ONe Bernardinus of Siena, who for his merits was after canonized and ſainted, was a great Preacher in Milan, where he preached with a great throng and concourſe of people, reprehending uſually the corrupt cuſtomes of thoſe times: This a Merchant of Milan obſerving, came often to viſit him, and earneſtly preſſed him, that without reſpect of perſons He would preach againſt that abominable ſin of Ʋſury, which was of late grown ſo common in that City. In the mean time Bernardinus. ſearching into the condition and life of the man, findes that he was the greateſt Uſurer in all Milan, and that he did this to affright others from that vice, and to ingroſſe all the dealings by Uſury to himſelfe alone▪

A rich Merchant of Venice, who had great trading in Naples, ſeeing one Iaſpar of Ravenna to come to Church every morning betimes, and ſhowing their great devotion, either praying or reading his Roſary and Davids Pſalter, he fell in love with the man ſo farre, as that he intruſted in his hands a good ſumme of money to traffique with, and to ſhare with him in the adventure. The time coming that Jaſpar was to give up his accounts of the money and the advantage; He not only denied that ever he received any money from him, but ſaid alſo that he never knew the Merchant. The Merchant being after blamed by ſome of his brethren for truſting a ſtranger without witneſſe or aſſurance, ſaid to them, It was not Iaſpar of Ravenna, but his Prayer▪books and Pſalter, which have cheated me. Pii ad mercedem ſumus ad mercedem impii, & magis impii quo magis pii.

There being diſcourſe of a Merchant of great credit, yet a ſordid Miſer and covetous: One John de Medices burſt into theſe words, See the great mercy of God, That all men ſhould truſt him that doth not put his truſt in God: He truſts not God, who doth not truſt him without a pawne, until he have before him as much as he can deſire.

There is a Tale of an old Vſurer, that had nothing in his mouth, but It is good to be ſure; If his Servant went to receive Money, he would follow him, why? tis good to be ſure; Though he had lockt the door, he would riſe out of his bed to feel it faſt, for It is good to be ſure, If he had told his money never ſo often over, yet he will tell it again, O'tis good to be ſure. This man fals dangerouſly ſick, and his ſervant perceiving little hope of life ask'd him, Maſter, have you ſaid your Prayers, yes ſure, ſaid he, I think ſo, Nay but ſay them again Maſter, for it is good to be ſure: He bids the Servant open the Cheſt, and bring him all his gold in it, The Servant having opened it, cryes out, Maſter, the Devil is in the Cheſt, he layes his paw upon all the gold, and ſayes, It is all his, becauſe it was extracted out of the life-bloud of Widows, Orphans, and poor Wretches; Sayes he ſo, ſaith the Extortioner, Then bring me the gold, the Cheſt, the Devil, and all, It is good to be ſure: And hence it may be it is, that uſually wlcked men are ſaid to get the Devil and all. But let this paſſe for a Tale, in earneſt It is good to be ſure. And in Goods gotten by Sacriledge, Oppreſſion, Robbery, or bloud, did none of your Learned Counſel adviſe you of a flaw in your Leaſes of Conveyance to aſſure your ſelves, That you were to have and to hold, this and that, with all the appurtenances, and know you not that Gods Curſe upon them and you is a certain Appurtenance to all ill-gotten Goods? Conſider this all ye that forget God, It is good to be ſure.

Caſtrutius Governour of Luca, who is reported to be tyrannicall, being condemned by one of his Familiars for baniſhing and confiſcating the goods of one Luparus a rich man, who by all men had the repute of a wiſe good and faithfull Citizen, thus anſwered his Friend with a ſmile, It is not Luparus his goodneſſe or wiſedome, but his covetouſneſſe vetouſneſſe is puniſhed by me; He cannot be good that is covetous; As long as I knew not his vices, I reſpected him as my deareſt friend, but as ſoon as Luparus ſhewed me he lov'd his money more then me, it behoved me alſo to eſteem Luparus his money more then Luparus.

I have heard the like to what follows related of a Merchant, which it may be was but borrowed from that which is ſtoried of Sigiſmund the Emperour, who having received a great maſſe of gold out of Hungary, commanded it, becauſe the day was ſpent, to be carried into his bed-chamber: where he paſſed a great part of the night without ſleep, at laſt he gave command to call up diverſe of his Counſel and ſpecial Friends, who, wondring what was the buſineſſe at that unreaſonable time, were brought into his chamber, and there the Emperour ſhowing them the gold, Do you ſee. ſaith he, that Hangman that would not ſuffer me to take any ſleep all this night, do you carry it all away and divide it among your ſelves, which when they readily did, Now, ſaith he, you may depart, and I hope I ſhall take my reſt much the better. Anacreon alſo, when a Talent of gold was given him by Polycrates, did diſtribute it among others, ſaying, I hate the gift which keeps a man waking.

Charles Duke of Burgundy being ſlain in battell by the Swiſſers at Kant Anno 1476. had a Jewell of very great value, which being found about him was ſold by a Souldier to a Prieſt for a Crown in money, the Prieſt ſold it for two Crowns, afterwards it was ſold for ſeuen hundred Florens, then for twelve thouſand Duckets, and ſet into the Popes Triple Crown, where it is to be ſeen at this day, And there it is as much worth as it was ſold for at firſt. And Lewis the eleventh of France gave no reall value to theſe toys, when he wore in his hat inſtead of a Jewell a peece of guilded Lead.

There is a Story out of Strabo of a company of people that met at the Market place, where was one that played excellently upon the Harp, ſo that all crowded to hear him, as being raviſhed with the Muſick; but no ſooner did the Market-bell ring, but they were all gone, onely one ſtayed behinde that was thick of hearing, to whom the Harper ſaid, He was much beholding to him for honouring his muſick when others were gone at the ringing of the Market-bell. What the Market-bell, hath that rung? ſaid the deafiſh man, Nay then farewell, I muſt be gone too. Pleaſure muſt yeeld to Profit, and the beſt Muſick to the Market-bell.

If this offend any Merchant, I may gratifie him as much in ſhowing him an Art to remember any debt he hath forgotten, It is this; One of a weak memory had lent a Friend a Crown, and was much ttoubled that he had quite forgotten, and could not recall the Man or his Name; At laſt being ſo bold as to tell it to his Wife, he was adviſed by her to walk about; and whoſoever met him, and withall bid him Good day or thank'd him, he ſhould preſently anſwer, But I had rather have my Money: The man takes a womans Counſell, many meet him, and not underſtanding the myſtery of theſe words let him paſſe; At laſt his Debtor meets him, and being offended with this Speech, tels him, you might have asked for your own in ſome more handſome and civill way, but here it is, I have it ready for you. Whatſoever you recover this way, I cry halves.

I ſhall alſo diſcover to others a way to be wiſhed happy by Merchants while you live, and to be moſt miſſed of them when you dye, and this it is in ſhort, to run much in their debts.

A man much in debt had taken Sanctuary in a Monaſtery, where a Friend of his us'd to come and viſit him, and finding him full of thoughts he asked him, though he knew his caſe, why he was ſo ſad; You know, I think, ſaid he, how many thouſands I am in debt, neither will my Creditors yeeld to any compoſition, and the trouble of this hath ſo dejected me, that I think I ſhould never have enjoyed my ſelf, but that I happily met with a Book of Patience, which raiſed up my ſpirits, or elſe this ſadneſſe I think had killed me: why then, ſaith his friend, have you hopes of ſatisfying your Creditors? No, ſaid the other; Nay then, ſaith his Friend, in my oyinion, They ſhould have this Book of Patience to reade, who, whether they will or no, are forced to want what is owing them.

Report being made among a Company of Merchants of one greatly in debt that was dead: In good faith then, ſaith one of them, he hath carried 500 Duckats of mine into the other world; And, ſaith another, 200 of mine; And other of his Creditors there ſpake of other ſums; Whereupon one that was amongſt them ſaid; Well I ſee now, that though a man cannot carry any of his own with him into the other world, yet he may carry other mens. It is to be feared that the accounts he may.

A great Lady in Barbary, being a Widow, called to her an Engliſh Merchant trading in thoſe parts, with whom ſhe knew her Husband had ſome commerce, and asked him if there were nothing owing to him from her deceaſed Husband. He after much importunity and many modeſt refuſals, as having been greatly benefited by the dead Barbarian, acknowledged ſomething, and ſhewed her the particulars; She tendred him ſatisfaction, and forced him to take the uttermoſt penny, ſaying thus, I I would not have my Husbands ſoul to ſeek your ſoul in hell to pay his debts. Non dimittitur peccatum, uiſi reſtituatur ablatum, in Latimesrs old Engliſh, either Reſtitution or Hell.

There were ſome that came to King Alphonſus, who with great earneſt requeſted him in the behalf of a Gentleman, who being a man of pleaſure, did (as it ſeems) owe all but his ſoul to other men, for his Body was puniſhed in priſon; they deſiring that a Gentleman ſhould not ſuffer in his Perſon; The King flatly denied it, and told them, that ſuch men as had waſted ſo much Means and Goods (which are indeed means to do good) neither in the Service of King or Countrey, nor for the benefit of their Parents or Friends, but altogether for the pleaſure of their own bodies, ſhould in all reaſon ſuffer puniſhment in their bodies, Qui non habet in aere, luat in corpore, ſaith the Law.

A Florentine Merchant, in ſtead of the ſigne of diſtinction of his houſe and ſhop, cauſed to be painted a fire, and therein ſome books a burning; to the intent that if any came to buy of him without money, he might anſwer them, that there was no booking; for as they might ſee by the picture, his Books were burnt, and nothing could be had without ready money. Others of this Merchants reſolution in Italy have written on their Shop-doors this Item in great Letters, Hoggi non ſi dà a creta, dimanſi. Cras credo, hodie nihil. This day there is no▪truſting, but tomorrow there is. Cras credo, haud hodie ſic nego quotidie. I leave to the Merchant to judge whether truſting or not truſting be more advantagious; but the practice of that Merchant was pious, who had no Book for men of Eſtates, but for poor men he had, to lend them money or wares upon their own day; which if they paid they might borrow again.

A rich man, I doe not ſay a Merchant, was journeying to the waters for his health, having taken with him a companion for his recreation, A poor man begging on the way, with much adoe he drops him a penny, his companion grutcheth at it, and why (ſaith he) ſpend you the money we may have need of? O, ſaith the man, that he may pray for me, I ſhall come the ſooner to Heaven for this; Nay then, ſaid his companion why did not you give more? Do you think Heaven is to be got for a penny? methinks you are not ſo good a Merchant as I took you for, to lay out for a journey to theſe waters where you hope for health to live a while, and lay out no more for that place where you hope to live for ever; Heaven is little worth if it be worth no more then ſuch men give for it.

Thomas Gaine (Guadagni) a Merchant by his Name, and a rich Merchant of Florence, who lent to Francis the firſt of France five hundred thouſand Crowns, but as it ſeems by the ſtory, one of thoſe who (as the Italian Proverb is) live by their trading and cheating one half of the year, and by their cheating and trading the other half; This man was about to build an Hoſpitall at Leyden; And having purchaſed a fair plot of ground for it, he brought his acquaintance thither, and among them one Saltarell a Merchant likewiſe, and skillfull in Architecture, to whom he ſhewed the models and platforms, requiring his advice. I like all this well, ſaith Salterell, only one thing is faulty, there is too little a ſpace of ground, it will be much too narrow; Why, ſaith Gaine, do not you ſee what a large compaſſe there is? I ſee it is large, ſaith Salterell, but if all are to come hither, whom you have brought to poverty, it will not hold the one half of them.

