A Skeltonicall Salutation,
Or condigne gratulation,
And iust vexation
Of the Spanish Nation,
That in a bravado,
Spent many a Crusado,
In setting forth an Armado
England to invado.
Imprinted at London for Toby Cooke. 1589.
A SKELTONICAL salutation.
O KING of Spaine
Is it not a paine
To thy heart and braine,
And euery vaine,
To see thy traine
For to sustaine
Withouten gaine
The worlds disdaine,
Which doth dispise
As toies and lies,
With shoutes and cries
Thy enterprise,
As fitter for pies,
And butter-flies,
Then men so wise?
O waspish King,
Wheres now thy sting,
Thy dart, or sling,
Or strong bow-string,
That should vs wring,
And vnderbring,
Who euery way,
Thee vexe and pay,
And beare the sway
By night and day,
To thy dismay,
In battle aray,
And every fray?
O pufte with pride,
What foolish guide
Made thee provide
To over-ride
This land so wide
From side to side,
And then vntride,
[Page] Away to slide,
And not to abide,
But all in a ring
Away to fling?
O conquering,
O vanquishing
With fast flying,
And no replying,
For feare of frying!
So hurt vs stil,
As oft as you wil,
So fight your fil,
So shew your skil,
So sincke vs, and sacke vs,
So burne vs, and wracke vs,
So cleaue vs, and cracke vs,
And rent vs, and racke vs,
Or if you will remaine
In
Castile, or
Spaine,
And not venture againe,
Our force to restraine,
If you so it please,
You shall take your ease,
To cure your disease,
You haue got by the seas.
And though we be pore,
We will come to your shore.
And kno
[...]ke at your dore,
As oft heretofore.
And spare you the cost,
Which of l
[...]te you haue lost,
When as you were tost,
From piller to post,
To your small bost.
And cast on the sands,
And many Ilands,
Into your enemies hands,
And many a rocke,
[Page] With many a knocke,
For a laughing stocke,
And a iest, and a mocke,
But who but
Philippus,
That seeketh to nip vs,
To rob vs, and strip vs,
And then for to whip vs,
Would ever haue ment,
Or had entent,
Or hither sent,
Such ships of charge,
So strong and so large,
Nay the worst barge,
Trusting to treason,
And not to reason,
Which at that season,
To him was geson,
As doth appeare,
Both plaine and cleare,
To far and neere,
To his confusion,
By this conclusion,
Which thus is framed,
And must be named
Argumentum à minore.
Cum horrore & timore.
If one Drake o,
One poore snake o,
Make vs shake o,
Tremble and quake o,
Were it not trow yee,
A madnes for me,
To vndertake,
A warre to make,
With such a lande,
That is so mande,
Wherein there be
Of certaintie,
[Page]
As hungrie as he
Many a thousand more,
That long full sore
For Indian golde,
Which makes men bolde?
But you were blinde,
As now you finde,
Till in your kinde
You haue well tasted
How you are wasted,
With all your bragges,
Gennets, and nagges,
And mony bagges:
Whereof the most
The
Irish cost,
As a good host,
Doth now possesse,
With thankefulnesse,
And can no lesse,
Than the time blesse,
That you set out,
And came about,
With all your route,
So proude and stoute.
But wo to the heart,
That feeling smart,
For iust desart,
Growth worse and worse,
And God doth curse,
And cannot repent,
But keepeth entent,
Come sixe, or seven,
Come hell, or heaven,
To vndertake,
With all he can make,
A new invasion,
At the
Popes perswasion.
But
Spaniard proud,
[Page] The Lorde hath vowde
He will defend,
Vnto the end,
His Church and sheepe,
That his law keepe.
Wherefore to be short,
I thee exhort,
For thine owne comfort,
If witte thou haue,
Thincke him a knaue,
That doth advise
Such an enterprise:
For in this cause,
Our Faith and Lawes,
We will sell our liues,
Our landes, and wiues,
Too deere for thee,
When soever it be,
And ere it be long,
Make thee sing a song,
Of
O siscivissem,
Me continuissem,
Et nonfecissem.
But now
Pope blisse him,
And
Mydas kisse him,
And so I dismisse him,
To his good Phisition,
Master
Inquisition,
By whose disposition,
He taketh the diet,
That will him disquiet,
And turne vp-side downe,
(Which would make a man frowne)
Both kingdome, and crowne,
And fame and renowne,
And so sirs
valete,
Et vobis cavete,
A medicis ignaris.
