Because of our auncient acquaintance and familiaritie (deare friende Eusebius) I will make bolde with you to aske such que­stions as may be for my edi­fication and comfort, and of no other mat­ters but euen of religion, whereof I see you are an olde professor. And first of all, let me be bold to aske this question of you, how it pleased God to make you a true Christi­an, and a member of Christ Iesus whom I see you serue continually with a feruent zeale.

For that olde acquaintance that was betweene vs, and for that you are desirous to liue a godly life in Christ Iesus, I will not conceale the good worke of my God in me: therefore I pray you marke a lit­tle what I shall say, and I will declare vnto you the truth euen foorth of the feeling of mine owne conscience. The fall of Adam did make mee the heire of vengeance and wrath of God, and heire of eternall damna­tion, and did bring mee into captiuitie and bondage vnder the Diuell: And the Diuell was my Lorde and my ruler, my heade, my gouernor, and my prince, yea, and my god. And my will was locked & knit faster vnto the will of the Diuell, then coulde an hun­dred thousand chaines binde a man vnto a post. Vnto the Diuels will did I consent with all my heart, with all my minde, with all my might, power, strength, will and life: so that the lawe and will of the Diuell, was written as well in my heart, as in my members, and I ran headlong after the Di­uel with full soule, and the whole swing of all the power I had: as a stone cast vp into the aire commeth downe naturally of it self with al the violent swing of his own weight. O with what deadly & venemous heart did [Page 123] I hate mine enimies? with howe great ma­lice of minde inwardlie did I sley and mur­ther? With what violence and rage, yea with what seruent lust committed I adulte­rie, fornication, and such like vncleannes? With what pleasure and delectation like a glutton serued I my bellie? With what di­ligence deceiued I? Howe busilie sought I the things of the world? whatsoeuer I did worke, imagine or speak, was abhominable in the sight of God, for I could referre no­thing vnto the honour of GOD: neither was his lawe or will written in my members or in my hart, neither was there anie more power in me to followe the will of GOD then in a stone to ascend vpward of it selfe. And besides that I was a sleepe in so deepe blindnesse that I could neither see nor feele in what miserie, thraldome, and wretched­nes I was, till Moses came and awaked mee and published the lawe. When I heard the lawe truelie preached how that I ought to loue and honour God with all my strength and might from the lowe bottome of the heart, because hee did create mee lord ouer it, and my neighbour, yea mine enemies as my selfe inwardlie from the ground of my heart, because God hath made them after [Page 124] the likenesse of his owne Image, and they are his sonnes as well as I, and Christ hath bought them with his bloud, and made them heires of euerlasting life as well as I: and howe I ought to doe whatsoeuer God biddeth and to abstaine from whatsoeuer God forbiddeth, with all loue and meeke­nesse, with a feruent and burning lust from the entire of the heart. Then beganne my conscience to rage against the lawe and a­gainst God. No sea, bee it neuer so great a tempest was so vnquiet, for it was not possible for mee a naturall man to consent to the lawe that it should be good, or that God should be righteous which made the lawe: in as much as it was contrarie vnto my nature, and damned mee and all that I could doe, and neuer shewed mee where to fetch helpe, nor preached any mercy Rom. 4.: but onelie set mee at variance with God, and prouoked and stirred mee to raile on God, and to blaspheme him as a cruell tyrant. And indeed it was not possible to doe o­therwise, to thinke that God made me of so poisoned a nature, and gaue me an impos­sible lawe to performe: I beeing not borne againe by the spirite, and my wit, reason, and will beeing so fast glewed, yea nailed [Page 125] and cheined vnto the wil of the Diuell. This was the captiuitie and bondage whence Christ deliuered mee, redeemed and loosed me. His bloud, his death, his patience in suffering rebukes and wronges and the full wrath of God, his prayers and fastings, his meekenes & fulfilling the vttermost points of the lawe, appeased the wrath of God, brought the fauour of God to mee againe, obtained that God should loue mee first, & be my father, and that a mercifull father that would consider my infirmitie & weak­nesse, and would giue mee his spirit againe which hee had taken awaie in Adam, to rule, gouerne, and strengthen mee, and to breake the bandes of Sathan wherein I was so straight bound. When Christ was on this wise preached, and the promises rehearsed which are cōtained in the booke of God, (which preaching is called the gospell or glad-tidings,) and I had deepelie considered the same: then my heart began to waxe soft & melt at the bounteous mer­cie of God and kindnesse shewed of Christ. For when the gospell was preached, the spi­rite of God (me thought) entred into my heart, and opened my in warde eyes, and wrought a liuely faith in me, and made my [Page 126] woful conscience feele and taste how sweet a thing the bitter death of Christ is, & how merciful & louing God is through Christs purchasing and merits, and made mee be­ginne to loue againe, and to consent to the lawe of God how that it is good and ought so to bee, and that GOD is righteous that made it: lastlie it wrought in me a desire to bee whole, and to hunger and thirst after more righteousnesse and more strength to fulfil the law more perfectlie: and in all that I doe or leaue vndone to seeke Gods ho­nour and his will with meeknesse euermore condemning the imperfectnes of my deeds by the law.

