A PITHIE EXPOsition vpon the .51. Psalme intituled, Miserere mei Deus, &c.
Also a godly meditation, vpon the .31. Psalme, intituled, In te Domine speraui. Written by Hierome of Ferrarie: And now newly augmented and amended, by Abraham Fleming.
Imprinted at London, by Thomas Dawson. 1578.
To the Right Worshipfull, and his speciall Patrone, Maister Gabriel Goodman, Deane of Westminster, continuance of health, abundance of wealth, and increase of worship, &c.
AMong all the blessings of God (Right Worshipful) wherwith he hath richely adorned his Churche, none is of such excellencie as the pearle of his Gospell: [Page] which he hath lefte as a pledge of his gratious goodnesse to his faithfull flocke, therein to comfort themselues, during the time of their peregrination in this world, obiect to so many Woolues, and rauenous beastes. And because this Iewell of inestimable value, may be indifferently bestowed vppon his people, and in due measure and proportion parted among them, he hath appointed such Superintendents, and Ouerseers: or rather Pastours and Sheepheardes, (to speake familiarly) as are not [Page] only instructed by diuine influence, howe, where, and when, the treasure of Gods endlesse loue, (which is his holie word) is to be communicated: but also sufficiently fortified with the spirit of power and valiantnesse, to protect his sheepe from the bloudie chappes of Coruorantes, that they be not damnified. Such Pastours we haue had of late, who to the intent they might not seeme defectiue in their office & charge, neither see the throates of Christes tender lambes torne with Tigers tallans, fought in [Page] their profession so faithfully, that the losse of life seemed to them large lucre, and to die vnder the sworde of the aduersarie, singular aduauntage. Can we be ignorant, vnto what pleasant pastures, sweete medowes, fragrant feeldes, comfortable springes, & holesome brookes, they haue brought the flocke of Christ: yea, at such time as they were like to famishe for lacke of stouer, and to perishe for want of water? Some of these Sheepheardes (after the example of Christ, O excellent imitation,) laide downe their [Page] liues for their profession, that their sheepe might in them learne a president of Christian constancie: other, for whom God in his secrete counsell had prouided succour and refuge, in the middest of daunger and destruction satte in safetie: and bonefires burning rounde about them, felt not one sparckle of the flame, Wherein God shewed his omnipotence, and besides that his compassion: his omnipotence in preseruing them, euen at the speares point: and his compassion in remembring his sheepe, of [Page] whose deliuerance from errour he was not vnmindfull, being so carefull for their Sheepherds restitution. Herein shineth the goodnesse of God most gloriously, and it is no small prouocation vnto vs to be thankfull. And although euerie Pastour hath not confirmed his doctrine with the losse of life: yet is it no reason that they are not Apostolicall. For, in a Pastour this is required, that he breake the bread of life to the people purely, that he intermingle not his owne imaginations with the Scriptures, that he teache [Page] the trueth vprightly, and that his conuersation giue a testimonie, amongst men, of his profession: and this take I to be Apostolicall, as I count the contrarie Apostaticall. That Sheepheard, or that sheepe, which feeleth an inward disposition and towardnesse thus to liue, (Christianly I meane, to speake summarily) let him take into his handes the instrumentes which worke such spirituall effectes. Let him open the bookes of religious men, and though he be able to teache, yet let him learne: for the greatest [Page] Clearke may holde it no scorne to be Christes scholer: though Nichodemus thought it a shame. Whatsoeuer maketh for the glorie of God, for the benefite of our brother, for the consolation of the soule, for the suppressing of vice, and for the aduauncing of vertue, blessed is he that imbraceth it, his inheritance is in Heauen. Such a pearle of price comming to my hand (Right Worshipfull) rough & vnwrought, I tooke the paines (though not artificially,) to polishe and trimme, making that smooth, [Page] which was rugged, and restoring that to perfection and soundnesse, which was before lame and maymed. The Booke was yll englished, and worsse printed (the more pitie,) considering the goodnesse of the matter, and the learning of the writer. I haue amended that which was amisse, and scowred away the rust from this excellent peece of metall: whiche glistering with a newe grace, I present vnto your Worship, supposing that worthie your patronage, which by so worthie a Churcheman was penned [Page] and published. Committing your Worshippe to the tuition of the highest, whose right hand ouershadowe you in this life from all perilles temporall, and in the life to come crowne you with blessings eternall: Amen.
To the Christian Reader.
THou hast here (Christian Reader) a comfortable discourse, wherein to exercise thy selfe, at suche time as thou shalt feele in thy selfe a disposition to deuotion. It is but litle, yet notwithstanding pithie: and worthie to be read, marked, & learned: for therin are manifestly set downe, the passions of a penitent sinner, his remorse of conscience, his sorowe for his transgression, his confession of his offence, his inuocation vppon God for remission, his confidence to be comforted, his hope to obteine [Page] mercie: & what good motion soeuer it pleaseth the spirit of God to worke in such, as he vouchsafeth, of his vnspeakable bountie & goodnesse, to stirre vp in the heartes of all Christian Conuerts. And surely, as the benefite of this booke, in consideration of the substance and matter therin comprised, is excellent & singular: so it ought with hotter zeale to be embraced, & as a Iewell of ioy, among precious pearles and costlie treasure, to be reposed. For, whereas they, seruing only the delight of the eye, & the satisfying of the fansie, are esteemed (and not without desert) as [Page] things passing precious: this booke, in somuch as it hath an office of more excellencie, & cōforteth the soule with spirituall consolation, is to be takē (as it is) for a thing much more valuable. Hath the sting of sinne hurt thee? Come hither, and learne a remedie. Hath the horror & haynousnesse of thine offences dismayed thee? Come hither, here is a recept to increase thy courage. Haue wicked men entised thee to wallowe with them in the filthie puddles of vncleane life? Come hither, here thou shalt know at what well to fetch water, that thou maist be cleansed. Hast thou not the power [Page] to withstand the assaultes of the tempter, I meane old Sathan the malicious enimie of mankinde? Come hither, this booke will send thee to the storehouse of the scripture, where thou shalt finde furniture to fortifie & make thee strōg. Finally, art thou infected with any carnall venome? Hast thee hither, here thou shalt soone learne what Apothecarie hath the best & most souereigne Mithridatū, euē Christ Iesus our Sauiour. Wherfore, neglect not the vse of this booke: for as the benefite thereof is singular: so dutie requireth that it be accordingly regarded. Farewell. Thine to vse:
¶ An Exposition, after the maner of a contemplation, vpon the Psalm. 51. called Miserere mei Deus: which Hierome of Ferrarie made, at the latter ende of his dayes.
ALas wretche that I am, comfortlesse, and forsaken of all men, which haue offended both heauen and earth. Whither shall I go? Or whither shall I turne me? To whom shall I flee for [Page] succour? Who shall haue pitie or compassion on me? Vnto heauen dare I not lift vp myne eyes, for I haue greeuously sinned against it: and in earth can I finde no place of defence, for I haue bene noysome vnto it. What shall I now doe? Shall I despaire? God forbid, full mercifull is God, and my Sauiour is meeke and louing, therfore God only is my refuge, he will not despise his creature, neither forsake his owne image. Vnto thee therfore most meeke and mercifull God come I, all sad and sorowfull: for thou only art my hope, and thou art [Page] only the doore of my defence. But what shall I say vnto thee, seeing I dare not lift vp mine eyes? I will powre out the wordes of sorowe, I will heartily beseech thee for mercie, and will say:
Miserere mei Deus. Psalme. 51.
1 HAue mercy vpon me. O God, according to thy louing kindnesse, according to the multitude of thy compassions put away mine iniquities.
2 Wash me throughly from mine iniquities, & cleanse me from my sinne.
[Page]3 For I knowe mine iniquities, and my sinne is euer before me.
4 Against thee, against thee onely haue I sinned, and done euill in thy sight, that thou maist be iust whē thou speakest and pure when thou iudgest.
5 Beholde, I was borne in iniquitie, and in sinne hathe my mother conceiued me.
6 Behold, thou louest trueth in the inward affections; therefore hast thou taught me wisedome in the secret of mine heart.
7 Purge me with Hyssope, & [Page] I shalbe cleane: wash me, & I shalbe whiter then snowe.
8 Make me to heare ioy and gladnes, that the bones which thou hast broken, may reioyce.
9 Hide thy face from my sinnes, and put away all mine iniquities.
10 Create in me a cleane heart O God, & renewe a right spirit within me.
11 Cast me not away from thy presence, & take not thine holy spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the ioy of thy saluation, and establish me with thy free spirit.
[Page]13 Then shal I teach thy ways vnto the wicked, and sinners shall be conuerted vnto thee.
14 Deliuer me from bloud, O God, which art the God of my saluation, and my tongue shall sing ioyfully of thy righteousnesse.
15 Open thou my lippes, O Lord, and my mouth shall shew forth thy praise.
16 For thou desirest no sacrifice, though I would geue it: thou delitest not in burnt offering.
17 The sacrifices of God are a contrite spirite: a contrite and [Page] a broken heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.
18 Be fauourable vnto Sion for thy good pleasure: builde the walles of Hierusalem.
19 Then shalt thou accept the sacrifices of righteousnes, euen the burnt offering & oblation, then shal they offer calues vpon thine altar.
The Exposition.
1 HAue mercie vpon me, O God, according to thy louing kindnes: according to the multitude of thy compassions put away mine iniquities.
God which dwellest in light that no man can attaine, God which art hid & canst not be seene with bodily eyes, nor comprehended with any vnderstanding that euer was made, neither expressed with the tongues of mē or Angels. My God, the which art incomprehēsible doe I seeke, the which canst not be expressed doe I call vpon, what thing so euer thou art which art in euerie place, I knowe that thou art the most high and excellent thing, if thou be a thing, & not rather the cause of all thinges, if I may so call thee: for I find no name, by the which I may name [Page] and expresse thine vnspeakable maiestie. God (I say) which art all thinges that are in thee, for thou arte euen thine owne wisedome, thy power, and thy most glorious felicitie. Seeing therefore that thou art mercifull: what arte thou but euen verie mercie it selfe? And what am I but verie miserie? Beholde therefore (O God) which arte mercie, beholde miserie is before thee. What shalt thou do mercie? Truly thy work? Canst thou do otherwise than thy nature is? And what is thy work? Verily to take away miserie, and to lift vp them that are in wretched [Page] condition. Therefore haue mercie on me (O God:) God (I saye) which arte mercie, take away my miserie, take away my sinnes, for they are mine extreme miserie. Lift me vp which am so miserable, shewe thy worke in me, and exercise thy power vpon me. One depth requireth another: the depth of miserie requireth the depth of mercie, the depth of sinne asketh the depth of grace and of fauour: greater is the depth of mercie, than the depth of miserie: let therfore the one depth swallowe vp the other: let the bottomlesse depth of mercie, swallowe vp [Page] the profounde depth of miserie.
Haue mercie on me (O God) according to thy great mercie. Not after the mercy of men, whiche is but small: but after thine owne mercie, which is greate, which is vnmeasurable, which is incomprehensible, which passeth all sinnes without comparison. According to that thy great mercie, with the which thou hast so loued the world, that thou wouldest giue thine only sonne. What mercie can be greater? What loue can be more? Who can despaire? Who shoulde not haue good confidence? God was made [Page] man, and crucified for men. Therfore haue mercie on me, O God, accordinge to this thy greate mercy, by the which thou hast geuen thy sonne for vs, by the which through him thou hast taken away the sinnes of the world, by the whiche, (through his crosse) thou hast lightened all men, by the which through him thou haste redressed all thinges in heauen and earth. Washe me (O Lord) in his bloude, lighten me in his humilitie, redresse me in his resurrection. Haue mercie on me (O God) not after thy small mercie, for that is but thy small [Page] mercie, (in comparison) when thou helpest men of their bodilie euilles: but it is great when thou forgeuest sinners, and dost raise men alofte by thy fauoure aboue the toppe of the earth. Euen so (Lorde) haue mercie on me, according to this thy greate mercie that thou turne me vnto thee, that thou put out my sinnes, and that thou iustifie me by thy grace and fauoure. And according to the multitude of thy compassions: wipe away mine iniquities. Thy mercie Lorde is the aboundaunce of thy pitie, by the which thou lookest gently on the poore [Page] and wretched. Thy compassions are the workes and proceedings of thy mercie. Marie Magdalen came vnto thy feete (good Iesu:) she washed them with her teares, and wiped them with her haire, thou forgauest her, and diddest send her away in peace. This was (Lord) one of thy compassions. Peter denied thee, and forsooke thee with an othe, thou lookedst vpon him, and he wept bitterly, thou forgauest him, and madest him one of the cheefe among thine Apostles. This was (Lorde) another of thy compassions. The theefe on the crosse [Page] was saued with one word. Paule in the furious woodnesse of persecution was called: and by and by fulfilled with the holy Ghost. These are Lord thy cōpassions. The time should faile me, if I should number all thy mercifull compassions. For looke how many righteous men there be, so manie are thy godly compassions. There is none that can glorie in himselfe. Let them all come that are righteous, either in earth, or in heauen, and let vs ask them before thee, Whether they be saued by their owne power and vertue? And surely, they all will answere [Page] with one heart, and one mouth, saying: Not vnto vs (Lorde) not vnto vs, but vnto thy name giue all the praise, for thy mercie and for thy trueths sake. For they in their own sword possessed not the land, & their owne arme or power saued thē not: but thy right hand, and thine arme, and the lightning of thy countenaunce: For thou delightest in them, that is, They are not saued for their owne deseruings, lest any man should boast himselfe: but because it pleased thee so to be. Which thing the Prophet doth also more expressely [Page] witnesse of thee, when he saith: He saued me, because he would haue me. Sith therefore thou art the one God, with whom is no alteration, or variablenesse, neither art thou changed vnto darknesse, and we thy creaturs, as well as our fathers, which were borne vnder concupiscence, sinners as well as we. And sith there is but one mediatour and attonement betweene God and man, that is, Christ Iesus, which endureth for euer: why doest thou not powre out thy plentious compassions vpon vs, as well as thou diddest vpon our fathers? Haste thou forgotten [Page] vs? Or are we onely sinners? Did not Christ die for vs? Are all thy merits spente, and none left? Lorde our God, I desire and heartily beseeche thee, to put out mine iniquitie, according vnto the multitude of thy compassions: For many, yea and infinite are thy compassions, that according (I saye) to the multitude of thy compassions, thou vouchsafe to quench my sinnes, that as thou hast drawne and receiued innumerable sinners, and haste made them righteous: euen so that thou wilt draw and take me, and make me righteous, through [Page] thy grace and fauour. Therefore, according to the multitude of thy compassions wipe awaye mine iniquitie. Cleanse and purifie my heart, that after all mine iniquitie is put out, and all my vncleannes cleansed, it may be as a cleane table, in which the finger of God may write the lawe of his loue and charitie, with the which can none iniquitie continue.
