her upon me. I write this by way of encouragement to others, that they may live in the fear of God, and give up in steady obedience to his re­quirings; and then, I am well assured, they may lean upon him in all their afflictions, and they will find to their comfort, that those things which appear impossible with man, are possible with God: who will make hard things easy and bitter things sweet to his humble followers. She departed this life the 22d of the 7th month, 1746; we having lived together near nine years.

[Page 58]I have this short testimony to give con­cerning my dear deceased wife; that she made it her early care to lead a sober and virtuous life; and I know a godly concern remained upon her mind, to keep a con­science void of offence, both towards God and man; being engaged (according to abi­lity received) for the promotion of the blessed truth, and gladly entertained the Lord's faithful labourers; esteeming it a blessing to be favoured with their company. And when I found a concern to travel abroad in the service of truth, she freely gave me up thereunto; having, with great satisfaction, to acknowledge the Lord's goodness, in favouring her with true peace and contentment in my absence; and also, in a steady trust and dependance on his providence, for our support every way in a faithful discharge of duty.

She was favoured with great calmness and resignation to the divine will, in her last illness, either to live or die; signify­ing, that she did not find any thing in the way; and that, if it pleased the Lord to remove her out of this world, she hoped it would be a glorious change to her, and that she should go to her little innocent babes who were gone before her; often confessing the Lord's goodness in giving her so much ease both of body and mind▪ She was very loving to those who visited her in her illness, and said, she had no­thing [Page 59] but love and goodwill to all. She took her leave of our children in a very tender and affectionate manner, committing them to divine providence, and expressing her belief, that his watchful care would be over them when she was gone. The apprentice and servant boys were called for, at her request; she took them by the hand, and in a loving tender manner, gave them good advice; an heavenly sweetness accom­panying her words, which much affected those present. She discovered great near­ness of affection to me, to almost the very last, and so departed this life in sweet peace, of which I was favoured, after her removal from me, with a certain evidence to my unspeakable satisfaction; whereby I plainly saw my great loss was her everlasting gain, and was enabled to bow in humble ac­quiescence to the divine will, who knows what is best, and orders all things in per­fect wisdom.

Being apprehensive that I should be con­cerned to travel pretty much abroad in the service of truth, for some years; I thought it my duty, as soon as I conveniently could, to place my children where they might be trained up in the way of truth, and to go myself out of business. This view or ap­prehension of things, had been gradually coming upon my mind for a considerable time; but now the weight thereof much increased; the [...]ime also of entering there­upon, [Page 60] appearing pretty clear to my mind: having found it my incumbent duty, not only to wait for a full confirmation of a right call to travel abroad in the work of the ministry, but also to know the accept­able time for engaging therein; all which will be fully discovered by such, as with a single eye to God's glory, desire, above all things, to be found faithful.

The first journey I entered upon, was a second visit to friends in New-England. I set out in order thereunto, the 23d of the 3d month, 1747, and was at two meetings in Burlington next day. From thence I went to a quarterly-meeting at Chester­field; after which I got to Flushing on Long-Island the 27th. Next day I at­tended their week-day meeting. The year­ly-meeting for that province then came on, which held four days. It was large, and the divine presence appeared therein to our mutual comfort and strength.

The 2d of the 4th month, being four in number, we set out for Rhode-Island; passing through the colony of Connecticut, we met with civil courteous usage, as be­fore, when I travelled through that country. I felt great love in my heart towards them, in which I had a strong persuasion, if not something of a foresight, that truth, in the Lord's time, will break forth and spread in that colony. For though I believe super­stition and bigotry are very predominant [Page 61] amongst them; yet they appeared to me in general, a cleaner people in their mo­rals, than in many other places where I have travelled. At New-Haven in that colony, they have a college in order to train up their ministers, &c. I found an inclination to go amongst the collegians, who gathered about me, carrying them­selves civil and respectful. I had much discourse and reasoning with them con­cerning our principles: they appearing de­sirous of information, I answered their questions in a concise manner; referring them to Robert Barclay's apology (which I supposed they had in their library) for a further explanation thereof. I could not help remarking, with pleasure, the becom­ing order they observed in their questions and answers: one at once, without the least flout, jeer, or any thing like mockery. I found work also amongst them, to remove the prejudice some had imbibed against us as a people, on account of the wicked and frantick behaviour and conduct of one Rogers and his followers; who, I think, dwelt about New-London in that pro­vince, calling themselves Quakers; and as there were none of the right sort, that people might see the difference, they were ready to conclude, that all the people cal­led Quakers were such, to the great re­proach of our society. I declared to them, that their actions were as much abhorred [Page 62] by us, as they could be by any people what­ever; that Rogers and his company of ran­ters were no more of our society than they were of theirs; that it would be very hard and unjust, if we, as a people, should be de­famed, by means of a crew, whom we had nothing farther to do with, than to let the world know our abhorrence of their practices, and that they took our name upon them, in all probability, as a cloak to cover their wickedness. These young students readily admitted what I said to be very just and reasonable. I believe this opportunity tended to the reputation of our society; and am sure it was to my comfort and satisfaction; feeling the love of God flow in mine heart towards those young men, some of whom I did not think far from the kingdom. I called again to see them in my return, and gave them some books, viz. two letters written by Samuel Crisp, giving reasons why he joined with the peo­ple called Quakers; a Treatise on Bap­tism, by William Dell; and I think some others, but do not now particularly re­member; which they received very kindly, still carrying themselves respectful to me. Now I am on these remarks, I cannot well omit taking notice of the great difference observed by me since in the nation of Eng­land, at the two great universities, in the behaviour of the students, whom they pre­tend to be training up for gospel-mini­sters, [Page 63] and for some other employments to get a living by. Oh! what floutings, jeer­ings, mockings, and deriding of that which is serious and humble like true religion! as though to work out our salvation with fear and trembling, were not now the way to the kingdom of God; but that a suf­ficient assurance, to scoff at and ridicule what in the primitive church and by the people of God in all ages, was accounted religious, were now the distinguishing mark of true Christians, and ministers of the gospel. How have they frequently broken in upon our peaceable quiet meetings, like the raging foaming waves of a troubled sea, casting up mire and dirt! Such a con­duct gives sober discerning people, cause to look upon them as a nest of unclean birds; who, instead of promoting true re­ligion, may be instrumental to subvert it. I have often wondered, seeing the conduct of many of these pretended gospel-ministers is obviously so very bad, not only whilst they are learning the trade of preaching, but also in their following the same for a livelihood; how it comes to pass that the people bear them. One reason that appears, is, the laws of the land are much in their favour; but the principal reason is, that people, in almost a general way, are stran­gers to the life and power of true religion; being satisfied with a profession thereof, and having itching ears, heap to them­selves [Page 64] teachers; erroneously supposing the principal part of religion to consist in per­forming what they call religious duties▪ as hearing sermons, prayers, and singing psalms, &c. some of the hearers being so dark as to say, such a one is a good teacher, though, perhaps, a drunkard, a swearer, or guilty of other evils. It is plain, that the strength and security of such ministers, is in the darkness and ignorance of people's minds. We do not read in the Revela­tions, of the locusts coming upon the earth, until the smoke arose out of the bottomless pit and darkened the sun and air; and whenever the children of men shall, in a general way, turn to the light of the Sun of Righteousness in their own hearts, mystery Babylon, the mother of harlots, must fall, and these her merchants will be wholly rejected. All their abominable craft will be fully discovered. Great will be their torment, fear, and distress in that day! The Lord Almighty hasten the time for his own name's sake, when all craft violence, and shedding of human blood may be at an end; and righteousness cover the earth, as water covers the sea!

Some of the inhabitants of New-Haven signified their desire that we should appoint a meeting there, but we did not find suf­ficient strength and courage to answer their request; so proceeded on our journey, and got to Newport, on Rhode-Island, the 8th [Page 65] of the 7th month. Here we were kindly received by friends, and attended their yearly-meeting, which begun at Ports­mouth, where it held only one day, being a meeting for worship; after which, the meetings for worship and business were held four days at Newport: they were very large and divinely favoured, so that those who depended on the Lord alone for wis­dom and strength, were enabled to come up in the discharge of their respective duties, to their peace and comfort. When this great meeting was over, I had meetings at Tiverton, Little Compton, Accoakeset, and Aponyganset, on first-day, and was at their monthly-meeting on second-day. Next morning, about eight o'clock, I went on board a vessel bound to the island of Nan­tucket, John Hanes master, where we ar­rived about one o'clock next morning. I staid upon this island about six days, and was at their yearly and monthly-meetings; having good satisfaction therein. I re­turned in the same vessel, and landed on the continent in about six hours; had a meeting at Falmouth, and went to their monthly-meeting at Sandwich, and attend­ed the quarterly-meeting which was held there. Here I met with divers friends from our parts who were on the service of truth. We had very close searching laborious ser­vice amongst them, as things were very low and much out of order; in part owing to [Page 66] the neglect of some members whose minds had been too much taken up with earthly things to watch over the flock, as those who must give an account. We endeavour­ed to lay the weight of things more closely upon the active members, and lest them to the Lord's dealings; knowing, ‘that al­though Paul may plant, and Apollos may water, it is he alone that can give the increase.’

I went from thence to Pembroke, where I had a meeting; and through Boston to Lynn, where I had a meeting also; thence to Salem monthly-meeting, and returned to Boston, and had two meetings there, being first-day. From thence I went directly to Rhode-Island, and had meetings at Ports­mouth, and Newport, to good satisfaction: the Lord giving power and dominion, by the blessed efficacy of his pure word of life, over all of a contrary nature to itself, whereby I was enabled to clear my mind, to my great ease and comfort. I then re­turned homewards with much satisfaction and peace of mind; taking meetings in my way at Connanicut-Island, and South Kingston; so proceeded on my journey through Connecticut, and lodged at New-Haven. I spent part of a day in conver­sation, and reasoning with some well dis­posed people, to satisfaction. I also visited the students as before hinted; after which I proceeded on my journey to Long-Reach, [Page 67] where I had a meeting, and went to the year­ly-meeting at West-Chester. From thence I travelled homewards, having, as hereto­fore, cause to be humbly thankful to the fountain of all goodness, who was near to help as the eye was single to him, in all proving times, whether in heights or depths; and as he was waited upon, gave wisdom and utterance. I desire he alone may for ever have the praise and glory, if any good is done; as there is no good but what proceeds from him. I had not been long returned from the before-mentioned jour­ney, when I laid before the monthly-meeting I belonged to, a concern which had been upon my mind some years, to visit the churches in divers parts of Great-Britain and Ireland; desiring their con­currence and certificate, if, upon weighty deliberation, they found unity with my proposal; intimating the time for entering upon that solemn undertaking had appeared to me for some time to be drawing near, and that I should look out for a passage before the end of the year. A certifi­cate was prepared, setting forth their unity with my service in the ministry, and with my intended journey; desiring my la­bours therein might tend to the edifica­tion of the churches where my lot should be cast, and for my return to them again in peace; also expressing that I had set­tled my outward affairs to the satisfaction [Page 68] of that meeting: for I had acquainted friends how I had settled them, as I thought it concerned them to be satisfied in that, as well as other things; it being my ear­nest desire to have the full concurrence of my brethren in so great an under­taking.

I took some little turns in visiting adja­cent meetings; and before the yearly-meet­ing came on, I went to North-Wales meet­ing, and about twenty miles further up the country to Richland, in order to take my leave of some friends and relations, as well as to visit that meeting. In my re­turn homewards I was taken very ill of what is there called the yellow fever; be­cause the patient is thereby turned as yellow as if he had the jaundice. I reached to the house of my worthy friend, Thomas Foulke, who, with his good wife and children, were as affectionately kind to me as if I had been one of their nearest relations. But this malignant fever greatly increased upon me. My sister was sent for, and several doctors were employed. Those who saw me concluded all was over, and that I must depart out of this life. I look little no­tice of any thing; yet I think I was for the most part sensible, and could perceive I was given up for death, by those who had the care of me. Once they thought I was near drawing my last breath; they therefore drew a pillow from under my head, and [Page 69] unbuttoned the neckband of my shirt, out of kindness, to make the last struggle be­tween life and death the easier. For my part, I could not see how it would go with me; but had not much, if any apprehen­sion of being taken away by death at that time. This sore illness happening in the yearly-meeting time, which was held that year at Philadelphia, I requested the cer­tificate I had obtained of the monthly-meeting, for my intended journey into Eng­land, &c. might be laid before the yearly-meeting of ministers and elders (as is usual in such cases) for the concurrence of friends; and if they found freedom and unity there­with, to signify the same to the brethren in England, by an indorsement thereon. It was laid before the said meeting by my good friend Michael Lightfoot, and the meetings free concurrence obtained; it was signed by a very great number of friends. This was done when many thought there would be no occasion for a certificate, as they fully expected it was near over with me, as to this world. But I was not easy to miss so good an opportunity of having a concern of so great importance solidly weigh­ed by such a substantial body of friends; as I was not likely to have such another opportunity, if the Lord should be pleased to raise me up again. This sore illness brought me very low indeed, so that when the fever abated, and I was fit to be helped [Page 70] out of bed, I could not stand alone; yet I recovered to admiration; being able, in about a week, to ride home in a chaise, about twenty-six miles; which I bore very well. On my return home, my friends and neighbours came to see me, greatly rejoice­ing at my recovery, which they did not expect from what some had seen and others had heard, for several of them visited me in my illness. This was a time of deep probation to me both inwardly and out­wardly; being tried, as I sometimes have been when great weakness of body hath been upon me, with sore and distressing poverty of spirit; not having distinct satis­faction and clearness in my own mind how it was with me as to my inward con­dition, judging an evidence of peace and comfort from the holy spirit would be a wonderful support at such times of bodily affliction; and have found it so, when it hath pleased the Lord to favour me there­with. But he knows what is best and most suitable for us; and therefore I find by ex­perience, it is the safest way to resign our wills to his holy will; as we must, for the most part, whilst in this militant state, walk by faith, and not by sight. I am fully persuaded such trying dispensations of di­vine providence to us, are greatly profitable for our growth in the way that is well pleasing to him; and if patiently borne, will, in his time, be a means to work for [Page 71] us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.

Soon after my health was restored, an ancient friend whose name was Peter Davis, from New-England, came to Phi­ladelphia in order to take a passage for England, and our friend Thomas Gawthrop having performed a religious visit to friends on the continent of America, intending to embark shortly for the same, with Isaac Greenleaf a friend on trade, I joined them; all agreeing to take our passage in a new ship bound for London.

One thing I would just remark, that some friends, and, as I understood, some others also, taking notice how providentially publick friends had been preserved during the war which was then with France and Spain, so that none of them had been taken by the enemy, did presume thereon; and would say There is no need to insure goods in that ship, as so many publick friends are going in her, she will doubt­less go safe. I much disliked this (as I thought) injustifiable confidence, seeing the judgments of the Lord are a great deep, being unsearchable, and his ways past our finding out. It becomes us in all our undertakings, to commit ourselves and all we have into his hands, in humble re­signation to do or suffer whatever his wis­dom may point out or permit to fall upon us, for the trial of our faith and [Page 72] patience; as his mercy, power, and goodness are as conspicuous in preserving, defending, and carrying us through great and uncom­mon probations to his glory, consequently to our own advantage in the end, as in wholly exempting us from them. Even Job had no cause to complain of his un­parallelled afflictions, when they were over and he saw how greatly he had profited thereby. A friend said to me before we embarked, he did not pretend to determine whether we should be taken or not; but however that might happen, he did be­lieve some friends in our station would be taken: not only to check that unwarrantable confidence in some, both friends and others, but he also apprehended, a service might arise from such being cast amongst those dark people, though against their will. I did not pretend any assurance in my own mind, of preservation out of the enemies hands; but was made willing to commit my soul, body, and all that I had unto the Lord, as into the hands of a faithful Creator, not doubting the sufficiency of his power for preservation in every condition of life.

On the 30th of the 9th month 1747, the before-mentioned friends, who were to be my companions upon the mighty ocean, set out from Philadelphia in order to em­bark at Chester, in company with many friends, and called for me at my house in Derby, being the direct road. Myself, [Page 73] and a considerable number of friends and neighbours joined them, and proceeded to Chester that night; where, at the house of our ancient friend Grace Lloyd, we had a solemn meeting. Next day, being the 1st of the 10th month, about two o'clock in the afternoon, we took leave of friends in great love and tenderness, and went on board the ship, which fell down the river that evening a little lower than Newcastle. Next day in the evening, we came to an anchor near Reedy-Island, where we were detained by a great storm of wind and rain until the 5th in the morning, when we set sail with a fair wind, taking our depar­ture from the Capes of the Delaware about six the same evening. The wind continued fair for the most part, though very strong, and a following sea running exceeding high until the 18th; when, according to their calculation, we had run about two-thirds of our passage; seldom having more than a foresail set, and that sometimes reefed, and at other times double reefed. As we had such a high following sea, it was thought the ship was a-head of their reckoning. From the 18th to the 23d the wind con­tinued pretty fair, but more moderate than before. Then it turned about to the east­ward and blew exceeding hard, with a very high sea, until the 29th, in which time we lay to, and drove about withersoever the wind and waves could carry us. We could [Page 74] get very little or nothing forward, but were exceedingly tossed. This was indeed a very trying time; the motion of the waves was so violent, that though she was a strong new ship, she was beat upon with so much force as to make her crack from end to end in a shocking manner, as if she would have been broken to pieces. I then thought those in my situation had good reason to know well what they were about, and what they exposed themselves to such dangers for; that they had great need to have the mighty Ruler of the sea and land for their friend. For if he had been pleased to withdraw his protection, there was only about a two-inch plank between us and eternity, which was to me very awful at that time to think of; for I was not without my tossings and combats of mind, at times, during these out­ward probations. The 29th proved a fine day, so that they had a good observation, and judged we were then about an hundred and fifty leagues from the Land's-End of England. Next day, being the 30th of the 10th month, Thomas Gawthrop having had a very restless painful night, by troublesome dreams, &c. had some expectation of our being taken (as he afterwards intimated) he stepped upon deck about eight o'clock in the morning, and immediately espied a sail upon our windward quarter, giving us chace. He quickly raised the careless captain, who ought to have been looking out before [Page 75] that time, and to have watched more nar­rowly than he did, considering the trust re­posed in him. The captain, when he per­ceived we were chased, appeared much con­cerned, giving the ship up for taken in his mind already. We urged him to put out all the sail he could croud, and to exert his utmost endeavour to escape, offering to assist all in our power, as we often had done before, being very poorly manned; in part owing to the sailors unwillingness to go into ships bound to London, lest they should be pressed on board men of war. It happened to be a moderate wind, so that we could have borne all the sail belonging to the ship; but through neglect before, neither topgallant-sails nor steering-sails were in a condition to be set; neither would the captain be prevailed upon to have a reef taken out of the mainsail. The vessel was very badly steered, as the French remarked when they had taken us. The captain ordered her to be close hauled to the wind, vainly hoping, as he intimated, we should get to the windward of them, being deeply laden. But this was very ill judged, if really the effect of judgment, as the way of the ship was thereby much hindered to what it would have been if she had gone large, taking the strength of the wind. Notwithstanding this, we held the privateer in chase about nine hours. She came up with us about five o'clock in [Page 76] the evening, and fired a gun under French colours; upon which our people lowered their colours and topsail, by way of sub­mitting to them. They hoisted out a small boat to sea, the sea running high, in which came the second captain and a lieutenant with seven or eight sailors, to take possession of a very valuable prize. She was a snow privateer belonging to Bayonne, carrying ten carriage guns, and about one hundred men, commanded by one Peter Garalon. As the boat was rowing towards us, the people therein made such a dark, mean, and contemptible appearance, that our poor sailors cried out in a very mournful affect­ing manner, We shall all be used very bad and cruelly, like dogs, for they are a piti­ful crew, and no officer amongst them: but in this they were mistaken. For my part, the Lord being exceeding gracious to my soul, by the blessed support and solacing comfort of his holy spirit, all that day I was quite calm and easy: all fear of the enemy or whatever I might have to pass through in such a time of trial, was wholly taken away for the present; my mind being filled with humble resignation to the divine will; yet was willing, as I thought it a point of prudence, to use endeavours for escaping out of their hand if it were prac­ticable.

The before-mentioned second captain of the privateer, whose name was Andrew De [Page 77] St. Andrew, boarded us with a naked cutlass in his hand, eight or nine men following him. He spoke to us in good English very chearfully, saying to this effect, 'Your servant gentlemen; it is the fortune of the war, although it is ours to day, it may be yours to-morrow; and promised good usage. He then ordered the captain, mate, and sailors, except two, and we who were cabin passengers, being ten in number, to go on board the privateer; upon which the boat was loaded and went off. He took notice that we were of the people called Quakers; by which he gave us to understand that he was not altogether a stranger to us as a peo­ple. The chief reason of sending away those on board a prize being for their own security, lest there might be danger of their rising and recovering the ship again, we conceived some hopes, from the known peaceable principles we profess, to be so far indulged as to have remained on board the prize; and therefore did not incline to go with the first boat-full; making use of that space of time in an earnest solicitation to remain there, having much better accommodation than we could reason­ably expect on board the privateer; but all the arguments we could advance seemed ineffectual. When the boat returned, he still urged the orders he had from the head captain to send us all on board: upon which I stepped over the side of the vessel, [Page 78] taking hold of the hand-rope, with a design to go into the boat: when there, it ap­peared to me exceedingly hazardous, the sea running very high. I turned about and looked this French captain full in the face, and expressed myself in as moving terms as I was capable of, concerning the danger he was about exposing us to unnecessarily; which, through divine favour, took such impression upon him, that he took me by the hand and drew me into the ship again, saying, You shall stay here to night how­ever. He had before demanded the keys of our chests, under pretence it was to prevent their falling into the hands of the common men, whereby they might plunder our chests; but the true reason was, that he and the other officers might do it themselves first; which they did after we were gone to-bed that night, returning our keys next morning, with large promises of protection and good usage; which, every thing con­sidered, they in a good degree fulfil [...]d. We could not help looking upon it as a kind providence, which made way for our remaining on board the prize; having there the free use of our private stores, and being better waited upon than before we were taken, having two cabin boys for that pur­pose. Captain Andrew, to give him his due, carried himself respectfully to us; fre­quently filling our plates plentifully, though he might, at times, have less left for him­self; [Page 79] and when he wanted any liquors or other provisions out of our chests, he would ask us for them in a submissive man­ner, as if he had no authority to demand. This kind carriage of his gained much upon us, to place some confidence in him, which in the end he made use of to his own advantage, by craftily getting from us to the amount of about £ 200 sterling, the particulars of which would be too tedious to relate. After the French had got possession of our ship, they put her in a fine trim for sailing, so that it was plain she could outsail the privateer that took her by much. Captain Andrew informed us, we were, when they took us, about eighty leagues from Cape-Clear in Ireland, and about one hundred and twenty-five leagues from the Land's-End of England.

The next day came on board the chief captain, to examine the cargo, &c. He made this Andrew captain of the prize, of which we were glad, as he could speak English well, and from what we could conceive of him, there was reason to expert favourable usage under his care; which was also pro­mised us by the head captain. They found the cargo so valuable that it was concluded the privateer should keep us company, in order to convoy us safe to some port of France or Spain. Now having new masters, we had a new course to steer; but the wind set against us, blowing very hard and [Page 80] stormy. We lay to often, and were ex­ceedingly tossed for the most part, for about two weeks, and did not in that time think ourselves any nearer Bayonne than when we were taken. They wanted more prey, therefore espied and chased several vessels, who had the good success to get away from them. We were once chased ourselves, by a fine large ship; they took her to be an English man of war, and appeared to be greatly alarmed; but when she came up, they found her to be a privateer belonging to the town called St. Maloes, carrying twenty carriage guns and about three hun­dred men. We left the privateer that took us, a great way during this chace, our ship being fixed upon at a great distance, for the best booty.

It was the 22d of the 11th month before we saw any land, and when we did, they proved much mistaken, thinking themselves sixty or seventy leagues nearer Bayonne than they, upon better information, found. We had pleasant sailing near the land on the Spanish Coast which borders on the Bay of Biscay; it being high land, afforded con­siderable delight to us, as we had been long confined to the sight of water only. The 24th in the dusk of the evening, we had near entered the port called St. Sebastian, when the wind chopped in right a-head and drove us out to sea again. The pri­vateer got into a place called Port-Passage, [Page 81] about a league from thence, next morning early. But we, being forced farther off by contrary winds, had great difficulty to get in that day, being for many hours towed by fifteen boats, in which were one hundred and fifty men labouring at their oars. They appeared very anxious to get our vessel into some port, as they feared some English ship cruizing in the Bay, might call them to an account. We poor captives went on shore the 26th in the morning, being glad and thankful to have the opportunity of setting our feet again on firm land, although in an enemy's country; for, setting aside the great affliction of being taken by an enemy, it had been an exceeding rough boisterous trying passage, of about eight weeks. It was very mild spring-like weather there, though about the middle of winter. We diverted ourselves with walking about in the day, and lodged aboard at night, whilst we staid in that small place, which was till the 29th, when horses were pro­vided for us to travel by land, about thirty miles, to Bayonne; the doctor of the pri­vateer being all the guard and guide we had. There was a very plentiful dinner provided for us at a sea-port town in France called St. Jean-de-Luz. I was not at all pleased with the forward wanton car­riage of the women; such as I had never seen before: I reproved them, but some, by way of excuse, said, the principal [Page 82] thing they intended thereby, was to cheer up our spirits in our captivated state; yet I could hardly believe their design was so innocent.

We had been told by Captain Andrew, that on our arrival at Bayonne, we that were cabin-passengers should immediately have a parole of honour granted us; but we did not find it so. Being brought be­fore the commissary, he ordered us to be taken into the castle; yet we had the liber­ty there to hire rooms, with beds in them (such as they were,) and to have provisions for our money; of which we soon found we had need to be well stored, as they had a notable knack of getting it from us; for we could not buy any thing ourselves, but all must come through the hands of such as knew how to make a property of us. I never knew any people so thorough­ly furnished with artful ways to get money, as the French. Their tongues were very much at command, and they could use them with great wit and address in order to gain our good opinion of them, but I never perceived they meant any thing else in the main thereby, but advantage to themselves; and therefore, saw it necessary to be as much as I could on my guard. We were very much imposed upon on account of provisions, and our money went very fast. Not being quite without fear, if they should discover we had sufficient, some other [Page 83] way might be found out to get it from us, we made inquiry whether any could be found willing to supply us with money, and take our draught upon Lon­don, allowing them a premium. We soon found they were very willing to do it, merely upon the credit of our society; such reputation hath the real possession of truth gained our friends, far and wide; but, to our sorrow, the bare profession of it, in divers mournful instances of late, hath produced quite the contrary effect; so that there hath been reason to fear, the great credit gained by our worthy pre­decessors for justice and punctuality, is in danger of being, in some measure, lost to the society, by the misconduct of some of their descendants. They told us, that di­vers of the people called Quakers had been amongst them, but they were not like us; that they looked upon us to be precise stiff Quakers; but those who had been there before, behaved in a complaisant man­ner, not sticking at the punctilio of the hat, &c. We let them know, that our be­haviour in those respects, was no other than what is consistent with our principles; that we could not answer for those who were hypocrites, professing one thing and prac­tising another. We could discover, that upon all occasions, they seemed to have a greater dependance on our veracity, than that of the rest of our company; and upon [Page 84] the whole, shewed us full as much, if not more kindness. Our confinement and usage in the castle grew very disagreeable to us; we therefore took the opportunity, when the commissary came (which we understood was usually once a week) to lay before him the treatment we met with, and to request our liberty upon parole. He pretended to make some difficulty of it, and we found many then in the castle had been endeavour­ing some time to procure that liberty and could not. But when we discovered danger of being put off, as they had been, we press­ed it upon him with more earnestness. Hereupon we had a parole of honour granted for upwards of twenty. The place fixed upon for our residence was Dax, an ancient town about forty miles up Bayonne River. We were sent thi­ther by water, and were in the boat all night, having very disagreeable company, the worst of whom were English and Scotch. These had laid a scheme to pre­vent our being admitted into the same boat, which was very ungrateful in them, as they knew we had been the principal instru­ments of procuring that liberty, especially for some of them. Without doubt, their reason for that attempt was, that they might enjoy the intended frolick, without any rebuke or interruption from us. We bore their filthy obscene discourse and behaviour [Page 85] for some time; but, at length, being exceed­ingly burdened, Thomas Gawthrop and I were concerned to reprove them very severely, desiring them to consider, what the French people in the boat could think of those who called themselves Protestants. Some of them seemed at first to retort, but the weight of our spirits came over them; we being on truth's side, which is strongest of all, they were soon overcome and silenced. From that time we kept them at a distance, not look­ing upon them worthy of our notice in a way of intimacy, so that when we came to Dax, we separated from them, boarding by ourselves. On our arrival there, we were brought before the governor of the castle; and our manner of appearing before our superiors being different from that of others, with which we did not expect he was acquainted, and might probably put an unfavourable construction upon; we there­fore desired our interpreter to inform him, that we did not stand before him covered in contempt, or any ways in disrespect, it being our principle and practice so to ap­pear before our superiors in our own nation. His answer was to this effect, viz. 'I am not at all offended with their appearance; I know something of those people.' He gave us the liberty of the town and country around; and we got pretty good quarters, [Page 86] and lived much more to our minds than in Bayonne Castle.

This town is now a mean place, but there are still remains of its ancient great­ness. I find by history, it was once the capital of Aquitaine, and was then called Aqua Solis, from its hot waters. At one place I found the heat so surprizingly great, that I could not bear my fingers in the water a quarter of a minute. This water was inclosed with stone walls of about twenty yards square, having brass or iron cocks or spouts, to convey water for the use of the inhabitants; it answering the purpose of boiling water for washing linen, &c. There arises a steam or smoke therefrom, like unto a vast furnace or lime-kiln. We being there in Lent-time (as they call it) were told the priests were uneasy at our being indulged with flesh, and that they requested the governor to give orders for preventing it. We were informed that he turned very short upon them, and said, 'I will give no such orders. What have they to do with your Lent? Cannot you be contented to keep it yourselves?' He carried himself very civilly to us, and came once in person to invite us to a bull-bating, offering, as we were strangers, to prefer us to the best place for the purpose of seeing, which was the balcony in the front of his house. We acknowledged his civility, but at the same [Page 87] time gave him to understand, we did not allow ourselves to attend such kind of diversions. I understood they bait bulls there with men instead of dogs; but I did not see it.

There are many worship-houses, and two nunneries in Dax. Their clergy, of vari­ous orders, swarm like locusts, who fleece the people to that degree, that it may be truly said, of much the greater part, they are in a state of abject poverty and vassal-age; stupidly devoted to follow these blind guides withersoever they think proper to lead them, not daring to judge at all for themselves in matters of religion. Oh, happy England! Oh, land blessed with liberty! What hast thou not to answer for, if right use be not made of so great a privilege?

We went one day to visit and converse with the nuns, which we did through large iron grates, by an interpreter. They beha­ved themselves very civil, courteous, and free in discourse. One of the sisters lay dead in an apartment. The corpse was laid in a coffin dressed in black, having twelve wax candles lighted and set in silver can­dlesticks, six on each side, and some at her feet, and a black cross fixed between her fingers on her breast, as if she was look­ing at it. Several of the nuns were about her, some kneeling, and others sitting on [Page 88] the floor, with books in their hands, pray­ing for the soul departed, as we conjectured. One was ringing a bell, perhaps it was what they call a holy bell, that at the sound thereof all the evil spirits might be chased out of the soul's way in its flight towards the other world. We went from this to the other nunnery, but could not be imme­diately admitted to see the nuns, as they were employed in singing psalms or some kind of religious songs, which we could hear at a considerable distance: it was thought by some of the company, the finest musick they ever heard; but I neither am, nor desire to be, a judge thereof. We stood in an open entry before a fine chapel, but did not go into it, though the door was open; for indeed I had no freedom to go into any of their idols temples, yet we could see many upon their knees praying, some before one image, and some before ano­ther. As we waited here, not intending nor expecting to give any offence, it being an open entry (but I suppose it was hal­lowed, or consecrated, as they call it, though not discovered to be so by us,) there came a monk to us in a great passion, and talked very fast in French. We saw he was angry, but did not understand what he said, and therefore asked the interpreters, hav­ing, I think, two with us then. They told us, he said we had polluted that holy place, [Page 89] viz. in keeping our hats on, inasmuch as their Lord God was there; that if we had no more manners, they had a way to teach us better. We then departed, being depri­ved of the intended visit to the nuns, but that was no great disappointment. Their crosses, either of wood or stone, are very numerous, being erected in all the cross roads, and also at many places in and about their towns and villages; on some of which images are fastened, with an imitation of the crown of thorns, the reed, spear, and spunge. That the people's great poverty may more fully appear, I shall give a short description of the shoes most of them wear, who wear any sort: they are wholly made of wood, being hollowed out for the feet, except a piece of leather about three inches broad, across the instep. They appear very inconvenient to walk in, as they do not yield at all to the feet. I am persuaded there is not one in sixty, in that part of France, who wear any other sort of shoes. Many waggon loads of these shoes are brought to Dax market every week.

The 21st of the 12th month, a messen­ger from Bayonne brought us the agreeable news of a cartel-ship from England being arrived at Port-Passage. An order came soon after for our return, and that we might be ready to embark therein the 24th. We hired a boat for that purpose, and went [Page 90] in her to Bayonne, being on the water all night. It was very cold snowy weather, and I suffered much thereby, taking a great cold, which I did not get over for many days. What still added to our distress, was the commissary's receiving us very roughly, and ordering us into the castle again. I know of no reason he had for being in that ill-natured disposition; neither do I re­member he gave us any. I was ready to imagine it was only to furnish a pretence to get something into his own pocket by our confinement. One thing made me think he had a feeling in the profits there, was his unwillingness to give us and others, a parole. However, when it appeared that we must go to prison again, the captain of the before-mentioned cartel ship being present, demanded our liberty; which I suppose the commissary durst not deny him; by which means we had the liberty of the town a few days, until matters were settled for our travelling to­wards the ship.

One thing I am not willing to omit, as it will be a specimen of the unaccount­able superstition and idolatry of those peo­ple amongst whom our lot was cast, Tho­mas Gawthrop and I taking a walk, as we often did, into the fields, came to a small building, which was somewhat in the na­ture of a conduit, as there issued out at one [Page 91] end, spouts of water, over which was enclo­sed, in net-work, an image whose head seemed as if cut off or severed from his body. It appeared to be a fine spring of water; but that which came most under our no­tice was, to observe so many worshipping this water and beheaded image: I suppose not less than fifteen on their knees, some much nearer thereunto than others. We inquired the meaning thereof; but none understood English, nor we French enough to converse one with another; so that we still remained in the dark, until by mak­ing inquiry in the town, we received the following account, viz. that it is St. Leon's well, who is the titular saint of Bayonne. That this Leon was the first gospel missio­nary sent thither in the pagan times, and that he was greatly persecuted by them, and last of all beheaded on a hill above that place where the well now is. That when his head was severed from his body it rolled down the hill and fell upon this place, upon which there immediately issued out a spring or fountain of water. That it is now the constant practice of confes­sors to send people to do penance at St. Leon's well; who must fix themselves on their knees nearer or farther off according to the nature of their crimes.

When our captain had fully settled things with the commissary relative to us, we [Page 92] proceeded on our way towards the ship as far as the town called St. Jean-de-Luz, where we abode some time, taking up our quarters at a large inn. One day when at dinner we received a visit from two friars, one of whom being an Irishman could speak English well; the other had very little English. We understood the design of their coming was to use endeavours in their pretended catholick spirit, for our conversion, by bringing us into the bosom of their church, out of which, they say, there is no salvation. This Irish friar soon began to ask questions, which, for a little while, several of us answered; but the dis­pute seemed too much in a promiscuous and scattered way, which was not quite satis­factory; neither did it appear altogether fair for so many to engage with one; for the other friar could be of little use in argument, as he had not the language. I therefore finding my mind pretty much opened and warmly engaged, entered into a close dispute with him, which my com­panions observing, left it to us. I soon found that his main support in argument was the authority and infallibility of their church, but more especially of the Pope; I therefore told him it was altogether fruit­less to support arguments against me, by an authority I had no faith in; but seeing he and I both allowed the holy scriptures to be of divine authority, it would be much [Page 93] better for us to back our arguments by that authority only. It was exceeding diffi­cult to bring him to this, as I believe he clearly foresaw I should there be too many for him: which fell out accordingly, to that degree (the Lord being near, opening my understanding) that the poor man was so confounded he knew not what to answer, nor how to support an argument thereby; his memory scarce serving him to quote one scripture passage truly. This I some­times helped him in, repeating the pas­sages he aimed at, to see what use he could make of them; but I found him as deficient in applying, as he was in remem­bering the holy scriptures; which induced me to think that even their clergy, so cal­led, find those sacred writings make so little for the support of their religion, that they do not much regard them. The dis­pute continued most of the afternoon; in which I must say he carried himself with good nature and civility, at least in ap­pearance. He would sometimes express his wonder at my memory; saying, he thought I could repeat all the scriptures by heart from the beginning of Genesis to the end of the Revelations. But I knew who graciously helped me; for I did not go against him in my own strength, the Lord being with me in such a manner that I thought I should not have been afraid to have engaged with an hundred of their [Page 94] most crafty priests; and therefore I did, and do offer the thanksgiving and praise to him alone who is eternally worthy! Towards the conclusion he asked me what I thought of their eucharist. I felt (as I thought) a snare in his question, where­upon I asked him whether he intended to ensnare me by that question; which he did not offer to deny. I was, however, en­abled to answer him in such a manner as that he could take no advantage thereof, to bring me into trouble. I often cried unto the Lord to preserve us in maintaining our testimony, agreeably to what he knew was right in his sight; and at the same time to be exceeding watchful over our own spirits, lest they should be too much heated and raised in a false zeal, with indignation against the detestable idolatry and abominations of those dark countries, that we might not thereby imprudently put ourselves into their power; not doubting if the Lord required any service of us amongst them, he would support us therein, for he hath all power in heaven and earth. The friars took their leave of us in the evening, signifying they would visit us again; but they never did, nor I hardly believe they intended it.

From this place we went into that part of Spain where we first landed, and staid there and at Sebastian several weeks for the cartel ship's sailing. The Spaniards are much more disagreeable to live amongst than the [Page 95] French. The men appeared to us in a general way, poor, proud, and exceeding lazy; filled with high conceits of them­selves, both in a civil and religious sense. They sauntered about, walking with their cloaks over their shoulders, looking upon us with contempt, as we neither could bow to their pride nor to their religion; nor could we look upon them in a favourable light, when we observed what slaves they made of their wives and of the women in general, who are employed in all or most of the drudgery, even in rowing their boats. I have seen near the two last mentioned places in their ferries, and other business on the water, to speak within compass, more than a hundred women thus employed; and scarcely a man is seen to touch an oar, unless he goes a fishing; and then his wife, or some woman, must bring his cloak or sword to the water-side against he comes on shore, and carry the fish home on her head, while he walks in state to the town. This one of the friends who were with me assured me he saw. I am far from envying our English women their happiness; I think such indulgent usage is due to the tenderness of their sex every where; yet I think that were they to see even what I have seen, as above hinted, they would be very thankful to the Author of their being for casting their lots in England, or the En­glish dominions. And indeed, considering [Page 96] some difficulties the sex labours under, which the men are exempt from, such as child-bearing, nursing, &c. which render them very unsuitable for such laborious em­ployment, it discovers great cruelty in the men to impose it upon them.

The darkness of popery seems greater here than in France; although it may be seen and felt there beyond all expressions. Oh the pain and distress of soul I was almost continually under by the muddy rivers of Babylon in those lands of darkness! the harp being indeed, as it were, hung upon the willows. No sweet melody nor song of Zion could be echoed forth (the Lord know­eth) under the power of the king of the bottomless-pit, who rules in the mystery of iniquity. Yet so it must remain, until that Almighty arm of power that cut Rahab and wounded the dragon, is pleased to arise and put on strength, that he may turn and overturn; pouring forth the phials of his wrath upon the seat of the beast and false prophet, thereby making the scarlet whore of Babylon desolate, and burning her flesh with fire; that the nations may no more be intoxicated with the abominations of the wine of her fornications ^*. May the Lord, for his oppressed seed's sake, hasten that day, so that the people and saints of the Most High may obtain the kingdom, [Page 97] and the earth enjoy her sabbath, when sweet incense in every place on the Lord's foot­stool may be offered up to him with gra­cious acceptance ^*.

I took notice of Port-Passage that a per­son went about the street every evening tinkling a hand-bell, as if he had some­thing to sell, yet I could not see any thing he had, which made me ask the reason of it: I had told, that it was to remind peo­ple of the souls in purgatory, that they might pray for them. The maid of the house where we boarded brought a crucifix, desiring us to kiss it; which some of the English then present did, to please her; but upon my refusal, and withal giving her a gentle rebuke for offering me such an affront, she alarmed the house with com­plaints what a bad Christian I was for refusing to embrace that piece of brass. Having soon after to pass through an en­try, I found two men, I suppose lying in wait for me. One of them came slily be­hind my back, laying fast hold of both my arms, in order to confine me, whilst the other brought the image to my face; intending, no doubt, to force me into that which they could not bring me voluntarily into. I soon perceived what they were about, and presently freed myself from their (to me) very odious design; shewing them, by a stern countenance, and some sharp ex­pressions, [Page 98] that I was much displeased with their uncivil treatment.

I cannot fully account for the cause, but whilst in Spain, I felt at times, or at least I thought so, something like snares laid to do us mischief. However that was, the Lord graciously preserved us, and gave abi­lity to maintain our testimony, as far as he was pleased to require of us in those coun­tries; which was chiefly in feeling the dis­tressing weight of death and darkness that covers the holy seed sown in the hearts of mankind, and which is pressed down by their superstition, idolatry, and wickedness ‘as a cart is pressed that is full of sheaves.’ It as surely groans for deliverance as Israel did under Egyptian bondage. In sympathy therewith (as I take it) my soul was most­ly in deep anxiety; being, as it were, dumb with silence, and closed up in pain­ful death and darkness; ready at times to say, Surely I am in the same spirit with them. But the material difference was this; it was their element, wherein they lievd plea­santly and delighted to breathe; whereas I could neither live nor breathe therein; so far from it that I often looked upon my­self in a manner quite dead. But let ever­lasting praise ascend to the God of the living, world without end! He was plea­sed to bring me through this horrible death and darkness, to enjoy the glorious day of his salvation again, and to be one of those, [Page 99] though unworthy, who have "the lamb slain from the foundation of the world" for their light and leader. Then I saw that even in that day of uncommon trials both with­in and without, my life was sure (though not discerned by me,) being hid with Christ in God.

It was some time after my arrival in Eng­land before the thick darkness before-mentioned quite wore off my mind; yet I was favoured, at times, with the shining of the Sun of Righteousness, as it were break­ing through a thick cloud, to my unspeak­able joy and comfort, and I believe in the work of the gospel, to the great satis­faction of many others, to whom I was, through deep suffering, in some degree qualified to speak, even as deep calleth unto deep.

We arrived in England, and came to an anchor in Torbay, the 26th of the 1st month, 1748, after a passage of five days. The ship was bound for Plymouth, but the sailors who had been prisoners in France, being in fear of another confinement by being pressed on board of the men of war, took the command of her from the captain, by something, in appearance at least, like force. He told them he had a safe pro­tection from the government, whereby they would be secured from what they feared by going to Plymouth. But they did not regard that, neither was he, as we thought, [Page 100] averse to going into Torbay, as he had the sailors to lay it on; for we had reason to apprehend he did not keep us waiting in Spain so long for nothing; so that the Bay might suit his purpose better also. It being the 1st day of the week, in the evening, when we came to an anchor, Thomas Gaw­throp and I had a great mind to go on shore, that we might endeavour to find a meet­ing of friends. Next day some of the com­pany signifying their intention of going about midnight, that being the time when I suppose the tide would serve best; we therefore requested they would call us, which they did. The ship lay a consider­able distance from the town of Bricksham, where we intended to land. We had been in the boat but a little while, when a great storm of wind and rain beat furiously against us, so that the men at the oars found it hard to keep the boat up against it. We encouraged them all in our power to work for their own lives and ours, let­ting them know, if they would bring us safe to land, they should be well rewarded for their pains. The danger of being dri­ven back to sea was very apparent, and I believe much feared by all in the boat. The poor men exerted their utmost en­deavour, which, through the good provi­dence of God, proved successful in bring­ing us safe to land. This I looked upon as a merciful preservation, having seldom, [Page 101] if ever, in the course of my life, appre­hended greater danger. We were exceed­ingly wet with the rain, but having good fires made for us, and other necessary ac­commodations, did not suffer much there­by. By enquiry, we found there was a meeting of our friends held near a place called Newton-Bushel, about ten miles off, to which we went, being truly thankful for the great favour of a safe arrival in Eng­land, and the opportunity of sitting down in a meeting of friends again; though we did hold meetings amongst ourselves in our captivity, on first-days, when it ap­peared practicable. This meeting was but small, and the life of religion seemed to me at a low ebb. I had nothing to deliver unto them by way of testimony. Friends were very loving to us. On second-day we proceeded towards London, as far as Exeter, where friends entertained us kindly that night. Next day Thomas Gawthrop, Isaac Greenleaf, and myself (leaving our ancient friend Peter Davis with friends there) hired horses as far as Honiton. There I bought a good serviceable mare, that carried me safe and well through most of my travels this journey in England and Wales. We took Bridgport in our way, and lodged with our worthy friend Samuel Bownas, who, with his house-keeper, en­tertained us with affectionate kindness. Now did we begin to enjoy the sweetness [Page 102] of brotherly love again. The quarterly-meeting for Dorsetshire was held next day at that place, to which we went. It was very small, and the power of truth which is the crown of all our religious meetings, as I thought was very low therein. We must live in that power at other times, if we ex­pect its gracious assistance in the weighty affairs of the church when met for the ma­nagement thereof; for that which is born of the flesh is but flesh, and cannot enter into the kingdom of God, nor so much as see it. All is certainly of the flesh that hath its principal delight and satisfaction in sublunary things. So that, although some may maintain the character of God's peo­ple as to the outward appearance, yet if the love of earthly things hath the chief room in their hearts, the love of the Father is not in them; and therefore such are not qualified to do God's work. Church-govern­ment, according to the discipline he in his wisdom hath established, requires our under­standings to be divinely enlightened to move rightly therein; but when any speak and act in the same natural reason and under­standing whereby they manage their outward affairs, which although capable of the one, is altogether unfit for the other; for "the world by wisdom knows not God," conse­quently these are not likely to understand his work; but in their pretended endeavours to promote, they mar it, and frequently darken [Page 103] counsel by a multitude of words without right knowledge. Instead of raising life in a meeting, they bring death and darkness over it, to the great pain of the upright-hearted, who are not always ready (like those above hinted at) but experimentally know­ing their sufficiency for every good word and work to be of God, they dare not move until it please him, by moving upon their hearts, to open their understandings and to be a spirit of judgment unto them: in this only, there is binding and loosing, remitting and retaining, with divine ap­probation; which is livingly known and sealed upon the understanding of the faith­ful, by the holy spirit of promise. Our way was quite shut up as to ministry or other publick service in that meeting. After which we pursued our journey for London. But I found constant riding very painful, not only because I had not rode much for a considerable time, but having, accord­ing to the custom of America, been used to an easy pacer. My mare now being a trotter, was hard to bear until I was more accustomed thereunto, which then proved very agreeable. Our friend John Hunt and his wife met us on 7th day at Staines, and being in a coach, prevailed on me, as I was weary with riding, to go with them there­into, and took me to their house, where I was kindly entertained, not only that time of my stay in the city, but also at divers [Page 104] other times during my travels in this na­tion. I continued about two weeks in the city, visiting meetings as they fell in course, being mostly low and pretty much discou­raged in my mind with a deep sense of mine own weakness, the greatness of the work which was before me, and the mourn­ful state of the church, as it appeared to me, in London. I had but little openness as to ministry, yet endeavoured to wade along as patiently as I could; it appearing to be my principal business then to suf­fer with the oppressed seed, mourning with a sensible remnant, who I could perceive had sackcloth underneath, for the preva­lence of worldly wisdom and grandeur in that great city; the little low meek thing, which by the power of God was exalted amongst us in the early time of our being a people, was in too general a way over­looked and disregarded; and man's will and wisdom taking its place, was grown very high, assumed the government in a large degree, where the wisdom of God for­merly bore rule. But this did not prosper; instead thereof, greater waste and desolation prevailed. The breathing panting babes after heavenly substance were greatly dis­couraged, being ready to say, All is gone! The glory is departed from Israel! What can be done now? But I saw they were to be raised in the Lord's time, as an army to fight his battles against the uncircumcised [Page 105] in heart and ears; and that the victory over that spirit was to be obtained through sufferings. Thus I have given a short hint of the afflicting view I had of the state of our society in the city of London; which place I shall leave for the present; as I shall, in the course of this journal, have occasion, divers times, to make some far­ther observations thereon, which may tend to explain the above.