Now then this good work of God to my saluation standeth in two pointes, the wor­king of the law, and the working of the gos­pell: the preaching of the lawe was a key that bound and damned my conscience, the preaching of the gospell was an other key that loosed me againe. These two salues (I meane the lawe & the gospell) vsed God & his preacher to heale and cure mee a wret­ched sinner withall. The lawe did driue out my disease and made it appeare, and was a sharpe salue and fretting corasiue, & killed the dead flesh, and losed and drewe the sore [Page 127] out by the roote, and all corruption. It pul­led from me all trust and confidence I had in my selfe, and in mine owne workes, me­rits, deseruings, and ceremonies, and rob­bed me of all my righteousnes, & made me poore. It killed me in sending me downe to hell, and bringing mee almost to vtter des­peration, & prepared the way of the Lord, as it is written of Iohn Baptist. For it was not possible that Christ should come vnto mee as long as I trusted in my selfe or in any worldly thing, or had anie righteousnes of mine owne, or riches of holie workes. Then afterwarde came the Gospell a more gentle plaister, which [...]oupled and swaged my wounds of my conscience and brought me health: It brought the spirit of God, which loosed the bandes of Sathan, and coupled me to God & his wil through a strong faith & feruēt loue. Which bands were to strong for the Diuell, the world, or anie creature to loose. And I a poore & wretched sinner felt so great mercie that in my selfe I was most sure that God would not forsake mee, or e­uer withdrawe his mercie and loue from mee,. And I boldlie cryed out with Rom. 8. Paul, saying. Who shall separate me from the loue of GOD, &c. Finallie, as [Page 128] before when I was bound to the Diuell and his wil, I wrought all manner of wickednes, for I coulde doe no otherwise, it was my nature: euen so nowe since I am coupled to God by Christes bloud, I do good free­lie, because of the spirit and this my nature. And thus I trust I haue satified your first de­maund.

Yea, but mee thinkes you doe too much condemne your self in respect of sinne. For I can remember that from your child-hood your were of a good and gentle nature, and your behauior was alwaies ho­nest and ciuill, and you could neuer abide the companie of them which were roisters and ruffians, and swearers, and blasphemers and contemners of Gods word, and drun­kards, which nowe are tearmed good fel­lowes. And your dealing with all men hath beene euer commended for good, faithfull and iust. What meane you then to make your self so abhominable and accursed, and to say, you were so wholie addicted vnto wickednesse, and your will so fearefully and miserablie in captiuitie vnto the will of the Diuell.

Brother Timoth. I know what I say, God giue mee grace to speake it with [Page 129] more liuelie feeling of my weaknes, & with a more bitter detestation of my sinne. By nature through the fall of Adam am I the childe of wrath, heire of the vengeance of God by birth: yea and so from my first con­ception: And I had my fellowshippe with the damned diuels vnder the power of dark­nes and rule of Sathan, while I was yet in my mothers womb: and although I show­ed not the fruites of sinne as soone as I was born nor lōg after: yet was I full of the natu­rall poyson, frō whence all wicked deeds do spring, & cānot but sin outwardly, as soone as I am able to work (be I neuer so yong) if occasion be giuen: for my nature is to sinne as is the nature of a serpent to sting: and as a Serpent yet young, or yet vnbrought foorth is full of poyson and cannot after­warde (when time and occasion is giuen,) but bring forth the fruites thereof. And as an Adder, a Toad, or a Snake is hated of man, not for the euill it hath done, but for the poyson that is in it, and hurt which it cannot but doe: so am I hated of God, for that naturall poyson which is concieued and borne with mee before I doe anie out­warde euill. And as the euill which a vene­mous worme doth, maketh it not a serpent, [Page 130] but because it is a venemous worme there­fore doth it euill, and poysoneth: euen so doe not our euill deedes make vs euill first, but because wee are of nature euill, there­fore doe we euill, and thinke euill, to eternall damnation by the lawe, and are contrarie to the will of God in our will, and in all things consent vnto the will of the fiend.