2 Yet washe me more from mine iniquitie, and cleanse me from my sinne.
I graunt and acknowledge (O Lord,) thou hast once put out mine iniquitie, thou hast put it [Page] out againe, and hast washed me a thousande times: Howbeit, yet washe me from mine iniquitie: for I am fallen againe. Doest thou vse to spare a sinfull man, vntill a certeine number of his sinnes? Which when Peter inquired, How ofte shall my brother offend against me, & I shall forgeue him: whether seuen times? Thou answeredst, I say not seuen times, but seuētie times seuen times? Taking the certein number for an infinite number. Sith then that a man must forgiue often, shalt thou in pardoning and forgeuing be passed [Page] of man? Is not God more then man. Yea, rather God is the great Lord, and euerie man liuing is nothing but vanitie. And only God is good, and euery man a lier. Hast thou not said? In what houre soeuer the sinner doeth repent, I will not remēber any of his iniquities. Behold, I a sinner do repent and mourne for mine old priuie sores festred within, and now are they broken forth for mine own folishnes. I am sore brused & broken, I walke in continual moourning, I am feeble and verie weake, I rored for the sorow of my hart. Lord [Page] all my desires are before thee, and my sorowfull sighes are not vnknowne vnto thee. Mine heart trembleth and panteth for sorowe, my strength faileth me, and euen the verie sight of mine eyes cease from their office. Wherfore then (O Lorde) doest thou not put away mine iniquitie? And if thou put it out, according to the multitude of thy mercies, yet washe me from mine iniquitie. For yet am I not perfectly purified. Finishe thy worke, take away the whole offence, and also the paine that is due vnto the crime, increase thy light within me. Kindle [Page] my heart with thy loue and charitie, put out all feare, for perfect loue sendeth away feare. Let the loue of the worlde, the loue of the fleshe, the loue of vaine glorie, and the loue of my selfe vtterly departe from me. Yet still more and more washe me from mine iniquitie, by the which I haue offended against my neighboure, & cleanse me from my sinne, that I haue committed against thee. I would haue thee put away, not onely the fault, and paine that foloweth it, but also the occasion and nourishement of sinne. Wash me (I say) with the water of thy [Page] gratious fauour, of which water he that drinketh, shall not thirste for euer, but it shall be made in him a fountaine of liuing water, running into euerlasting life. Washe me with the comfortable waters of thy holy Scriptures, that I may be nūbred among thē, vnto whō thou saiedst, Nowe are ye cleane, for my wordes which I haue spoken vnto you.
3 For I knowledge mine iniquities, and my sinne is euer before mine eyes.
Although, through the beholding of thy mercy & compassiōs, I may be bold to flee vnto thee (O [Page] Lorde,) yet will I not come as the Pharisie which prayed not, but rather praised him selfe, and despised his neighbour: but I come vnto thee, as the Publicane, which durst not lift vp his eyes vnto heauen. For I also do acknowledge mine iniquitie, and whiles I ponder my sinnes, I dare not lift vp mine eyes, but humbling my selfe with the Publicane, I said: God be mercifull vnto me a sinner. My soule wauereth betweene hope and feare, and sometime for the feare of my sinnes, which I feare and knowledge to be in me, I am redie to [Page] despaire, sometime through the hope of thy mercie I am lifted vp and comforted. Neuerthelesse, because thy mercy is greter than my miserie, I will euer (Lorde) trust in thee, and will sing out thy plentious compassions for euer. For I knowe that thou desirest not the death of a sinner, but rather that he were conuerted, & that he would acknowledge his iniquitie, and forsake his sinne, and come to thee, that he may liue. My God, graunt me that I may liue in thee, for I acknowledge my wickednesse, I knowe what a greeuous burthen [Page] it is, how heauie & daungerous? I am not ignorant of it, I hide it not, but set it euen before mine eyes, that I may wash it with my teares, and knowledge vnto thee (Lord) mine vnrighteousnes against my selfe. And also my sinne, which I haue proudly done against thee, is euer against me: & therefore it is against me, because I haue sinned against thee: it is truely against me, for it is euen against my soule, and accuseth me euer before thee my Iudge, and condenmeth me euer, and in euerie place, and it is so against me, that it is euer before my face, [Page] and standeth against me, that my praier may not perce through vnto thee, that it might take thy mercie from me, and hinder thy mercie, that it cannot come at me. Therefore doe I tremble, and therefore doe I meurne, beseeching thy mercie. Therefore (O Lorde) as thou hast geuen this grace to me, to knowe my wickednes, and to bewaile my sinne, euen so accomplish this thy beneuolence, geuing me perfect faith, & drawing me to thy sonne, which hath made a ful satisfaction for all my sinnes. Geue me (Lorde) this precious gift: For euerie good [Page] gift, and euerie perfect gifte is from aboue, comming from the father of light.
4 Against thee onely haue I sinned, and haue done that which is euill in thy sight, that thou maist be iustified in thy wordes, and haue the victorie when thou hast iudged.
I haue ouermuch sinned vnto thee alone, for thou commaundest me that I shoulde loue thee for thy selfe, and should loue all creatures for thy sake: but I haue loued a creature more than thee, louing it euen for it selfe. What is sinne, but to loue a creature for [Page] it selfe? And what is that, but to doe against thee? Surely, he that loueth a creature for it selfe, maketh that creature his God. And therefore haue I sinned against thee only, for I haue made a creature my God. So haue I cast thee away, and haue bene iniurious onely to thee: for I haue not offended against any creature, in that I haue put my trust or confidence in it. For it was not commaunded me, that I should loue any creature for it selfe. If thou haddest commaunded me, that I shoulde haue loued an Angel onely for it selfe, and I had loued [Page] money for it selfe, then no doubt I had offended against the Angel. But sith that thou only art to be loued for thy selfe, (that is to say, without any respect of good and euil,) & euerie creature is to be loued in thee, for thy sake: Therefore haue I surely offended onely against thee, for I haue loued a creature for it selfe.
But yet haue I worsse done, for I haue sinned euē in thy sight, I was nothing ashamed to sinne before thy face. O mercifull God, how many sinnes haue I done in thy sighte, which I would in no wise haue done before mortall [Page] men, yea that I woulde not in any case that men shoulde knowe? I feared mē more then thee, for I was blinde, and loued blindnesse, and so did I neuer see nor once consider thee. I had onely fleshlie eyes, therefore did I onely feare and looke on men which are flesh. But thou lookest on all my sinnes, and numberest them, therfore I can neither hide them frō thee, neither turne my backe, and flee from thy face. Whither shall I goe from thy spirit? And whither shall I flee from thy face? What shall I then do? Whither shall I turne me? Whom shall I [Page] finde to be my defender? Whom I pray thee, but thee my God? Who is so good, who is so gentle, who is so mercifull? For thou passest without comparison, all creatures in gentlenes. It is one of thy cheefest properties, to forgiue, and to be mercifull: for through mercie and forgiuenesse, thou declarest thy almightines. I graunt (Lorde) that I haue offended onely against thee, and haue done that which is euill in thy sight. Haue mercie therefore on me, and expresse thy puissance in me, that thou maist be iustified in thy words: for thou hast said, [Page] that Thou cammest not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentaunce. Iustifie me (Lorde) according to thy woordes: call me, receiue me, & geue me grace to doe true workes of repentance. For this cause wast thou crucified, dead, and buried. Thou sayedst also, Iohn. 3. When I am lifted vp from the earth, I will drawe all vnto my selfe. Verifie thy wordes, drawe me after thee, let vs runne together in the sweetnesse of thyne oyntmentes. Besides that thou saiedst. Matthaewe 11. Come vnto me all ye that laboure, and are laden, and I [Page] will ease you. Loe I come vnto thee laden with sinnes, labouring day and night in the sorowe of mine hearte, refreshe and ease me (Lorde) that thou maist be iustified & proued true in thy wordes, and maist ouercome when thou arte iudged: for there are manie that say: He shall haue no succour of his God, God hath forsaken him. Ouercome (Lorde) these persons, when thou arte thus iudged of them, and forsake me not at anie time. Geue me thy mercie, and wholsome succour, and then are they vanquished.
They say that thou wilt haue [Page] no mercie on me, and that thou wilt cast me cleane out of thy fauoure, and no more receiue me. Thus arte thou iudged of men, and thus do men speake of thee, & these are their determinations: but thou which art meeke & mercifull, haue mercie on me, & ouercome their iudgements. Shewe thy mercie on me, & let thy godly pitie be praised in me. Make me taste of thy mercie, that thou maist be iustified in thy wordes, and haue the victorie when men do iudge thee to be fierce and inflexible. Ouercome their iudgement with meekenesse and beneuolence, [Page] so that men may learne to haue compassion on sinners, and that malefactours may be inflamed vnto repentance, seeing in me thy pitie and thy mercie.
5 Lo I was begotten in wickednesse: and my mother conceiued me polluted with sinne.
Beholde not (Lorde) the greeuousnesse of my sinnes: consider not the multitude, but looke mercifully on me, which am thy creature. Remember that I am dust, and that all fleshe is as withered hay: For loe, I am fashioned in wickednesse, & in sinne hath my mother conceiued [Page] me. My naturall mother (I say) hath conceiued me of concupiscence, in her am I polluted with original sinne. What is originall sinne, but the lacke of originall iustice, and of the righte and pure innocencie which man had at his creation? Therefore, a man conceiued and borne in such sorte, is all crooked and out of frame.
The fleshe coueteth against the spirit. Reason is slender, and the will is weake: man is fraile and like vanitie, his senses deceiue him, his imaginations doe faile him, his ignoraunce leadeth him out of the right way, and he [Page] hath infinite impediments, which plucke him from goodnesse, and driue him into euill.
Therefore, originall sinne is the roote of all sinnes, and the nourse of all wickednesse: for albeit, that in euerie man, of his owne nature, it is but onely sinne, yet in power it is all sinnes. Thou seest therefore (Lorde) what I am, and whence I am: for in originall sinne (which containeth all sinnes and iniquities in it) I am fashioned, and in it hath my mother conceiued me. Seing then I am whole in sinnes, and enuironed with snares on euerie [Page] side, how shall I escape? For what I would, that doe I not, but the euill that I would not, that doe I. For I finde another lawe in my members, rebelling against the lawe of my minde, and subduing me vnto the lawe of sinne and death. Therefore the more fraile and entangled thy godly beneuolence seeth me, so much the more let it lift vp and comforte me. Who woulde not pitie one that is sicke? Who woulde not haue compassion on him that is diseased? Come, come (sweet Samaritane,) and take vp the wounded and halfe dead, cure [Page] my woundes, powre in wine and oyle, set me vpon thy beast, bring me into the hoastrie, commit me vnto the hoast, take thou twopence, and saye vnto him, Whatsoeuer thou spendest aboue this, when I come againe, I will recompense thee.
6 Loe thou hast loued truth, the vnknowne and secreate thinges of thy wisedome, hast thou vttered vnto me.
Come (most sweete Samaritane,) for beholde thou hast loued truth, the truth I say of thy promises, which thou hast made vnto mankinde, them hast thou truly [Page] loued: for thou hast made and kept them, so that thy loue is nothing else, but euen to doe good, for in thy selfe thou art inuariable and immutable. Thou vsest not nowe to loue, and anon not to loue (as men do) neither doth thy loue so come and goe: but thou arte such a louer, as doeth neuer chaunge: for thy loue is very God. Thy loue therefore, wherewith thou louest a creature, it is to do it good, and whom thou most louest, to them art thou most beneficiall. Therefore, what meaneth this, that thou louest truth, but that of thy gratious mercie [Page] thou makest vs promises, and fulfillest them, for thy trueths sake? Thou diddest promise vnto Abraham a sonne, when he was aged: thou fulfilledst thy promise in old barren Sara, because thou louest trueth. Thou promisedst vnto the children of Israel a lande that flowed with milk and honie, and at the last diddest geue it them, for thy trueths sake. Thou madest a promise to Dauid, saying: I shall set vpon thy seate royall, one of the fruite of thy bodie. And it came euen to passe, because thou wouldest be found true. There are other innumerable [Page] promises, in the which thou hast euer bene faithfull, because thou louest truth. Thou hast promised to sinners, which will come vnto thee, forgiuenes and fauour, and thou hast neuer defrauded any man, for thou hast loued truth. That vnthriftie sonne, Luke. 15. that tooke his iourney into a farre countrie, & wasted all his goods with riottous liuing, when hee came to him selfe, he returned vnto thee, saying: Father, I haue sinned against heauē, & before thee, now am not I worthie to be called thy sonne, make me as one of thy hired seruauntes.
When he was yet a great way off, thou sawest him, and haddest compassion on him, and rannest vnto him, falling vpon his necke, and kissing him: thou broughtest foorth the best garment, and puttest a ring on his finger, and shooes on his feete: thou killedst that fatte calfe, and madest all the house merrie, saying: Let vs eate and be merrie, for this my sonne was dead, and is aliue againe, he was lost and is now found. Why diddest thou all this (Lorde God?) Surely, because thou louedst trueth. Loue therefore (O father of mercies( [Page] this trueth in mee, which returne vnto thee from a farre countrie: runne towardes me, and geue me a kisse of thy mouth: geue me those cheefe garmentes, drawe mee into thy house, kill the fatte calfe, that they all which trust in thee, may reioyce in me: and let vs eate together in spirituall feastes. O Lorde, wilt thou exclude me alone? And wilt thou not keepe this truth vnto me? If thou shouldest looke narrowly on our wickednesse (O Lord,) Lorde who might abide thee? But (Lorde) thou wilt not be so streight vnto vs: for thou louest [Page] trueth, yea and that with a feruent & incomprehensible loue. Which is the trueth that thou so louest? Is it not thy sonne that thou so louest? Is it not thy sonne that said, Iohn. 14. I am the way, the trueth, & the life? He is the verie trueth, of whom all trueth is named in heauen and earth. This is it that thou hast loued, and in it onely hast thou delited: for thou diddest finde it pure, and without spotte, and wouldest that it should die for sinners. Keepe therefore (O God) this trueth. Behold, I am a greate sinner, in whom thou maist keepe it, to whom [Page] thou maist forgiue manie sinnes, whom thou maist purifie in the bloude of Christ, and whom thou maist redeeme through his passion. Why (O Lorde) hast thou geuen me this knowledge of thy Sonne, and this faith of him? Because I should see my redemption, and not atteine to it, that I might by that means be the more vexed with sorowe? God forbid. But rather, that I may perceiue the remission of my sinnes, purchased by Christes bloude, and so by his grace may obtaine it.
Purge me therefore, and redeeme me (O Lorde:) for thou [Page] hast vttered to me the vnknowne and secreat pointes of thy wisedome, that this knoweledge may helpe me, and bring mee vnto health: for truly, the Philosophers neuer knewe these thinges, they were vnknowne to them: and no man knewe these things (except a fewe, whō thou louest entirely, before thy sonnes incarnation). The curious searchers of the worlde (I meane the wise men of the worlde) lifted vp their eyes aboue Heauen, and yet coulde not finde this thy wisedome: For thou hast hidde these thinges from the wise and prudent, and [Page] hast opened them vnto babes: That is, to humble Fishers, and to thy holy Prophets, which also haue vttered them vnto vs: and so hast thou vttered the vnknowne & secret things of thy wisedome and of thy scriptures vnto me. Why doe I knowe them in vaine? I know them surely in vaine, if they profit me not vnto my health and saluation. For the Philosophers, when they knew God by his meruellous creatures, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful, but waxed ful of vanities in their imaginations, & their foolish harts were blinded, when they [Page] counted them selues wise they became fooles. Wilt thou suffer me (Lorde) to be of their number? God forbid. For thou art euen mercie it selfe, which doth neuer vtterly forsake any man. Fauour therefore (Lorde,) fauoure and spare thy seruaunte, and commaunde him to be of the number of thy babes, that the vnknowne secretes of thy wisedome, which thou hast opened to him, may lead him to the fountaine of wisdome, which is on high: that thou maist be praysed in the worke of thy mercie, which thou doest exercise towardes thy seruaunt (Lorde,) [Page] which neuer forsakest them that trust in thee.