[Page]
Chirurgis avaris,
Meretrice Romana,
Insulsa, & insana,
Et factione Guisiana.
Except you be so expert,
That you can convert,
At your own pleasure,
Which were a great treasure,
The Lutheran seas,
Which doe you displease,
To be of your faction,
And ioyne in your action.
Or some way can finde,
To master the winde,
Or else so to binde,
That it be to your minde.
And then
regnate,
Et prae gaudio cacate,
Per omnia monasteria monachorum.
A Question annexed, touching our seafish, nourished with Spanish bloud.
BVt now must I call,
My contrymen all.
And you Scotsmen tall,
And Irish rugges,
That were such hugges,
To the Spanish pugges.
As never were seene,
With your skeynes so keene,
So bright and cleene.
To tell you a surmise,
That of late did rise,
Which is to advise,
With the learned and wise
Whether for this yeare,
It were not best to forbeare,
[Page] On such fish to feede,
Which our coast doth breede,
Because they are fed,
With carcases dead,
Here and there in the rockes,
That were full of the pockes.
For Phisitions hold,
As I am tolde,
Such is our blood,
Either had or good,
In each degree,
As our aliments be:
Whereupon at this season,
Some make this reason,
Sith our Cods, and our Cunger,
Haue filled their hunger,
With the heads, and feete,
Of the Spanish Fleete,
Which to them were as sweete,
As a Goose to a Foxe.
And seeing the poxe,
Possessed each carkasse,
From the slaue to the Marquesse.
No man can avoide,
But he may be anoide,
If he make them his meate,
Be they little or great:
Except by some correction,
Or wholesome confection,
And by art they be so vsed,
That they neede not be refused.
Wherein the counsell,
Of those that can tell,
And in learning excell,
Would do verie well.
But if you enquire,
Of Masse-priest, or Frier,
To heare what they will chatter
[Page] Concerning this matter,
They will answere anon,
And sweare by Saint Iohn,
That every one,
Of the Fleete that is gone,
Was holy and good,
Both in flesh and blood.
And therefore obiect,
That they could not infect,
Neither fish, nor seas,
With any disease.
But leaue to the myre,
Both Priest, and Frier,
Or else to the sire,
For each is a lyer.
And touching the question,
Know this that disgestion,
Wheresoever it be found,
In things that be sound,
Is of such operation,
That it maketh separation,
Of the bad from the best,
And never doth rest,
Vntill in the ende,
It doth cleane away send,
That which doth offend.
And what can be found,
Either simple or compound,
Than a fish more sound?
Then doubt not I pray you,
Let nothing dismay you,
Or trouble, or fray you,
If fish be well drest,
And your stomackes not opprest,
You neede them not detest,
Howsoever they are fed,
Or wheresoever they are bred.
For both Frogs and Snailes,
[Page] And Mallards and Quayles,
Though on poyson they feede,
And many a weede,
And dangerous seede,
Both to man and beast:
Yet sith they them disgest,
They do no man harme,
Be they colde or warme.
Wherefore as is sayd,
Be no more afrayd,
On sea-fish to feede.
If them thou loue or neede.
But now I heare one say,
This question might stay,
As needlesse and vaine,
Because it is plaine,
That the Devill of hell,
Loved Spaniards so well,
That he carried them all,
Both great and small,
Either dead, or quicke,
Through thinne and thicke,
Both bodie, and soule,
To his pinnefole,
As the place appoynted,
For the
Popes annoynted.
FINIS.
Cum tua non fuerint heroica facta Philippe, Risu digna cano carmine ridiculo.
QVi regis Hispanos
Superbos, & vanos,
Crudeles, & insanos,
Multum aberrasti,
Cùm tnos animasti,
Et bellum inchoasti
Contra Anglos animosos.
Fortes, & bellicosos,
Nobiles, & generosos,
Qui te excitavit,
Proculdubio deliravit,
Et te fascinavit.
Nam omnes sperabant,
Qui te amabant,
Ideóque iuuabant,
Multùm te valere
Viribus & aere,
Hísque respondere
Animum generosum,
Caput tuum annosum,
Et pectus animosum.
Sed nunc cernentes,
Et conspicientes,
Licet dolentes,
Omnes tuas copias
Redactas ad inopias,
Migrasse ad Vtopias,
Stupent, & mirantur,
Plurimùm vexantur,
Et penè exanimantur.