As yet I neuer had such a fee­ling of my sinne as you haue had: and al­though I woulde bee loth to commit anie sinne, yet the lawe was neuer so terrible vn­to me, condemning me, pronouncing the sentence of death against mee, and stinging my conscience with feare of euerlasting paine, as I perceiue it hath beene vnto you: therefore I feare oftentimes least my pro­fession of religion should be onelie in truth meere hypocrisie, I praie you let me heare your minde.

A true saying it is that the right waie to goe vnto heauen, is to sayle by hell, and there is no man lyuing that feeleth the power and vertue of the bloude of Christ, which first hath not felt the strange paynes of hell. But yet in these paines there is a difference: and it is the will of God that his children in their conuersion shall some [Page 131] of them feele more and some lesse. Ezechias Esai 33. on his death bedde complaineth that the Lorde breaketh his bones like a Lion, that he could not speake by reason of paine, but chattered in his throte like a Crane, and mourned like a Doue. Iob saith, that God is Iob. 6. 4. Iob. 13. his enemie and hath set him vp as a marke to shoote at, and that the arrowes of the al­mightie are vpon him, and that the poison of them hath dronke vp his spirite. Dauid Psal. 130. bewaileth his estate in manie Psalmes, but especiallie in the 130. Psalme, where he be­ginneth on this manner: Out of the deepe places haue I called vnto thee O Lorde, which is as though hee shoulde saie; O my poore soule fall not flatte downe, vexe not thy selfe out of measure: the burden of thy sinnes presse thee sore indeede but bee not for all that quite ouerwhelmed: thou art thrust downe so lowe into the depth of deepes that thou had neede crie aloude to bee hearde of him which dwelleth in the highest heightes: and the euerbur­ning hell fire is not farre from that lake whither thine iniquities haue plūged thee, [...]o that thou maiest perceiue as it were the Eccho of their cries and desperate how­ [...]nges which bee there cast out of all hope [Page 132] of euer comming forth. But the Lord which bringeth foorth euen to the borders of hell his best beloued when they forget them selues, knoweth also how well to bring them backe againe. Goe no further then down­warde, but li [...]t vp thy heart together with thine eie, and seeke vnto the Lord, to reach vnto thee his mercifull and helping hand. Againe in the scriptures wee finde exam­ples of men conuerted vnto the Lord with­out anie vehement sorrowe of their sinnes. What anguish of cōscience had the theefe vppon the crosse for his former life in his present conuersion at the houre of death? How was Lidia dismayed and cast downe in respect of hir wickednesse, like as Dauid was or Iob, whose heart God onelie is saide to haue opened to giue attendance to the preaching of Paul and Silas, who also euen presentlie after was readie to entertaine them, and to make them a feast in hir house, which she could not haue done if shee had beene in the perplexities of Ezechias or Da­uid. The same may be spoken of the Iailer, and of them which hearde Peters Sermon at Ierusalem, who for all that they had mur­dred our Sauior Christ, yet in their conuer­siō, their harts were onely for the time pric­ked. [Page 133] So then God in preparing vs, which in truth are nothing but fleshly and stincking doung-hils of sinne, nay verie vncleannesse & pollution it selfe, I saie, in preparing vs to be the tēples of his holy spirit to dwell in, & the store-houses to horde vp his heauenlie graces in, doth otherwhilesvse a milde and gentle remedie, & maketh the law to looke vpon vs, though with no louing & gentle, yet with no feareful countenance, & other­whiles in some he setteth a sharp edge vpon the law, & maketh it to wound the hart very deepe, and as a strong corasiue to torment them, & to frette & gnawe vpon their con­sciences. And we see by experience that a botch or a bile in a mans bodie, is as wel ea­sed of the corruptiō that is in it by the pric­king of the point of a small needle as by the launcing of a great raser. Wherfore if God by his spirit haue wrought in you sorrowe for sinne in anie small measure, though not in as great measure as you desire, you haue no cause to complaine: and in that you are greeued & sorrowfull for your sinnes, it is a good token of the grace of God in you.

Surelie this is a great comforte [...]ou giue mee, God make mee thankefull [...]or it. And I praie you more plainely shew [Page 134] me the state of your life till this houre, that I and all other may take warning by it.