I had an ancient mother in Radnorshire, South Wales, whom I had not seen for about twenty-two years. I therefore pur­posed taking meetings in my way thither, and also in my return to London yearly-meeting. I set out in order to be at Reading quarterly-meeting the 16th of the 2d month, which I attended to good satisfaction. After this meeting I took the following in my way, viz. Henley, Warborough, Witney, Gloucester, and Ross. The Lord being my gracious helper, either to do or suffer, in which I endeavoured to be faithful, according to the discovery I received of the divine will. The 26th I got to my mother's house, having sent a messenger a little before, lest a sudden sur­prise, although arising from much joy, might prove too great a shock for my dear ancient mother to bear without some in­conveniency. I suppose our meeting might somewhat resemble that of Jacob and his son Joseph's. It doubtless afforded much [Page 106] comfort to my worthy mother, she being a valuable religious woman, not only to see me again, but also that I was come upon a service she so greatly loved and valued. My honoured father had then been dead about three years. I had a brother and sister then living with my mother, and another sister married, who lived not far from her. I staid thereabouts somewhat more than two weeks; in which time I had divers very large, and some very open precious meetings; many of other societies flocking to them, who seemed much reach­ed by the testimony of truth. But alas! I found things very low there, as to friends, which was cause of sorrow to my mind. Wrong things creeping in, and very few if any, who had judgment and courage enough to deal plainly with disorderly walkers. I was at their monthly meet­ing, and endeavoured to stir them up to a more diligent and zealous exercise of whole­some discipline; but they appeared weak. On 2d day, the 16th of the 3d month, I took leave of my dear mother, brother, and sisters, and set out in order to be at the yearly-meeting in London, Edward Jones bearing me company. I took the follow­ing meetings in my way, viz. Ammelly, Leominster, a quarterly held at Broomsgrove, Worcester, Evesham, Shipston; on first-day had two meetings, at Lonycompton in the morning and Chippingnorton in the after­noon; [Page 107] then to High Wickham, Chesham, and Uxbridge. I had divers open satisfac­tory meetings, and some very trying and afflicting. The Lord was pleased to be my help and support, to whom be humble thanksgivings for his gracious condescen­sion to the low estate of his poor servants.

I got to London on the 7th day of the week, and the day following attended Grace-church-street and Devonshire-House meet­ings; but I had very little openness there­in. My spirit was very low and greatly depressed, so that I seemed to myself near fainting under the weight of my burden, which was very great. On 2d day the yearly-meeting began. The first was a meeting of ministers and elders in the morn­ing. Many brethren were met from divers parts of the nation. Amongst whom, I looked upon myself as a mere child, hav­ing much fear and reasoning in my mind lest I should dishonour the great master's cause, and discover my great weakness (as the same appeared in my own view) to those pillars in the church and experien­ced servants in the Lord's work. But he in great mercy condescended to my very low estate, and regarded my humble breathings, giving me the word of life to preach with demonstration that day, which much opened my way in the minds of friends, and was of considerable advantage to me in my fu­ture service; for very much depends on our [Page 108] having good place in the hearts of the faith­ful, and that cannot well be until they know us. Christian prudence teacheth not to lay hands suddenly on any; therefore such must see and feel the spirits one of another, in some degree, before they can unite. Was there not great care and caution in this re­spect, gross hypocrisy, by putting on the out­ward appearance, might be encouraged, which would be a very grievous wound to God's cause? Many friends after this meet­ing shewed affectionate regard to me; but none more than that substantial minister of the gospel Samuel Bownas. It had a pro­per effect upon my mind, to strengthen it, and raise humble acknowledgements to the Lord for his mercy herein. It being my fervent prayer, that whatever I might go through on account of the unfaithful, my service and labours might be acceptable to the saints, and that I might be favoured with a sense of the unity and help of their spirits accompanying me therein. I at­tended the yearly-meeting constantly, both the meetings for worship and discipline as they fell in course. The power and virtue of truth was near, to the strengthen­ing and comforting our spirits in a good degree: but I have known a much fuller enjoyment and overshadowing thereof, even when all the hills and mountains have been melted as it were, before him who is glorious in holiness, and fearful in praise, [Page 109] working wonders for the help and preser­vation of his people. O then we could ex­perimentally say, the Lord of awful majesty presideth amongst us, being a spirit of judgment to them that sit in judgment, and all we stand in need of; even as a place of broad rivers and streams, where nothing of man's invention could obtain any place! These were times of rejoicing in the pre­sence of the Lord, and drinking freely of the wine and milk, without money and without price. O how hath my soul said, it is good to be here! Having a desire, with Peter, to tabernacle there; much dreading to descend into this vale of tears again, where I must struggle with my many in­firmities, which I did not then much feel: but I do not instance this with design to justify those anxious fears and taking thought for the time to come; but rather as a mark of my great weakness and want of growth in the most precious faith, which is the saints victory, whereby, as we grow therein, strength and patience is received, to endure hardness as good soldiers of Jesus Christ; not viewing with much anxious fear these light afflictions, which are but for a moment; seeing, in due time, if we are properly exercised thereby, they will work for us a far more exceeding and eter­nal weight of glory.

On the sixth-day of the next week after the yearly-meeting, I set out in order to [Page 110] be at the three eastern yearly-meetings, being accompanied by my friends John Hunt and his wife, and Christopher Wilson who was to be my companion. We lodged that night at Brentwood; next morning early we passed on to Chelmsford, (the weather being extremely hot,) and breakfasted at my dear friend Frances Wyatt's, who after­wards, through the kind providence of God, became my truly affectionate wife. Divers friends went forward towards Col­chester, but my companion and I staid at Chelmsford meetings on first-day. The weather continuing very hot, I think then equal in heat to our weather in America, there arose a storm of thunder and rain in the time of the meeting: one clap of thun­der, whilst I was upon my feet, so terrified friends as to take away their attention for the present, and I expected to have been obliged to sit down; but waiting a short time, friends recovered, and I went on. A boy was killed thereby, as he was playing near Springfield steeple-house, about a mile from Chelmsford. We went after meeting to Kelvedon, and next morning were ac­companied by several friends towards Col­chester; but I was so extremely ill of a fever, that I was obliged to alight at Lex­ton, about a mile from the said place. We mounted our horses again after I had re­covered a little; but before we had pro­ceeded on the way above half a mile, there [Page 111] came on such terrible thunder, as is seldom known in this part of the world. The lightning appeared to glide in streams of fire on the surface of the earth a considera­ble way, and there seemed, as I thought, a strong smell of sulphur. The thunder frighted my mare to such a degree, that I being poorly, could scarcely sit her; but through mercy I received no hurt. I con­tinued ill at Colchester, so that I did not attend many of the meetings. The yearly-meeting ended there on fourth-day. On the sixth-day following, I was so recovered as to ride in a chaise to Maningtree, and had a meeting there the same day. On seventh-day we went through Ipswich to Wood­bridge, in order to attend the yearly and quarterly meetings there for the county of Suffolk. We were at their meeting on first-day; on second-day was held their meeting for discipline, wherein the power and virtue of truth seemed to me low and depressed; and, although I was fully per­suaded there were divers living, concerned members therein, who had the cause of truth at heart, yet they appeared also de­pressed. The chief reason whereof I then ap­prehended and have more clearly seen since, was giving too much place to a few busy forward members, in whom man's will and wisdom was too much exalted, who assumed the rule and government of that meeting; which they were too much indulged in [Page 112] by the cowardice of those whose proper business it was to work for God; that by his blessing and assistance, they might exalt the weight and authority of truth over such spirits. For the dominion and ma­jesty of truth in a meeting soon foils and overcomes them, as it is abode in by the heirs thereof; but if they are slack and negligent in possessing their right, usur­pers will often take it from them, in this sense. So that such who are called to work for God in his church, by holding back more than is meet, not only bring poverty and leanness upon their own souls thereby, but also open a door for the spirit of anti­christ to enter in. I have often seen, that when the wise woman neglects to build the house, the foolish woman, by pretending to build, hath pulled it down with her own hands: this hath been no small cause of the waste and desolation in some places. I have had much labour with that busy active forward spirit since, both in meet­ings and in private plain-dealing, as also in stirring up and encouraging the right minded to stand their ground; which I hope hath not been altogether without some good effect. I could not well be easy to proceed without making the above remarks, as a caution to such into whose hands this may come, since it is no small thing to be guilty of negligence in the work of God, nor to engage therein without a proper qua­lification. [Page 113] Meetings for worship were held on third and fourth days, wherein we were favoured with a good degree of that hea­venly virtue, in which there is renewal of strength and comfortable fellowship one with another. From thence we proceeded towards Norwich, taking Brandiston and Layston meetings in our way; where true religion appeared to be mournfully low. At Norwich we were favoured with con­siderable openness and satisfaction in their meetings on first-day. The quarterly and yearly meetings for the county of Norfolk were held on second, third, and fourth days. Divine goodness was felt assisting in close exercise and labour, for the help and recovery of a declined people; and heavenly fellowship sweetly enjoyed with those who preferred the prosperity of the city of God to their chiefest joy. On fifth day we had a meeting at Wymondham, wherein we were opened in gospel service, to our com­fort and relief in a good degree. Next day we had a meeting at Tasborough, which was a very painful trying time; my duty therein was to set an example of silence. Here my agreeable companion and I parted. He had been with me ever since I left London. I was now alone, as to any con­stant companion, and on the first-day fol­lowing attended Norwich meeting to pretty good satisfaction; and had the following meetings appointed in my way to Lynn [Page 114] viz. Lammas, North Walsam, Holt, and Wells; in most of which I had close laborious service: being led, as was often my lot, to stir up and awaken (if pos­sible) careless lukewarm professors. Our friend Edmund Peckover accompanied me to Lynn, where we had two meetings on first day; they proved very painful and laborious: I had very little openness as to ministry. From thence we went to Wis­beach, which was a small meeting, and things appeared very low. The next meet­ing we had was at Gedney, things being also very low. From thence we went to Spald­ing, and had a heavy laborious meeting: here my friend Edmund Peckover left me and returned home. The same day was a considerable eclipse of the sun. The next meeting I had was at Broughton, which was very painful and afflicting. The great loss some in that part of Lincolnshire (through which I passed) have sustained, by forsaking the fountain of living water and the commonwealth of our Israel, that they might embrace this present world, Demas-like, was sorrowfully felt: although some of them might retain the outward form, yet having lost the dew of their youth, they were become dry and formal: by whose means, and the undue liberties indulged in too many of the youth, a thick darkness was raised that might be felt; which did, in a sorrowful degree, tend to eclipse the [Page 115] beauty of our Sion. I travelled from thence through Newark, and a considerable way by the pleasant river Trent, to Nottingham. Being first-day, I was at the meetings there both fore and afternoon. Truth greatly favoured in opening doctrine and counsel in the morning; the afternoon not quite so open, but in a good degree to satisfaction. From thence to Oxon meeting, which was small yet open. From thence to Mans­field, and had a painful trying meeting there. The next was at Chesterfield, where the meeting was but small, yet truth livingly favoured, opening counsel for our help and encouragement in the way of well doing. Notice being previously given, I had a large meeting at Matlock on first-day. There were a few friends, and many others at this meeting, which proved heavy and laborious for some time; yet divine goodness afforded ability to work through, and the holy power of God was in a good degree exalted; praises to his name for ever! The next meeting I had was at Hansworthwood-House on the borders of Yorkshire. There were but few friends, and of those few, most of them seemed to depend too much upon the labour of the ministers, as is sorrowfully the case in too many other places. I had nothing to administer unto them but an example of silence, that ap­pearing best adapted to their states; for unless the great benefit thereof is experien­ced, [Page 116] there can be no real advancement in true religion. I went from thence to Shef­field, which was a large meeting, and the doctrine of truth was largely and livingly opened therein; I believe to general satis­faction, and to the comfort of the upright-hearted. From thence I went to Highflats, and was at their meeting on first-day, which was very large; being composed of plain country friends. The Lord was plea­sed to favour us with a precious oppor­tunity together, in the comfortable enjoy­ment of his love shed abroad; under which holy influence, the doctrine of truth was largely opened; the glorious powerful name of the Lord was magnified, and his hum­ble, dependant children were encouraged to serve him with a perfect heart and with a willing mind. The next meeting I had was at Brighouse, which was to pretty good satisfaction; truth owning and comforting our spirits therein. Next day I had a very painful afflicting meeting at Halifax, hav­ing reason to fear but few of the members were rightly acquainted with the quickening virtue of true religion in themselves: when this is the sorrowful case, it makes heavy work for painful travellers. My la­bour amongst them was in a close rousing way, but it did not appear to have much impression. From thence to Gildersome, where I had a pretty open comfortable meeting; and next day one at Leeds to [Page 117] satisfaction. This being a large meeting. I staid over first-day, and am pursuaded there was a sensible weighty body of friends belonging thereunto; yet there seemed to me a much larger, as to num­ber, who contented themselves in the pro­fession of truth, and in hearing the report of others concerning the heavenly coun­try. The indifference of these, together with their eagerness after words, appeared to me a cause of painful anxiety of spirit in that meeting, which I had to suffer under both morning and afternoon. Here my friends John Hunt and his wife from London met me, with intent to accom­pany me to some meetings in that county, of which I was glad, being alone, often low and much discouraged in mind, in a deep feeling of mine own weakness; as also having to wade from place to place, in a painful sense of a greatly declined people whom I was concerned to labour amongst; so that, had not divine goodness at times made me sensible his everlasting arm was underneath, to support my afflicted soul in various probations, I had certainly faint­ed. But, blessed be his holy name forever, he was often graciously pleased to open a way for me to hold on, when I could see none, leading me by the hand like a tender merciful father, one step after another; and giving me more place in the love and regard of his people than I looked for, or [Page 118] could, as I thought, reasonably expect. I was many times greatly abased in mine own sight; ready to say, to what good purpose do I visit the churches? for I seem to move in an untrodden path, as under the weight of the hills and mountains of exalted un­fruitfulness; and often, as it were, groping in the chambers of death, with such con­stant afflicting views, that I was ready to say with the prophet, ‘I am a man of un­clean lips, and I dwell amongst a people of unclean lips;’ but the live coal from the holy altar, soon removes all that tincture or seeming defilement, which doth not proceed from our own sins and miscarriages, but from those of others. Thou deep wader for the good of souls, this is wrote prin­cipally for thy sake, that thou mayst see others have gone the same way before thee, and be encouraged so as not to sink under thy burden. I found in the Lord's time (as thou wilt, if thou patiently holds on thy way) that tribulation worketh patience, and patience experience, and experience hope. The Lord gave me thereby clearly to see, I must thus feel the wounds, bruises, and putrifying sores of the sons and daugh­ters of Sion, or I could not speak to their states and conditions feelingly and effec­tually for their help and recovery. Our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ was touched with a feeling of our infirmities. He bore the weight and painful sense of the sins [Page 119] of the whole world, tasting death for every man; whereby he reached forth a merci­ful hand of help and salvation for the re­covery of all, sufficient for all who be­lieve in him and obey him; and his faith­ful messengers must know, in degree, a drinking of the same cup, and being bap­tized with the same baptism he was bap­tized with, not only on their own accounts, but also on the account of others. He still suffers by his spirit, as under the weight and oppression of sin and iniquity, in the hearts of the children of men; so that all those who are one in spirit with him, must in measure feel his sufferings, and sympathize with him therein; travel­ling in pain, that Christ may be formed in the hearts of mankind, ruling in his king­dom on earth, as he rules in heaven. But these things are too mysterious for the wise and prudent of this world to under­stand, being only revealed to those who are indeed born of God.

We staid at Leeds until fifth-day, there being a burial, attended by a large number of friends and others. Truth opened our way in the ministry to good satisfaction. Next day we had a small meeting at Knares­borough, where we found things very low. From thence we went to Thirsk, and on first-day had a precious open meeting there, in which the testimony of truth was greatly exalted, and the upright-hearted sweetly [Page 120] comforted. The praise of all belongs to the giver of every good and perfect gift. Next day we went to visit our ancient honourable friend John Richardson, at his house near Hutton in the Hole. He had scarcely sight enough to distinguish us one from the other. We were received and entertained by him with true love and bro­therly affection. He was much at liberty in his spirit, and very free in discourse about religious things, in which his life and great delight appeared to be. He shewed us (in manuscript) a journal of his life and travels in the service of the gospel, since published, wherein are many very useful observations and remarkable occur­rences, which I hope will be of great ser­vice in the world. On third-day we had a meeting at Hutton, wherein we were fa­voured with some degree of openness; yet truth did not raise to any considerable de­gree of dominion: but all is best as the Lord is pleased to order, for from him alone proceed the issues of life. On fourth-day morning we took leave of our said worthy friend in much affection, and had a small meeting at Bilsdale: things were low as to the life of religion in that meeting; after which I parted with my friends John Hunt and his wife. John Scot of Leeds continued with me, who was an honest labourer for the arising of life in meetings, and I thought of consi­derable [Page 121] help to me. The next meeting we had was at North Allerton; which was ra­ther low and heavy to wade through. We went from thence to Darlington in the county of Durham. I had close painful labour there; earthly-mindedness in pro­fessors is often the cause of such hard work, as it obstructs the current of life, both in themselves and also frequently in our religious meetings, like the Philistines stopping up the wells which the true seed hath opened in the hearts of believers; so that many times, instead of their having to sing, Spring up, O well, and we will sing unto thee! there is mourning and painful labour in sympathy therewith, to have them opened again, that the flock of Christ's fold may all be watered with the refreshing streams of that river which flows from the presence of God. The next meeting I went to was Raby, being on a first-day; it was a large heavenly meeting, truth having great dominion, and friends were sweetly comforted together. At Bishop Auckland, the Lord favoured with matter and utter­ance to a considerable degree of ease and satisfaction. From thence I went to the city of Durham, and had a hard painful meeting in silence; also at Newcastle we had a close, trying, laborious meeting; occasioned, as I apprehended, by undue liberties in thinking and acting, which had raised darkness to be felt in that meet­ing. [Page 122] We had an open comfortable meeting the next day at Shields. We went to Sunderland, and attended their meetings on first-day: that in the morning was very open and satisfactory, the testimony of truth going forth freely to the several states of those present, who were much affected therewith. In the afternoon it was a heavy afflicting meeting; but little felt of that which crowned the meeting in the morn­ing. We often find afternoon meetings are the most heavy and painful, occasioned, no doubt (in part at least) by answering the cravings of nature to the full; whereas they should be denied a full gratification, as little sustenance would, for that short space of time, answer much better, and be no injury to the constitution. If any think this hint, by way of caution, impertinent, there is reason to doubt, that they are yet too much strangers to the nature of true wor­ship and the many impediments in the way of its due performance; what I have above-mentioned is none of the least. I was quite shut up as to ministry in the after­noon. Here I met my valuable friends Jonathan and Margaret Raine of Trawden in Lancashire, being the first time I saw them; concerning whom, more hereafter. On second-day we had another meeting in the city of Durham, wherein the Lord was graciously pleased to exalt his glorious and powerful name over all disorderly and cor­rupt [Page 123] libertine spirits; there being some such in the meeting, which was evident to me, from the main scope of the testimony I had to deliver amongst them. It was with remarkable authority and sharpness against such, who having departed from the divine light, wherewith all mankind are enlight­ened, choosing rather to be in darkness, were so lost in a maze of error, as even to call in question the truths of the Chris­tian religion. I was afterwards informed that there were some such in that meeting who had imbibed the dark and wicked principle of deism, or free-thinking, so cal­led; but I had no outward information concerning the state of any there before the meeting, which I always carefully shunned. The next meeting I had was at Stockton, to pretty good satisfaction, as truth opened my way to discharge the service required; yet the meeting was small, and things ap­peared low, as to the life of religion. I went from thence to Yarum in Yorkshire; had a meeting there, and at Yatten, and Moorsham, to a good degree of satisfaction. The next meeting I had was at Castleton. The two last named were on the Moors, amongst a very plain people, who appeared to be in a low station of life, but I found the savour and virtue of truth amongst them, especially at the latter; to which that sub­stantial minister of the gospel Luke Cock, did in his life-time belong: the remem­brance [Page 124] of whom, although I never person­nally knew him, was very fresh and living­ly before me in that meeting, as if his spirit had been present; I could, as I thought, perceive the good effects of that worthy man's Christian labours amongst those peo­ple; and a precious meeting the Lord favoured us with together: to whom, for the multitude of his mercies bestowed upon us, poor unworthy helpless creatures, be humble thanksgiving and praise, now and for evermore. Whitby was the next meet­ing I attended, being on first-day, where I had very close laborious work. An earth­ly lofty spirit had taken too much place in some of the professors; the tendency where­of is, by darkening the understanding, and blinding the judgment, to account various weighty branches of our Christian testimony small trifling things. Here the flesh, that warreth against the spirit, having the as­cendency, its language is quite opposite thereunto. The flesh saith, there is little in dress; religion doth not consist in apparel; there is little in language; there is little in paying tythes &c. to the priests; there is little in carrying guns in our ships, to de­fend ourselves in case we are attacked by an enemy. To which, I think, it may be safely added, there is little or nothing in people, who plead as above hinted, pretend­ing to be of our society; for if they can easily let fall the before-mentioned branches [Page 125] of our Christian testimony, I am fully per­suaded, they will maintain the others no longer than they apprehend it will suit with their temporal interest. I have often wondered why such continue to profess with us at all. They are not really of us who are not concerned to maintain those principles and testimonies the Lord hath given us to bear. I was, through mercy, enabled to discharge the service required of me, and went from thence to Scarborough, where the Lord, in gracious condescension, was pleased to open doctrine and counsel for their help; who appeared to me mostly low and weak, as to a real growth in true religion. From thence I went to Picker­ing, where the Lord gave us a very precious opportunity together, in the comfortable enjoyment of his power and refreshing presence; to the exaltation and renown of his great name, who is worthy for ever. Next day I had a meeting at Malton, being a close searching time; truth seemed at a low ebb there. The next meeting at Cransick was very small, but the Lord was pleased to own and comfort us toge­ther, affording counsel for their help and encouragement. I went from thence to Bridlington, and was at their meeting on first-day; it was small, and things very low amongst them, as to the life of religion. Oh how greatly is that, and many other meetings declined, both as to number and [Page 126] a lively experience of true religion: some friends informed me, as I remember, that they knew the time, when fourteen or fif­teen ministering friends belonged to that meeting; and now perhaps, not a much greater number of members of all sorts, belong to it. Once there was a wonderful time of gathering into the vineyard of Christ; but since, with sorrow and lamen­tation it may be said, there has been a losing, scattering, and dwindling away in many places; the principal occasion whereof seems to have been, an inordinate love for transitory enjoyments, lawful in themselves and places, but not to have the chief pos­session of the mind. When that becomes the sorrowful state of any, they cannot savour the things that be of God, but the things which be of men; and are of conse­quence deprived of that all-sufficient help, so to live and walk, as to answer the wit­ness of God in others; to train up their chil­dren in the nurture and admonition of the Lord; and to maintain the testimonies of truth with a convincing strength and efficacy. So that although the form is retained in a considerable degree by such, and they may also be fortified with arguments, to main­tain the consistency of our profession with the primitive plan laid down in holy writ, yet, wanting the salt of the kingdom in themselves, all their pretensions without it will prove nothing; yea, worse than no­thing; [Page 127] seeing, by how much more they have had the opportunity of knowing more than others, by so much their condemnation will be greater. Next day we had a small meeting at Hornsey, and from thence went to Oustwick, and had a large meeting, wherein truth favoured in opening doctrine largely, and to a considerable degree of satisfaction. The next meeting we had was at Hull, which was indeed a very pain­ful exercising time of silence, in a mournful sense of great declension. We find it re­corded in the holy scriptures, that we must enter the kingdom of heaven through many tribulations. It is indeed a very wonderful mercy, that such unworthy creatures as we are should be so highly favoured, as to be admitted thereinto on any terms. I have considered, that our afflictions in this day, both in the manner and cause, differ much from the trials of our worthy predecessors. Their bodies were frequently imprisoned, and grossly abused by people of different religious persuasions; but our spirits, when engaged in the work of the gospel, are often imprisoned, depressed, and greatly afflicted, by means of the great unfaithfulness of many under the same profession with our­selves; being at times, on account of such, so closed up in a painful sense of death and darkness, as to be somewhat like the pro­phet of old, quite shut up and dumb with silence. This may be occasioned by such, [Page 128] who are so far alienated from the sensible reaches of that measure of grace in their own minds, as not to be opened thereby to receive the word preached to advantage; (for the word goeth not forth in vain; but will accomplish that for which it is sent;) and it may also be necessary, on account of those who have often been comfortably re­freshed by sitting under a living ministry, yet neglecting their own duty in a spiritual labour for heavenly bread, look too much for food from the labour of others: which unjustifiable dependance and expec­tation, is often disappointed and mortified. The main design of gospel ministry, is to turn the children of men to the grace of God in themselves, which will teach them to work out their own salvation, and dili­gently to seek the Lord for themselves, in whom, their strength being renewed, their spirits would unite, and greatly help and relieve the ministers in their gospel-labours. From Hull I went to North Cave, where I had an open comfortable meeting. Thence to Howden, where the meeting was small and things very low; it was held in silence. I went next to Selby, and attended their meetings on first-day. I had some strength and openness for service in the morning; in the afternoon I had to sit in silence; I could find but very little of the life of religion there. Next day I had an open comfortable meeting at Rawcliff; thence at Pontefract, where [Page 129] things were low and painful. The next meet­ing was a small one at Wakefield, wherein I was quite closed up in silence; the state of the meeting, as I apprehended, requiring it. I went from thence to Leeds, and next day to the house of my esteemed friend William Hird, intending for Brad­ford monthly meeting, which was held on sixth-day, wherein I had thorough service, and the blessed truth had great dominion, to the joy and comfort of many hearts. I returned to Leeds, and attended their meet­ings on first-day. They were low and rather painful; my service therein was in a close searching way; but those who are at ease in Zion like smooth things best, and are almost ready to say now, as some did formerly to the seers, see not, and to the prophets, prophesy unto us smooth things. I went from Leeds to the quarterly-meet­ing at York, wherein I had considerable openness in service; yet my spirit was in­wardly and secretly pained most of the time; the cause whereof, as I apprehended, was the numbness and earthly-mindedness of many members of that very large assem­bly; in which there were, notwithstand­ing, a wise lively substantial body of friends; which, by account, hath continued in a suc­cession from the early times of our society. When this meeting was over, I set out, in company with several friends in their way home, in order to visit some meetings [Page 130] in the Dales, on my way to Kendal quar­terly-meeting; John Scott being also with me. The first meeting we had was at Bane-bridge in Wensley Dale, which was large, being on a first-day. It was a very close trying laborious meeting. I had very little to say by way of ministry, but suffered deep­ly in spirit, under a sorrowful sense of car­nality prevailing. Next day I had a very comfortable reviving meeting amongst a few plain friends in Grisdale. After which I went home with that plain faithful minis­ter of the gospel Alice Thistlethwaite, who had borne me company from York, to her house in Dent Dale, where we had a meet­ing next day, which I hope was in a good degree serviceable, although things were but low. After this we went to the house of that worthy elder and minister of the gospel James Wilson, near Brigflats, where, next day, the Lord was pleased to favour us with a powerful glorious meet­ing; so that we could thankfully witness truth was over all. Such thorough open meetings, but seldom fall to our lot in this declined state of things. Yet the Lord is all-sufficient for the help and support of his faithful servants, in all times and dis­pensations of his providence to mankind; so that we not only can say, sufficient to the day is the evil thereof; but also, suf­ficient to the day is the strength and wis­dom afforded for our assistance in the [Page 131] Lord's work. Next day I went to Ken­dal, being accompanied by the before­mentioned worthy friend, who entertained me on the road with divers very pleasing accounts concerning the spreading of truth in those parts, and the wonderful convince­ments thereabouts, by that memorable ser­vant of the Lord George Fox, which the said friend had heard related by eye-wit­nesses, who were themselves convinced at that time; this made the journey exceed­ing pleasant to me, nothing disagreeable therein, but its being too soon over, as that put an end to this delightful conversation.

There appeared to me a valuable body of friends in and about Kendal yet left, al­though divers in that town had been remo­ved by death but a little time before; the loss of whom was much lamented by the survivors, as they had been useful mem­bers in their day. It also appeared that good order was well maintained, and that excellent discipline established amongst us in the wisdom of truth, seemed to be as duly put in practice, as in most places I have observed amongst friends; yet my way was much closed up in suffering, du­ring the quarterly-meeting: I staid their meetings on first-day, and was largely open­ed in the morning, truth having great do­minion; but in the afternoon was shut up in silence. On third-day, being Winder­mere general meeting, I went to it; truth [Page 132] greatly overshadowed that large assembly, and the testimony thereof was much exalted, to the edification and sweet refreshment of the upright in heart, as well as deeply affecting the minds of many, I hope to their lasting advantage, who had taken more liberty than truth allows of. Next day I had a small meeting at Grayrig, where things were low. At Preston the Lord was pleased to favour us with an open comfortable meeting, and truth's testimony was exalted. After which I went to Kendal, and had a very comfortable meeting amongst friends there. From thence I went to Swarthmoor, and was at their meeting on a first-day, in a meeting-house built near the hall, by George Fox; I could not discover much lively sense of true religion there, it being a time of painful suffering silence. From thence to the Hight meeting, which was to pretty good satisfaction; and thence to Hawkshead; the meeting there was low and afflicting. My principal service was to give an example of silence, which frequently fell to my lot; the Lord favouring with resignation to his divine will. Next day I had a small open satisfactory meeting at Keswick; and went to Isel meeting; but had nothing to deliver by way of testimony, being wholly shut up. From thence to Pardshaw, which, I think, is the largest country meeting in England, and friends there generally made a plain becoming ap­pearance, [Page 133] much resembling many meetings in Pennsylvania, both for largeness and other­wise; the view whereof gave me singular pleasure, and abundantly the more, as the great master of our assemblies was graciously pleased to honour and comfort us with his living presence, in which there is fulness of joy: matter and utterance was given by him to a discharge of duty, in which there was peace. I had an open satisfactory meeting in the evening, at my friend and old com­panion Christopher Wilson's. Next day I had a meeting at Whitehaven. Thence to Broughton, where I had a meeting. I en­deavoured to lean upon the Lord alone, for guidance in my service, and by him was frequently much opened, in the states of meetings and individuals present. The next meeting was at Cockermouth, which was to a good degree of satisfaction. Thence to Allonby, where truth favoured with a good degree of openness and peace. From thence I went to Holme, a meeting remarkable for having been, I suppose, more than sixty years interrupted, and grievously disturbed by a wicked unruly company of ranters. It began in some of the Pearsons, and when they were removed, others succeeded in the same spirit. Some of them were at the meeting when I was there. A woman of the party spoke several times in such ran­cour, that I do not remember ever to have taken notice of a voice so much tinctured [Page 134] with a dark diabolical spirit; but friends, in the blessed enjoyment of the powerful truth, were quite over it and them, and I believe, had therein been in a good degree preserved; as that meeting appeared to me the liveliest of any thereabouts, having, as I remember, five or six public friends belonging thereunto. The next meeting I had was a small one at Bolton; truth fa­voured with a comfortable degree of open­ness therein. Thence I went to Wigton, and attended both their meetings on first-day; it was an exceeding painful exercising time. My mouth was, as it were, closed up in mournful silence, yet not without a pretty clear view and sense of the sorrow­ful states of those amongst them who had been the principal cause of the death and misery which I felt; I saw what they were doing in the dark, as it were, through the hole in the wall. O! what a great snare bright genius, and extensive natural abilities are to some, when they are deluded by Satan to trust in them, and presumptuously to imagine, they are sufficient to answer every purpose for guidance and help not only in temporal but spiritual things, without super­natural and divine aid immediately commu­nicated. I have met with no state more at enmity, nor in greater opposition to the truth; nor from whose spirits more pain and distress is to be met with, than from these worldly wise and self-sufficient people, who, no doubt, [Page 135] would deride this observation, or any thing else that asserts an inward sense of things. They are very much out of the way of being reached unto and helped; therefore they are in great danger of being left alone, that they may wonder and perish. I sin­cerely wish, that the tender-hearted, both youth and others, may be preserved from the infection of that poison of asps which is under their tongues. Next day I had a poor small meeting at Kirkbright, where my business was to example them with silence. From thence to Moor-house, where I had some openness and satisfaction, though things were but low as to religion in that meeting. The next meeting was in the city of Carlisle; my way was closed up in painful silence. I had a small open meet­ing next day at Scotby; then went to a meeting at Sowport, where there were but few friends, and things very low amongst them, as to the life and sensible under­standing of religion; but there came in many of the neighbours, towards whom I found great openness to declare the truth, and it was a good meeting. I went next to Kirklington, or the border meeting, being on a first-day. Friends having without my knowledge, given notice to their neigh­bours, and to divers people of account in the world; it is likely they expected great things from one come so far to visit them; and some perhaps hoped to get credit by [Page 136] that day's work; but we see sometimes, when man appoints, the Lord disappoints; which in the issue, seems to have been the case here; as I sat the meeting, (which was very large) throughout in silence, to the great mortification of many present, some of whom, one might have expected from their appearance and pretensions, to have better understood the nature of spiritual worship, than to have been so anxious after words or outward declarations; it proved, I think, as painful and exercising a meet­ing as ever I knew, to which the expec­tations of friends and others did not a little contribute. At the conclusion, I was fully satisfied I had discharged the service requir­ed of me that day, in an example of silence, in which I had peace. I could perceive great uneasiness in many under our name, at the silence of the meeting. It evidently discovers a mournful degeneracy, seeing silent worship is so directly consistent with our Christian profession of the inward teachings of the grace of God that brings salvation, which hath appeared to all men, and teaches all those who diligently hearken thereunto, that no time is more suitable than when assembled together, unitedly to wait for this blessed teaching, and thereby, a renewal of our strength. How absurd then is it, for those who profess this teaching and access to the fountain of all good, to depart there­from and gaze at the clouds, or depend on [Page 137] the conduits and water-spouts, as if it was in their power to fill themselves, and so to supply all their wants? for although they have at times, by the Lord of all, been used as a means for our help and edification, yet such means or helps are not so essen­tially necessary to the spiritual worship pro­fessed by us as a people, but that it may be as effectually, and consequently as ac­ceptably performed without them, in an awful solemn silence: than which nothing can be more reaching and convincing to those in whom the divine witness is re­garded, and which may also tend greatly to raise that in the minds of such where it is depressed. Some have remarked, that those who have been convinced in the silence of our meetings, have generally stood their ground in religion best. The reason is plain, because they have at the very first laid hold of and embraced the very substance of religion; whereas, the understanding may be, in a great measure convinced by testi­mony, and the mind much tendered and affected with lively declarations of the truth; but all this goes off sooner, and will leave such minds destitute, unless they happily come to be fixed under the teachings of the grace of God in themselves, and have to sit under their own vine, and under their own fig-tree, where none can make them afraid. None need be ashamed of a solemn awful silence before God, and in the sight of men; [Page 138] seeking the Lord, who will be found of all such, and will, by his secret invisible power, vindicate that sort of silence in the hearts of all who suffer his pure witness to arise. All who reject the voice of this holy witness, may justly be disregarded by God's people, so as not to be discouraged by what they say on that account. But on the other hand, when any thing of this nature is done in the form and by way of imitation only, there being nothing super­natural to support and defend the same, it must necessarily fall under contempt, and like the salt that hath lost its savour, will be trodden under the feet of men. That scripture passage is very observable, where some undertook to cast out devils in the name of Jesus, whom Paul preached. It is plain the evil spirits knew, notwithstanding their pretences, that they wanted power to subject them; and therefore answered these imitators and pretenders, ‘Jesus I know, and Paul I know, but who are ye? and the man in whom the evil spirit was, leaped upon them, and prevailed against them, so that they fled out of the house naked and wounded.’ I instance this passage to shew how inefficacious imita­tion is: they would do well to consider this, who, upon a serious examination, do not find the Lord with them in their religious performances; for assuredly nothing can stand approved in his sight, nor maintain [Page 139] a dignity worthy of him, in this state of probation, but the real product of his own spirit in us; therefore, let all who profess spiritual worship, greatly dread being found in senseless stupid silence, although it be in the very same form the people of God have been, and are still led into; knowing, that the best and most consistent form is alto­gether contemptible without the heavenly power. I felt and perceived divers of them were much offended with me, for abiding in that station the Lord placed me in that day, which they did not altogether forbear letting me know by words; neither did I let them pass without some close remarks on their sorrowful state and great blindness. In about a week after, I received a long letter upon the subject, from one, setting forth amongst other things, how great a mystery it was to him, that a person in my station, travelling from one nation to ano­ther, should disappoint people, friends and others, by such unaccountable silence; had not I discovered sufficient cause to believe this friend was not then what he had been, his letter would have been as great a mystery to me as my silence in that meeting was to him. When I had perused the said letter, I was most easy to let it pass as not worth answering. This was a time of very great anxiety to my mind, and I have made the a­bove remarks thereon, as I felt my mind open­ed thereunto; for no reason, than as a [Page 140] caution or warning to all professors of the blessed truth into whose hands this may come, that they may watch and pray con­tinually; lest, by departing from the pure leadings of truth in themselves, they fall into the like absurdities; manifesting to others, that they are but mere pretenders to spiritual worship; and also for encou­ragement to painful travellers in the work of the gospel, whose lot, in the course of their service, may fall amongst such, to whom they may be as signs and gazing-stocks, because their time is not always ready. What makes such examples more necessary in some places, is the busy for­wardness of unskilful ministers amongst themselves, who may be too apt to feed the people with a multitude of words; per­haps frequently recommending silence in words, but not sufficiently by example. I have seen it much my place, especially at home, to shew friends by my example, the benefit and necessity of silence, and, as it were, to lead them into it. And as may be seen by this account, I many times found it my duty to sit meetings appointed for me in silence; (being at times greatly dis­tressed in a sense of the states of the people,) like a sign unto them, of what they ought to be more in the practice of. This indeed was no easy task to flesh, as the expectation of people was greatly towards me, being come from far to visit them; yet there was no [Page 141] remedy but patience and resignation to the divine will, without whose assistance, I knew it was in vain to attempt any thing by way of ministry. My way of travelling as above hinted, often silent, was looked upon then by many, as a strange and unusual thing; but some others have been led pretty much in the same track; however, I had mostly great peace, and inward strength to stand my ground therein, as all will who follow the Lord whithersoever he shall be pleased to lead them.

I had a meeting on third-day at the house of Cuthbert Wigham in Northumber­land, which was a sweet refreshing time, and tended much to strengthen and revive my drooping spirit. Next day I had a pretty open serviceable meeting at Allondale. From thence to Alstonmoor, where the Lord was pleased to favour me with a tho­rough rousing opportunity, and God's everlasting truth was exalted. The next meeting I had was at Penrith, where things appeared to me but low. I went from thence to Coldbeck, and was at their meeting on first-day. It was a very hard distressing time. There I felt, as I thought, some of those hard dark spirits, which had occa­sioned great anxiety at sundry places in that county; who might, as I apprehended, be compared to the bulls of Bashan that com­passed David about. It is likely they would [Page 142] scoff at the expression of their spirits being felt, but the time will soon overtake them wherein their spirits will feel, though now perhaps in a great measure past feeling. Next day I had a small but pretty open meeting at Massdale. From thence to Terril, where I had a good open satisfactory meeting, truth being exalted and friends comforted. The next meeting was Strick­land, which was but small yet to good satisfaction. I went from thence to Ken­dal, and attended their meetings on sixth-day, first-day, and third-day. Most of them were to me trying laborious meet­ings. I was not much opened as to mini­stry. Friends in many places had need to be brought from words, to the one eter­nal inspeaking word. On fourth-day at Yealand in Lancashire, I had a close search­ing meeting. The next day I was favoured with an open comfortable time at Wray meeting. From thence I went to Bentham, where truth assisted to discharge what I had before me, to a good degree of satisfac­tion. From thence to Settle, where on first-day we were favoured with a precious open meeting. The testimony of truth went forth freely and affectingly, to the tendering many hearts: Praises and thanks­giving to the Lord for the same. Next day I had a small but a very open meeting at Monybent. From thence to Soly meeting, which appeared to me in a very weak, low [Page 143] condition, as little of the life of religion was to be found therein. After meeting I went to the house of my kind friends Jonathan and Margaret Raine; and from thence to Marsden Height meeting, in which the Lord's power was livingly felt, whereby the testimony of truth was delivered with clearness and good demonstration. Next day had a meeting at Trawden. On first-day I went again to Marsden meeting, which was a thorough good opportunity, and we were sweetly comforted together.

Being now pretty much fatigued with constant travelling and close labour, I rested at Jonathan Raine's about a week, and then went to a large meeting of friends in Lathersdale, where I was much favoured, and largely opened to deliver the doctrines of truth, with good demonstration, and to my own peace. The next day I had a com­fortable open meeting at Airton; my friend Jonathan Raine bearing me company. From thence to Skipton, and had a meeting; things were but low. I had that evening a good open opportunity amongst our wor­thy friend David Hall's scholars. Thence I went and had a meeting at Fairfield, which was small, but pretty open and I hope ser­viceable. The next meeting was at Ne­thersdale, where I had very laborious search­ing work; the testimony was close and sharp against formal professors, yet, through divine favour, I was enabled to get through [Page 144] to very good satisfaction, and the meeting ended comfortably. I went from thence to Asquith, where was a small open meeting. The next meeting was at Rodan, and being on a first-day, it was very large: a plain solid body of friends belonged thereunto. We were favoured with an open meeting, the testimony of truth being exalted. Next day I had a very comfortable open meeting at Bradford, and went to Keighley, which was also an open satisfactory meeting. There I received from my worthy friend David Hall, by the hands of his wife, a truly sub­stantial and encouraging letter: as it con­tains matter of weighty instruction, I wil­lingly give it a place here, not doubting but it will be very agreeable to some read­ers, and think it cannot hurt any.

After this meeting, I went home with my companion Jonathan Raine, to Traw­den. From thence I went next day to Todmorden, and had a laborious exercise­ing meeting there; yet through the ex­tending of heavenly help, I was enabled to discharge the service required, to mine own ease and comfort in a good degree. I had a small poor meeting at Oldham next day; silent labour seemed to be my proper bu­siness therein. On first-day, the 25th of 10th month, I went to Croshawbooth in Rossendale, which was a pretty large meet­ing; but I was in so weak a state of body, being much spent with travelling and deep close labour, having for some time but a very poor appetite, that my spirits were greatly exhausted; so that finding my mind engaged in that meeting, I stood up in order to de­liver what seemed to be required, but was [Page 148] obliged soon to sit down again, being so very weak and spent I could not raise my voice, so as to be heard. I then concluded it was time to take some rest, in order to recover strength as formerly if it was the Lord's will, which I did not then much expect, thinking myself far gone; nor indeed did I desire it; for my afflictions, several ways, about that time were very heavy, which made me weary of this world, and had it been the Lord's will, should have been glad to have embraced death rather than life; yet I endeavoured to be resigned to the divine will. Great care was taken of me with affectionate kindness, by my worthy friends Jonathan Raine, his wife, and her sister Ann who then lived with them; having often the company of that valuable family, the Ec­royds of Edgend: I was brought very near these two families in that love that think­eth no evil; being by illness, or rather weakness, detained there about nine or ten weeks. It was an exceeding wet season; being also the dead of winter, yet I got mostly out to their meeting, which was near; and went divers times to Marsden-Height meeting, about four miles off; and once to Skipton, and Lotherdale, about eight or ten miles off: in most of which meetings the Lord was with me to my great comfort, enlarging my heart in ser­vice for him and his people, to my satis­faction [Page 149] and encouragement. As soon as I was pretty well recovered and the weather more fit to travel in, I set out for Lan­caster; my kind friend Jonathan Raine bearing me company; and attended both their meetings on first-day; being painful and laborious. I had nothing given me to deliver by way of public testimony; divers friends there appeared to me then, and more since, lively and sensible of the work of true religion; yet I apprehend, the expectations of too many were out after words that day, which was to be disappointed. O that all were really turned to the more sure word, that they might never be disappointed! I was next day at their monthly-meeting of business, which was low, truth not having much dominion therein. I went to Wyers­dale, and had a pretty open meeting; re­turned to Lancaster, where next day, we were through divine goodness, favoured with a heavenly baptizing meeting, to our great joy in reverent thankfulness; friends being sweetly united in the precious enjoy­ment of the pure love and goodness of God; having an additional confirmation, that when the Lord is pleased to shut, none can open, and when he is pleased to open, none can shut. As there had been very little openness at divers meetings there before, and at this the Lord opened places of broad rivers and streams, to the unspeak­able pleasure and refreshment of thirsty [Page 150] souls; in a sense thereof I took my leave of friends, being accompanied by my esteem­ed friends William Backhouse and Jona­than Raine. We had a pretty open com­fortable meeting at the Fylde. Next day had a thorough awakening opportunity at Freckleton, being enabled to divide the word with great plainness to their states; wherein I had ease and peace. We then went to Preston, where the number of friends was exceeding small, and but little to be felt of a spiritual travail or lively sense of religion amongst those few, there hav­ing been a mournful declension; yet I found the Lord's merciful loving-kindness gra­ciously extended towards them for their help and recovery. From Preston I went to the following meetings, viz. Cappul, Ashton, Bickerstaff, and Leverpool: in all which, the Lord was graciously pleased to afford wisdom and strength, to open doc­trine and counsel for the stirring up care­less lukewarm professors, as well as to the encouragement and edification of the sincere-hearted, also to mine own ease and peace in a good degree. I went from Lever­pool to the house of Gilbert Thompson, and was at Penketh meeting on first-day; where my spirit was deeply afflicted, under a sense of too many professors sitting down at ease, seeking to be fed with words and outward declarations concerning the things of God. I have found this much the [Page 151] case at some places where eminent in­struments have dwelt. Friends have suf­fered their minds to be too much drawn from a diligent spiritual labour, to receive the bread and water of life immediately from the fountain thereof; and depended upon the labour of such instruments who are but as clouds or water-spouts; having no power to fill themselves nor to feed the flock profitably, until furnished for that purpose, by the bounty of the inexhaustible treasury of wisdom and all-sufficiency. Here the fountain is forsaken for the stream's sake; the eye being more to the gift than the giver, which is an abuse of the gift, and provokes the Lord to jealousy; giving him just cause to withhold such instrumen­tal means from people. The reason of such a dangerous mistake, to me is obvious, viz. because it is found easier for flesh to receive by such a medium; ‘Let not God speak unto us, lest we die, said the people of Israel, but let Moses [the instrument] speak unto us.’ There is a life that ought to die on the cross, which is easier saved alive under testimonies be they ever so sub­stantial and excellent, than under the im­mediate teachings of Christ; whose voice is as a fire against evil of every kind, and affords no peace after it is discovered, until it be given up for destruction, and to be purged away by the spirit of judgment and burning. This pure voice speaks to us in [Page 152] such a manner, as that we can by no means turn it off from ourselves by applying it to the states of others; which may be done under the most searching testimonies; there being a partiality to ourselves, which, through the deceitfulness of the heart, we are but too apt to fall into; and also to flat­ter ourselves, by supposing the pleasure we take in hearing the doctrines of truth de­livered, arises from the good in us, when it may be no other than the state of those, to whom the prophet Ezekiel's words and declarations were as a lovely song, of one that hath a pleasant voice: for they heard his words, it seems, with pleasure, but did them not; their heart going still after their covetousness. I have lengthened this re­mark the more, because of the very hurt­ful consequences I often have seen and felt, by an over-anxiousness in people after out­ward declarations; even to the neglect of that great and necessary work, of drawing near to God with true hearts, in full as­surance of faith; wherein is our only safety and help. May this consideration deeply engage all minds to return unto him, the great shepherd of Israel, who puts his own sheep forth and goeth before them, lead­ing into green pastures, bringing them up from the washing-pool, bearing twins, none being barren amongst them. I found it my place to give that meeting an example of silence. From thence I went to their [Page 153] monthly-meeting at Hartshaw, wherein I sat a considerable time in silent waiting upon and seeking the Lord, who was pleased in his own time to open a living spring of ministry, and truth greatly pre­vailed, to the comfort and edification of friends: there being also divers not of our society present during the meeting for wor­ship, amongst whom one, who expressed a sense he had of an awful solemnity to be felt in the meeting before any words were uttered, which to him exceeded words or outward declarations, or to that effect: as a friend told me afterwards. This, doubtless, would be much more the case with many who at times come amongst us, were our religious meetings held more in the sen­sible feeling of the divine power. From thence I went to Manchester, and had a meeting there, which was low and afflict­ing. Some who should have been way-marks and leaders of the flock, not keep­ing their own spirits in due subjection to the peaceable spirit of truth, had not main­tained the unity thereof, which is the bond of peace: whereby that meeting was hurt and the pernicious effects thereof were pain­fully felt. I staid until their first-day meetings were over, where the Lord was pleased to afford sufficient ability to dis­charge the service required, to mine own ease and comfort, in a good degree. I went from thence to Stockport in Che­shire, [Page 154] and had an open comfortable meet­ing, to the reviving of those few who la­boured to keep their habitations in the truth, and warning of careless professors. I had next day a small poor meeting at Mac­clesfield. I went from thence to Morley, where, although the appearance of pro­fessors was large, yet very little to be felt of the life of religion amongst them; but instead thereof, a sense of death and dark­ness, occasioned by wrong things. I had no openness at that time to administer any thing, but an example of silence. I had a meeting next day at Frandley, where truth favoured with a degree of openness. I went from thence to Sutton, where things appeared low: I found it my place to sit the whole meeting in silence. The next meeting was at Newton, being on first-day, where I was favoured with a pretty thorough opportunity to clear myself. Then went to West-Chester; had a small meeting there in silence, and things appeared very low. The next day I had a good satisfac­tory meeting at Namptwich; and went to Middlewich, where I met our worthy friend Joshua Toft. The meeting was, through divine goodness extended for our help, to pretty good satisfaction. I went home with the above-mentioned friend, and had a meeting next day at Leek in Staffordshire: I sat the whole time in silence; friends ap­peared to me, in too general a way, at ease [Page 155] in an empty form of religion, depending on the labour of others. I went next day in company with Joshua Toft, to the burial of a friend at Stafford; there were but few of our society thereabout, but many others came, some of whom were very rude and noisy in the meeting. Our way was quite blocked up as to ministry. I returned with Joshua Toft and went to Leek meeting on first-day, wherein I had a thorough rousing opportunity; truth being exalted, and the great name of God magnified, who alone is worthy for ever. I went from thence in company with my dear friend Joshua Toft, to the quarterly-meeting for Cheshire, to be held at Middlewich: infinite kindness was greatly manifested at that meeting, for the benefit of friends in general and the en­couragement of the upright-hearted in par­ticular. Things respecting truth and friends being in the general, very low in that coun­ty; yet the Lord, in condescending kind­ness, extended his love for their revival and recovery. Here I found my mind engaged to visit Morley meeting again, the aforesaid friend joining me therein; and sending no­tice by some friends returning from the quar­terly-meeting; we had a very large meeting, composed of friends and others. I had tho­rough service therein; yet near the conclusion, not finding my mind clear of those under our profession, others were desired to withdraw, which they immediately did. Our labour [Page 156] was very close and searching amongst those under the profession of truth, things being much out of order; undue liberties having crept in. The Lord favoured me with wis­dom and strength, so to discharge myself of the service required, as to go away with a peaceful easy mind.

