FANATIQUE QUERIES, Propos'd to the present ASSERTORS OF THE GOOD OLD CAƲSE.
LONDON, Printed for Praise-God-Barebones, the Rumps Leather-seller. ⟨March .2. 1659⟩
FANATIQUE QUERIES, Proposed to the present Assertors of the GOOD OLD CAƲSE.
- Query I.
WHether it be not unnatural for the Rump to Re-assume her old Excrements, and whether a Scotch Pill upon it may not cause an Apoplexie? - II.
Whether Haslerig, or the Devil, more inveterately hate Charles Stuart, since the one hath got a great part of his Lands, and the other is in possession of many of his Rebellious Subjects? - III.
Whether it be any wonder Prin stickles so boldly for the Family of the Stuarts, since he may do that for his Ears, which another dare not for his Life. - IV.
Whether it be not a Paradox in Providence, that the pulling down the City-Gates, should be an Introduction to the Triumph of Bells and Bonefires? and, [Page 2]to satisfie the scrupulosity of some Desperado's, whether the Bulls-head in Cheapside had not the greatest cause to Rejoyce? - V.
Whether Col. Berry, and Col. Hewson have not betaken themselves, the first to the crying of Smal-coal, and the second of Boots and Shooes, since they vanisht insensibly, with that Ignis fatuus, the Committee of Safety, and have dis-appeared ever since. - VI.
Whether Alderman Tichbourns Beard be not in danger of being Singed at the discharging of the Guns in the Tower? - VII.
Whether Ireton have not taken up his Lodging in the Tower, for fear of being surprised by the City? - VIII.
Whether the Quakers utter not the language of the Beast, since they speak at the Bull and Mouth? - IX.
Whether Tom Scot be not fitter for a Secretary of the Stews, than a Secretary of State? and whether it would not better sute with his Genius, to be Custos meretricum, than Custos Rotulorum? and whether Leadsom his man, be not fitter to serve him as a Pimp or Trapan, than Clark, Promooter, or Informer? - X.
Whether Praise-God-Barebones were not a Nickname, [Page 3]since his Petition is neither to the Praise of God, nor Honour of the King? - XI.
Whether Lamberts Switches be not all broken, since his Designes come to nothing? and whether his Lady be not the better Souldier by the vertue of Nolls Breeches? - XII.
Whether the Anabaptists did not intend to Carbonado the Rump, since they provided such a stock of long Knives? or whether their intentions were to rip up the Scarlet Whore, and slaughter the Beast? - XIII.
Whether the King of Sweden had not better have given Montelion a Gold Chain for telling truth, than Will. Lilly, for flattering him to his own Destruction? - XIV.
Whether Sir George Booth were more Fool or Knave? and whether Major General Overton may not make Hull a Bedlam? - XV.
Whether the Anabaptists, or Fift Monarchy-men be the better Common-wealths men, since the second are resolv'd against all governments, and the first are content with none? - XVI.
Whether a hundred of Cheese had not been a better price for Jeremy Ives his Horse then forty pound at the demolishing of St. Pulchers Church? -
[Page 4]XVII.
Whether Charles Needham did not rightly christen his Pamphlet the Politick Mercury, since he hath a dextrous faculty of creeping into the breech of every rising Power? - XVIII.
Whether Sir Henry Vain, ought not to be transpos'd Vaine Sir Henry; and whether he be so wise a man as the world takes him to be, since he was shit out of the Rump? - XIX.
Whether Henry Hills deserve not to be the States Printer, since, to flatter the times, and justify the Sale of Kings and Bishops Lands, he corrupted that text in his Bible, Magistrates—sent for the punishment of evil doers, and for the Land of them that do well, to the land of them that do well; and whether this be not a sufficient expiation for the crime of Polygamy? - XX.
Whether ever any Antimonarchical bawling Puritan continued constant to his principles; and whether it is not now become evident that their desire of innovation in Religion, and chang of Government proceeded more from a vertigo in their own heads than any fault in the Regiment of Church or State? - XXI.
Whether the Saints of our times do not in their practice pervert the order of that text of St. Paul, Godlinesse is great gain, into gain is great Godlinesse? -
[Page 5]XXII.
Whether all these Queries deserve not a Committee of Inspection, and Examination, to resolve them; and since we may Query long enough, before we can find any good, Whether it be not time to make an
END?
POST-SCRIPT.
Gentlemen,
THe times are indeed so tedious in their circulations and frenetique transactions, multiplying the miseries of the Nation, as the Quakers do vain circumlocutions, (still seeming as far from the pretended composure of our differences, and restoration of our liberty, as when they began) that a little to laugh at our own sorrow, seems the only moral means to renew our patience, and recompose our thoughts for more solid considerations of the remedy of our disease. In this, if we trouble the serious, the ingenuous will pardon it, and we promise Loyal Hearts, as a recompense, some Orthodox State-Queries, more worthy the perusal of the reserved.
Valete.