7 Sprinkle me (Lorde) with Hyssope, & so shall I be cleane. Thou shalt washe me, and then shall I be whiter then Snowe.
Because (Lorde) thou hast loued the trueth, and hast opened vnto me the vnknowne secrets of thy wisdome, I am well comforted, and I trust that thou wilt not cast me out of thy fauour, but that thou wilt sprinkle me with Hyssope, and so shall I be clensed. Hyssope is a lowe hearb, it is hot, and of a good sauour: which signifieth nothing else, but thy only [Page] sonne our Lorde Iesus Christ, which humbled him self vnto the death, euen vnto the death of the Crosse, which with the heate of his feruent charitie loued vs, and washed vs from our sinnes in his bloud: which with the redolent sauour of his beneuolence & righteousnesse replenished the whole worlde. Therefore with thy Hyssope shalt thou sprinkle me, when thou doest powre vpon me the vertue of his precious bloud: when Christ through faith shall dwell in me: when through loue I am ioyned with him, when I shall counterfet his humilitie and [Page] passion. Then shall I be cleansed frō all my vncleannesse, then shalt thou wash me with my owne teares, which flowe out of the loue of Christ, then shal I sigh vntill I be wearie: & shall water my bed euery night with my teares, so that it shal swim in them: and then shalt thou wash me, & I shall be whiter than snow. Snow is white & cold, but (Lord) if thou sprinkle me wt Hyssope, I shall be whiter than snow: for I shall be throughly endued with thy bright light, which passeth al bodily whitenesse. And whē I am inflamed wt thy light, I shal forsake all my carnall concupiscences, [Page] colde vnto worldlie things, and hotte vnto heauenlie.
8 Vnto my hearing shalt thou geue ioy and gladnesse, and my brused bones shall be refreshed.
Then (Lorde) shall I pray vnto thee earely, (that is in the beginning of light,) then shalt thou here my voyce, & I shal heare what the Lord God shall speake in me: for he shall speake peace for his people, and shal geue me peace: for I haue trusted in thee. Vnto my hering shalt thou geue ioy & gladnes, when I shal heare those comfortable words that Marie heard. And what hard Marie, (I speake [Page] of that Marie which sate at the feete of Iesus) Matth. 26. What heard shee? Thy faith hath saued thee, go thy wayes in peace. Let me also here that the theefe heard: This day shalt thou be with me in Paradise. Then shall I haue ioy for the remission of my sinns, and gladnesse for thy bounteous and liberall promises. Shall I not reioyce and be glad, when thou shalt geue me two folde for all my sinnes? Then shall I beginne to tast how sweet the Lord is, then shall I learne to be conuersant in heauenly thinges, and shall say with the Prophet, How [Page] great & plentifull is that sweetnesse (Lorde) which thou hast layed vp for them that feare thee? Then shall I reioyce and be glad, and my brused bones shall be refreshed. What are the bones that sustaine the flesh, but the powers of our soule, and reason, that beare vp the frailtie of our fleshe, that it runne not headlonge into all vices, that a man fall not wholy into vanitie, and so consume awaye? These bones (I saye) are sore brused, for our reason is very weake, and our will is prone and redie to all mischefe: for euen now the flesh obeyeth [Page] not reason, but reason must obey the fleshe, so that I cannot resist vice, for my bones are brused. And why are they brused? For They haue forsaken thee, the fountaine of liuing water, and haue digged for them selues cisternes full of chinkes, which can holde no water. For they are not filled with thy grace, with out which no man can liue well: for without thee wee can do nothing. They trusted in their owne power, which is no power, and therefore decayed they in their owne foolishenesse. Therefore let thy power come (O Lorde,) and [Page] then shall thefe brused bones be refreshed. Let thy grace come, & that faith which worketh through loue. Let thy powers and giftes assist mee, and then my brused bones shall be refreshed: for my reason shall be merrie, my memorie glad, and my will full of ioy. And thus shal they al reioyce farre aboue their owne naturall strength: when they go about any good worke, they shall proceede, & prosper well, neither shall they leaue it vnperfecte, but through thy helpe shall they bring it to good passe and effecte.
9 Turne thy face from my [Page] sinnes, and wipe away all my wickednesse.
Why lookest thou (Lorde) vpō my sinnes? Why numberest thou them? Why considerest thou them so diligently? Doest thou not knowe, that man is euen as a flowre of the feeld? Why doest thou not rather looke on the face of Christ? Alas wretche that I am, why see I thee angry against me? I graunte I haue sinned. Howbeit, for thy gentlenesse haue mercie on me. Turne thy face frō my sinnes. Thy face is nothing but thy knowledge, turne awaye therefore thy knowledge, [Page] from my sinnes: I meane not that knowledge, wherewith thou seest and perceiuest all thinges: but that whereby thou approuest, and disallowest all things: whereby thou allowest the acceptable workes of the righteous, and condemnest the reprouable deedes of the wicked. Knowe not my sinnes on that maner, that thou wouldest impute them vnto me, and lay them to my charge: but rather turne away thy face from my sinnes, that through thy mercie they may be quenched. Looke (Lorde) on [Page] the creature whō thou hast made, looke vpō thine owne image: for I poore wretch haue put vpon me the image of the diuell, (that is sinne.) Turne away thy face from the image of the diuell, and be not angrie with me, and behold thine owne image, that thou maist haue mercy on me. O mercifull Lord, remember that thou lookedst vpon Zache, which did clime vp into a wild figge tree to see thee, & thou entredst into his house: which thou wouldest neuer haue done, if thou haddest looked on the image of the diuell, which he had put on him: but because thou sawest thine [Page] owne image in him, thou haddest compassion on him, and healedst him. He promised to geue one halfe of his goods to the poore, & if he had falsly deceiued any man, to restore it fourefolde, & be obtained mercie and health. Loe I bequeath my selfe euen wholy vnto thee, nothing reserued or kept backe, & I promise to serue thee for euer, with a pure heart, & will fulfill my promise all the dayes of my life. Wherefore then (Lorde) doest thou not looke on me thine image also? Why doest thou yet consider my sinnes? Turne (I beseeche thee) thy face from my [Page] sinnes, and wipe away all my wickednesse. Wipe away all (I pray thee) that none remaine. For it is written, He that keepeth the whole lawe, and offendeth in one point, is guiltie in the whole, That is to say, hath deserued damnation, which is the paine of all sinnes, that leade vnto death. Put out therefore all my wickednesse, that none offend thee, which shoulde bring me to condemnation.
10 A pure hearte create in mee (O God,) and an vpright spirit make a newe within me.
For my hearte hath forsaken [Page] mee, and goeth astray, vtterly forgetting his owne health. It is wandred into straunge countries, and followeth after vanities, and the eyes thereof are in the vttermost coastes of the worlde. I called it againe, but it answeared me not. It is gone, lost, and solde vnder sinne. What nowe Lorde? What shall I say? A pure heart create in me O God. An humble heart, a courteous heart, a peaceable heart, a gentle heart, a deuoute hearte, suche an heart as will neither doe another man hurte, neither aduenge him selfe, when he is offended, [Page] but rather doe good against euill: and suche an heart, as will loue thee aboue all thinges, whiche will speake of thee, and thanke thee, which will delight in Hymnes and spirituall songes, and be wholy conuersant in heauenlie thinges. Create this heart in me (O God) create it of nothing, that it may be of suche efficacie, through grace, as nature is able to make it. This grace commeth onely of thee into the soule, through thy creation, it is the beautie of a pure heart, it draweth vnto it all vertue, and expelleth all vice: therefore create [Page] in me (O God) a pure heart, through thy grace, and make a newe and vpright spirite in my bowelles. For thy spirite shall leade me into a right way, which shall purge me from all earthlie affections, and shall lifte me vp vnto heauenlie thinges. The louer, and the thing that is loued, are both of one nature. He that loueth bodily thinges, is worldlie: but he that loueth spirituall thinges, is spirituall. Geue me a spirite, that I may loue thee, and worship thee, the most high spirite: For God is a spirite, and they that worshippe him, must [Page] worshippe him in the spirit, and in veritie. Geue me therefore an vpright spirite, not seeking his owne praise and profite, but the honour and glorie of God. Renew an vpright spirite within me. Renew it: for my sinnes haue quenched the first that thou gauest me. Geue me now a new spirit, that it may redresse that thing which is inueterate and olde. My soule is also a spirit, and so made of thee, that of her selfe she is right: for of her owne nature she loueth thee aboue her selfe, and desireth all thinges for thy glorie, so that her owne naturall [Page] loue is right, for it commeth of thee: but of her owne froward will it is inueterate, old, and polluted, causing her naturall loue to decay. Make new therefore this spirit, and this loue, through thy grace, that it may walke in the right way, according to his nature: renew it (I say) that it may euer inflame me with heauenly loue, that it may euer cause me to sigh vnto thee, to imbrace thee continually, and neuer to forsake thee.
11 Cast me not away from thy face: and thy holie Ghost take not from me.
Beholde, (Lorde) I stande before thy face, that I may finde mercie, I stande before thy benigne goodnesse, looking for thy fauourable answeare, cast me not away confounded from thy face. Who came euer (Lorde) vnto thee, and went away confounded? Who euer desired thy fauoure, and went without it? Surely thou passest in thine aboundant pitie, both the deseruinges, and also the desires of them that pray vnto thee: for thou geuest more than men can desire, yea, or vnderstande when they haue it. It was neuer heard, [Page] that thou diddest cast away from thy face any man that euer came vnto thee. Shall I (O Lorde) be the first then that shalbe cast away from thy face, and vtterly confounded? Wilt thou beginne at me, to confounde them that come vnto thee? Wilt thou neuermore haue mercie and compassion? God forbid. The woman of Chanaan followed thee: she cried, & made a pitious noise, she moued thy Disciples to compassion, and thou heldest thy peace, she continued knocking, she worshipped thee, and saide: Lorde helpe me: Neither yet [Page] wouldest thou answeare. Thy disciples entreated for her, saying, Let her goe, for she crieth after vs. But what was thine answeare (Lorde) I pray thee? What diddest thou answeare? Forsooth, that she did weepe in vaine, and labour for nought: for thou sayedst, that Thou wast not sent, but vnto the sheepe that were perished of the house of Israel. What shoulde this woman doe, when she hearde these woordes? Verily euen despaire, as concerning the grace that she required: and yet despaired she not, but trusting in thy mercie, [Page] prayed yet againe, saying: Lorde helpe me. Vnto whose importunitie (Lorde) thou aunswearedst, It is not good to take the childrens bread, and cast it vnto houndes. As though thou shouldest haue geuen her a full answeare, and sayed, Departe from me, you Chanaanites are dogges, you are Idolaters: the pretious giftes of heauenlie fauour perteine not vnto you, I oughte not to take them away from the Iewes, which worship the true and liuing God, and to geue them to such dogges as ye are, which worshippe idols, and [Page] diuelles. What shalt thou nowe doe, thou woman of Chanaan? Thou mayest be ashamed, and get thee away: for the Lorde is not angrie with thee alone, but also thy whole nation. O Lorde God, who woulde not haue bene confounded, and haue peaked away at these woordes? Who woulde not haue mumbled and grudged against thee? Who woulde not haue iudged thee to be cruell? And yet did this woman continue still in prayer. She cast not away her confidence, she tooke not these woordes heauily, she was not angrie, but she humbled [Page] her selfe the more, and aboade still in her petition, and saide with good affiaunce? It is trueth Lorde that thou saiest, but I aske no bread, I aske not the fauour that the children shoulde haue: I am a little whelpe, and desire the crumbes which fall from the childrens table. Let them flourish, and abounde with miracles and other gratious fauoures: but let not me be destitute of this crumbe of grace, that my daughter may be deliuered from the feends possession: for the whelps doe eate of the crumbes whiche fall from their maisters table. [Page] Beholde, what faith, what trust, and what humilitie was in this woman. Therefore, thou being not displeased with her importunate instance, but reioycing in her excellent constancie, diddest say, O woman, greate is thy faith, be it vnto thee as thou wilt. Why are these thinges written Lorde God? That wee may learne to trust in thee, that we may humbly and deuoutly continue in prayer: for thou wilte geue it, if men be greedie. But the kingdome of heauen suffereth violence, & they that make violence vnto it, catche it. For [Page] what thinges so euer are written, are written for our learning, that through patience and comfort of the scriptures, we may haue hope. Cast me not therefore (Lorde) from thy face, which stande weeping and wayling day & night before thy face, not that thou shouldest deliuer me from the bodily oppression of diuelles, but that thou wouldest deliuer my soule from his spirituall power and dominion. Let me not be ashamed (O sweete Iesu:) for in thee onely haue I trusted, I haue no health nor comfort but in thee (O Lorde:) for all haue [Page] forsaken me: euen my brethren and children haue cast me off, and mine owne bowelles abhorre me. I haue none other helper but onely thee. Cast me not therefore away from thy face, and take not thy holy spirit from me. There is no man that can say, Iesus is the Lorde, but by the holy Ghost. Therefore I call vpon thee, Lorde Iesu, and that doe I in the holie Ghost. If I be sorie for my sinnes, which are passed, if I aske forgiuenesse, this doe I verily by the holie Ghost. Therefore, I beseeche thee, take thou not from me thy [Page] holy Ghost, but graunt that it may abide with me, and labour with me: For we wote not what to desire, as we ought. But the spirite helpeth our infirmities, and maketh vs to pray with such sorowful groninges as can not be expressed with tongue. Therefore, take not away this thy holy spirit from me, that he may teach me to pray, and helpe me in my labour, and may cause me to continue in prayers and teares, that at the length I may finde fauour before thy face, and may serue thee all the dayes of my life.
[Page]12 Make me againe to reioyce in thy sauing health, and strengthen me with a principall spirit.
It is a greate thing that I desire, (O Lorde:) howebeit, seeing thou art God, great Lord, and king ouer all gods, he doeth thee iniurie, which asketh small thinges of thee. All transitorie and corruptible thinges are but small in thy sight: but spirituall and euerlasting thinges are great and pretious. Take away the spirite and soule from the bodie, and what remaineth, but moste vile dongue, dust, and a vaine [Page] shadowe? As therefore the difference is great betweene the bodie and his shadowe: so may I conclude, that he whiche asketh bodily thinges, asketh but vaine trifles: but he that desireth spirituall thinges, doeth desire greate thinges, but specially he, that desireth thy sauing health.
