Mirth for Citizens. Or, A Comedy for the Country:[?] Shewing

A young Farmer his unfortunate marriage,
His wife is so churlish & currish in carriage
He married her for beauty, for's own delight
Now he repents it both day and night.
By physiognomy adviscth young men that at: Wenches-skip,
To be sure to look before that they leap,
To leap at a venture, & catch a fall,
Raising the forehead breaks horns and all.
Tune of, Ragged, torn, and true.
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HEy boys my Fathers dead,
and what used I to fear,
VVith gold and silver I am sped,
[...]nd have fifty pound a year:
Then why should I be single,
I will not lead the life;
My gold and silver doth gingle,
a wooing i'le go for a wife.
Sure thrice happy am I
if I obtain this Bride,
There's none can her come nigh
in all the whole world beside.
A dainty fine Lass I know
as ever England bred:
Her skin is as white as Snow
and her hair of a Crimson red:
She lives but in our Town,
she is vertuous, chaste, and wise,
If I win her my joys are crown'd
bes [...]des a matchless prize.
Sure thrice happy &c.
Ile get her Fathers good will,
and Mothers too beside;
Then next i'le-try my skill
to win this lovely Bride:
I'le hug her and buss her and kiss her;
in her lies all my pride:
As Conventicle Dick served his sister,
and tother thing too beside.
Sure thrice happy &c.
She hath two hundred pound to her portion
and I a great deal of Land:
Thus shall I come quick to promotion,
for love I take her by the hand:
But when I went to be married,
I was in the height of my pride;
Brave gallants on horseback was carried,
to accompany me and my Bride.
Sure thrice happy am I
that I have obtained this Bride,
There's none can to her come nigh
in all the whole world beside.
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O we had a gallant brave wedding indéed,
and delicate dishes store,
Those were welcome which were of our (biding,
but little we minded the poor:
O we had both Sack and Canary,
and the Musick bravely did play,
O then I drank Sack and Sherry,
I thought it would never be day:
Sure thrice happy &c.
When I and my Bride was in bed
on my wedding-day at night,
My fancies with pleasures she fed,
for I had my full delight:
She shewed me Venus School
and with me she did daddle,
But I a young puny fool,
did quickly fall out of the saddle.
Sure thrice happy &c.
But then on the morrow morn,
O she laughed me to scorn:
O she drank sack and canary in Silver,
and made me drink out of a horn,
But when our wedding did cease
and our brave banquets were done,
My joys did quickly decrease,
and my sorrows soon after begun,
sure thrice happy &c.
She told me she would be Master,
and all the whole houshold guide,
I told her it gave disaster,
she said it should quickly be try'd:
Then against her I took stick,
thinking she durst not come nigh,
VVith a cudgel my bones she did lick,
that for pardon I quickly did cry:
sure thrice happy &c.
She's grown so devilish curst,
and in it she takes a pride,
Makes nothing my head to burst
and hang my bones beside:
She makes me go to Plough,
ditch, hedge, and thrash beside,
And Jack come serve the Jow,
to this slavery i'm ty'd.
sure thrice happy &c.
I do get up in a morn,
and for her make a fire,
i'm a Cuckold and laught to scorn,
a holly-Crab pays my hire:
Then her clothes she gets on her,
Sugar-sops must ready be,
And I forsooth wait on her,
with bowing on my Knee:
Sure thrice happy &c.
At dinner she is stout,
that by her I must now stand,
To wait with a Napkin on my arm,
and a Trencher in my hand:
Some desire I may them pledge,
and she is full of hate,
If I kiss not my hand and make a leg,
she lays me over the pate:
Another thing troubles my head
and grieves me worse than this,
VVhen her Comrade is with her in bed
I must reach her the pot to piss:
I must draw her a cup of long tipple
if it be a cold Frosty night,
Or she beats me as same as a Cripple,
O the Bulls pizel doth me fright.
Sure thrice happy &c.
She kicks me about the house
and puts me in bodily fears,
I dare not say dun is the Mouse,
she pinches me through the ears.
She makes horns at me & doth slight me,
and makes me a Jackanokes,
She kicks me, she pricks me and bites me
O I feel her devilish strokes.
Sure thrice happy &c.
I wish young-men hereafter
be not too quick in wooing their wives,
And beware of red-hair disaster,
or repent it all days of their lives:
Chuse a wench of a dark brown hair,
and one of a middle size,
Cole black will fill thee with care,
and ledge others betwixt her thighs.
Sure thrice happy am I
if I obtain this Bride,
There's none can her come nigh
in all the whole World beside.

The pretty by-names this young woman hath for her Husband. A simple Simon, a Tom Nickols, Jack Adams, a Muddy-brain'd Cuckold, a Hopping Dick, a Nicknindigo the Devils Turnspit. Here follows his potion of Dyet for several days of the week, of a Monday, is he riseth not betimes in the morning, instead of posset she comes up with a Holly Crab, and pays him about in his Shirt; on Tuesdays she bangs his back with a good Cudgel; on Wednesdays she kicks his breech, and lugs his Ears, instead of feeding him with Beef and Souce; on Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays, she pays his back with a Bulls pizle, till he cries, O good Wife, I will never do so no more.

Printed for P. Brocksby at the Golden Ball in Py-corner

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