I have now to give an account of an un­expected turn I found in my mind, respect­ing the course I was to steer in my travels. When I left Lancaster I had no other view than to visit meetings agreeable to the foregoing account, and to proceed in a pretty direct course through the Midland counties towards London. But, very con­trary to my expectation, I found my way quite blocked up and stopped as to what is before hinted, and another opened before me, viz. To turn into Yorkshire again, and take meetings in my way to the quarterly-meeting there; from thence to Lancaster quarterly-meeting; and to the circular yearly-meeting for the northern counties, to be held that year at Kendal; after which, to cross the sea for Ireland. But O, the close exercise this unlooked-for turn brought upon my mind: not so much out of reluctance to obey the Lord's re­quiring, provided I was favoured with clear certainty thereof, as fears of being mistaken; and great reasonings there were in my weakness; yet through divine favour, [Page 157] I was enabled, in a good degree to go over them, and to yield obedience to that which I believed was required. I there­upon acquainted my friend William Back­house with the time I purposed going for Ireland, as he, when with me in the Fylde country of Lancashire, had signified his de­sire of bearing me company therein, when I found it my duty to undertake it; al­though neither he nor I thought then it would be so soon; however, I received his answer, that he intended to prepare against the time proposed, in order to bear me company. We went from this meeting to Lowlighton in Derbyshire, where we were favoured with a good open meeting, and so proceeded over the mountains of Der­byshire-Peak, to Sheffield in Yorkshire; where the Lord was pleased to give us a very gracious confirming meeting; truth and its testimony being greatly exalted. This blessed opportunity removed all my reasonings and fears before hinted; for which my soul was humbly thankful to the Lord, my alone helper. After this meeting my much esteemed friend Joshua Toft and I took leave of each other, he returning home. I went with our worthy friend John Haslam to his house at Hands­worth Woodhouse, where the next day I had a very open satisfactory meeting; the Lord affording doctrine and counsel suit­able to the states of those few belonging [Page 158] to that meeting. When at the house of my friend before-mentioned, my mind was touched with something like his bearing me company to York and from thence to Ken­dal yearly-meeting, which I informed him of; but he made very light of it, perhaps thinking my motive was only for the sake of having his company. I advised him to take with him such things as he might think necessary, in case he was to go; and if, when at York, he found no such con­cern, he might then return home. We set out together for York, taking meet­ings in our way, at Newel-Grange and Bar­ton, which were precious open times; the life and power of truth attending to our great comfort. We travelled on to Leeds, and lodged at our worthy friend Christiana Horne's, who in her time had been a suc­courer of many of the Lord's messengers, being a truly open-hearted woman, a mo­ther in our Israel. But she did not continue a great while in mutability after this. Next day we proceeded to York, and attended the quarterly-meeting; but cannot find any memorandum by me of its state, therefore have but little to say concerning it. I staid over their first-day meetings at York; they were hard and painful; I had nothing by way of testimony, save a little at one of them. My truly valuable friend John Haslam acquainted me, that what I had said to him at his own house, of bearing [Page 159] me company to Lancaster quarterly-meet­ing and the yearly-meeting at Kendal, had laid such close hold of his mind that he could not find freedom to leave me. He said I had, by those few expressions, although he did not much regard them at first, cast such a mantle over him, (or to that effect) that he found he must go with me, though not so well provided for the journey as he could desire. We went from York to our friend William Hird's, and from thence to David Hall's, and so to the monthly-meeting at Settle. In the after­noon the same day, we were at the burial of a friend there, which was an open satis­factory time, truth overshadowing the meet­ing, and the testimony thereof was exalted to our great comfort. Next day we had a pretty open comfortable meeting at Ben­tham, and went from thence to the house of our friend William Backhouse, who I expected to find prepared to go with me into Ireland; but to my no small surprize, I found he had reasoned it away, under an apprehension that his proposal of accompany­ing me proceeded more from his love to me than any real concern at that time. I was fully persuaded his concern was right, as he had acquainted me it had remained on his mind to visit Ireland again for some years: I therefore had a great travail in my mind for him, that he might be brought to a right sense and discerning of the Lord's re­quirings; [Page 160] being fully satisfied he was a man of sincerity, who would not wilfully trans­gress.

I took an opportunity with him next morning, and his concern returning, and he abiding steadily under the weight thereof, afterwards performed the said journey to his own peace, and was to me an agreeable friend and fellow-labourer. Having appointed to meet me at Whitehaven; we went from his house to Lancaster, and attended their meet­ings on first-day. In both which I found it my business to set an example of silence. I was taken suddenly that night after all were a bed, with an uncommon swelling in my throat, not much unlike a quinsey; I could scarcely swallow liquids for some time, so that it seemed very probable to those about me, that it would soon be over with me, as to this world. Concerning which, I was very easy in my mind. A doctor was quickly sent for; by whose care, under divine favour, I soon recovered, so as to attend the yearly-meeting at Kendal. It was very large, there being a great col­lection of friends from many parts, and large numbers of people of other societies. This meeting was divinely favoured, especially at the concluding meeting, wherein God's everlasting truth triumphed gloriously, and my poor depressed spirit, that had long waded under the weight of wrong things, was raised into comfortable dominion, and [Page 161] obtained, through the captain of our salva­tion, complete victory over those hard un­mortified spirits, undue liberties, and car­nal lifeless professors, I had long mourned under a painful sense of, in my northern travels; now I was set over them all, for I sensibly perceived, and livingly felt his eternal power set over all wrong spirits, and clearly saw the Lamb and his followers will obtain the victory: and although it hath been, is, and will be, through great suf­ferings; yet those who patiently suffer with Christ, shall also reign with him. This meeting crowned all my service in those parts; after which I found my mind quite at liberty to embark for Ireland. I set out next day for Whitehaven in company with my good friend Christopher Wilson; a very pleasant journey we had, in that sweet innocent freedom which cloathed our spirits, feeling the consolating streams of that river which maketh glad the city of God. Here we, in degree, enjoyed the new heavens and the new earth wherein dwelleth righteous­ness: the fruit and effect whereof is quiet­ness and assurance for ever. I was at Pard­shaw meeting, being on a first-day. It was a precious opportunity; truth was greatly in dominion and its testimony exalted, the sincere-hearted being sweetly comforted and united one to another. The next day I went to their monthly-meeting, and had good service, both in the meeting of wor­ship [Page 162] and that for transacting the affairs of the church. The weighty service of visit­ing families was before that meeting, and I understood had been sometime obstructed by some of the members, to the concern and uneasiness of others. It was clear to me, when it came to be weightily consider­ed, that the power and virtue of truth was livingly with the promoters of so good a work, and I did fully believe the Lord would bless it in their hands. I therefore endeavoured to sift the opposite side as well as I could, to the bottom, and found very little or no weight in what they had to offer against it. Upon which they were ear­nestly desired not to hinder the service of others, in that important work that had so often and so evidently been blessed, al­though they might be unwilling to put their own hands thereto. Truth arose and came over them, so that friends at that meeting appointed fifteen or sixteen men and women, to go in several companies on the service, as that monthly-meeting is large in its extent. This afforded great relief and satisfaction to the sincere travellers for Sion's prosperity. I went from thence accompanied by several friends, to White­haven, where I met my intended compa­nion William Backhouse; and a ship be­longing to a friend, whose name was James Nicholson, being ready to sail for Dublin, we went on board of her, the 19th [Page 163] of the 2d month, 1749, in the evening, and were soon under sail. We met with contrary winds, and a very rough uneasy pas­sage as to our bodies; being five days and as many nights before we landed. What made it much harder for William and me to bear, we had given up the beds prepar­ed for us to two women friends that came on board and were unprovided, they being also very sea-sick most of the time; so we were under a necessity of lying down on the cabin floor or upon some of the chests, in our cloaths, which we did not take off all the while, that I remember. This proved very trying and hard to us, and greatly spent and fatigued we were when we landed at Dublin: where we were re­ceived and entertained with affectionate kindness by our friend Samuel Judd and family, at whose house we lodged while in that city. The half year's meeting began in the morning of the day we landed, it being afternoon when we got on shore.

The next day we attended two meetings for the affairs of the church; and I am fully persuaded, there was a faithful exer­cised remnant, painfully labouring for the restoration of ancient beauty and comeliness, and the affairs of the church were trans­acted with very considerable order and decency; yet my spirit was, as it were, cloathed with deep mourning, and much closed up in painful anxiety. The cause [Page 164] whereof I did not then distinctly under­stand; but when I had travelled through the nation, visiting the churches, and sor­rowfully viewing the desolations thereof, my sufferings in spirit at the half year's meet­ing were no longer a mystery to me. The next morning was held a general large con­cluding meeting for worship and in the afternoon a meeting of ministers and elders; at both which, especially the latter, I had open thorough service; as also in their week-day meeting at Sycomore-alley on sixth-day. We staid at Dublin over first-day: at Meath-Street in the morning the Lord was pleased to furnish largely with matter and utterance, to a good degree of satisfaction. In the afternoon at Sycomore­alley, I found it my duty to be silent. On second-day we set out from Dublin, accompanied by James Evans and wife, in order to visit the following meetings in our way towards Cork, viz. Ballycane, Wick­low, Errats, Wrights, Cooladine, Wex­ford, Lambston, Ross, Waterford, Clon­mel, Kilcomon, Youghall, and so to Cork. We found things very low indeed in most of the said meetings; my labour in them was generally searching, painful, and labo­rious. Truth seldom having that comfort­able dominion (by reason of the prevalence of wrong things) as was earnestly laboured for, both by us, and also by a few mourn­ers scattered up and down in those parts, [Page 165] who waited for, and ardently sought the prosperity of Zion. Such can only rejoice when the righteous seed beareth rule. We had several meetings in the city of Cork, where there is a considerable body of friends, as to number. But oh! the love of this world and other undue liberties, hath pre­vailed, to the great hurt of the society there also. Our labour was for the most part, painful and exercising amongst them. From thence we went to Kilcomon again; so to Cashel, Limerick, Jonathan Barns's, and Birr. At several of which meetings I found it my place to example the people with silence, which was the case at Birr, having (as it was said) all the people called Methodists residing there, and their preacher at the meeting; than whom, I think no peo­ple are more at a loss what to do with silence in worship; I am persuaded there have been awakenings of merciful kindness to them, and they have seen the necessity of the new­birth; but their notions about it have been for the most part, in the airy visions, and flightiness of their own imaginations; not coming to cease from man, or from their own willings and runnings. Oh that they were so happy as to be emptied! that God might be all in all, working in them the will and the deed; then would they come really to experience true poverty of spirit, and to abhor forward active self, whose time is always ready. In this safe, self-denying [Page 166] situation, they would really feel an absolute necessity to wait, as with their mouths in the dust before the Lord, until he shall be pleased to arise in their hearts; whereby all his and their enemies would be scattered. Then would true worship be performed, and they established upon the immoveable rock that the gates of hell cannot prevail against. After Birr, we had meetings at the Moat, Old-Castle, Ballyhaise, Coothill, and Castleshane; which meetings were mostly small and painful; truth favoured with a degree of strength, to labour for their help and recovery; but, alas! the life of religion appeared to be at a very low ebb. The next meetings we had were at Bally­hagen and Charlemont, which were large, yet but little to be felt of the life of reli­gion moving or stirring in them; neither did there appear to be much soundness amongst some of the foremost rank; several of whom having administered cause of stumbling and discouragement to others, it had a bad favour and influence; instead of gathering, it had tended to scatter from the fold of Christ's flock. I had very close searching-work amongst them, in order to bring the judgment of truth over such, as the Lord was pleased to open my way and to discover their states to me, being altoge­ther without any outward information there­of. I understood afterwards some of them resented it, though they said nothing to [Page 167] me about it; but as some had before, so I understood one or more of them did soon after, manifest a base ungodly foundation. We proceeded from thence to take the meetings round Lough Neigh, viz. Tober­head, Colraine, Ballinacre, Grange, and Antrim; which meetings appeared indeed almost a desolation with respect to the sen­sible possession of truth, although it was professed by some. A time of deep mourn­ing and distress it was to my soul, to view their captivity and loss, which themselves did not seem to have much sense of. The next meeting was Ballinderry, being very large, but heavy and painful; yet the bles­sed power of truth prevailed in a good de­gree. From thence we went to the follow­ing places and had meetings, viz. Lisburn, Hilsborough, Lurgan, and Moyallan; where, although we found some true mourners in and for Zion, yet the bulk of the society seemed to love the world and the things that are therein, to that degree, as to have very little taste or relish for the things of God. Even some of those, who, by their stations in the church, ought to have been lively examples of self-denial in this respect, appeared to be as deeply plunged into this mournful cause of desolation as any. Alas! what account will they have to give of their stewardship, when the chief shepherd shall appear. From this place we crossed the country to Edenderry; once remarkable for [Page 168] a brave, lively body of friends: there are now a large number of professors belonging to it; but, alas! the glory is much depart­ed, and the fountain of living water forsa­ken by many. Oh, how are they gone into captivity by the muddy waters of Babylon! We attended their meeting on a first-day, but could hear no melody or song of Zion; all being closed up, and our harps hung, as it were, upon the willows. It was a time of deep silent mourning. About the time of breaking up that meeting, it livingly sprung in my mind, that as they had re­jected abundant favours bestowed upon them that they might be gathered to God, so the Lord would reject many of them. The next meetings we had, were at Timahoe, Rathagon, Mount Melick, Mountrath, Ballinakill, at James Hucheson's, Carlow, Kilconner, and the province meeting at Castle Dermot. Pain, distress, and close labour, either in testimony, or an example of silence, attended in the last-mentioned meetings; yet the Lord was a gracious sup­port through all. I hope our deep wadings and painful service, was not without some good effects, both to the stirring up the careless, and comforting the mourners in Zion. I had very close service at the pro­vince meeting; yet, by divine favour, was carried through to pretty good satisfaction, and I believe it was a serviceable meeting to many. From thence, in our way to Dub­lin, [Page 169] we had meetings at Athy, Ballytore, and Baltybois, which were very small, and true religion very low. From thence we went to Dublin, intending shortly to em­bark for England. We attended the meet­ings in the city, both on first and other days of the week during our stay, but I had very little openness therein; being made to the professors as a sign and example of silence from meeting to meeting. Great indeed were my inward distresses, on account of the mournful declension of the church in Ireland: the Lord knoweth, and was my only support under it. Blessed be his name for ever! Divers there were amongst them­selves, who greatly lamented it. The tra­vail of whose pained souls, I hope the Lord of sabbaths will regard in his own time, so as to turn his hand again upon a greatly declined church, that he may, by the spirit of judgment and burning, purely purge away her dross, take away her tin and reprobate silver; that her judges may be restored as at the first, and her counsellors as at the beginning.

It may by some be looked upon rather imprudent, to lay open the defection and spiritual condition or state of our society, which depends so much upon my own tes­timony of an inward sense given me thereof in my travels. In the first place, no other person can do it for me, and I cannot find my mind easy that it should be wholly [Page 170] omitted. It hath been so repeatedly, and with such clear evidence to my understand­ing confirmed, that I have not the least doubt of what I write in that respect; al­though it be with a considerable degree of reluctance, yet it seems my way, and I am not easy to go out of it; intending no other by those close remarks, than as lessons of instruction, caution, and warning to succeed­ing generations; if, when I am removed hence, this be looked upon worth printing. So far I may add, that the laying open the mournful declension of the society, and pointing out some of the causes thereof, as my understanding might be opened there­into, was one of the principal things that engaged me to write a journal: it never entering into my thought, that my tra­vels and little services, singly considered, were of such consequence as to merit the re­gard of my friends, so as to be published; but thinking the account of my travels and the observations of the state of things are necessarily connected together, so that in doing the first, I could not well avoid the last. I have further to add, that I think myself also warranted herein, by the exam­ple of God's faithful witnesses in ages past, with whom it was usual to lay open the states of the people, both in an individual manner and in a more collective body, viz. as nations, societies, or churches; also setting forth, for a warning to all succeed­ing [Page 171] generations, those particular evils which caused the Lord's displeasure, and would, if not turned from, bring down his judg­ments upon them. We also find, that even these warnings and heavy denunciations of judgment, were preserved in writing, as a testimony for God, and against themselves, even by those against whom they were really given forth; yea, the particular evils and frailties which, through inadvertency, the Lord's choice servants fell into, and deeply repented of, are recorded; not only as warnings to all, but also to excite charity and tenderness towards those who have fal­len into evil, in case they repent and for­sake; considering ourselves, that we may also be tempted, and therefore never dare upbraid those, who, through their own im­prudence, have fallen amongst thieves and are naked and wounded, provided they re­turn again to the father's house. I have just further to remark, that I have observed a prevailing disposition in some of considera­ble eminence in the society, and in a great many others, to cry up mightily for peace and charity, the maintenance of unity, and not to press any thing very closely, lest the peace of the society should thereby be endangered; although, perhaps, the things urged cannot well be objected to upon any other principle, than ground­less fears, and a faint-hearted mind not yet quite upright to God, nor wholly redeem­ed [Page 172] from the praise of men: as there is an unwillingness to displease them, though in maintaining the Lord's cause: ‘for if I yet pleased men (said Paul) I should not be the servant of Christ.’ What makes me take notice of this, is, that I have seen a great snare in it, wrong things suffered to remain and prevail under it, and the fire of primitive zeal against undue liberty, too much quenched. We have no such examples in the prophets, or in Christ and his apostles, of indulgence, and winking at wrong things, and false ease. They, in their concern to testify against such things, had no fear of breaking unity, nor disturbing the quiet and peace of any people, let their rank or station be what it may. Had this noble spirit of ancient zeal been more generally exercised in plain dealing and speaking the truth one to another, the mournful declen­sion so justly complained of amongst us as a people, would not have so generally prevailed. It is but about a century, since the Lord, by an out-stretched arm, gathered our society, as from the barren mountains and desolate hills of empty profession; choose­ing them for his own peculiar flock and family; as by many evident tokens of his love and mighty protection, doth fully ap­pear: even when the powers of the earth, like the raging waves of the sea, rose up against them, with full purpose to scatter and [Page 173] lay waste. This remarkable instance of his regard, must, I think, gain the assent of every considerate person, who hath not yet a capacity of understanding clearly the Lord's gracious dealings with his people, in a more spiritual and mysterious relation. When I view the multitude of his favours and blessings to them in this respect, I am afraid even to attempt the recounting and setting forth so copious and amazing a sub­ject, which can better be admired, and the bountiful author adored for the same. It may be justly queried, what could the Lord have done for us that he hath not done? Notwithstanding which, what indifference, lukewarmness, and insensibility as to the life of religion, is now to be found amongst numbers under our name; nay, in some places, this painful lethargy is become al­most general; although I hope a few may be excepted, who are much afflicted on that account, being exceedingly burdened with an earthly, carnal spirit. Oh! how doth covetousness which is idolatry, and an in­ordinate love of things, lawful in themselves and places, cloak, shelter, and hug them­selves, even under a plain appearance in some; yet plainness is no more to blame for that, than the name disciple or apostle was to blame, because Judas once bore that name. I could write much more on this mournful subject, having suffered so deeply in my travels on account of the grievous [Page 174] declension; but hope to ease my mind, by dropping here and there a remark, as I pro­ceed in giving account of my travels.

We embarked at Dublin the eighteenth of the 5th month in the morning, and landed at Peel near Swarthmoor-Hall next day. One thing I am not quite free to omit, as I could not well help looking upon it a providential preservation of my life, viz. the sands being very extensive there­about, and we happening rather too late, as to the time of tide-serving, to be set on shore, could not, by the waters leaving of us, bring the boat up so as to land in time. We were thus set fast, about half a mile from firm land. We could therefore think of no better way in this difficulty, than accepting the poor sailors assistance, which they kindly offered us, viz. to carry us to land on their backs, which was no small undertaking, as we were, especially myself, none of the lightest; however, I was the first, and believe the sailor, who was a strong man, would have carried me to land, had not both of us, in our journey thither, fallen into a large quick-sand. The sailor immediately left me (his burden) to shift for myself, whilst he did the same; but he had greatly the advantage of me, as he could swim, which I had never learned. However, I was, some how or other, buoyed up in a wonderful manner, so that I never was plunged over head; to which, [Page 175] perhaps, my great coat buttoned about me, might in some measure contribute. I well remember, that I could feel nothing under my feet but water, or soft mud that could bear up no more than water; my head being all the while above water; I knew which way we tumbled in, and being near the bank, I made some shift to scramble to it, and to climb up of myself. I then waded to the shore, being exceeding wet and dirty. We went to a poor cottage, where the accommodations were indeed very mean; but the poor people's kindness and hospitality was very noble, which we did not let pass unrewarded. We got that night to my affectionate companion's house; hav­ing travelled the before-mentioned journey with great diligence, in much love and harmony one with another, and were not quite three months out of England. The first meeting I went to after we landed, was Yeoland, as my companion belonged to it, which was a good open meeting; truth being exalted over wrong things. I went from thence to Lancaster, where I had a satisfactory meeting; the Lord's power in a good degree having dominion, to our comfort. I went from Lancaster directly to Warrington, and was at Penketh meet­ing in the forenoon, being first-day; where the Lord was pleased to favour us with a precious opportunity, truth being exalted over all, and the sincere travellers Sionward [Page 176] greatly comforted, in the sweet enjoyment of the Lord's presence, which was livingly felt amongst us. Praises to his holy name for ever! In the afternoon we had a large meeting at Warrington, where it appeared my duty to sit in silence; the want of which, properly employed, proves a great loss to our society in many places. I went next day, accompanied by my worthy friends Samuel Fothergill and William Dilworth, in order to be at Marsden-Height yearly-meeting, and to visit my kind friends there­about. I attended Marsden week-day meet­ing on fifth-day, which was satisfactory. On the first-day following, the yearly-meeting was held, to which came a large collection of friends from parts adjacent, and a pretty many people of other persua­sions. The Lord was pleased to exalt his glorious truth and the testimony thereof, in a free and open manner that day, to the comfort of many hearts. I went from thence to Todmorden, and so to Manchester, being accompanied by my affectionate friends Jonathan Raine and his wife. At Man­chester we had an open comfortable meet­ing, truth having dominion; wherein alone the upright-hearted can rejoice, with joy unspeakable and full of glory. I went to Oldham meeting on first-day; which was in a good degree open, and I hope service­able. The next day I travelled to my wor­thy friend Joshua Toft's near Leek; had [Page 177] a meeting there, in which I found it my place to sit the whole time in silence. From thence I travelled towards Birming­ham in Warwickshire, having my said friend with me. We attended both their meetings, being on first-day; they were very heavy and laborious, through the pre­valence of lukewarmness in some, and un­due liberty in others; so that I had but very little openness at either of the meet­ings, and was quite shut up in silence at one of them. The next meetings we had were at Wigansal and Atherstone; but found the life of religion very low in them. The yearly-meetings for the westerly coun­ties being to be held at Coventry, we went thither in order to attend the same, which began on first-day, the sixth of the sixth month, 1749. The meetings were held in a large town-hall; conveniency being made therein by friends for the purpose; so that one room which was called the hall, would contain by computation, not less than a thousand people; and another under the same roof, it was supposed would contain above five hundred. We had a pretty large meeting-house besides. These, I think, once or more, were all filled at one time. There was indeed a great collection of friends from many parts, and very great flockings in of others, amongst whom there was considerable openness, and their beha­viour in general was becoming. The gos­pel [Page 178] was preached with power, clearness, and good demonstration. I found myself much excused from public service, which I accounted a favour; having greatly to rejoice in the exaltation of truth's testimony through well qualified instruments, of whom there were a considerable number present, whom I greatly preferred, and was glad the public service fell chiefly upon them; for I have ever accounted it a concern of great importance, to appear by way of public testimony in those large assemblies, and have earnestly prayed they might be conducted in the best wisdom; which, doubtless, would always be the case, if the spirits of all who undertake the great and awful work of the ministry, were truly sub­jected to the alone source or fountain there­of: who is, to his humble dependant ones, wisdom and utterance. The meeting ended on third-day, to the comfort of friends, and, as far as appeared, to the general satis­faction of others; whose attention to what was delivered, and behaviour to friends in general, was to their honour, and the repu­tation of the city of Coventry. On fourth-day there was a meeting appointed at my request, in Warwick, to which I went; but when I saw the great comings in of people; many of whom by their appearance, seemed to be of the principal inhabitants; I was pretty much intimidated, and fell under discouragement for a time, know­ing [Page 179] my own great weakness. My great fear was, lest through my means, or that of some others present, truth might suffer. I cried with earnest concern to the Lord, who seeth in secret, and he was graciously pleased to hear, and to furnish with might, by his spirit in the inward man; so that the everlasting truth and its testimony, was exalted that day, and the people ap­peared to be pretty much affected there­with.

I have many times seen it very profitable to be deeply humbled, and awfully pros­trated before the almighty powerful helper of his people; that so, what we are in the ministry may be by his grace only; hav­ing observed, where the creaturely part is not wholly abased, but some sufficiency or treasure belonging thereunto is yet saved or reserved (it being very close work to be stripped of all) there hath been a mixture brought forth; a wearing the linen and woollen garment, and sowing the field with two sorts of grain; and when any by custom, their own unwatchfulness, or the neglect of others whose care should have been over them, become, as it were, esta­blished in this mixture, I think they sel­dom get out of it the right way, by the bad being removed, and the good preserved. Oh, it is a great thing to stand fully ap­proved in this solemn service! to speak as the oracles of God, and to minister of the [Page 180] ability immediately given by him. Blessed will that servant be, who when his Lord cometh, is found dividing the word aright, giving the flock and family of Christ their proper portion of meat, and that in due season.

Having a desire to take some meetings in my way into Wales, whither I intend­ed in order to visit my dear ancient mother, I took the following meetings, viz. Hen­ley, Broomsgrove, and Worcester. I had close laborious service in them, as was often my lot where I travelled. I spent about a week at my mother's, having several large tho­rough serviceable meetings amongst friends, my old neighbours, and acquaintance; their hearts being tendered, and some much affected. But, alas! things are at a low ebb with our society in those parts, and the conduct of some rather administers cause of stumbling than convincement to others. I travelled from thence to Bewdly, Stour­bridge, and Dudley; my brother Benjamin bearing me company. I had good open service at the said meetings, and went to Birmingham, where I had a hard trying meeting as before. I went from thence to Hartshill general meeting, being on a first-day. It was, through divine favour, an open good meeting. I went the third-day following back to the burial of a friend at Birmingham; and returned to the house of my kind friend John Bradford, who bore [Page 181] me company next day to Hinkley in Lei­cestershire, where we had a pretty open meeting, and went to Leicester, where the Lord was pleased to favour us with a satis­factory meeting. Next day I had a small meeting at Soilby, things being very low there. From thence to Castle-Dumington, and had two meetings, being first-day; to which many friends from Nottingham came; they were large, and I believe serviceable meetings to many. Next day I had a small poor meeting at Wimes-Wood; and went to Longclawson, where I could perceive very little of the life of religion. From thence to Oakham in Rutlandshire, and had a comfortable meeting; truth and its testi­mony had considerable dominion. From thence to Leicester quarterly-meeting; and to Kettering in Northamptonshire; where I had a good degree of openness, and truth prevailed. Then to Wellingborough, on first-day, and attended their fore and afternoon meetings; the first was a close exercising time, in a painful silence, and sorrowful sense of the indifference and in­sensibility of many; it was a large meet­ing, and to me, the much greater part ap­peared very ignorant of the importance of that worship and service they professed to meet about. In the afternoon I was favoured with wisdom and strength to discharge my mind, in a close searching testimony. The next day I had a meeting to pretty good [Page 182] satisfaction, at Rance. The day following I went to the monthly-meeting at Ramsay in Huntingdonshire, where I had good ser­vice. After which, had meetings at Ives, Godmanchester, Erith, and Hadenham; most of which were pretty open and ser­viceable, through divine help, for without the Lord's blessing on our labours, they prove altogether fruitless, the increase being from him alone. I went next to Milden­hall in Suffolk, where on a first-day I had a large meeting to good satisfaction. The next meetings were at Burry, and Haverill; the last of which, being mostly people of other societies, was open, and the testimo­nies of truth appeared to be well received. I went from thence to Saffron-Walden in Essex, and had a very painful afflicting meeting: very little to be felt of the life of religion therein. Oh! what pity it is, so many up and down, do satisfy themselves with a profession of truth; only having a name to live, when they are really dead, as to the quickenings of heavenly virtue. The next meeting I had was at Stebbing; where­in we were favoured with the opening of the living fountain in a good degree; yet there appeared to me to be some obdurate unfaithful spirits under our profession, who seemed out of reach in a sorrowful degree, and very hard to be made sensible of the weight and importance of our religious testimonies; especially in some branches [Page 183] thereof. Such cause a secret pain and an­guish, which covers the minds of poor tra­vellers in the work of the gospel, like un­to the sackcloth underneath. I seldom found room and opportunity to put it wholly off, though I was frequently favour­ed with a comfortable evidence, that the Lord was with me, graciously owning my service for him and his people. At the next meeting at Coggeshall, on first-day, I had close, searching, laborious service, and found something exceeding heavy in that meeting; yet, by divine favour, I was car­ried through to a good degree of satisfaction. Next day I had a meeting at Kelvedon, and another the day following at Witham. At both which, my labour in testimony was very close and rousing; in order, if pos­sible, to awaken and stir up lukewarm, un­faithful professors; and by the blessed effi­cacy of the word of life, the wholesome doctrine of truth was set over them, and the few upright-hearted had relief. I went from thence to Chelmsford, where I had good open service at their week-day meet­ing, and also on the first-day following: notwithstanding which, a secret pain ac­companied my mind, occasioned, in a great measure no doubt, by those unfaithful pro­fessors before hinted at, who have neither courage nor fidelity to maintain any branch of our Christian testimony, when there ap­pears any probability of outward losses, or [Page 184] suffering thereby: dealing with our princi­ple in a very lax, indifferent manner, tak­ing what they please, and sacrificing the rest to their own selfish views; such are as spots in our feasts of charity, and a mourn­ful load to the truly living in religion: but the Lord Almighty, who hears their groanings, will in his own time grant re­lief; and these shall bear their own bur­dens. I went from Chelmsford to a mar­riage at Dunmow, and from thence to Royston in Hertfordshire. Things, as to the life of religion, appeared very low there; I had nothing to minister unto them but an example of silence. Next I had a meet­ing at Baldock, which was low and rather painful. I went from thence to Hitching, and was at their first-day meetings. They were prety open and satisfactory. From thence to Ampthill, where things appeared low. Then to Hogstyend, where I had some openness and satisfaction: at Shering­ton I had a low painful meeting. The next meeting I had was at Northampton, which was a very trying time; but the Lord, by his powerful word, gave me do­minion in a good degree, over dark, liber­tine spirits: things, as to true religion, seemed almost lost there. The next meet­ing was at Bugbrook, where I had some openness, and got through my service to pretty good satisfaction. From thence to Coventry, and was at their meetings on [Page 185] first-day: in one whereof, I had close search­ing labour; I was silent in the other. The next meeting was at Edington, which was small, and things but low. I went from thence to a marriage at South-Newton. I found it my place there to sit the whole meeting in silence. The earnest expectation of people, especially on such occasions, may, and I believe often does, obstruct the cur­rent of right ministry. Silence, if duly considered, may be the best lesson of in­struction, for those whose life is too much in words or outward declarations. I have thought some amongst us are so void of a right understanding, as to apprehend a kind of necessity for something to be done by way of ministry, at marriages, and funerals especially; it being hard for them to ap­prehend, that they can be so honourably conducted without. I have therefore ob­served some, though but little concerned in the general, to maintain our testimonies by an uniform consistent deportment, appear very zealous on these occasions; taking a deal of pains, and riding many miles, and sometimes from one preacher to another, to make themselves sure of having one; and when they have been so successful as to prevail upon any to come, it would no doubt be a great disappointment, were they wholly silent. In this situation, the minister himself may, unless well-grounded, be ex­posed to temptation to gratify such. My [Page 186] principal view in this remark is, to shew how remote such are from the truth they profess, and how nearly allied to some other professors of Christianity, who make re­ligion chiefly consist in outward perform­ances; and think it not like a Christian burial, when a corpse is committed to the earth without something said over it. If that over-anxiousness in the people, above hinted, should prevail on the preachers amongst us, to answer their cravings and expectations, both in attending, and when there, in gratifying them with words, with­out a due regard to the holy weight and impressions of the word of life, as the alone moving cause to public service, they would be lost as to the living body in the so­ciety; and although such might continue in a consistent form of sound words and sound doctrine, as to the external appear­ance, yet the substance being lost, their performances would be no more than as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. Some, to our sorrow, have been observed to lose ground by such means: what can we imagine more offensive to the gracious, bountiful giver, than to prostitute such a precious divine gift, by making it subser­vient to the carnal unsanctified desires of those who are strangers to God, yet love to hear of him and his glorious acts, by the hearing of the ear? From this place I went to Hooknorton, and had a meeting; [Page 187] wherein my business was to example with silence. I then went to Sibford, where I had a meeting, and some openness; yet things were but low. From thence to Banbury, and attended their meetings on a first-day. I had open thorough service in them, and the testimony of truth was in a good degree exalted. Next day I went to South-Newton again, where I had great openness, and truth was comfortably in dominion. Much satis­faction is received by following the safe guidance and conduct thereof, whether in heights or depths, sufferings or rejoicings. I had a good meeting next day at a place I forgot the name of; and then to Adderbury, where I had a meeting; things but low. From thence to Bicester, and had a small poor meeting; there being but very few under our profession, and but little to be felt of the life of religion amongst them. My face being now turned towards the city of London, I had a small meeting at Ayles­bury, and some open service therein to my satisfaction. There are but few friends thereabout. I went to their first-day meet­ing at Jordans, which was large: my service therein, was to example the people, friends and others, with silence; which I believe was a considerable disappointment to many; bat I hope it was profitable to some. Di­vers friends from London met me there. We lodged that night at a friend's house on the way, and got to the city next day. I [Page 188] continued thereabout three weeks, visiting meetings diligently every day in the week, except the last, and one more. It was a very painful time of deep suffering in spirit, even beyond all expression. I was as a sign of silence from place to place, especially at Grace-Church-Street meeting; which, doubtless, was a great mystery to many. But it was my way to peace of mind, and I sought after contentment, though it might occasion me to be accounted a fool, by the lofty towering spirits in that city, who may justly be compared to the tall cedars of Lebanon. I left London the 19th of the 10th month, 1749, to visit the fol­lowing meetings, viz. Hertford, and St. Albans, where our friend Benjamin Kidd met me, and accompanied me to Hemp­stead, Wickham, and the quarterly-meet­ing at Oxford. The meeting there for worship was excedingly disturbed and hurt by a rude company of students, who came in like a flood, and allowed little or no stillness, till by breaking up the meeting they dispersed; by which means, we held the meeting for discipline and good order, in a quiet peaceable manner. After meet­ing I went to Witney; where next day I had a very painful exercising time, not only under a sense of undue liberties prevailing, but also of an exalted self-righteous, self-suf­ficient state; than which, none are harder to be reached unto, or made any impression [Page 189] upon: my business was to sit in silent suffer­ing with the oppressed seed. I went next to Burford, where there seemed to me very little of the life of religion. From thence I went to Cirencester, where my spirit was deeply distressed, under a painful sense of wrong things and wrong spirits. The next meeting I went to was Nailsworth, where I had close searching labour, in testimony against lukewarmness and undue liberties. From thence to the quarterly-meeting for Wiltshire; being a stranger and altogether unexpected by friends there, the close searching testimony given me to bear, es­pecially relating to the state of some active members, might be better taken, and might have more effect, than if the same had come from one better acquainted with their states. I always coveted, to be wholly unacquaint­ed with the states of meetings by outward information, in all my travels; and when, by the discourse of friends previous to my attending them, there appeared any pro­bability of their inadvertently opening in my hearing, any thing of that kind, I have generally either stopped them, or walked away out of hearing; but in general, friends who entertain us in our travels, have more prudence, and a better guard in these re­spects; as indeed all ought: for it strait­ens, and may give much uneasiness to right spirited ministers, who have a sure infal­lible guide within, and therefore have no [Page 190] need of any outward guide or information in their services. After this meeting, I visited the following meetings in that coun­ty, viz. at the house of John Fry, in Sutton. Caln, Chippenham, Melsham, Corsham, Bradford, Lavington, and Salisbury, and found things mostly low, painful, and la­borious to work through; as those under our profession appeared to me, in too gene­ral a way, satisfying themselves with the religion of their education only; without much experience in the life and virtue there­of, operating upon their hearts. Some, it is to be feared, undertaking to rule and act in the church without a proper qua­lification, and so do not therein seek the honour that cometh from God only. Here the equal balance and standard is not kept to; partiallity gets place; men and women's persons are respected, because of riches or outward substance: true judgment is per­verted; wickedness escapes censure, to the affecting the whole community, as in the case of Achan. Such things provoke the Lord, (who is the only strength and defence of his people) to withdraw. They then be­come languid; their hearts become water, and the inhabitants of the land prevail against them, till they are in the end made desolate. The next meetings I had were Andover, Whitchurch, Basingstoke, and Alton; having, through divine help, had some profitable service, tending to warn [Page 191] and excite friends to a more diligent and careful discharge of the several duties their stations required: but I could not help viewing, with some painful reflections, a lukewarmness and declension which sor­rowfully prevails in many places. At Alton, which is a large meeting, I found some solid weighty friends, to whom my spirit was nearly united; having, in the main, good satisfaction and openness amongst them; with searching close service to the unfaithful; in which I was favoured with the comfortable help of upright spirits, whose sincere travel is maintained for an in­crease of faithful labourers in the Lord's vineyard and the restoring of ancient beauty.

Now did my deep and painful labours in this visit begin to wear off, and to draw towards a period, as far as related to my travels at this time, in Great-Britain and Ireland. I therefore soon expected a full discharge, as I then saw little before me, save the city of London. I had meetings at Godalming, Guilford, and Esher, in my way thither; in which I had some service to my own satisfaction, and I hope to the help of friends.

I continued in the city some time, visit­ing meetings with diligence. My mind being deeply exercised as usual in a painful travel, with and for the suffering seed of God in the hearts of professors, who to [Page 192] me appeared, in too general a way, living, moving, acting and breathing, in an airy exalted region above it. I have often been ready to say, By whom shall Jacob, the true seed, arise? for he is very small in the esteem and regard of professors of most ranks. Yet I could see an afflicted suffering remnant, lie very low, as under the ruins, panting, and, as it were, struggling for life. And although we could see, and knew one another, and travelled together under a de­gree of the same painful feeling sense of things; yet, not having it in our power to relieve one another, our proper business was to travel under our respective burden, un­til the Almighty Deliverer was pleased to appear, calling his suffering ones to domi­nion and rule with him, who is Lord of Lords and King of Kings: for the Lamb and his followers shall have the victory; though they are permitted sometimes to suf­fer long. I had then, at times, faith to believe he would raise the dry bones, and they should stand upon their feet; an army to fight the Lord's battles; to bring the mighty from their seats, and to take the crowns of some who seemed to reign as kings, from them; making their nakedness appear. Surely the complaints of the Lord, by the mouth of his prophet concerning Israel, was mournfully verified in the city of London, respecting a great part of the society, viz. ‘My people have committed [Page 193] two great evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewn them out cisterns, broken cisterns that can hold no water.’ Such is a profession, though of the truth itself, without the real possession. Such is truth in notion, specu­lation, and imitation only. The same may be said of whatever is done in religion, without the immediate influence, direction, and leadings of the holy author's spirit and power. Sound doctrine may be preached, as to words and the main scope thereof, and true principles imbibed from education, tuition, or other outward means; yet the man's part being alive, active, and always ready; the child's and fool's state, that knows its sufficiency for every good word and work to be immediately received from God alone, is neither experienced nor abode in. ‘For it is not you that speak, but the spirit of your Father that speaketh in you, or by you.’ I say, without this living sense of things, all is but a broken cistern; it will hold none of the water of life; which is the real cause, that the endeavours and seeming zeal of some for the promotion of religion, are so dry, insipid, and inefficacious. Truth will carry its own evidence. The spring of action being the holy spirit of Christ, it will gain the assent of all his children, and answer his pure witness in the hearts of the rebellious, far beyond what many con­ceive or imagine. Upon which I would [Page 194] just observe, that the only way to preserve the strength, glory, and dignity of a reli­gious society, is for all who undertake to be active in it, certainly to feel the Lord lead­ing and directing them in all their ser­vices; and, on the other hand, the sure way to desolation is, when the active mem­bers in religious things move therein by the strength of human abilities only. A great deal depends hereon, more than some are aware of; it is observable, that the pre­servation of the Jewish church in purity, much depended upon the governors and rulers thereof; and so does, and will, the prosperity and purity of the Christian church.

I had very little openness in respect to ministry, but was silent as usual, from meeting to meeting. Indeed, my suffer­ings in spirit were exceeding great and deep, day and night, in that city, so that I was weary of this life, and, as it were, sought for death; being at times ready to say, it is better for me to die than to live. I much wondered why it should be so; but have since seen, it was in order for the fil­ling up that measure of the sufferings of Christ allotted to me, which I have seen the great advantage of, with respect to giving dominion over those things and spirits, that were the cause of those great sufferings, which could not be stood against, nor overcome any other way. For, as saith [Page 195] the apostle, ‘If so be we suffer with Christ, we shall also reign with him.’ And our Lord also said, ‘Verily I say unto you, that ye which have followed me in the re­generation; when the Son of Man shall sit in the throne of his glory, ye also shall sit upon twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel.’ I have sometimes thought, as I believe it may, by the fore­going account, appear to others, that I was led in a manner somewhat uncommon, to see and feel the sorrowful declension of our society, in my travels through these na­tions; though I am very sensible, divers faithful brethren have shared in the like painful travail; which, in some degree, may be compared with that of Nehemiah; who, under great anxiety and distress of mind, entered upon a long and hazardous journey, and went in the night, to view the breaches and desolations made in the city of the great king, before he and the people arose in the name of the Lord, to build the walls of that city and to set up the gates thereof. For he found the hand of the Lord upon him, moving and strengthening him to seek the good and prosperity of his own people. These things are written for encouragement and instruction to the painful labourers in the Lord's work; that they faint not under the weight and exercise thereof; nor think strange concerning such fiery baptisms and trials as they may meet with in the [Page 196] course of their travels. They may be well assured, that such things are all directed in wisdom; which, in the Lord's time, will appear to their full satisfaction and comfort. For it is far from the fountain of infinite kindness, to permit such heavy affliction to fall upon his servants un­necessarily.

I went from London into Essex, in order to visit some meetings in that county, which I had not been at before, and was at Chelmsford week-day meeting on fifth-day, where I had good satisfaction. The virtue of truth being shed abroad, to the joy and comfort of the living. On the first-day following I was at Colchester meetings. My mind was painfully depressed, under a sense that truth suffered much in that place by wrong things: where evil is wink­ed at, and undue liberties in a religious society, are suffered to escape judgment or censure; weakness, and, as it were a cloud of darkness, comes over meetings as well as individuals. The Lord was graciously pleased for his blessed name's sake, to arise, and in some good degree, to dispel the darkness; whereby truth and the testi­mony thereof, was exalted over all corrupt unsanctified spirits; and the few upright-hearted were sweetly comforted; it being a time of relief to their spirits, in a good degree. I went from thence to the follow­ing meetings, viz. Copford, Coln, Hal­stead, [Page 197] and Braintree, wherein I had tho­rough service, in plain dealing and close labour with the unfaithful, of which num­ber there seemed to be many; and but few who had really bought the blessed truth. It is such only, who know how precious and valuable it is, and who cannot easily be prevailed upon to sell it for a thing of nought, nor even for any consideration whatever. But it is not so with those who have their religion, if it may be so called, by education only, or derived as it were, by way of inheritance like their out­ward possessions, from their ancestors. The principles of religion only thus received and held, are often subjected to temporal conveniency and worldly interest. Where the world and true religion stand in com­petition with each other, such professors will soon give place to the world; wherein they do really deny Christ before men, and will as certainly, unless they repent, be denied by him before the Father and his holy angels. I returned out of Essex to London; for though I had had but little openness as to ministry there, yet I found my mind engaged to attend their meet­ings, as I apprehended, in order to suffer and travail with the true seed, for its enlarge­ment, as well as to be a sign and example of the important duty of silence, to the pro­fessors of truth. They had been long and greatly favoured with living testimonies, [Page 198] even line upon line, and precept upon pre­cept; under all which, for want of a pro­per application and improvement thereby, the society declined, and the ancient beauty thereof greatly faded away; I mean, in what relates to the life and spirit of reli­gion in the practical part thereof; for the body of the society every where, as far as ever appeared to me, are remarkably one in faith and profession, the same which hath been held and professed by us as a people, from the beginning. This won­derful oneness and agreement amongst us every where, (which I have not observed, neither do I believe it is to be found amongst any other set of Christians, to that degree,) is to me a clear evidence, that the original foundation thereof, was the one infallible spirit of Jesus Christ our Lord, who prayed the father, that his followers might be one, as the Father and the Son are one. And notwithstanding great numbers in our so­ciety are resting satisfied with an empty profession, and by their unfaithfulness, fall greatly short of the dignity our worthy pre­decessors attained unto; which, considering the abundant favours bestowed from time to time, for the help and preservation of the society, is cause of deep mourning and sore lamentation; yet, there has been, through the kind providence of God, from the beginning down to this time, a living body, preserved the same in faith and prac­tice [Page 199] with our ancients. These are scatter­ed and interspersed throughout the whole society like the salt thereof, in order, if possible, that all may be seasoned. I think there are very few if any meetings, wholly destitute of some of that sort; so that I would not have it understood, by the fore­going mournful complaints, (although there may be just cause for them) that I think the society is become desolate, or that the glory is departed therefrom: far be that from me; I am fully convinced to the con­trary, and at times have faith to believe, the glory will never wholly depart, nor shall we cease to be a living people: yet I believe, numbers under our profession, for their great unfaithfulness and unfruitful­ness, will be blowed upon by the Lord, and rejected, and others called into the vine­yard, who will be more diligent and faithful.