What is thy sauing health, but Iesus thy Sonne, who is verie GOD, and euerlasting life? Why shall I not then aske of thee this my Sauiour, seeing thou art a mightie, and a most liberall father, which gauest him vnto the death of the crosse for me? Now, [Page] sith thou hast so offered him for mee, why shoulde I be ashamed to aske him of thee? It is a great and a noble present, neither am I worthie to haue suche a gifte: howbeit, it becommeth thy liberalitie to geue such noble giftes. For this therefore thine vnspeakeable gentlenesse, I dare presume to come boldly vnto thee, and to desire thy sauing health, in whom I mighte fully reioyce. For, If of his carnall father, any sonne asketh fishe, will he reache him a Serpent? And if he aske an egge, will he geue him a Scorpion? [Page] Or if he aske bread, will he geue him a stone? Nowe, if carnall fathers beeing euill, and sinners, will geue vnto their children good giftes, (whiche they haue receiued of thee:) howe muche more thou heauenlie Father, which of thine owne substaunce art good, wilte geue a good spirite to them that desire it of thee? Beholde thy sonne which is returned from a farre countrie, sorowing and repenting, asketh of thee fish of faith: for as the fish lieth secret vnder the water, euen so is Faith of such thinges as are not seene [Page] He asketh (I say) true faith, that he may reioyce in thy sauing health. Wilt thou reache him a serpent? Wilt thou geue him the venome of vnfaithfulnesse, whiche proceedeth from the olde and crooked serpent the diuell? I desire of thee (O Lord) the egge of hope, that euen as out of an egge we hope for a chicken: so throughe hope, that thou wilte graunt me to come vnto the sight of thy sauing health, that out of my hope may come this wholesome sight. And as the chicken commeth out of the egge: so I desire the egge of hope, that my [Page] soule through hope being staied in this vale of teares, may reioyce in thy sauing health. Wilt thou geue me the scorpion of desperation? That as a scorpion hath poyson in the ende of her taile: so I, in the last ende of my life, shoulde reserue sinne, delighting my selfe therein, and taking my pleasure in the intisementes of this worlde, which seeme beautifull and flattering, euen as a scorpion doeth in the face. I desire of thee (O Lorde,) the bread of Christes charitie, by the which he doeth communicate him selfe (euen as bread) vnto all men, [Page] that I may euer reioyce in thy sauing health. Wilt thou geue me a stone, that is to say, hardnesse of heart? GOD forbidde. Why shall I then mistrust to desire and obteine great thinges of thee (O Lorde,) seeing thou stirrest me vp, and biddest me aske, and knocke, euen till I seeme importunate? And what thing can I aske, which thou shalt bee better content withall, or else that shoulde be more wholesome to mee, than that thou shouldest make me reioyce in thy sonne my sauing health. Nowe haue I tasted howe sweete the Lorde is, [Page] howe easie and pleasaunt his burthen is. I remembred what peace and tranquillitie of minde I was in, when I ioyed in GOD, and reioyced in Christ my Lorde and Sauiour. Therefore am I nowe in more sorrowe, for I knowe what goodnesse and commoditie I haue loste, therefore will I crie more importunately. Make me againe to reioyce in thy sauing health. Restore me againe the thing whiche my sinnes haue loste. Restore me that which throughe my faulte is perished in me.
Restore me (I beseech thee, for his sake, that euer is on thy right hande, and maketh intercession for vs,) thy gracious fauour, that I may perceiue, that through him thou art pacified towardes me, that it may be as a seale vnto my hearte, that I may say with the Apostle Saint Paule, Galat. 2. I am crucified with Christ: I liue verily, yet now not I, but Christ liueth in me. But because my frailtie is greate, strengthen me with a principall spirit, that no troubles or afflictions may separat me from Christ, that no feare may cause me to denie [Page] thee, and that no paines may make me slide from thee. My strength is not sufficient to resist and fight with that olde serpent, and to preuaile against him. Peter hath taught me how great our infirmitie is, he saw thee with his bodilie eyes (Lorde Iesu,) and was most familiarly conuersant with thee, he tasted of thy glorie in the mounteine, when thou wast transfigured, he heard thy fathers voyce, he sawe thy manifold and wonderous woorkes: yea, and through thy power he wroughte many miracles. He walked on his feete vpon the waters, and [Page] hearde daily thy mightie and sweete wordes, he thought him selfe moste feruent and hotte in faith, and sayed, that he was readie to goe with thee both into prison, and vnto verie death. And when thou toldest him, that he shoulde denie thee, he beleeued thee not: he trusted in his owne strength, and trusted more vnto him selfe, being but a man, than vnto thee, being verie God. But when the handmaid cast out these wordes, and sayed vnto him, Thou art of the same companie: He was afraide by and by, and denied it. There came another [Page] maide, and sayed: Surely thou art of the flocke: And he denied it againe. He coulde not stande before the women, howe shoulde he then stande before Kinges, and Tyrantes? And when he was yet once more enquired of the standers by, and was accused to be one of thy Disciples, he began to curse, and to sweare, that he knewe thee not.
What saied he thinke you? I suppose that he sware by God, and by the lawe of Moses, that he knewe thee not, adding suche wordes of the fleshe:
Thinke you that I am a disciple of this Samaritane, which deceiueth the people, which is inspired with the diuel, & destroyeth our law? I am the disciple of Moses, & knowe not whence this fellowe is. Blessed be God, that they ceassed inquiring any further, for else woulde he neuer haue ceassed denying thee, so that a thousand interrogations would haue made a thousand flatte negations: yea, a thousand curses and periuries: yet were these interrogations but words. What would he haue done (I pray thee) if they had scourged him, and buffetted [Page] him well? Truely he would haue sought and proued all meanes, of denying, forswearing, cursing, and blaspheming, vntill that he had escaped their handes. But thou (most meeke Lorde) lookedst backe vpon him, and by and by he acknowledged his offence. Neither durst he yet leape into the middest of them, and confesse thee to be the sonne of God: for he was not yet strengthened with power from aboue, so that without doubt he woulde haue denied thee againe, if he had seene any ieopardie at hande. Therefore, as it was most meete for him, he [Page] went foorth, and wept bitterly. But thou, after thy resurrection, appearedst vnto him, and comfortedst him, and yet hid he himselfe for feare of the Iewes. He sawe thee gloriously ascending into Heauen, and was strengthened by the sight, and comforted of Angels, and yet durst he not goe abroade: for he had learned by experience, to knowe his owne fragilitie, and had proued his weakenesse. Therefore did he tarrie and wayte for the holie Ghost, whiche was promised. When he was come, and had filled Peters [Page] hearte with grace, then stepte he foorth, then began he to speake, and then with greate power and signes bare he witnesse of thy resurrection. Then feared he neither the highe Priests, neither yet Kinges, but reioyced in tribulations, and receiued the crosse with all ioy and gladnesse. Therefore strengthen me (Lorde) with a principall spirite, that I may continually reioyce in thy sauing health, or else can I not beare so many assaultes preuailing against me. The fleshe coueteth contrarie to the spirite. [Page] The worlde assaileth me on euerie side. The diuell sleepeth not. Geue me the strength of thy spirite, that there may fall by my side a thousand, and by my right hand tenne thousands: that I may both constantly and Christianly beare witnesse of thy faith. For, if Peter, whom thou enduedst with so manie notable giftes, did fall so wretchedly: what shoulde I doe (Lord) which haue neither seene thy naturall presence, neither haue tasted of thy glorie in the mounteine, neither haue seene thy gratious miracles? Yea, and scarsely perceiued thy maruellous [Page] woorkes, and neuer hearde thy voyce, but haue bene euer subdued vnder sinne? Therefore, strengthen me with a principall spirit, that I may perseuere in thy seruice, and giue my life for thy sake.
13 I will instruct the wicked, that they may knowe thy wayes: and the vngodlie shall be conuerted vnto thee.
Ascribe not this (Lorde) vnto presumption, if I go aboute to teach the vngodlie thy wayes: for I desire not to teache, as I am vnrenewed and wicked, vngodlie, and vnder the bondes of [Page] sinne: but if thou make me againe to reioyce in thy sauing health, if thou strengthen me with a principall spirite, & if also thou set me free, then shall I teach the vngodlie thy wayes. Neither is this hard vnto thee, whiche of verie stones canst raise vp children vnto Abraham, neither can my sins be an impediment to thee, if thou wilt doe this: but rather where sinne aboundeth, there aboundeth grace. Paule yet breathing out thretnings and slaughter against the Disciples of the Lord, receiued commission, that if he founde any, whether they were men, or [Page] women, which followed thee, & professed thy faith, he shoulde bring them prisoners to Hierusalem. And foorth was he going, like a madde harebraine, and as a rauening wolfe, raunging abroad to rauish and kill thy sheepe. But whiles he was yet in his iorney, euen in the heat of his persecutiō, and in actuall doing of his sinne: whiles he was persecuting thee, and would haue slaine thy chosen, hauing no maner of preparatiue vnto grace, neither yet knowledge of his sinne, when with his heart and will he was thine aduersary, blasphemed, & cursed thee: [Page] Beholde, the voyce of thy mercifull pitie vnto him, saying, Saule, Saule, why persecutest thou me? By the which voyce he was immediately both laide along, and raised vp: he was layed along, and ouerthrowen, as concerning his bodie: but he was raised vp with the minde. Thou raisedst him vp that was in darke ignorance, and powredst thy glorious light into those eyes, which were oppressed with blind sleepe, thou shewedst him thy fauourable face, and enduedst him with thy gratious mercie. Then was he raised, as it had bene [Page] from death, he opened his eyes, he sawe thee, and sayed: Lorde, what wilt thou that I doe? And after diddest thou send a sheepe to this woolfe: for thou commaundedst Ananias to goe vnto him: and then was he baptised, and anon was he replenished with the holy Ghost, and was made a chosen vessell, to beare thy name before Kinges, nations, and the children of Israel. And without delay he entred into the Synagogues, and preached thy name stoutly, affirming that thou are Christ: he disputed, preuayled, and confounded the Iewes. Beholde [Page] (Lord,) euen streight of a persecutour, thou madest him a preacher, and suche a preacher, that laboured more than all the other Apostls. O how great is thy power? If thou wilt of a wicked man, make a righteous: or of a persecutor a preacher: who shall denie thee? who shall resiste thee? who may say vnto thee, Why doest thou so? All thinges that thou wouldest haue, thou madest, in Heauen, and in Earth, in the Sea, and in all bottomlesse deepes. Therefore impute it not to arrogancie, if I couet through thy power, and not mine [Page] own, to teach the wicked thy wayes: for I knowe, that I can offer nothing, which can be so acceptable in thy godly sight. This is the most pleasaunt sacrifice, and also for my singular prosite. Now if thou chaunge me into another man, then will I teache the wicked thy wayes: not the wayes of Plato, and Aristotle not the intricate and subtile propositions of mans wit, not the instructions of Philosophie, not the painted woordes and vaine coloures of the Rhetoricians, not worldlie matters and policies, not vnfruitefull [Page] wayes of vanitie, not wayes that leade men into death. But thy wayes will I teache them, and thy preceptes, which leade vnto life: neither will I teache them onely one way, but many wayes: for many are thy commaundementes: howbeit, all these wayes doe ende in one, that is to say, in loue and charitie, which doeth so vnite and knitte the faithfull hearts, that they haue one minde, and one will in God. Or else may we vnderstande, by thy manie wayes, the diuerse manner of liuing, wherein euery man walketh according to his vocation: some [Page] married, some liuing chaste in widowhood, some virgines, and so foorth. These walke after diuerse wayes, into their heauenlie inheritaunce, euery man choosing one, in the which he may best subdue his rebellious members. Thus will I teache the wicked thy wayes, according to their capacitie and condition. And the vngodlie shalbe conuerted vnto thee, for I will preach vnto them, not my selfe, but Christ crucified: and they shalbe conuerted, not vnto my praise: but vnto thee, geuing thee all honor and praise: they shall leaue their own wayes, [Page] and come vnto thine, that they may walke in them, and so consequently attaine vnto thee.
14 Deliuer me from bloud (O God,) the GOD of my health, and my tongue shall exalt thy righteousnesse.
I am stiffled in muche bloud, and from the deapth of it shall I crie to thee O Lorde, hearken vnto my voyce. Tarie not (Lord:) for I am euen at the verie pointe of death. This bloud that I speak of, are my sinnes: for as the bodily life consisteth in the bloud: euen so is the life of a sinner in his sinne. Powre out the [Page] bloud, and the beast dieth: powre out the sinne, acknowledging it vnto GOD, and the sinner dieth, and is made righteous. Neither am I wrapped in bloud, but ouerwhelmed and drowned in bloude: full streames of bloud doe driue me vnto Hell, helpe me (Lord,) leaste I perishe. O God which gouernest all things, which onely canst deliuer me, in whose hande is the spirite of life, ridde and purge me from this bloude. Deliuer me from bloude (O GOD) the author of my health, God in whom onely consisteth my saluation. [Page] Deliuer me (Lorde) as thou deliueredst Noe, from the waters of the floud. Deliuer me, as thou deliueredst Lot, from the fire of Sodome. Deliuer me, as thou deliueredst the children of Israel, from the deapth of the redde sea. Deliuer me, as thou deliueredst Ionas, from the bellie of the whale. Deliuer me, as thou deliueredst the three children, from the fornace of burning fire. Deliuer me, as thou deliueredst Peter, from the perill of the Sea. Deliuer me, as thou deliueredst Paul, from the depth of the Sea. Deliuer me, as thou hast deliuered [Page] infinite sinners, from the power of death, and from the gates of Hell. Then shall my tongue triumph in thy righteousnes, that is, for thy righteousnesse, which I shall feele and perceiue in me, through thy gratious fauour. For thy righteousnesse (as the Apostle saith, Romanes. 3.) commeth by faith of Iesus Christe, vnto all, and vpon all them that beleeue in him. Then shall my tongue triumphe in praysing this thy righteousnesse, commending thy fauour, magnifying thy pittie, & acknowledging my sinnes that thy mercie may be declared [Page] in me, which wouldest vouchsafe to iustifie suche a greate sinner, and that all men may knowe, that thou sauest them, which trust in thee, and deliuerest them from extreme anguish and aduersitie (O Lorde our God.)
15 Lorde open thou my lipps, and then my mouth shall shewe foorth thy praise.
Thy praise is a great thing (O Lorde:) for it proceedeth out of thy fountaine, whereof no sinner drinketh. It is no glorious praise that commeth of a sinners mouth. Deliuer me therefore from bloude (O Lorde,) the [Page] God of my health, and my tongue shall magnifie thy righteousnesse. Then shalt thou Lorde open my lippes, and my mouth shall shewe forth thy praise. For thou hast the keye of Dauid, which shuttest, and no man openeth: and openest, and no man shutteth. Therefore open thou my lippes, as thou openedst the mouthes of infantes, and suckelinges, out of whose mouthes thou hast stablished thy praise. These truely were thy Prophetes, Apostles, & other Saints, which haue praised thee wt a single & pure heart & mouth: & not the Philosophers & Orators, [Page] which haue sayed, We will magnifie our tongue, Our lippes be in our owne power, Who is our God? They opened their owne mouthes, and thou openedst them not, neither yet stablishedst thy prayse out of their mouthes. Thy infantes (Lorde) praysed thee, and despised themselues: The Philosophers wente aboute to prayse themselues, and magnifie their owne name. Thy sucklinges extolled thy fame and glorie, which they knewe throughe heauenlie fauour: The Philosophers knowing thee onely by naturall creatures, coulde neuer [Page] perfectly expresse thy renowme. Thy Saintes magnified thee with their hearte, mouth, and good workes: The Philosophers only with words, & their own subtile imaginations. Thy children haue spread thy glorie throughout all the worlde: The Philosophers haue instructed but a fewe of their owne adherentes. Thy friendes, with spreading thy glorie, haue conuerted innumerable men from sinne vnto vertue, and from miserie vnto true felicitie: The Philosophers neither knew true vertue, neither yet true felicitie. Thy welbeloued haue preached [Page] openly thy bountifull gentlenesse & mercifull fauour, which thou shewedst in thy deere sonne vnto all the world: but the Philosophers coulde neuer attaine to knowe it. Therefore, out of the mouth of infantes and sucklinges hast thou stablished thy praise: for it hath euer pleased thee to exalt the humble, and to bring lowe the proud. Now, seing thou doest euer resiste the proude, geue me true humilitie, that thou maist stablishe thy praise by my mouth. Geue me a childes hearte: For, except I turne backe, and beecome as a [Page] childe, I can not enter into the kingdome of heauen. Make me as one of the infantes, or suckelinges, that I may euer hang on the teates of thy wisedome: for thy teates are better than wine, and thy wisedome better than all riches: so that nothing can be compared vnto it, for it is to men an infinite treasure: and they that vse it, are made partakers of the friendship of God. Therefore, if thou makest me a childe, then shalt thou stablish thy praise in my mouth: for then shalt thou open my lippes, and my mouth shall shewe foorth thy praise, [Page] and shall perfectly declare it, euen as thou hast published it by the mouth of thine infantes, and suckelinges.