That which may doe good vnto other men I will neuer conceale though it be to my perpetuall shame. As I was con­ceiued & born in sin, so my Parēts brought me vp in ignorāce & neuer shewed me my shame and miserie by Gods law: & I liued a long time, euen as a man in a dead sleepe or trance, and in truth I liued as though there were neither heauen nor hell, neither God nor Diuel. And the Diuel himself (as now I perceiue) did often perswade my secure conscience that I was the child of God, and shoulde be saued as well as the best man in the world: and I yeelded to this perswasion, and did verilie thinke it: so that when the preacher for wickednesse and securitie de­nounced Gods iudgementes and hell fire, I haue saide vnto my neighbours that I ho­ped I should be saued, and he should goe to hell: and when I was asked whether I could keepe all the commandements of the lawe I saide that I coulde, and being asked whe­ther I neuer sinned: I saide I thought that otherwhiles I did, marrie for them which were but fewe, I hoped God woulde haue mercie, and haue me excused. And all my [Page 135] neighbors were glad of my company, they spoke well of me, and I was taken for an ho­nest man, when as indeed, before God I was a vile beast, & the childe of wrath, inspired with the spirite of the Diuell continuallie. Well; afterward I heard the law preached and I sawe and remembred manie fearefull iudgements of GOD vpon men whom I in reason thought were as good men as I, then I beganne to consider mine owne e­state, and to perceiue my sinnes, and my cursednesse, and vpon a time aboue all o­ther, the curse of the lawe made mee in­wardlie afraide, and my flesh then be­ganne to tremble and quake: then I could not sleepe in the night season, I was afraide of euerie thing. If I were in my house, I thought the house would fall on my head; if abroade, I thought euerie crannie of the earth would open it selfe wider and swallow me. I started at euerie strawe, and at the moouing of a flie: my meate was lothsome vnto me, and I thought I was not worthie of so good a creature of God, and that God might iustlie turne it to my bane: the greefe of my heart for my life past made me shed abundance of tears: and vpon that I remembred (that I had heard read in the [Page 136] Church, in Dauids Psalmes, that his teares were his drinke, and that hee did wette his bed with teares. And now the Deuill chan­ged both his coate and his note, & in feare­full manner cryed in my eares, that I was a reprobate, his childe: that none of Gods children were as I am, that this griefe of my soule was the beginning of hell. And the greater was my paine, because I durst not open my minde vnto anie for feare they shoulde haue mocked mee, and haue made a iest of it. Wherefore I was fayne to go to a godlie learned Preacher: I shewed myne estate vnto him? after I had continu­ed with him the space of two or three daies. I receiued comfort both by the promises of mercie, which hee shewed mee in the booke of God, and by his feruent godlie and effectuall prayers: and I thanke God euer since I haue had some assurance (in spite of the Deuill) that I doe apperteine to the kingdome of heauen, and am nowe a member of Iesus Christ, and shall so con­tinue for euer.

How know you that God hath forgiuen your sinne?

Because I am a sinner & he is both able and willing to forgiue me.

I graunt that hee is able to for­giue you, but how know you that he will? you know your sinnes are very great.

I graunt: but Christs passion is far greater: and although my sinnes were as red as scarlet and as purple, yet they shall be as white as snow, and as soft as wooll.

Oh but you haue sinned verie often.

Tell mee not I pray you what I haue done, but what I will doe.

What will you doe?

By Gods grace it is my full pur­pose, and my earnest praier to God is, here­after to take better heede, and to amend my former life.

Is that inough thinke you?

What lacketh?

The fauour and mercie of God, that may cleane forsake you.

Nay that I will neuer graunt: for I am certainly perswaded of the fauour & mercie of God euen to the saluation of my soule.

Oh shewe mee that, that is the thing I earnestly desire, to bee assured of Gods speciall goodnes, euen by your fee­ling.

