THe Reverend Matron after a tedious strugling with the unmannerly Fates, having broken through the bottom of the Meal-Tub, is become a more terrible Champion in the behalf of Roman-Catholicks than the most ac­complished of their Saints; or all the Sturdy Pil ars of their Church, since their Female-Prelate dropped her untimely Bastard in Procession to Angello. For cloaking her self in pretended Innocense, the Devils own Mantle, she ever since has carried an Olive-Branch in her Mouth, as a sure Pledg of her being at Peace, and wish­ing well to that Infernal Potentate; promising faithfully by her Motto, never more for to displease him, or neglect his grand Affair: but to use her utmost Interest conti­nually, to send good store of guest to his Tartarian Mansion, since he has been so kind as to instruct her how to guild over the blackest Crimes, and make them seem most plausably [...]air, thereby to deliude the Ignorant, and b [...] berea [...]ing them of their Wits; poss [...]ss them with a Catalogue of her Vertues and harmless Life (Honest I might have said) but 'tis no matter, that wee'l refer to Mr. Dangerfield, her late dear Intimate, though now ungrateful as she is, she will not own the kindnesses received, but falls foul upon him at a grievous Rate, because that he would do no more. But to the purpose, First let us begin with her Gim-Crack, and take a serious View of the fine Frontispiece that adorns the work, which stands just as the Antients were used to paint the Porch or entrance of Falshood, Fair and Beautiful, the better to delude or draw the ignorant to gaze upon, till all suspicion of the Evil lodged therein was Banished from their Minds, that so they might the boldlier enter.

First then the Mist [...]ry of the Meal-Tub that has defeated all this Mallice, and made so many Lyars is dedicated to all the lovers of undisguised Truth, which indeed is seldome or never cloathed, unless it be in a Roman Dress, or wrapped o're Head and Ears in the Relict of Equivocation, till it grew invisible, or in St. Francis Cool of Mental-Reservation. These indeed are things that often make her walk in Mists, who otherwise in her naked purity looks most decent and still Triumphs in her Innocence.

The next we are re [...]resented with, is th [...] Emblem of the sweet fac'd Gentlewoman, or rather ( [...]f she cou [...]d per [...]wade u [...] to it) her proper self transubstantiated into a Dove. But now the Disp [...]e is, whether it be [...] Turtl [...] Dove or not, for they are held the Chastest Birds Created, therefore most unseemly, for this place, if Mrs. Susan her own Servant swor [...] the Truth. But l [...] that pass [...]nce the Pope allows such Venial Sins, such petty [...]r [...]vi [...]l [...]a [...]l [...]s.

The next his Holinesses Cross, that heretofore was wont to fright the Devil from the Dead, on which the pretty innocent Tom-Pigion Pearches with an Olive-Branch in its Bill; not altogether unmindful of the usage late in Newgate, for about his left Leg a Rope is fastned, and to that an Anchor, resting on Romes seven Hills, as not remem­bring how fatal Primrose-Hill has been. Next five Litter-Cresses more, to the dear memory of the five Cross Adorers in the Sheep-Pens, between Westminster and Limus, with (I ne­ver Change) the same Inscription that the kind Matron sent to Dangerfield, during his Confinement, to give thereby to understand that she was no Proteus, but had rather be what she was than an Elephant; and round about thse pretty whimwhams, incerted this stolen Verse, that was written by the well-meaning Author to a better Intent. (Dat veniam corvus vexat censura Columbus) In English thus, The Guilty go free, and the Inno­cent are oppressed. But how the overweaning Female came to chuse this to strike her self so hard a Box on the Ear is not certain; or perhaps it is to be said, backwards, as the Friers and Moncks do their Mattins for Roasted Apples in a Winters Morning; or most likely, that her Father-Confessor stuft it in the better to ingratiate himself into her good Opinion; and so keep himself warm between the Sheets when the old Man is packed away to France: Thus far of the Frontispiece, or out-work, now let us enter in and see what fine Trumpery the Priest has pack'd together and fathered it under the Prote­ction of their she-Saint.

The first we meet with, is a long Apology of faithful Service good wishes and Pro­testation of Loyalty which like the Syrians Songs, or Crocadiles Tears is presented to allure and take the Ears and fancies of the unthinking Vulgar, when all Rational and sober persons know, that there is no such thing as Loyalty appertaining to the Popish Religion, that is, as Loyalty to any Protestant Prince: For the Church of Rome holds those most accursed, that will not to the utmost of their powers endeavour to Assassi­nate, Murther and Root out all that are opposite to their superstitions and Idolatries. [Page 3] Killing of Kings, being accounted by them, meritorious; and Massacries the only means to gain Heaven; and that they are to omit no opportunities to raise Rebellion against an Hretical Prinee; as they most erroniously call the best of Kings, if they can do it without prejudicing their own Cause or Interest.