16 If thou hadst desired sacrifices, I had surely offered them: but thou delightest not in burnt sacrifices.
My mouth (Lorde) shall shew forth thy glorious fame. For I knowe, that this thing is moste acceptable to thee, sith thou sayest by the Prophet, Psalme. 49. The sacrifice of praise shall glorifie me, and by that meanes shall I be entised to shewe him my sauing health. Therefore [Page] will I offer praise vnto thee, euen the praise of infantes and sucklinges, for my sinnes. And why shall I offer for my sinnes rather praise, than sacrifice? For if thou haddest desired sacrifice, I had surely offered them: but thou delightest not in burnt sacrifices. Canst thou be pacified with the bloud of Calues or Goates? Wilt thou eate the flesh of Bulles: or drinke the bloude of Goates? Either doest thou desire Golde, which possessest Heauen and Earth? Either wilte thou that I sacrifice my bodie vnto thee, whiche desirest not the [Page] death of a sinner, but rather that he were conuerted and liue? Neuerthelesse, I will chasten my flesh in a measure, that (through thy grace) it may be subdued vnto reason, and obey it: for in this pointe also, if I passe measure, and bring my bodie so lowe, that it is vnapte to serue my neighbour, and to do that office which is appointed me of God, it shalbe imputed vnto me for sinne. Let your seruing of God be reasonable, saith the Apostle, Romans 12. And thou haste saide also by the Prophete, I require mercie, & not sacrifice. Osee. 6. [Page] Therfore shall my mouth shewe forth thy praise: For this oblation doeth honour thee, and sheweth vs the way vnto thy sauing health. My heart is readie (O GOD) my hearte is readie. It is readie, through thy grace, to doe all thinges, which are pleasaunt vnto thee: this one thing haue I founde most acceptable to thee, that will I offer to thee, that shall euer be in my heart, on that shall my lippes euer be harping. If thou haddest desired a bodily sacrifice, I would surely haue geuen it thee, for my heart is readie (through thy grace) to fulfill [Page] thy will: but in suche burnt sacrifice hast thou no delight. Thou madest the bodie for the spirite, therefore seekest thou spirituall thinges, and not bodilie: for thou sayest in a certaine place: Prouerbes, 14. My sonne geue thine heart vnto me. This is the hearte that pleaseth thee. Let vs offer vnto thee an heart, repenting with sorrowe of our sinnes, and inflamed with the loue of heauenlie thinges, and then wilte thou desire no more: for with suche a sacrifice wilte thou be content.
17 A sacrifice to God, is a [Page] broken spirite, a contrite and humble heart thou shalt not despise (O God.)
A broken spirite, and not broken flesh pleaseth thee (O Lord:) for the flesh is broken and vexed, because he hath not the carnall things that he desireth, or else feeleth in him selfe suche thinges as he hateth. But the spirite is broken and vnquieted for his faulte, because he hath offended against God whom he loueth. He soroweth, that he hath sinned against his maker and redeemer, that he hath despised his bloud, that he hath not regarded such a good and [Page] louing father. This broken and sorowing spirit, is vnto thee a sacrifice of most sweete sauour, which notwithstanding hath his confection of most bitter spices, euen of the remembraunce of our sinnes: For whiles our sinnes are gathered together, into the mortar of the heart, beaten with the pestle of compunction, made into powder of repentaunce, & watered with teares: thereof is made an ointment and sacrifice most sweet, which redolent offering thou wilt not despise, namely, a contrite & humble hearte. Therefore, he that breaketh his stonie hearte, [Page] which is made harde with the stone of sinne, that he may thereof prepare an oyntment of repentaunce, in abundaunce of teares, not despairing of the multitude and greeuousnesse of his sinnes, but humbly offering this sacrifice vnto thee, he shall in no wise be despised of thee. For a broken, and an humble hearte, thou wilt not despise (O God.) Marie Magdalene, whiche was a notable sinner, made such an oyntment, and put it in the Alabaster boxe of her hearte, she feared not to enter into the Pharisies house, she humbled her selfe flat before [Page] thy feete, she was not ashamed to weepe at meale time, she coulde not speake for inwarde sorrowe, but her heart melted into teares, with the which she washed thy feete: she wiped them with her haire, annoynted them with oyntment, & ceassed not kissing them.
Who euer sawe such another thing? Yea, who hath euer heard of a thing like vnto this? Surely, her sacrifice pleased thee well, and was so acceptable, that thou preferredst it aboue the Pharisie which in his own sight was righteous. Luke. 7. For it may be gathered by thy wordes, that [Page] there was so much difference betweene the righteousnesse of Marie, and the Pharisie, as there is difference betwene these two thinges: namely, to wash the feete with water, & to wash them with teares: to kisse one on the face, and not to ceasse to kisse the feete: to annoynt the head with oyle, & to annoynt the feete with moste pretious oyntment: yea, much more excelled she the Pharisie: for he neither gaue thee water, kisse, nor oyle. O great is thy power (Lord) great is thy might, which declareth it selfe moste bountifully, in sparing sinners, & [Page] hauing compassiō on them. Now see I well, that a contrite & meke hearte thou wilt not despise (O Lorde:) and therefore endeuour I my selfe to offer suche an hearte vnto thee. Neither is it enough that I say so outwardly: for thou art a God, which searchest our heartes and reines. Accepte therefore this my sacrifice: and if it be vnperfect, amend thou the default, which onely art of power so to doe: that it may be a burnt sacrifice, wholy inflamed with the heat of thy comfortable charitie, that it may be acceptable vnto thee, or at the least, that thou [Page] despise it not: for if thou despise it not, I knowe well, that I shall finde fauour before thee, and then shall none of thy Saintes, either in Heauen, or in Earth, despise me.
18 Deale gently of thy fauourable beneuolence with Sion, that the walles of Hierusalem may be built againe.
Because it is written, Vnto the holy man thou shalt be holy, & with the innocent shalt thou deale innocently: with the pure and chosen shalt thou doe purely, and with the wicked shalte thou play ouerthwartly, [Page] I am verie desirous that all men were saued, and that they should come vnto the knowledge of the trueth. Which thing were verie necessarie for them, and also for my profite. For by their prayers, exhortations, and examples, I might rise from this filthie sinne, and be prouoked daily to proceede vnto better. I beseech thee therefore (O Lorde,) although I be a sinner, that thou of thy fauourable beneuolence wouldest deale gently with Sion, that the walles of Hierusalem may be built againe. Sion is thy Church. For Sion, by interpretation, [Page] signifieth an high hill, or a place where a mā may see farre about him. And euen so thy Churche, through the grace of the holy Ghost, beholdeth a farre off the glorie of God, according to the capacitie of this life. And therefore said S. Paule, All we with an vncouered face, beholding, as in a glasse, the glorie of the Lorde, after the same image are transformed from glorie to glorie, as by the spirite of the Lorde. Lorde God, howe small is thy Churche at this day? Almost the whole worlde is fallen from thee, there are many [Page] moe miscreantes, than Christians: and yet among the Christians, how many are there that forsake worldly thinges, and seeke the glorie of the Lorde? Surely, ye shall finde fewe, in comparison of them which are addicted to worldlie thinges, whose God is their bellie, and glorie to their shame and confusion. Deale gently, Lorde, of thy fauourable beneuolence, with Sion, that it may be increased, both in multitude, and in good liuing. Behold from heauen, & deale gently, as thou art wont to do, that thou wilt send amōg vs the fire of charitie, [Page] which may consume all our sinns, Deale (Lorde) according to thy fauourable beneuolence, & doe not with vs after our deseruings, neither controll vs in iudgement, but chasten vs in mercie. Thou art our Lorde, our Father, & Redeemer. Thou art our hope, & euerlasting helth. Euery man desireth goodnesse of thee. If thou geue it them, then shall they gather it: if thou open thy handes, all shalbe filled with plentie. When thou turnest away thy face, then are they astonied. When thou gatherest in their breath, then are they dead, and returne into earth. [Page] Againe, when thou breathest on them, they are created againe: and thus renewest thou the face of the Earth. Lorde, I pray thee, what profite is there in the damnation of so many thousand men? Hell is full, and thy Church daily decreaseth. Arise (Lorde,) why sleepest thou so long? Arise, and deferre not vnto the ende. Deale gently of thy fauourable beneuolence with Sion, that the walles of Hierusalem may be builded againe. What is Hierusalem, (which by interpretation signifieth the vision of peace) but the holie congregation, and citie [Page] of the blessed: which is our mother? Her walles were decayed, when Lucifer, with his Angels, fell, into whose place the righteous are receiued. Deale therefore gently (O Lorde) with Sion, that the number of thy chosen may shortly be fulfilled, and that the walles of Hierusalem may be edified, and finished with newe stones, whiche shall euer praise thee, and endure euerlastingly.
19 Then shalt thou accepte the sacrifice of righteousnesse, oblations, and burnt offeringes, then shall they lay vppon [Page] thine altar fatte Calues.
When thou hast dealt gently, of thy fauourable will & beneuolence with Sion, then shalt thou accept the sacrifice of righteousnesse: for thou shalt consume it with the burning fire of thy loue and charitie. And so acceptedst thou the sacrifices of Moses, and Helias. And then acceptest thou the sacrifices of righteousnesse, when thou fattenest (with thy grace) the soules which endeuoure themselues to liue righteously. What profiteth to offer sacrifices vnto thee, when thou acceptest them not? O Lorde, howe many sacrifices [Page] offer wee nowe adayes, whiche are not pleasaunt vnto thee, but rather abhominable? For we offer not the sacrifices of righteousnesse, but our owne ceremonies: and therefore are they not accepted nor regarded of thee. Where is nowe the glorie of the Apostles? Where is the valiaunt perseuerance of martyrs? Where is the fruit of Preachers? Where is that holy simplicitie of Heremites, whiche vsed to liue solitarily? Where are the vertues and woorkes of true Christians, which were in olde time? Then shalt thou accept their sacrifices, [Page] when thou shalt decke and garnishe them with thy grace and vertue.
Also, if thou deale gently, of thy fauourable beneuolence with Sion, then shalt thou delight in sacrifices of righteousnesse. For the people shall begin to liue well, to keepe thy commaundementes, and to deale iustly: and so shall thy people be endued with thy benefites, and blessinges. Then shall the oblations of the Priestes, and of the Clergie, he acceptable vnto thee: for they shall forsake their carnall affection, and endeuour themselues vnto a more perfecte [Page] life, and so the oyntement of thy blessing shall descend vpon their heades. Then shall the burnt offerings of good men be pleasant vnto thee: for they shall cast out all brousie sluggishnesse, and false confidence, and bee wholy inflamed, and made perfect, with the burning fire of Gods loue. Then shall the Bishoppes, and Preachers, lay Calues vpon thine altar: for after they are consummate & made perfect in all kinde of vertues, replenished with thy holy spirit, and indued with true Christianitie, they shall not feare to geue their liues for their shepe. [Page] What is thine altar (sweete Iesu,) but the crosse wherevppon thou wast offered? What signifieth a wanton calfe, but our bodie? Therefore, then shall they lay calues vppon thine altar, when they shall offer their owne bodies vppon the crosse, that is, when they shall prepare their bodies to suffer all afflictions, yea, euen verie death, for thy names sake. Then shall thy Church flourish, and enlage her coasts. Then shall thy praise be noysed from the last ende of the worlde. Then shall ioy and gladnesse fulfill the whole worlde. Then shall the Saintes [Page] reioyce in glorie, and shall make mirthe in their mansions, waiting for vs in the lande of the liuing. Accomplishe in mee, euen nowe (Lorde) and then, that thing which I so often name, that thou maist haue compassion on me according to thy great mercie, that thou maist receiue me for a sacrifice of good liuing, and for a calfe to be offered on thine altar, or crosse, by the which I may passe from the vale of miserie, vnto that ioy, which thou hast prepared for them that loue thee. Amen.
¶ A meditation of the same Hierome, vppon the. 31. Psalme, intituled, In te Domine speraui: which (preuented by death) he coulde not finishe.
HEauinesse hath beseeged mee, with a great and a strong host, she hath inclosed me, she hath oppressed my heart with clamours, and ceaseth not with weapons night and day to fight against me. My [Page] friendes be in her tentes, and are become mine enimies. Whatsoeuer I see, whatsoeuer I heare, bring banners of heauinesse before me. The memorie of my friends maketh me sad, the recording of my children greeueth me, the considring of my charge & duty vexeth me, the reuoluing of my studies maketh me pensiue: finally, the thinking on my sinnes oppresseth me. For like as to them whiche be sicke of the Axesse, all sweete thinges seeme bitter: so to me all thinges be turned into sorowe & heauinesse. Vndoubtedly, a great burden vpon the heart [Page] is this heauinesse. It is the venome of serpentes, it is a deadlie pestilence, it grudgeth against God, it ceaseth not to blaspheme, & it prouoketh to desperation. O vnhapie man that I am, who shall deliuer me frō her cursed handes? If all that I see & heare, followe her banners, and strongly fight against me, who shalbe my protector? Who shall helpe me? Whether shall I go? Whether shall I flee? What shall I doe? I will turne me to things inuisible. And who shalbe the guide of so high & terrible an hoast? Hope, which is of thinges inuisible. Hope (I [Page] say) shall come against heauines, and banquish her. Who can stand against hope? Heare what the Prophet saith, Thou (Lorde) art my hope, thou hast set thy refuge most high. Who shall stand against the Lord? Who can win his towre of refuge, which is most high? Wherefore I will call her, doubtlesse she wil come, & she wil not confounde me. Loe, nowe she commeth, she hath brought gladnesse, she hath taught me to fight, and she saide to me, Crie, cease not. And I saide, What shall I crie? Say, (quoth she) boldly and with all thy heart.
In te Domine speraui. Psalme. 31.
IN thee, O Lorde, haue I put my trust: let me neuer be confounded, deliuer me in thy righteousnesse:
2 Bowe downe thine eare to me: make haste to deliuer me: be vnto me a strong rocke, and an house of defence to saue me.
3 For thou art my rocke, and my fortresse therefore for thy names sake direct me & guide me.
4 Drawe me out of the net, [Page] that they haue layed priuily for me: for thou arte my strength.
5 Into thine hande I commende my spirit: for thou hast redeemed me, O Lord God of trueth.
6 I haue hated them that geue themselues to deceiptfull vanities: for I trust in the Lorde.
7 I wilbe glad and reioyce in thy mercie: for thou hast seene my trouble: thou hast knowen my soule in aduersities,
8 And thou hast not shut me vp in the hande of the enimie, but hast set my feete at large.
[Page]9 Haue mercie vppon me, O Lord: for I am in trouble: mine eye, my soule, and my bellie, are consumed with griefe.