After I had continued some time in the city, apprehending myself nearly clear of further service at this time in these na­tions, and that I might with safety look out for an opportunity of returning to my outward habitation in America; I therefore applied to the brethren here, for a certifi­cate of my travels, &c. which they readily granted; setting forth their unity with my services and demeanor under this weighty engagement. But as no suitable opportu­nity appeared likely to present for some [Page 200] time, I had leisure to look into, and care­fully to weigh an affair of great importance, which had by this time so far prevailed on my attention, that I was afraid wholly to reject it, as I had a considerable time done on its first darting into my thoughts; looking upon it almost impracticable to be brought about: which was, entering into a married state with my endeared friend Frances Wyatt, before mentioned. Al­though I never had any other objection to it, than our both being, as far as appeared then to me, settled in our places; from which I thought it would be very unsafe, without the best counsel, to remove. But that objection was wholly removed, by my way opening (as I thought) with great clear­ness, to settle in England on account of my future service. I was deeply concerned in my mind to be rightly guided herein; which was answered so indisputably clear to my understanding, that I could no longer hesitate about it. The next thing was, settling matters relative thereunto with my said friend; that so, if she found no objec­tion, our marriage might be accomplished, if providence permitted, after my returning home, settling my affairs there, and remove­ing in order to settle in this nation. I therefore laid the whole before her, as things relating thereunto had appeared to me, desiring her solid consideration thereof, and answer, when she was prepared to re­turn [Page 201] me one. I found the same powerful hand which had removed my objections, was at work in her mind to remove hers also; so that she could not be easy to put a negative upon the proposal, as believing the thing was right, which was still con­firming to me, We therefore in the fear, and, as we had cause to believe, in the coun­sel of God, engaged with each other, in the relation we then stood, and to accomplish our marriage, when way should be made by divine providence for the same. We had no views on either side for worldly advancement: an anxiousness after which appeared to me immaterial, as I was fully persuaded we were directed in our said engagement, by the wisdom and counsel of him, who can give or take away outward blessings at his pleasure. I therefore had not freedom, pre­vious to my engaging with her therein, to make any inquiry into her circumstances in the world. All which, however, with the superior blessing of an affectionate wife and true help-mate, I afterwards found agreeable and comfortable. Having, as above, paved the way to remove and settle in England, and a good opportunity pre­senting of a ship, in which several valuable friends intended to embark; I went on board the Speedwell, John Stevenson master, at Gravesend, the 8th of the 3d month, 1750, in company with our friends Jonah Thompson and Mary Weston, who were [Page 202] going on a religious visit to the churches in America. We had several friends on board, and many other passengers, being fourteen or fifteen of us belonging to the cabin and state rooms. Some of them were bad peo­ple, whose conversation proved very disa­greeable to us; so that we spent much of our time on the deck, night and day, except when we took our rest in sleep. Our de­parture was from the Start Point, the 11th in the evening, being the last land seen by us until we discovered America. We had a fine gale of wind down the English chan­nel, and a good set off to sea by the same; but we often had scant, and sometimes con­trary winds afterwards, which made it ra­ther a slow passage, though much quicker than some have gone. The seventeenth of the 4th month, we found ourselves on the banks of Newfoundland, and in the midst of near twenty sail of French ships who were fishing there for cod. We spoke with one of them, who told us we had about twenty-five fathom water; whereupon the captain ordered the ship to be brought to, that we might take some fresh cod. This was very agreeable to us all; they succeeded so well, that in about two hours, there lay upon the deck twenty-four of the finest cod fish I ever saw. This proved an agreeable feast to us for about one week; and altho' through mercy, we had very great plenty of provisions; yet this was an ac­ceptable [Page 203] change. It was the 5th of the 5th month, about three o'clock in the after­noon, when to our great joy we saw the land of America; and by sounding, found ourselves in about twenty-five fathom water, and entered the Capes of Delaware that night. We had a prosperous gale up the bay and river, so that I landed at Chester in Pennsylvania, about eight miles from my own house, on the 7th of the 5th month about three o'clock in the afternoon, and got home that night; having been on board two months lacking one day, and from home in the whole journey, two years, seven months, and eight days; having tra­velled in that time by sea and land, I think on a moderate calculation, 11875 miles, and was at about 560 meetings. I had be­fore concluded, with divine permission, to return in the same ship, and left a large chest of stores on board. When discharged of her loading, she was to sail for Mary­land, there to take in a cargo of tobacco, where I intended meeting her; it being about seventy miles from my house. In a day or two after my arrival I went to Phi­ladelphia, where I found my friends gene­rally much alarmed, with news brought by letters in the ship I came over in (for they had not heard it before) of my intention to return, to marry and settle in England. Many, I believe, being ignorant of the grounds and motives upon which I acted [Page 204] therein, judged concerning the same from the outward appearance only; supposing that having found one I liked, I had let my mind out towards marrying, and made that the principal inducement of my removing. Had this been the case, I freely acknowledge that I should have deserved blame; as acting upon a very dangerous bottom to myself, and setting an unsafe example for others to follow; believing some have sustained great loss, by inadvertent steps of this kind, in their travels on truth's account. This was what I greatly feared in relation to my­self, and therefore (as before hinted) durst not give way to the thoughts of entangling myself therein, until I had repeatedly (as I thought at least) received clear evidence in my mind, of its being my duty to re­move into this nation for future service. I do therefore earnestly caution all, to be aware of taking any encouragement from my example herein, unless they have the same evidence, and act upon the same bot­tom as I did agreeable to what is above-mentioned, and are well assured of divine direction, as I was. That I was rightly guided in my removal, has not only been fully confirmed to myself since, but, I am persuaded also, to many others: and even at that time, those who were free enough to confer with me thereon, appeared to be well satisfied, whom for their freedom and openness to me on that account, I looked [Page 205] upon to be some of my best friends; and as to others, I thought it my duty to bear with patience and meekness all they were pleased to say and conjecture, until time made manifest who were in the right.

I attended the yearly-meeting held at Burlington, for Pennsylvania and the Jer­seys, in the seventh month, wherein the Lord was graciously pleased to overshadow our large assemblies with his heavenly power and presence, to our great comfort and edification; having with joy to draw water out of the wells of salvation, and to offer the praise and humble thanksgiving to the alone fountain thereof, who is for ever worthy.

Having settled my affairs, and obtained a certificate of removal from the monthly meeting of Darby, in Chester county, in Pennsylvania, to which I belonged, directed to the monthly-meeting of Witham in Essex, Old England; myself and daughter set out from my own house in Darby afore­said, accompanied by my sister Mary (who since my wife's decease, had been my good careful house-keeper) together with several friends, the 12th of the 8th month, 1750. We travelled to East Nottingham, being about sixteen miles from the place where the ship lay in which I intended to em­bark. My sister and one of the friends staid with us about a week, and then took their solemn leave. My daughter and I [Page 206] staid thereabout until the 2d of the 9th month. I visited some meetings in the neighbourhood to good satisfaction, and was at many in East Nottingham, it being a very large meeting, and a zealous body of friends then belonged thereto; amongst whom I had good service and great open­ness; the precious unity of the one spirit being livingly enjoyed, in which we took a solemn farewel of one another. The 2d of the 9th month aforesaid we set out, ac­companied by divers of our worthy friends, and crossed the great river Susquehannah, taking our quarters at Jacob Giles's house within sight of the ship; but were not or­dered on board until the 8th. We did not sail until the 11th at noon. The unskilful pilot ran us a-ground twice that afternoon, and caused the poor sailors hard labour and much fatigue, which I was sorry for. It was the 18th about two o'clock in the afternoon, before we got clear of Chesapeak bay; having then a fine wind, we soon lost sight of land.

We had been at sea but about four days, when he espied a sail or two, who, by their motions, appeared very desirous to speak with us, which, at length, one of them belonging to Rhode-Island effected, inform­ing us, they were reduced to a very small quantity of provisions, and earnestly intreat­ing the master to afford them some assist­ance. He, to my grief and surprise, gave [Page 207] them a very short denial; allegeing we were but newly come out to sea, and did not yet know what we might want our­selves. I was very much troubled in my mind at the hardness of his heart, and im­mediately stepped up to him, and in as moving language as I was capable of, in­terceded for the poor sufferers. The first mate being a man of a good disposition, joined with me herein. We at length so prevailed on the master, that he gave them liberty to hoist out their boat, and come on board us; telling them he would see what could be done for them; which, poor creatures, they gladly complied with; the master of the ship and four of his sailors, being quickly on board of us. It was very affecting, to behold want so conspicuous in their faces, and to see how greatly they re­joiced, with thankfulness, that kind pro­vidence had, in mercy, cast us in their way, for their relief; in which I could heartily join with them; much rejoicing we had not inhumanly turned them off without help. The master, (to give him his due,) did at last hand to them pretty liberally; for which he charged what he thought pro­per, and took that master's draught for the money, on his owner in London. I spared them some out of my private store, for which I wanted no other pay, than the satisfaction of relieving their great wants; [Page 208] being very glad I had been instrumental thereunto.

The next day we had a great storm, and an exceeding high sea, so that we could carry no sail, but fastened the helm and let the ship drive withersoever the wind and waves would carry her: we were in­deed mightily tossed; but through divine favour, my mind was sweetly calm and comfortable, feeling his living presence who is God of the seas and the dry land, to be near. My heart was filled with the joy of his salvation, so that I could sing and make melody therein to him; in which I had confirming evidence, as I many times had under the same precious enjoyment, both by sea and land after I left England, that my way and undertaking was approved of the Lord, and would be blessed and prospered by him; which yielded more com­fort to my mind, than any thing in this world could do. The severest part of the storm lasted but about twelve hours; and altho' we had two considerable storms after­wards, yet for the most part, it was a ready good passage. On the 17th of the 10th month in the morning, we sounded, and in sixty-nine fathom water we found ground. The same morning about ten o'clock, we had the very agreeable sight of England. Next day, the wind being against us, we made but lit­tle advantage of sailing. The nineteenth about eight o'clock at night, we came to [Page 209] an anchor in Falmouth harbour. Going on shore next day, we went to an inn in the town. Our kind hospitable friend Joseph Tregellis, came and invited us to his house, where we had generous entertainment whilst we were at that place. I was seve­ral times at their meetings, both at Fal­mouth and Penryn, and had openness and good satisfaction. My worthy friends of that town, Andrew Hingeston and his wife, and daughter, were affectionately kind to me, which I cannot well avoid mentioning, out of a grateful sense I retain thereof, as we were entire strangers; for I had not been that way when in England before.

Having been detained there about a week, we put out to sea again, in order to proceed to London, whither we were bound. The second-day of our being out, towards even­ing, as we were sailing within about a league and half of Dover, a boat from thence came on board for letters. The wind then not being fair to go up the River Thames, we went with them to Dover, and next day to Gravesend, where crossing the water at Grays in Essex, I proceeded from thence to Chelmsford.

My dear friend Frances Wyatt and I, after proceeding according to the good order of friends, accomplished our mar­riage with each other, at a large meeting of friends and others in Chelmsford meet­ing-house, the 14th day of the then 1st [Page 210] month, 1750-1, in the sweet and sensible en­joyment of his presence, who saw in the be­ginning, it was not good for man to be alone; and therefore he did, in great kind­ness, provide an help-mate to be with him, who was bone of his bone, and flesh of his flesh. It is therefore said, they shall be no more twain, but one flesh. The Lord then joined the man and his wife together. Happy would it have been for mankind, had they never sought, nor found out any other way of joining in that relation since. But as the sons (or worshippers) of the true God, formerly looked upon the daughters of men, with an eye that tendeth to prevert this ordinance, making it only answer the base ends of carnal desire; following the dictates of their own evil heart, instead of the counsel of God, in this great undertak­ing; so it is evidently the case at this day with too many. It is also often not so much what the woman or man is, as what worldly substance they have. Where there is plenty of that, many real defects, with respect to those qualifications and en­dowments essential to real happiness in a married state, are over-looked. Thus, by man's ignorantly and presumptuously taking upon him the guidance and government of himself, instigated thereunto by the subtilty of Satan; those outward accomodations, which were by divine providence intended as blessings, become quite the reverse. To [Page 211] prevent such unhappy consequences to young people and others, I know of no advice bet­ter adapted for their safety and preservation, than that of our Lord's, viz. ‘Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteous­ness, and all these things shall be added unto you.’ Those who have happily, by seeking, found this kingdom, and live therein, which consisteth in righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Ghost, have great advantage, even in outward things, above all others; as the blessing of God, which maketh truly rich, attends all their worldly affairs. They enjoy what appertains to this life with a proper relish. ‘Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth,’ Mat. v. 5. As it is man's duty and safety to seek the Lord's counsel and blessing; so it is truly honourable amongst men: for this, Jabez was said to be more honourable than his brethren; for he called on the God of Israel, saying, ‘Oh, that thou wouldest bless me indeed, and enlarge my coast, and that thine hand might be with me, and that thou wouldest keep me from evil, that it may not grieve me!’ And God granted him that which he requested. Let me conclude this observation with ten­der advice and caution to all whom it may concern, into whose hands this may come, to be aware they do not fall into that dan­gerous snare of supposing, as marriage is an outward affair, they need consult nothing [Page 212] further therein than their own inclination, and their own reason; it is said, ‘Woe to the rebellious children, that ask counsel, but not of me, saith the Lord.’ And Christ is called, Wonderful, Counsellor, as well as a mighty God. Now as marriage is allowed to be the most important affair in this life, and may tend greatly either to promote our happiness or misery in the next; if we have no occasion to seek the Lord's counsel herein, in what are we to expect or desire it? Abraham's servant, when he was only engaged about procure­ing a wife for his younger master Isaac, with great earnestness sought the Lord's guidance and blessing therein, and obtained it in a remarkable manner. What (say some) are we to look for, or to expect a revelation in such cases? We must desire the Lord to guide and direct our steps in this, and all other affairs of consequence in relation to this life, or we shall certainly miss our way. But this we cannot clearly understand, un­til the man's part is reduced in us, and we see what we are without God, that we may find occasion to pray without ceasing, and in every thing to give thanks. Then the constant cry will be, Guide me with thy counsel. When this is, with great sincerity, the state of the mind, we cannot miss our way; because divine protection is ever present, although we do not always see it, no more than the prophet's servant [Page 213] did, until his eyes were opened ^*. The great thing is, to have a single eye, that whatever we do, may be done to the glory of God. When this is the case, we say, if this or that be not agreeable to thy will, O God, thou hast all power in thine hand; do thou, by thy over-ruling providence, direct me according to thy blessed will. The Lord will keep such in all their ways, and be their sure defence.

We settled together after marriage, at Chelmsford in the county of Essex, where I enjoyed great satisfaction and comfort in an affectionate wife. Yet such I found the low and almost desolate situacion of our society in the said county; especially in relation to good order and that discipline established amongst us, by the power, and in the wisdom of truth, as a hedge to de­fend and preserve from hurtful things, that it gave me much painful concern of mind. The difference appearing so very great, as I had before resided where discipline in the general was well maintained. I could not discover, either by their books or inquiry, that the unfaithful or disorderly walkers had (a few instances excepted) been for many years regularly dealt with, and their misconduct censured, either by monthly or quarterly meetings. I diligently attended those meetings, but my spirit was greatly distressed therein, as the members seemed to move and act in another element (as I [Page 214] may say) than that I had been accustomed to, in managing the weighty affairs of the church. The first thing of importance that laid hold of my mind, as wanting to be reformed, was relating to women's meet­ings▪ there being no such held quarterly, nor at but few of the monthly meetings; and where there was any thing of that nature it was of little or no service, in the manner then held. Having therefore the advices and directions of the yearly-meeting, rela­ting to women's meetings, I requested li­berty of the quarterly-meeting to read the same therein, which I did, making such remarks thereon, as appeared to me then necessary. At the same time I proposed, that the meeting should take that weighty affair, of establishing women's quarterly and monthly meetings, agreeable to the repeat­ed pressing advices of the yearly-meeting, into solid consideration; and if it was thought proper, that a few friends might be appointed to form some general direc­tions for the assistance of our women friends, pointing out to them (as for want of oppor­tunity, they were pretty much strangers thereunto) how such meetings are to be conducted, and the part of church disci­pline that properly comes under their no­tice, and requires the management of the women. All which was agreed to, and minuted. The proposed directions were pre­pared by the friends appointed, brought to [Page 215] the next quarterly-meeting, and there agreed to. The women having previous notice, withdrew at the close of the meeting of worship, into an apartment, to receive what we had to lay before them, and una­nimously agreed thereunto. A quarterly meeting of women friends being then esta­blished, pressing advice was sent by minute, to monthly meetings, that they should en­courage and establish women's meetings amongst them also, which was complied with. And although our women friends, for want of being brought up by their an­cestors in the management of the disci­pline, might be rather unexperienced at first, yet I am well assured, this step tended much to enlarge our meetings, and to make them more lively; opening the way of sin­cere travellers to a fuller enjoyment of spiritual good, wherein alone is our ability for every good word and work. Some few, from a right sense of the importance of the work, joined me in an earnest labour for a general reformation, and as we felt the weight of things upon our minds, we gave up to visit monthly-meetings, to help the weak, and to move forward the wheels of discipline, which, especially at the first, moved very heavily; for although we had many in the county under our profession, yet few of them had their hands clean e­nough to handle the affairs of the church; many being, as it were, crippled with un­faithfulness, [Page 216] especially in their mean and cowardly compliance with the anti-chris­tian demand of tythes, and things of that nature, which of itself unfits for service amongst us; for I never saw much, if any, true living zeal for the cause of God, in those who have fallen into this defection. Oh! the darkaess and cause of stumbling it has occasioned in this poor county, and in other places where it hath prevailed. We found ourselves concerned, repeatedly to visit such in their families, labouring in Christian love, to bring them into a sense of the inconsistency of their conduct with their profession therein; which labour, though prevalent with some, hath been no otherwise successful in general, than the discharge of that duty, which one mem­ber of a religious community owes to ano­ther; and by bringing the judgment of truth in some degree over them, they be­came more distinguished from the faithful. We had great peace in this labour, though hard and unpleasant, as we found them dark and difficult to be reached unto, a few excepted. However, these endeavours great­ly tended to exalt truth's testimony, for which our worthy predecessors deeply suf­fered. In process of time, through the blessed assistance of our holy head, en­gaging a small remnant to labour in the monthly and quarterly-meetings for a re­formation, good order hath been much pro­moted, [Page 217] and our Christian discipline, in its several branches, has been in a good degree put in practice; and some came to under­stand, it is necessary to receive wisdom and strength from God, for the maintaining that work. So that although things, in that respect, through the unsoundness and lukewarmness of many professors, are now low, yet the Lord continues to be gracious, in affording us the blessed assistance of his holy spirit, both in our meetings for divine worship, and those for discipline; whereby some are enabled in meekness to labour for the maintaining his cause, notwithstanding the discouragement they meet with, not only from a view of the languid state of the so­ciety in general, but also from the brittle jealous spirits of some. Having laboured in our own county, according to ability received of God (for without his divine assist­ance, I have, by long experience, known I could do nothing) I attended the yearly-meetings in London as they fell in course, therein to join with the sincere travellers for Sion's prosperity, in the important care of truth's affairs throughout the world. This weighty engagement coming more upon some of us than heretofore, as many of the [...]ers and faithful labourers were re­moved to their rest. Our valuable friends John Churchman and William Brown from Pennsylvania, were at several of the first yearly-meetings after my settling in this [Page 218] nation. They laboured in these nations, in the service of truth, near four years, having left affectionate wives and children for truths sake. Such noble disinterested endeavours, without any view towards tem­poral interest, is a very great mystery to the worldly wise. The above named friends were great and good instruments in the Lord's hand, not only at the yearly-meet­ings, but also in their travels up and down, for the promotion of discipline and good order in the churches; though not without considerable opposition from some, who, under pretence of acting for the good of the society, were in reality advocates for undue liberty. Notwithstanding some such difficulties, the Lord hath greatly strength­ened the hands of his pained ones for Sion's welfare, and blessed his work to the pro­moting of good order, as the likeliest means of reviving ancient beauty and comeliness; there having been great stirrings, and much labour of late years, to bring the several members of the society into the holy order of the gospel. May the Lord yet continue the blessing of wisdom and strength, that the work may be carried on, to the praise of his worthy name and the preservation of his people, is the earnest prayer of my soul!

I set out the 16th of the 6th month, 1751, intending to take some meetings in my way to the circular yearly-meeting for [Page 219] the western counties, to be held at Brooms­grove in Worcestershire, and from thence to visit the meetings of friends in Wales. I first went to the burial of a friend at Steb­bing, and proceeded through Walden, Cam­bridge, and Huntington, to Wellingbo­rough in Northamptonshire; and attended both their meetings on a first-day; having close earnest labour, in a sense of great dullness, and much insensibility prevailing on many professors. My spirit was greatly burdened therewith; but the Lord was pleased to arise, and dispel the darkness in a good degree, giving me thorough service, especially in the afternoon; I hope not easily to be forgot. I went away greatly relieved, and had a meeting at Coventry, which was heavy and laborious, though I was, through divine favour, enabled to wade through to mine own ease, in a good degree. I had a good open meeting that evening at Nun-Eaton; there being but one family of friends in the town, but a large number of others were at the meeting; divers of whom seemed pretty much affected with the testi­mony of truth. I had a close exercising meeting the next day at Atherstone, where things were very low, yet truth arose and opened doctrine for their help. I had a meeting that evening at Polesworth, which was open and comfortable. From thence I went to Woolverhampton, where I had a small meeting, things being very low. [Page 220] After which I went to Colebrook Dale, where I had a meeting, and close thorough service, tending to stir up friends to dili­gence, as well as to encourage the upright-hearted. I went from thence to Shrews­bury: the number of professors there was very small, and the life of religion very much depressed, not only by the lukewarm­ness of some, but also by a blasting, windy, lifeless ministry, which they had long sat under; doubtless, to the great uneasiness of the few sensible amongst them. I had a painful sense of the great hurt thereof in that meeting, being concerned to sit the whole meeting through in silence, I be­lieve, as an example to friends, and rebuke to that forward unsanctified spirit: the same soon after was made manifest to both friends and others, to be very corrupt, and was deservedly testified against by the monthly-meeting. I have divers times, in my travels, perceived great hurt to the pro­sperity of truth, by such unsanctified pre­tenders to a divine commission, intruding themselves into the ministry; but always have apprehended them a bad sort of people to deal with by advice and caution, as they are commonly very positive and self-willed; being seldom, in this declined state of the church, without a party, who had rather have almost any kind of ministry than silence; which makes it much more difficult for those who have a right sense of their [Page 221] spirits, to bring the judgment of truth over such; as those above-mentioned are apt to screen them, and cover their heads, unless they manifest themselves, which hath in the end frequently happened, by their being guilty of some immoral conduct. I went af­ter meeting to visit two friends, who had been imprisoned there a considerable time for refusing to pay tythes. As soon as I had entered the place of their confinement, I sensibly felt the Son of peace was there. My mind being brought into great nearness, unity, and Christian sympathy with them in their suffering state, which they appear­ed to bear with chearfulness, and true re­signation to the divine will. The sense of the great importance of that testimony they were concerned to maintain, by suffering for it, and what our worthy predecessors went through, in nasty stinking prisons and dungeons, where many of them ended their days in support thereof, who may be very justly numbered amongst the faithful mar­tyrs of Jesus Christ, overcame my mind with tenderness to that degree, that I could not presently discourse with them about their sufferings. We had a blessed oppor­tunity together, and took our leave of each other, in the sweet enjoyment of the pure love of God. Oh, how much more joyous and refreshing it is to visit such faithful sufferers, than to visit carnal professors of the same truth, who violate that precious [Page 222] testimony, by voluntary putting into the priests mouths, lest they should prepare war against them, making religion bow down to their supposed temporal interest, thereby not only declaring themselves mere pretenders thereunto, but also increasing the sufferings of those under the same profession who dare not temporize! I returned from thence to Colebrook Dale, where I had a hard trying meeting held in silence; and went to Birmingham, where I had divers times been before, and generally had painful la­borious meetings; but now it pleased divine goodness to favour with openness and good authority, to declare the truth largely; I believe to the stirring up of the careless, at least to a present sense of their duties; as well as to the comfort and edification of the honest-hearted, to my own peace and great relief. From this place I went to Brooms­grove, in order to attend the yearly-meet­ing before-mentioned, which began on first-day, the 1st of the 7th month, being held in a barn, fitted up by friends for that pur­pose: it ended the third-day following; many ministring friends attended it, some of whom were largely opened by the power and wisdom of truth, to publish the gos­pel tidings with clearness and good demon­stration. The people, though numerous, being generally very still and attentive, appeared to receive the testimony of truth with pleasure, and things were in the main [Page 223] well conducted. Here my friend John Bradford joined me as a companion. We had a large meeting at Worcester on fourth-day, in which truth had comfortable domi­nion, especially near the conclusion, to the great satisfaction and joy of many hearts. Blessed be the Lord our God, for his con­tinued favours to his people! On the fifth-day we had a small poor meeting at Broom­yard in Herefordshire; things being very low in that place, as to truth and friends. On sixth-day we had a meeting at Leomin­ster; the fore part was very cloudy and painful, yet by the gracious springing up of light and life, I got through my service therein to good satisfaction. The next day, being the seventh of the week, I went to my dear mother's in Radnorshire. On first-day, the neighbours being apprized of my being come, flocked to the Pales meet­ing in abundance. The Lord was pleased to favour me with a large open time, to declare his everlasting truth amongst them, with which they appeared to be much af­fected. I had such another opportunity with friends and many others, at Talcoyd, near my mother's house. They seemed greatly affected with the virtue of truth; but I doubt they stumble at the cross. On second-day we had a meeting at a place cal­led the Coom, about six miles from my mother's, pretty open and comfortable. On fourth-day, the 11th, I took leave of my [Page 224] worthy affectionate mother, relations and friends thereabout, having my brother Ben­jamin for our guide over the bleak moun­tains into Cardiganshire. The wind blew hard and it rained, but through mercy we received very little harm thereby. Next day we had a small poor meeting at one Evans's; religion being at a very low ebb in that place; my chief business, as far as I could see, was to detect a vile impostor, who had, by a feigned and hypocritical shew, got the advantage of the weakness and credulity of friends there. I never had seen him before, that I know of, but my spirit was exceedingly burdened with his deceitful groanings and feigned agitation in the meeting, and was then satisfied his spirit was very foul and corrupt, as it was like a nuisance to me all the time. I warn­ed friends to be aware of him; and to keep him at a distance; but they seemed willing to hope that there was some good in him, as he appeared so much concerned in meet­ings, &c. so I saw whereabout they who pleaded thus were themselves, as they seemed taken with, and rather to approve of what was so very offensive and even odious to me in that meeting, viz. his pretended exercise therein. But if people will lay hold suddenly on such, they must partake with them in their sins; for this man discovered himself to be very bad, by being guilty of gross wickedness. I think [Page 225] the meeting was held in silence. After which, we went to a place called Penbank in Carmarthenshire, where a meeting was held next day to pretty good satisfaction, being favoured with matter and utterance for their help; though things appeared low; the same day in the evening I had a very poor afflicting meeting at Penplace; great slackness and weakness appeared in the few professors there. We were quite silent as to public ministry. We went from thence to Carmarthen, and attended their meet­ings on a first-day; had good open service therein, especially in the afternoon, many of the neighbours coming in: the testimony of truth went forth freely and largely a­mongst them, with which they appeared to be much reached and affected; and might, I hope, tend to remove a prejudice they had imbibed, from the misconduct of one or more, of high pretentions lately in that place, but then removed. We had a meet­ing on second-day in the evening, at Laugh­arn, where very few, if any, properly of our society, resided; many of the neigh­bours came in; we had a good opportunity amongst them, in the free extendings of gospel love; the doctrine whereof seemed to have a considerable reach upon them. On third-day we had a meeting amongst a few professors at James-town; it being their harvest time, they seemed more concerned about their corn than religion; several rush­ing [Page 226] out, in a disorderly manner, to take care of that, as there was some appearance of rain. It was with much difficulty we procured a guide to Haverfordwest. At length we prevailed on a young woman, who seemed to have the most lively sense of religion of any amongst them. Having a large ferry to cross over Milford Haven, by such difficulties we were so hindered, as not to reach the aforesaid place, until about an hour after the time appointed for the meeting, to our great uneasiness. This meeting was, for the most part, held in silence; yet near the conclusion, I had some things given me to deliver, with considera­ble weight and gospel authority. I went next to Redstone, where the meeting was small, yet open and comfortable. From thence we travelled to Carmarthen, and next day to Swansey, about thirty miles, being a very rough open road; the day very stormy, so that we were exceedingly wet. Great care was taken of us, when we got to our friend Paul Bevan's house, so that, through mercy, we received but very little harm. On first-day, being the 22d, we attended their meetings: that in the fore­noon was held in a silent labour. In the afternoon I had a close searching testimony to bear, tending to stir up and rouse friends to more zeal and fervor of mind; and was favoured to get through to satisfaction. On third-day we had a poor small meet­ing [Page 227] amongst a few friends at Freeveraque. I had nothing to administer, but an example of silence. We went after meeting to Pon­typool, and next day had a precious open meeting there. The testimony of truth going forth with good authority and clear­ness, was exalted, and the upright in heart were sweetly comforted in the enjoyment of the Lord's pretence, returning him the praise, who is worthy for ever! On sixth-day, the 27th, we crossed the Severn at the New-Passage, and went that night to the widow Young's at Earthcott; had a hard trying meeting there next day; after which we went to Bristol, and on first-day the 29th, we attended three meetings there; the two first were held in a painful distres­sing silence, and the last also, except a few words near the breaking up of the meet­ing. This was the first of my visiting that city, and a time not easily to be forgot by me. It was indeed a season of sore mourn­ing and lamentation, in a sense of their great declension. But very little to be seen or felt of that plainness, pure simplicity, humility, and contempt of the world, so conspicuous in their worthy predecessors, who trampled upon the glory of this world, counting all as dross and dung, in compa­rison of the smiles of the Lord's counte­nance, and being cloathed with the beauti­ful garment of his salvation. Oh, how was the choicest vine planted, made to spread, [Page 228] and mightily to prosper, through great sufferings and persecution, in that city, in early times; sufficiently, one would think, to have deeply established the permanency thereof, and to have recommended its su­perior dignity and excellency to many ge­nerations! May not that of the apostle to the Galatians, be justly applied to them? viz. ‘O foolish Galatians! who hath be­witched you, that you should not obey the truth? Before whose eyes Jesus Christ hath been evidently set forth, &c. Are ye so foolish, having begun in the spirit, are ye now made perfect by the flesh?’

I parted with my companion at Bristol, and turned my face homewards, taking meetings in my way to London, at French-hay, Corsham, Chippenham, Caln, and Read­ing; in all which I had considerable open­ness, largely, and with good authority, to publish the doctrine of truth, to mine own peace, and I hope to the comfort and help of many; though in some places my spirit was much pained with a sense of prevail­ing indifference and lukewarmness, in this day of ease and outward plenty. On seventh-day, the 5th of the 8th month, I got to London, and staid their meetings on first-day. After which I returned home, and found my dear wife and family well, to our mutual comfort; being thankful to the kind hand of providence, whose goodness attends those who trust in him, both in [Page 229] heights and depths; taking care of their bodies, souls, and those outward benefits he hath bountifully favoured them with; af­fording real comfort therein, with his bles­sing, which maketh truly rich, and adds no sorrow with it. I was out this journey about eight weeks, and travelled about 740 miles, having been at about forty meetings.

I have preserved very little or no account of short journies and service in this and the adjacent counties; in which, however, I was divers times engaged to labour, both at quarterly and other meetings, for the re­viving ancient zeal and diligence. But, alas! the inordinate love of worldly enjoyments, good in themselves, covers the minds of many professors, like thick clay, who are exceeding hard to be made sensible of the chiefest good, so that I have often feared some of them will not hear, until the Lord is provoked to speak, with a louder voice, in judgment, which they will not be able to turn aside from, or any way to shun. Many in our society, as in others, having departed from the life, rest satisfied in a profession of religion: some also have de­parted from the power and form too, in a great degree; neither appearing one thing nor another, Could they see themselves as judicious persons see them, shame and confusion of face would cover them.

The next considerable journey I have any account of, was entered upon the 27th of [Page 230] the 8th month, 1753, in order to visit friends in some parts of Yorkshire, Lanca­shire, Westmoreland, &c. I met some friends at Walden, who with myself were appointed by the quarterly-meeting to visit that monthly meeting for their help. I was largely opened in the meeting of wor­ship, to set forth the beauty, order, and excellent harmony of the several members in the church of Christ; and truth had considerable dominion therein, to our great comfort, as it prepared our spirits for close and painful labour with wrong spirits in the meeting of business, who had the boldness to plead the payment of tythes to be jus­tifiable, because required by the laws of the land; not considering the gross absur­dity of making human laws to be preferred before the laws of Christ, however contrary thereto, and enjoined as an absolute rule for Christians; unless they suppose it impossi­ble that any human laws can be made con­trary to Christ's laws, which is equally absurd; as well as that such an opinion tends to invali­date the great sufferings, and martyrdom of all those, who gave up every thing they had in this world, and even their lives, rather than actively comply with the laws of the land, when they believed them inconsistent with the nature of Christianity, and therefore a transgression of God's law. But the ground of that misapprehension, which such reason­ers fall into, appears to be upon a pre­sumption, [Page 231] that the source of property is in the law, viz. that the laws of the land can alienate the right of one, without ren­dering him any equivalent, and give it to another, who had no right therein before: whereas right and wrong are immutable, and cannot be altered by human laws, which only grant people aid to preserve and recover that which of right appears to belong to them; so that human laws cannot bind the consciences, any further than they are consistent with the laws of God. When a sincere Christian is persuaded they enjoin any thing contrary to the perfect law of liberty in his own mind, he may not ac­tively resist, but passively suffer the penalty thereof, whereby he faithfully bears his testimony against the iniquity of such a law, and so far contributes to have it removed. Now paying tythes under the gospel, being an antichristian, popish error, the laws enjoining their payment being grounded upon a supposition, that they are due to God and holy church; how then can any clearly enlightened person pay them in any shape, as he thereby assents to that great error, and contributes to support it, to the great scandal and abuse of the Chris­tian religion, and that noble, free, disin­terested ministry, instituted by our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ; whose direction in that case is, ‘Freely ye have received, freely give?’ Much more might be said [Page 232] to manifest the absurdity of such a plea for the payment of tythes; but that I would not be tedious, hoping there are not many amongst us so blinded by the God of this world, as to adopt such an argument. Truth prevailed in the meeting, and the testimony thereof was exalted over all such spirits. Praises to our God for his gracious assistance, mercifully afforded to all those who put their trust in him alone! I pro­ceeded on my journey, and had meetings at Godmanchester, Oakham, and Leicester; I had close searching labour, in order that careless, lukewarm professors might be stir­red up, and awakened to a sense of their states. The testimony of truth also, flow­ing forth at times, as a refreshing stream of encouragement to the mourners in Sion, and sincere travellers thitherwards. From thence I went to Nottingham, and had a meeting; the Lord graciously favouring with wisdom and utterance, to divide the word aright to the several states of those present. Truth greatly prevailed, oversha­dowing the meeting to the rejoicing of many hearts. Next day I had a small meeting at Furness in Derbyshire, wherein I had close labour with indolent professors, who, neglecting their own proper business, were too much depending upon the labours of others, to their great loss, as well as, that such unwarrantable dependance greatly tend­ed to load and depress the life in those con­cerned, [Page 233] making their exercises much the greater. The next meeting I had was at Matlock, which was large; the greatest part were people of other persuasions; it was, through the blessed efficacy of the word of life, an open good time, and the doctrines of truth were largely declared; shewing, that the world by wisdom knows not God, as well as how and to whom he is pleased to make himself known. The meeting was generally pretty much affected with the virtue of truth, which was emi­nently extended that day, and I hope would not be easily forgot by many. I went from thence to Sheffield, and attended their meet­ings on first-day, which were large. In the morning my spirit was deeply baptized into painful sense of the empty formal state of some, as also the undue liberties of many others. I was made willing and resigned to go down into sufferings on their ac­count; that if it pleased the Lord, I might be the better qualified to administer effectually to their several states, as experi­ence hath taught me repeatedly, that I could not speak feelingly to mankind for their help and recovery, any other way. At the afternoon meeting I was largely concerned to lay their several states open before them; it was a blessed and seasonable opportunity, tending much to their awakening to a sense of duty, and I think it may, with thank­fulness, be said, truth was over all. The [Page 234] next meeting I had was at Highflats, which was large, there being a numerous body of plain friends, as to the outward appear­ance, belonging thereunto. It was a labo­rious meeting, but through divine favour, there was strength afforded, to lay before them in a close pressing manner, the great danger of resting contented in a decent form of religion without the life and power thereof. I hope it was a profitable time to many. I went from thence to Brighouse meeting, wherein matter and utterance were given, tending to rouse the indolent, and to encourage the truly concerned for truth's prosperity. The next meeting was at Rau­den, which was very large and open, and the testimony of truth had great dominion. I had a pretty open meeting next day at Bradford; after which I went to visit a friend who was very low and weak in body, few expecting her recovery. I felt the pure virtue of the holy anointing with her, and had it given me to signify, that I did believe the Lord would raise her up for further service, which accordingly came to pass. I went from thence to Leeds, and attended their meetings on first-day. In the forenoon the testimony of truth was greatly exalted, in setting forth the power and efficacy of living faith: it was a glori­ous time, truth being over all. In the afternoon, it was thought several hundreds attended, mostly of the people called metho­dists. [Page 235] I was quite shut up as to ministry, I thought, in order to set an example of the important duty of silence to friends and others. The meeting concluded with an awful solemnity, which I hope was profit­able to many. I went from thence to Skip­ton, where the meeting was large, and the power of God's eternal truth went forth in a searching awakening testimony, as well as in a refreshing stream of consolation to those who stood in need of encouragement in their travels towards the city of God. I hope it was a profitable time to many. I had a small meeting next day at Airton; it was a heavy painful time of silence in the fore part; but the Lord was pleased to ap­pear, and afford ability to search some bar­ren professors, by opening their states to them, with which they seemed somewhat affected; but alas! how hard it is to reach effectually unto those who are settled as upon their lees, living in a state of mind that can rest satisfied in an empty profession. Next day I had a pretty large meeting at Settle: there I found the life of religion much depressed with an earthly formal spirit; but through divine goodness, truth arose and prevailed over it for the present, and was exalted, as being the one thing needful. I went from thence to Lothers­dale, where I had a very large meeting; the Lord enabling me, otherwise a poor helpless creature, to bear a thorough testi­mony, [Page 236] suited to the various states of those present; and his glorious name was exalted above every name. From thence I went to the house of my beloved friends Jonathan and Margaret Raine, at Trawden; whom, for their tender regard to me when I want­ed succour both for body and mind, I have heretofore, more than once, had occasion to make mention of; as likewise of the Ecroyd's family. We greatly rejoiced in the opportunity of one another's company once more; truth having nearly united us in our former acquaintance. I staid there­about something more than a week, attend­ing several meetings there and at Marsden Height; wherein, especially at some of them, the Lord was eminently with us, opening the wells of salvation, that we might drink together, and sing praises to him the fountain of all good. I had great openness in my service amongst them; and we took our leave of one another in a sweet sense of God's love uniting our hearts one to another. On second-day, the first of the 10th month, I set out for Lancaster, in order to be at their quarterly-meeting, being accompanied by my friend Jonathan Raine. I was at their monthly-meeting there on third-day, where I had some con­siderable service. Fourth-day in the morn­ing was held their meeting of ministers and elders; which was to comfort and edifica­tion. I found myself concerned to set forth [Page 237] the nature of true gospel ministry; as also, to point out some dangers which might, without a steady care and watchfulness, at­tend those exercised therein. It was, I hope, a profitable opportunity to some pre­sent. The same day was held the quarter­ly-meeting, wherein the Lord was graci­ously pleased, according to his wonted good­ness, to appear for the help of his sincerely concerned labourers; as, blessed be his wor­thy name, he is found of those that truly seek him, and doth not fail those who lean upon him, and not to their own under­standing, nor to former experience of his assisting power and wisdom. Truth was great­ly in dominion and friends much edified, the unity of the one spirit being livingly en­joyed. I went next day, accompanied by Samuel Fothergill, William Backhouse, and William Dilworth, to the quarterly-meeting at Kendal. The select meeting for ministers and elders was held that afternoon; I had some good open service therein, on the nature of gospel ministry, and the mysteri­ous workings of Satan in his transforma­tions. It was a time of edification and comfort. Next day was held the quarterly-meeting; in the fore part for worship, and after for the discipline of the church, where­in I had some service. Things were but low: we had a large meeting in the even­ing, both of friends and others; it was, through the pure efficacy of divine virtue, a blessed opportunity. I was largely open­ed [Page 238] in testimony concerning Christ, the di­vine light, which enlightens every man coming into the world. It ended in solemn prayer and praises to almighty God; our friend Samuel Fothergill being engaged therein, in a very powerful and affecting manner. I staid at Kendal, to attend their first-day meetings; at both which, especial­ly the latter, I was very largely opened to declare the truth with power, which affected and tendered many hearts, there being a great number of friends, mostly of a younger sort, in that meeting; it hav­ing been stripped, like many other places of late, of divers substantial elders. My labour was very earnest, that the rising youth might come rightly under the yoke of Christ, that they might be really pre­pared and fitted to succeed those who are removed hence, having finished their day's work. I went from thence, accompanied by several friends, and had a meeting at Grayrigg, to good satisfaction. The testi­mony of truth went forth with clearness and good demonstration, tending to awaken the careless, as well as to strengthen and encourage the honest-hearted. I returned to Kendal, and went next day, accompa­nied by many friends, to a general meeting at Windermoor. The Lord's blessed power was livingly felt in that meeting, whereby I was enabled, from the expressions of our Lord to Nicodemus, to shew the neces­sity [Page 239] of regeneration or the new birth; a doctrine highly necessary to be pressingly recommended to the youth in our society, and carefully weighed by them, lest any should vainly hope for an entrance into the kingdom of God, by succeeding their ances­tors in the profession and confession of the truth. A lamentable error! many I fear have fallen into, imagining they are God's people, without his nature being brought forth in them; or, as saith the apostle, being made partakers of the divine nature, and escaping the corruptions that are in the world through lust. Great opportunity have such, by education, the writings of our predecessors, and also by the gospel ministry the Lord hath been pleased to bless our society withal, to collect and treasure up a great deal of knowledge in the specu­lative understanding part, even to profess and confess the truth in the same words or language made use of, by those who really learned it in the school of Christ. This is no more than an image or picture of the thing itself, without life or savour; there­fore an abomination to the living God, and his quickened people. I have touched the more closely on this head, being apprehen­sive the danger is very great, which the ri­sing youth are exposed to, by dwelling se­curely and at ease, as it were, in houses they have not built, and enjoying vineyards they never planted; for great are their ad­vantages [Page 240] above others, if rightly improved; otherwise, this must increase the weight of their condemnation. I have divers times looked upon the mournful condition of those who trust, as above hinted, in the religion of their education, to be aptly set forth in the holy scriptures, by an hungry man dreaming that he eateth, and behold, when he awaketh, his soul is empty. Oh, that all may deeply and carefully ponder in their hearts, what they have known in deed and in truth, of the new birth, with the sore labour and pangs thereof! I cannot conceive, if they are serious and consider the import­ance of the case, but they will soon disco­ver how it is with them in this respect, by observing which way their minds are bent and thoughts employed, whether towards earthly or heavenly things. Those who are born from above, or risen with Christ, which is the same thing, it is natural for them to seek those things which are above; their affections being fixed thereon. So, on the other hand, that which is born of the flesh is but flesh, and can rise no high­er than what appertains to this transitory world; for flesh and blood cannot inherit God's kingdom; and it is said, those who are in the flesh cannot please God. The apostolick advice therefore, is to walk in the spirit; that is, let the spirit of Christ be your guide and director, how to order your lives and conversation in all things; for the [Page 241] children of God are led by his spirit. I hope to be excused in dwelling a little on this subject, having often greatly feared, that the descendants of the Lord's wor­thies who were full of faith and good works, should take their rest in the out­side of things, valuing themselves on being the offspring of such: a sorrowful mistake which the Jews fell into! May all duly consider, that it is impossible to be the children of Abraham, unless they do the works of Abraham.