The next thing to be observed is, after they have made their Apology to turn their stings against the first discovere [...]s of the Plot, thinking thereby to lessen and impair the credit of their Testimonies with incredible lyes, as of Dr. Oates his being robbed by Captain Bedlow, and that he not being content with that, but he must fall upon one of Romes bald pa [...]ed Priests and rob him of his Bread and Chese: And another of their Tribe of Eight pence; the former of these A [...]tions the Doctor utterly denys, and the latter how true, eve­ry one that hath but any spark of reason may judge: so shallow is their foolish Malice that it betrays it self. I [...] the next p [...]ace, the good Matron would have the World believe that she was wonderful Charitable, and that she almost star­ved her self, to relieve those she never saw before, or had the least concernment with; and then again, how that she went about a beging for them, but whither with a Bask t at her back or no is not certain, then stoping here she falls fowl upon Newgate her own long rented Mansion; swearing, That the Spanish Inqui­sition was got thither, and that they used worse wracks and tortures there, than Popish Spain did to the poor Indians, or by the Popes command were used in Flanders, Piedmont, Bohomia, Albegentia or Waldentia; nay our Marean Per­secutions were but slight to what was used against imprisoned Catholicks, for you must observe, that none but Catholicks suffer in Newgate, or any other place whatsoever; the horror of which so affrighted the Keeper that he run Mad, and had l [...]ke to run over her for haste: and that this person that was so tor [...]ured upon the wr [...]ck was Mr. Praunce, and that after he had been wracked he was able to caper with about forty pound of I [...]on about his legs, and how he being brought into the Lodg was heard by a grave Antiquated Catholick gentlewoman to protest, That he knew nothing of the Plot, and what he had said was all lies, and extorted from him which made them fall to work with him aga n; so th [...]t he bellowed out so loud you might have heard him, i [...] not to R [...]me, to the end of the Old Baily at least: and that not prevailing with him to tell lies of the Innocent Catholicks; he was tickled off the third time, and a Minister stood by to see him fairly tortured, and that being let loose again, he tore a hole in his bed [...]icking to hide himself from his unmerciful tormentor, where being found, rather than he would endure the fourth bout, was resolved to damn his Soul in swearing things he never knew against the harmless Ca­tholicks So grosl [...] do these kind of People endeavour to insinuate into the minds of their own bigots to lessen their barbarities by making, or at least, per­swading S [...]rangers that we act Cruelties beyond the Turkes, and that the Sla [...]es in Algiers live in Paradice to what the Persecuted Catholicks do in En­gland. When every one knows, that they devour the fat of the Land, and feed their Dogs with what a thousand better Christans then themselves would be glad of. In the next place to make Justice more odious, and to Affront his Majesties benigne mercy and goodness towa [...]ds his poor miserable Subjects con­demn'd at several times for their offences this Popish Romancer would make peo­ple believe, that his Majesties pleasure is not in the least observed therein, and that Captain Richards [...]n if he please to Hang them or Transport them will do it in defience of his Majesties gracious Pardon and that to extort Mony out of them he often goes to them telling them, That if they will raise such a sum of money, he will prevail with the Recorder to get them included in a general Pardon: [...]ut if they have not the mony, nor cannot raise it, they shall be surely Hang'd; and all this is devised only to stifle Romes cruelties by magnifying or relating what was never done or thought. Such a Collection of horrid ingines and instruments for Tortures are in this admirable piece incerted, that I believe [Page 4] the Span [...]sh S ips [...]ontained not when they came fraught with all the malice of Hell and Rome to murther a rightful Prince, and to destroy two Kingdoms: but these aspersions and scandals seeming too little, their gall swells higher, and to strike sure she pitches upon the right Honorable the Earl of Shaf [...]sbury, and by so doing betr [...]ys her Popish Spleen, first that his Lordship should by his Ser­vant tamper with one Stroud a Prisoner in Newgate condemned for Murther, offering last sums of Money, if he would Swear against the Catholicks right or wrong and not only by him, but by Mr. Stringar his Steward, and by one Ed­ward Sro [...]d an Attorney; who came often to Importune and solicit to declare against the Lords in the Tower and several other things he never knew, promi­sing in his Lordships name, that thereupon he should be saved, Pardoned and several parcels of Gold was offered, but he refused all saying, he would not for­swear himself for ten thousand Worlds: how this can be believed, by any that know his Lordship I leave the Reader to judge; for any one that consider? how he has ever dealt upright and to his Power maintained Truth and justice cannot imagine that his Lordship would go about to perswade a Murtherer either by himself of any from him to swear falsly against a person that had no ways iniured him nor the least suspition of grudge remaining; so that this is purely out of envy, to blast or rule out the good opinion of all true Protestants have worthily concei­ved of his Lordships high deserts, the which the Popes Chickens can never race out of true English Breasts, his Lordships Integrity and Zeal, being ever for the preservation of his Maiesty, and the protestant Religion: so that though the Scarlets beast himself who sits sweating on his Mountains, and fends Mid-Wives out to reap his Abo [...]tive Crop, should come himself to lay a blemish on his Candid Reputation his Infallibilityship will be laughed and hooted at by each Oyster Wench and [...]ink-Boy; for sure it is that all their adverse contriving to stifle this notorious Plot, have hitherto been so weak and silly, that their Cob-Web Vail, rather give suspition that there is more yet remaining, than has been dis­covered to the World, then any way extenuate or lessen, for were not people guilty, they would never put themselves unto such shifts to shake of or turn ano­ther way the thing that never was, nor offer Bribes, so large as has been sworn against them to corrupt Evidence if they were Innocent.