According as God hath giuen me to feele the same so will I shewe it you. And first of all the dealing of God towards me is a good argument to mee. In the first commandement, God hath commaunded me to take him to bee my God, and in the Lords praier he teacheth me to call him fa­ther: he hath created the world generallie and euerie creature particularlie for man & so for me, to serue for my commoditie, ne­cessity, and admonition. Also he hath made me after his owne image, hauing a reasona­ble soule, body, shape, where he might haue made me a Toad, a Serpent, a Swine, defor­med, frantick. Moreouer, he hath wōderful­lie preserued me in my infancie, childhood, youth, middle age hitherto from manifold dāgers & perils: all which do confirm in me a perswasion of Gods fatherlie loue: & that I should not doubt hereof: where I might haue beene borne of Turks, lo it was the wil of God that I should be borne of Christian Parēts, & be brought into Gods Church by Baptisme, which is the Sacrament of adop­tion, & requireth faith, as wel of the remissi­on of my sins as of sanctification and holi­nes to bee wrought of God in mee by his grace and holie spirite: where I might haue [Page 139] been borne in an ignorant time and region, God would that I shoulde be borne in these daies and in this countrie where is more knowledge reuealed then euer was here or in manie places els is. Where I might haue beene of a corrupt iudgement & entangled with manie errours of Papistrie, & of the fa­milie of loue, & of that hypocritical Brown, by Gods goodnes my iudgement is refor­med, and he hath lightened mine eies to see & my heart to imbrace his sincere truth. By all which things I doe confirme my faith of this that God alwaies hath beene, is, and wil be for euer my father, & at my departing forth of this world will giue me the crowne of euerlasting glorie. Secondlie when as man is euermore doubting of the promises of God be they neuer so certain, God of his infinite mercie to preuent all occasions of doubting, promiseth to giue his owne spirit as a pledge, pawne, or earnest pennie vnto his children of their adoption & election to saluation. Now since it pleased God to call me from hypocrisie to bee a member of his Church, I feel that in my self which I neuer felt or heard of before. In times past, I came to praiers and to the preaching of Gods word euen as a Beare commeth to the stake, [Page 140] now the word of God is meate and drinke to me, and praier is no burden vnto me, but my ordinarie exercise. If I rise in the mor­ning I am not well till I haue praied and gi­uen thankes to God, if I doe any thing it commeth into my minde to pray. In my praiers I finde great ioy and comforte and the exceeding fauour of God, I neuer think I can well take my rest, or doe anie thing else except first I aske it at Gods hande in Christ. Lastlie, when my minde and heart is whollie occupied in worldlie matters, I am stirred vp, and as it were drawne to pray vnto God for the remission of my sinnes, and the assurance of my saluation, and in praier I haue had those grones which for their greatnes cannot bee expressed. Nowe from whence commeth all this? From the Diuell? No. In these actions I haue found him my enemie, and a continuall hinderer of them. For he by his craft when I haue beene heauie and weake, hath assailed to prouoke me to some sinnes whereunto my cursed nature was most giuen. and I hauing yeelded to him, haue beene so hardened and blinded by those sinnes, that for a time I haue made light account of the worde of God and praier. Well then, peraduenture [Page 141] this came from mine owne selfe? No nei­ther. This cursed nature of mine hath beene more pleased and delighted with sinne, and with the pleasures of the world, then with such exercises, from which it draweth mee & presseth me down as lead. I cannot think that such a poisoning Cockatrice can laie such good egges, or that wild crabbe trees (such as all men are in Adam) can bring foorth sweete fruites according to the will of God, except God plucke them foorth of Adam, and plant them in the garden of his mercie, and stocke them, and graft the spi­rite of Christ in them. Wherefore these are the workes of Gods spirit, and my con­science is thereby certified that God hath giuen me the spirite of adoption, and there­fore that his fauour and mercie shall conti­nue towardes me for euer. For the giftes of God are without repentance, and whome God once loueth, him hee loueth for euer. Thirdlie, there bee certaine fruites of Gods children which I finde in mee, by which I am confirmed in Gods fauour. Saint Iohn in his first epistle saith, that hereby wee know that wee are translated from death to life because we loue the bretheren. Truelie [...] feele in my heart a burning loue towardes [Page 142] them which are good Christians though I neuer knewe them nor saw them, and I am verie desirous to doe anie good for them: and if drops of my heart bloude would doe them good they should haue them. More­ouer I hate all sinne and wickednesse with a bitter hatred, and I long to see the comming of my sauiour Christ to iudgement, I am grieued and disquieted because I cannot fulfill the law of God as I ought, all which I haue learned foorth of Gods word to be to­kens of Gods children. And thus you see what euidence I haue to shewe that I am a true member of the Church militant and in the fauour of God.

Haue you a stedfast faith in Christ (as these arguments seeme to proue) without all wauering, doubting, and distru­sting of Gods mercie?