Truth was greatly in dominion that day, and many hearts were much tendered and contrited before the Lord; to whom be everlasting praises, Amen! The next meeting was at the Height, where I had close rousing service, in order to awaken careless formal professors. The day follow­ing I had a large meeting at Coltis, near Hawkshead; where I was favoured with great openness upon the nature of true faith, and that it must be evidenced by good works; for faith, when only an assent or consent of the mind to principles of reli­gion true in themselves, being alone, is dead, as a body is without the spirit. The power of truth had great dominion, it being a time not easily to be forgot. The next day I had a meeting at Swarthmoor; there also I was led to speak largely of faith, viz. of historical faith, implicit faith, and to set forth the nature of that faith [Page 242] which was once delivered to the saints; being their victory over the world and all the corruptions thereof. It works by love, to the purifying of the heart, and when the heart is made pure, we can thereby see God. ‘Blessed are the pure in heart, said Christ, for they shall see God.’ And his apostle said, ‘By faith we come to see him that is invisible.’ It is plain from the holy scripture, that it pro­ceeds from a divine principle in man; for it is the evidence of things not seen, and the substance of things hoped for. No man can possibly please God without it. O that mankind would carefully examine them­selves, whether or no they be in this faith! If they be in it, they cannot be strangers to Christ, inwardly revealed; for he dwells in the hearts of true believers by faith; his kingdom being within, where all his laws and ordinances are discovered, clearly understood, and willingly obeyed. No complaint, when this faith is received and held in a pure conscience, of hard things being required, or his commandments being grievous; but a soul endued with this powerful principle, can say with sincerity, the Lord's ways are ways of pleasantness, and his paths are paths of peace. It was a good time, and I hope profitable to many. The next meeting I had was at Preston, near Kendal; there I was earnest­ly concerned to stir up friends to more [Page 243] faithfulness and a closer union one with another. It was a laborious time, but the blessed truth prevailed and carried through, to mine own ease in a good degree. I went from thence to Briggflats, near Sed­burg. The meeting was large, and for some time heavy and afflicting; but it pleased the great Master of our assemblies to arise, with­out whose gracious help his poor instru­ments can do nothing to any good pur­pose. It was a solemn awakening time; I hope to be remembered by many. I had a meeting next day at Ravenstondale, which was a laborious trying time: my way was shut up as to ministry; friends seemed too much at ease in a profession. When this is the case, the life of religion is exceedingly de­pressed; so that those who feel its state, must suffer therewith, until it please the Lord to raise his pure seed, in judgment against evil in people's minds: then man falls under for the present, and confesses to that name or power given under heaven for his salvation. But alas! he soon denies it again, by giving way to a contrary power; an enemy to God and his own soul. In such ups and downs, changes and conflicts, by the working of contrary powers in their minds, many weary out their days in vain, because they will not resolve to choose the good, and to eschew the evil, that they might be established upon the rock of ages for ever. The next day▪ I had another meet­ing [Page 244] at Preston; it was a time of close la­bour, yet through gracious help, I hope it was a serviceable meeting. I went from thence to Yeoland; this was a suffering time, much of the testimony given me then to bear, went forth sharp against such who were strong and confident in profession, without real experience of the living vir­tue and holy efficacy of God's eternal truth, to quicken and season their spirits. We find it very hard to gain any entrance on such. The testimony is often felt to rebound, which in low times is a great dis­couragement to the poor instrument. Here the faith and patience of the gospel must be exercised. I understood after meeting, that the state of some present had been re­markably spoken to that day, which tended to humble my mind in thankfulness before the Lord, for his gracious help and guid­ance. After these exercising painful times, doubts are apt to enter, and fears to possess the mind, lest we have been mistaken in what we apprehend the Lord required of us to deliver. (I say us, as I do not doubt but it has been the experience of many others, as well as mine.) This ought to be carefully guarded against, lest the poor instrument sink thereby, below its service, by giving away its strength and sure de­fence. The soul's armour and weapons being thus imprudently given away or cast off, our spirits are weaker than those of [Page 245] others, and consequently fall under them. Here that dominion, in which there is abi­lity to teach, may be lost. There is great danger also, on the other hand, of being too confident and secure, as I have observed some, after they have darkened counsel by a multitude of words without right know­ledge, and exceedingly burdened the liv­ing, appear quite chearful and full of sa­tisfaction, seeming as if thoroughly pleased themselves: which is a lamentable blind­ness, and discovers them to be at a great distance from the dictates and holy impres­sions of truth. This is what all ought earnestly to pray they may be preserved from, walking carefully in the middle path, retaining a jealousy over themselves, with a single eye to God's honour, and the pro­motion of his truth. Then will their feet be shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace, and will appear beautiful as upon the mountains. I went from Yeoland to Lancaster, and attended their meetings on first-day, where I had good open service, truth being comfortably in dominion, and friends thereby nearly united one to ano­ther. From Lancaster I went to the fol­lowing meetings, Filde, Frekleston, Pres­ton, Langtree, and Ashton. They were generally small, and the life of religion at a very low ebb. I was favoured with strength to discharge the service required, in a close painful labour for their help and [Page 246] recovery. But alas! great is the declension in those parts, and I fear but little laid to heart. The next meeting I went to was at Hartshaw, being a general meeting, which was very large, and although some­thing heavy and painful in the fore part, yet, through divine goodness, it proved a solemn serviceable meeting, and by strength and wisdom received from above, divers weighty gospel truths were delivered, to the comfort and edification of many. I had that evening a large meeting at War­rington; but, as heretofore in the same place, I felt their life and dependance was too much upon and after declarations. I found it my duty to disappoint that spirit, by sitting the whole time in silence. I went from thence to my valuable friends John and Joshua Toft's, near Leek in Stafford­shire, having Samuel Fothergill for com­pany and guide. I had a serviceable meet­ing at Leek; my labour was close in plain dealing with some, who appeared to me too much exalted in their own wisdom and conceit of themselves, whereby the simplicity of the truth was too much over­looked by them. On fifth-day, the 1st of the 11th month, being accompanied by Joshua Toft, I went to Stafford, and had a small poor meeting there. Next day in the evening we had a meeting at Tamworth, which was large, being chiefly made up with the considerable inhabitants of the [Page 247] town. The public service thereof fell upon my companion, with which I was well pleased, but found my mind not clear of friends belonging to that meeting, and therefore desired to have a meeting with them next day, at a friend's house, as I was desirous to have friends only. I had close searching service amongst them, yet to my comfort and great relief in the end. On first-day, the 4th, I was at Birmingham meetings; the forenoon was a good open time, wherein the testimony of truth was exalted; but the afternoon proved a heavy painful meeting; my way was quite shut up as to ministry. Now apprehending myself discharged from further service in this journey, on second-day morning I set my face homewards, and got to Northamp­ton that night, and next day to Hitchin, and got home on fourth-day, the 7th of the 11th month, finding my dear wife and fa­mily well; being thankful, as we had great cause, to the fountain of all our mercies, for his providential care over us, when outwardly separated for his service sake. I was from home this journey, about ten weeks and three days, in which time I travel­led, by account, about 760 miles, and was at about fifty-five meetings. In the year 1754, I travelled with my esteemed friend John Churchman, through Hampshire, the Isle of Wight, and part of Surry; the parti­culars whereof I cannot at present find; [Page 248] but I remember it was the last of his travels in this nation, and that we were nearly united in the service; the power and wis­dom of truth being livingly and comfort­ably with us, enabling us to labour with diligence for the promotion of truth, and our own peace. In the fore part of the year 1756, being in company with my esteemed friend Peter Andrews from America, sometimes visiting meetings in the city of London, I was seized with a violent disorder; it was with considerable difficulty I got home, and soon took my chamber, where I continued many weeks under great afflic­tion of body, and also of mind at times, which I have divers times experienced as a further trial of my faith and patience. The Lord has been pleased to withdraw his comforting enlivening presence; I have thought rather more so in those times of bodily afflictions, than others; for wise ends, best known to himself. Oh! who can understand or conceive the anxiety of the mind when this is the case, except those who have felt the same? But, through divine favour, it was not so with me always, especially in the last of my great illnesses, which was the latter end of 1758, when the joys of heaven so opened upon my soul, as I had never known before, which made me willing to hope that I was near entering into the full fruition thereof. How strong were my desires then to be dissolved, and to be [Page 249] with Christ for ever! Ready to say, now let thy servant depart in peace▪ for mine eyes have seen thy salvation! but I was not then accepted herein, neither was my mind after­wards free from some fears and doubts, that I had offended a gracious God, by an over-anxious desire to be removed from a mili­tant to a triumphant state. The example of our Lord (though he was the only be­gotton Son) in addressing the Father, is highly worthy to be ever remembered by us, in all our desires and prayers, viz. ‘Nevertheless, not my will, but thine be done!’ The above hints may fall into the hands of some poor afflicted persons, to whom they may afford comfort, by observ­ing, they are not quite singular in their trials, and from thence, through the divine blessings, receive some encouragement: which is my reason for penning them, as well as many other remarks in the course of this journal; even on my most inward and hid­den trials. I have had great cause to bless and praise the Lord, many times since, when I have observed the great advantage of those very pinching seasons of affliction, how much they tend to refine, and to esta­blish the soul upon the rock of ages, yielding the peaceable fruits of righteousness to those who are properly exercised thereby. I had very little health from the time that I was taken before-mentioned, for about two years; yet was enabled, in 1757, to visit [Page 250] friends meetings in Kent, Sussex, and some few meetings in Hampshire, &c. I set out from home the 12th of the 7th month, and crossed the River Thames at Gravesend, where by appointment I met my friend Joseph Taylor, and with him Joseph Wood, and Stephen Jackson, all from London. We went that afternoon to Rochester, where about six in the evening we had a meeting, there being a meeting-house; though I think but one person (then) a young woman, who made profession with us. Many others came, and there was an openness to declare the doctrines of truth largely amongst them, which I hope was not altogether in vain. From thence we all went to Canterbury, except Stephen Jackson, who returned home. We had a meeting there, made up chiefly of professors with us. The testi­mony of truth went forth in a close search­ing manner, and, through mercy, it was exalted over all of a contrary nature. The Lord had the praise, and his sincere follow­ers satisfaction and comfort. We had a meeting next at a place called Burching­ton, where there was a meeting-house, but none of our society living in that place; the people filled the house, and a pretty many out of doors; they appeared, in gene­ral, a low ignorant people; yet the Lord, with whom there is no respect of persons, opened the doctrines of the gospel largely, and in a reaching affecting manner, by [Page 251] which many seemed to be tendered. Next day we had a meeting at Drapers, near Margate, which was small, and things low as to the life of religion. In a very small meeting in the evening at Deal, I had some close service; after which, one person gave me sufficient cause to see there was need of it. The next meeting was at Dover, being on seventh-day in the evening, as I was desirous of being at Folk­stone on the day following. Truth opened doctrine and counsel for their help and edification, there being some lately convin­ced of our principles, who appeared tender and hopeful. I had good satisfaction amongst the few friends in that place. At Folkstone the meetings were large, but the life of religion mournfully low and borne down, not only with those things com­monly called undue liberties in many, but also, with the form of religion, without the power of it in others. I had (as it were) a threshing instrument put into mine hands, and was enabled to discharge the service re­quired, to my great ease and relief; for my spirit was exceedingly loaded and bowed down at that place. Oh! what pity it is, that old professors, instead of being as pil­lars in the house of God, and as Aarons and Hurs, bearing part of the Lord's great work (so happily and gloriously begun in the earth) should be a means of obstructing the same, and by the carnality of their [Page 252] spirits, burden and greatly depress the word of life in the messengers of Christ, sent in order to carry it on amongst mankind: thereby rendering themselves altogether un­worthy to be named by his name, to taste of his dainties, or to live under this latter, and as glorious a manifestation of evangeli­cal light and truth, as was ever extended to mankind! Is not the great design of the Almighty obvious, in gathering us as a people into his fold, to sit under his teach­ings, and consequently under his glorious manifestation, showering upon us great plenty of rain from above, and heavenly dew as upon Hermon's hills, viz. that we might be as the garden of the Lord, full of fruitful plants and fragrant flowers, send­ing forth a sweet smell, yea, to be as a fountain of gardens, and wells of living water, and streams from the goodly beauti­ful mountains of Lebanon: for it is writ­ten, ‘Out of the belly of him that be­lieves, shall flow rivers of living water.’ By which it plainly appears, that the Lord's chosen people are like conduits, channels, or water-spouts, to convey the water of life into the wilderness, that it may be­come a fruitful field, and that the desart land may come to rejoice, and blossom as a rose; also into the sea, viz. amongst the nations, languages, tongues and people ^*, [Page 253] to heal the fishes that are in this sea, viz. the backsliders and distempered of mankind. But oh, how slowly doth this work go on! And what a little progress it hath yet made, to what was expected by those valiants, who first engaged against Babylon in the morn­ing of our day, and made that kingdom shake! But many under the same profession in this day, are turned against the truth, and at the same time they pretend to main­tain its cause, they are supporting and strengthening the kingdom of Babylon all in their power, which is exceeding strange to think, and perhaps would not be believed by hundreds that really are doing it. The reason is, they first of all have taken some draughts of the wine, out of the whore of Babylon's golden cup, whereby they are so intoxicated, as not to know what they are doing; so that, when they think they are serving God, they are serving Satan. Were not the Jews drunk with this cup, when they dreamed that God was their fa­ther, and at the same time were in reality of their father the Devil, doing his works, when they thought they were doing God's works? This woeful mistake has been, and is almost general amongst mankind. When they suppress the measure of grace in them­selves, and drink a few draughts as above-said, they are then fit to follow antichrist whithersoever he will lead them; but he will take care, not to have much cross to [Page 254] the will of the flesh in his religion, lest they should be tempted to leave him; that being the very reason of the violence they have of­fered to the divine witness, which formerly rose up against them in their minds, viz. because they saw if they followed that, the cross must be taken up, and self must be denied. At this they have stumbled; and although little sense is at present retained thereof, by reason of the intoxication before mentioned, yet when they are summoned before the judgment-seat of Christ, and the books come to be opened, all will then see things as they really are, which do not at all change their natures, though, by a de­fect in the capacity before described they be not seen or understood.

It is worthy to be remembered, and deep­ly pondered by great numbers in our society, that it was the rebellion and unfaithfulness of the children of Israel, that was the cause of their being turned back again into a barren, doleful, howling wilderness, when near the borders of the land of promise. They doubtless might have then entered, subdued the idolatrous inhabitants, and taken full possession thereof, had they believed in and obeyed that mighty Jehovah, who with an outstretched arm had brought them out of the land of Egypt, dividing the Red Sea in mercy to them, and for the destruction of their enemies. But oh! what a long wilderness they had afterwards, for about [Page 255] the space of thirty-eight years, until all that people had fallen, except Caleb and Joshua, men of upright hearts, whom the Lord honoured with being the leaders of an entire new people to possess the land. Cannot the empty formal professors amongst us, who, under great pretensions, have suf­fered a heart of unbelief, a rebellious heart, that has departed from the living God, and embraced this present world, read their own condemnation in the before-mentioned ac­count? Shall they ever enter into the hea­venly Canaan? or be accounted worthy to carry on his glorious work in the earth? No, verily; but they must fall into great condemnation, except they repent, and re­deem their mis-spent time, and another peo­ple be raised to maintain this glorious cause, to whom the Caleb's and Joshua's in our society will be as leaders and directors; like Priscillas and Aquilas, to expound unto them (who enquire the way to Sion) the way of the Lord more perfectly; for I am fully persuaded, our society will not cease to be a people, nor the glory ever depart there­from wholly, as it did from the Jewish, and in a great degree the lapsed Christian church. I have no doubt, but that a people will be preserved from generation to generation, to contend earnestly for the faith once delivered to the saints, and to maintain the same with the doctrine and principle resulting there­from, so eminently revived in our predeces­sors, [Page 256] and most surely believed by us. So that when it shall please the Lord to awa­ken the nations, there will be no occasion to expect new discoveries, or other manifes­tations, but the Lord will shew where he feeds his flock, and where they lie down at noon. I do not expect the present le­thargy, and almost universal indifference of all denominations of Christians about reli­gion, is to continue very long, for the Lord's soul abhors it. I am fully persuaded he will arise in dreadful majesty, to shake terribly the earth; the power, wisdom, po­licy, and splendor thereof, and not only the earth, but the heavens also, that he may remove those things which can be shaken, that those things that cannot be shaken may remain. Then shall people see how empty and fruitless their religious pre­tensions have been. Then will their eyes and cries be to the Lord, to shew them the pasture of the flock of his companions. Then will mankind receive a kingdom which cannot be shaken. But, oh! the bitter cups that must be drank, and the phials of God's wrath that must be poured upon nations and kingdoms, before mankind in general will be humbled enough, to sub­mit to the yoke of Christ, and to learn of him, who is meek and low in heart. But he is Lord of lords and King of kings, and can turn and overturn, until the inhabitants of the earth are willing that he should [Page 257] reign whose right it is; ‘for when the judgments of the Lord are in the earth, the inhabitants of the world will learn righteousness.’

Great and marvellous hath been the Lord's condescension and goodness, manifested for our help and preservation many ways; one whereof I cannot well omit a short remark upon, viz. the reviving of ancient zeal for the promotion of discipline and good order, which I find is almost general throughout the society, that spirit of sound judgment, and the burning of that holy fire, which the Lord doth kindle in the hearts of the faithful, has never been wholly extin­guished, since we have been a people; though in some places, through the neg­lect of many, it hath burned rather faint and languid. This has of late been much augmented, and the number of those who will not take bribes (that is, through favour and affection pervert judgment) in­creased. I pray God, for his great name's sake, and his people's preservation, this good work may prosper! Publick ministry, though a great blessing, help, and comfort to God's people, may be shunned, evaded, and turned off by individuals: but the church cannot easily lose ground, under a godly, impartial administration of sound judgment, and dealing in the way of good order and discipline, as this brings judg­ment home; thou art the man. Here in­dividuals [Page 258] must condemn the evil, or be dis­united from the body, that it may not be infected or endangered by their defection. I went from Folkstone to Maizam, where I had a meeting, and some close searching labour, in order to awaken drowsy lukewarm professors. I had meetings also at Ashford, Tenterden, and Cranbrooke, where I found things exceeding low as to truth and friends, and but very little of the substance, or even form, to be met with. My spirit was much affected with sorrow and mourning, in viewing the deplorable estate of the society in this county; yet I endeavoured with patience to wade along in my service, and to discharge the duty required of me.

I then proceeded to visit Sussex. The first meeting I had in that county, was Gard­ner-Street; I could find but very few, if any, truly alive in religion there. I had hard close work with the unfaithful, in some important branches of our Christian testi­mony, to which I was immediately led; for I knew nothing of their state by outward information. I had meetings also at Lewes, Brighthelmstone, and Arundel. At all which places, I found the life of religion much depressed. My service was close and searching; but alas! carnal professors are very hard to be made sensible of their de­plorable condition. From Arundel I went to Chichester, where I had a meeting, and good open service, not only to stir up the [Page 259] careless to more fervent [...]our, but also to encourage and strengthen some tender-hearted travellers Zion-wards. It was, through the holy efficacy of truth, a bles­sed time, I went from thence to Alton, in Hampshire, and attended their first-day meeting. There is a large body of friends, amongst whom, the great Master of our assemblies opened doctrine and counsel, suited to their several states, and the blessed truth was in great dominion that day. The next meeting I had was at Godalming, where I had very close heavy service, being made sensible of much indifference and lukewarmness in some professors. It was often my lot to labour for the stirring up and reviving of such: but alas! it is hard work, yet sufficiently rewarded by the com­fortable returns of true peace, in a faithful discharge of duty. The next meeting I had was at Staines, which was pretty open and satisfactory: being livingly engaged to ad­minister suitably to the several states of those present. I went from thence to Uxbridge, where I had open thorough service, to good satisfaction. After which I went to High-Wickham, and had a heavy laborious meet­ing. The same day I had an evening meet­ing at Amersham, in which I had some service, though things were very low. Next day I had a meeting at Jordans, where the blessed truth had great dominion, and the testimony thereof flowed forth [Page 260] freely, in doctrine and counsel, for the help and comfort of those present. After which I went to London, where I staid the first-day meetings over. I attended Grace-church-Street in the morning, where I had good service, and the testimony of truth had great dominion. I went to Devonshire-House in the afternoon, where I had also a good open time to declare the truth; finding much ease and peace of mind. The service of this small journey being over, I returned home the next day, having been out about four weeks, at 28 meetings, and travelled about 350 miles.

The next journey I have any account of, was chiefly in order to visit the quarterly-meetings of Lincoln, York, Lancaster, and Kendal. I set out the 16th of the 6th month, 1758, and, by appointment, met Joseph Taylor at Cambridge, who was to be my companion as far as York. It being first-day, we went to their meeting in the morning, which was very small, and things exceeding low as to the life of religion. We went in the afternoon about ten miles to a general-meeting at a place called Over, which was large, and I was largely opened therein, in close awakening service, tending to rouse careless professors, of whom there seemed to be many at that meeting. We proceeded after meeting as far as Erith, and next day got to Spalding, in Lincolnshire, where we met our worthy [Page 261] friend Mordecai Yarnall from America, who was then on a religious visit in this nation, and Samuel Neal from Ireland. The 20th in the morning we set out for Lincoln quarterly-meeting, which began the next day about noon, and ended the day following. Truth is at a low ebb in this county, and the discipline in the main but poorly managed, and the conduct of divers professors administers cause of offence; yet we were, through the extendings of mer­ciful goodness, favoured with considerable openness, and pretty thorough service for their help, and to our own ease in a good degree. After this meeting was over, my companion and I proceeded on our journey towards York, taking Leed's first-day meet­ings in our way, which were large, very heavy, and laborious. My proper business was to wade under a great weight, occa­sioned by the indolent spirits of those who were unwilling to labour and bear their own burdens, in an example of silence. Next morning was held their monthly-meeting of ministers and elders, where I had close service; and the same day that for discipline, which was exceeding large, our society being very numerous thereabout. The testimony of truth was greatly exalted therein, in treating concerning Christ, the everlasting Rock upon which the church is built, whereupon only it can stand firm, against all the attempts of a potent adversary, [Page 262] and his emissaries. Next day we went to York, where the same evening was held the quar­terly meeting of ministers and elders. I had some open service therein, particularly to ministers. We were divinely favoured in the succeeding meetings, both for wor­ship and discipline, to our edification and comfort. From York I went towards Ken­dal, and was, in my way, at a yearly-meeting held on a first-day, in a large barn near Bingley; where (it was thought) were very near a thousand people of other religi­ous persuasions, besides many of our own so­ciety. I was largely opened therein to preach the everlasting gospel, in the autho­rity and demonstration thereof. The peo­ple generally behaved in a sober becoming manner, appearing well satisfied, which is too often the most we can say in our day, concerning such memorable opportunities; whereas, our predecessors might have added, perhaps, that several hundreds were con­vinced. However, we must content our­selves with the state or condition of the fields of the world, in our day: and al­though we cannot lift up our eyes as they could, to behold the fields white unto har­vest, yet let there be honest endeavours to contribute all in our power, for the bring­ing them forward in this respect, and leave the rest to the Lord, in whose hands alone are times and seasons. I had a meeting at Skipton that evening, to good satisfaction. [Page 263] I went from thence to Settle, and was at their monthly-meeting, where I had good service, and so proceeded, to Kendal, ac­companied by divers friends. The same day was held the meeting of ministers and elders, wherein our ancient worthy friend James Wilson, had excellent service, to our great comfort and edification. Their quar­terly-meeting of business was held next day, wherein I had good service, in the opening of gospel life and power. A bles­sed meeting it was. The Lord alone had the praise, who is for ever worthy thereof! I attended Kendal meetings the first-day following, which were very large, and pre­cious; the everlasting truth and its testi­mony, being exalted over all of a contrary nature, to the great comfort of the up­right in heart. I went, accompanied by our friend James Wilson, and many others, to their general meeting at Preston Patrick, which was very large. My service therein was close, searching, and laborious; not only in a sense of great lukewarmness and indifference in some, but also the heart-burnings, disunion, and secret smitings one against another, of others. It seemed to me, that spirit had subtilly prevailed on some accounted of the foremost rank, to their own hurt, and the wounding of the innocent life. My spirit had been pain­fully affected with the same sense of the state of that meeting, in degree, in my [Page 264] former visits to it; but never had so much power and comfortable dominion over the same, as at this time, wherein truth mightily prevailed, to the subduing, at least for the present, all that was of a contrary nature. Near the conclusion of the said meeting, our worthy ancient friend, before-mentioned, publicly testified, that the eternal truth of God was over all, exhorting friends highly to prize such blessed opportunities, and carefully to improve thereby.

In relating what has been done, in mar­vellous kindness and condescension, through me a poor weak instrument, towards the help and restoration of my fellow-mortals, I do sincerely desire, if any good is done, the Lord only may have the praise, honour, and glory; for he alone is worthy, and nothing belongs to the creature, but hu­mility, reverence, obedience, and laying the mouth as in the dust. I would be so un­derstood throughout the whole narrative, though not always expressed in words.

I went from Kendal to Lancaster. The quarterly select meeting for ministers and elders was first held; wherein our ancient friend James Wilson, before-mentioned, bore a noble, evangelical testimony, to the instruction, edification, and great comfort of friends. Next day was held their quarterly-meeting for discipline, in which, through the efficacy of divine power, I had some open weighty service. I cannot well for­bear [Page 265] remarking the great satisfaction and pleasure I had at this meeting, in behold­ing, and having the acceptable company of three honourable, worthy, ancient friends, viz. James Wilson, Lydia Lancaster, and Grace Chambers; who, I think, all bore living and powerful testimonies therein, in a very affecting manner, to the holy efficacy of that everlasting truth, which had been with them all their life long. Oh! it was a time of much humbling encouragement, to see their greenness and fruitfulness in old age. I looked upon them as patterns of primitive times and friends. There is some­thing wonderfully great and excellent, seen only by those eyes which the Lord hath opened, in the native simplicity of the truth, and that estate into which it gradually brings a man, who, in a total denial of self, hath fully given up to be formed by it. This I take to have been very much the case with friends in the beginning, which ren­dered them so very obnoxious to the spirit of the world; than which, there is nothing more opposite to a redeemed state: so that the more any are drawn out of the corrupt ways and spirit of the world, the more they are hated by it. This is obvious, when we consider the treatment which Christ our Lord, in whom the Godhead dwelt bodily, met with. If many in profes­sion with us are nearer in unity and peace with the world now, than our friends were [Page 266] formerly, let it not be understood as a token of their advancement in the nature and spirit of true religion; but the contrary, viz. that they are fallen nearer thereunto, and become more like it in spirit, though somewhat different as to the exterior part of religion, which the world cares not much for, when it finds, that in the main, we are making advances towards them. Our friends formerly delivered themselves in ministry and writing, in a plain, simple stile and language, becoming the cause they were sincerely engaged to promote; chiefly aiming to speak and write, so as to convey the power and efficacy of the pure truth, to that of God in the consciences of men. It is no small glory to the righteous cause we are engaged to promote, that it has made such a mighty progress in the world, upon a better foundation than that of human helps and learned accomplishments. The very first and most eminent instruments, raised to propagate the same, were illi­terate men, agreeable to what Paul deli­vers, 1 Cor. chap. i. ver. 26, 27, 28, and 29. May these things be weightily con­sidered by all those, who seem to aim at seeking credit to the society, by means of those outward embellishments, from which our worthy ancients were wholly turned, to seek and wait for that living power and holy authority, which alone is able to carry on the work of man's redemption to the [Page 267] end of time: the departure from which opened the door effectually for the apostacy to overspread; then human wisdom and learning became, in the estimation of de­generate Christians, essentially necessary to make ministers of the gospel. But the early ministers and writers in the Chris­tian church, became very eminent another way, as we have great reason to believe most of them were illiterate men; and such of them who had attained human learning, when the power of the gospel was inwardly revealed, laid all such accomplishments down at the feet of that power, to whom every knee must bow, and every tongue must confess: so that we find them counting all that as dross and dung, to which men, in their corrupt wills and wisdom, give the highest place for usefulness, as above hint­ed. And I think, some amongst us fall very little short of the same disposition of mind, though they do not care to own it in words; for I have divers times ob­served, some have but little relish or taste for the substantial truths of the gospel, in a plain simple dress; nor to read books, holding forth the same, unless they find some delicacy in the stile and composition. An honest substantial minister may wade into the several states of people, in order to bring forth suitably thereunto, in the native simplicity of the truth, and his labour herein be seen, gladly owned and [Page 268] received, by the circumcised in heart and ears, where his lot is cast; yet the sort of people amongst us above-mentioned, of which I fear there are many, do not know, nor much regard him, scarcely thinking it worth their while to attend the meetings such a one is engaged to visit. But if they hear of one coming who is noted for learning and eloquence, though perhaps far short of the other in depth of experience, what fol­lowing after him from meeting to meet­ing! Enough, if the instrument is not pretty well grounded, to puff it up with a vain conceit of itself, and to exalt it above measure. Some have with sorrow observed, much hurt has been done amongst us, by such great imprudence. I have often seen reason to conclude, popularity and common applause is no safe rule to judge of the real worth of a minister. Therefore, when I have heard much crying-up of any instru­ment, I have been apt to doubt its safe standing, and holding out to the end; which it cannot possibly do, if the same desire pre­vails to speak, as there is in such people to hear. I am persuaded, if such keep upon a right bottom, they will, at times, find it their duty to starve and disappoint such cravings after words.

I had an open satisfactory meeting at Lan­caster the day after the quarterly-meeting, in which the holy virtue of truth greatly united friends in the bond of love and peace. The [Page 269] 14th of the 7th month I set out, in company with my kind friends Jonathan R [...]ine and wife, William Dilworth, and Tabitha Ecroyd, and lodged that night at Watton, near Pres­ton. Next morning I took my leave of the above said friends in much near affec­tion, except William Dilworth, who ac­companied me to Warrington that day. The next, being the first of the week, I attended Penketh meeting in the morning, and Warrington in the afternoon. At both which, my labour in the ministry was heavy and painful, on account of the formal, lifeless state of too many, who, by their age and long profession, might have been as pillars in the church; as well as the chaf­finess, and want of solid experience by their not yielding to the visitation of truth, in many of a younger rank. Thus it is, when heavenly blessings have been showered down upon people, not duly improving thereby, they become more insensible than others who have not been so highly favoured. I was enabled to discharge the service re­quired, in a searching, awakening manner, to my own relief in a good degree. I went the next day to my worthy friend Joshua Toft's, near Leek, who had then lost his sight, but seemed fresh and lively in his spirit. We had great satisfaction in com­pany and conversation with each other. I staid one whole day with him and his bro­ther, and then proceeded towards Worcester, [Page 270] taking meetings at Dudley and Stourbridge. I had some open satisfactory service at the first, and a very laborious painful time in silence, at the other, where truth seemed to me much depressed by wrong things. On seventh-day I went from thence to Worcester, and attended their first-day meetings, and was mournfully affected there­in with a sense of lukewarmness in many professors, finding it very hard for the life and power of truth to arise into dominion, so as to make them sensible of their states. My labour was for the most part in silence, though I had some close public service. I went after the last meeting as far as Eve­sham, on my way to London, and from thence, the next day home to my dear wife, and found her well; which, together with other favours, I was, through infinite kind­ness, made a partaker of in this journey, bowed my mind in humble thankfulness to the bountiful author of all blessings, who is alone worthy of dominion and worship for evermore. I was from home about five weeks and five days, and travel­led, by account, 664 miles, and was at 37 meetings.

I have preserved no account in writing, of my travelling in the service of truth, after I returned from the last-mentioned journey, until the fore part of the year 1760, when I entered upon my journey, in order to visit the meetings of friends in the nation of [Page 271] Ireland a second time; having had it weightily upon my mind, at times, for some years. But when it drew near, I clearly saw the time fixed to set out, which I did the first of the 3d month, in the afore­said year, and went to London. The 2d being on first-day, I went to Grace-church-Street meeting in the morning. My business therein was to set an example of silence. In the afternoon I had good open service at Devonshire-House meeting. On second-day morning the 3d I went into the West-Chester stage coach, and arrived at that city on fifth-day night, the 6th. I went next day to Park-Gate, to inquire for a passage, where I found divers vessels ready to sail; yet the wind being contrary, it was uncertain when; some having already wait­ed near a month for a fair wind. I return­ed to Chester that night, and next day was poorly of a cold, having, since my great illness, been very tender in my lungs, and apt to be afflicted with an asthmatick dis­order; so that travelling, especially in cold foggy weather, became very unpleasant for me to bear, having endured considerable hardships in my journey from London, by such weather and the motion of the coach. But all was made up, in the sweet enjoyment of that pure love, which makes hard things easy and bitter things sweet. The 9th, being first-day, I was at Chester meeting, the number of friends being but [Page 272] small, and the life of religion very low; yet it pleased divine goodness to extend mer­ciful help, giving me openness in the springing up of life, to administer suitably for their advantage, I hope, if rightly im­proved. The 10th in the morning, having hired a guide and two horses, I set out for Holy Head, in order to take a passage for Dublin in one of the packets, and got thi­ther next day about six in the evening. Here I found one of the packets was to sail early next morning. I went on board the 12th, about six o'clock in the morn­ing, and landed at Dublin about six in the evening, the same day, having had an easy passage and civil usage on board, and was kindly received by my open-hearted friends Samuel Judd and family. I was pretty much fatigued with travelling, being also afflicted with a cold upon my lungs, which was aggravated by the thick sulphurous air of Dublin. Yet the pure virtue and holy anointing of the precious truth, carried through and over all weakness, both of body and mind. My soul being enabled to extol and magnify the God of my salva­tion, for his gracious support every way; for indeed, humanly looking and judging of things, it might not have appeared prudent, considering my weak and infirm state of body, especially alone, to have undertook such a journey; but the power of gospel love gaining the ascendency over all reason­ings [Page 273] and consultations with flesh and blood, made me willing to give up life and all, in answering the Lord's requirings, and to pursue what he was pleased to call me unto, as far as ability of body would admit. This is a great mystery to the carnal man, but it hath as real an existence in a re­deemed mind, as that a principle of self-love is the spring of action in an unredeem­ed mind. On sixth-day, the 13th, I went to the week day meeting at Sycamore-Alley, where humbling goodness was refreshingly near, and opened the doctrines of truth largely and livingly, to the comfort of many hearts. On first-day, the 16th, I went to Meath-Street in the morning, where I had thorough service, to mine own great com­fort and ease; though my spirit was much grieved, to view the havock made amongst friends in that great city, by undue liber­ties; but most of all under a mournful sense, that the dragon's tail had drawn some of the stars down again into earthly pollu­tions, and caused a bad savour. This was offensive to my soul, even as a nuisance in that meeting. May others harm and mis­carriages cause all the Lord's anointed to be very watchful. I went to Sycamore-Alley in the afternoon, where the meeting was very large. Silent waiting upon God was my service therein, in which I had peace and comfort; and towards the conclusion, there was an awful solemnity, in a remark­able [Page 274] manner, over the meeting, wherein the excellency of silent worship appeared. On second-day, the 17th, I went to Baltibois and had a meeting there next day. I had close rousing service therein; the testimony of truth went forth very sharp against haughty libertine spirits. There I met my good friend Abraham Shakleton, who tra­velled with me most of the time I was in that nation. Of him, I think, it may be said, as was of Nathaniel, ‘Behold an Israelite indeed, in whom there is no guile!’ He was a great comfort and help to me, and though he did not appear public­ly as a minister; yet he would drop tender advice at times, in families, in a very affect­ing manner. His whole conversation, looks, and deportment, was so leavened and tem­pered with the good, that I looked upon him as a preacher of righteousness where­ever he came. I went with him, after the abovesaid meeting, to his house at Bally­tore, where next day I had a precious open meeting, and good thorough service there­in; the blessed unchangeable truth being in dominion over all. The 20th I had a good serviceable meeting at Athy, and the next day another at Rathanyon, in which there was a wonderful manifestation of the divine power, and much clearness in opening the doctrines of truth; so that I believe there were few, if any, but were sensibly affected therewith. I hope such great extendings of [Page 275] favour will not be easily forgot. From thence I went to Edenderry, and was at their meeting on first-day, the 23d, which was a very large meeting, and the power and wisdom of truth was eminently mani­fested, in furnishing with ability, to divide the word aright to the several states in that great meeting. It was in much dread and weight, not sparing any rank or station in the society. All there, I believe, through divine favour, had some share of that day's work: I hope not easily to be forgotten. May the Lord alone have the praise! for he is the author of all the good that is, or can be done. The 25th I had a large meeting at Mount-Melick, in which I had thorough service. The labour was some­what painful, in a sense of indifference, and the insipid formal state of too many, as well as the pride and undue liberties of others; both which have sorrowfully pre­vailed in that nation; yet I found great ease and peace of mind, in the discharge of that weighty concern which was upon me for their help and recovery, and which I hope had a good effect on many. Next day I had a large meeting at Mount-Rath. I was en­abled to discharge the service required, in a searching manner, that careless professors might be stirred up to their respective duties, and ancient zeal, ardour, and beauty restored to the churches. From thence I went to James Huchinson's, where I had [Page 276] an open serviceable meeting; I hope to the comfort and help of many. The 28th I had a meeting at Ballinakill, where I had a good degree of openness, for the help and encouragement of friends in the way of well-doing; but things were very low there, as to the life of religion. I went after meeting to Carlow, in order to attend the province six weeks meeting. Many friends, from the several parts of the province, came to it. It was a large meeting, and considering the low declined state of things, we were favoured with wonderful extend­ings of heavenly power, wisdom, and living virtue, in order to heal and restore back­sliding Israel. Great and marvellous is, and hath been, the condescension of the Almighty to his people, through all ages! The doctrine of the gospel flowed forth freely to the several states of those present, and many were much humbled, in an aw­ful sense of the divine presence, which is the life and strength of God's people. I had a large meeting at the same place on first-day, the 30th, it was a blessed oppor­tunity of favour and saving help extended to those present: surely, if these high bene­fits are not duly improved, great will be the condemnation of those upon whom they are bestowed. I went from thence home, with my kind friends Robert Lackey and wife, and had the next day a precious open meeting and good service therein, [Page 277] at the house of our worthy ancient friend Samuel Watson, of Killconner. I went from thence to Ross, where, at the house of Samuel Ely, I had a low afflicting meet­ing, but little to be felt of the life of re­ligion. I was quite shut up as to ministry. From thence I went to Waterford, where on the 3d of the 4th month, I had a large meeting; it proved a time of close labour; yet I waded through to mine own ease, in a good degree. On the 4th, I had an open precious meeting at Clonmell. Oh, how the heavenly virtue did stream forth! in doctrine and counsel, for the help, encou­ragement, and stirring up of friends and others, to their religious duty. The great name of our God was adored and mag­nified. The 5th I went to Cork, and at­tended their meetings on first-day. They were large, and although the declension from the life and simplicity of truth is very great and obvious amongst friends in that city, and many under our name are much defiled with the love of earthly gratifica­tions, preferring their outward interest to that of religion; yet great was the extend­ings of divine love and favour for their help and recovery. The doctrines of the gospel were thereby largely and livingly opened, I hope to the comfort and help of many, causing the hearts of a sincere, up­right-minded remnant amongst them great­ly to rejoice with thankfulness. On third-day, [Page 278] the 8th, I attended a very large meet­ing there, both of friends and people of other religious persuasions; it being ap­pointed for the marriage of our friend Samuel Neal to a daughter of Joshua Beale, and grand-daughter of our worthy friend Joseph Pike, deceased. The fore part of this meeting was very cloudy and painful, but the sincere travail of the upright in heart prevailed with the Lord to arise; then his enemies were scattered, and the glorious powerful truth shone forth in its beauty, whereby the poor had the gospel to preach, in the blessed demonstration thereof. It was a time not to be easily forgotten; made so by his refreshing presence, who turned our water of affliction into the re­viving wine of his kingdom; to whom, for the multitude of his mercies to his church and people, be humble thanksgiv­ing, sincere obedience, and praises for ever­more, Amen! I went from Cork direct­ly to Limerick, where on the 11th I had a thorough open meeting, and the testi­mony of truth was greatly exalted, I hope to the comfort and help of many. I often much admired the divine condescension, in the open visitations of his unmerited love and long-suffering kindness, to a greatly revolted and backsliding people. But what we finite creatures cannot comprehend, of his unfathomable regard to the workman­ship of his hands, we ought to adore and [Page 279] worship him for, with reverence and awful fear. So be it, saith my soul, both in time and eternity. I went from thence to Kill­connen-Moor, where on first-day, the 13th, I attended their meeting, which was but small, and my service therein was very la­borious. The testimony given to bear went forth very sharp against wrong liberties, I was much afflicted, in a sense of the al­most desolate state of that meeting, which that worthy man John Ashton, being first himself convinced in that remote place, was the instrument, in the Lord's hand, by his savoury circumspect life and labour to gather. I had a meeting in the afternoon at Birr, where there are but few of our so­ciety, but many of the people called me­thodists, and soldiers came in. The gos­pel of life and salvation was largely preach­ed unto them. The necessity of the new-birth was urged and pressingly enforced. The nature whereof, from a degree of ex­perience, being set forth, the meeting ap­peared to be generally affected, and, I hope, it was a serviceable time. Some of the methodists did in words express their great satisfaction, after meeting, beyond what I choose to mention. On the 15th I had a very painful exercising meeting at the Moat. Great indeed was the distress of my mind, viewing the general hardness and insensibi­lity, as well as the vain frothy light spirits of some. I had very little openness, and [Page 280] scarcely any thing to deliver, but under a sense of the Lord's anger being kindled against them, by whom, if they do not re­pent, they will be rejected. Though, I hope, there were some few had a degree of tenderness and good desires; but, alas! it is a hard lot for such who have a sense of feeling, to be incorporated with a peo­ple generally so insensible of the life of re­ligion; but the Lord is all-sufficient for those who put their trust in him. From thence I went to the Freeman's, near Old-Castle, where, on the 18th in the morn­ing, I had a meeting held at their house, for our friends only, in which I had matter and utterance given suitable to the states of the few present, who were pretty much affected with the testimony of truth. In the afternoon I had a large meeting in friends meeting-house at Old-Castle. I understood after meeting, they were mostly papists. I had a large opportunity to pub­lish the truths of the gospel, with con­siderable clearness; shewing the necessity of obtaining victory over sin, through the power and efficacy of living faith in Christ; by whom only, full remission of sin is to be obtained, upon sincere repentance; shew­ing, in some measure, the great danger of supposing the Almighty hath delegated the power of forgiving sins to any man, or set of men whatever; that all who were desirous to be freed therefrom, must know the work [Page 281] of God's spirit in their hearts, to work that change, or to bring forth that new-birth our Lord taught Nicodemus the necessity of. The auditory were generally quiet and attentive, appearing to depart well satis­fied. One of the papists after meeting did to me express much satisfaction with the doctrine delivered. But I understood one or two priests were much offended there­with, yet they said nothing to me; so all passed off quiet, as was my mind, having sweet comfort in the labour of that day. From thence I went to Coothill, and the 20th was at their first-day meeting, where­in I was largely concerned in a close rou­sing testimony. It was very sharp against the inordinate love of the world, which, and other undue liberty, seemed to me to have almost laid that meeting waste. Their monthly-meeting of business was held that day, which to me was another token of their little regard to the great cause of re­ligion and virtue, that they could not find it in their hearts to bestow another day for transacting the weighty affairs of the church, which I have always observed to be the case, where friends are really alive in religion, and not narrowed up by the love of the world. It hath often appeared wonderful to me, how the professors of truth dare offer such an indignity to the infinite being, and his awful work, as to put it off until it suits them best, and when they are likely to suf­fer [Page 282] the lead disadvantange in that respect to their outward affairs. What is pointed out by the offerings under the law, being of the first year and without blemish? And what is meant by offering the first-fruits to the Lord? Oh, how ungratefully do some act, as if any thing, or any time, was good enough to offer unto him! I have observed in some places, though I can with com­fort say, it was but in very few, that they hold their monthly and quarterly-meetings in the afternoon, and having thus limit­ed themselves for time, they seem as if they could spare but little of it in silent waiting, to seek the Lord's blessed assistance, and in faith to look for the pour­ing forth of the holy spirit promised in this gospel-day. But I have observed them to enter on the business as they have come out of the world; moving in these weighty affairs in man's natural abilities, whereby darkness reigns, and the glorious light and life of truth is obscured, and they come to be so benighted, as to see no necessity to wait for it. Thus all living zeal, and every qualification for carrying on the Lord's work is lost, and vain man thinks he can do without it. I am well assured, by living experience, as well as the practice truth hath led friends into in all places (a few excepted) that it is the indispensable duty of our society, every where, to dedicate a week-day, viz. a day when they are not [Page 283] debarred by the laws of the land to fol­low their outward business, for transacting the weighty affairs of discipline and good order; and to meet in the fore-part there­of, men and women together, then and there to wait upon the Lord, for the virtue of his holy spirit; and when they have thus waited a proper time, then the men and women in their separate apartments, with awful fear, and a weighty care upon all their minds as in the presence of the Lord, to proceed in their respective parts of this great work; which is the Lord's, and cannot possibly be profitably done but by his immediate assistance. This I leave upon record, as my well-grounded testimony for God and his church. I attended what they called their monthly-meeting, and by looking a little into the state of things, I found them much out of order, and did not wonder at it, as I found they had dropped their week-day meeting. At my request the women were desired to be present, when much labour was bestowed for their help, particularly to revive their week-day meet­ing; they agreed to endeavour for it, and made a minute for that purpose in their monthly-meeting book. But, alas! the life of religion seemed to be almost lost; their state being confused and disorderly, by mixed marriages, and the neglect of dis­cipline. They appeared part one thing and part another; which, if it was so offensive [Page 284] to God, and so distressing to his people under the old covenant, how can it be less so now? But when people's views are car­nal and selfish, they regard none of these things, although the hazard is so infinitely great. I had a small poor meeting at Castle-shane next day, where, to my great sorrow and pain, I could not perceive any alive in religion. Some labour in testimony was bestowed, but to outward appearance it took very little effect. From thence I went to Thomas Greer's, at Dungannon, and on the 23d had a large meeting at Charle­mount, where I was concerned to declare truth, as utterance was given, in a very close searching manner; not without sharp rebukes to such, who, by defiling liberties, had brought an ill savour and caused the way of truth to be evil spoken of. My mind was comfortably relieved after the service of this meeting was over, being dis­charged of a heavy load. The next day I had a very painful and exercising meeting at Ballyhagan. The appearance of the pro­fessors was in general plain; but, alas! with respect to the life of religion, they seemed, in my view, for the most part, like pictures or images. Surely the blindness and stupi­dity must be exceeding great, if it be pos­sible for people in that state, to imagine or dream they are the people of God. I was, through divine favour, enabled to clear myself of them, by a sharp searching and [Page 285] close testimony, in the discharge whereof I had peace. The meeting was very large, as to number. The 25th I went to the province meeting of ministers and elders, held in Lurgan. My spirit was deeply affected therein, with a sorrowful sense, that some of the leaders of the people had caused them to err, and by their love for, and eager pursuit after worldly enjoyments, had large­ly contributed to obscure the way of the Lord, so that the serious inquirers after the paths which lead to peace, could not, by observing their steps, find them out. Oh, what a deplorable state that is! I was fa­voured with living authority and clearness, to discharge my mind towards such with great plainness, which seemed to fasten closely on some: may they profit thereby, and the end will be answered. The province meet­ing was held next day, in which I had weighty service. But, alas I they are far gone (a few excepted) from the life and power of religion; yet I found much good-will ex­tended for their recovery and help, and the heavenly power wonderfully opened my mouth, and enlarged my heart, to deliver suitable doctrine to their conditions, in which I had peace, and many were affected and reached therewith. Oh, how unwilling is the Lord to give up the offspring of his people! I attended Lurgan meeting on first-day, the 26th, which, through the divine manifestations of heavenly power, was in­deed [Page 286] a very awakening time to the unfaith­ful, as well as of sweet refreshment to the few mourners in and for Sion. I went after meeting to Lisburn, and had a very open satisfactory meeting there next day. The testimony of truth went forth in an affecting manner, to the tendering many hearts. It was a time of humbling en­couragement to the honest-hearted. The next day I had a very poor afflicting meet­ing at Hillsborough, things being very low there. The 30th I had a very large meet­ing at Ballenderry, in which I had tho­rough service. The testimony of truth went forth with much clearness and de­monstration, being, through divine favour, an eminent time, and many states spoke closely to, I hope to their advantage. On fifth-day, the first of the 5th month, I had a meeting at Moyallen, which was a painful cloudy time. The testimony delivered was very searching, in order to stir up careless professors, some of whom seemed, in a great measure, to have deserted the cause of religion, and to have too much embraced this present world. The 2d I set out for Dublin, in order first to attend the province meeting for Leinster, and then the half year's meeting, both to be held there in one week. I lodged that night at an inn in Dunlere, and next day got to Dublin. On first-day, the 4th of the 5th month, I went to Meath-Street in the morning, where [Page 287] truth greatly favoured, in opening doctrine and counsel, to the edification and comfort of many, as well as in caution and warning to the disobedient and lukewarm professors. In the afternoon at Sycamore-Alley, it pro­ved a laborious painful time of silence, to which, perhaps, the expectation and desire of the people after words might not a lit­tle contribute. On second-day, the 5th, was held their province meeting of mini­sters and elders. It was a painful heavy time, but, through divine favour, some relief was administered towards the con­clusion. Next day was held the quarterly-meeting for Leinster province, in which I had open thorough service, both in minis­try, and also in relation to good order and the discipline of the church. On fourth-day, the 8th of the 5th month, third hour in the afternoon, began their national meet­ing of ministers and elders, wherein the Lord was pleased to open profitable in­struction, to the great comfort and edifica­tion of many. Next day we had a meeting for worship in the morning, wherein di­vine favour was plentifully extended, and the doctrine of truth largely opened. The meeting of business for the whole nation was held in the afternoon, in which a de­gree of divine wisdom and strength were administered for our help in the manage­ment thereof. On sixth-day morning was held a large meeting for worship at Syca­more-Alley, [Page 288] which was wonderfully over­shadowed with heavenly goodness, and the testimony of truth went forth freely, being much exalted. In the afternoon the affairs of the church continued; and on seventh-day, both fore and afternoon were employed in them. Divine goodness was com­fortably near, for the help and recovery of a declined people, stirring up the hearts of some, as he did the heart of Nehemiah formerly, to seek the prosperity and welfare of the city of God. I found a considerable alteration for the better, by some reviving and growth in the life of religion, amongst friends in this nation. That painful flat­ness and insensibility, which I former­ly mourned sorely under a sense of, did not appear so generally to overspread the churches now, as then; though in some places it was rather worse than better; yet I think, upon the whole, things were mended in a religious sense. The Lord, in merciful kindness to them, not only sent divers substantial instruments from distant parts, to visit them; but also, as before noted, moved upon the hearts of some a­mongst themselves, to labour for restor­ing ancient comeliness, by visiting their monthly and quarterly, or province meet­ings, for the promotion of good order and discipline; the reviving whereof, in the wisdom which is from above, proves an ef­fectual means to increase and exalt the vir­tue [Page 289] and power of true religion. A concern of this nature came weightily upon the na­tional meeting at this time, in the feeling whereof, under the holy influence of hea­venly light, friends nominated a certain number to visit the monthly meetings in Leinster province.

I cannot well omit making a remark upon appointments, as I apprehend some have, by the subtilty of Satan, been pre­vailed upon to reject them: I believe all such do not design an injury to the society; but he who deceives them, intends there­by the obstructing that great and necessary engagement, of maintaining good order and discipline. I ardently desire, that all who undertake to move and act in the church of God, may be well informed what is the spring of action to them, and moves them therein. If it be the spirit of God, they dare do nothing against the truth, but all in their power in order to promote it, that being their greatest delight. But if it be self, it will seek its own honour, and be very fond of victory, and be disgusted when it cannot rule and carry matters and things its own way.