One ſpeaking of theſe kinde of works, ſaid, that without reſtitution and compenſation to man they could not be acceptable with God, who hates robbery for a burnt-offering; and that theſe men were much like one, whom in the Countrey the people by a Nick-name called Gods Shoe-maker, who uſed to ſteal Leather, and (it may be touch'd in conſcience for it) he would give away the Shoes for Gods ſake. And it is now proverbiall, To ſteal the Hog, and give the feet for Almes.

Diverſe Proverbs of gain and bargaining, moſt of them Outlandiſh, wherein are good Counſels to thoſe that will take them.

1. A Merchant that gains not, loſeth.

2. He that gains well, and ſpends well, needs no count-book.

3. He that hath the ſpice, may ſeaſon as he pleaſe.

4. Weigh juſtly, and ſell dearly.

5. Love is not found in the Market.

6. Pleaſing ware is half ſold.

7. Were there no Fools, bad ware would not paſſe.

8 You muſt loſe a Fly, to catch a Trout.

9 The buyer needs an hundred eyes, the ſeller not one.

10 He that praiſeth would ſell, and he that blames would buy.

11 Whoſo knew what would be dear, ſhould be a Merchant but one year.

12 Ill ware is never cheap.

13 That is gold which is worth gold.

14 Money wants no followers, or Every one faſtens where there is gain.

15 Health without money is half an Ague.

16 Ready Money is a ready Medicine.

17 He that hath Money and Capers is furniſhed for Lent.

18 With a Floren, the Latine tongue, and a good Horſe, a man may travel any where.

19 To have Money is a fear, not to have it a grief.

20 Little wealth, little care.

21 He that hath Lands, hath quarrels.

22 Pains to get, fear to loſe, care to keep.

23 He that hath little is the leſſe dirty.

24 In a great River Fiſh are to be found, but take heed leſt thou be drowned.

25 Wealth is like Rheum, it fals on the weakeſt Parts.

26 When all men have what belongs to them, it cannot be much.

27 The Gown is his that wears it, and the world his that enjoys it.

28 All did come from others, and muſt go to others.

29 Riches are like Muck, ſpread abroad they are fruitful, but on an heap and hoarded they ſtink.

30 If a good man thrive, all thrive with him.

31 The bit that one eats makes no friend.

32 Preſents of love fear not to be ill taken of ſtrangers

33 He that pitties another remembers himſelf.

34 The Houſe is a fine Houſe, when good Folks are within.

35 Silks and Sattins put out the fire of the Chimney.

36 Pay tithes, and give almes, and be as rich as God would have thee.

Other good counſels to thoſe that need them, and to whom they belong.

a He that looks not before findes himſelf behinde.

b To buy dear is no bounty.

c He that loſeth his due gets no thanks.

d Shop-keepers are Courtiers. They that have wares to ſell have words at will.

e Buy at a Fair, but ſell at home.

f Buy not all you have uſe of, nor every thing you think you have need of.

g The dearer it is the cheaper for me (meant I ſhall ſave by not buying.)

h On a good bargain think twice, for a good bargain is a pick-purſe.

i A good payer is maſter of anothers purſe.

k A good pay-maſter ſtarts not at aſſurance.

l He that will be ſurety ſhall pay.

m Would you know what money is? go borrow ſome.

n He that would have a ſhort Lent, let him take money to be paid at Eaſter.

o Sins and debts are alwaies more then one takes them to be.

p He that gets out of debt, grows tich.

q He that knows what may be gained in a day, will neither ſteal, nor beg, nor borrow.

r He that hath no Trade, it is to his loſſe.

ſ He that hath a good Trade, hath a Purchaſe made.

t Little and often fils the purſe.

u Keep thy ſhop, and thy ſhop will keep thee.

w He that will make a door of gold, muſt drive in a nail every day.

x He that labours, and thrives, ſpins gold.

y He that lyes long in bed, his Eſtate feels it.

z The Citizen is at his buſineſſe before he riſe,

A Play, women, and wine kill a man laughing.

B Gameſters and Racers never laſt long.

C In Building and Gardening you are ſweetly undone,

D A fat Houſe-keeper makes lean Executors.

E To make a bounce, i. e, to ſpend a quarters Rent at a meals meat.

F He that burns his houſe warms himſelf for once.

G The Jews ſpend at Eaſter, the Moors at Marriages, and Chriſtians in Sutes.

H To gain teacheth how to ſpend.

I As the year is, your pot muſt ſeethe.

K Every one ſtretcheth his legs according to his Coverlet.

L Much ſpends the Traveller more then the Abider.

M Who hath more bread then needs muſt not keep a dog.

N Sleep without ſupping, and wake without owing.

O Mend your clothes, and you may hold out this year.

P Men get wealth, and women keep it.

Q Better ſpare to have of thine own, then ask of other men.

R A penny ſpar'd is twice got.

It is not to be reckoned, what publike and private benefit this Alphabet well learn'd may produce: but Democritus intending, howſoever recompenſed, to oblige the Merchant, will now diſcover him a ſecret how to recover a ſtolen treaſure, without going to the devil (to an Aſtrologer, I mean, or a Conjurer) it is this. A certain man had digged and hid under ground a good ſumme of money, to which none was privy but a Neighbour his intimate acquaintance; who proving falſe to him digg'd up by night and carried away this treaſure. The other ſeeing himſelf rob'd, and ſuſpecting him that was the theef indeed, comes to him without any ſhew of ſadneſſe, and tels him in a merry manner, that Fortune was every day more and more favourable to him, he had lately come in to him a thouſand Duckets more, which the next night he purpoſed to lay up with his fellows in the place he knew. His Neighbour gaping for the whole, as ſpeedily as may be carries back the money he had ſtolen, hoping within a day to ſweep away every duſt of that and the other ſumme alſo. But the Owner finding his money returned, carries it home with him, and deceives the Theef his Neighbour.

A Countreyman had brought into the Emperour Fredericks Court a Load of Corn, and being gone into his Inne one of his horſes was looſed out of the Cart, and taken away. The News coming to the Emperours ears he cals in the fellow, and asks him if he had heard any thing of his horſe, and tels him withall that he ſhould have looked to his Horſes, for it was a wonder there being ſo many Souldiers about him who had uſe of horſes, that his other horſe ſcaped, But the Countreyman telling him, that the other was a Mare, and unfit for ſervice in the Warre, the Emperour bid him then to get up upon his Mare, and ride about to the Stables in the City; which done, the Horſe ſmelt his Fellow which he had miſſed, and by his neighing betrayed himſelf and the man that had ſtolen him.

There is a ſtory of our Sir Thomas Moore, which is thought fit to be tranſplanted into other Languages; and it may be is not ſo commonly known at home; He ſitting in judgement upon ſome Theeves and Cutpurſes, there was one grave ancient man upon the Bench that ſaid, it was the careleſneſſe of men in keeping their purſes that gave occaſion to theſe new ſort of Theeves; Sir Thomas diſliking this Speech, and adjourning the Sentence till the next day, ſends for one of the Cutpurſes at night, inſtructing him what he would have done, and promiſing him liberty. The next day this man being examined and plainly proved guilty, He anſwered for himſelf, that if it pleaſed the Judge, or any that ſate there to hear him, He had a ſecret to reveal which concerned the good of them all, Sir Thomas bid him take his choice: Then ſaid the Cutpurſe, if it pleaſe that grave worſhipfull Gentleman, who ſpoke ſomething on our behalf yeſterday, I ſhall tell it to him, the Gentleman coming down to the Priſoner, he draws him aſide, and whiſpers ſome crochet in his ear, but withall dives into his pocket, and carries his Purſe; The Priſoner returning to the Bar, and giving Sr Thomas a ſigne that he had done the feat, the Gentleman being ſeated begins to beg and plead for the Cutpurſe, and that he would tell the Iudge what would deſerve his pardon: Well then, ſaith Sir Thomas, but we muſt help the poor man with a little money that he may live honeſtly hereafter; upon which motion every one drawing their purſe, the Gentleman miſſing his began to be wroth, and ſaid, that his Purſe was gone he knew not how, and which was moſt ſawcily done, ſtolen from a man of juſtice in a place of Juſtice: Sir Thomas returns him his own words he had uſed the day before, that it was his own negligence, &c. and the Court having good ſport, He wiſhed him hereafter not to blame thoſe that loſt their purſe, or in any way to beleeve or take upon him the defence of Cut-purſes.

A noted Merchant of Antw • rp ſpoke to a Painter to draw his Picture, promiſing him twelve crowns if he did it well and like him. The work being done, the Merchant repenting of his bargain, and loth to part with ſo much money for a Picture, quarrels with the Painter, that he had not done it artificially, and that it was nothing like him, and ſo would not pay him his Money. The Painter carries away the Table, and bethinks himſelf how to get the money out of him; He addes to the Merchants head, a colour'd Hood, Feathers and Bels, and in this Fools habit hangs him out at his ſhop for ſale. The Merchant who was well known, being taken notice of by all paſſengers in this dreſſe, to redeem himſelf from ſcorn and laughter, was forced to buy the picture at the price formerly agreed on, and to pay alſo for the Fools Cap which he had given him.

Philip Alexanders Father maintaining Argument with a Muſician in points of his Art ſomewhat peremptorily, the Muſician ſaid to him: God forbid Sir, your Fortune were ſo bad to know theſe things better then I, Aliud Sceptrum, aliud Plectrum, as another Muſician ſaid to King Ptolomy.

It was commonly ſaid of Nero, that would have had the repute of an excellent Muſician, that He was any thing rather then a Muſician, and yet he was a better Muſician then a Prince, for he would be either ſtretching the pins of government too high, or letting them down too low.

Diogenes call'd an ill Muſician Cock, Why Cock? (ſaith he) Becauſe ſaies Diogenes, when you crow men uſe to riſe.

A wandring Scholar, that feigned himſelf a Maſter of Arts, went a begging to a Smith, and pleaded that he was a Maſter of Arts; what Arts, ſaid the Smith, the ſeven liberall Arts, ſaid the other, Thoſe Arts, ſaid the Smith, methinks are not very liberall, which cannot maintain a ſingle man, and I with one Trade maintain my ſelf, wife, and children.

A Miller, of whom the old Proverb of England was, that every true one hath a golden thumb, and in Germany they ſay, when they ſpeak of a ſtour man, that he is as bold as a Millers ſhirt, that every morning▪ takes a theef by the neck; One of theſe going a begging, and deſiring a gathering for him, He that commended his caſe ſaid, Neighbours I pray you conſider this poor man; Whom I verily beleeve to be an honeſt man becauſe he begs, for otherwiſe he might have lived well by cheating and taking toll as other Millers do. Some may think this Story made by ſome Scholar in anſwer to the former, but Democritus aſſures him he hath it upon record; and that he is of that good opinion not only of Millers, but moſt Tradeſmen, that they may be honeſt when they go a begging.

Thoſe that cheat others by fair words, would think it ſomewhat ſevere to be ſerved as Alex. Severus the Emperout puniſhed a man that by fair promiſes had abuſed his Name to the people, he made him be tyed to a ſtake and choaked with ſmoak, with theſe words, He ſold ſmoak, and he is puniſhed with ſmoak; this your fairtongued Cheaters would think ſevere and harſh, and yet it is no more then they deſerve, but in conſcience they cannot ſay but Gallienus the Emperors puniſhment was reaſonable, who condemned a Fellow to the Sands for ſelling glaſſe inſtead of jewels; and when in the Theatre all the people ſtood looking for ſome Lion or wilde Beaſt to come forth to devour him; there was at laſt ſent out a dunghill-Cock, and a Cryer, with theſe words, He cheated others, and himſelf is cheated.