10 For my life is wasted with heauinesse, and my yeeres with mourning: my strength faileth for my paine, & my bones are consumed.
11 I was a reproch among all mine enimies, but specially among my neighbours: and a feare to mine acquaintance, who seeing me in the streete, fled from me.
12 I am forgotten, as a dead man out of minde: I am like a [Page] broken vessell.
13 For I haue heard the railing of great men: feare was on euerie side, while they conspired together against me, & consulted to take my life.
14 But I trusted in thee, O Lorde: I saide, Thou art my God.
15 My times are in thine hand: deliuer me frō the hand of mine enimies, & from them that persecute me.
16 Make thy face to shine vppon thy seruant, and saue me through thy mercie.
17 Let me not be confoūded, [Page] O Lord: for I haue called vpon thee: let the wicked be put to confusion, and to silence, in the graue.
18 Let the lying lippes be made dumbe, which cruelly, proudly, and spitefully, speake against the righteous.
19 Howe great is thy goodnesse, which thou hast layed vp for them, that feare thee: and done to them, that trust in thee: euen before the sonnes of men?
20 Thou doest hide them priuily in thy presence from the pride of men: thou kepest them secretly in thy tabernacle from [Page] the strife of tongues.
21 Blessed be the Lorde: for he hath shewed his meruellous kindnes toward me in a strong citie.
22 Though I saide in mine haste, I am cast out of thy sight, yet thou heardest the voice of my prayer, when I cried vnto thee.
23 Loue ye the Lorde all his Saintes, for the Lord preserueth the faithfull, and rewardeth abundantly the proud doer.
24 All yee that trust in the Lorde, be strong, and he shall establish your heart.
[Page]1 IN thee, O Lord, haue I put my trust: let me neuer be confounded: deliuer me in thy righteousnesse.
O the wonderfull power of hope, whose face heauinesse can not abide. O the louelie lookes which she casteth vpon such as offer their armes to imbrace her at her comming. O the vnspeakable ioyes which shee kindleth in the heartes of them that giue her incerteinment. Nowe commeth comforte. Let heauinesse crie nowe, and struggle against me, with her armie. Let the worlde arise and rebell, let the enimies [Page] make insurrection, I feare nothing: for I trust (Lorde) in thee. Thou art my hope, for thou hast put thy refuge most high. I haue alreadie entered it, hope hath led me, I my selfe entered in boldly, she shall excuse mee before thee. Beholde, (quoth hope) O man, the most comfortable refuge of God, open thine eyes. God is alone, he onely is an infinite Sea of substaunce. Other thinges be so, as though they were not: for all thinges depende vppon him, and vnlesse he sustaine them, they shuld soudenly returne to naught: for of naught were they made. [Page] Consider the power of him, whiche in the beginning made Heauen and Earth. Doeth not he worke all thinges in all men? Who can moue his hande without him? Who can thinke any thing of himselfe? Ponder his wisedome, whiche in tranquillitie gouerneth all: for he seeth all, and to his eyes all thinges be naked and open. This is he, which onely knoweth how to deliuer thee, and onely can comforte and saue thee. Doe not trust in the children of men, in whom is no saluation. The heart of man is in his power, whither so euer he lusteth [Page] he will turne it. This is he, which knoweth the way how to helpe thee. Suspect not his power. Mistrust not his mercie. Ponder his goodnesse. Consider his tender loue. Is not he the louer of men, whiche for men became man, and for sinners was crucified? This is thy true father, which created thee, which redeemed thee, which doth good to thee. Whether can the father forsake his sonne? Cast thy selfe on him, and he will take thee vp, and saue thee. Search the scriptures, and thou shalte finde howe his great and tender loue shoulde [Page] moue thee to trust in him. And why doth he that? Verily, because he coueteth to saue thee. For what saith he, by the Prophet, Because he trusted in me, I will deliuer him. Loe, for none other cause he will deliuer him, but because he trusted in him. And what other thing haue the Prophetes, the Apostles: yea, the Lorde himselfe of the Apostles preached, but that men shoulde trust in the Lord? Sacrifice therfore (O man) the sacrifice of iustice, and trust in the Lorde, and he shall deliuer thee, and plucke thee out of all tribulation. O the [Page] great vertue of hope. Truely she is spredde abroade: for grace is powred into her lippes. O this is the true refuge (good Lorde,) to which the euill of heauinesse can not approch. These I knowe and vnderstand: therefore I trusted in thee, O Lorde. For though the weight of sinne doth greeuously presse me, yet I cannot despaire: for thy goodnesse so gently prouoketh mee to hope, that I can not be confounded for euermore. For a time I may bee confounded, and put to silence, but euermore sure I can not be lefte succourlesse.
For hope, which hath lead me into thy souereigne refuge, hath taught me to hope, and that not in temporall thinges, but in euerlasting things. For hope is of thinges inuisible: but those thinges that be seene, are temporall: and those things that be not sene, are euerlasting. Wherfore I hearing the wordes of hope, which commeth to plucke me out from the handes of heauinesse, haue trusted (Lorde) in thee, coueting before all thinges, to be deliuered from my sinnes, and through thy mercie and grace to atteine to things euerlasting, which be inuisible. [Page] This is my first and chiefest desire: for my sinnes be a great tribulation vnto me: for from it all other tribulations issue. Take away (Lorde) my sinnes, and I am free from all tribulation: for tribulation and pensiuenesse of minde proceedeth from the fountaine of the heart: for all heauinesse commeth of loue. If I loue my sonne, and he dieth, I am troubled: because I haue lost that I loued. Or if I loue not my seruant, and he dieth: I am not heauie: because I haue lost that I loued not. Take away therefore (Lord) my sinnes, through [Page] thy grace, what remaineth but that I shall loue thee with all my heart, and despise all temporall thinges as vaine? If then I haue thee by faith, of whō also I hope, that which neither eye hath sene, nor eare hath heard, nor hath not ascended into the heart of man, what thing can trouble me. That which I haue loste, that I loue not. In thee (lord) haue I trusted, like as my hope hath taught me to trust: therefore I shall not be confounded for euer: for thou shalt giue mee euerlasting thinges. Whosoeuer trusteth not in thee, but in his owne vanitie, shalbe [Page] confounded for euermore: for he shall descende to eternall confusion. I may be confounded temporally, both of thee & of all men: but I shall not be confounded for euermore. For of thee I may be confounded, while I desire to be deliuered frō temporall vexation, & peraduenture thou wilt not here me: truly then I am confounded temporally, but not for euermore: for it is not expedient, sith vertue is made perfect in infirmitie. And of men I am temporally confounded: and they preuaile against mee, when they pursue mee: but this also thou [Page] sufferest them to doe, that I should not be confounded for euer more. Wherefore, if before thee a thousand yeres be but as it were yesterday, which is passed away, I wil gladly suffer temporal confusion, that I be not confounded for euermore. I will trust in thee (O Lorde:) for hope hath taught me so to trust, and shortly I shalbe deliuered from all tribulation. By what merites shall I be deliuered? Not by mine (O Lord,) but by thy iustice and righteousnesse deliuer me. By thy iustice, I say, not by mine. I seeke mercie, I offer not iustice. But if by [Page] thy grace, thou wilte make mee righteous, then I haue thy iustice: for thy grace in vs is thy righteousnesse. The Pharisies trusted in workes of iustice, they trusted in their owne iustice, and righteousnesse: therefore they were not subiect to the iustice of God: for of the woorkes of the Lawe shall no creature be iustified with thee. But the iustice of God appeared by the grace of Iesu Christ: yea, without the workes of the Lawe. The Philosophers gloried in their iustice, and therefore they founde not thy iustice: because they entered not [Page] in by the doore; they were theeues and robbers, which came not to saue, but to destroy and slaie thy sheepe. Wherefore thy grace is thy iustice (O Lorde:) and it were no longer grace, if it were geuen of merites. Wherefore, not in my iustice, but in thy iustice, deliuer me from my sinnes: or else deliuer me in thy righteousnes, that is to wit, in thy sōne, which onely amongest men is founde iust. What is thy sonne, but the verie iustice in whiche men be iustified? Wherefore in thy iustice iustifie mee, and deliuer mee from my sinnes, that [Page] I may be also deliuered from other afflictions, which I suffer. Therefore, so that the cause be taken away, the effect will likewise folowe. Loe, thee O Lord I haue sought, and I am comforted, hope hath so taught me: I am replenished with ioy, because I trust in thee, therefore I shall not be confounded for euermore.
Heauinesse cōmeth againe with great purueiance, she is returned with swords & speares, on euerie side she is defended, wt great violence she marcheth, she hath beseeged our citie, the crie of her horsemen hath fered me, stāding wtout [Page] she commaundeth silence, and a farre off she speaketh, saying: O (saith she) loe, he that trusted in the Lorde, which said, I shall not be cōfounded for euermore, which hath followed hope, is comforted. And when she perceiued me, at these wordes, to waxe ashamed, approching nigh me, she sayed: Where be the promises of thy hope? Where is thy comforte? Where is thy deliueraunce? What haue thy teares profited thee? What haue thy prayers brought thee from heauen? Thou hast cryed, and no man hath aunswered thee. Thou hast wept, and [Page] no man hath beene moued with pitie on thee. Thou hast called vpon thy God, and he holdeth his peace. Thou hast desired helpe from Heauen, but thou art not regarded. Loe, what profite haue the wordes of hope brought thee? Thou hast laboured, and findest nothing in thine handes. Thinkest thou that God careth for the inhabitauntes of the earth? Nay, he walketh about the limittes of Heauen, and considereth not the matters of men. Thus she blaspheming spake, & when I shooke for feare at her woordes, approching, she spake in mine eare saying: [Page] Trowest thou those thinges be true which faith sheweth? Wilt thou see they be but mens phantasies? Thou shalt knowe hereby: for if God became man (as they say) and was crucified for men, could not so great a loue comfort man, which is brought in so great distresse, crying vnto him, & weeping? If (as they say) infinite goodnesse cause him to come downe from heauen, to take vpon him the crosse, how shoulde he not now come downe to miserable men, that he might comfort them? Howe many men (trowest thou) if they might come to thee, [Page] with their wordes and workes, as much as they might, woulde comfort thee, and also deliuer thee from all vexation? Why art thou not succoured from aboue by heauenly aide and comforte? Beleeue me, all thinges are gouerned by casualtie. There is nothing but that that is seene, your spirite shall vanishe away like smoke. Who euer came againe from Hell or Heauen, and tolde vs suche thinges as doe chaunce to soules after this life? These are but fables of foolishe women: arise therefore and flee to the helpes of men, [Page] that loose and set free from imprisonment and bondage. Thou maiest liue in pleasure: be not deceiued falsly of this thy hope, alwayes to be in paine and trouble.
These thinges saide, so great crie was heard in her tentes, so great dinne of the harnesse, and noise of the trompettes, that I could scarsly stand on my feete. And if my welbeloued hope had not the sooner holpen, heauinesse had led me bound with chaines to her region. Wherefore hope came shining with a certaine diuine brightnesse, and smiling, [Page] said: O souldier of Christ, what heart, what minde hast thou, in this battell? Which I hearing, forthwith was ashamed. And she saide, Feare thou not, this euill shall not take thee, thou shalt not perishe, loe, I am with thee to deliuer thee. Knowest thou not that it is written: The vnwise man saide in his heart, There is no God. This heauinesse hath spoken, like an enimie of thy soules health. Can she persuade thee, that there is no God, or that God hath not the prouidence of all thinges? Canst thou doubt of faith, which with so many argumentes [Page] and reasons hath confirmed it? I wonder that thou art so felled to the grounde at her wordes. Tell me (I pray thee) whether begannest thou to doubte in thy heart of faith? Then said I, The Lorde liueth, and my soule liueth. O my most sweete mother, I neuer felt the least pricke of infidelitie in my heart: for by the grace of Christ I beleeue no lesse those thinges to be true, which be apperteining to faith, than those thinges which I beholde with my bodilie eyes. But heauinesse so oppressed me, that I shoulde rather haue beene [Page] brought to desperation, than to infidelitie. Sonne (said she) thou knowest, that this is a great gift of God: For faith is the gifte of God, not of woorkes, that no man should glorie. Wherefore arise, and feare not, but rather knowe hereby, that the Lorde hath not forsaken thee, who although he hereth not forthwith, yet oughtest not thou to despaire, If he make tarriaunce, tarrie thou his leasure: for comming he will come, and will not linger. The Ploughman abideth most patiently the fruite and increase of his land in due time. [Page] Nature not foorthwith putteth on the forme, but first she prepareth the matter, and disposeth it by little and little, vntill she maketh it apt to receiue the shape of the thing which is to be created: yet knowe thou, that the Lord alwayes heareth him that prayeth deuoutly and meekely: for they neuer departe voyde from him. I will not labour to proue this with reasons, because thou feelest it in thy selfe. Tell me, who lifted vp thy heart to God? Who induced thee to pray? Who was it that made thee to sorowe for thy sinnes, and to weepe? Who gaue [Page] thee hope? Who made thee cherfull in thy prayer, and after thy prayer? What is he that daily confirmed thee in thy holy purpose? Hath not the Lorde God, which woorketh all in all, done this? If he then geueth thee continually these giftes, why doeth that cursed feend say, Where be thy praiers? Where be thy tears, with other words of blasphemie? Knowest thou not, that the heauenly Hierusalem differeth from this terrestriall tabernacle? Knowest thou not, that it is not conuenient, necessarie, or profitable, that God, or his Angels, shoulde [Page] descend visibly to men, & speake familiarly to them? First it is not conuenient: for how can light and darkenesse agree? Diuerse cities haue Citizens of contrarie and diuerse natures. Howbeit, to some (for their excellent holinesse, for that they be almost neere heauen their countrie) it was graunted to see Angels, and to speake with them: but this speciall priuiledge belongeth not to all. It is not necessarie: because that, sith God doth inuisibly gouerne vs, illuminate and comforte vs, it needeth not to shewe visible appearauncies: howbeit, our [Page] Lord is so good, that also visible signes (when he seeth good) are shewed: For what thing might he haue done for our saluation, and hath not done it? Finally, it is not profitable, for ouermuch familiaritie engendreth contempt: For to the Iewes, miracles both gret and many, nothing auailed. For rare thinges be royall and precious, according to the Prouerbe. Wherefore, let the inuisible visitation suffice thee, for the Lorde knoweth what thou hast neede of. Hath not he comforted thee? I knowe what thou thinkest in secreate in thine heart. [Page] Arise then and returne to prayer. Crie, aske, seeke, perseuere, For if he will not geue, because he is thy friend, yet for thy importunitie he will geue all that be necessarie. With these woordes comforted, I arose, and prostrate before God, I proceeded in my prayer, saying:
2 Bow downe thine eare vnto me, hasten thee to plucke me out.
O Lord my God, to thee I returne, hope hath sent me to thee: I come not by mine owne presumption, thy goodnesse prouoketh me, thy mercie draweth me. [Page] O how gratious and bountifull a receiuing is this? Surely, I ioy in my heart, and I desire none other consolation. Happie truly is this necessitie, which compelleth me to come vnto thee, which constraineth me to speake with thee, which forceth me to pray. Wherfore I speake to my God, though I be my selfe but dust, and ashes, bow to me thine eare. What saiest thou? Hath God eares? Thinkest thou that he is a bodie. No certeinly? For seeing the spirit is farre better than the bodie, who woulde say that God were a bodie, vnlesse he be [Page] madde? But stammaring (aswell as we may Lorde) we sowe celestiall seedes, and most high and holie thinges. We knowe thee, by thy creatures. We speake to thee, & of thee, by the similitudes of them. Thine eare, what is it Lord? Whether is it thy knowledge? For by the eares we vnderstande those thinges which be spoken vnto vs. Thou knowest frō the beginning all things, that men speake thinke & do. May we then vnderstand by thine eare thy knowledge? Truely thine eare doth insinuate & note somewhat vnto vs, which is not comprehended [Page] in the name of thy simple knowledge: for vnto some thou bowest thine eare, frō other some thou turnest it away: but thy knowledge alwayes abideth one and also the same. What other thing then is thine eare, but the notice and vnderstanding of thine allowance & disallowance? Thou dost bow thine eare, & hearest the words of good men, because they please thee, & thou allowest them: contrariwise, thou turnest away thine eare from the wordes of the wicked, because they will not depart frō their wickednesse: therefore their words please thee [Page] not, but thou disallowest them. What is then to incline thine eare to them which speake vnto thee, but to allowe their prayers, and to behold them with the countenaunce of pitie and mercie: to enlighten and kindle them, that with a sure trust & a feruent loue, they may pray vnto thee? For thou wilt geue them that they ask humbly. If a King sheweth to a poore man, whiche coueteth to speake with him, a courteous and cheerefull countenaunce, and turneth his eyes vnto him, shewing himselfe redie to heare the poore mans cause: will not the poore [Page] man be glad? Doth not the amiable looke and the attentifnesse of the King cause the poore man the more boldely to declare his sute, and minister vtterance and eloquence vnto him? Yes vndoubtedly. So likewise (O Lorde) we perceiue thee then to bow downe thine eare to our prayers, when thou grauntest vs in our prayers to be feruent in spirit. I beseeche thee therefore (O most mercifull Lord and Father) bow downe to me thine eare, allowe (I beseeche thee) my prayer, enlighten me, kindle me, and teache me, what thinges I ought to aske & desire [Page] of thee: illuminate & lifte vp my heart, that at last also thou maist heare my prayer. Hast thee (O most mercifull Lorde) to plucke me out, shorten my dayes, cut off my time. So bow downe to me (O Lorde) thine eare, that I may quickly be heard: for vnto thee, which dwellest for euer in eternitie, euer liuest, and alwayes continuest, no time seemeth short. For eternitie comprehendeth all, and exceedeth all times: but vnto mee (O mercifull Lorde) euerie day is long. For time is a numbering of the mouing so, that he which feeleth no motion, feeleth [Page] no time: but he that feeleth mouing, feeleth time: and he most of all feeleth mouing, which numbereth the partes thereof. I therefore, which number the dayes, and the houres, doe most of all feele the time: and therefore like as vnto thee, a thousand yeeres are but as yesterday that is past: so vnto mee, one day is a thousande yeares, whiche are to come. Wherefore, hasten thee (Lorde) to plucke mee out from sinne and aduersitie. For death hasteneth, and in euerie place awayteth for mee. [Page] Hie thee (Lorde,) least I perchaunce being preuented, haue no space to embrace repentaunce. Plucke me out (Lorde) from the hand of the malicious, deliuer me from the bondes of sinne, take me from the snare of death, leade me out of the depth of hell, saue me from oppression, and the harde bondage of heauinesse, that my minde may be raised vp, and reioyce in thee, & that I may praise thee all the dayes of my life. I thanke thee (Lorde) in Iesu my Sauiour: for according to the multitude of the sorowes in my heart, thy comfortes haue reioyced [Page] my soule. Therfore I will alwayes trust in thee, & I will (for my part) ascribe all to the praise of thy name. Lorde bow downe thine eare vnto me, hast thee to plucke me out. Alas wretch that I am: loe, yet againe heauinesse commeth armed with terrible harnesse and weapons. The banner of iustice goeth before her, an innumerable hoast followeth her, and eche hath a speare in hande. I beholde on euerie side vesselles of death. Woe is me, I am vndone. With an high and horrible voyce she crieth, saying: O wretch thy hope hath deceiued thee. Loe, [Page] thou hast laboured in vaine: for thou saidst, Bow thy eare to me, hasten to plucke me out. Whether hath God bowed his eare vnto thee? Where is thy prayer herd? Where is thy deliuerance? Where is thy comforte? Hath God hastened to plucke thee out? Nay, yet art thou in bondes, as a prisoner, thy case is nothing altered. If thou beleeuest faith to be true, why doest thou onely nourishe hope? Knowest thou not that God is iust? Knowest thou not his iustice? He spared not his Angels: he pittied them not, but for one onely sinne, he [Page] cast them into condemnation euerlasting. Adam sinned, and the iustice of GOD punished all mankinde with deathe. Thinkest thou that GOD doth not aswell loue iustice, as mercie? Children departing in originall sinne, deserue neuer to see the face of GOD: so rigorous is the iustice of God, that for the sinne, which they did not commit, but receiued by Nature, they shall bee punished: Gods iustice deliuereth the sinner to tormentes past recouerie: for in Hell there is no redemption,
Knowest thou not, that God spareth not the offender? Did he not destroy, in the time of Noe, almost all mankinde? Did he not consume with fire Sodom, & the other cities adioyning vnto it? Gods iustice hath bene so rigorous, that no compassion hath bene taken of infantes and innocentes? Howe ofte punished he the Iewes for their offences? Was not Hierusalem vtterly destroyed by the handes of Nabuchodonosor? Neither spared he his owne temple: for it was also destroyed of Titus the Emperour of Rome, where the Iewes [Page] were so cruelly punished, that there is no man that heareth of it, but quaketh for feare. But see how sharpe the iustice of God is, The children of the fathers are punished, euen to this day. Beholde, the Iewes be slaues, runnagates, and captiues in euerie place, & dying in their blindnesse, are punished with euerlasting paines. Thinkest thou the mercie of God is greter than his iustice? Truely in God it is neither greater nor lesser: for what soeuer is in God, is in his substaunce. But let vs consider the workes of iustice, and mercie, and [Page] we shall euidently espie, that the workes of iustice doe exceede the workes of mercie. God himselfe is witnesse, saying: Many be called, but fewe chosen. Mark how many Infidels be damned, howe many euill Christians there be, howe fewe liue within the compasse of a cleere & vncorrupt conscience: and thou shalt perceiue anon, that there be many more vessels of iustice, than of mercie. The elect are of mercie, the reprobate of iustice. Let not Marie Magdalene, nor the Theefe, nor Peter, nor Paule, make thee confident and trustfull: for there was [Page] but one Marie, one Theefe, one Peter, one Paule. Thinkest thou to be accounted amongst so fewe, which hast committed so many, and so great sinnes, whiche hast bene a slaunder to the Churche, which hast offended Heauen and Earth? Loe, thy eyes haue wept, thine heart hath sorrowed, & thou hast sought mercy, but as yet thou hast obtained none. The prayers of them that loued thee, were they heard? No: And why so? Surely, because thou art reputed among the vesselles of wrathe. Thy hope hath made thee to labour in vaine. Followe my counsell. [Page] Heauen hath cast thee vp, the Earth receiueth thee not. Who can suffer this great confusion? Better it is to die, than to liue. Choose death, which if no man will bring & offer vnto thee, then lay violent handes vpon thy selfe.
These wordes, with wonderfull importunitie, she laid on, and all the hoast with lowd voyces did rehearse the same, saying: Death onely is thy refuge. But I hearing this, was sore afraide, and soudenly fell downe vpon my face, crying out, and saying: Lord helpe me, Lorde forsake me not: come, come, come my hope. Loe, [Page] soudenly hope came glistering downe from Heauen, she touched my side, she lifted me vp, and she set me on my feete, saying: How long yet wilte thou be a babe? How long wilt thou be a Nouice and a young souldier? So oft hast thou bene in battell, and hast walked in the midst of the darkenesse of death, and hast not yet learned to fight? Be thou not dismayed at the great iustice of God, but rather comforted. Let them feare which be not conuerted to the Lord, which walke in their owne wayes, which followe vanities, whiche knowe not the way of [Page] peace. Let the wicked tremble, which doe greeuously sinne, and say, What haue I done? which be flintie hearted, which be called and refuse to come: they knowe not God, neither will they vnderstande the rule whereby to liue well: let these people feare. What saith the Apostle? It is a dreadfull thing to fall into the handes of the liuing GOD. Surely, such offenders doeth the iustice of God punishe, such are subiect to his malediction and curse. But sinners, which returning to them selues, doe rise againe, and runne to the father of [Page] mercies, saying: Father, I haue sinned against Heauen, and against thee: yet notwithstanding, be mercifull vnto me a sinner: let such haue trust in the Lorde. For he that hath drawen them, vndoubtedly will receiue them, and iustifie them. Let heauinesse bring foorth (if she can) but one sinner, were he neuer so great, which conuerted & turned to the lord, who was not receiued & iustified. For though it be said of Esau, that He found no place of repētance, though he sought it with teares: yet this maketh not against vs: for Esau did not [Page] weepe for his sinnes that he had committed, but for his temporall goodes which he had lost, because they were past all hope of recouerie. Neither thinke thou, that iustice doeth so perteine to the wicked, that it is cleane separated from mercie: and againe, that mercie doth so belong to the righteous, that it is cleane seuered from iustice: For all the wayes of the Lorde are mercie and trueth: For he sheweth mercie also to sinners, in geuing them, for the good deedes that they doe temporally, temporall rewardes: and specially in that he doeth not [Page] punishe them so much as they deserue. Likewise, his electe he pursueth with his iustice, in punishing them temporally for their sinnes, that they be not punished euerlastingly. Thou (therefore) suffer patiently the correction of the Lorde. Thou hast sinned: repent, let remission of thy sinnes suffice thee by his grace. My sonne, despise not the correction of the Lorde, and disdaine not when thou art checked of him: for whom the Lorde loueth, him he chasteneth: and he scourgeth euerie childe that he receiueth. Continue then in affliction, [Page] God sheweth himselfe to thee, as vnto his sonne. And though there be fewe chosen children of God, in respect and comparison of reprobates and castawayes: yet there be innumerable that shalbe saued. There is not onely one Marie Magdalene, one Theefe, one Peter, one Paule: but innumerable haue followed their steppes, repented, and receiued of the Lorde many and great giftes of grace. Mercie is no lesse valiant in her workes, than iustice: for mercie geueth so many good thinges to righteous men, that her workes [Page] doe farre exceede the woorkes of iustice. Knowest thou not, that the earth is full of the mercie of God? What creature can glorie that he hath receiued any thing, which hath not proceeded from the mercie of God? And although thou hast greeuously offended God, yet his mercie is greater than all the sinnes of the worlde. Trouble not thy selfe for the multitude and greeuousnesse of thy sinnes. Hath not mercie nowe come running and mette thee? Hath not she taken thee vp, and kissed thee? Loe, thou diddest fall, and thou wast not hurte. [Page] Why, art not thou a fraile vessell, which if it fall, it must needes be brused, vnlesse some bodie put vnder his hand? Why then, when thou diddest fall, wast thou not hurt? Who did put vnder his hand to stay thee? Who, but the Lorde? This is a great signe that thou art elect: for the elect, when he falleth, shall not be brused: for the Lorde will put vnder his hand, and support him. Doth not the Apostle write? To them that loue God all things worke to good: in so much that, euen sinne it selfe woorketh to them good. Doeth not that chaunce [Page] worke to them good, whereby they be made both humbler and heedfuller? Doth not the Lorde receiue him, which is receiued, of humilitie. Thou hast loued the Lorde many yeares, for his loue thou hast laboured: after thou diddest lift vp thy heart, & walkedst in the vanitie of thy witte, the Lorde withdrewe his hande, and thou diddest fall, & into the depth of the Sea thou diddest descend: howbeit, the goodnesse of the Lorde foorthwith put vnder his hand, and thou wast not brused. Say then, I was driuen away, I was turned ouer, that I shoulde [Page] fall, yet the Lorde tooke me vp: but it hapned not so to the wicked nor to them whom God hath reiected. When they fall, they rise not againe, but euen with great shame they excuse their sinnes, so that they haue the boldnesse of an harlotte, and by that meanes they neither feare God nor man. Arise then, and be of a strong heart, be mightie and valiant, attend on the Lorde, and doe manfully: let thy heart be strengthened, & suffer the Lordes chastisement. Thou hast proued thine owne power, that it is of no force: then humble thy selfe vnder the [Page] puissant hand of God, and hencefoorth be more circumspect. Patience is necessarie to thee, prayer without ceassing is conuenient: embrace the one, refuse not the other, then the Lorde shall heare thee in due time. Arise, and set aside all sorow, kisse the feete of the Lord with meekenesse & lowlinesse, then shall he saue and deliuer thee. These wordes saide, she was taken vp into Heuen, leuing me substantially strengthened, & wonderfully comforted. Then I hauing my heart armed with the helmet of hope, confidently came before God my Sauiour, & prostrate, I said:
[Page]3 Be vnto me a good protector, and an house of refuge, that thou maist saue me.