On first-day, the 11th, many country friends being yet in the city, we had, it was thought, the largest meeting known at such a time, for many years, and, by the blessed dominion of the everlasting truth, it was a time of great favour. The sincere-hearted were sweetly comforted, the [Page 290] disobedient warned, and in the free power­ful opening of gospel life, much doctrine and counsel were administered, tending to beget faith in the eternal power of God. The afternoon meeting was, for the most part, held in an awful solemn silence. On second-day was held a meeting of ministers and elders, wherein divine goodness was pleased to open the free fountain of life and healing virtue; in whom we had to re­joice with joy unspeakable and full of glory. His name was greatly exalted, mag­nified, and adored amongst us. After this meeting, apprehending myself now quite clear of any farther service, at this time, having, through infinite kindness, been much favoured and enlarged therein, through most parts of the nation, but more especially at the late great meetings in Dublin, I was very earnest in my mind to embark for England, and so to leave things whilst fresh and well; always having an aversion to loitering amongst friends until they flatten. But though there were seve­ral ships ready to sail for Parkgate, yet I could not get away till after their week-day meeting, on third-day, in Meath-Street; to which meeting, I must say, I went with considerable reluctance, for the reason above-mentioned. But we are very short-sighted creatures; for this meeting, notwithstand­ing my unwillingness to be at it, proved a memorable time: many country friends be­ing [Page 291] still in the city, it was a solemn taking leave one of another, in the precious flowing of the holy unity by the one spirit. Next day about noon, in company with seven friends intending for the yearly-meeting in London, I embarked on board the Kil­dare, captain M'Culloch, and landed at Parkgate about ten o'clock next morning, where we hired horses and proceeded to­wards London. But when we had travelled as far as Coventry, apprehending I might reach home, so as to have three whole days with my family before the yearly-meeting; and it being but about twenty miles more riding, I concluded therefore to do so; my kind friend Robert Lackey agreeing to bear me company. This being on seventh-day, the 17th, we got to Northampton that night, and staid their meeting next day, which was small, and the life of religion appeared to me very low there. The meeting was held in silence. I got home on third-day, the 20th of the 5th month, 1760, finding my dear wife and family in good health, to our mutual joy and thank­fulness to the Lord, who leads out, carries through, and brings home again in peace, those who trust in him. Blessed and praised be his worthy name for ever! I was in­deed largely favoured in the before-men­tioned journey, of which, for mine en­couragement to give up in humble con­fidence in the Lord's power, I had a clear [Page 292] foresight before I entered upon it, which I esteemed a high favour. I was from home about twelve weeks and three days, travel­led in that time upwards of 1300 miles, and was at about 58 meetings. Our friend Robert Lackey, myself and wife, went to the yearly-meeting in London, which began on seventh-day the 24th of the 5th month, for ministers and elders. An esta­blishment, which I hope will be of great service throughout the society in these na­tions; as inquiries are made at this meet­ing, by calling for answers from the seve­ral parts, to certain queries agreed on, re­lating to the conduct of friends in the sta­tions above-mentioned; and advice admini­stered as occasion may require. Common reason will inform us, that when the main pillars give way, the building must inevita­bly fall. It is therefore prudent to take due care concerning them. An eminent servant of the Lord wisely observed to this effect, viz. That there never was an apo­stacy from the life and purity of religion, until the ministers and elders gave way. How important then are their stations, and what great need have they themselves, and likewise the church, carefully to observe whether or no they stand upright, seeing so much depends thereon. On second-day following was opened the yearly-meeting of business, which continued, by adjourn­ments, most or all the week; being a solemn [Page 293] weighty meeting, of very great import­ance to the society: careful inquiries are there made, into the state thereof, in order to communicate such help, as in the wis­dom of truth may appear proper and neces­sary. I am free to give a short account here, of the beginning or rise of one very import­ant affair which came before this yearly-meeting, as I shall have occasion hereafter to make some mention of its progress and success, viz. A nomination of friends, to visit all the monthly and quarterly-meet­ings of friends in this nation, for their help, in promoting good order and discipline in the several parts. Upon reading the an­swers to the usual queries from the se­veral quarterly-meetings, great slackness and unfaithfulness in divers places in some weighty branches of our Christian testi­mony appeared, notwithstanding the great and earnest endeavours made use of by the yearly-meeting from year to year, by way of advice, caution, and counsel: the sense whereof deeply affected some minds, who, in humble prostration before the Lord, were ready to say, What wilt thou do for thy great name's sake, and to heal the back­slidings of thy people? A friend under this exercise, and an awful sense of the divine presence which was near, stood up, taking notice of the apparent defection above-hint­ed; and that as all the means hitherto used by the truly Christian labour of preceding [Page 294] yearly-meetings, had not proved sufficient to stop the declension, which seemed rather to increase; that now it behoved that meet­ing, deeply and weightily to consider what remained yet to be done for the help and recovery of the society, to its ancient purity and comely order, or to that import. This seemed to open the way for our worthy friend Joseph White of Pennsylvania, who was then upon a religious visit in this na­tion, to lay before that meeting what he said had been much upon his mind most of the time since he landed, and which seemed to increase in clearness and weight as that yearly-meeting drew near; and that he now found it was the proper time to deliver the same, viz. That the yearly-meeting do appoint a suitable num­ber of solid, weighty, judicious friends, to visit all the quarterly and monthly-meet­ings in England, therein to use their Chris­tian endeavours, in the love of God, for the promotion and revival of wholesome discipline, and the comely order of the gos­pel in the churches. Great was the awful solemnity which covered the meeting, dur­ing its deliberation on this very important affair. The weight of the heavenly power was so exceeding great and awful, that it was very hard for any contrary spirits to appear; yet objections against appointments for such services were advanced by some. It was therefore proposed, that friends who [Page 295] found a concern on their minds to engage in the said undertaking, would give in their names. The Lord's heavenly power being at work, like leaven, in the meeting, a wonderful time of divine favour it was, wherein about fifty-eight offered themselves accordingly.

Before I insert any account of the progress made in the above-mentioned ser­vice, I have to take notice of a journey into the West of England, which, in company with my friend Richard Brewster, I entered upon the 9th of the 9th month this year. We went to Plaistow monthly-meeting, where, unexpectedly, I had some pretty close service. Next day, being joined at London by my esteemed friend Thomas Corbyn, we proceeded on our way, in order to at­tend the circular yearly-meeting for the western counties, to be held at Wotton-under-Edge, in Gloucestershire, which be­gan on first-day, the 14th of the 9th month, and ended on the third-day fol­lowing. Many of our society from divers parts, attended, and a vast concourse of other people, who generally behaved in a becoming manner, carrying themselves very respectfully to friends, and I hope the meet­ing was in the main, serviceable; yet the heavenly power was not exalted to so high a degree, as those whose life and all is in it could have desired. It is that alone which is able to open people's way [Page 296] rightly to our Sion; not the finest and most consistent set of principles, curious­ly set forth and displayed without it. All ministers should therefore upon all oc­casions, eye that divine power as the only thing we stand in need of, otherwise the work will be marred. We went from Wotton to Ann Young's, at Earthcott, and had a close searching meeting at Thornbury on fourth-day. Things were very low there as to the life of religion. We had a meet­ing next day at Earthcott, wherein the testi­mony of truth went forth very sharp against dry, formal, and disorderly professors. Our friend Isaac Sharpless was at this meeting. We went from thence to Bristol, and at­tended their meeting on sixth-day, where truth and its testimony was excited over wrong things; and unfaithful, disorderly walkers, were, in the dominion and autho­rity thereof, warned, and the humble, sin­cere traveller Sion-ward, comforted: it being, through the divine blessing, a good, profita­ble time. In the afternoon was held their meeting of ministers and elders, wherein we had some very close work with a trou­blesome imposter, who had given friends there much uneasiness, by his unsavoury and unsanctified public appearances. The judgment of truth was set over him, though he was very unwilling to submit thereunto. On first-day, the 21st, we attended three [Page 297] meetings there; and notwithstanding the mournful declension so visible amongst friends in that city, yet the Lord graciously appeared for their help and recovery; open­ing the doctrine of truth in a clear and plentiful manner to their several states, with which many appeared pretty much af­fected. And although there is yet much cause to lament their degeneracy in too general a way, yet I hope and believe there hath been a considerable reviving in the best sense, amongst some of them, especially the youth, since I was there be­fore. On second-day morning we had a thorough rousing meeting at Portshead in Somersetshire, and in the afternoon a large meeting at Clareham; the latter was exceeding cloudy and afflicting for a con­siderable time; but at length, it pleased the Lord to arise and to give the word, with understanding to divide the same in a plain, powerful manner, and a very awakening time it was; it went forth very sharp a­gainst indifferency and empty formality, which greatly depressed the true seed in that meeting: I hope it was a profitable time. On third-day we had a very open, serviceable meeting at Sedcott; the testi­mony of truth flowed forth freely to the several states of those present. After meet­ing we went to Bridgwater. On fourth-day was held the quarterly-meeting for Somer­set. [Page 298] In the forenoon we had a large meeting for worship, both of friends and others; some previous endeavours, I under­stood had been used, to invite the neigh­bours, which, I think, was not well judg­ed, neither should I have encouraged it at such a time, had I been consulted. The leadings and pointings out of truth should be always minded, in calling or inviting people of other persuasions to our meetings; for I have sometimes thought them a bar in the way of dealing suitably with professors of the truth, and therefore it is my judg­ment, they should not be called to our meet­ings, unless those who travel in the service of truth signify their desire to have it so, to those who have the care of appointing meetings. The power of the gospel, open­ing and exalting the doctrine thereof, was livingly and comfortably extended in that meeting; yet I apprehended, other people were then rather in the way of our hand­ling the state of some professors there, in a manner truth would have led to, had friends been by themselves. The meeting of bu­siness followed, and was adjourned till the afternoon, wherein truth appeared to the help of those who know their sufficiency to be of God. We who were strangers, had good service therein. Next morning we parted with my friend Thomas Corbyn, who returned home, and my companion and I proceeded on our journey. We had a meet­ing [Page 299] at Taunton, on fifth-day morning, and at Milverton in the evening. At both which I had close service, tending to stir friends up to more lively zeal and religi­ous concern of mind. On sixth-day we had a painful laborious meeting at Welling­ton. The testimony of truth went forth very close and sharp against those, who, under the profession thereof, bow down to the world, and its perishing enjoyments. It appeared to me, the life of religion was much depressed in that meeting. On seventh-day we had a meeting at Cullumpton, which was a cloudy trying time most of the meet­ing; yet towards the conclusion, truth ob­tained the victory, and considerable domini­on over things of a contrary nature to itself. We went after meeting to Exeter, and on first-day, the 28th, were at two meetings there; and although their number appeared considerable, yet that holy living sense and weight of divine virtue which is the crown and diadem of all our religious assemblies, was very low, and little felt, through the too general slackness and lukewarmness of professors, consequently, not much could be done towards exalting truth's testimony a­mongst them. On second-day we went to Bo­vey, and had a poor, laborious meeting, there being very few, if any, that I could find, truly alive in religion. When that is felt to be the state of any meeting, oh! what [Page 300] pain and anxiety covers the hearts of poor travellers in the service of the gospel! The next day we went to King's-bridge, and on fourth and fifth-day attended the quarter­ly-meeting for Devonshire held there; wherein the great master of our assemblies graciously condescended to their very low, weak, and unskilful state, opening doctrine and counsel for their help; furnishing with close admonition to such in high stations, who either indulged themselves or families in undue liberties, tending to lay a people waste, whom the Lord, by an out-stretched arm, gathered out of the fashions and changeable customs of a vain world, to himself the unchangeable fountain of good. On sixth and seventh days we travelled through Plymouth and sundry other towns, to Penryn, in Cornwall, and had two open, precious meetings at Falmouth, on first-day, the fifth of the 10th month. On second-day, accompanied by many friends, we went to Penzance, where, on third-day, was held the quarterly-meeting for Corn­wall. Truth wonderfully appeared in that meeting, considering their low, weak, and unfaithful state. The testimony thereof was much exalted, and went forth with clearness and good demonstration to their states, and the meeting appeared to be much affected therewith. There was also some­thing very encouraging to the honest-heart­ed; I hope it was a time of awakening [Page 301] and profit to many. In the evening we had what was called a select meeting, for ministers and elders; but it was so far from select, that the service seemed to be wholly obstructed, by the crouding in of many who were not fit to be admitted into such meetings; where ministers and elders may, and often are concerned to use such freedoms, in advice, caution, and counsel, as would be altogether unsuitable for those who are raw and inexperienced to be privy to, as they might be likely to make improper use thereof. I laid before friends the hurt and disadvantage of such a promiscuous gather­ing, upon that occasion, and advised them to be careful not to lay waste the service of those meetings for the future; for I found myself much straitened, as I could not, with prudence, deliver what seemed to ap­pear before the view of my mind at that time, for the reason above-mentioned. On fourth-day, the concluding meeting was held at Market-Jew, wherein truth and the testimony thereof was comfortably ex­alted. But, alas! sorrowful is the declen­sion of the society in those parts, both as to number, and a holy living zeal; yet mer­ciful goodness was largely and affectingly extended for their help and recovery. From thence we took the following meet­ings in our return to Plymouth, viz. Austel, Li [...]kard, and Germans, where I found the life of religion mournfully low [Page 302] and depressed; yet the Lord was pleased to open the way to some, I hope profitable endeavours for their reviving, in the exer­cise whereof I had peace. I attended Ply­mouth meetings on first-day, the 12th. This was a very painful, laborious time, as but very little of the life and holy efficacy of true religion had place, most under our profession having made large advances to­wards the world, and but few endued with Christian courage to make a stand against prevailing undue liberties. The state of a meeting being thus, oh, how doth death, darkness, and insensibility gain the ascen­dancy! My spirit was deeply afflicted at that place, yet I was, through divine favour, enabled to clear myself of the service re­quired; whereby I had some relief. We travelled from thence directly to Exeter, and on third-day attended a meeting there, appointed for the accomplishment of a mar­riage. Truth mercifully opened the way to some satisfaction, in the discharge of the service required, to the advantage of the meeting. From thence we went to Chard, and had a very small poor meeting there on fifth-day morning, and was deeply affected with their low weak state. I had a pretty thorough serviceable meeting in the after­noon, at Ilminster; though I felt much pain of mind there also, in a sense of that which hath almost laid our society waste in some, and exceedingly hurt it in most [Page 303] places, viz. the inordinate love of earthly things; and resting satisfied in a profession of religion only. We took the following meetings in our way to Bath, viz. Yeovil, Long-Sutton, Grinton, Shepton-Mallet, Froome, Hallawtrow, and Belton; where things, as to the life and true feeling sense of religion, appear but low in general; yet merciful kindness was extended, in a live­ly, open, large, and powerful manner, both immediately and instrumentally, in order to quicken, restore, and turn a­gain backsliding Israel. On first-day, the 26th of the 10th month, we attended two meetings at Bath, which were indeed pain­ful and very afflicting, as the grandeur, friendship, and vain customs of this world, seem to have almost erased from most of their minds, the desire of seeking happiness in another: yet merciful condescension was remarkably extended, in some earnest and awakening endeavours, to bring them to a right sense of things. On second-day morning we set our faces homewards, where, to my great satisfaction I arrived on fourth-day in the evening, and found my dear wife and family well; having been out this journey seven weeks and two days, in which time, by account, we travelled upwards of 800 miles, and were at about 51 meetings.

Pursuant to the direction and appoint­ment of the yearly-meeting 1760, for visit­ing the monthly and quarterly meetings of [Page 304] friends in this nation; on the 11th day of the 1st month, 1761, my esteemed friends, John Emms, Matthew Mellor, Thomas Corbyn, and Joseph Taylor, joined me at Chelmsford, we having before agreed (by divine permission) to visit the monthly and quarterly-meetings of friends, in Essex, Suffolk, Norfolk, Cambridgeshire, Hun­tingtonshire, the Isle of Ely, Hertford­shire, and Bedfordshire. The next day, be­ing the 12th, our monthly meeting was held, wherein the above-named friends had good service, tending to promote discipline and good order amongst us. The blessed efficacy of the living word accompanied their honest labours, which rendered the same very acceptable to some, and I hope of general advantage for the promotion of truth. The 14th we visited Felsted month­ly-meeting, held at Stebbing; the state of which appeared very low and weak, through the defection and lukewarmness of many members, whereby the life of religion was greatly depressed; yet the Lord was graci­ously pleased to arise, for his great name and people's sake, in whose living power and wisdom much labour was bestowed for their help and recovery; a few sincere-hearted members amongst themselves, join­ing with us herein. The 16th we visited Thaxsted monthly-meeting, and by inquiry made, it appeared, many of their members were very slack and defective in divers [Page 305] branches of our Christian testimony; and most of the active members had but little experience in the essential qualifica­tions for effectual service in the church, which must all proceed immediately from the great Father of lights and spirits. It would be very absurd to imagine a less or inferior ability to administer justice and sound judgment, were necessary under this higher and more glorious dispensation, than was received by those who judged and ruled for God in the Israelitish church; it being evident the Lord was pleased to put his spirit upon those who had the weight of the affairs of that church upon them, both in their wilderness state of pro­bation, and after they quietly possessed the promised land. But the supernatural en­dowment, so essential as above hinted, is not within our reach as men, neither is it given to us, until we are emptied of our own wisdom, and divested of all depend­ance upon human accomplishments.

Our holy head was pleased to furnish us with wisdom and strength, suitable to the state of that meeting, for their information and help; and the blessed virtue of truth prevailed, to the tendering of their spirits. The next monthly-meeting visited was Coggeshall, on second-day, the 19th, but as I did not attend that meeting, I cannot say further concerning it, than that I un­derstood it was a serviceable time; much [Page 306] weighty advice and counsel being admini­stered, to mutual satisfaction and comfort. The 21st we visited Colchester monthly-meeting, where, though the life of religion appeared low, and several disorders had crept in, yet divine goodness was extended in a powerful manner for their help, en­lightening the spirits of some to search the camp, and to point out how to proceed in restoring that which had been turned out of the way. The 22d, Manningtree monthly-meeting was held at Colchester, in which, through the pure efficacy of heavenly love and wisdom, much fervent labour was be­stowed, for the awakening and stirring up the several members to a faithful discharge of their respective duties. But, alas! through the great unfaithfulness of many, discipline was but little maintained, in a manner agreeable to its dignity and worth; consequently the life of religion was very low. From Colchester we went to Edmund's-Bury, in Suffolk, and visited their monthly-meeting the 24th. It was a time of re­markable favour extended, truth bowing the spirits of friends into an humble, teachable state, and, at the same time, af­fording plenty of suitable counsel, which was kindly received by divers members of that meeting, with whom we had near union and great satisfaction; several being willing to engage in the work of reforma­tion, which appeared necessary. The 26th [Page 307] we visited Woodbridge monthly-meeting, in which the Lord, according to his wonted merciful kindness, appeared not only in spreading the awful canopy of his divine power over the meeting, but also, in graciously condescending to be a spirit of judgment and counsel, for the help and re­covery of a declining people; under the en­joyment of which divine favour, much labour was bestowed, and (as far as appeared) was well received. The 28th we visited Beccles monthly-meeting, where things ap­peared very low and much out of order; the spirit and wisdom of man appeared much to rule and act amongst them, which is fond of smoothing over, and daubing with untempered mortar, crying, Peace, when there is no peace. In this difficult mournful state of things, the divine helper, in whom our only dependance remained, was near, giving judgment to assign the living child to the proper mother, and to judge down wrong things, in whatever sta­tions they appeared. The 29th we visited Tivetshall monthly-meeting, in Norfolk, in which, though large, as being composed of many members, yet very great slackness and unfaithfulness appeared in divers important respects; notwithstanding which, we had, with thankful acknowledgments, to expe­rience the awful presence of the Lord, who is the only strength and sufficiency of his little ones; under the blessed influence [Page 308] whereof, great and deep labours were be­stowed, for the reviving our Christian dis­cipline, and promoting the good order of the gospel; the testimony of truth being maintained against wrong things in that meeting, with authority and clearness; the power thereof subjecting (for the pre­sent at least) all of a contrary nature to it­self. On the 2d of the 2d month, we visited the monthly-meeting of Wymond­ham, wherein, on the usual inquiries, things appeared very afflicting, through the great defection of many; the few who were con­cerned for good order, were weak and much discouraged, so that very little was done to maintain our wholesome discipline, by visiting and labouring with the un­faithful and disorderly walkers: yet the Lord, in great condescension, appeared wonderfully for their and our help, ex­tending much advice and counsel, and giv­ing us wisdom and strength to contend earnestly for the faith once delivered to the saints; which faith is to be demon­strated by works consistent therewith. The testimony of truth was greatly exalted over all such, as through a mean compliance with wrong things, had mournfully deviated therefrom. The 3d we visited their meet­ing of ministers and elders at Norwich, where the state of the members was in­quired into, by means of queries proper to such meetings; solid and weighty advice [Page 309] was given, where any deficiency appeared. Although I have not before now distinctly mentioned our visits to select meetings, yet we had such opportunities in most or all the monthly-meetings where such meetings were settled. On the 4th of the 2d month, we visited the monthly-meeting of Nor­wich, which was very large, consisting both of the men and women friends; it being our method, during our labours at the monthly-meetings, to have the company of both sexes. Through the over-shadowing of divine power, it was a solemn awful time, of which friends in general appeared to be sensible, as a remarkable stillness and patience was abode in, for the space of about six hours and a half, being the time of the meeting's continuance; though a motion was made sooner for our women friends to withdraw, lest some weak constitutions might be injured by long sitting, &c. yet their spirits being so stayed and bowed down under a sense of heavenly good, they did not accept the liberty given, but con­tinued to the breaking up of the meeting. We found a valuable body of friends in that city, and discipline, in the main, well supported; yet there appeared great danger of the prevalence of earthly-mindedness, in some, and grandeur and wisdom above the simplicity of the truth, in others; which, if not guarded against, might in­trude itself to act and govern in the church; [Page 310] of which friends were warned, and through the effectual opening of the fountain of wisdom and knowledge, much caution and counsel were administered, to mutual edi­fication and comfort. On the 6th of the 2d month we visited the monthly-meet­ing of North-Walsham, where we found an honest sincere remnant concerned to main­tain the principles of truth, by a conduct consistent therewith; yet a great defection appeared in some important branches of our Christian testimony; the monthly-meeting not having discharged its incumbent duty, by way of admonition and dealing with such members. Truth opened our way in much plainness and close labour, in order to bring the unfaithful to a right sense of their states, and to revive and promote our Christian discipline, as a means to restore ancient beauty, and a good savour amongst men. The path of the just, in which our worthy predecessors carefully walked, was clearly opened before friends in that meet­ing; the judgment of truth being set over those who had erred and strayed therefrom, in this day of outward ease and liberty. The 9th we visited Wells monthly-meet­ing, in which humbling goodness prevailed, to the great comfort and strength of the upright-hearted; in a living sense of the free extendings whereof, much labour was bestowed to restore good order and discipline in every part, by first endeavouring to re­move [Page 311] those impediments which appeared in the way. It was a time of sweet com­fort in a faithful discharge of duty. The 11th we visited Lynn monthly-meeting, wherein our spirits were deeply afflicted under a cloud of darkness, which seemed to over-shadow that meeting, occasioned by the prevalence of wrong things in many of the members, and their great neglect of the due execution of wholesome discipline. Much labour was bestowed in order for a regulation, but, alas! great weakness and unskilfulness appeared; neither was there that openness to receive help, which we could have desired in the general; may also add, we had fresh occasion to say, that nothing but an understanding renewed from above, is capable of labouring successfully for the maintaining our Christian discipline. Oh! that this important point was duly consider­ed by all active members. The 13th we visited the monthly-meeting of Wisbeach, in the Isle of Ely; it was a small meeting, as but few members belong thereto. By inquiry, it appeared, slackness and disor­der had prevailed on some, and things in general were but low; yet an openness was felt to receive proper advice and counsel, which, through the gracious extendings of heavenly help, was freely and largely communicated. We had cause to believe truth was at work in the hearts of a few, in order to prepare them for service; hav­ing [Page 312] ease and satisfaction in our labours a­mongst them, and hoping this visit would prove of considerable help to that meet­ing. The 17th we visited the monthly-meeting at Ives, wherein we had painful labour, and found things much out of order, which had caused darkness to be felt, and an ill-savour; some of the active members did not appear to us rightly to know what spirits they were of; however, we found they were not one with us in our service, which was indeed very close and searching to all stations in the church, as it appeared all had need of help, and to look more narrowly to their standing. Di­vine goodness was graciously with us, and carried us through, to our ease and satis­faction in a good degree. But, alas! we have sometimes cause to see, that our dis­cipline does not prosper when managed with unsanctified hands. The 18th we vi­sited Hadingham monthly-meeting, and found things very low, as to the life of religion, consequently as to good order and discipline; yet some appeared hopeful, tender, and desirous of a proper regulation in the affairs of the church, with whom we had good satisfaction in our labours for their improvement, which I hope was not in vain. The 20th of the 2d month, we, visited the monthly-meeting of Royston, in Hertfordshire; the state of which appeared much out of order; discipline was in the [Page 313] main neglected. Very deep and painful was our labour, under a mournful sense of that gross darkness which had prevailed, by reason of unfaithfulness; yet the Lord was graciously with us, and the testimony of truth was exalted over the heads of disor­derly walkers, and all those, who, by a mean temporizing spirit, had violated some principal branches of our Christian testi­mony. We were unanimously of opinion, that the monthly-meeting of Royston, in its present state, was too weak to manage the weighty affairs proper to a monthly-meeting, and therefore proposed their being joined to Baldock and Hitchin; which, upon a solid deliberation, was agreed to, and hath been since effected, to the great satisfaction of friends who have the pros­perity of truth at heart. The 23d we vi­sited Hertford monthly-meeting, in which heavenly wisdom and merciful help (as at other places) were largely extended, to the encouragement of a few sincere labourers amongst them, as well as to the warning and stirring up of careless, unfaithful pro­fessors: for indeed, there appeared much slackness in too many, in not improving those talents God had given them. The 24th, we visited those under our profession at Coterhill-head, called a monthly-meet­ing; but, alas! upon inquiry, we found but very little done of the business proper to a monthly-meeting; neither was it held [Page 314] in due course, but rather occasionally, for some particular purposes; and when the state of the members appeared, we did not marvel thereat, seeing most of them were unfaithful in regard to that important testi­mony, against tithes and other anti-chris­tian demands of that nature: other great disorders also had crept in, nor can any other be reasonably expected, where per­sons are so void of a right understanding, as to sacrifice that noble testimony; they have not strength to maintain other branches in a consistent efficacious manner, so that where this defection hath prevailed, we have observed the most essential part in religion (amongst us as a people) has fallen with it: meetings for worship and discipline are neglected, and if sometimes held by such, they are to little good purpose; plain­ness and self-denial are departed from: this hard, dark, tithe-paying spirit is so blind, as to see but little in any branch of our testimony, wherein there is a cross to the carnal mind. Upon solid consideration we did not think, that using endeavours to regulate that meeting, in its situation at that time, would answer any good purpose; but the great thing pointed out to us in the light of truth, was its being dis­solved, and that the members thereof might be joined to Hertford monthly-meeting; which had been endeavoured for several years, both by their quarterly-meeting, [Page 315] and also several committees of the yearly-meeting, which had not, till now, proved successful, as the consent of most of the members could not be obtained▪ but this meeting, through divine favour, was won­derfully overshadowed with a solemn weight of heavenly power, which awed and tender­ed their spirits, and at the same time merci­fully enabled us clearly to demonstrate, that they contended only for the name of a monthly-meeting; seeing the service of such a meeting was not answered, scarcely in any instance. They at length generally yielded, and a minute was made to propose a junction with Hertford, which is since effected, to the great ease and satisfaction of friends. I cannot well avoid remarking here, the very great hurt and obstruction to the progress of truth, which I have divers times, with sorrow of heart, ob­served to arise by some active members from private views, strenuously with­standing the pointings of divine wisdom, for the help and preservation of the body, which doubtless is in the Lord's sight, a crime of a very offensive nature; therefore all should greatly dread being in any degree guilty thereof. Let us therefore, at all times, carefully examine what ground we act upon in the church of God, whe­ther we always preserve the single eye, being cloathed with that pure charity which seeketh not her own, and filled with that [Page 316] universal spirit, that carefully promotes the good of the whole, without respect of per­sons. The 25th we visited Hitchin month­ly-meeting, where we found a valuable solid body of friends, and discipline well maintained in most of its branches. Hea­venly goodness over-shadowed that meeting, whereby understanding was given to admi­nister suitable caution and counsel; particu­larly to point out the great danger of sitting down at ease, in a becoming decent form, even after being eminently favoured, both with the dew of heaven and the fatness of the earth; notwithstanding which, there must be a persevering in an earnest labour for daily bread, seeing nothing be­yond this can be attained by us, whilst in a militant state. On the 27th we visited the monthly-meeting of Ampthill, in Bed­fordshire, the Lord's awful presence being near, as, through infinite mercy, was gene­rally the case; this opened the way for a close and diligent inquiry into the state of that meeting. Things appeared low and pretty much out of order; the active mem­bers having here, as in many other places, too much neglected a deep and painful la­bour for a better regulation. Endeavours were used, in order to stir up and provoke to love and good works, by diligently ex­tending a care over the whole flock, that so all might be brought into the comely order of the gospel. On the 28th we visit­ed [Page 317] Luton monthly-meeting; it was small, slackness and the want of right zeal ap­peared; also some disorders crept in, yet there seemed openness in the minds of friends to receive advice and counsel, which, through divine aid, were largely administered; and I hope the labour of that day was beneficial to divers of the mem­bers, and may prove a lasting advantage to that meeting. The 2d of the 3d month, we visited Alban's monthly-meeting, held at Charley-wood, where, on the usual in­quiries, things appeared very low and much out of order; yet divine favour was largely and livingly extended for their help and re­covery; in an humble sense whereof, much endeavours were used to promote a better regulation; first, by the active members taking heed to themselves, that they might be endued with ancient zeal and fervour of mind; then they would take the over-sight of the flock, not by constraint, but willing­ly: this willingness, through a neglect of seeking that divine power which alone can bring it forth in the mind of man, hath been much lost or departed from, by many, and appears to be greatly wanting in most places; this, without doubt, is one prin­cipal cause that so general a defection hath prevailed. Had the foremost rank stood faithful in the authority of truth, they would have been as a bulwark against undue liberties, and happy instruments to have [Page 318] preserved the body healthy, and in beautiful order. But, oh! how shall I set forth, and sufficiently admire, the marvellous con­descension of infinite goodness, which so eminently manifested itself in all the meet­ings we were concerned to visit, in order to bring back again the captivity of his people, to build up the waste places, and to beauti­fy the house of his glory. May such evi­dent tokens of his merciful regard make deep and lasting impressions on all minds, lest the Lord be justly provoked to cast many off, and move such to jealousy by those who are now no people. One very sorrowful instance of much degeneracy, be­ing an inlet for many other wrong things to creep into our society, was the great neglect of divine worship, especially on week days; some week-day meetings being wholly drop­ped, and in many places where they are kept up, attended by few; and by what ap­pears, many do not seem to think it their duty to attend them at all, nor even first-day meetings, when small difficulties present. This discovers remarkable ignorance of the great importance of that indispensable duty, as well as of the great need all have, of a daily supply from the Lord's bountiful hand. As these opportunities of inward retirement and humble bowing before God, have, by experience, been found times of unspeak­able refreshment, which flows from the presence of the Lord, who has graciously [Page 319] promised to be with those who meet in his name, even where the numbers are but two or three, hereby strength is administered, which enables us to stand our ground in the Christian warfare. It is no marvel there­fore, that the neglect of so important a duty, is a cause of much weakness, de­priving people of a necessary defence against numerous and potent enemies which war against the soul. Here he that goes about like a roaring lion, and also as a creeping subtil serpent, prevails, in order to lay the society waste; and whilst many are asleep in carnal security, he finds opportunity to sow tares amongst the wheat. Very deep and servent were our labours in this visit, to promote diligence in this most import­ant duty, as a great means, under the divine blessing, for the restoring ancient beauty and comeliness throughout the society. This opportunity at Charley-wood, finished our present visit to monthly-meetings; we having requested the quarterly-meeting to which they belonged, to adjourn, in such order, as to be visited in course by us at one journey, to begin in Luton, for Bed­fordshire, which accordingly was held the 8th of the 4th month, 1761, John Emms, Thomas Corbyn, Samuel Scott, Joseph Row, and myself attended the same, and laid before the quarterly meeting, in writing, the state of their monthly-meetings, as the same ap­peared to us by their answers to the quar­terly-meeting [Page 320] queries, and other inquiries made in our late visit, with sundry remarks thereon; and through the over-shadowing of heavenly power, we were fervently con­cerned to bring the weight of the declined state of the society there, upon the meet­ing, wherein an engagement of mind was revived for a reformation: may the same continue and increase. On the 10th of the 4th month we visited Hertford quarter­ly-meeting; where our friend Joseph Tay­lor, who had been indisposed, joined us. Having previously drawn up the state of their monthly-meetings, as the same ap­peared to us in our late visit, with re­marks thereon, we laid it before the meet­ing, which they took into their solid con­sideration, and a solemn time it was: the Lord's power being livingly felt, it made a remnant willing to arise, that the breaches made in that excellent hedge of discipline, set by divine wisdom about us as a people, might be repaired; that the heritage be not laid waste. On the 14th of the 4th month, we visited the quarterly-meeting at Ives, for Huntingtonshire, Cambridgeshire, and the Isle of Ely; where, having drawn up the state of their monthly-meetings, as the same appeared to us in our late visit, with some remarks thereon, we laid the same before them, with earnest labour to awaken the active members, to a lively sense of the sorrowful declension found within [Page 321] their borders. It was a painful exercising time, great insensibility having prevailed over many; yet I believe it was a season of comfort and relief to a living remnant, who travail for the prosperity of truth a­mongst them; may their number increase! We had the returns of sweet peace in the discharge of our duty, and departed with chearfulness of mind. On the 21st of the 4th month, we visited the quarterly-meet­ing for the county of Norfolk, held in the city of Norwich; where, as usual, having drawn up the state of their month­ly meetings, with remarks thereon, the same was solidly laid before the meeting; wherein divine goodness was manifested; in the wisdom and strength whereof much earnest labour was bestowed, in order that all, the active members especially, might be stirred up to an exertion of godly endea­vours, for restoring comely order and dis­cipline, in divers very weak meetings with­in their county; not to be at ease in their ceiled houses, whilst the ark of the testi­mony of God was exposed to reproach, by the defection of many under the same pro­fession. It was a good time, and I hope serviceable to some; yet we could not help lamenting, that the memorable opportu­nity we lately had at Norwich monthly-meeting had not made greater impression than appeared by some not very agreeable in­stances in this meeting, relating to their [Page 322] fully uniting for the county's help, as there was apparent necessity for the same. The 24th of the 4th month, we visited the quarterly-meeting of Suffolk held at Wood­bridge, and laid before them in writing the state of their monthly-meetings, as the same appeared to us in our late visit, with some remarks thereon. Much labour was bestowed in the free extendings of divine love, which was comfortably shed abroad in that meeting, that friends might be thereby stirred up to use endeavours for a general reformation, in which fervent la­bour was bestowed, and close admonition extended to such as knew not their own spirits subjected by the spirit of Christ, but dared to presume to move and act in the affairs of the church of God, by the strength of their own understandings as men: these, not having true zeal, can wink at wrong things, great disorders, and flagrant unfaithfulness, smoothing all over, and blending all together deceitfully, crying Peace, and all is well, when it is evidently otherwise. Oh, how doth the Lord abhor such unsoundness! surely then his people should see the weight and authority of his power standing over such. A principal cause of desolation and waste in the house and heritage of God, is the want of more prepared stones for the building, hewn and polished in the moun­tain. But great inconveniency arises, when some are made use of as stones for the [Page 323] building, in their natural state, which ren­ders them unfit materials to erect a house for the glory of God to abide in; so that what such build, is nothing but a habita­tion for anti-christ to dwell in; for he will content himself in any form of religion, whilst he can keep the power out of it. His first subtile working in the mystery of iniquity is, to persuade the minds of men, there is no need of any more power and wis­dom than they have as men; that if they will exert their endeavour, they may be useful members; thus withdrawing gra­dually from the fountain of living water, to hew out cisterns to themselves which will hold no water. Oh, how dry and insipid are all their religious performances! and what they do, is only to beget in their own image, carnal lifeless professors like them­selves; these are very apt to be doing, being always furnished; but the true la­bourers must, in every meeting, and upon all occasions that offer for service, receive supernatural aid and the renewed under­standing, by the immediate descendings of heavenly wisdom and power, or they dare not meddle. Where there are but two or three in each monthly-meeting, carefully abiding in an holy dependance upon God, to be fur­nished for his work, great things may be done by his mighty power, in and through them. This is evident, by observing the state of meetings where such dwell, though [Page 324] all is not done they could ardently desire, as praised be the Lord, there are many yet up and down, who know and experimentally feel their sufficiency for every service in the church to be of God. The 28th of the 4th month, we attended the quarterly-meeting I belong to, held at Coggeshall, for the county of Essex. Having drawn up the state of the several monthly-meetings in writing, with remarks thereon, it was laid before this meeting; much solid and weighty endeavours being used for a gene­ral reformation, by the earnest labour of our friends on the visit, which was very edifying and comfortable to the honest-hearted amongst us. We drew up a sum­mary account of the state of the society in the counties before-mentioned, and our sa­tisfaction in that solemn undertaking; with thankful acknowledgment of the Lord's gracious assistance through the whole, which was read in the yearly-meeting, 1761. Be­fore I close this account, it may not be amiss to say, that such was the effect of our labours in most or all the monthly-meet­ings, that committees were appointed of their own members, to visit particular meetings, and also individual members, for their help, as occasion might require. The quarterly-meetings also appointed large committees to visit their monthly-meet­ings and others, as they found freedom, for their assistance. A few days after the [Page 325] yearly-meeting in London, 1761, Thomas Corbyn, Joseph Row, and myself, set out, in company with divers other friends, on their return from the yearly-meeting, in order to visit the monthly and quarterly-meetings of friends in Yorkshire, Lincoln­shire, Nottinghamshire, Derbyshire, and Leicestershire; Matthew Mellor joined us at Oatby, near Leicester; Joseph Taylor having concluded to meet us in Yorkshire. On the 24th of the 5th month, we visited Balby monthly-meeting, held at Sheffield, and found, to our comfort, a living body of friends therein; yet much slackness and defection appeared in many members or most ranks. Truth opened and largely furnished with wisdom and strength, to lay before them the dangerous consequence of some prevailing and undue liberties. Those advanced in age and profession, were intreated and laboured with in much ear­nestness, to be more zealous and diligent, in a godly care over themselves and the flock; as those that must shortly give an account to the great shepherd. The 25th we visited Pontefract monthly-meeting, held at Highflats. Here was a very numerous body of friends, whose outward appearance was very becoming our self-denying pro­fession; and I really believe this plainness, in a considerable number amongst them, was the genuine product of a well regu­lated mind; yet I fear, in too many, it was [Page 326] more the effect of education, which, however, I would not condemn, where people are not prevailed upon by the subtilty of Satan to take their rest therein; since the form must follow the power, and not the power fol­low the form. We had close labour, in order to rouse those who had settled down in a false rest, and also to promote a better regulation in some respects; yet I think it might be said that discipline, in most of its branches, was pretty well maintained in that meeting. It was a time of high favour; counsel and admonition were plen­tifully extended. The 27th we visited Brighouse monthly-meeting, held at Brad­ford: here Jonathan Raine and William Hird joined us. This meeting was exceeding large; some slackness and defection appeared, yet in the main, discipline and good order were well supported, in divers branches. This was indeed a time of signal savour, as the canopy of divine power and love oversha­dowed this large assembly, wherein much fervent labour was extended, that all might be brought into, and preserved in, that humble self-denying way which leads to lasting peace and happiness; and that none might rest satisfied in a form of religion, without the daily quickenings of heavenly life, whereby only the daily sacrifice can be offered, and the abomination that makes desolate kept out of the holy places, viz. the heart of man made and preserved holy [Page 327] by the powerful presence of God; no lon­ger can it be so, than his presence is there. The 29th we visited Knaresborough month­ly-meeting, held at Rawden. This was also very large, perhaps near five hundred of both sexes attended, and near as many at each of the before-mentioned meetings. Here we found a weighty, solid body of friends, who were zealously concerned to preserve discipline and good order on its ancient bottom; yet there was also a very heavy, clogging, lifeless body, at rest in a profession, in whom little or no living con­cern appeared, to keep undue liberties out of their families, and to shew exemplary diligence in religious duties. Divine good­ness, as at other times, was eminently mani­fested, in which, abundance of sound ad­vice, caution, and counsel, were freely ad­ministered, wherewith many hearts were deeply affected, being made willing to arise, in order to promote a reformation where things appeared out of order. The 1st of the 6th month, we visited Settle monthly-meeting; a laborious exercising time it was, in a deep and painful sense of the numbness and formality of too many members, and the great decay of primitive zeal; yet, through the merciful arising of heavenly power and wisdom, ability was received to administer suitable advice, warning, and counsel, in order to awaken the careless, lukewarm professors, as well as to extend [Page 328] comfort and relief for the encouragement of a sincerely concerned remnant amongst them; that so, what appeared out of the holy order of the gospel, might be regulated. The 3d of the 6th month, we visited Richmond monthly-meeting, held at Ais­garth; the number of members here was very considerable, yet the life of religion seemed at a low ebb; that sorrowful mistake, of imagining themselves God's people with­out the real sense of the indwelling of his holy spirit, and of being the children of A­braham without the faith and good works of Abraham, having, I fear, very much pre­vailed upon the posterity of faithful wor­thies who are gone to their rest. In those parts, great slackness and defection in some very important respects appeared in many, who, through the powerful efficacy of the everlasting word, were closely and very pressingly admonished to more care and diligence. Great endeavours were used, that our Christian discipline might be more duly put in practice; a living remnant a­mongst themselves, heartily joining with us in our deep labours for promoting that salutary end. The 5th, Thirsk monthly-meeting was visited by us; Joseph Taylor joining us here. We were now seven in number, which we did not find too many, the work we were engaged in being very weighty and laborious. In this meeting, a remnant were sincerely concerned to main­tain [Page 329] discipline and good order, in the spirit and life thereof; yet great lukewarmness and many deficiencies appeared; an earthly carnal spirit having much the ascendency in parents; rawness, insensibility, and a de­viation from plainness, in divers of the youth; which caused us deep and painful labour; yet, through the descending of heavenly virtue, we were enabled to speak closely to their states, which, I hope, had a good effect on some of them. This op­portunity afforded much relief to our spi­rits, and we went away with peace. The 8th we visited Gisborough monthly-meet­ing, held at Kirbymoorside; where a very large number of members attended, with an outward appearance becoming our holy profession, and we found a truly concerned remnant amongst them: but at this, as well as at other places, we had, with sorrow of heart, to view the great desolation that an enemy had made in the time of outward ease and liberty, which could not prevail upon our worthy predecessors, by depriving them of their liberty, in jails and stinking dungeons, separation by banishment and otherwise, of those in the nearest ties and con­nexion of life; nay, the loss of all their out­ward substance, and the lives of many, could not deter them from maintaining their testi­mony for God in public worship, and other things; yet he hath mightily prevailed on many of their inconsiderate offspring, who [Page 330] seem to have very little besides the husk left to feed upon. Divine goodness was wonderfully extended, in which much fer­vent labour was bestowed, and an awaken­ing time it was. The foundation of the builders upon the sand was shaken, and Jesus Christ, the everlasting rock and sure foundation, was exalted, as the only safe rest and defence of his people. The 11th we visited Malton monthly-meeting; the state whereof appeared very low, and things relating to our discipline much out of order; divine goodness being near, our minds were strengthened, and our mouths opened, in earnest endeavours for their help and recovery; a small remnant amongst themselves joining with us herein. I hope it was a profitable time to some. The 13th we visited Scarborough monthly-meeting, held at Whitby, where, although we found a sincere remnant with whom we had unity in spirit, and they had a satisfactory sense of our close and earnest labours in that meeting; yet many under the same pro­fession were greatly backslidden, and revolted from the primitive power and purity of that undefiled religion, which the faithful amongst us have been, and are led into: divine counsel was eminently manifested, in order to heal their backsliding, and to bring them into a due sense of the weight and great importance of those testimonies to the blessed truth, given to us as a people to [Page 331] bear, which made good impression on some; but others seemed at so great a distance, that it was hard to make them rightly sensible of their true interest. We departed from thence with ease and peace of mind. The 14th, Bridlington monthly-meeting was held, which was very small, and the life of religion very low; but little ability and judgment to manage the affairs of the church appeared; it was therefore our opi­nion, they were too weak to subsist honour­ably as a monthly-meeting, and that it would promote the general good, to join them to some other monthly-meeting. The 17th, Oustwick monthly-meeting was held at Hull. Upon the usual inquiries it appeared, that much lukewarmness and defection had crept in; and for want of a godly zeal in most of the active members, discipline had not been strictly and impar­tially maintained, so that darkness and weak­ness had prevailed. In this mournful state of things, our labours were painful and exercising; yet, through divine assistance, the testimony of truth in its several branch­es was exalted, and judgment set upon those who had violated the same. The few sincere-hearted labourers amongst them were earnestly advised and encouraged to bear the ark of the testimony of the Lord as upon their shoulders, in the people's sight, which I hope had a good effect. The 19th, we visited the monthly-meet­ing [Page 332] of Cave. The appearance of the mem­bers was plain, yet we found great dead­ness and insensibility amongst them, which must be the case, where people are content­ed in an empty form of religion, without the power of it. Much Christian labour was bestowed in order to kindle a living zeal; but, alas! little impression was made on some, yet I hope this visit was of con­siderable service to others, and may tend to general benefit; but all the increase is of the Lord. The 21st we visited York monthly-meeting, wherein appeared much want of a lively sense of truth on the minds of active members, and divers deficiencies and some disorders, had crept in, and re­mained, by a neglect of proper dealing, and an exercise of sound judgment. Here we had cause to see, as well as at many other places, that a literal knowledge of our dis­cipline, without heavenly life influencing the minds of those exercised therein, bring­eth nothing effectually to pass, to God's glory, and the edification of his church and people. Great and deep was our labour, under a weighty sense of the divine power, and also of the low, languid state of the church in this city, desiring she might be favoured to arise and shake herself from the dust of the earth, strengthening the things which remain. This finished our visits to the monthly-meetings in this coun­ty; and though I have not particularly [Page 333] mentioned the opportunities taken by us in select meetings of ministers and elders, yet we had such opportunities in most or all the monthly-meetings; where their queries were read and answered; advice, caution, counsel, and reproof also, were administered as we found ourselves led and influenced thereunto. The 24th of the 6th month, their quarterly-meeting was held in York. We had drawn up the state of their monthly-meetings, being fourteen in num­ber, as the same appeared to us from their answers to the usual queries, and other in­quiries made by us in our late visit to them, with sundry remarks thereon, particularly on the great and mournful slackness in, and neglect of, divine worship; especially on week-days, which discovers an indifference and lukewarmness much to be lamented. Earnest labour was bestowed in that great meeting, to fasten the weight and great im­portance of qualified members, coming more earnestly and feelingly under a deep sense of the care of the churches; that so an increase of zeal and diligence may be exer­cised throughout; in warning the unruly, comforting the feeble-minded, and in sup­porting the weak. It was a solemn time, the members being sensibly affected with the great need of a better regulation in di­vers respects; a large committee was ap­pointed to visit and assist the monthly, also particular meetings, as they saw cause, in [Page 334] order to help forward the necessary work of reformation. The monthly-meetings also, except one, in consequence of our visit appointed committees to visit particular meetings and individuals, as their way might open, for the better putting in prac­tice our Christian discipline. In this city, our friend John Hunt of London, joined us; and here we parted with Jonathan Raine, Matthew Mellor, and William Hird. We went next into Lincolnshire, and on the 29th of the 6th month, visited their monthly-meeting, held at Gainsborough: here John Oxley of Norwich met us. Things appeared very low and defective, as to the discipline and good order of the church in this place; the members, in too general a way, being by indifference and weakness, insensible of its great worth and usefulness. Our spirits were deeply bap­tized into a sense of their states, and we re­ceived ability, with great plainness to lay before them the dangerous consequence of such an unsavoury unfruitful condition, and the great duty which the members of so­ciety owed to God, themselves, and to one another, in a religious capacity, which for the present seemed to affect their minds; may the impression be lasting! We had also some things to offer by way of encourage­ment, to a few sincere, though weak ones amongst them. The 2d of the 7th month, we visited Wainfleet monthly-meeting, find­ing [Page 335] things distressingly low and much out of order; and but few who had the cause of truth at heart, so as to mourn because of the great desolation and waste made in the society there, by earthly-mindedness and other fleshly liberties. Our minds were deeply engaged that truth might break through, and soften the minds of those dry, carnal professors, who, instead of help­ing forward the necessary work of disci­pline, were great clogs and hinderances thereunto, being as dead weights and bur­dens on the more lively part of the body. Through the holy efficacy of that pure life, which graciously attended us from place to place, we were enabled to dis­charge our consciences at that meeting, in much plain-dealing, to our own peace and the comfort and relief of the few up­right-hearted there. The 4th we visited Spalding monthly-meeting; much disorder and slackness appeared also at this meeting, in some; others, who would seem to be something in religion, were but too much like the unfruitful fig-tree, on which, when it came to be nearly examined, nothing was to be found but leaves; having, like Ephraim and Demas, forsaken the dew and tenderness of their youth, and embraced this present world. Such, though they re­tain something of the outward resemblance, cannot prosper in religion, as they are dry and insipid. in this low, mournful state [Page 336] of things, truth arose, and furnished with suitable matter and utterance, in plain deal­ing with formal professors, and proper en­couragement to some hopeful youth and others, to come up in a more lively zeal and concern for God's cause, than had been maintained of late at that meeting, which I hope was of good service. The 6th we visited Lincoln monthly-meeting, held at Broughton. This meeting appeared in a very low condition, as to a lively sense of truth; consequently, the discipline thereof was not rightly managed, as being done too much in the will, wisdom, and temper of man. Some appeared hopeful and tender, especially of a younger rank, to whom, I hope, our deep and earnest labour amongst them was profitable.