Your Fellow-Traveller findes fault both in City and Countrey, and wiſheth they may finde the leaſt faults in him, but that both by doing better may make them paſſages to a better place. In the mean time he is demurring in which he ſhould ſettle, upon ſuch conſiderations as theſe.

Cardinall Hippolitus Nephew to Pope Clement the ſeventh, although of great Revenues, kept a bountiful houſe, and had a great many Followers; which the Pope being a niggardly man had often in vain reprehended in him, at laſt coming once to his houſe when the Cardinall was rid abroad, He called the Steward, and bid him bring him a Rowl of all his Attendants with their Offices, and being amazed at the great number, he takes a Pen and daſhes out as many as he thought uſeleſſe and unneceſſary; and giving back the Roll bids the Steward tell his Nephew that it was his will that he ſhould diſmiſſe all thoſe whom he had croſſed out, he might very well ſpare. Hippolitus coming home at night, the Steward delivers him the Roll with the Popes pleaſure, unto which the Cardinall preſently anſwers, It is true what my Lord ſaith, that I have no need of thoſe many ſervants whom he hath cancel'd, but ſince they have need of me, I charge you as yru reſpect my favour, not to put away any one of them.

Ariſtippus the luxurious Philoſopher, being taxed by one for giving ſix Crowns for a ſmall Fiſh; Why ſaith he, what would you have given? Some twelve-pence, ſaid the other, Well, ſaid Ariſtippus, And ſix Crowns are no more with me.

Plato once chiding his Ariſtippus for buying ſo many Fiſhes, Ariſtippus told him that he had them all for an half penny; It is true, ſaid Plato, and I could have bought them for ſo much; Why then, ſaid Ariſtippus, You ſee Plato, that I do not love Victuals any more then you love your Money. One Polyenus a Sophiſter, coming to the ſame Ariſtippus his houſe, and ſeeing a great Feaſt providing, began to reprehend the exceſſe; Ariſtippus took no notice of it at preſent, but a while after ſends to invite him, who comes and feeds, Now, ſaith Ariſtippus, why doſt thou blame the Feaſt thou art willing to partake of, I ſee thou doſt not diſtike dainty fare but the charges.

There was a Lady in our Weſtern parts who gave great entertainment to the Gentry thereabouts; She being a good Huſwife was up betimes, and call'd to one of her maids out of her window, Is the Piggy ſerv'd? which a Gentleman, whoſe lodging was near over-heard; And when the Lady came down in great State into the Great Chamber full of Company, that Gentleman begins, and Madam ſaith he, Is the Piggy ſerv'd? the Lady preſently makes anſwer, You know beſt whether you have had your break-faſt.

One us'd to ſay to his gueſts whom he invited, If you be temperate and reaſonable guests, here is enough for you; if not, here is too much: This would do well for him to think of, but it would do better for another to ſpeak it.

And it may be this was but borrowed from what was ſaid of Socrates, to whom one finding fault with the flender proviſion he had for his gueſts, Socrates made anſwer, If they be good gueſts they will take it well, but if they be bad, it is no matter how they take it.

Cyrus being asked by his Grandfather Astyages, Why he would drink no wine? anſwered, for fear leſt they give me poyſon, for, quoth he, I noted yeſterday in the Feaſt of your Birthday, that ſome body had poyſoned all the wine they drank, becauſe at the taking away of the Cloth, not one of all thoſe that were preſent at the Feaſt aroſe in his right minde.

Crates the Theban finding fault with the coſt and waſte at great Feaſts; others defended it, ſaying, this expence was made by ſuch as had plenty; Yea but, ſaith Crates, you do not excuſe a Cook if he put too much ſalt or pepper in your meats, and ſay, he hath plenty.

Diogenes paſſing by the houſe of a riotous perſon, on which he ſee a note of ſale, ſaid, I knew this, that ſometime or other thou wouldeſt ſpue out thy maſter.

An Italian Gentleman having ſold four Fields of ground to buy him an handſome Turkiſh Race-horſe, and riding him out one day, a Gentleman ſeeing him gallop, ſaith to his companion, O what a large ſtroak hath that Horſe, yes, ſaid the other, You would ſay ſo, if you knew all, for he hath leapt over four fields at one ſtride.

Another Italian Gallant coming into company all ſweaty, in a rich Damask Sute; Fie upon it, ſaies one, how does that Gentleman ſweat! and well he may, ſaid another, having an whole Vineyard upon his back; (which it is to be underſtood that he had ſold to put himſelf in brave clothes.)

One Johannes Gonzaga having ſtore of money to ſpare, which though it were his own already, he went to try whoſe it ſhould be, had loſt at dice bag after bag with much eaſe and pleaſure, for He that plays away his money muſt not value it. At which his Son (Alexander by name) ſtanding by look'd very ſadly. Upon which one of the company ſaid, Your Son here looks earneſtly when you will win, that he may have ſome ſhare with you. You are deceived, ſaith Gongaza; to think that Alexander hath any ſuch low thoughts; You know Alexander the Great wept, fearing his Father Philip would leave him nothing to win; and my Alexander on the other ſide, is ſad, fearing that I ſhall leave him nothing to loſe; this is called Alexanders example inverted, i. e. Alexander turned inſide out, turned out of all, but I do not like theſe ſad jeſts.

Theſe every one, I beleeve, can parallel with ſome Engliſh Story. M. Cambden tels us of a great Swaggerer, that having lately ſold a Mannor of an hundred Tenements came ruffling into the Court in a New Suit, ſaying, Am not I a mighty man, that bear an hundred houſes on my back? which one that heard, ſaid, he might have better employed it in paying his debts.

A great Gallanto-Flanto-Ranto▪ that had waſted much of his Patrimony, ſeeing one M. Dutton a rich Gentleman, but plain, in a Gown not of the neweſt cut, told him that he thought it had been his great Grandthers Gown, It is ſo (ſaid M. Dutton) and I have alſo my great Grandfathers Lands.

Sir Nicholas Bacon being keeper of the Seal, when Queen Elizabeth in progreſſe came to his houſe at Red▪ grave, and ſaid to him, My Lord, what a little houſe have you gotten, ſaid, Madam, my houſe is well, but it is you that have made me too great for my houſe.

Ferdinand King of Caſtile in his progreſſe turned into the houſe of one Alphonſus a famous man, it was a ſtately building, but had a narrow ſtair-caſe. The King ask'ed him, why he had not made larger ſtairs to ſo fair a houſe? Alphonſus anſwers, I never thought ſo great a Gueſt would have come into it.

Philip the ſecond King of Spain in his Journey was driven by a ſtorm into a Countreymans houſe, where he was forc'd to take up his lodging; the Husbandman ſet before him ſuch as he had, and was much troubled at the entertainment of ſo great a perſon: In the morning the King calling him to him gave him thanks, and bid him ask wherein he might gratifie him: The man anſwers, I pray God to preſerve your Majeſty in life and health, and grant that I may never ſee you here again.

Two Noblemen vying complements who ſhould firſt go in at a door▪ one of them who ſeem'd to be forced to go firſt in (as one muſt go in firſt) ſaid to the other, Sir, Now I think you under ſtand how carefull I am to be your ſervant, ſince I ſo readily obey you in this which puts a ſhame upon me.

A Stranger being invited to Supper, when he ſee Cheeſe the firſt diſh that came in to the Table, ſaid, But in our Countrey they do not bring in Cheeſe till the end of Supper; It is true, ſaid the other, and ſo they do with us.

Auguſtus Caeſar was invited to Supper by one of his old friends, where he had but ordinary entertainment; whereupon at his going he ſaid, I did not know that you and I were ſo familiar.

In Genua ſome Citizens ſtanding at their doors, asked a Countreyman paſſing by for ſports ſake, what time of the year Countreymen took moſt pleaſure in; In the Winter time, ſaid the Countreyman, for then we can ſit about the fire, roſting of turneps and cheſtnuts, and lie and ſleep moſt ſweetly by the Fire ſide, what do you think of this life? Truly ſaid one Citizen, You ſeem ſomewhat akin to the Hogs: Why, ſaid the Countreyman, What time of the Year do you of the City like beſt? What but the Spring, Fellow? ſaid the other, when all is freſh and green, when the flowers grow, and the Birds ſing; Then ſaid the Countreyman, You are are ſome akin to our Aſſe, who at that time of the year never leaves braying.

Scipio canvaſing for Aedile, meeting one of the people, and taking him by the hand, feeling it hard and brawny, ask'd him in jeſt, Whether he went upon his hands or his feet? at which the Countreyman took ſuch offence that he went about to his companions, and told them how much Scipio ſcorned the people, which raiſed ſuch an indignation againſt him in the multitude, that Scipio loſt their ſuffrages and the office.

A Shepheard having ſpied an huge Toad gazed upon it, and fell a weeping. And being asked by a Cardinall riding that way why he wept? I Weep, ſaith he, to think, that I never yet have thanked God for his bleſſing in making me a man; and not ſuch an odious beaſt as this is; See, ſaith the Cardinall, how theſe Countreymen ſteal away heaven from us.

To this we may adde what M. Fuller▪ hath from report of a Gentleman travelling in a miſty morning, that ask'd a Shepheard, What Weather it would be? It will be, ſaid the Shepheard, what weather pleaſeth me, and being courteouſly requeſted to expreſſe his meaning; Sir, ſaith he, it ſhall be what Weather pleaſeth God, and what weather pleaſeth God pleaſeth me. This is the only ſure way to have our wils.

Pope Paul the third riding once out of Rome to take the air, met a Countreyman, who was an ancient proper man of a lively freſh colour, with a Beard down to the Girdle, in homely but comely clothes, the Pope cals him to him, and ask'd him of his age and condition of life; The man ſaies, that he was above fourſcore and ten, that he was an husbandman, and lived upon a ſmall Farm he had, and that every day for buſineſs or the exerciſe of his body, he walked on foot a mile or two, that he had a Wife, and Children, Grand▪children, and great Grand-children, which made him ſtirre about for them. And being asked by what means he kept that ſtrength of Body at that Age, He anſwered, He had no changes of meat or clothes, he uſed no ſawces, and he drove away all care from his heart as much as he could. The Pope pleaſed with the man and his anſwer aſſign'd him a yearly penſion of an hundred Crownes, that he might ſpend the reſt of his time the more cheerfully. He thanks the Pope in theſe words, I deny not, Holy Father, but that I owe you moſt humble thanks for your great Bounty; yet I know that this will rather take away from the years of my life, then adde any thing to them.

Stories of long lived Countreymen in our Countrey are needleſſe; for as the ſame Authour obſerves, in England there is ſcarce a Village with any ſtore of people, where there is not to be found ſome one man or woman of fourſcore, And not long ſince in Herefordſhire there was a Morricedance by eight men, whoſe age reckoned together made up eight hundred years compleat, ſome having over and above what the other wanted of an hundred.

Two Citizens being rid abroad in the Spring, by chance they heard the Cuckow ſinging: Now it is known who are noted by that Birds name, where a poor injur'd man muſt ſuffer more alſo by the ſcorns of fooliſh wantons; The Citizens hearing this Bird, began to laugh one upon another, and to ask, To which of them the Bird dies ſing? and from conteſting they fel • to contending, from jeſt to earneſt, and to a Sute of Law at laſt; where the Lawyers having tam'd their purſes ſufficiently, the Judge in the end pronounced this Sentence, that the Cuckow did ſing to neither the one nor the other of them, but to her ſelf only.