No, no. This my faith which I haue in Christ is euen fought against with doubting, & euer assailed with desperation, not when I sinne onely but also in tentati­ons of aduersitie, into which God bringeth me to nurture me & to shew me mine owne heart, the hypocrisie & false thoughts that there lie hid, my almost no faith at al, and as litle loue, euen then happily whē I thought [Page 143] my self most perfect of all; for when tentati­ons come I cannot stand, when I haue sin­ned faith is feble, when wrong is done vnto mee I cannot forgiue, in sicknes, in losse of goods, in al tribulation I am vnpatient, whē my neighbor needeth my helpe that I must depart with him of mine owne, then loue is cold. And thus I learne & feele that there is no power to do good but of God only. And in al such tentations my faith perisheth not vtterlie, neither my loue and consent to the law of God: but they be weake, sicke, woun­ded & not cleane dead. As I dealt with my parents being a child, so now deal I towards God my louing father. When I was a child my father and mother taught me nurture & wisedome, I loued my father & all his com­maundements, and perceiued the goodnes he shewed mee, that my father loued mee, and all his precepts are vnto my wealth and profit, and that my father commandeth no­thing for anie need he hath thereof, but see­keth my profit onelie, and therefore I haue a good faith vnto all my fathers promises, and loue all his commaundements and doe them with good will, and with good will goe euerie daie to the schoole: And by [...]he waie happilie I sawe companie plaie, [Page 144] and with the sight was taken and rauished of my memorie, and forgot my selfe, and stoode, and beheld, and fell to plaie also for­getting father and mother & all their kind­nes, all their lawes, and mine owne profite also. How beit the knowledge of my fathers kindnes, the faith of his promisses, and the loue that I had againe vnto my father, and the obedient minde were not vtterlie quen­ched, but laie hid, as all things doe when a man sleepeth or lieth in a traunce. And as soone as I had plaied out all my listes, or else by some had been warned, in the meane season, I came againe to my olde professi­on. Notwithstanding manie temptations went ouer my heart, and the lawe as a right hangman tormented my conscience, and went nie to perswade mee that my father would thrust me awaie, and hang me if hee catched me, so that I was like a great while to runne away, rather then to returne to my father againe. Feare and dread of rebuke, and of losse of my fathers loue and of pu­nishment, wrastled with the trust which I had in my fathers goodnesse, and as it were gaue my faith a fall. But I rose againe as soone as the rage of the first brunt was past and my minde was more quiet. And the [Page 145] goodnes of my father and his olde kindnes came vnto my remembrance either by mine owne courage or by the comfort of another. And I beleeued that my father would not put me away or destroie me: and hee hoped that I woulde doe no more so. And vpon that I got me home againe, dis­maied but not altogether faithlesse: the olde kindnes would not let me dispaire, how beit all the worlde coulde not set mine heart at rest, vntill the paine had beene past and vn­till I had heard the voice of my father, that all is forgotten.

Seeing that you haue thus plainelie and truelie shewed the weaknes of yours, and consequentlie of all mens faith, shewe mee I praie you howe by the weakenes of faith a Christian is not rather discomforted then comforted and assured of his saluation.

God doth not so much regarde the quantitie of his graces as the truth of them, hee approoueth a litle faith if it bee a Math. 20. true faith: yea, if faith in vs were no more but a graine of mustard seede (which is the least of al other seedes) it should be effectu­al, and God would haue respect vnto it. The poore diseased beggar with a lame hande, [Page 146] hauing the palsie also, is able neuerthelesse to reach out the same and receiue an almes of a king: and so in like manner a weake and languishing faith is sufficiētly able to reach out it selfe and to apprehende the infinite mercies of our heauenlie king offered vnto vs in Christ. Faith in the 3. of Iohn, is com­pared vnto the eie of the Israelite, which al­though it were of dimme sight, or looked a squint, yet if it could neuer so little beholde the brasen Serpent, it was sufficient to cure the stings of the fiery serpēts, & to saue life.

Seing that you satisfie me in euery point so fully, shew me I pray you, whether a man may be wicked & haue faith, & whe­ther faith entring expelleth wickednes. For I haue heard some saie, that a mā might be­leeue the word of God; and yet be neuer the better in his life, or holier thē before he was.