The 8th of the 7th month, the quarterly-meeting was held at Lincoln; before which we laid in writing, the languid and disor­derly state of the society in that county, with sundry close remarks thereon, point­ing out, in some measure, the cause of the great declension found amongst them. This was accompained with our joint and earnest endeavours, to bring the weight of those things upon the members, that they might feel a proper engagement of mind to arise, and repair the breaches made, which had a good effect on some minds, and a committee was appointed in order to promote the work of reformation; which was also done [Page 337] at most, or all their monthly-meetings. From Lincoln, John Hunt and Joseph Row returned home to London, and John Oxley to Norwich; Thomas Corbyn, Joseph Taylor, and myself, went into Not­tinghamshire. The 13th of the 7th month we visited Retford monthly-meeting, as it was called, wherein we found a few tender and hopeful, and had some openness to ad­minister counsel and advice, tending to their help and improvement, which appear­ed to be well received, and some minds were affected therewith; yet very little was dis­covered by us of discipline being put in prac­tice, but almost every thing relating there­to was neglected. It therefore was our judgment they ought to be joined to some other monthly-meeting, yet their situation rendered that somewhat difficult; however, we concluded to lay the case before their ensuing quarterly-meeting. The 14th we visited Mansfield monthly-meeting, which also appeared very low and weak; but very little of the business of a monthly-meeting properly done, as the number was very small that generally attended them, and in most of them the essential qualification for service in the church of Christ much want­ing. It was therefore our judgment, that it would be for the general good, that Mans­field monthly-meeting should be joined to that of Chesterfield, except Oxon particular meet­ing; which from its situation might better [Page 338] be joined to Nottingham. The 15th we visit­ed Chesterfield monthly-meeting, wherein divine goodness was livingly manifested, in order to administer proper assistance, by way of advice, counsel, and encouragement, to this small, weak meeting, wherein disci­pline, in divers of its branches, was much neglected; yet there appeared an openness in the members to be instructed and help­ed forward in that weighty work, which, through the strength and efficacy of divine love, was largely extended to them, in which we had satisfaction of mind. The 16th we went to Breach, called a monthly-meeting, but we found it, in that respect, almost desolate. The testimony of truth, so precious to their ancestors in that place, was by them suffered to fall, in most of its branches; but few of those who were active members, appeared clear in its support. Darkness had greatly prevailed over their minds, yet our deep labour, under the in­fluence of heavenly good, had a tendering effect upon some of them. One thing aimed at by us, was, that the members of that meeting might be joined to the monthly-meeting of Nottingham, they being unfit to remain in their present condition, which was consented to by them, a minute made, and some of their members appointed to propose the same to Nottingham meet­ing. The 17th we visited Nottingham monthly-meeting; the number here was [Page 339] pretty large, but the pure virtue of heaven­ly goodness, (without the sensible experi­ence whereof there can be no prosperity in the truth,) seemed to be much depressed and obstructed by earthly-mindedness, cover­ed over with a form of religion in some heads of families, by whom undue liberties were winked at in their offspring: such not having zeal enough to suppress wrong things in their own families, are not like to pro­mote good order and discipline in the church. We found some who united with us in a deep and earnest labour for a better regulation, and much sound admonition, caution, and counsel, were administered, which seemed (at least for the present) to have an awakening effect on some. On the 20th of the 7th month the quarterly-meet­ing was held at Nottingham, and, as we un­derstood, a junction of that, and the quar­terly-meeting of Derbyshire, was agreed on between them, and shortly to be complet­ed. We drew up the state of the monthly-meetings in both the said counties, as the same appeared to us in our late visit, with sundry remarks on the mournful declension found amongst them; pointing out to them, in some measure, what we apprehended to have been the cause thereof, that those con­cerned might both examine themselves and be more watchful, in order to prevent such consequences for the future: which was read in this meeting, and endeavours [Page 340] used verbally also, that the meeting might come under a solid sense of the state of their monthly-meetings, that proper assistance might be extended for a general reforma­tion. But, alas! there were but few amongst them enough devoted, heartily to engage in so good and necessary a work; however, we were enabled to clear ourselves, by leaving the weight of things upon them, and to depart with ease and sweet peace of mind. All praises and humble thanksgiv­ings to our holy head, for his gracious and comfortable support, in our deep exercises and labour from place to place. For, alas! we should soon have fainted under the weight of that painful service, had he been pleased to withdraw, even but for a little time; but we found him a never-failing fountain of all we stood in need of, and when our service for this time was over, we could not say we lacked any thing. The 21st of the 7th month we visited Castle-Dunington monthly-meeting in Leicester­shire, wherein divine favour was largely extended, in which we received strength to labour earnestly, for the reviving of a living concern in the members, that discipline and good order might be better maintained, which, through the indifference of some, and the backward, cowardly disposition of others, was but poorly supported in sun­dry respects; yet this opportunity seemed to have a good effect, by a considerable [Page 341] reach upon many of their minds, and I hope may prove of great advantage to that meet­ing, as the members thereof seemed rather weak than wilful. The 24th we visited Hinkley monthly-meeting, which, as to the support of discipline and gospel order, appeared to us almost desolate. Our earnest labour for their help and recovery had little visible impression on some of their members, the insensibility was so great; though others were awakened to a degree of feeling and tenderness, who, I hope, received some benefit thereby, The best expedient that appeared to us, was their being joined to Leicester monthly-meeting, which was accordingly recommended. The 25th we visited Dalby monthly-meeting; and as it appeared in the same state as that of Hinkley last mentioned, I shall refer to that account, and only say, we advised it should be joined to the monthly-meeting of Castle-Dunington, except a small branch thereof, which lay contiguous to Leicester. The 27th we visited Oakham monthly-meeting, where much slackness and indif­ference appeared, too many of the active members being at ease in a profession, whilst wrong things prevailed, and death instead of life, overshadowed their meetings. The Lord engaged us in a deep and fervent la­bour, to stir them up, that they might arise and shake themselves from the dust and clogging things of the earth, to receive [Page 342] the eye-salve of God's kingdom, whereby they might come to see their own state as individual members, and also the general state of the church. Oh, how ashamed would some then be, of their poverty and nakedness! We found a few amongst them in a humble, teachable frame of mind, with whom we had good satisfaction, hope­ing this opportunity might tend to their help and improvement in the best things. The 28th we visited Leicester monthly-meeting, in which we found some honest labourers for Sion's prosperity, and truth opened our way, as at other places, to look carefully into the state of things, and to apply suitable counsel and advice, as the same immediately opened, for the restoring good order and wholesome discipline, which appeared too much neglected; and I hope that opportunity was of good service to that meeting.

On the 29th of the 7th month the quar­terly-meeting for the county was held at Leicester, before which, we laid in writing the state of their monthly-meetings, as the same appeared to us in our late visit, with such remarks thereon, as seemed to us pro­per and necessary; and were deeply con­cerned, to bring the weighty sense of their great declension upon the spirits of the active members, and the great necessity of a speedy exertion of their Chris­tian endeavours for a regulation, lest a ge­neral [Page 343] desolation should ensue. But, alas! the stupefaction was so great in this as well as other places, that it was hard laborious work; yet not without hope of a revival, as some concerned members were, by the overshadowing of divine power, made wil­ling to give up their names, to contribute their endeavours for carrying on the neces­sary work of reformation, so happily begun in the yearly-meeting. Here ended our visit to monthly and quarterly-meetings for the present; and I have, with deep reve­rence, humbly to acknowledge, that a re­markable evidence of divine approbation attended us throughout; making us of one heart, by the baptism of his unerring spirit, so that scarcely a difference of sentiment from one another appeared during the whole journey. Another thing which appeared to me a token of divine favour attending, was the open reception we met with, notwith­standing the plainness used by us, in very close searching inquiries and remarks upon many disorders. I hope my usual freedom, in laying open the states of the monthly-meetings, will give no just cause of offence to any who wish well to Sion, since no­thing is more likely to strike the minds of succeeding generations with fear and care, than to have the lukewarmness and defec­tion of many▪ who have been so wonder­fully favoured, set in a true light before them, together with such a remarkable ac­count [Page 344] of the Lord's compassion and con­descending kindness, in seeking their re­storation, and offering his mercy to heal all their backslidings. How can any, without being somewhat affected with fear, read the sorrowful degeneracy of some Christian churches, even in the apostles days; like the first-fruits in the gospel vineyard; par­ticularly that of the seven churches in Asia Minor, discovered to the beloved John, in his state of banishment for the word of God and the testimony of Jesus Christ, and by him with great plainness committed to writing, as a call and warning from God to them, and to remain, for the same end, to all succeeding generations? I have no other end in what I have written concern­ing the state of our society; for whose help and preservation I have been freely given up in body, soul, and spirit, as well as in what outward substance the Lord hath bounti­fully favoured me with, to contribute my small endeavours, that her light may go forth as brightness, and her salvation as a lamp that burns.

A summary account of this visit and ser­vice was drawn up by us, and read in the yearly-meeting 1762, as was done the year before, when engaged in a service of the like nature. A like visit was also per­formed by other friends, who had, since the yearly-meeting 1761, engaged therein in different parts, whereby it appeared, all [Page 345] the monthly and quarterly-meetings, in that part of Great-Britain properly called Eng­land, had then been visited; which, as far as appeared, had been performed to general satisfaction. The yearly-meeting then re­commended to the friends appointed in 1760, the care of extending the same brotherly assistance to the meetings of our friends in Wales, Scotland, and Ireland, as their way might open in gospel freedom. Neither did the yearly-meeting omit sending a warm, lively epistle to those already visit­ed, to corroborate, revive, and strengthen the great labour bestowed, that the same might be made effectual. I shall now close this narrative with just adding, that I have found by solid experience, that it was a blessed work, and greatly blessed in the carrying on. May it be so in the fruits arising therefrom, is the sincere desire of my soul!

The 21st of the 8th month, 1762, I set out, in order to visit London and some other parts, and on first-day the 22d, I went to Ratcliff meeting in the morning, where I had close, thorough service; truth and its testimony having considerable dominion; it was an awakening time to careless profes­sors, and of refreshing consolation to Sion's travellers, of whom I believe there was a considerable number there; I had with satisfaction to believe that meeting was on the improving hand. I went in the after­noon [Page 346] to Horslydown; this was a time of deep travail and painful labour, as the life of religion seemed to be greatly depressed, by much indifference of mind in many, and the prevalence of fleshly liberties in others; yet through infinite condescension, at length the power and virtue of truth arose, where­by the testimony thereof was exalted over wrong things. On the second-day follow­ing I attended the morning meeting, and went on fourth-day to their monthly-meet­ing at the Peel, in which, through the ex­tending of heavenly good, I had open, edifying service; friends being favoured with a degree of that holy leaven, which, as it is abode in, preserves the several mem­bers of one heart and one mind. Oh, then the work goes sweetly on, the body edifying itself in love, as well as with one voice giving forth sound judgment against wrong things! On first-day, the 29th, I went in the morning to Westminster, which was a very open good meeting, the testi­mony of truth went forth freely and largely, wisdom being given to divide the word aright, so that the disobedient were warned, and the mourners in Sion com­forted. I went in the afternoon to the Peel meeting, which was large and very la­borious, in a suffering silence throughout; which, in sympathy with the depressed seed of God's kingdom, and for an example to the professors thereof, appeared to be my [Page 347] proper business at that time. I attended the morning meeting on second-day, and went on 3d day to Plaistow week-day meet­ing, in which I had some close service; but things, as to the life of religion, ap­peared to me low there, where the profes­sors of truth neglect a constant labour for daily bread. I spent that afternoon and the next day, chiefly on a visit to our wor­thy friend John Hayward, who appeared green in old age. On fifth-day, the 2d of the 9th month, I went to Tottenham; there being two considerable friends schools, one for boys, and the other for girls. By the free opening of the living fountain, it was a very precious, comfortable meeting, doctrine and counsel being plentifully hand­ed forth, suitably adapted to the childrens weak capacities, as well as to those of riper age: through the divine blessing, it was a time of high favour and humble refresh­ment to the upright in heart. That after­noon I had a very comfortable reviving time with our friend Josiah Forster and family, he being in a very poor state of health, in appearance not likely to conti­nue long in this world; he, with much tenderness, expressed great satisfaction in that opportunity. On sixth-day, the 3d, I went [...] Gracechurch-Street meeting, which was low and laborious; it appeared my proper business to sit in silence. On first-day, the 5th▪ I went to Gracechurch-Street [Page 348] in the morning, where the meeting was ex­ceeding large, and for a time, very trying and painful; yet in the latter part, it pleased the Lord to arise, and his enemies were scattered; then was truth exalted, and its testimony went forth freely, having great dominion. In the afternoon, I went to the Peel meeting, where I had large, open ser­vice, and truth was over all; it being a time of much comfort and relief to the sincere-hearted. Next day I was at the monthly morning-meeting of ministers and elders, so called because the members more gene­rally attend, especially the women. It was a blessed time, wherein I had open good service, shewing the great difference be­tween the ministers of the letter and those of the spirit: that the letter without the spirit, though of the holy scripture itself, kills that which is begotten of God in the hearts of people; but that it is the holy power, efficacy, and demonstration of the eternal spirit, that renders the holy scrip­ture, outward ministry, and all other means ordained of God, for the comfort, help, and preservation of his people, effectual. I had to observe, that the ministers of the letter were most of all concerned for the external appearance of their ministry, viz. that the words and doctrine may be curiously adapted, not to disgust, but rather to please those who have itching ears; on the con­trary, the ministers of the spirit are least [Page 349] of all concerned about the outward appear­ance of their ministry; having no doubt, if they are careful in the spring, ground, and moving cause, which they know should be the constraining power of the holy spirit, that will also be agreeable thereunto; seeing that power is able to render the most low and simple expression, in man's account, exceedingly efficacious. On third-day, the 7th, I set out, accompanied by several friends, in order to have a meeting that afternoon at Charleywood; it was a time of awakening labour, not easily I hope to be forgot. On fourth-day, the 8th, I had a precious, open, serviceable meeting, at Jordan's in the morning; it was a time of general awakening, at least to a present sense of duty: that afternoon I had a painful laborious meeting at Uxbridge, and what made it more afflicting, was, that the gos­pel endeavours used for the help and reco­very of lukewarm professors, seemed to take very little effect upon their minds. On fourth-day, the 8th, I went to Staines meeting, which, in the fore-part, was a time of very heavy, painful, silent labour; in which, as at many other times on the like occasion, I fully expected the cloud and distress would remain, till we separated one from another; yet near the conclusion, through infinite condescension, truth arose and obtained a complete victory over wrong things; their states being spoken to with [Page 350] great plainness; but, alas! things, as to the life of religion, seemed but low amongst most of all ranks there. I went next day to a meeting at Godalmin, which proved a time of much favour, in the sweet and precious enjoyment of the consolating streams of that river, which maketh glad the whole city of God; in the blessed efficacy whereof, the doctrines of truth were largely opened, setting forth the na­ture of faith, hope, and charity; but the greatest of all is charity, as faith will be swallowed up in open vision, and hope in the full enjoyment; but charity never fails nor changes its nature, being the same in time and in eternity. On first-day, the 12th, I was at Alton meet­ing, in Hampshire, where we had a very large and precious baptizing meeting; in the morning, the testimony of truth had great dominion, and the living members were sweetly comforted together. The af­ternoon meeting there was very heavy and laborious, and held in silence. I had a very open satisfactory meeting at Esher, on third-day the 14th, and another at Wandsworth the next day; after which I went to Lon­don, and the next day, being the 16th of the 9th month, I returned home, finding my dear wife and family well: having, through infinite kindness, been much fa­voured in my service this small journey, and found more openness in the city of London than heretofore. It was with great [Page 351] comfort I had to see a growing hidden rem­nant in that city, who will be exalted in Israel in the Lord's time; who hath, and will yet open a way more and more, for his pained travelling children to exalt his name and truth, by removing the stumbling blocks and other impediments which yet remain in their way, and hinders them in some measure, from taking the rule and go­vernment, which is their due and right in the kingdom of Christ; and usurpers shall see, none can sit with Christ upon thrones, but those who faithfully follow him in the re­generation, agreeable to his gracious pro­mise, viz. Mat. xix. 28. and Luke xxii. 30.

To this period of time, being now in the fiftieth year of my age, I have continued an account of divers occurrences of my life, labours, and experience; with sundry ob­servations on the state of the Christian so­ciety of which I am a member; and though done in a way of plain dealing, yet in truth and sincerity, as my mind hath been im­mediately led and opened thereunto. Let none therefore take any undue advantages thereby to reproach the same: no society of Christians, that I have ever had any know­ledge of, hath any advantage of this peo­ple, either in principle or practice. Here I intend to lay aside my pen, not know­ing that time or ability will be given to add any more, which is all in the Lord's hand; to whom I humbly commit this, [Page 352] with my soul and body, for preservation, during the short space of time he may be pleased yet to lengthen my days; beseeching his blessing may attend what is done; with­out which, our endeavours are fruitless, for all the increase is in and by him, who is glorious in holiness, and fearful in praise. To whom be dominion and glory, through all ages and generations. Amen.

From the year 1762, to the 7th month 1765, I have preserved no particular me­morandum of my travels and service that I can at present find, and although I tra­velled no considerable journies, yet, as I always thought it my incumbent duty, from my first acquaintance with God's everlast­ing truth, I diligently attended meetings when at home and well, both first and week days, also the quarterly and yearly-meet­ings, as they fell in course; as well as some adjacent quarterly and other meetings. In the year 1764, I attended the yearly-meet­ings of Colchester, Woodbridge, and Nor­wich, to good satisfaction and comfort, being favoured with free open service there­in, especially the two last. In the same year, having an inclination to visit London and some parts adjacent, as my way might open; and likewise having a manuscript by me, which I had written about two years be­fore, intitled, Some Brief Remarks upon sun­dry important Subjects, &c. divers friends whose judgment I valued, having perused [Page 353] it, expressed their unity therewith, gene­rally apprehending there might be a ser­vice in making the same publick; being thus encouraged, I laid it before the second-day morning meeting of London, as is usual in such cases; I attended the revising of it for the most part: friends agreed it should be printed, which was accordingly done. It was afterwards reprinted here, in Ireland, and in America.

Having had a view, for several years, of visiting friends in the American Colonies, as I waited with earnest desires to be rightly directed in so solemn and weighty an under­taking, both as to the thing itself and the proper time to enter thereupon, I was fa­voured with clear and full satisfaction, in both respects; and had seen, for a consider­able time, that I should embark for that service soon after our yearly-meeting 1765: this I esteemed a particular favour, as I had thereby the better opportunity to order my outward affairs timely, so as I might, with more freedom and ease, leave them so long a time; yet, except to my wife and two or three friends, who were enjoined se­cresy, I kept all to myself, till about the time it became necessary to lay my concern before the monthly-meeting of which I was a member: which I did, and readily obtained their concurrence, and a certificate very fully expressive of their unity; which certificate I carried to our quarterly-meet­ing, [Page 354] laying the same, with my said con­cern, before that meeting; I also obtained their ready concurrence, signified by an in­dorsement on the monthly-meeting certifi­cate; which certificate and indorsement, together with my concern, I laid before the yearly-meeting of ministers and elders in London, and after a time of weighty con­sideration, friends drew up and signed a cer­tificate of their full unity with me, and my intended undertaking. The ready and una­nimous concurrence of my much esteemed friends, was a great strength and comfort to me in my entering upon and throughout this solemn engagement. I was very sen­sible it was of such a nature, that the whole body of friends were deeply interested in the right and proper performance thereof; and therefore found my mind much resigned to the divine will, and to the determina­tion of his people. I returned home from the yearly-meeting, to complete the set­tlement of my outward affairs, having part­ly concluded, with divine permission, to embark in a ship likely to sail in two or three weeks. I went to our quarterly and yearly-meeting at Colchester: where, being taken very ill of a fever, I returned home with my wife in a post-chaise, being unable to ride on horse-back. I was confined to my chamber about ten days; this put an intire stop to all preparations for my intend­ed voyage; which, on account of my illness, [Page 355] I had wholly given over the expectation of, as to the before-mentioned ship; but when I recovered, so as to be able to move a little about, my mind did not seem easy to let that ship go away without me. I there­upon wrote to the merchants or owners, who I knew were desirous I should go in her, to know what time they could allow me to get ready; their answer was, about ten days: the time was short, and I was very weak in body, and had some affairs of consequence to settle which would take some time; however, the will being good, I set about them in earnest, and beyond expectation succeeded therein, recovered strength apace, and got through my affairs in time to satisfaction. I could not help looking upon this a providential success, as it was far beyond human probability: the Lord, in his dealing with us his poor dependant creatures, sometimes brings us very low, baffling all our skill and contri­vance, that he may clearly shew us, that our success in spiritual things, and even in temporals also, is by his providence.

On the 9th day of the 7th month, 1765, I took leave of my dear wife and family, and accompanied by several friends, went to meet the ship at Gravesend, where we were met by about fifteen or sixteen friends from Lon­don; we dined together, and lodged there that night. Next day, being the 10th of the 7th month, I took leave of friends in [Page 356] much tender affection, and went on board the Carolina, James Friend master, bound for Philadelphia. We got under sail about eleven o'clock, but it was near a week be­fore we took our departure from the Land's-End of England. We had, for a few days, a pretty fair wind, and a good set-of from the land; yet on our passage we had a great deal of contrary winds, and often a head sea. About the 9th and 10th of the 8th month, and for some time before, things had but a very discouraging aspect, having got but a little on our way for about twenty days; most of the company seemed to be affected with sadness on that account: at the same time I had a strong persuasion of mind, that the wind would turn in our fa­vour before night, and had almost an in­clination to have told them so, in order to cheer their spirits, but was fearful of pre­suming too much upon the certainty of what had presented to my view, lest I should prove a false prophet, and thereby bring dishonour to the good cause; how­ever, it proved true, and held favourable to us a considerable time, so that we sailed next day seven or eight miles an hour the right way. The 21st of the 8th month we found ourselves upon one of the banks of Newfoundland, having about twenty-eight fathom water. It was some satis­faction to find ourselves so far on our way; I was favoured with very good health, and a [Page 357] good appetite all the time, and, through di­vine favour, generally with a quiet resigned mind, having full satisfaction that I was in my place. The captain was very steady, and well qualified for his station, and very kind to me; the passengers also were gene­rally civil in their behaviour, though they often burdened and wearied my spirit with their trifling, vain, empty discourses, in which I could not join, but was rather a reprover and a weight against them, which I am persuaded they frequently felt, and I am sensible I was a considerable awe upon them; yet I thought it was prudent, as we were confined in one another's company, to uphold a family respect. I often reproved their vanity and corrupt conversation, and was enabled, in a good degree, to bring judgment over them, so that some would own I was right. Alas, I had sorrowfully to observe, by their manner of conversation, how empty, vain, trifling, and even cor­rupt, the conversation of those esteemed the genteel and polite part of mankind, in our day, is become; little or nothing to be found therein, that conveys solid, profita­ble instruction, either in things relating to this life or the next, but in general it tends to deprave and corrupt: yet many thus void of self-denial and government of their tongues, pretend, with great assurance, to lay undeniable claim to the holy and undefiled religion of Jesus Christ; surely, they do [Page 358] not give themselves any time to think seri­ously about the nature of that religion, and must conclude, the name and profession without the spirit and life, is all they are to look for, except adhering to a few ex­terior observations: such gross darkness and stupefaction is much to be lamented, but very hard to be helped when they are so ignorant of their own states.

It was the 10th of the 9th month, early in the morning, that we first saw land, which proved to be Cape Henlopen; about six o'clock we got a pilot on board, who was a native Indian; about nine we entered the Capes of the Delaware, with the tide beginning to make in our favour; about eleven our ship struck the ground three times, but soon got off. We had fine wind and weather, which made it exceeding plea­sant sailing up the bay and river; we got up with that tide, within about six leagues of the city. Next day, about eleven o'clock, we came to an anchor before the city of Philadelphia. I soon landed and went directly to my old quarters, being very kindly received as formerly, by my much esteemed friends Isaac and Sarah Zane. I was about nine weeks on board the ship in all, and about eight from land to land. I attended their week-day meeting on fifth-day, and had some good open service there­in. I went on first-day to the great meet­ing, where perhaps was present, near, if [Page 359] not quite, 1500 friends, or those under our profession; my business among them at that time seemed to be to set them an example of silence. I had, with secret lamentation, to view their remarkable declension from a true spiritual exercise, which appeared to me but too general, looking for words to feed upon; I found that craving was to be disappointed and famished, and therefore was often shut up from public service a­mongst them, especially at the great house, though I had some very clear, open, power­ful times, in the blessed light and life of the everlasting gospel, there also. On sixth-day, the 20th of the 9th month, I crossed the river Delaware, and went to Haddon­field quarterly-meeting, which was very large, and I was largely opened to declare the truth amongst them with good authority. I returned next day to the city, and attended the yearly-meeting of ministers and elders; things seemed but low: this yearly-meet­ing, which was very large, concluded on sixth-day. It was in a good degree favour­ed with divine wisdom and strength, where­in friends were enabled to consider and con­clude some weighty affairs with unanimity and brotherly love. The Lord was graci­ously with me, affording wisdom and strength to be serviceable at this meeting, both in ministry and discipline, wherein I had sweet peace and comfort. I went the first-day following to Springfield-meeting, [Page 360] in Chester county, where I had very open weighty service, and the blessed truth pre­vailed. In the evening I had a comfortable meeting with a sick friend at Derby, who soon after departed this life. I then re­turned to Philadelphia, and attended both their week-day meetings, which were pain­fully laborious in a silent travail. On sixth-day went to their monthly-meeting, and was livingly opened therein, to shew the reason why the church of Christ is com­pared to a human body, consisting of many and various members; I had good service also in the meeting of business. Their num­ber is very large, but many appeared to me weak and unskilful as to the proper qua­lifications of active members in the church, some of them did not appear to be re­deemed from fear, favour, and affection in judgment. I had great comfort in the la­bour of this day. On third-day, the 1st of the 10th month, I had a very large meet­ing at Haddonfield, in West-Jersey; the word was given with clearness and gospel authority, and I had to shew the power and efficacy of true faith, and the weakness and insufficiency of an historical or implicit faith: it was a good time, and the glori­ous truth was exalted. I then went to Chester; the meeting was very large, and I had close, thorough service therein, on the subject of self-denial and taking up the daily cross. On fifth-day, had a very large [Page 361] meeting at Evesham, and had therein weighty service, on the nature of that new-birth, without which no man can see the kingdom of God; most of the auditory seemed much strangers thereto, which made the labour heavier, yet wisdom was mer­cifully given to divide the word to this numerous assembly, about the space of two hours. Next day I had a very thronged meeting at Mount-Holly, in New-Jersey; my labour in the ministry was very close and searching, to good satisfaction. On first-day, the 6th of the 10th month, was at Burlington meeting, and had an open time; also at their monthly-meeting on the second-day following, which was very large; I was livingly opened upon these words, ‘Pray without ceasing, and in every thing give thanks;’ also shewing, that the power of the word of life ought to be the spring of action in the church of Christ. On third-day, accompanied by divers friends, I crossed the river Delaware, and had a meeting at Bristol, in Pennsylvania; it was a small poor meeting, I laboured according to ability received, to stir up the members to a more lively concern, but things ap­peared very low. On fourth-day I had a large meeting at the Falls; it was very la­borious, under a sense of a dry, lifeless state in too many, and the inconsistent con­duct of others; especially in that of exces­sive drinking, which I felt to cause a very [Page 362] ill savour: I was informed after, it had great­ly prevailed upon many in that meeting, and that divers of them who were there that day, had been disowned on that ac­count. Next day I had a large meeting at Wright's-town; I was opened therein, to shew the similarity between the travels of the soul towards spiritual Canaan, and those of the Israelites towards the outward Canaan. It was a close awakening time to dry, formal professors. On sixth-day, I had an exceeding large meeting at Buck­ingham; to this great gathering the ever­lasting gospel was powerfully preached, and the end and design of true ministry set forth; this was a blessed time of divine re­freshment, to the rejoicing of many hearts, and rousing, I hope, of the lukewarm, in a good degree. After this meeting, I felt it in my mind to speak to Thomas Ross, a friend in the ministry of that county, to bear me company to the southern provinces, which he, after due consideration and ob­taining his friends concurrence and certifi­cate, complied with; and not only that journey, but also to New-England, &c. so that I was favoured with the agreeable company of this valuable friend, through most of my American travels, which was to my great comfort. On first-day, the 13th of the 10th month, I was at North-Wales meeting, which was very large, and was favoured with a thorough open time, [Page 363] to the tendering of many hearts. The day following had a large meeting at Plymouth; I was opened upon that passage, ‘Believe not every spirit,’ &c. had close work with li­bertines, such as are commonly called free-thinkers, and was carried over them: truth and its testimony was greatly exalted and triumphed over that spirit, and other wrong things. On third-day, had a large meet­ing at Horsham, and was powerfully open­ed on the words of the prophet Joel, viz. ‘I will pour out my spirit upon all flesh,’ &c. with some close remarks to those who rest satisfied with a mere profes­sion. After meeting, came a seventh-day Baptist to the friend's house where I was; and if I had suffered it, would have led me out into a wide field of argument, for which I had neither time nor inclination; he ad­vanced several points, but I kept him so close to some of them that he was soon foiled, he found my method of arguing so different from his; he being for a multitude of words and a great deal of ramble, and I was for but a few words close to the point, backed with clear scripture proof, so we had quickly done; he seemed willing to drop it, and so was I, for such are so full of notion and so fixed therein, that the clearest reasoning seems thrown away upon them. On fourth-day had a very large meeting at Abington, the place which I belonged to in my youthful days, and where [Page 364] I was first, through infinite mercy, brought to the knowledge of the ever-blessed truth; and where my mouth was first opened above thirty years before, in a public testimony. A dark cloud seemed painfully over the meeting in the fore part, yet at length truth prevailed, and utterance was largely given to declare the doctrine thereof, shewing that the children of Israel feared the Lord all the days of Joshua, and of the elders that out-lived him. It was a very awakening time, and many appeared to be pretty much affected. Next day I had a small meeting at Frankfort, things appeared very low and dark for a time, yet at length, wisdom and utterance were given upon these words, ‘Man being in honour, and abiding not therein, is like the beast that perisheth.’ There seemed a want of a living concern in the general. Next day had a large meet­ing at German-town, this was a dark pain­ful time in the fore part; truth measurably arose, and the word was given, viz. ‘Let God arise, that his enemies may be scattered.’ Went after meeting to Phi­ladelphia, and on 1st day, the 20th of the 10th month, over Schuylkill, to Merion meeting; things appeared exceeding low, as to the life of religion; I was concerned to call them to work while it is day, and it was a close searching time. On second-day I went to the burial of a valuable friend at Derby, the same with whom I had a meet­ing [Page 365] before-mentioned; the meeting was very large, and there was great openness to declare the truth with clearness and divine authority, even to the confounding liber­tines and gainsayers, of whom I fear there is a considerable number in that place: this seemed to me the most favoured time I had had since I landed, and being also at the meeting I formerly belonged to for many years, it was a precious renewal of that sweet unity some of us had enjoyed toge­ther many times formerly in that place. Next day I went to Philadelphia; and the first-day following to Newtown meeting, in Chester county, where I had very search­ing laborious service; things appeared to me mournfully low, as to the life of reli­gion, many being at ease in a profession thereof. I went next day to the month­ly-meeting at Providence, and had some good edifying service to the poor in spirit; things appeared very low and heavy in the meeting for business. On third-day I had a large meeting at Radnor, and laboured to convince them that there is something in religion besides the form and outward pro­fession, but few seemed to me alive there­in. On fourth-day went to Haverford meeting; I was opened upon the words of the apostle, viz. ‘Great is the mystery of godliness; God manifested in the flesh.’ It was a good time, though the professors are but few, and in a poor weak state. I [Page 366] went on fifth-day to the monthly-meeting at Derby, the life of religion seemed very much depressed; I was silent as to ministry, but had some service in the meeting of business, and returned to the city that night. I had been indisposed some days past, and in much pain with a kind of flux; took some medicine on sixth-day, and was soon better. Next day I went to their quarterly-meeting of ministers and elders, where I was living­ly opened on that passage, ‘Him that over­cometh, I will make a pillar in the house of my God,’ &c. Shewing, that the beast and the false prophet must be over­come, before we can stand with safety and approbation in the great work of the mi­nistry. This quarterly-meeting ended on third-day, at the several sittings of which I had good open service, particularly at the Bank meeting on first-day afternoon, shewing that those who are more willing to receive than to make suitable returns, are neither so honest nor grateful as they ought to be; and on third-day, at the great house, being the youths meeting, which was very large, concerning the nature and necessity of Christ's baptism with the Holy Ghost and fire; there was great flowing of love and enlargement of heart to the young people that way. On fourth-day I was at a meeting appointed for the poor negroes, and had open good service amongst them, in the free flowing of universal love, wherein [Page 367] I was enabled to open unto them the way of life and salvation; divers of them ap­peared to be affected and tendered; it was a comfortable time. On fifth-day I was at a marriage in the city, and largely opened upon these words, viz. ‘The blessing of God maketh truly rich,’ &c. Shewing, there is no real happiness in any station of life without it. It was a good time, for truth prevailed.

I set out on sixth-day, the 8th of the 10th month, on my intended journey to­wards Maryland, Virginia, and Carolina; and went that night to my brother-in-law, Micajah Speakman's, at Concord. Next day began their quarterly-meeting: through divine favour, I had thorough service at the three meetings held there: on seventh-day, at the meeting of ministers and elders, I was livingly opened upon these words of Christ, ‘The disciple is not above his master, nor the servant above his Lord;’ also, concerning what was declared of Christ, ‘That in his humiliation, his judg­ment was taken away,’ &c ^*. That it is not to be wondered at, if our judgment in the truth is taken away at times, that we may see who is the giver of it; it was an effectual reaching time. On first-day I was mournfully affected with a distressing sense of the apostacy of many in that meet­ing, [Page 368] from the life and power of religion; I had a very close awakening time, and truth mercifully prevailed. On second-day I was largely opened with good authority, on these and other words, ‘He that cometh after me, must first deny himself,’ &c. Great weakness and want of living concern was felt in that exceeding large meeting, and too much leaning to their own under­standing, yet a faithful remnant is pre­served; I was favoured to be serviceable in the meeting of business. I took Birming­ham and Kennet meetings, in my way to the quarterly-meeting at London-Grove; these were very large, and I had deep search­ing service at them; but, alas! the life and power of religion is mournfully departed from by great numbers in that highly fa­voured land. On seventh-day, the 16th of the 11th month, I went to the quarter­ly-meeting of ministers and elders at Lon­don-Grove; it was a very painful distressing time; great barrenness and carnality appear­ed to have prevailed in too many in those stations, which was cause of sore lamenta­tion: my public service amongst them was in much close plain-dealing, shewing, ‘that to be carnally-minded is death; and that the natural man understandeth not the things of the spirit of God.’ Here my intended companion, Thomas Ross, met me. On first-day the meeting was very large; I had a close searching time, parti­cularly [Page 369] to some who stood in the foremost rank; my spirit was much distressed in viewing the great desolation made by the prevalence of many evils. On second-day I had large thorough service to the various states of the members, and also in the meet­ing of business, which appeared to be well conducted; some skilful members being principally engaged therein. On third-day the meeting was very large, and through divine favour, I was raised in much strength and clearness to divide the word amongst them; shewing, ‘That the children of Israel feared the Lord all the days of Joshua, and of the elders that out-lived Joshua, who had seen the wonders of the Lord.’ I was opened largely upon the degeneracy of our society, and with great weight and dread, I had to signify, that the judgments of the Lord would be poured out upon them, and that what they had yet seen, was but like the beginning of sorrows, that the stroke would fall upon their idols, their worldly enjoyments. It came before me many times, that the fruits of the earth would be smitten, whereby there would be a sore famine in the land, and that judg­ments, much heavier than they had yet known, would fall upon them; it seemed to me various ways, of which the sword would be one. It was an exceeding awful deep-searching time as ever I knew; I hope not easily to be forgotten. Next day I went [Page 370] to Sadsbury monthly-meeting, where I had satisfactory service, both in the ministry and discipline. On sixth-day we had a meeting at Lancaster; divers not under our name came to it; my concern therein was to en­deavour to open to the understanding of the people, what true religion is: we had a pretty satisfactory meeting at Isaac White­lock's in the evening. On seventh-day, we crossed Susquehanna, at Wright's-Ferry, and next day went to Newbury meet­ing; second-day to Warrington; third-day to Huntington; fourth-day to Monallen; at all which places, I had close thorough service; found things, as to the life of religion, very low amongst friends; yet a remnant was preserved sensible from whence good comes. We went from thence into Maryland, and had small meetings at Pipe-Creek, and Bush-Creek; friends were few in number, and seemed low in religious expe­rience. From thence, fording over the great river Patowmack, we entered the province of Virginia, and on third-day, the 3d of the 12th month, we had a very large meeting at Fair-fax: truth opened doctrine and counsel largely, shewing, that two things are essen­tial to the very being of a true Christian, viz. The saving experimental knowledge of God, and the knowledge of ourselves; the last being the natural consequence of the first: it was a highly favoured time, and the living were sweetly comforted. Next day [Page 371] I had a large meeting at Goose-Creek; it was an exceeding dark afflicting time: my mind was deeply impressed with a sense of a corrupt, blasting ministry being amongst them; and the people having itching ears, loved to have it so; this was so strong upon my mind, that I feared for some time I should have been under a necessity of declaring it publicly in the meeting; I was an intire stranger, and did not know by any out­ward information, that they had any who appeared in public. After meeting, I took some of the elderly friends aside, and told them how it had been with me, as above, for I was silent the whole meeting; I was informed afterwards, that there was a for­ward unruly man, who had given sensible friends much trouble in several places, and had been much laboured with by way of ad­vice, to refrain from his public appearance; that he had for some time settled within the compass of that remote meeting, and was encouraged by many of the members, to the great uneasiness of some others. That afternoon I put what was upon my mind in relation thereto, with a few remarks thereon, in writing, and sent it to some friends of that meeting, but never heard what effect it had. In our way to Opeckan, we had a small meeting at a place called the Gap, where gospel doctrine, shewing the way and means of salvation by Jesus Christ, was freely and largely preached. On first-day, [Page 372] the 8th of the 12th month, we went to Hopewell meeting; it was an exceeding dark, afflicting time; great insensibility and lukewarmness appeared in almost a general way; I was led in as close, plain-dealing, and searching a manner, as ever I remem­ber. The third-day following we had a large meeting at Crooked-Run, both friends and many others attended. My mind was exceedingly low the morning of that day, be­ing lately set out on a great journey, and my horse was fallen very lame, and it seemed un­likely that I could be supplied with a suitable one in those back parts: what to do I could not tell; the more I thought about my dis­tressed condition, the more I sunk and was perplexed. In this disconsolate state, I went to the meeting: to see such a number of other societies, and some of them of high rank by their appearance, still added to my distress in this weak state, greatly fearing the blessed truth should be dishonoured through me; yet as I endeavoured to look singly to the Lord, he was graciously pleased to be a present help in the needful time, and appeared to my soul, as it were in an instant, as a clear morning without clouds. An heavenly time I had, upon these words. ‘Trust in the Lord, and lean not to thine own understanding;’ shewing clearly, that the soul's salvation way of God and not by human ability: the oil of glad­ness ran sweetly. Next day, my horse [Page 373] being unexpectedly recovered of his lame­ness, we set out on our long journey to­wards Carolina, and he continued well all the time. I write this for the encourage­ment of some poor travellers into whose hands this may fall. After three days tra­velling, we had two poor small meetings, where the life of religion seemed to be al­most, if not wholly lost, viz. Camp-Creek and Fork-Creek; we had but little satis­faction in our gospel labours, and endea­vours to revive true religion in these poor places. From Fork-Creek, to the first meeting we had in the back settlements of North-Carolina, was about 235 miles. In our way thither, we had four small poor meetings, viz. Jenito, Amelia, and Ban­nister, and a meeting at Kirby's, on the banks of Dan-River: to some of them, many of other societies came, and gospel doctrine was opened largely for their help and information; in which labour there was good satisfaction; but alas! few under our name in those parts, let the true light shine before men, but were most of them as stumbling blocks in the way of serious inquirers: we were enabled to clear our minds to them, and proceeded on our jour­ney. On the 29th of the 12th month, we went to New-Garden meeting, in North-Carolina, which was very large, and mostly of professors with us: a thick, dark cloud over-shadowed the fore-part of that meet­ing, [Page 374] and it was a painful, distressing time; most of them seemed as asleep, (1 Thes. v. 6, 7.) in the night; yet at length, through merciful kindness, truth prevailed in a good degree, and a close awakening time it was, and many seemed to be reached and tendered by the virtue of truth, and I found great ease and liberty of spirit after meeting. On second-day we had a large meeting at Deep-River, mostly of professors with us, but they appeared so generally void of a spiritual con­cern, that there appeared to me no room for truth to arise into dominion. I found it my place to sit the whole time in silence, which, I believe, was no small disappoint­ment. On fourth-day, there being a mar­riage, we went to New-Garden again; wisdom and utterance were given to speak largely and with good demonstration, in a very searching manner to their states. On fifth-day we had a meeting at Centre; it was extremely cold, and, as some observ­ed, the like had not been known there in the memory of man; and being quite an open meeting-house, and very little of any thing to be felt amongst them of religi­ous warmth, it was really a distressing time inwardly and outwardly; yet, through di­vine favour, I was preserved in a good de­gree of resignation. Next day we had a small meeting at Rocky-River. I could find very little of the wrestling seed there­in; we sat the whole meeting silent, yet a [Page 375] friend had something to offer very suitable to their states. On seventh-day we went to their monthly-meeting at Cane-Creek; this was large, but most of the members seemed void of a solid sense and solem­nity; a spirit of self-righteousness and con­tention was painfully felt; the leaven of the Pharisee seemed to prevail, and the few living sensible members were borne down and discouraged: most of the meeting of worship was held in silence; yet towards the conclusion, some very close remarks were delivered to their states, and very plain dealing in the meeting of business. It seems to me, that when affairs of importance come before such a meeting, they are very likely to be perplexed and made worse by ill ma­nagement, which I have reason to believe has been much the case in that meeting. I am persuaded many of those under our name have removed out of Pennsylvania and other places to those parts, in their own wills, having taken counsel of their own depraved hearts, and when they have got thither, have set up for something in the church; but it seemed to me most of them were very unfit for the spiritual build­ing, not having been hewn in the mount. We went to their meeting on first-day, but there was much darkness and death over them; I found it my duty to sit the whole meeting in silence. On second-day we went to the Spring-meeting; I was led therein [Page 376] largely to speak upon the subject of water-baptism, which I wondered much at, as not knowing of any being there who did not profess with us; for as people in gene­ral in those parts, clothe in a mean way, the difference is not great in their dress and appearance. After meeting, I under­stood that the Baptists gained ground much that way, and even had prevailed on some of our society to join with them, and that their teacher was there; and also a woman brought up amongst us, who thought it was her duty to be baptized, but her husband opposed it; and that the Baptist preacher took her and her husband into the meeting-house, when the people were gone, to undo (as it was supposed) that day's work, or to prevent its having effect upon the woman: it was a time of great favour, and the one saving baptism was exalted above all types, signs and shadows. Next day we had a small, poor meeting at the Haw­field's; and on fourth-day we had a meet­ing at Eno, which was the last we had in the upper settlement: this was a labori­ous meeting, by close, plain-dealing with wrong spirits, for which, we understood afterwards, there was a cause. On the 9th of the 1st month, 1766, we set out, hav­ing two guides, for the lower settlements of North Carolina, being about 200 miles, and had but two small meetings in the way, viz. Richsquare, and at one Stephen's; at [Page 377] the first, many of other societies came in; the gospel was freely declared with good au­thority and clearness, to the reaching of di­vers present: at the other place there seemed to be very little, either form or substance; we were quite shut up as to ministry. We got to our friend Thomas Newby's, at Piney­woods, on third-day, the 14th, being pretty much fatigued, we rested a few days there. On seventh-day we went to the funeral of a woman friend, and had a meet­ing; after a time of deep wading, the word was given in counsel and searching doc­trine, to their states, who seemed mostly to be settled in a mere form and profession: after meeting we went to our friend Thomas Nicholson's. The first-day following we were at Little-River meeting, which was large, but very low and dark in the fore-part; the professors we felt were much at ease and in a state of indifferency; yet at length, in great mercy, the blessed power of truth arose, and afforded counsel and doctrine suited to their state. It was a searching time, I hope not easily to be for­gotten. On third-day had a large meeting at Simon's-Creek; through divine favour gos­pel truths were opened there, with clearness and good demonstration, to the affecting of many hearts. Next day had a meeting at Newbegun, which was pretty large and open. On fifth-day we had a very large meeting at Oldneck, near the centre of [Page 378] friends in this settlement, and others came together in abundance. I was shut up the whole time in silence, which I apprehended they had not been much used to. Next day we had a large meeting at Wells, in which I had a close searching time; but, alas! it seemed to me that the professors of truth here-about, are many of them far gone from a lively sense of true religion, and are become harder to reach than people of other societies. On first-day, the 26th of the 1st month, we had a very large meeting at Ringwood's, it being the last we were to have in Carolina; some friends came to it, I believe, from all the other meetings, with many of other societies: at first it was a time of painful travail, but at length the great Master was pleased to give wisdom and strength, in gospel authority to open the state of the society in those parts, and to divide to them severally; also to shew, that in every dispensation of God to man, he was pleased to give to those who are sincerely attentive, clear evidence of his will, and approbation of their obedience; it was a highly favoured time, which, I hope, will not soon be forgotten. Next day we travelled into Virginia, and on third-day had a meeting at Somerton's; the doc­trine of truth was largely opened, and some very close remarks on the state of our so­ciety; many others also being present: the testimony had a considerable reach. Next [Page 379] day we had a large meeting at the Western Branch of Nancemund: those under our profession appeared too generally unac­quainted with the work of religion upon their hearts; many weighty truths were closely delivered, but did not seem to take so much effect upon the minds of many, as could have been desired.

On fifth-day we had a large meeting at Black-Water; the greatest number of Ne­groes were at it that I ever saw at a meet­ing not appointed on purpose for them: this was a highly favoured time; the ever­lasting gospel was preached with clearness and good demonstration, shewing, that the inward and spiritual knowledge of God, is the substance of true religion; and that, according to the prophet, this knowledge was to cover the earth as the waters cover the sea. I had great satisfaction and comfort in the labour of that day. We went from hence to the quarterly-meeting at Black-Creek; the number here was large, but, alas! great deadness, insensibility, and dark­ness were felt to prevail amongst them; close labour, in great plainness, was used, shewing the cause thereof: amongst other things, that which appeared none of the least was their keeping the negroes in perpetual slavery. I was often concerned to use plain­ness in families where I went, in respect to this matter, and am satisfied truth will never prosper amongst them, nor any others, [Page 380] who are in the practice of keeping this race of mankind in bondage. It is too manifest to be denied, that the life of reli­gion is almost lost where slaves are very numerous; and it is impossible it should be otherwise, the practice being as contrary to the spirit of Christianity as light is to darkness. Through divine favour, the testi­mony of truth prevails against it in most of the American colonies, especially in Pennsylvania and the Jerseys. We took meetings from this place at Burleigh, Pe­tersburg, at Curl's, over James's River, Wain-Oak, John Crew's, Black-Creek, and the Swamp; most of which were very la­borious, in a sorrowful sense that the life of religion was too generally departed from; yet in all of them, except Wain-Oak, a degree of wisdom and utterance was given, to labour in the love of the gospel for their help and recovery; which I hope was not altogether in vain. The next meet­ings we went to were Cedar-Creek, and Caroline, being the last we had in Virginia, they were large; not only those under our profession attended, but also many others, as was often the case in these parts. I think it may be truly said, these were memorable meetings: the gospel was preached in the demonstration of the spirit and with power, which appeared to reach and tender many if not most present, and my mind was com­fortably relieved from that painful weight [Page 381] of death and darkness which mostly attend­ed it in these greatly corrupted colonies. On fifth-day, the 13th of the 2d month, we set out for Maryland, crossing Rappaha­nock-River at Port-Royal, and Patowmack, about three miles over, at How's-Ferry. We got to West-River meeting on first-day, the 16th of the 2d month. We found very little if any thing in that meeting, of that simplicity and self-denial so con­spicuous in our ancients; but a conformity to the fashions and corrupt customs of a vain world. The gospel power arose, giv­ing ability to set forth the nature of Chris­tianity, and how far the professors had de­viated therefrom in life and practice. The judgment of truth was set over libertines and unfaithful professors thereof. The next meetings we had, were at Indian-Spring, Sandy-Spring, Elkridge, Patapsco, Gun-Powder, Little-Falls, Bush-River, and Deer-Creek; we were also at Deer-Creek monthly-meeting next day: in all which meetings, ability was mercifully given, to divide the word suitably to the various states, which seemed, in a general way, much out of the order, and from under the government of truth; yet the labour tended to solid satisfaction and peace; I hope it may be remembered by some to ad­vantage.