A certain Counteſſe of the City Coſence in Calabria, her Husband lately dead, being to certifie by letter the Corporation, who were her Subjects, of their new Tenure, ſubſcribed, The ſad and unhappy Widow, &c. They thinking to imitate her, and that they muſt give her her own Titles, direct their letter back, The Aldermen, Magiſtrates, and Governours, &c. To the ſad and unhappy Widow our Lady, &c. and in the beginning, Moſt illuſtrious and ſad Lady, &c. Theſe people, although they bred the famous Teleſius, yet why they were called Brutii, you may partly gueſſe by this ſtory.

Nic. Picinninus a great Souldier but a blunt man, meeting Antonius Panormitanus a famous Scholar, and intending to paſſe a Complement, thus beſpeaks him, May I not live Antony, if I do not wiſh my ſelf blinde as oft as I ſee you. Panormitan troubled at theſe words, ſayes, Why ſo my Lord, ſince there is none that does honour your valour and brave actions more than I? Picinninus ſmiling, and ſtraing to expreſſe himſelf moſt eloquently, Thus it is, ſaith he, As oft as I ſee you with ſo great ſtore of Learning, and then again conſider my ſelf with ſo great ſtore of little wit; I both hate my ſelf as contrary to you, and I alſo reverence you as a learned man.

A Woman, whoſe childe was a naturall Fool, was directed in waggery to a Gentleman in Florence, who had been diſtracted, ſhe comes to him, and ſaies, Sir, I was told that you were once out of your wits, and I have a childe that is now in that caſe; I pray you tell me how you were cured; The Gentleman perceiving the ſimplicity of the woman, ſaid, O good woman, do not go about to cure him, for I never had a merrier time in all my dayes then when I was mad.

A Fool being brought to Court, and commended to a German Prince, the Prince ask'd him whether he would live with him, No, ſaith the Fool, I will live with my Father: why wilt thou not live with me but with thy Father, ſaid the Prince; Why, ſaith he, my Father got a Fool of his own for himſelf, and do you get a Fool of your own as my Father did.

A certain Rope-dancer got a fall, at which all the ſtanders by fell a laughing, only one natural fool there began to cry; ſome asking him why he cry'd, becauſe (ſaith he) all men call me a Fool, and yet I ever kept the ground, and never went in the Ayre, or got a fall as that Fellow did. Democritus laughs to ſee ſome of his Readers ſo ſolemn as to be weary of theſe few fooleries, and others again to long as much for more of them, as the people did beg of Demades and Demoſthenes to end their merry tales. And this would not be the book it promiſeth unleſſe it did ſatisfie a little the latter ſort of Readers▪ therefore to proceed.

There is one who is ſomewhat a kin to our Democritus, who hath gathered to his hand the Priviledges of beggars. 1. They are Citizens of the whole world, Ʋbiquitarians, every houſe is theirs, they are never out of their way. 2. They can loſe nothing, and every day they are a gaining. 3. A Gift of theirs is more worth, and men give more for it then they do for any thing they can buy in the market. 4. No body ever begs of them, but they beg of every Paſſenger. 5. No man ſues any of them at Law, no Creditor troubles them; if they ſue any other, no Lawyer looks for fee of them, and their cauſe, Pauperis cauſa is a plea to be heard before any others. 6. No body envies them, no body ſlanders them, no body takes notice what they do or ſay. 7. They ſleep better in ſtraw then others on down-beds. 8. They fear neither Souldiers nor Robbers, nor Theeves. An hundred Souldiers cannot ſpoil a naked man, Cantabit vacuus. That which thou haſt not no man can take from thee: An earthen pot once broke can take no more harm. It is in vain for pilferers to think to finde that in their hovels at night which they themſelves cannot finde at day. 9. They are free from all Cuſtomes, Taxes, or Exciſes; and this they have by birthright, and by the Law of Nations, and they pay nothing for this freedome. 10. Moreover all Princes and great men, Citizens and rich men are tyed to pay tribute to them; and to provide for them before they provide for Horſes, Hawks or Hounds, Feaſts or fine clothes, and before they offer to fill the other bag. And laſtly, if there had been no ſweetneſſe in Poverty, ſure ſo many wiſe men of old had not made choice of it, ſo many Philoſophers had not beg'd, Fabritius had not preferred his Turneps before the Samnites gold, and Alexander Monarch of the world had not longed to change ſtates with Diogenes, whereas we do not reade that Diogenes deſired or cared to be Alexander.

Diogenes begging (as divers Philoſophers then uſed) did beg more of a Prodigall man then of the reſt there preſent; Whereupon one ſaid to him, See your baſeneſſe, that when you finde a liberall minde you will take moſt of; No (ſaid Diogenes) but I mean to beg of the reſt again.

We reade of a famous Rogue (Rogue à Rogator) in Auſtria, who having ſpent a fair Eſtate of his Fathers, and was turned Beggar, would ſay, that his Father had payd yearly fifty Crowns in tributes and taxes, and ſo much in ſervants wages, &c. all which trouble and charge he had eas'd him in, and made an end of; the ſame fellow would ſay, that he was not turned Beggar but Courtier, for men had rather ſee him without doors then within.

There is a famous ſtory of one, and ſome name his Countrey to be Spain, who being to be whipped through a Towne, walked with a grace very ſtately; whom one pitying and bidding him mend his pace to rid himſelf the ſooner out of his pain, my Gentleman took it ill, and ſaid, What is it to thee, Fellow, how I go? when thou art whipt thou mayeſt uſe what pace thou pleaſeſt, and let me now, I pray thee, uſe the pace which I think moſt becomes me.

One hearing Beggars earneſtly and importunately craving for Gods ſake, &c ſaid, Theſe men that thus begg or rather challenge in Gods Name do live by him whom I am afraid they ſeldom ſerve, for I have ſeen hundreds of them before Church-doors, and ſcarce one of them in ten years within the Church in the time of ſervice. The ſame perſon when he heard any of them ſinging or roaring, would ſay, I cannot tell how to pity this man for he is merrier then I; and when he heard others in a ſet tune and frame of fine words, he would ſay, this man is a workman at his trade, he hath no need of me.

When the Emperour Frederick the third was at the Diet at Norimberge, a Beggar comes to Court, and is earneſt to be let in, for he was the Emperours Brother, the Beggar being importunate, the News comes to the Emperour, who bids him be call'd in before him, and asks him whence he▪ came to be his Brother, the Beggar anſwers, from our firſt Father Adam; the Emperour bids one of his Followers give him a Sous; the bold Beggar comes on again, and ſayes, It doth not become you, Moſt Noble Emperour, who are ſo rich to give your Brother ſo poor a gift; Go thy way, ſaies the Emperour, and if every one of thy Brethren give thee as much, thou Wilt be richer then I am. The like Story is reported of another Beggar, who came to Albert Duke of Saxony, begging a Penny of him for kindred ſake: What kindred? ſaid the Duke, by Adam, ſaid the Beggar, the Father of us all: Get thee gone, ſaid the Duke, for if I ſhould give a Penny to every one of my kinſmen by Adam, it is not my Patrimony and Dukedome would ſerve to do it.

Among this rabble it were fit Democritus ſhould tell you ſomething of Cheaters, but he is afraid honeſt men would be angry with him to teach others how to cheat them; and the Cheaters would laugh at him to offer to teach them who may be his Maſters: they that live about Tyburn can tell you how the Cheater is cheated at laſt. Though there be more Cheaters in City and Countrey then thoſe that hang in your way, and it is known what he of old laugh'd at, to ſee the Great Theeves ſend the little ones to the Gallows, to ſee little theeves in iron Chains, and great theeves in gold chains.

Thirlby Biſhop of Ely being Embaſſadour at Rome in King Edward the ſixths dayes, one of his men having negligently laid his Livery Cloak in his Lodgings had loſt it, whereat the Biſhop chiding his careleſneſſe, the Servant anſwered, He never ſuſpected Theeves in ſo holy a place as Rome▪ Away Fool (quoth the Biſhop) when thou comeſt into a ſtrange place, think all men to be Theeves, yet take heed thou do not call them Theeves.

Sixtus V. Pope being born in a thatcht cottage, of mean Parents, in a poor village Montalte, would ſport himſelf with it, and ſay, that He was born of a moſt illuſtrious houſe, for the Sun in one moment did enlighten it in a thouſand chinks and crannies.

Fabius Grimanus being Provoſt of Padua under the ſtate of Venice, a Company of Students had ſet on a ragged ſtarveling poor Fellow, whom they hired for ten Crowns, that he ſhould meet the ſaid Provoſt as he came out of the Church, kiſſe his hand, and audibly challenge him for his brother. Grimanus not awhit daunted at this new greeting, courteouſly re-ſalutes the man, and conducts him into his Palace; where having examined and underſtood the whole contrivance of the buſineſſe, he preſently commands the gates of the City to be ſhut, and call'd before him all thoſe Students who had an hand in this project. When they appeared, he tels them with a calm countenance, that by their kindeneſſe and diligence this day he had found a Brother, but ſo needy and bare, that to ſet him forth as was becoming a Brother of his, there would be need of no little money: Wherefore he deſired them, as they had taken no ſmall pains in finding him out a Brother, ſo they would ſhow the like liberality in apparelling him, and every of them pay down a convenient ſumme of money towards it. They excuſe, beg and beſeech him, that he would pardon this fault, that it was done in jeſt, out of raſhneſſe of youth and wantonneſſe. But the Governour was earneſt, and told them his Brother muſt have better clothes, and Money for Expences too: nor did he diſmiſſe them his cuſtody, till every one had laid down an hundred Crowns apeece for this new naked brother whom they had begot for him.

One Benedictus Albizius a Nobleman and a Scholar came to one newly made Cardinall, to give his old Friend joy of his new honour. But the Catdinall looking ſtrangely on him as if he knew him not: Albizius ſpeaks thus to him; You Cardinals, I ſee, are to be condoled rather then congratulated; for as if by gaining a Dignity you had loſt your ſenſes, you can neither ſee nor hear; you cannot diſcern your friends face nor voice; and it is well ſince you acknowledge not them if you know your ſelves. The Lord Verulam reports the like of a Gentleman in Italy, that wrote to a great Friend of his advanced to be a Cardinall, That he was very glad of his advancement for the Cardinals own ſake, but he was ſorry that himſelf had loſt ſo good a friend.

A Spaniſh Embaſſadour coming to ſee that ſo much cry'd up Treaſury at S. Marks in Venice, fell a groping at the bottom of the Cheſts and Trunks; And being asked why he did ſo? He anſwered, In this among other things my Maſters Treaſure differs from yours, in that His hath no bottome, as I finde yours to have, alluding to the Mines in Mexico, Peru, and other parts of the Weſtern Indies. This may hold in the compariſon of Eſtates in Lands and Moneys, Fundus non habet fundum.