For thou God art of all the greatest, and the strongest: thou the Redeemer, and Sauiour of all: thou the Protectour of the faithfull: to thee therefore I flee boldly. Hope hath brought me in hope, whom thou so derely louest, whom thou hast alwayes commended vnto vs, with her I haue not feared to come before thy face. I graunt I am vnworthie, but she drewe me: I feared to approche neere, because of my manifolde sinnes: but she encouraged [Page] me. Loe, she standeth before thee, she beareth witnesse. I speake to my Lorde, being my selfe fleshe, and a sinner: Hope taught me, and saide to me, that boldly I shoulde open my mouth. Sweete and gentle (saide she) is the Lorde, he will not driue thee away, he will not be angrie, he will gladly heare thy prayer, and will geue thee whatsoeuer thou desirest: I beleeued, and therefore I spake. But considering thy maiestie, I was greatly humbled, and I saide in my traunce, Euerie man is a lier. I will neuer more trust in man, but in thee [Page] onely. Thou only art faithfull in all thy wordes, & euery man is a lier. What shall I yeelde to thee (Lord) for all that thou hast geuen vnto me? The cuppe of saluation I will take, and magnifie thy name. For from henceforth I will liue, not vnto my selfe, but vnto thee, doing good for thy loues sake. I will suffer all euils, I will forgiue mine aduersarie, I will be reconciled to my neighbour, I will further all men, I will hinder no man. I will not doe this (Lorde) through mine owne might, but I will call on thy name. Lorde my vowes I [Page] will pay to all thy people, for in the sight of God, the death of his Saintes is precious. Be thou vnto me a good protectour, defende mee from mine enimies. Mine enimies are my sinnes, whiche prouoke thy iustice against me, I shall not be able to stande against them, if thou doest not protect me. Let thy mercie be my shielde (O Lorde,) and with the shielde of thy louing kindnesse crowne me: I haue nothing to offer vnto thee, wherewith I may aswage thy wrathe & quench thy furie: all that I bring with me, indite and accuse me. [Page] Wherfore I will offer vnto thee the memorie of thy sonnes death and passion. Be not displeased (Lord God,) but rather be vnto me a gratious protector, vnder thy winges defend me, with thy shoulders shadowe me, and vnder thy fethers let me lodge in safetie. What shall iustice doe to me? If thou keepest me vnder thy protection, she will holde her peace (Lord,) and put vp the sworde of her furie, she shalbe made meeke and gentle, seeing thy goodnesse, in the benefite of thy sonnes incarnation, beholding the wounds of thy passion, & considering the [Page] bloud of thy loue and charitie, she will depart from me and say: Be merrie (sonne,) thou hast founde meate, eate in peace, sleepe and rest together with me? Be therefore (Lorde) to me a good protectour, an house of refuge, that in the time of raine and storme, in the time of temptations, I may flee vnto thee: for in thee onely is my health. Be thou vnto me a house of refuge, open vnto me thy side pearced with the speare, that I may enter the breast of thy most tender loue, in which I may be safe from the feeblenesse of spirit, and from tempest. Hide me in thy [Page] tabernacle, in the day of euils protect me in a corner of thy Sanctuarie, let it be the house of my refuge, that thou maiest make me safe: for I can not be but safe in the house of thy refuge. For thou hast sette thy refuge most high: this place is well fensed, no enimie is there feared: woulde God I might alwayes abide in it: who dwelleth in it cannot be wounded. Wherefore, in all temptations, in all tribulations, in all necessities, open (Lord) vnto mee the house of thy refuge, spread abroade the bosome of thy tender loue, shewe foorth [Page] the bowelles of thy mercie, that thou maiest make mee safe. Let not the Tempter come thither, let not the slaunderer clime vp, let not that naughtie accuser of his brethren approche. I shalbe then sure, and without care: yea, alreadie mee thinke I am exceedingly well and quiet. I thanke thee (good Iesu,) that of thy bountifulnesse thou hast sent thy hope vnto mee, which hath raised me out of dust, and of dongue lifted me vp, & hath set me before thee, that thou shouldest be my God, my protector, and the house of my refuge: to the intent thou [Page] mightest saue me. My minde is troubled: loe, heauinesse is at hand, she commeth with the banner of iustice from yesterdayes conflict, she departeth not, but she is defended with other weapons: for this night she hath stolen away my warlike furniture, and with my armour she hath gyrded her souldiers. Wherefore, vnweaponed and weake what shall I doe? Loe, howe bitterly she crieth, with what assault she rusheth vpon me, what trust she hath of the victorie. Where (saith she,) is thy protector? Where is thy house of refuge? Where is thy [Page] health? Continuest thou still in thy vaine hope? Thy comfortes proceede but of imagination. Thou imaginest God to be mercifull, to be thy protector, and the house of thy refuge: and thinkest thou to clime vp to Heauen. Surely, thou art deluded & mocked of thy phantasie, and comforted with vaine hope. Thinkest thou thy selfe to be rapte and taken vp into the thirde Heauen? These are but dreames. Recount with thy selfe howe greeuous an offence is ingratitude. Doth not this drie vp the fountaine of mercie? Remember that Christ wept [Page] for the citie of Hierusalem, and tolde afore time the euilles that shoulde befall vnto it, saying: The dayes shall come vppon thee, and thine enimies shall besege thee, and compasse thee about, and driue thee into streightes, and beate thee downe to the grounde, and thy children that be in thee, and they shall not leaue in thee a stone vppon a stone. The cause of which so great vengeaunce he kept not close, but added, saying: Because thou knewest not the time of thy visitation. Loe, ingratitude deserueth not onely [Page] to be depriued of Gods benefites, but also greeuously to be punished. Doth not this belong to the soule? Doth not Hierusalem oftentimes in Scripture signifie the soule? which when it will not knowe the visitation of the Lord, is beseeged with diuels, and with sundrie temptations, wherewith it is afflicted, falleth downe to earthly thinges, is laid along, and no vertue nor good deede is left in it, which is not destroyed: for it is spoyled of all grace, and abideth broken and vnbuilded: she knoweth not the time of her owne visitation. [Page] Thou truely, thou (I say) art this citie, enriched of God with many and great benefites, and thou acknowledgedst it not, but wast vnkinde: he created thee to his owne likenesse: in the midst of his Churche, not among Infidels, he made thee to be borne: he did set thee in a flourishing citie, with the water of baptisme he sanctified thee, in a religious house he brought thee vp. But thou huntedst after thy lusts, in the vanitie of thy braine thou walkedst, thou rannest downe headlong into deepe sinnes: the Lorde called thee, and thou aunsweredst not: [Page] he oft aduertised thee, and thou regardedst not his counsell. Howe oft did he lighten thee? How oft did he turne thy hearte? Howe oft did he wake thee from sleepe? He inuited thee, and thou excusedst thy selfe: he plucked at thee, & thou diddest resist him: at last, his vnspeakable goodnesse ouercame thee. Thou diddest offend, & he visited thee: thou diddest fall, and he plucked thee vp: thou wast ignoraunt, and he taught thee: thou wast blinde, and he lightened thee: from the tumult of the worlde, & from the tempest of the sea: he brought thee to quietnesse, [Page] and to the port of religion, he gaue thee the lande of holy conuersation, he made thee his Priest, & he brought thee to the schole of his wisedome: yet notwithstanding, thou hast alwayes bene vnkinde, and negligently hast done the will of the Lorde, albeit thou knowest, it is written: Cursed is he that doth the woorke of the Lorde negligently. Moreouer, the goodnesse of God did not so leaue thee, but alwayes brought thee gently to better & better, and (which is most of all,) garnished thee with the knowlege of Scripture, the worde of the Gospell he [Page] put into thy mouthe, and did set thee in the middest of his people, as one of the great and famous men. Thou notwithstanding, taughtest other, & regardedst not thy selfe: other thou healedst, and thy selfe thou curedst not: thou liftedst vp thy heart in thy worship, and therefore thou hast lost thy wisdome in thy worship. Naught wast thou made, & naught shalt thou remaine. Knowest thou not that the seruant vnderstanding the will of his Lorde, & doing it not, shalbe beaten with many stripes? Doest thou not know that God resisteth the proude? [Page] How falledst thou Lucifer, which diddest spring vp in the morning, which woundedst the Gentiles, which saiedst in thy heart, I will clime vp to Heauen. But thou wast plucked downe to Hell, into the depth of the lake. Vnder thee lie mothes, and ouer thee lie wormes. Thinkest thou nowe to finde mercie, which hast offended many, which so oft called and admonished of God, wouldest not answere? Where were then the iustice of God? Where were then the equitie of iudgement? Mercie doth not alway followe sinners, she hath her bounds. Is it not writen: [Page] I haue called, but ye haue started away: I haue spread abroade my handes, and there was none that would looke vpon mee: ye haue despised my counsell, & neglected my corrections. I therefore in your decay will laugh, & iest when that thing that ye feared commeth vpon you. Loe now, mercie geueth not alwayes pardon to the sinner. Dost not thou consider the degrees of mercie to haue an end, whiche being adorned with so many benefites of God, diddest fall into the Sea: and garnished with so many graces, for thy [Page] pride and vaine glorie, becamest a slaunder to the world? Let not then vaine hope deceiue thee, whom thou followest: liue hencefoorth after thy lust and appetite. Wilt thou not be punished, both in this life, and in the life to come, with infernall paines? Choose then to dwell with them which leade their dayes in delight, and in the moment of an houre shall go downe to hell. Let not shame hold thee backe. Take the forehead of an harlotte, Let vs eate & drinke, for to morow we shall die. Thy wound is past hope, & thy sore is incurable. But [Page] I remembering the aduertisemences of my mother, thoughe I was somewhat deiect & broken in minde, yet to my power I pluckt vp my selfe, & stoode vpon my feete, lifting vp mine eyes to heauen, from whence I hoped for helpe: and loe, hope with a cherefull countenaunce, furnished with blissefull beames, descended from aboue, and saide, Who is that which vttereth sentences with vnlearned wordes, & hath apointed bounds to mercy which is infinite? Ah foole, thinkest thou to hold the maine Sea in thy hands? Hast thou not herd [Page] the Lord, saying: In what houre so euer the sinner bewaileth his sinnes, none of all his iniquities I will remember. What man is he that sinneth not? Who can say his heart is cleane? The Lordes prayer belongeth to all, in which all men are compelled to say: Forgeue vs our sinnes. Our Lorde taught his Apostles thus to pray. Doth not then this prayer belong to other? The Apostles receiued first the holy Ghost. And why taught he them this prayer, if they had no sinne? And if they had, who can glorie that he is no sinner? Heare the beloued [Page] Disciple of the Lorde, If we say (saith he) that we haue no sinne, we beguile our selues, and the trueth is not in vs. (And Saint Iames saith,) In many thinges we all offende: Wherefore, all haue sinned, & neede the mercie of God, yea, the holy men of God: for it is written, Seuen times a day falleth the iust man, and he shall rise againe. Wherefore, mercie hath no limites nor boundes: but so oft as the sinner lamenteth his sinnes, soo the obteineth mercie: neither makes it any matter, whether we speake of greate or little offences. Thou [Page] hast fallen: arise, and mercie shall take thee vp. Thou shrinckest: call, and mercie shall come vnto thee. Againe thou fallest, againe thou shrinckest, turne thee to the Lorde, and the bowels of his pitie shall open vnto thee. Thou fallest the thirde time, & the fourth: knocke, crie, and mercie will not forsake thee. As oft as thou sinnest, so oft rise againe, and mercie shall haue no end. Why doest thou vpbraide the benefites that man hath receiued, O thou wretched woman heauinesse? Did not Dauid the greate Prophet receiue many and great benefites, [Page] of whom the Lorde saide: I haue founde a man according to my heart: and yet he sinned, and that greeuously, as well in adulterie, as in murdering of a good and innocent person and yet the Lord ended not his mercie in him. What bringest thou in the sinne of pride? Did not Dauid lift vp his heart, and caused to number the people of Israel? For he gloried, as though he had beene a great King, and a mightie, in his owne strength, and puissance: and yet he was not reiected for this. And why? Because he did not hide his sinne? He did not boaste [Page] it, as Sodoma did: but he saide, I will confesse against my selfe my iustice to the Lord. Wherefore mercie hath no limittes nor boundes appointed her, thoughe wicked and damned persons doe set endes to themselues, that they may not passe beyond: for she commeth to them, but they driue her away. Wherefore it is written, Thy perdition O Israel is of thy self, of me only is thy helpe. Open thy mouth (saith mercie) and I will fill it: holde out thy bosome, and I will giue thee a good measure, heaped full, and flowing ouer. Continue in prayers, [Page] and weeping: for he that hath begonne to loue thee, and crowneth thee with daily benefites, and good graces, will not leaue thee: but will geue thee increase, and will perfourme in thee his worke. What naturall cause beginneth a worke, and leaueth in the mid way? The vertue of seede ceasseth not, vntill it hath brought the fruite to perfection and ripenesse. What birde leaueth her young, before they be able to rule themselues? Who doth this? What profit commeth vnto them of this? None truely, but onely labour. Loue then compelleth [Page] the naturall causes to bring their effectes to perfection. Goodnesse compelleth them, which they couet to powre out: for goodnes always stretcheth out it selfe. If then the creatures doe this, what shall the Creator doe? For he is the selfe loue, he is infinite goodnesse. Shall not he make perfect his worke? Heare the Lorde Iesus, It is my worke (saith he) to doe the will of him that sent me, that I should make perfect his worke. He then that beganne to loue thee, with his giftes and benefites to allure thee vnto him, to cleanse thee, and also [Page] to purge thee from sinne: without doubt he will make perfect his worke in thee. For these be the preparations to euerlasting life. Why therefore nowe when thou diddest fall, wast thou not brused? Was it not, because the Lorde did put vnder his hande? Why did he turne thy heart from sinne? Why did he prouoke thee to repentance? Why did he comforte thee? Was it not, because he woulde make thee cleaue and sticke vnto him, and to make thee worthie of his grace, and to bring thee to euerlasting life? These be not illusions and imaginations: [Page] but diuine inspirations. But be it, let them be imaginations. Are they not good? Doe they not come from the vertue of faith? Wherefore, sith they issue from God, vndoubtedly these imaginations are diuine illuminations. Reioyce therefore in these woordes. At these wordes my heart was so comforted, that for ioy I beganne to sing, saying: The Lorde is mine enlightening, and my health: whom shall I feare? The Lorde is the protectour of my life, of whom shall I be abashed? At the feete of the Lorde prostrate with weeping [Page] I saide: Lorde, thoughe a fielde be pitched against me, yet my heart shall not feare: for my fortitude and my refuge art thou, and for thy names sake thou shalt bring me out and nourishe me, &c.
The Conclusion.
This meditation, thus deuoutly begonne, the Authour fell sicke, as he was occupied in his godlie exercise: and departing [Page] out of this miserable life, no doubt to eternall blessednesse, lefte his worke vnperfourmed, whereof he hath geuen vs this comfortable enteraunce.
A Prayer vnto the Trinitie, that the seede of the holie Scripture may fructifie in our heartes, and that we may be founde faithfull hearers of the worde preached, and followe the same in life and conuersation.
O God the Father, O God the Sonne, O God the holie Ghost, most blessed, and vndiuided Trinitie, of all Christians to be honoured, praised, and glorified: cast vpon vs miserable sinners the eyes of mercie and compassion: behold vs in the bowels of loue and tendernesse: guide vs by the spirit of wisedome and vnderstanding: [Page] that all our cogitations and actions may be acceptable vnto thee, and nothing repugnant to the prescript rule of thy commandements. And for so much as it is the seede of thy Gospell, which flourishing and fructifying in vs, maketh vs amiable & louely in thy presence: We beseeche thee, that we may most reuerently enter into thy holie Church & Sanctuarie, there submit our selues before thy maiestie, acknowledge our manifold transgressions, craue pardon for the multitude of our misdeedes, desire the descension of thy sanctifying [Page] spirit into our heartes, that we may attentiuely heare what soeuer is preached vnto vs out of the worde of life, and followe the same in the whole course of our conuersation. And because the nature of thy Gospell is to woorke the regeneration of our old man, to circumcise our corrupt thoughtes, and to cleanse vs within from all filthinesse and sensualitie: We beseech thee (O gratious & glorious Trinitie,) that we may feele stirred vp in vs a certeine greedinesse to imbrace thy blessed Gospell, and to esteeme it (as it is) the treasure of a perfecte [Page] Christian. Graunt also vnto vs by nature damnable, the illumination of a perfect perceiuerance and vnderstanding minde: that we may with the eyes of faith & true beleefe, conceiue the mysteries of thy sacred Scripture: that what soeuer is there out spoken & pronounced vnto vs, may tend to our comfort, and to the increase of grace, which it hath power to minister. Vouchsafe also, O most blessed Trinitie, that although the deprauation of our fleshe is such, that spirituall things seeme yrksome and growe out of count, yet that we may bring that wanton [Page] Heifer in subiection, & bend the necke of the same vnder the yoke of obedience to thy holie will. O heare our prayers, we beseeche thee, and graunt our requestes, that we may continually thanke thee for thy goodnesse, and extoll thy maiestie for euermore. Amen.
Imprinted at London, at the three Cranes in the Vintree, by Thomas Dawson. 1578.