Thus having visited the western shore of Maryland, we crossed the great river Sus­quehanna, [Page 382] and went to the house of our friend John Churchman, near East Nottingham. On first-day, the 2d of the 3d month, we went to that meeting, which was very large, the professors of truth being numerous here­about; to this great assembly, the gospel of life and salvation was powerfully preach­ed, shewing the force of truth, how it gained the general assent of people, yet few were concerned to know the same in ex­perience or practice. It was a highly fa­voured time, and the meeting seemed to be generally affected. From Nottingham we went to the following meetings, viz. New-Garden, Hockesson, Center, and Ken­net, which were mostly large, abundance flocking to them from adjacent meetings. The travail of spirit in these meetings was very deep and painful; much distressing flat­ness and insensibility were felt; yet, through merciful help, truth prevailed and largely opened doctrine and counsel suitable to their states; shewing, there is not the least grounds to hope for happiness in a future state, unless true religion becomes the prin­cipal concern of the mind; and abundance more, in the free extendings of gospel life and power, to the reaching of many hearts: everlastingly adored, reverenced, and wor­shipped, be infinite condescending love. Amen!

From Kennet I went home with my sister Speakman to Concord, and staid [Page 383] there one night, and next day to Goshen monthly-meeting, which was very large; there was a great body of friends, generally under a plain appearance; but, alas! it pro­ved a painful, gloomy time of silent travail to me, the whole time of worship; and through the meeting of business, though in a good degree regularly and decently con­ducted, the cloud still remained; this I am persuaded was occasioned by the lukewarm careless state of many members; there is great want of that living concern and holy ardour of soul, which the Lord is often pleased to own in our religious meetings. The members engaging in his work, with­out his presence to animate and endow with heavenly wisdom, cannot fail of causing thick darkness, which may be felt by those who are truly alive and have their spiritual senses exercised. After meeting, my valu­able companion, Thomas Ross and I part­ed for the present, he returning home, and I staid Goshen meeting, on first-day, the 9th of the 3d month. It was very large, and in the fore-part low and cloudy; yet at length I was favoured with a degree of faith, which enabled me to stand up, and as I continued in patience, I found an in­crease, with considerable enlargement to speak closely to their several states, from these words, ‘Trust in the Lord with all thy heart, and lean not to thine own un­derstanding.’ But, alas! very many of [Page 384] them seemed to be far gone into the spirit of the world, and at ease in a profession; so that instead of Goshen being a land of light, darkness hath prevailed in a sorrow­ful degree, and many are not sensible of it to lament it. I went from thence to Phi­ladelphia, taking Derby meeting in my way; got thither on sixth-day, the 14th of the 3d month, having been on this journey about four months. I was received with affectionate kindness by my friends in that city, and attended three meetings on the first-day following; at two of which I was silent, as was often my lot there, I believe to disappoint and famish the un­sanctified desires and cravings of many after words. I attended their week-day meet­ings, and had considerable service therein. On seventh-day began their general Spring-meeting, which ended on third-day follow­ing; some of those large meetings were held mostly in silence. I had then, as has often been the case, a deep travail upon my spirit, that the people might be led by the exam­ple of ministers and elders, to find the comfort and advantage of true silent wor­ship, every one coming to sit under their own vine and under their own fig-tree, where none could make them afraid. I had, notwithstanding, at some of them, good, open, public service. I staid in the city till their monthly-meeting was [Page 385] over on sixth-day, where I had some close service, and then went to the yearly-meet­ing at Wilmington, and was at four meet­ings in two days. At three of them, the truths of the gospel were largely and with clearness declared, to much satisfaction and comfort, I returned towards the city, at­tending Derby monthly-meeting in my way, where things appeared mournfully low; some of the active members seeming very unskilful in the management of the discipline: earnest labour was bestowed, but I thought it had very little effect. On sixth-day I went to the children's meeting in the city; I suppose there were about 200 in all, of both sexes. On first-day, the 6th of the 4th month, in company with several friends, I crossed Delaware, at Glou­cester-Point: the wind blowing very hard, it appeared dangerous; yet the boatmen be­ing very careful, through mercy we got well over, and went to Woodbury meet­ing, which was very large, and the gospel power livingly arose, wherein many weighty truths were delivered, shewing the great use of that propensity in man of seeking after happiness, if rightly directed; also, wherein true happiness consists, and how to attain the same. It was a good time, through the gracious extendings of merci­ful regard. I went home with my near friend Isaac Andrews, who bore me com­pany this journey, three or four weeks in [Page 386] the Jerseys; we had meetings that week at Upper Greenwich, Piles-Grove, at the head of Alloway's-Creek, Salem, and Alloway's-Creek; these meetings were mostly large; great lukewarmness and insensibility were painfully felt, many seeming to rest in only professing the religion of their educa­tion; for these I had a deep concern and travail of mind, that they might come to know Christ formed in them. The Lord was graciously pleased, in great kindness and condescension, to furnish with matter and utterance in an awakening manner, in order to make them sensible of the nature and importance of true religion and wor­ship: may it not be in vain! On first-day, the 13th of the 4th month, we went to Greenwich meeting; the glorious gospel-power eminently manifested itself that day, by clearly opening divers weighty points of doctrine, suitable to the various states of that large auditory; among other things, shewing that the true and saving know­ledge of God, whereby we obtain the right knowledge of ourselves, is essential to the very being of a real Christian; and by what means that knowledge is obtained. It was a highly favoured time, for the Lord's heavenly power was over all, and the peo­ple appeared to be generally affected. Next day we had a large meeting among the Presbyterians, at a place called New-Eng­land Town; their minister having conde­scended [Page 387] to give notice the day before from the pulpit, of a meeting for us; he attend­ed it himself, with, I suppose, most of his hearers, who behaved solid and respect­ful. The universal love of God, through Christ, to mankind, was largely set forth, and people directed from outward obser­vations, to the substance, whereby victory might be obtained over sin: it was a fa­voured time, and the people seemed gene­rally well affected and very loving, though divers things were delivered which are usually controverted between us and those people; there was no visible opposition, but all passed off quiet and peaceable. On fourth-day we travelled a day's journey through the Pine-barren wilderness, to Cape-May; we had one meeting there, and two at Great Egg-Harbour. We found the number of professors small, and things, as to the life of religion, low; yet we were enabled to administer suitably to their states for their help and recovery, and had a good degree of satisfaction and peace therein. On third-day, the 22d of the 4th month, we had a large meeting at Lit­tle Egg-Harbour; after a time of trying poverty and deep travail, gospel life and power mercifully arose, in which, doctrine and counsel flowed forth freely to divers states, particularly to a libertine▪ youth. Next day we had a meeting in a new Presbyterian meeting-house, near Barnagatt; [Page 388] it was a large meeting, and held more than an hour in silence, which the people were not accustomed to. At length the word was given with authority and clearness, shewing the necessity and advantage of silence in worship, and distinguishing Chris­tians of the letter from Christians of the spirit, as also ministers of the letter from ministers of the spirit; and that those who are always ready to preach, must either have the spirit at command, or act without it. It was a great and good time; the people appeared to be generally affected, and all passed off quietly, without any opposition. We travelled on by the sea-side, to a place called Good-Luck, where we found a large meeting-house erected though not quite finished, by one Thomas Potter, intended by him, it seems, for all preachers to make use of who would preach freely, except Papists, who would not be admitted even on those terms; we had a meeting in it, but notice not coming timely, nor Thomas Potter being at home himself, it was small and to little satisfaction. We met him that afternoon on his return, he seemed sorry he happened to be out at that time; he sees beyond hireling ministry, and I understand, inclines most to friends of any, but joins to none. On sixth-day we had a poor, low meeting, at Monesquan; I doubt, but very few therein were alive in religion; some gospel-labours were bestowed for their [Page 389] help. We went after meeting to Shrews­bury, intending to be at their quarterly-meeting, which begun on first-day, the 27th of the 4th month. It was exceed­ing large; some solid friends were present, also many loose, libertine people under our name, and of other societies. In that sad mixture, the life of religion was exceed­ingly depressed, and my mind in sympathy with it: I could not wade through to get ease and satisfaction that day, though I la­boured very hard. Next day the meeting was very large, the power of truth in mar­vellous kindness arose, and the gospel was preached with good authority and clearness, to the various states of that great auditory. The meeting of business followed; there seemed but little judgment to maintain good order and discipline: unity appeared not so general as could have been desired. On third-day abundance of people flocked to meeting, perhaps with much expectation; but my way was shut up as to ministry, and but very little from any other; I found peace and satisfaction by abiding in my place. On fifth-day I went to Chester­field monthly-meeting; it was very large, and I had deep and painful wading therein, in my public service, shewing what man is by nature, whatever mode or form of reli­gion he decks and adorns Himself withal; for that which is born of the flesh is but flesh, and cannot see the kingdom of God. [Page 390] I got through at last to a pretty good de­gree of satisfaction, but found much close labour in the meeting of business, and saw great deviation from the right thing, in some high ruling members, who had car­ried an affair through that meeting against the most lively part of the body, which they themselves had sufficient cause to re­pent. On sixth and seventh-days, I had meetings at Upper-Freehold, and New-Springfield, and on first-day, the 4th of the 5th month, had a very large meeting at Mansfield in the morning, and another at Borden-Town in the evening. The people seemed full of expectation from one come so far; but it pleased the great Master, without whose gracious aid the poor ser­vant can do nothing to advantage, to shut me wholly up as to ministry, in both places, to the great disappointment of many; but there was no remedy; I durst not con­trive or form any thing for them: how­ever, I have no doubt, but silence was the most profitable lesson for those meetings. I went next day to Burlington monthly-meeting, it was large and divinely favour­ed; the doctrine of truth flowed forth freely, shewing what it is to be a fellow-citizen with the saints and of the houshold of faith. On third-day I had a laborious meeting at Ancocas, yet had some good, open service towards the latter-end, which seemed to fasten on divers minds. I got to [Page 391] Philadelphia next day, and on fifth-day, the 8th of the 5th month, went to the mar­riage of John Pemberton, and Hannah, the daughter of my worthy friends Isaac and Sarah Zane. It was at the great meeting-house, being large, and there appeared too much desire and expectation after words, which often hurts meetings and blocks up the way of ministers, which seemed the case now for a while; yet at length some, I hope profitable labour was bestowed, from the words of our Lord, ‘Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after righteous­ness.’ On first-day, the 11th of the 5th month, I attended three large meet­ings in the city, in all which, I thought it my duty to set an example of silence. Near the close of the evening meeting, it was a sweet refreshing time; the thirsty soul had to drink of that river that maketh glad the whole city of God; in the enjoyment whereof, there was comfortable solacing rest from the painful labour of that day, and full satisfaction, with thankfulness that I had been preserved in my place. I staid their week-day meeting on third-day, which was large; the power and wisdom of truth opened deep counsel and doctrine, pointing out the different states of professors in that city, that some of the true wrestling seed dare not choose or contrive for themselves, which way to be fed; whether immediately by the great Shepherd's own hand, or instru­mentally [Page 392] by his servants; and that there were many others anxiously choosing to be fed with testimonies and outward declarati­ons, which state ought to be famished; also, that the time would come, when the word of the Lord, by way of ministry, would be very precious, and he would command the clouds to rain no rain upon such; that it was already a time of parching drought, because of idolatry; yet the Lord would open springs to the seed of Jacob, in the midst of the vallies, and in his own time bring them to Rehoboth. It was a great and good time, and the meeting was much affected. I set out next day for New-Eng­land, and had meetings in my way to Long-Island, at Byberry, Middletown, and Stony­brook, where my old companion Thomas Ross, met me: my service was very close and searching at these meetings. Alas! how hath an indolent spirit prevailed on the pro­fessors of truth; a small remnant excepted, who are preserved in most places, to rejoice in the deep painful labours, in great mercy yet continued to the churches. We, in company with several other friends pro­ceeded on our journey, in order to attend Flushing yearly-meeting, on Long-Island for the government of New-York. On fifth-day, the 22d of the 5th month, we attended the monthly and quarterly-meet­ings of ministers and elders at Flushing; in the latter I had comfortable open service, [Page 393] upon the blessing pronounced by our gra­cious Redeemer to the poor in spirit, shew­ing the necessity and usefulness of that state; and also setting forth the essential qualifica­tions of a gospel minister. It was a bles­sed time, and the upright-hearted were sweetly comforted. Next day was held the quarterly-meeting, which was small, and things, as to the life of religion, were felt to be very low; a painful gloominess hav­ing spread itself, through a want of living concern in many of the members, and from some presuming to act in the church, too much in their own will and wisdom; yet the Lord who waits to be gracious, afford­ed doctrine and counsel suitable to their states; shewing, there is one body and one spirit, and that all the members who act profitably, must know a being baptized by that one spirit into the one mystical body. I found great numbness in the meeting of business; my spirit was deeply baptized in­to suffering therein, and constrained to lay their condition before them by very close searching observations, which appeared to take some impression, and my mind was much relieved thereby. On seventh-day morning the yearly-meeting of ministers and elders was held, which was small, and the vital part of religion seemed to be much obstructed; some close remarks were deli­vered, which afforded considerable relief: at eleven came on the first public meeting [Page 394] for worship, the time of which was taken up very unprofitably by an unskilful ap­pearance; after which, the business was entered upon, and was a painful distressing time; the forward, busy, active spirit of man was let loose in a few elderly persons, who had placed themselves at the helm of government there, and who seemed to have got such an ascendancy over the meeting, as to bear down whatever appeared in the right line of tenderness and truth's simpli­city, when they did not see fit to promote it. The attempt was to lay aside the ne­cessary queries to be answered by inferior, to superior meetings; I was favoured with a degree of wisdom and strength to with­stand that spirit, and to shew the necessity of proper queries, in order that the state of the society might be better understood: how else could suitable advice be admi­nistered? But through the cowardice of many present, I was left to engage much alone; yet have cause to believe, that the weapons given both in the meeting and afterwards in private conference, wounded that spirit deeply, and gave honest friends a clearer sight of it than they had before. Things in the succeeding meetings were managed with more harmony and peace, and the meetings for worship were very large; wherein the everlasting gospel was preached with clearness and demonstration: many were deeply affected, and the great [Page 395] Author was humbly worshipped and adored, who is worthy for ever!

We went from Flushing, and had a large meeting at Cow-Neck, in which truth open­ed gospel-doctrine largely, to the tendering of many hearts. Next day we had an exceeding large meeting at Westbury: as there was general notice, abundance of people came from several parts of the island, so that there was near as large a concourse, as at the yearly-meeting; their expectations were much after words, but they had none from me, being shut up in silence the whole time: the monthly-meeting of business was held at the close thereof. We had very large meetings afterwards, on this island at Mati­nicock, Oyster-Bay, Bethphage, and Seque­tague; and notwithstanding the low, lan­guid state of the society, gospel truths were largely delivered, and livingly opened in them. We then travelled towards the east end of the island, on our way to Rhode-Island, and on third-day, the 3d of the 6th month, went on board a vessel about eight o'clock in the morning, taking our horses with us, and landed safe at Gratten, oppo­site to New London in the colony of Con­necticut, about one o'clock the same day. We got that night to our friend Peter Davis's, in Rhode-Island government, about twenty-two miles. We had a meeting next day at Westerley, the governor of the pro­vince was at it and behaved kindly, in­viting [Page 396] us to his house; but it did not suit us to go.

In order to fill up our time before the yearly-meeting, we had meetings at a new meeting-house near James Perry's, South Kingston, Greenwich, Neshantecut, and Providence; and though we found some honest travellers for Sion's prosperity, yet, for the most part, things, as to the life of religion, appeared mournfully low, indif­ferency prevailing in many, and divers undue liberties in others. I was much af­flicted at some of the meetings with the dark principles of deism, and was favoured with ability to lay open the wickedness and gross absurdity of such principles, warning friends and others to shun the conversation of those tinctured therewith, as they would a poisonous serpent. On fifth day, the 12th of the 6th month, the yearly-meeting for New-England began at Portsmouth on Rhode-Island: this meeting was very large as to number; but, alas! it was a dark gloomy time of deep suffering: the glory and diadem of our religious assemblies seems to be sorrowfully removed from these people, and instead of the meeting being covered therewith, it was overspread with darkness. Here I met our friend Thomas Gawthrop, who was upon his third visit to friends in America; we both sat the whole meeting in silence.

[Page 397]The meetings following, both for wor­ship and discipline, were held at Newport, and continued till second day was over. The public meetings were exceeding large, both friends, and abundance of other people attended most of them; it was supposed there were 2000 people. To these great assemblies it pleased the gracious fountain of all good, to open much gospel doctrine in the de­monstration of the spirit and with power, which appeared to be generally well re­ceived, and was to the great comfort and relief of those engaged therein; but the meetings of ministers and elders, and those for discipline, were for the most part very heavy and distressing; great weakness and want of living concern, were painfully felt therein; little of that divine wisdom which alone can build the house, was attended to, and formality prevailed. Ability was gra­ciously afforded to use plainness of speech, endeavouring to make them sensible of the loss they had sustained, by forsaking the fountain of living waters, and hewing to themselves cisterns, broken cisterns, that would hold no water: yet we found a few sincere labourers amongst them, whose hands I hope were in some degree strengthened; but things in general were very low. On third day we had a large satisfactory meeting on Connanicut Island, to which many from Newport went; and next day we had a very large meeting at Newport, which [Page 398] was the last we had there. In this meeting wisdom and utterance were given to declare the truth to their several states, in much plain-dealing, endeavouring to shew them from whence they had fallen, and how vain it was for them to imagine they were God's people in the state most of them were then in: there was also encouragement to the few sincere-hearted. On fifth day we had a very large meeting at Portsmouth, to which came great numbers from Newport. It was a time of great darkness and deep suffering with the oppressed seed: the young people are mostly gone into the air, and undue liberties; and those more advanced (a few excepted) are gone into the earth; having so much to do in government affairs, many of them got into the offices, friendships, and parties, as well as into the profits of this world. Next day we went off the island, and had meetings in our way to Nantucket yearly-meeting, at Tiverton, Little-Compton, and Accoakeset. The two last were very large, especially Accoakeset; the gospel was largely and with good authority declared in them to much satisfaction and comfort, there being considerable openness, many of other persuasions attending. On second day, being their monthly-meeting at Aponiganset, and notice having been given before of our intention of being at it, it was exceeding large, even like a great yearly-meeting; it was supposed there were 2000 [Page 399] people present. In this large assembly the everlasting gospel was preached in the de­monstration of the spirit, and with power; wisdom being mercifully given to divide the word suitably to the various states: the meeting appeared to be generally affected, and the minds of those engaged greatly re­lieved. Early next morning we embarked for Nantucket, in company with about twenty friends, and landed on the said island about five o'clock in the afternoon of the same day. On sixth day the yearly-meeting began, and was very large: a becoming plainness appeared in the general; but, alas! the life of religion was very much departed from by numbers in that once truly amiable place, so much noted for a family of love. I went on the island as a stranger to their present state, though I had been there twice before, a witness of better times: much distressing anguish was felt in this meeting, and for some time I expected the current of life would have been wholly obstructed; but at length, through divine mercy, truth arose with gospel authority, setting forth what a great and wonderful manifestation of evangelical light and truth sprung up in the last century after a dark night of apostasy and error; when the heavenly power being embraced, brought forth the nature and spirit of religion; but endea­vours now are too often used to support the same principles in a formal way, by the [Page 400] strength and wisdom of man; the Lord therefore will not own a people in that state. Many things were delivered upon this sub­ject with great dread, and I felt the Lord's power go forth as a fire amongst the briars and thorns; many were struck with sadness and fear, and the everlasting name was exalted: Thomas Gawthrop was there also, and had good service. The meeting ended on second-day, much gospel labour having been bestowed in the several sittings thereof. Notwithstanding the general state of friends on that island appeared truly deplorable, yet I believe a remnant are and will be preserved fresh and lively in religion. May their number increase!

We left the island on third-day, the 1st of the 7th month, and landed that evening at Seconnesset, on the continent, being about fifty in number. We had a small meeting on fifth-day, at a meeting-house near the place of our landing, and went forward to be at Sandwich quarterly-meet­ing. On sixth-day we went to their monthly-meeting, where was a burial of a friend that died suddenly. There were many Presbyterians present: the gospel power arose with considerable strength and clearness, with the words of the apostle: ‘Give diligence to make your calling and election sure;’ with remarks on the great importance of the work, how neces­sary to be assured of its going forward, and [Page 401] that a certainty thereof may be obtained, by the spirit of God bearing witness with our spirit, according to the apostolic testi­mony. This exhortation contradicts the dark opinion of absolute and unconditional election and reprobation; seeing this pressing advice to make it sure, implies something to be done on man's part, which may be omitted, and he thereby may miss the elec­tion of God's grace; whereas, according to that, the election is made so certain, even from the foundation of the world, by an immutable decree, that all man's endeavours will make no alteration, seeing one cannot possibly be added to the number of the elect, nor one diminished: the great ab­surdity of this doctrine was exposed, shew­ing how it reflected much dishonour on in­finite mercy and goodness; and some of their strongest arguments in favour of that doc­trine were answered.

I was also opened upon infant-baptism, so called, setting forth how unreasonable it is to uphold types, signs, and shadows, un­less we expect another and higher dis­pensation: that types always pointed to the anti-type or substance, and seeing most ac­knowledge the substance is come, how weak to keep up the sign. It was a good time, for truth was exalted and the meeting pretty generally affected; and although these dis­putable points were closely handled, yet there was no opposition, nor the least dis­gust [Page 402] appeared. On seventh-day the quar­terly-meeting was held, in which we had some, I hope profitable service, in a close, searching way; things appeared very low, yet there were some sincere, honest labour­ers. We went after meeting about twenty miles to Plymouth, where it is said the first colony of English landed and settled. The next day, being the first of the week, we went to Pembroke meeting, which was but small of friends, but a pretty many of other societies came in, considering the short notice; the truths of the gospel were largely delivered amongst them, which seemed to be well and kindly received. We set out after meeting, intending to pass through Boston, and as far to the eastward as we proposed to visit friends, leaving no­tice as we went, at the several meetings, to take them in our return. We had very large meetings at Cachechy, and Dover; and although we found but little living concern amongst friends, yet the blessed truth favoured and opened the way for much gospel labour suited to their states, in order to revive ancient zeal and ardour. The wea­ther was extremely hot and the meetings crouded, so that at times it seemed as if I should have been overcome, and faint; but by divine favour, I was mercifully carried through, to a considerable degree of satis­faction and peace. We returned to their quarterly-meeting at Hampton, which be­gan [Page 403] for ministers and elders, on seventh-day, third hour, the 12th of the 7th month: we were sorrowfully affected to find so little of a living concern amongst the leaders of the people: Next day, being the first of the week, we had two large meetings, com­posed of friends and others: a religious la­bour for heavenly bread seemed almost lost, even amongst those advanced in age and pro­fession of the truth; yet in marvellous con­descension, the gospel power and life sprung up and extended to their various states, with great strength and clearness, even as a flame of fire against the wood, hay, and stubble; shewing, what a great and glorious thing Christianity is; how complete victory and dominion may be obtained by it over sin; and the soul of man be endued with sublime virtues: but to view the notion of Christi­anity people in general appear now to be contented with, it would seem as if little real religion remained on the earth. In the afternoon I was led to set forth, that there is one body, one spirit, one Lord, one faith, and one baptism; that by this only people come to be truly initiated, being buried with Christ by his saving baptism into his death, and thereby witnessing with the apostle, the measure of the sufferings of Christ which are yet behind, fulfilled in us; if so be that we suffer with him, that we also may be glorified together: the deep mystery of man's redemption through Christ, was [Page 404] largely opened, it being a time of great fa­vour, and the people were generally affected. Next day forenoon was held their meeting of business; but as the power of truth, the main spring of action in the weighty affairs of the church, appeared to me sorrowfully wanting, little could be done to good pur­pose; some close remarks were made upon the declining state of that meeting, wherein we had very little comfort or satisfaction. In the afternoon we had a very large con­cluding meeting, wherein Christ was freely set forth as the true light, that enlightens every man that cometh into the world; that as the light of the outward sun is neces­sary for transacting the affairs of this life, so the light of the Sun of righteousness is no less necessary to shew us how to perform the great work of our soul's salvation: it was a good time. We then had meetings at Aimsbury, Newbury, Salem, Lynn, and Boston. At Lynn in the afternoon, being first-day, I found it my place to set an ex­ample of silence; at the other meetings I was largely opened in the service of the gospel, to good satisfaction and comfort. From Boston we travelled to Dighton, and dined on the way at Taunton. Our guide being acquainted with a shop-keeper in that town, we were invited to dine with him: after dinner we entered upon much reason­ing about religious principles, and a close dispute ensued. I was, through divine as­sistance, [Page 405] enabled to stand my ground there­in, and to maintain our principles, to the comfort and satisfaction of my own mind, and I believe in a good degree to his; who I unsterstood had been accounted a very zea­lous Presbyterian, and had entertained an unfavourable opinion of our principles: he confessed they never had been cleared up so much to his satisfaction before, and seemed to be a good deal affected; we parted in love and friendship. We then had meetings at Free-town, Long-plain, Rochester, and Akushnet; in these we found things very low and languid, as appeared generally the case in New-England; our society, like others, having too much dwindled into form and profession. The last meeting was very large, but my way was quite shut up as to ministry; had in the others close searching service. On first-day, the 27th of the 7th month, we had a very large meeting at Swanzey, to which came friends from many parts, some even from Newport; the power of the everlasting gospel arose in this large assembly; wisdom and utterance were given to declare the truth very largely, from these words, ‘To know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent, is life eternal.’ The meeting was much affected; the Lord's heart-melting goodness was sweetly enjoyed by a remnant. Next day we had a large meeting at Smithfield; the nature of true religion, from the apos­tle [Page 406] James's definition of it, was copiously treated of in this meeting: it was a favoured time, and the meeting was generally af­fected. On third-day we had a meeting at Wainsoket, great numbers of loose, liber­tine people came, who, I suppose, rarely attended any place of worship; such came rather out of curiosity, expecting some­thing; and indeed those, for the most part, who profess with us there, seem as if they knew little of the nature and importance of religious worship; but it was my duty in this large meeting, to sit in silence. Next day we had a very large meeting at Mendam, to which came many of our pro­fession, and a great number of such as be­ing dissatisfied with the established worship, and an hireling ministry, had separated and held meetings in one another's houses, hav­ing such as thought it their duty to preach freely amongst them: to this meeting the gospel was largely preached, which seemed to have a general reach. After meeting came a predestinarian, and a young man, a preach­er among those separatists before-men­tioned, who are quite averse to that dark opinion: these two, it seems, had been en­gaged in a dispute in the meeting-house when all were gone, upon some points of doctrine delivered that day concerning ori­ginal sin and the opinion before-mention­ed; and as they could not settle the points, at length they agreed to come to my quar­ters, [Page 407] to ask me a few sober questions, by way of further explanation of some things delivered. When they informed me of the reason of their coming, I told them I was very willing to afford them all the satisfac­tion in my power, but was not very fond of disputes, which seldom tended much to edification as they were generally managed. The old man signified he had no intention of entering into any disputes; however, one thing brought on another, till we got very closely engaged: the young man, the preach­er, was on my side, and, I think, had as remarkable a memory in the scriptures as I ever knew, and was favoured with a consi­derable understanding in the mystery of them. The poor old man, though I sup­pose as well furnished as most upon such a bad subject, was entirely vanquished and confounded to that degree, that his spirits appeared to be sunk with sorrow, because he could not support his principles better. The young man and I, with other friends, withdrew into another room, and had a religious conference, particularly upon the nature of gospel-ministry and worship; he appeared to be much enlightened and not far from the kingdom; but I fear he had entered into the ministry too soon. This opportunity afforded my mind a good deal of satisfaction. I found many of those high professors in New-England, in rather an unsettled state▪ fond of flocking to our [Page 408] meetings, and they seemed to hear the doc­trines of truth with satisfaction, and there was great openness amongst them in many places. But what sorrowfully affected my mind was, that there is so little of the life of religion held up as a standard to those, by our society in those parts; yet I believe there will be a gathering to Shiloh, in the New-England colonies. The difference ap­pears very great in their esteem and regard to our friends, to what it was formerly, though perhaps that in part may be owing to many in our society being more like them, than our friends were in early times; yet I believe the case is otherwise with many, and that it arises from their good opinion of most of our principles.

On fifth-day, the 31st of the 7th month, we set out, accompanied by two guides, through the back parts of Connecticut, to­wards the Oblong in the government of New-York, being about 140 miles through a Presbyterian country; they generally carried themselves civilly, and we had some religious conferences to good satisfaction. The wea­ther was very hot, and the roads stony, rough and mountainous, and the entertainment but mean in many places, so that the jour­ney was attended with fatigue to our bodies and horses. We went to New-Milford meeting on first-day, the 3d of the 8th month; I had nothing to offer by way of ministry, yet in still quiet waiting, I was [Page 409] favoured therein with the first clear satis­factory glance of my being at liberty, to­wards the latter end of this year, to return home, which I fully believed, but kept it to myself. After meeting we ascended to the Oblong, and a long ascent it was, of near a mile to the summit of that cal­led Quaker-Hill; the weather being ex­tremely hot, I feared it would have killed my horse, and I was not able to relieve him by walking. On third-day we had a very large meeting at a commodious house built by friends on that hill; they who attend­ed were generally professors of the truth as held by us, and mostly plain and becom­ing in their outward garb; yet, alas! when they came to be viewed in the true light, they appeared dry and formal; many, I fear, having clothed corrupted nature with a form of religion, and in a plain dress fit in their religious meetings like dead images. After a time of deep suffering in spirit with the oppressed seed, the word was given with good authority, and went forth like a flame of fire, against the wood, hay, and stubble, to the rousing, I believe, and awa­kening of many for the present. The con­dition of man in the transgression as set forth by the inspired writers, that he is in a state of enmity to, and separation from God, consequently, he must experience a very great change, before he can be accept­able to his Maker: the way was opened, [Page 410] shewing how this change was to be effected, and that the operation necessary thereunto, makes indelible impressions on the minds of all who are so happy as to experience the same, that none can be true Christians without it; truth had great dominion that day. We had a very large meeting next day at the Nine Partners, and had close service therein. Next day we had a very painful afflicting meeting at Oswego; I was quite a stranger to them, and did not know by any outward information, that they had any one who usually appeared in public among them; yet my mind was strongly impressed with a sense, that the meeting had been much hurt by a wrong ministry, and for that reason chiefly, my mouth was shut up there in that respect: it seemed as if the very person was shewn to me in the meet­ing, though I had never seen him before that I know of; but I found afterwards, it was a true sense, and I told friends in his hearing, how things appeared to me in that meeting, which seemed to strike him, and he struggled a little, but I left it upon him: may the great and gracious helper of his people, have the praise of his own works, saith my soul, now and for evermore! On first-day, the 10th of the 8th month, we were at the Oblong meeting again; my travail the whole meeting was in suffering silence. From hence, in our way to New-York, we had the following meetings, viz. [Page 411] Peach-Pond, North-Castle, the monthly-meeting at the Purchase, Momarineck, and West-Chester; at most of which, the gos­pel power was largely manifested, by open­ing doctrine and counsel, in a close, search­ing manner, to the various states of the people. On first-day, the 17th of the 8th month, we were at two meetings in the city of New-York; in the morning I was silent; in the afternoon, truth opened the way to public service, shewing the beau­tiful order and economy of human life; all seeking for some mansion, possession, or settlement, and agreeable to the laws of pru­dence and justice, endeavouring to increase their store, that they may have something of their own against the time of need: if prudence requires to provide the necessaries for this short and uncertain life, how much more incumbent is it upon us, in regard to the immortal part: and that our eyes should be turned to view the order, har­mony, and beauty of the new creation, and to seek an inheritance in the holy city? It was a blessed time, and many hearts were tendered. I had a good deal of satisfaction among friends in that city, and hope there is a growth in the best things experienced by divers. On second-day we crossed the Bay, and Staten-Island; ferried from thence at Elizabeth-town Point, and went to Rahway. On third and fourth-day we went to the quarterly and monthly-meetings at Woodbridge; was enabled to labour largely [Page 412] in a searching way, with much plainness and gospel authority, for their help and recovery from a weak, languid, uncon­cerned state; yet we found some solid, valu­able friends amongst them. From thence we proceeded on our way to my compani­on's house in Pennsylvania, and had large meetings at Plainfield and Kingwood, wherein the gospel was preached with great openness, to good satisfaction. On seventh-day evening, the 23d of the 8th month, having crossed Delaware at Howell's-Ferry, we got to my companion's house, and at­tended two meetings at Wright's-Town, where he belongs; the next day there was a considerable number of professors, but spiritual idleness was felt sorrowfully to have prevailed over too many, craving to be fed with words; I found it my duty to be silent at both the meetings. Having taken a very great cold after some of the late large and hot meetings, I was much indis­posed, and staid at my companion's till fifth-day, and then went to the quarterly-meet­ing for the county of Bucks, held at the Falls, which was exceeding large: truth greatly favoured that meeting, in opening doctrine and counsel, for the help, reproof, and encouragement of many, beginning with these words, It is especially worthy to be noted, that the inspired writers, both in relating their own experience, and in ad­ministering advice and counsel to others, on a religious account, lay the whole stress [Page 413] of religion upon the inward, saving, and spiritual knowledge of God: it was a great time, and many hearts were tendered. The youth's meeting was held next day at Bris­tol; it was a low, poor time, and I had nothing to offer by way of ministry. On first-day, the 31st of the 8th month, I went to Makefield meeting, it was an exer­cising time; a careless, earthly spirit was felt to be very prevalent; I had some ser­vice there, in a very close, searching man­ner. In the afternoon I had a very large meeting at John Beaumont's, wherein much gospel doctrine flowed to the people, upon the nature of self-denial and bearing the yoke of Christ; many, not of our society, were present and pretty much affected; it was a favoured time. Next day I went to Buckingham monthly-meeting, which was very large, a numerous body of friends living in those parts; I had great openness for public service therein, shewing, that the promises of God in him, are yea and amen for ever; yet we are not entitled to them but upon certain conditions, that is, being in those states to which they are ap­plied. It was a great and good time, truth being exalted. On third-day I had a large meeting at Plumstead, many attending from Buckingham and other places. The word was given with authority and clearness, to declare to this numerous auditory, upon the nature of true religion and worship, shewing, that it principally consisted in an [Page 414] inward exercise of the soul towards God, and especially depended on a spiritual ac­quaintance with him; it was a highly fa­voured time, and many hearts were tender­ed. For some time past I had been indis­posed, being, through the extremity of the heat, much afflicted with a rash, called the prickly heat; and having taken a great cold, my asthmatic disorder was much increased; yet, through merciful help supporting soul and body in the great work to which I was called, I was enabled to proceed on my journey, having a strong desire to visit some meetings in the back parts of Bucks, Phi­ladelphia, and Chester counties, before the approaching yearly-meeting for Pennsylvania and the Jerseys, to be held in Philadelphia towards the latter end of the 9th month: apprehending if I could accomplish that, I should have little to do after, except on the eastern shore of Maryland and in the lower counties upon Delaware. Here my valu­able friend Zebulon Heston, joined me for a companion to the back parts. We tra­velled next day to Richland, and the day following had a large meeting there, mostly consisting of those under our name: great lukewarmness and want of a living con­cern was felt; yet it pleased divine good­ness to favour with ability to labour in the gospel with plainness, in a very awakening manner, which seemed to have some ten­dering effect in the general, at least for the present. We travelled next day to Oley, [Page 415] alias Exeter, and went to their meeting on first-day, the 7th of the 9th month; they appeared to me mostly ignorant of the im­portance of that worship and service which they pretended to meet about, and as if the chief waiting was to hear what the poor servants had to say: they were disappointed in respect to me, finding it my place to sit the whole meeting in silence. We after­wards went to Maiden-Creek, and had a large meeting there the next day. I believe there were some valuable friends, but many ap­peared in a state of indolence as to reli­gion, looking for words; there was a con­siderable space of silence; at length, truth arose and obtained dominion, and the gos­pel was freely preached; shewing the na­ture of the work of man's salvation by Christ, and the great danger of a neglect thereof. On third-day we had a meeting in Reading Court-House, to which many came, not of our society, being mostly Ger­mans, who behaved in a solid, becoming manner; the word of the gospel was given, and ability to declare it with good autho­rity and clearness for a considerable time, to the tendering of many hearts. Next day we crossed Schuylkill, and had meetings at the Forest, Nantmill, Providence, and Pikeland, in all which, ability was given to labour in the gospel, for the stirring up professors to a more lively sense of religion, which indeed was felt to be at a low ebb amongst them, as in many other places; [Page 416] such causes there are of mournful com­plaints, where people go no deeper into reli­gion than what comes by education or out­ward conformity: many in these parts have entered into the outward possessions and profession of their worthy ancestors, at a very easy rate; yet the Lord, in great mercy, is causing his trumpets to found very loud, to awaken such to a sense of their danger. On first-day, the 14th of the 9th month, we went to Uwchlan, which was a very large meeting of itself, and friends came to it from most of the adjacent meetings; the fore part was a time of deep travail and silent labour, in a painful sense that many present were at ease in a bare profession of the truth; at length the word was given with considerable weight and gospel autho­rity, shewing what a powerful efficacious thing Christianity was, when it made its first entrance into the world, and so con­tinued for a considerable time, mightily prevailing by its own force and efficacy, against all opposition and worldly interest, until the world smiled upon its professors: it then spread as to the name, but gradual­ly losing the power and life, many disor­ders, great corruptions, and desolating con­tentions about trifles, got in. Close ap­plication was made to the states of the inhabitants of this highly favoured pro­vince, earnestly pressing the auditory to seek after the substance of religion. The afternoon meeting was solid and comfort­able [Page 417] in silence. On third-day we had a large meeting at East-Caln, in which I had tho­rough service, to good satisfaction; and next day we had a very large meeting at Brad­ford, in the Forks of Brandy-wine; things were felt to be much out of order, and re­ligion to be at a very low ebb amongst them, yet, through infinite condescension, gospel authority was given, with much clearness in doctrine, shewing, that in order to possess a valuable religion, man should be feelingly and experimentally convinced, that in matters of religion, he must wholly resign his will to God, and give him­self up to be guided by a supernatural prin­ciple; until then, he cannot say, with ac­ceptance to his Maker, ‘Thy will be done in earth, as it is done in heaven.’ It was, through divine mercy, a highly-fa­voured baptizing time, and the blessed truth was in dominion over hard, unmortified spirits. I went home from hence with my brother-in-law, Micajah Speakman, to Con­cord, where I rested quietly three days, after long fatigue of travelling and hard labour; yet all was made easy through the efficacy of that heavenly power which mer­cifully attended from place to place, filling my soul, at times, with true contentment and perfect resignation to the Lord's will, either to do or suffer; in which happy state, my peace flowed as a river, On first-day, the 21st of the 9th month, I went to Mid­dle-town meeting, but had no public ser­vice [Page 418] therein. I went on second-day to Philadelphia, attended their week-day meet­ing next day, and on fifth-day I went to Haddonfield, in West-Jersey, to the burial of Thomas Redman, a public friend in good esteem, who formerly told me he was first reached or convinced through my ministry, in the Bank-meeting at Philadel­phia, about thirty years ago: the meeting was very large, consisting both of friends and those of other societies, a priest and his family being there; the truths of the gospel were largely declared, with clearness and good demonstration; the auditory being very solid and attentive, truth had good dominion to the comfort of many. In the afternoon was held their quarterly-meeting of ministers and elders; it was a low time. Next day was held their quarterly-meeting, which was very large; there seemed to be great expectations and looking out after words, as is sorrowfully the case with many in these parts, especially if the poor instru­ment had been favoured before, and it pleased them: this sometimes tends to de­prive them of that which they so anxiously seek after, which I believe was now the case, for I was quite shut up as to public service, but had some good service in the meeting of business. On seventh-day, the 27th of the 9th month, I went to the year­ly-meeting of ministers and elders at Phi­ladelphia, for Pennsylvania and the Jerseys; it was large, I had some service therein, [Page 419] and informed friends that I expected liber­ty to return home that Fall, requesting a few lines by way of certificate, to my friends in England, according to the good order used amongst us; this was the only one I requested on the continent of Ame­rica, yet friends, of their own accord, sent certificates from most or all the parts I visited. A certificate was readily granted, and signed by a great number of ministers and elders, testifying their unity with my gospel labours and conduct while among them. I diligently attended the several sittings of this yearly-meeting, both for worship and discipline, and had some weighty service in them. On first-day, the 5th of the 10th month, I went to Fair-hill meeting, and returned to the evening meeting in the city. On third-day, the 7th of the 10th month, I set out in order to attend the yearly-meeting on the eastern shore of Maryland, being accompanied by Samuel Eastburn; we had meetings in our way at George's-Creek, and the head of Sassafras; truth made way for close, weigh­ty service, to the states of those present. We went, the 11th of the 10th month, to a small poor meeting for ministers and el­ders, at Cecil, in Maryland; and next day being the first of the week, the yearly-meeting began there, to which came many people of divers sorts, most of whom seem­ed loose, and void of a solid, religious con­cern. Death and darkness were felt to reign [Page 420] in the general, yet the gospel power, in great mercy, broke through, and opened suitable doctrine to their states, shewing the general consent of all ages and nations, to that of the immortality of the soul and future rewards and punishments; and al­though the professors of Christianity were favoured with more clear apprehensions thereof, than others, yet numbers of them live as if they had no such belief, or, as if they did not look upon themselves to be ac­countable creatures. The succeeding meet­ings, both for worship and discipline, were, I hope, through divine assistance, profitable to many. The yearly-meeting at Chop-tank began on seventh-day, the 18th of the 10th month, and ended on fourth-day afternoon; many of the meetings were very large, and the truths of the gospel powerfully declared in them, and the ever­lasting unchangeable truth was exalted over all of a contrary nature to itself: this year­ly-meeting afforded great relief and satis­faction to my mind. We set out on fifth-day, in order to attend the yearly-meeting to be held at Little-Creek, in Kent-Coun­ty, on Delaware; the meeting began on first-day, the 26th of 10th month, and held two days; I had very open service therein. After this meeting I found myself at liberty to seek a proper opportunity to return to my native land and outward habitation, and so went from hence directly toward Philadelphia; I attended their monthly and [Page 421] quarterly-meeting there, wherein I had good open service. By inquiring, I found a vessel bound for London, the captain in­tending to sail about the middle of the 11th month. I went on board, accompanied by divers friends; we sat a while in the cabin, in a solemn silence; my mind was deeply engaged to be rightly directed; and finding, as I thought, rather a freedom to go in that ship, I therefore signified to the cap­tain and the owners, that I intended to em­bark in her, which they appeared to be well pleased with. I then went to Chester-County, to take leave of my relations and friends, and to attend the quarterly-meet­ing at Concord; which I did, and had large open service in the several meetings, to great satisfaction and comfort. On third-day I went to a large meeting at Chester; death and darkness seemed to reign the whole time, so that I had no power to move, as to ministry. I got to Philadelphia next morn­ing, the ship being to sail from thence the next day. On sixth-day, about nine o'clock, I took a solemn leave of sundry valuable friends in the city, and set out for Chester to meet the ship; many friends from thence and Derby, accompanying me thither; where, after dinner, in near affection we took leave, never expecting to see each other again. I then embarked on board the ship Phebe, Capt. Mungo Davison; we got under sail about two o'clock next morning, and on first-day, the 16th of the 11th month, [Page 422] about four o'clock in the afternoon, we got to sea.

I find this remark amongst my memo­randums, written, I suppose, after I had been some time at sea, viz. "It is fit to be re­membered, in humble and awful acknow­ledgment, that the Lord has been with me ever since I came on board this ship, in love and mercy unspeakable, causing sweet peace to flow as a river in my soul, so as to make me forget all my former anguish. For the former things are all passed away, so that, through infinite condescending love, I have learned to sing the song of Moses and the song of the Lamb, and even upon the mighty foaming unstable ocean, to speak in myself in psalms, and hymns, and spiritual songs, making melody in my heart to the Lord, who hath been pleased to preserve me through many, oh! very many heights and depths; heights in my service and affections of my friends and others, I hope from being lifted up or exalted above mea­sure, by the revelation I have been favoured with; and through the deep baptisms I have experienced, in sympathy with the preci­ous depressed seed, borne down and pressed by the sins of mankind, as a cart is pressed with sheaves; the Lord enabling me to be re­signedly contented in that state: whether in suffering or rejoicing, silence or words, he mercifully gave me this support by the power of his own spirit, and now is so gracious, as to reward my mind with sweet [Page 423] peace for abiding in that station wherein he alone preserved me. I was, through unspeakable kindness, when I sat down in a meeting, mostly enabled to say, "Thy will be done, whether in making use of me as thy instrument to sound an alarm to the people, or to set them an example of silent waiting upon thee." What shall I say or return to the Lord of everlasting loving-kindness for preservation, by sea and by land, in many perils; I am at a loss for expressions to set forth his bountiful good­ness, and the greatness of his love and mercy to those who trust in him. I there­fore humbly desire with silent reverence, or otherwise as ability is afforded, to mag­nify, worship, and adore him, who is glo­rious in holiness, and fearful in praise, working wonders, who alone is worthy now and evermore! Amen."

We had a strong new ship which had been at sea but one voyage before; she was very tight in the river and bay, but we had not been a week at sea before she sprung a leak to that degree, as to require much labour to clear her of water. This seemed to affect the captain and the passengers pretty much, not knowing but the leak would increase, and we being but poorly manned, the cap­tain having been deceived in some whom he had taken in for good hands, proving of little use, nay, one of them rather a bur­den. In this gloomy time, through mer­ciful help, I found a blessed support to my [Page 424] mind, in humble confidence, that he who is Lord of all (in whose counsel I appre­hended I was there) would conduct me safe to my outward habitation; yet I was sorry for such an addition of work to the sailors, as we were obliged to keep one hand at least at the pump night and day all the passage, which was stormy and rough, and very un­pleasant to the body. The captain and pas­sengers were very civil and obliging to me. It was the 19th of the 12th month, before we found ourselves in soundings on the English coast. After we had sailed a con­siderable way up the Channel, the wind came a-head of us, so that we beat about therein for several days, and were once in great danger of being shipwrecked upon the Island of Alderney. On the 25th of the 12th month, in the evening, we put into the safe port of Dartmouth. I then re­solved to leave the ship, being about 230 miles from home, where I arrived the last day of the year, 1766, having been upon this journey one year and a half, lacking a few days. I understood it was six or seven weeks before the ship arrived at London, after I left her.

As I have already far exceeded in large­ness, what I intended to leave behind me in the way of Journal, so I must forbear adding much more; yet may just hint, that in the year 1768, I went to the quarterly-meetings of York, Kendal, and Lancaster. I had divers other meetings in the North, [Page 425] and, accompanied by my worthy friend Samuel Fothergill, had several meetings in North Wales, in town-halls, where none under our name resided. I passed afterwards through a part of England, into South Wales, and so to Bristol; from thence I returned home; having passed through, in England and Wales, about twenty-five counties, and attended sixty-three meet­ings, and travelled about 1016 miles.

In the 4th month, 1770, I set out, ac­companied by my wife, intending to be at the circular yearly-meeting, to be held this year at Ormskirk, in Lancashire. We were at Manchester meetings on first-day, and attended a very large monthly-meeting on the second-day following, at Warrington. Truth and its testimony was exalted, and had great dominion therein over libertine spi­rits, to the joy of the upright in heart. The yearly-meeting before mentioned be­gan the 17th of the same month, and held three days: there was a very convenient booth erected for the purpose, which, it was thought, would accommodate 2000 people; yet it was not sufficient to contain the numbers who came, so that other meet­ings were held out in the open air at the same time. The people in general behaved with civility and respect; there was con­siderable openness, and the meetings were well conducted. We returned from thence homewards, taking Warrington meeting on first-day: the journey was very satisfactory▪ the whole being about 488 miles.

[Page 426]In the year 1772, I went, in company with my friends Sarah and Deborah Morris of Philadelphia, to the yearly-meeting at Bristol; it was large and divinely favoured. I attended, this year, four other yearly-meet­ings, to very good satisfaction and comfort, viz. London, Colchester, Woodbridge, and Norwich, accompanied by my wife to the last four, as well as by the two friends before-mentioned, who were in this na­tion upon a religious visit.

Being now in the sixtieth year of my age, and having laboured twelve or four­teen years, at times, pretty much under an asthmatic complaint, which has caused riding to be frequently painful to the body, which difficulty age is likely to increase, I expect therefore, travelling of any con­siderable journies will of course cease: and having written so much already, I here intend to lay down my pen, committing myself, and what is done, to the provi­dence and blessing of God, in whose power alone it is to grant patience, resignation, and perseverance, to his poor, helpless ser­vants, and an increase of their gospel la­bours: So be it!