A Fable of Aeſop ſhall cloſe this Period of our Travels: The Bat, the Bramble, and the Cormorant, were reſolv'd to turn Merchants, and to be Partners in the ſame adventure; The Bats ſtock was ready money which he had borrowed: the Brambles was wool and cloth which he had catch'd from ſheeps backs in paſſing by) and the Cormorants was a Treaſure of a wrack which he had found as he was fiſhing by the ſhore. Having put in their lading, they ſet to Sea. But a ſtorm ariſing, their ſhip ſunk, and their goods were all loſt▪ and themſelves only eſcaped to land; Now ever ſince the Bat fearing creditors, keeps cloſe all day, and walks only ſome few ſhort turns at night; And the Bramble is catching at every paſſenger to get ſome more cloth; and the Cormorant follows the Seaſhores fiſhing for his living and watching what the Sea will caſt up. The Morall of this Fable you muſt not look for out of your boyes books, for they that affixed thoſe Morals have ſeldome reached the wit of Eſop. Eraſmus thinks this Fable fathered on Aeſop and unworthy of him, but Eraſmus did not ſo well look into it; Democritus who is an acquaintance of Aeſop▪ and knows much of his minde, thinks the Fable his own legitimate and that Aeſop here points at three ſorts of men who get their living three ſeverall waies, and they ſeldom thrive or grow rich; The firſt is, of ſuch as live by borrowing, and purchaſe by Uſe money, and theſe commonly run ſo much in debt that they are forced to turn Bats, and dare not ſhew their heads. Others with the Cormorant gape for wracks, loſing what may fall, and live upon hopes, and feed upon ſhoares, and places vacant▪ deſart, and forſaken by others, where they fiſh for their living by new inventions and fancies; and of this ſort are Aſtrologers, Fortune-tellers, Chymiſts, Mountebanks, Projectors, and Cheaters of many ſorts. The third and worſt ſort of men who are figured by the Bramble, are thoſe that live by ſnatching, as Theeves, Robbers, Pirates, mercenary Souldiers, quarrelſome Sollicitors, Informers, and all ſeditious perſons, who ſit upon other mens skirts, and are ready to rent and tear all they meet. And all theſe, as is noted in the Fable, keep their old courſes, and are ſeldom reclaim'd to a better kinde of life, the debtor runs on borrowing till he run himſelf out of all; the Projector, &c. never leaves his Fancies till he be a Beggar: Nor the theef, &c. will ever ceaſe ſtealing till the Gallows makes an end of him: And the goods of all theſe are well ſet down in the Fable to be loſt and caſt away; for Money borrowed or found, or ſtolen, as it is quickly gotten, ſo it is quickly gone, and nothing but what is gained by honeſt care and pains hath a bleſſing to be laſting.

LAwyers and Phyſicians muſt here have the firſt place, becauſe they live when moſt other Scholars go a begging; and they are amphibia, they get their living in City or Countrey, at home or abroad; though one ſaith, it is a bad ſigne of a bad place to live in, where there are either many Lawyers or many Phyſicians.

An Advocate pleading for his Deſendant, beſpeaks the Judge with a Preface, that he might have his Lordſhips leave to pleade in the behalf of that good man, the Judge aſſenting, Now my Lord, ſaid the Lawyer, you muſt in juſtice acquit this man, whom you have allowed to be a good man; the Judge replied, It is true, a good man he is, and ſhall be for me, unleſſe the proofs againſt him make it evident that he is guilty. Quod non improbatur, praſumitur.

A Priſoner indited for Felony was asked by the Iudge what he had to ſay for himſelf, Truly My Lord, ſayes he, I did mean no hurt to the man from whom I ſtole, only it was an ill cuſtome that I had gotten, Why then, ſayes the Iudge, if it be thy cuſtome to ſteal, it is my cuſtome to hang up Theeves.

There were two came before Ariſtides, the Accuſer ſaid, O Aristides, this man did you ſuch an injury at ſuch a time, thinking by this ſuggeſtion to have made him partiall. Aristides replies, Friend, I ſit not here to hear what he hath done againſt me, but what he hath done against thee: This was Aristides the Iuſt, and Exuit perſonam Judicis, qui amici vel Hostis induit.

In Flanders a Flemmiſh Tiler falling from the top of an Houſe kill'd a Spaniard paſſing by, though himſelf eſcap'd alive by the breach of the fall. Some of the Spaniards kindred proſecutes this Tiler very hard for his life, urging Lex Talionis, the Iudge anſwered, that ſince he did urge that law, he ſhould have it,; He ſhould go up to the top of the houſe, and thence fall down upon the Tiler. Praeſtare culpam homo debet, non oaſum.

One Petrus Niger travelling thorow a Countrey village, a Dogge comes out of a Houſe, and runs at him fiercely; but he having a picked ſtaffe in his hand runs the Dogge through and kils him. The Owner of the Dogge draws the man before a Iuſtice, and he chides the man for being ſo cruell; And why (ſaid he) must you uſe the iron end of the staffe, and not rather have beaten him with the fore-end, Becauſe, ſaid the man, the Dog ran at me with his teeth, and not with his tayle.

Cicero had occaſion to call in Claudius Popilius an ignorant Lawyer for a witneſſe, He coming in, ſaid, He knew nothing, Cicero replyes, I pray you think not that I am asking you in point of Law.

Sir Thomas Moore had ſent him by a Suitor in Chancery two ſilver Flaggons, when they were preſented by the Gentlemans Servant; He ſaid to one of his men, Have him to the Cellar, and let him have of my beſt Wine: And turning to the Servant he ſaid, Friend, tell thy Maſter, if he like it, let him not spare it. And when his Lady at another time offered him a great Bribe in the behalf of a Suppliant, he turned away with theſe words, Gentle Eve, I will none of your Apple. Rejecit alto dona nocentium vultu.

Marcus Curio had a bribe ſent him to tempt him to be unfaithfull to his Countrey, the Meſſenger that brought the reward of iniquity found him at dinner with a diſh of Turneps, and proffered him the Money, but he refuſed it, ſaying, Let this be proffered to thoſe that cannot be content to dine with Turnips as I do.

Alexander ſent to Phocion a great ſumme of money, Phocion ſaid to the Meſſenger, Why doth the King ſend to me? the Meſſenger anſwered, Becauſe he takes you to be a good man: Phocyon replies, If he think ſo, pray let him ſuffer me to be good ſtill.

Alphonſus Pazzius (perhaps only nick-nam'd ſo from his ſimplicity) a Nobleman of Florence had a Suit at Law, where his adverſary brawling with him, ſaid, that it was a ſigne he was not well in his wits, ſince his Father had appointed twelve Guardians over him, Alphonſus anſwers, My Father knew that he who hath Lands hath quarrels, but if he had known that I ſhould have had to do with thee, he would have given me four and twenty Guardians.

Gerſon tels of an ancient Matron who came to Orleance, and going to ſee one of their Innes of Court, asked what was the buſineſſe of thoſe Students there? One anſwered, they ſtudied Law to be able to pleade in the Countrey; Alas, ſaid the woma • what a Countrey will there be when all theſe are let looſe, for in our Covntrey we have but one Atturney, and 〈◊〉 ſets us all by the ears together. One was ſaying, that the number of Lawyers would marre the Trade; O no, ſaid M. Heywood, for ever the more ſpaniels in the fields▪ the more game. Lawyers, if they do not finde quarrels, can make them.

There was a Phyſician commended to a Prince for a rare man; The Prince in ſport ſaid to him, I entertain no Phyſician, vnleſſe he have firſt killed thirty men. The Phyſician perceiving it was ſpoke merrily anſwered, And I am not far from that number. for I have already buried nine and twenty. Nay then, ſaid the Prince, you are not for me, for I am afraid I must be the thirtieth man; The ſayings are common, Non est bonus Medicus, niſi qui impleverit coemiterium, and Res miſera Medicus, cvi nunquam bene est, nifimale ſit quamplurimis.

The former ſtory may be feigned, but in hiſtory it is recorded concerning one Reuda (or Reuder or Reuther) a Scotch King, who would never ſuffer any young Phyſcian to begin their practice in his own Kingdom, nor admit them at home till after twenty years experience in his enemies countreys.

Heraclitus being ſick examined his Phyſician concerning the cauſe of his ſickneſſe; but finding that he was ignorant and did faulter, he would take none of his Phyſick ſaying, If he be not able to ſhew me the cauſe, he is leſſe able to take away the cauſe of my diſeaſe▪

There is a grave Authour that writes jeſts of Scholars (but ſuch as were bred in Gotam College) He brings in a Scholar meeting his Phyſician and ſaying to him, I pray Sir pardon me; and be not angry that I have not been ſick of late. Democritus thinks not this, as the Authour ſeems to deliver it, to be ſpoken ſimply, but with an eye to that ſaying, Medicus eſt nullus, ſi bene circumſpicias, qui amicos ſuos bene valere cupit. And Pauſanias had ſome ſuch like conſideration, who when his Phyſician met him and ſaid, I am glad to ſee you in good health, Pauſanias anſwered, That comes to paſſe, becauſe I have made no uſe of you; Now to theſe Democritus hath a ready anſwer in behalf of his Friends the Phyſicians.

And ſo where Democritus findes in another (who for the tryall of his wit writes againſt Learning with a great deal of learning) an objection againſt Phyſicians, that in the Countrey there is health where there are no Phyſicians, but in Cities where are moſt Phyſicians there are moſt ſick: Democritus thinks his words miſ-placed, and that he ſhould ſay, In the Countrey where there is health, there are no Phyſicians, but in Cities where there are moſt ſick, there are moſt Phyſicians, which will be no diſparagement, that they live moſt where they are moſt uſefull and needfull.

Aeneas Sylvius (who was after Pope Pius) being near his death, and the Phyſicians giving him hopes of life and recovery, ſaid, This is the miſery of great perſons, that even in death they do not want Flatterers. But to this there is an Anſwer framed, that they who are to be the means of life love not to be the Meſſengers of Death.

One Baccius a Phyſician in Florence, who was able enough, but he had a worm in his pate, was ſent for to the curing of a Woman; where feeling her Pulſe, and looking upon her, he asked her, How old ſhe was; She told him, Threeſcore and three, at which ſpeech he flung aſide her arm, and gat him gone ſaying, Why how long would you live in this world? Perhaps the Climactericall year, which is another crotchet, was in his head.

Cardan tels of one that had ſuch a Receipt as would ſuddenly and certainly diſſolve the ſtone in the bladder; and he concludes of him, that he makes no doubt but that he is now in hell, becauſe he never reveal'd it to any one before he dyed; A hard Phyſician and an hard ſentence; But this is preſſed home by Philaretus, and it is to be wiſhed that as there is the charitable Apothecary, ſo there were alſo the charitable Phyſician, for known diſeaſes; for moſt of them, not only the Ague are Medicorum opprobria.

It is a great Queſtion what does the cure, the Vulgar will tell you the laſt thing they took did the cure, as the laſt thing they did cauſed the diſeaſe; Some Phyſician will aſcribe it to the rarity and dearneſſe, others to the variety and compoſition, others to the fitneſſe and order, &c. others think it is not the Phyſick or Phyſician, but Nature being disburthened returns to her functions by degrees, and men from weakneſſe to a more cheerfull condition, from a long hunger to a more greedy appetite, &c. And ſome adde, that it is not Nature but the God of Nature which heals us, and as the Proverb is, God heals, and the Phyſician hath the thanks. It is Gods compaſſion on the poor man who contemneth no means but is without any. It is the reward of his patience▪ It is Gods ſeeing his tears, or hearing his or the Churches prayers for him, It is Gods reſpect to the ſick mans devotion, and good uſe he makes of his ſickneſſe whereby he recovers more health both in body and ſoul: This it is, though unobſerved, that cures thouſands, without means, or with what means ſoever they have about them.

A Wizard fortetold William the Conquerour that he ſhould fafely arrive in England with his whole Army, without any loſſe; which coming to paſſe (as the one or the other of two muſt be true) the King ſent to confer with this Wizard. But when it was found and told him, that he was drowned in that Ship, which only of all the whole Fleet miſcarried, the Conquerour▪ ſaid, He would never make account of that Science which profited more the ignorant than the Maſters of the profeſſion, for he could foreſee my good fortune but not his own miſhap.

Another Story we have of our Henry the ſeventh who asked one of theſe Star-gazers (who had before propheſied of his death, as Culpepper did of the now King of France, who lives to piſſe upon his grave) this Queſtion, What ſhall betide me this Chriſtmas? The cunning man anſwered, he could not tell; What then I pray thee ſhall become of thee? quoth the King, That likewiſe he ſaid, he could not tell; Well then, ſaid the King, I am more learned than thy ſelf, for I know that thou ſhalt be committed to priſon, and there keep thy Christmas for a jugling Companion.