Many there are which when they heare or read of faith at once they consent thereunto & haue a certain imagination & opiniō of faith: as whē a man telleth a storie or a thing done in a strāge land that pertei­neth not to thē at al: which yet they beleeue & tel as a true thing, & this imagination o [...] opinion they call faith, Therfore as soone as they haue this imagination or opinion [Page 147] in their heartes, they saie, verilie, this do­ctrine seemeth true, I beleeue it euen so: thē they thinke that the right faith is there, but afterward when they feele in themselues no maner of working of the spirite, neither the terrible sentence of the law, & the horrible captiuity vnder Satan, neither can perceiue any alteration in thēselues & that any good works follow, but find they are altogether as before, & abide in their old state, thē think they y ^t faith is not sufficient, but that works must be ioined with faith to iustificatiō: but true faith is only the gift of God, & is migh­tie in operation, euer working, being full of vertue: it renueth man, & begetteth him a fresh, altreth him, changeth him, & turneth him altogether into a new creature & con­uersatiō: so that a mā shal feel his hart clean changed, & far otherwise disposed then be­fore, & hath power to loue y ^t which before he could not but hate, & delighteth in that which before he abhorred, & hateth y ^t which before he could not but loue. And it setteth the soul at liberty & maketh hir free to fol­low the wil of god, & is to the soul as health to y ^e body after y ^t a mā is pined with lōg sick­ [...]es: the legs cannot bear him, he cannot lift vp his hands to help him, his tast is corrupt, [Page 148] sugar is better in his mouth, his stomacke longeth after slubbersauce and swash, at which a whole stomacke is ready to cast his gorge: when health commeth shee chan­geth and altereth him cleane, giueth him strength in all his members, lust and will to doe of his owne accorde that which before he could not doe, neither coulde suffer that anie man should exhort him to doe, & hath now lust in wholsome things, and his mem­bers are free and at libertie, and haue power to doe all things of his owne accord which belong to a sounde and whole man to doe. And faith worketh in the same manner as a tree bringes foorth fruite, of his owne ac­corde; and as a man neede not bidde a tree bring foorth fruite, so is there no lawe put to him that beleeueth and is iustified through faith, neither is it needefull. For the lawe is written and grauen in his heart his pleasure is dailie therein, and as with­out commaundement euen of his owne na­ture he eateth, drinketh, seeth, heareth, tal­keth, goeth: euen so of his owne nature without anie compulsion of the lawe bring­eth foorth good workes: and as an whole man when hee is a thirst tarrieth but for drinke, and when he hungreth abideth but [Page 149] for meate, and then drinketh and eateth na­turallie. Euen so is the faithfull euer a thirst, and an hungred after the will of God, and tarrieth but for an occasion: and whensoe­uer an occasion is giuen hee worketh natu­rallie the will of God. For this blessing is gi­uen them that trust in Christs bloude, that they thirst and hunger to doe Gods will. He that hath not this faith is but an vnprofita­ble babler of faith, and workes, and neither worketh what hee bableth, nor whereunto his words pretend. For he feeleth not the power of faith nor the working of the spirit in his heart, but interpreteth the scriptures which speake of faith and workes after his owne blinde reason, and foolish fantasies, not hauing any experience in himselfe.

Euerie member of Christs con­gregation is a sinner and sinneth daily some more, & some lesse, for it is written, 1. Ioh. 1. If we saie we haue no sin we deceiue our selues, and the truth is not in vs. And Paule, Rom. 7. That good which I would, that do I not; but that e­uill which I would not, that doe I. So it is not I that doe it (saith hee) but sinne that dwel­leth in mee. So the Christian man is both a sinner and no sinner, which how it can be shew it me by your experience.