That Rome has layd many Plots against this Nation hereto­fore, I hope few or none are Ignorant? And why should Roman Catholicks be thought more concious and tender than hereto­fore, that Church holds its Supremacy by Tyranny not Law, is palpable, nay many of their Doctors, have themselves confes­sed the same, nay this suffices not, but our Wonderful witty thing of a Mid-Wife, or a priest got into her Belly, and so speak­ing through her; as the Devil through the Heathen Oracles, of old, has produced such a rout of Embrion Pupils or St. Omerians to make Shot against the Kings Evidence, that any one would think she had robbed half the Register Books in twenty Parishes to furnish them with Names, tis well she tells us she found most of them in several Goals, or else we should have doubted whe­ther she would have been forced to have gone as far as Rome, there to have culled the Monasteries and Abbys, for Pickled Rogues, ere she could have found any convenient for her turn, first against Captain Bedloe, she musters up a rout of despera­does, [Page 1] lying in Newgate and other Goals under Condemnation, as that to joyn him with Mr. Johnson the Earl of Shaftsbury's, man, as a party in endeavouring to bribe Strode, and to bring him over to unite his Evidence with his whether false or true, and that thereby he should be highly advanced, giving him thereupon several Guineys for incouragement, but if he refused he was to be hanged and not to have the benefit of his Pardon that was then granted him by his Majesty, his first work being to undermine Anderson and Kemish two Romish Priests, how this can agree is hard to be understood, for first it seems pretty odd that Bedloe being one of the Kings approved Evidence, and having given his Depositions not only before the King and Council, but also in the high Court of Parliament, would venture to un­bosome his thoughts to a notorious Murtherer, a fellow he had never seen before 'tis sure he would (if he had any Sence and Reason in him as all Nations is well satisfyed he had) have been more cautious what ever old Women fancy to themselves, or would have others to believe perhaps as many others did; no doubt this Strode to get some of the Catholick Coin might tell mother Midnight some such pleasing tale as knowing her great Zeal to bring the Plot to Bed, or perhaps she might Dream of some such thing lying alone poor Heart, but not contented her, having got her dear beloved Dangerfeild out of Prison, and pay­ed as she says five pounds for hi [...] discharge she is resolved to use him night and day, and at the vast expence of three pound ten shillings or thereabout, new riggs him and sends him as a Scout about the Town, intending by him to forge a new device and turn the Anti-Christian Plot upon the Presbyterians, furnished him with Coin diped in Holy-water, for the self same purpose to make him less suspicious ordering him to frequent Clubs and publick Meetings not only in London, but in W [...]stminster, and several other places; and to be very diligent to hear how affairs went, and to wr [...]te down what Discourse he heard about In­treagues of State in this particular the reverend Matron has broak the Cockatrices Egg, and let the Poisonous Serpent out; for what can be more plain then that her main end in this was only to learn Intelligence how people stood affected and to be fully sa­tisfied how they relished the proceedings of the Roman Catho­licks, by that to be better instructed how to Moddel their De­signs and lay the train where it might soonest take for what else would she perswade us that she should disburse so much monies, and keep a Man in continual Pay, to loiter up and down and do nothing but spend, 'tis true, she tells you if you will be­lieve her, it was to find out the Plot the Presbiterians had on [Page 2] Foot, out of a Zeal and Loyalty to discover them to his Maje­sty; but sure it was hard to find what never was, for by these sto­ries, each one with half an Eye may plainly see that no such thing was ever intended as she preambles out; that Dangerfield should bring her word, that he had made a Discovery of a Rising in the City, that was shortly to be, and that Mr. Godwin, and Mr. Alsop had made a great Gathering to maintain Forces pri­vately, and that many of the Old-Army-Officers were kept in Pay, and that Sir William Waller had quartered three hundred Horse in a Village near London, the which were to Head the Rabbel and bring them to seize on White-Hall. Now as to these particulars, can it be thought that any such Design can be on Foot, and neither his Majesty nor any of his Council should have the least notice of it? That none but she and Dan­gerfield should know of it, besides those that were concerned in it very 'tis strange! This was a thing that would have brought Jupiter into Gemini without her Star-Gazers consent; but had it been so, where was the Loyalty she shewed in a timely disco­very, to prevent the Danger? could hiding it in the Bottom of her Meal-Tub any ways keep it from breaking out? No, 'tis cer­tain, had not that Meal been sifted by Sir Williams Care, it had by this time turned to as many Infectious Plagues to have distra­cted the Nation, as ever Pandora's Box contai [...]e [...]