Antonius Puccius, being in Embaſſage to Philip Duke of Millain, much given to Aſtrology, could not get audience a long time; At laſt, the Dukes Aſtrologer adviſing him of a fit time, the Embaſſadour was called upon to deliver his meſſage, who refuſed to come, ſaying, If the Horoſcope did favour the Duke at that time, it did not favour him.

In the time of the Councel at Conſtance, Peter de Monte Alcino a famous Aſtrologer propheſied, that Sigiſmund of Auſtria ſhould that year be crowned Emperour by the Pope, and that John the 23, Pope ſhould return with honour into Italy; But John being depoſed by the Fathers of that Councell, and Sigiſmund not coming into Italy that year, the Aſtrologer was upbraided by one for telling ſuch groſſe lyes, who anſwered, It was no wonder, that being to make judgement of two fools, he was miſtaken. The Aſtrologer was wiſe, for fools it may be will not be rul'd by the ſtars; nor perhaps wiſe men neither; for they ſay, Sapiens dominabitur Aſtris.

Henry the Second returning out of Ireland arriv'd at S. Davids in Wales, where it was told him, that according to Merlins prophecy, the Conqueror of Ireland returning that way ſhould dye upon a ſtone (called Lechlaver neer the Churchyard: whereupon in a great preſence he paſſed over it, and ſaid, Now who will hereafter credit that liar Merlin?

Two Women being fallen out and giving one another the lye, to do it (as they thought handſomely, the one ſaid, Thou lyest like our Town-Clock, which will be telling lyes upon Sundayes; And, ſaid the other, thou lyeſt like an Almanack-Maker, that lyes all the year, and every day in the year. Nay, Democritus is bold and addes, that an Aſtrologer lyes when he tells truth.

William The Conqueror invading this Land chanc'd at his arrival to be gravelled, and he fell, his feet ſticking faſt in the ſand. One of his Attendants caught him by the arme and helped him up, ſaying, Stand up my Liege-Lord, and be of good cheer, for now you have taken faſt footing in England. And then eſpying that He brought up ſand and earth in his hand, he added, Yea and you have taken livery and ſeiſin of the Countrey. It is as good to interpret an omen in the better as in the worſe part; and as Seneca (not a Stoick in this) ſpeaks very comfortably; Cum incerta ſint ſperanda ac timenda, tibi fave, & crede quod mavis.

That Omen or Luck is a word which ſignifies nothing, there are two noted inſtances from Heathens, where Fortune reign'd. An Owle (Infaelix Bubo, dirum mortalibus Omen) pitched upon Pyrrhus his ſpear as he went out to warre, and a tile thrown down upon his head piece by an old woman killed him. And an Owle lighted on Hierons ſpear when he went out to battel, and he got the victory. A Snake (O fearful!) came out of a wooden pillar, when Tarquinius Superbus was deſtroyed by Brutus: And a Snake (O good!) ſlipt out of the Altar, as Sylla was ſacrificing, and He (by the Augurs advice too) led forth his Army and overcame the Samnites, which victory was the foundation of his greatneſs. They ſay ſome Snakes have forked tongues, and this ſure was one of them.

My Lord Verulam in his collection of Apophthegmes relates this Engliſh ſtory of Sr. Edward Dyer a grave and wiſe Gentleman, who yet did much believe in one Kelley an Alchymiſt, that he did indeed the work and made gold. Inſomuch as he went himſelfe into Germany, where Kelly then was, to informe himſelf fully thereof: After his return, he dined with my Lord of Canterbury, where at that time was at the Table D. Brown the Phyſician. They fell in talk of Kelley, Sr. Edward Dyer turning to the Arch▪Biſhop ſaid; I doe aſſure your Grace, that what I ſhall tell you is truth, I am an eye-witneſs thereof, and if I had not ſeen it, I would not have believed it. I ſaw Maſter Kelly put off the baſe metal into the chrucible, and after it was ſet a little upon the fire, and a very ſmall quantity of the Medicine put in, and ſtirred with a ſtick of wood, it came forth in great proportion, perfect Gold, to the Touch, to the Hammer, to the Teſt. The Biſhop to this ſaid, You had need take heed what you ſay, Sr. Edward Dyer, for here is an infidel at the Board. Sir, Edward ſaid again pleaſantly, I would have lookt for an Infidel ſooner in any place than at your graces Table. What ſay you D. Browne? ſaith the Biſhop, D. Browne anſwered after a blunt manner, The Gentleman hath ſpoken enough for me. Why (ſaith the Arch-Biſhop) what hath he ſaid? Mary (ſaith D. Browne) he ſaid, he would not have beleeved it except he had ſeen it; And no more will I.

There are elſewhere to be found two or three words concerning Orators, which ſhould here have had their place. The next to them are Poets, and as my Lord of Eſſex asked Sir Henry Savill What he thought of Poets? that Learned Knight anſwered him, That he thought them the beſt Writers next to them that wrote Proſe. And ſome of them are good men too, ſuch as do not worſhip Hethen Gods, and ſacrifice their wits to Mars, Venus, or Bacchus, or idolize themſelves by Romances and Whimzes.

Miltiades, a famous Athenian Souldier, being asked, Whether it were more honour to be Achilles or Homer? anſwered, That was ſuch a queſtion as to ask, Whether it were more Honour to be a Commander or a Trumpetter.

One Andreas Maro, who, like our Kendall for his extemporary verfifying was famous, and got in Rome the name of Archipoeta, was invited by Leo the tenth, who himſelf was poeticall, where the Pope telling him he had heard of his great faculty and facility in verſe, He preſently in a glorying manner ſaid, Archipoeta facit verſus pro mille Poetis. To whom the Pope as ſuddenly replies, Et pro mille aliis Archipoeta bibit.

One Eobanus Heſſus a great Wit, and a good Poet, was once with a Nobleman Gualter by Name, He being to go abroad and ready to take Horſe, ſaid to the Poet, that he would give him a couple of Oxen, if he would make him a Verſe before he got into the Saddle, whereupon Eobanus came out readily with this Verſe, Aſcendat Gualter, veniat bos unus & alter. And the Nobleman after his return was a Nobleman ſtill, and as good as hi word.

A Muſician and a Poet met at a victualing houſe, where claiming kindred with a curſe upon that Courtier that ſaid they wanted brains, they muſt dine together, and beſpoke a Calves head, which was a dainty. The man provides them their dinner, but noting their diſcourſe, ſerv'd it in without the brains; Why what is here? ſaid one of them, It is, ſaid the Hoſt, a Muſician and a Poet; But he ſhould have brought it in, for if they wanted, they had the more need of brains.

In a meeting of ſeverall Poets, one was reckoning up the ſeverall ſorts of them, the Comici, Tragici, Epici, Elegiaci, Lyrici, &c. Stephanus Ferrarius ſaid, I wonder you have left out the moſt ordinary and most common ſort of Poets: Why ſaid the other, who are they? Ferrarius anſwers, the Famelici. Studium quid inutile tendis? To which purpoſe, ſure it is, that the Fable was made of the Gnats which in winter came a begging to the Bees, promiſing to teach their Children to ſing, but the Bees anſwered, that their Children had learned a Trade already which would keep them from begging or ſtarving in Winter: Poeſis vitae umbratilis & delicatae acceſſio, ſaid Tully, Poets, like gnats cannot live but in Sunny dayes.

But they will ſay, Other Scholars go a begging; They need not, if they will take Dionyſius his courſe, who being not ſuffered to govern men, got a command over children, or if at loweſt they will take the advice of the Propheticall Ballad made by a Vates indeed, if they will draw their Indenture, and be bound at adventure an Apprentice to a free School. But though Democritus doth not like begging, ſtudying to deſerve better, yet praeſtat pudere quàm pigere; and in caſes of neceſſity Scholars may not be denied that which is free for all men, for to appeal and to beg, is every ones priviledge.

One Mauritius born of mean parentage, and forced to get his living by Alms and Begging, followed his Book at School ſo diligently, that his School-fellows would in mockery call him Biſhop of Paris, which name he being noted by, when he begged, ſome would offer him liberally, upon condition he would promiſe never to be Biſhop of Paris; But he gallantly would refuſe every proffer upon thoſe terms: Which thing was generally laugh'd at, but in time it prov'd a preſage, for he was after advanc'd to be Biſhop of Paris indeed

Aeſchines perceiving every one give Socrates ſomething for a preſent, ſaid unto him, Becauſe I have nothing elſe to give, I will give thee my ſelf. Do ſo, ſaid Socrates, and I will give thee back again to thy ſelf better then when I received thee.

Antigonus ſeeing Cleanthes a Learned Philoſopher helping a Baker to grinde corn at the Mill, ſaid unto him, Molis tu Cleanthe? What Cleanthes doſt thou grinde Corn? I, ſayes he, I do ſo, or elſe I muſt ſtarve for want of bread. And many there are who are forc'd to ſerve Tables, their own Table, who are fitter for better ſervice. And perhaps Democritus is Mendicus hodiernus, and, though he could write ſomething elſe, writes this firſt, to put meat in his mouth.

For all this Democritus loves not to goe a begging; with him Verecundum eſt rogo dicere. Yet He loves and thinks a Scholars part Saepe rogare. For old Democritus hath told him, that Veritas eſt in puteis & fodinis, and he knows then, that it is the curious and inquiſitive man that muſt digge and draw it out of the deep. He is therefore 〈 in non-Latin alphabet 〉 , one of the Seekers, for He hath found by experience that Quaeſtio (quaeſitio) res eſt quaestu • ſa; qui quaerit & non quaeſita invenit. He that asks of others that are able to informe him, & diſcit, & placet; He that asks▪ and ſeeks of himſelf finds very often more than he ſeeks for. Beſides, Dulcior cibus ex venatu, and Omne ſcientificum, quantò profundiùs quaeritur, tantò glorioſiùs invenitur. He that does ſcire per cauſam knows more certainly and moſt uſefully. And therefore in ordinary and highway ſentences, and common Schoolboy Theams, He lets them not paſſe without enquiry An ſit? or Cur ſit? To which purpoſe though Democritus knows the Scholar furniſhed with ſome problematical Books, as du Pleſſis, Camerarius and others, yet he thinks Taſſonis Penſieri may be a ſtranger to many; and therefore having collected and compacted in brief ſome number out of his large Book, He will here beſtow ſome few of them on the Scholar, chooſing thoſe which are the more pleaſing and agreeable to the intent of this book, and leaving the more ſerious to his graver ſtudies in the Library, if ſhops will not help him with the Authour.

1. Becauſe it conſiſts in a more entire proportion betwixt black and white then other middle colours.

2. Becauſe it is the colour our ſight is accuſtomed to in graſſe, leaves, &c. (and that in the moſt pleaſant ſeaſon, when the air is moſt welcome, neither too hot nor too cold; when the Spring and youth of all things pleaſe us, &c. and ſo it delights us not only by ſenſe, but by memory reflecting on its concomitants, as ſome muſick though none of the beſt, delights more by remembrance of our youthfull dayes and company.)

3. Becauſe the eye being an Organ full of moiſture, is by ſympathy, as the taſte alſo, delighted with that colour which ariſeth from moiſture, and offended with the fire and Sun by reaſon of the dryneſſe.

This our Authour ſaith holds, except in a Gentle womans face, where green (if it may be called ſo) pleaſeth not.