At
Angli &
Germani.
Qui sunt Antihispani,
Et omnes mente sani,
De tuâ ruinâ,
Quâ paenâ divinâ,
[Page] Turbaris ad ima,
Valde laetantur,
Et exhilarantur,
Sibíque gratulantur,
Quod stultitia detecta,
Vi tua reiecta,
Et re infecta,
Ignominiam nactus,
Es in fugam actus,
Et funditus fractus.
Post tantos clamores,
Sumptus, & labores,
Mundíque terrores,
Sed vestros errores.
Non sapuisti,
Inquiunt isti,
Quando cecinisti,
Ante victoriam,
Falsam victoriam,
Et planè ingloriam:
Anglos superatos,
Prorsus subiugatos,
Et ad vnum enecatos,
Cum contrà conspectis,
Hostibus, & detectis,
Animis deiectis,
Illico trepidantes,
Et minime ovantes,
Vt animas exhalantes,
Ob ignis horrorem,
Qui vobis pavorem,
Incussit, & timorem,
Fuga matura,
Per maria obscura,
Aspera & dura,
Vobis consuluistis,
Vt bene novistis,
Probéque meministis,
[Page] Licet sine honore,
Non sine rubore,
Mundíque stupore.
O Angliae eversores,
O praeclari victores,
O promeriti honores!
Sic saepe redite,
Quoties libet venite,
Et
Anglos punite.
Sic operam impendite,
Sic agros divendite,
Et sic naves incendite.
Quis vnquam cogitasset,
Nisi ipsa confirmasset
Res, & probasset,
Patres tam acutos.
Subtiles, & astutos,
Calidos, & nasutos,
Vel prorsus neglexsisse,
Aut parum advertisse,
Aut non satis persensisse,
Argumentum a minore,
Quod suo summo cum honore,
Magnóque vestro cum dolore,
Draco vobis nectebat,
Cum vos vt decebat,
Pro meritis afsligebat,
Cum vobiscum disputabat,
Vrbes expugnabat,
Et singula vastabar.
Nam si ab vno
Dracone,
Pusillo homuncione,
Tanquam a crabrone,
A vobis excitato,
Paucis stipato,
Et vix armato,
Ita estis icti,
Vexati, & afflicti,
[Page] Superati & victi.
Non erat sapientis,
Compotis mentis,
Aut dialecticam callentis,
Angliam oppugnare,
Et ridiculè irritare,
Quae potest suppeditare,
Non paucos Dracones,
Plurimos scorpiones,
Et innumeros crabrones,
Quorum nullus recusabit,
Aut
Hispanum declinabit,
Cum res ipsa postulabit:
Sed se virum vult praestare,
Tam per terram, quàm per mare
Vbi licet provocare:
Licet Domini Inquisitores,
Evangelij osores,
Et patriae proditores,
Cum an tesignano
Suo Romano,
Et Antichristiano,
Ista ridebunt,
Pro fabulis tenebunt,
Et pro ioco habebunt,
Quia sunt elati,
Tumidi, & inflati,
Et prorsus excaecati.
Verùm hoc lugete,
Vlulate & flete,
Trepidate, & timete,
Viuere virunculum,
Valere homunculum,
Et strenuum Dracunculum,
Quem Deus excita vit,
Ab vtero segregavit,
Et in hoc educavit,
Vt manum extendat,
[Page] Ecclesiam defendat,
Et vobis rependat
Sanguinem Sanctorum,
Nec non Indorum,
A vobis occisorum,
Et iam arma prendere,
Naves conscendere,
Et ad vos contendere.
Et sic ô Rex valeto,
Mihíque praebeto
Aures, & caveto,
A fundo, & lapillo,
Sagitta, & bacillo,
Draconis pusillo:
Ne te cogat plorare,
Palinodiam cantare,
Et turpiter exclamare,
Ob amissos honores,
Sumptus, & labores,
Et Indiae cultores,
O si sciuissem,
Aut saltem credidissem,
Me continuissem,
Nec Papam amassem,
Nec filium necassem,
Nec Deum irritassem:
Et tune te accusabunt,
Salsè subsannabunt,
Et haereticum clamabunt,
Examina monstrorum,
Turba monachorum,
Fratrum, & sororum,
Et omnium Deorum
Deo exosorum,
Per omnia secula seculorum.
FINIS.