. Yet farther, so great a Corrispondence held our Matron with several Runa­gado Spies, that nothing was done but, if she declares Truth, it was presently conveighed to her by her Familiars; who like the Penny-Posts went up and down to fetch and carry Letters fraught with all the Talk of Factious Coffe-Houses: so that she seems the only woman Living, by her own Talk, that minded the fu­ture State and welfare of the Government. For says she, some of the eminent men that kept Company with the Factious as she terms them, gave me to understand, that they had drawn For­ces into the City, during his Majesties Indisposition at Windser, with an intention, if his Majesty had died, to have subverted the Government, and that the Lord-Major and such Aldermen as would not Conform were to be made away, and that they were to have se [...]zed the Tower, Dover, Plymouth and Hull, and several other places of Strength; and that the Scotch were to have help­ed them in the Design; this is strange indeed, but if we consi­der the right way, perhaps it was intended, as she says, for at that time there was no Faction but the Popish, and that they de­signed no less, 'tis past all doubt, for as I had almost for [...]ot to in­cert, where She says, that the Loyal Party feared his Majesties Decease, but the Factious hoped it, then which, nothing is plain­er, [Page 3] fo [...] none can take the Popish Party for the Loyal Party, see­ing it has been their whole endeavour above these hundred years to destroy our Monarchs, and subvert the Government, there­fore in this she may speak mistically. And then again, that Sir William Waller and Collonel Mansel should offer Commissions to Disbanded Officers, and that they should enter into present pay, is as strange, considering not one of them Officers are now to be found in Eu [...]ope; no all the Popish Saints on this side Purga­tory, are not able to tell so much as the Name of one of them! Therefore we conclude, they are got into the World in the Moon, and that all the Conjurers in Westminster or Barbadoes, though they should pore upon her two-leav'd Alcharon even years together, could not cast a Figure to bring any of them [...]o light. Therefore my Friends I must tell you, 'tis a strange thing such a Company of men should be so suddenly blown away. But the next thing She seems to be angry with, is Sir Williams catch­ing her napping at Supper, which put her into such a Fright, as had almost made her breath her last at both ends; for She de­clares, and truely I suppose you may believe her, that She was quite out of Love with a Stone Doublet, though not with the Stones in the Breeches. Nay, a greater Bugbear than that stood in the way, which augmented that Fear, for She not long before had delivered Articles in Parliament against Captain Richardson, who was now to be her Guardian, in the behalf of the Prisoners, as She pretended; in which She rendered him more prodigious then a Cannibal, and would have the people believe he Eats no less, than half a douzen Prisoners each Morning for his Breakfast, but coming into his Custody, found him more favourable than she deserved, and has since requited him by publishing twen­ty notorious lies against him; she and Dangerfield had the hap­piness to see each other through the Window, and as she says it was the first time that e're She curst him for eating up her Bread and Cheese; a very uncharitable thing in a Woman that pretends so much. Here the Reverend Matron continued snar­ling at the Protestants (but had no power to bite them) for the space of 22 weeks, if her own Memorials say true, often Visited by her dear Acquaintance Mr. Dangerfield and Sir William Waller, whom she ill Requites for taking such peculiar Care to keep her out of the Carts way. During which time, having several times bravado'd the Coucil when she was brought upon her Examina­tions, and like a true Roman-Virago, kept Truth so deep at the Bottom, that it never durst fly in her Face. At last She recei­ved her Trial at the Kings-Bench-Bar in Westminster-Hall, where Face to Face She met her Friend the Captain, who was not as [Page 4] She incerts, observed to tremble, but often to smile upon her for Joy to see her so brisk and blithe; but in conclusion, for want of his good Word she scaped Scotfree: but afterwards proved very unkind to her Deliverers, as she confesses, by giving two slips for a Teaster, and leaving them in the lurch.