Smell is given to unreaſonable creatures in ſuch perfection, as they can do many things by it, which men do by diſcourſe. As particularly Dogs, which by ſmell only know their Maſters, will finde them out in the night, and track them at the greateſt diſtance: Nay, they will not only ſmell out Beaſts and Birds that are hid, but they will pick a ſtone out of the bottome of the water, which hath been thrown after them, which ſeems a dull thing and not to yield any ſcent at all. But man ſerving himſelf by diſcourſe hath this ſenſe more remiſſe, not much at hand, and that little rather for relliſh then neceſſity, for a man may live without perfumes or flowers Indeed meats, when they have an aromaticall taſte conformable to their Nature, relliſh the ſweeter; as Wines, Fruits, Roſtmeat, and other viands: But on the other ſide, unſavoury and rotten meats are much more nauſeous to the ſtomack and offenſive to the brain. Beſides, all mea • s breed ſuch excrements as man cannot endure. And further, the heaps of dirt, dregs, dunghils, &c. are not only noyſome but peſtilen • iall. Nay, many wholſome things are lothſome, as lillies, Brimſtone, Phyſical drugs, &c. Now this happens not to other creatures; Smels, 'tis true, they will diſcern at more diſtance, but bad ſmels offend them not at hand, except in what is their own food. Wherefore men that have a bad ſcent or have loſt their ſmell, have the leſſe cauſe to be grieved for it, becauſe there are ſo many more bad ſmels then good ones. (Yea, and what my L. Verulam obſerves, Men have loſt their life by bad ſmels, which no good ſmels have power to recover.) Yet to recompence this, Thoſe that have a good ſmell have a good wit alſo, as Cardan obſerves, Quoniam calida & ſicca cerebri temperies olfactu praeſtat, talis verò ad imaginandum prompta ob caliditatem, & imaginum tenax eſt ob ſiccitatem▪ Neither is that true, which the Ancients obſerve, that man hath the moſt imperfect ſmell; for though he ſmell not at ſuch a diſtance▪ yet he diſcerns more ſpecies and differences of ſmels; other creatures breathing the ayr of no odoriferous things but ſuch only as ſerve them for food.

1. Scaliger ſaith, becauſe thoſe ſtones come out of waters, and therefore ſteal the moiſt ayre which is connaturall to them, which the heat of the Ayre concocting turns into drops.

2. But this comes to paſſe, becauſe thoſe moiſt vapours occaſioned by the South-winde in cloſe places, as Churches, Cloyſters, &c. where Marble is, cannot pierce the Marble as other poroſe bodies, and ſo making ſtay upon the ſtone are by its coldneſſe condenſed into drops. The ſame we ſee in wainſcoat being more cloſe and ſolid then other wood, and in ſmooth glaſſes if filled with cold water. Iron and Marble in open ayre have rather a dew then drops, becauſe of the plenty of attenuated and looſe moiſture, and the breathing of the Ayre which diſperſeth it, and the inclination of the water to ſeek communion and fellowſhip; whereas in dry places, as in duſt, upon a Table, on dry Marble, water will rowle it ſelf into little heaps, to unite and preſerve it ſelf againſt its enemy dryneſſe. And this is the reaſon of the roundneſſe of drops, and not that common one, that water doth it to conform it ſelf with the rotundity of the great maſſe of waters, which cannot be ſaid to be round but as conjoyned with the maſſe of the earth, both which do but make one globe.

1. Aristotle ſaith, Becauſe of its mixture with Ayre, and ſo Plutarch, Quòd de reliquis humidis maxime pellucidum eſt Oleum, quia in ſe plurimum habet Aeris. This we ſee in Ice, which becauſe of its mixture with Ayre is more tranſparent.

2. Another reaſon is, becauſe it is hot and full of ſpirits, as we ſee it will quickly take flame, which water will not; and therefore is it lighter, as we finde, the ſame veſſell weighs more filled with water then with oyle.

Although Oyle being hot will ſooner congeal then vinegar or water; yet that is not properly a freezing of Oyle, but only a more ready condenſation of it: for Oyle being of it ſelf a juyce of a condenſed ſubſtance, as it will be eaſily diſſolved by a tepedity of Ayre, becauſe of its own inward cooperating heat; ſo a little help of cold makes it return to his firſt originall.

1. Plutarch attributes this to the ſmell of the Sea-waters, and to the fear of thoſe that uſe not the Sea; for thoſe that are uſually upon the Sea will not vomit.

2. It is probable upon experience, that it is from the Agitation and toſſing of the Sea; and ſo it will fall out in the outlets of Rivers; becauſe a circular and confuſed motion is moſt repugnant to mans naturall motion which is erect and diſtinct; And therefore turning round alſo will turn a mans ſtomack; For the ſpirits being ſtirred, make the meat boyl on the ſtomack, and ſo lift it up to diſgorge it ſelf.

1. The excrementitious part of food is in others ſpent in Teeth and Horns, as Aroſtotle ſaith, and in man it is neceſſary as in other things, that Piloſity ſhould follow the moiſture of the brain.

2. Hair is Natures Fringe and fence againſt Heat and Cold; and in man, becauſe he goes upright, it is his cover, which in Beaſts that are crooked is no more neceſſary then on the other parts.

The blinde have a great infelicity, being unapt for action, and expoſed to the injuries of the world; beſides the very ſeeing is delightful; and the ſight, as Cardan, is Senſus nobiliſſimus, quòd procul magis, & plura, & exquiſitiùs, & celeriùs, & ſub pluribus differentiis decernit. But to be born deaf is certainly worſe, for beſides that with it they loſe their tongue alſo, they can know nothing of God and goodneſſe but by natural inſtinct and ſo are in the confines betwixt men and beaſts. And the blinde are but only debarred corporall actions, not intellectuall; So that we ſee divers blinde men Scholars, but none deaf:) yet the deaf and dumb man hath a late worthy Friend M. Bulwer, who laboureth, hopeth, and almoſt promiſeth to make him hear by the Eye, and thence to ſpeak alſo; a rare and noble attempt, and a miracle of Art; to which purpoſe Democritus hath ſeen cited the Title of the Spaniſh Authour in M. Merick Caſaubons Tract of Enthuſiaſme, and whether the work be in that learned mans cuſtody he cannot ſay.)

Becauſe the eye of man is black, and ſo is darkneſſe: and therefore the Organ and object confounding the fancy, it cannot apprehend becauſe it muſt gather by diverſity: And therefore thoſe that have white Eyes will be ſooner ſnowblinde, and can ſee better than others in the night; and Cats and Owls eyes are yellowiſh and reſemble the light, and therefore they ſee better in the dark. The reaſon why an Eagle can look upon the Sun (if ſhe do ſo) muſt be becauſe the Sun is an object too violent for us; but the ſpirits of the Eagle are more intenſe and united, having but only a Chryſtalline humour, but perhaps it is her brows cover her eyes, ſo that ſhe doth but ſeem to look upon it.

Becauſe the Gout being a biting viſcous humour, reſiding in the nerves; the ſoft and rich and lazy are generally troubled with it; and therefore a Capon not living abroad as other birds (but eſpecially if he be coop'd) and his complexion being like mans hot and moiſt, he will have the Gout; but ſo likewiſe will dogs that Ladyes keep, and horſes that ſtand in ſtables, The reaſon why women have not the Gout ſo much as men is, becauſe their humonrs are more fluid and more eaſie to be diſcharged.

In reſpect of Figure the Ape (who though is not therefore, as our Authour, cal'd Simia quia ſimilis, but à ſimo naſo in quo nobis est diſſimilis) But in reſpect of manners and community the Bee. For the Bee is a ſociable creature, obſerving her times, living under cover, burying her dead, not without her Queen, & being multiplyed, ſending out her colonies and ſwarms for a new Plantation, &c. (And who ſo is in love with the ſweet and cheap fruits of this induſtrious creature, may conſult, beſides our worthy M. Butler, the works of that publique friend of men (and of Democritus alſo) M. Samuell Hartlib.

The Crow exceeds all, if we conſider this earthly happineſſe to conſiſt in long life and content. Her fleſh is not deſired for food, no Nets or Gins are ſet for her. She her ſelf can feed upon any carion (and no carion will kill a Crow.) She never wants being omnivora; upon mountains, in the champain, on the ſands ſhe will finde paſture; She cares not for heat, or cold, ſhe will live in the Sun, in froſt, in the ſnow, and if rain be coming, ſhe will call for it. There is not a Bird more hardy, or careleſſe, or bold, or cunning then ſhe. (Therefore thoſe that are diſcontented, that they have not their portion in this life, and fall to wiſhing themſelves ſome a ſheep, &c. may do wiſely in their next thoughts to wiſh themſelves a crow.)

Alexander would have been Diogenes And theſe Cynicks ſeem to reduce Nature to its primitive purity, without art or ornament, retired from the ſenſes, contemning delights, and not diſtinguiſhing betwixt man and man.

But man being a reaſonable, ſociable, and cleanly creature, to be beneficial to Parents, Children, Countrey, Friends, &c. and ſerviceable for the publike good: It is not the part of a man but a Dog to bark at humanity and its offices, or rather the character of a Serpent the mortall enemy of mankinde. Not to labour for any others by any burthen or employment, and yet proudly to ſcorn all others; to live ſordidly in rags, to let his hair and nails grow; to lye in his own dung under no cover but a Tub, to make no difference of meat raw or roſted, to eat lice and drink with his mouth at a ditch, to ſtink to himſelf and others, is rather the property of an hog, then a dog, which is far more cleanly.

It is, becauſe as the ſenſes may be ſlow, ſo the Fancy is moſt quick in intelligent men, and therefore out of the curioſity and anxiety of coming to the ſumme and period of what they intend, they neglect circumſtantials in reading, writing, or ſpeaking, and therefore they reade falſe, write and ſpeak ſhort, and by a multitude of Figures.

1. Becauſe wiſedom being the pretogative of Age, and jeſts and toys all that is expected from youth; Precocity as in Joſeph, is counted a preſumption, to equall age, and outgoe their fellows in youth.

2. Becauſe it is premature, preventing Natures courſe, and being not digeſted and ſetled by experience, is rather to be called wit then wiſedom. (It is indeed miraculous, and modeſty makes it amiable, which graceth Gifts, and covereth infirmities. But in ſome places Muſhromes are accounted Dainties, and the Goſlings carry the Geeſe to watering.)

1. The reaſon in Politiques is, becauſe men can ſpy out with eaſe what will be found hard to be put in execntion, the reaſon of ſuch pretenders and promiſers conſiſts in Idea's, Chimera's, curioſities and impoſſibilities, not aimed at and unfit for action, and by the pomp of their words they would ſet out themſelves by ſlieghting the moſt difficult and deſperate enterprizes.

2. In Ethicks, vicious perſons talk Stoically of vertue, as it is in his excellency and exaltation; without reflecting upon themſelves or relation to practice; but only to pleaſe themſelves and others with the reputation and opinion of goodneſſe.

1. Becauſe of the abundance of heat and bloud in the ſimpler ſort, which makes them more bold, and is wanting in the temper of wiſemen.

2. Becauſe the Learned live a ſedentary life, far from dangers, wherein cuſtome doth harden the other.

3. Becauſe wiſe men are quick to foreſee, and adviſed to conſider the greatneſſe of a danger; whereas they who know them not, eſteem them not, and ſo are more daring.

4. Becauſe they duely eſteem the value of their life, not to be caſt away upon trifles, but reſerved for a ſacrifice. And whereas ſome hold it an argument of a generous and valiant minde to contemn a mans life; the wiſe man thinks, that he that cares not for his life deſerves it not; For life being the beſt naturall thing, none will deſpiſe it but a ſolemn fool, and they muſt confeſſe it little worth which they care not to loſe, and therefore Ariſtippus ſaid well, being taxed for timerouſneſs in a ſtorm, that there was oddes betwixt his life and the Boatmans.

It is true generally to a Proverb, that Honores mutant mores, and among many other there is a remarkable Story of the Son of Fabius being made Conſul, who ſeeing his Father coming over the way ſent him word, he muſt now honour him as Conſul, and forget himſelf to be his Father. And this comes to paſſe from the baſeneſſe of ſuch mens mindes, who remembring that in their meaner fortunes they handling others reſpectively were nevertheleſs neglected, they are now afraid the ſame ſhould fall out; and therefore to tame their acquaintance, they muſt let them know they muſt not build upon their ancient familiarity. And ſo they uſe them homely, give them a cold ſalute, make as if they did not know them, look ſowr, talk little and gravely, call them Goodman when they ſhould Sir, make them ſtay at their Portals, &c. And to their own ſervants and Inferiours, they look angerly, out-brave and rate them, that all men may know they are no ſmall Fools. But noble perſons knowing they are ſuch, and deſerve reſpect, if not otherwiſe, yet for their Nobility, which is a deſert of their Predeceſſors, deal more courteouſly; not ſo much to gain the good liking of others; but as knowing they deſerve not to be vilified in the memory of any thing paſt, ſo they fear not they ſhall be ſo uſed for the future.

1. Becauſe love doth mollifie rough and fierce ſpirits, as fire doth iron: and therefore it may well make your ſoft, jocund and ſparkling youths to be chanting.

2. It ſeems to be a natural inſtinct, as we ſee in birds, when they are to breed fall a ſinging. And as the antient rude times to expreſs Heroical and divine matters began in Poeſy, ſo the lover to ſet out his his love, as he conceivs her, above the condition of Mortals▪ runs to this natural old form by verſe and love-ſongs.

3. Becauſe the lover adorning and imbelliſhing his beloved with rings, jewels and bracelets, would adorn his conceits likewiſe with number, harmony, and mirth.

4. Amorous paſſions excite men more; and therefore diſpoſe men alſo to daunce though they have no art.

5. Becauſe both love and Poetry are kinds of fury; and come from or ſend up hot ſpirits to the brain: and therefore alſo men a little mad or drunk will rime without ſtudy.

Fables delight us, not as falſe, but as ſtrange and like to truth, And ſo children love Fables more than men, becauſe they apprehend them as true, and men love pictures and ſtatues more then children, becauſe they apprehend them as rare and artificial. For 1. out of curioſity our mind longs after rarities and novelties. And 2. the meer reſemblance of truth doth abuſe and force our fancy and underſtanding; inſomuch as we love imitations alſo better than realities, as of the gruntling of an Hog, and of grief and anger in players, which are ungrateful when they are natural.

But Manum de Tabula. Here is an enough for an example and a taſte, and to make the Scholar riſe with an appetite to the Authour. And Democritus could produce much more out of that Authours Treaſury, and ſome grains of his own he hath to adde to the heap, if that were now his buſineſſe. He now only ſhows how a Scholar looks upon theſe ordinary things with no ordinary eye; but withall ſearcheth either into the Truth of them; or the Cauſe, or the Uſe of them, yet before Democritus can get away from Scholars (as when he meets with them he is loth to depart) he knows they will be poſing him concerning the ſubject he hath undertaken; and ſeeing this Tract conſiſts of Apophthegmes and Proverbs, they will be trying his skill in the choice of them by an enquiry, whence it is that theſe come to have ſuch vertue and value above other ſpeeches. Wherefore let them put it to the queſtion.

Concerning Proverbs, they are generally magnified as the vulgar Rhethorick and Philoſophy▪ neither doth the Scholar deſpiſe them becauſe common, for though the common people uſe them moſt, yet they proceeded at firſt from the mouths of men in eſteem for wiſedom and learning. And becauſe the Scholar as yet hath not had his ſhare of theſe, here are ſome few ſorted according to the o •• er whereby their Vertues may be manifeſt. Of theſe ſome are Proverbiall rather then Proverbs, and perhaps properly only deſerve the Name, all the reſt being but the publiſhed ſayings and ſentences of witty men. Such of many are theſe.

A Friend at a ſneeze (the moſt thou canſt get of him is, God help thee.) Friers Charity (to convey you as far as the door.) He eats leaves and voids ſilk (all things thrive with him.) He may piſſe in bed, and ſay he ſweat, (his name is up.) Do good to your ſelves, (the Italian beggars word.) To go where the King cannot ſend an Embaſſadour (to ſtool.)

Theſe Proverbs or Sentences are valuable by the choice and uſe of them in the Scholars hands. And he conſiders them either in conſort or ſingle: In conſort, and ſo either in their conjunction or oppoſition: In conjunction with others of their kinde, and in order, of which there is a ſpecimen or two elſewhere; and this for a ſtock and furniture of wiſedome and goodneſſe: for Solomons wiſedom had not been ſo great, unleſs it had been like the ſand of the Sea, ſmall in its portions and parcels, and therefore ſo great in the whole maſſe and bulk.

But the Scholar doth more, and placeth within the ſame view thoſe ſentences or ſayings that ſeem to oppoſe or croſs one another, ſuch as theſe,

Sed quid fiet de Cive bono, cum Cacodaemones malum virum ad Inferos abripuerunt?

Sidiu illud habuiſti, perdis antequam ſatiat uses▪ ſi non diu, perdis antequam aſſueſcas.

And of ſuch Sentences, which may ſeem to croſſe, but do indeed ſet one another right, the Scholar findes many in his walks, ſome occaſionally ſcattered, as in Seneca's Tragedies frequently, others purpoſely proſecuted, as in Poſidippus and Metredorus old Epigrams of mans life, and in ſome late ingenious Eſſayes of Marriage, Platonick love, &c. but he hath a great example of them in the Antitheta of that great Advancer of Learning. And Democritus quamvis non paſſibus aequis, hath gone the ſame way, and hath ſome ſtore of theſe. And he thinks the Scholar, if he have not already, will finde it a way of good uſe and benefit; not for Grammaticall improper exerciſes of Declamations, nor for flaſhy and Rhetoricall uſes for oſtentation, as the old Orators and ſome late Lawyers, to ſhew a Scepticall faculty of diſcourſing on both ſides: nor much leſſe for any wicked uſe (though things of the ſtrongeſt vertues or ſpirits are capable of the greateſt both uſe and abuſe, and edge tools are not to be committed to Children or mad men) not to ingroſſe what is favourable to our ſelves, and throw what is odious upon others; nor for a deceitfull politique veyle to diſſimulation, which of all evils the Scholar abhors, being true to himſelf and to others▪ But for a more wholſome Philoſophicall, yea Divine uſe, to eſtabliſh, ſettle, and determine truth and goodneſſe; as Democritus hath ſeen ſome excellent Divines▪ out of this furniture mainly to have done. For as Bonum eſt ex integra cauſa, ſo Verum eſt ex conſpectis Circumſtantiis: and as Non eſt Bonum, quod non eſt Rationabiliter bonum; So Nil tam certum, quam quod ex Dubio certum.

In ſingle Proverbs thoſe challenge the firſt place which are akin to thoſe former in ſtating and caſing; and ſuch commonly are ſentences which are bimembres and dilemmaticall, ſuch are theſe which follow,

Shew a good man his errour, he turns it to a vertue; but if to an ill, he doubles his fault.

He who builds a houſe in the ſtreet, it is either too high or too low.

Honour the good, that he may honour thee; and the bad, that he may not diſhonour thee.

A Proverb muſt have ſomething in it more then an ordinary ſaying; Hyperboles and other Figures of Rhethorique are ordinary in it, ſometimes it affects a little of the Riddle, and ſome are ſo Aenigmaticall, which except in their own Countreys, will hardly be known without an Oedipus, as

He that can make a Fire well can end a quarrell (both hard to be done, ſo as to pleaſe all.)

A poor mans Cow dies, a rich mans Childe.

Diſeaſes of the eye are to be cured by the Elbow, (not to be cured till you dreſſe it with your Elbow.)

A married man turns his ſtaffe into a ſtake, (His ſtate is not ambulatory and at liberty, but fixed and ſetled.)

Rhithmicall Proverbs, and ſuch whoſe elegancy conſiſts in Figuris Dictionis are uncapable of Tranſlation, and are of the weakeſt ſort; yet uſuall both in learned and vulgar languages; and ſome pleaſure there is in the Muſick of the words, which if frequent will be counted but jingling and quibling, But of all Figures, the Metaphor is the moſt ordinary, and that taken either from ſuch things as are common and familiar to all men, or from thoſe arts and employments which are common and known where ſuch Proverbs have thier birth and breeding: Yet becauſe a ſimilitude with one leg is but lame, and capable of a miſapplication; therefore they are the more expreſſive and lively Proverbs, which have both the reſemblance and the thing reſembled briefly joyned together, as

Thus hath Democritus ſhown you the Vertues he obſerves in Apophthegmes and Proverbs, and the rather to ſhow to others how the Scholar looks into theſe common things: and knowing the Art could for a need be the Authou▪ of an Apophthegm or a Proverb▪ and in this as in all his other ſtudies it is his great deſire to leave every thing better than he finds it. He knows every man hath his humour, and Demacritus his; and as he hath approved theſe vertues, ſo he diſlikes not many, whereof he cannot give account wherein their vertue lyes: But as the Scholar will be ready to tell him, ſo is he as ready to tell them his weakneſſe: as at preſent Democritus is taken with the humour of a ſort of plain and vulgar Proverbs, and knows not why: He knows they have vertue in them, they are irrefragable and undeniable, they ſtop reply, they are granted as ſoon as ſpoken: they pleaſe, they convince, they gain more then they ſpeak for, and they are ſuch as theſe.

He that riſeth firſt is firſt dreſſed.

He that makes his bed ill, lies there.

Who hath bitter in his mouth, ſpits not all ſweet.

Fair Language grates not the tongue.

In every countrey dogs bite.

More are threatned then hurt.

In an hundred Ells of contention there is not an inch of love.

A peece of a Churchyard fits every body.

If every one mend one, all ſhall be mended.

All fleſh is not Veniſon.

All is not Butter the Cow lets fall.

There came nothing out of the Sack, but what was there.

A woman conceals what ſhe knows not.

Foul water will quench fire. (Luſt.)

And ſeeing it is ſo, that ſadneſſe doth not prolong life more then mirth: the Scholar whoſe life is precious hath his Recreations, and long may the Fruit-Tree ſtand which is long a growing but when it is grown bears the moſt fruir, and the moſt wholſome and pleaſant fruit: the Scholar therefore after ſadneſſe and dullneſſe contracted by the bent and aſſiduity in ſerious ſtudies hath his Relaxations, Nec ſemper arcum tendit Apollo. He hath either his Muſicall or Mathematicall Recreations, Hiſtory or Poetry, his Walks in Summer, and his Noctes Atticae in Winter; And in the peruſall of theſe Proverbs, and ſelecting and ordering of them to his readieſt uſe, he ſets aſide in a corner the Jocoſa, to ſport himſelf with in his vacations: ſuch theſe are to Democritus.

Be not a Baker if your head be of Butter.

He that hath a head of Wax muſt not walk in the Sun.

When a Knave is in a Plum-Tree, he hath neither Friend nor kin.

When one is on horſ-back, he knows all things.

He is mine Uncle that wiſheth me well.

He is my Neighbour, that grindes at my Mill.

Here is a talk of the Turk, and of the Pope, but my next Neighbour does me more harm then either of them both.

A fair Hoſteſſe makes a fowl Reckoning.

Ask mine Hoſt, if he have good wine.

Three can hold their peace if two be away.

He that tels his wife News is but newly married.