I being one man in substance and two men in qualitie, flesh and spirite, which in me so fight perpetuallie the one against the other, that I must goe either backward or forwarde, and cannot stand long in one state. If the spirite ouercome in tentations, then is shee stronger and the flesh weaker. But if the flesh get a custome, then is the spirit none otherwise oppressed of the flesh then as though she had a mountaine on hir backe, and as we sometime in our dreames thinke we beare heauier then a milstone on our breasts: or when we dreame nowe and then that wee would runne awaie for feare of some thing, our legges seeme heauier then leade: Euen so is the spirite oppres­sed and ouerladen of the flesh through cu­stome, that shee strugleth and striueth to gette vp and to breake loose in vaine, vn­till the God of mercie which heareth my grone through Iesus Christ come and lose hir with his power, and put something on the backe of the flesh to keepe hir downe to minish hir strength and to mortifie hir. So then no sinner I am if you regard the spirit, the profession of my heart toward the lawe of God, my repentance and sorrowe that I haue both because I haue sinned and am [Page 151] yet full of sinne, & looke vnto the promises of mercie in our Sauiour Christ, and vnto my faith. A sinner am I if you looke to the frailty of my flesh which is a remnant of the olde Adam, and as it were the state of the wild oliue tree, euer and anone when occa­sion is giuen, shooting forth his branches, leaues, bud, blossome, and fruite also: which also is as the weakenes of one that is newlie recouered out of a great disease, by the rea­son whereof all my deedes are imperfect, and when occasions be great I fall into hor­rible deeds, and the fruit of the sinne which remaineth in my members breaketh out. Notwithstanding the spirit leaueth me not but rebuketh mee and bringeth mee home againe vnto my profession, so that I neuer cast of the yoke of God from of my necke, neither yeelde vp my selfe vnto sinne to serue it, but fight a fresh, and beginne a new battaile. And I had rather you should vn­derstande this foorth of the Scriptures, by the example of Ionas and the Apostles. Io­nas was the friende of God, and a cho­sen seruaunt of GOD, to testifie his will vnto the worlde. Hee was sent from the Lande of Israell, where he was a Pro­phet to goe amongest an Heathen people [Page 152] and the greatest citie of the worlde, then called Niniuie to preach that within fortie dayes they shoulde bee destroyed for their sinnes: which message the free will of Ionas had as much power to doe as the weakest hearted woman in the worlde had power, if shee were commaunded to leape into a tubbe of liuing snakes and Adders: as hap­pelie if God had commanded Sara to sa­crifice hir sonne Isaac, as he did Abraham, she would haue disputed with God ere shee had done it, or though shee were strong e­nough. Well Ionas hartned by his owne imagination, and reasoning after this man­ner; I am here a prophet vnto Gods people the Israelits: which though they haue gods worde testified vnto them daylie, yet des­pise and worshippe God vnder the likenesse of Calues & after all maner of fashions saue after his owne worde, and therefore are of all nations the worst and most worthie of punishment. And yet God for loue of a few that are among them, & for his names sake spareth and defendeth them: how then shal God take so cruel vengeāce on so great a multitude of thē to whō his name was ne­uer preached, & therefore are not the tenth part so euill as these. If I therefore shall goe [Page 153] preach, I shal lie & shame my selfe, and God too, & make them the more to despise God. Vpon this imagination hee fledde from the presence of GOD, and from the countrie where God is worshipped. When Ionas entred into the ship, he laide him downe to sleepe: for his conscience was tossed be­tweene the commandement of God which sent him to Niniuie, and his fleshlie wise­dome which disswaded and counselled him to the contrarie, & at last preuayled against the commaundement, and carried him an otherway as a shippe caught betweene two streames as the Poets faine the mother of Meleager to be betweene diuers affections? while to aduenture hir brothers death shee sought to sley hir owne sonne: wherevpon for verie payne and tediousnesse shee laye downe to sleep to put the commandement out of minde, which did so gnawe and fret hir conscience: as the nature of all the wic­ked is, when they haue sinned in earnest, to [...]eeke all meanes with riote, reuell, and pa­ [...]time to driue the remembrance of sinne [...]oorth of their hearts, as Adam did to co­ [...]er his wickednesse with apperns of figge­ [...]eaues. But God awoke him out of his [...]reame, and set his sinnes before his face: [Page 154] for when the lott had caught Ionas, thē be sure that his sin came to remēbrance again, & that his conscience raged no lesse thē the waters of the sea. And then he thought he onely was a sinner, and thought also that as verilie as he had fled frō God, as verily God had cast him awaie: for the sight of the rod maketh the naturall child not onely to see and acknowledge his fault, but also to for­get all his fathers old mercie and goodnes. And then hee confessed his sinne openlie, and of verie desperation to haue liued any longer hee had cast himselfe into the Sea betimes except they woulde bee lost also, for all this God prouided a fish to swallow Ionas. When Ionas had beene in the fishes bellie a space, the rage of his conscience was somewhat quieted, and hee came to himselfe againe, and had receiued a little hope: and the qualmes and panges of de­speration which went ouer his heart were halfe ouercome, then hee prayed to God, and gaue thankes vnto him. When Ionas was cast vppon the lande againe then his will was free, and he had power to go whe­ther God sent him, and to what God com­manded him, his owne imagination laid a­part: for he had ben at a new schole & in a [Page 155] fornace wher he was purged of much refue & drosse of fleshlie wisedom which resisted y ^e wisedom of God. For as far as we be blind in Adam we cannot but seeke and will our own profit, pleasure & glorie: & as far as we be taught in the spirit, we cannot but seeke and will the pleasure of God only. Then Io­nas preached to Niniuie, and they repented: thē Ionas shewed again his corrupt nature for all his trying in the Whales bellie. He was so displeased because the Niniuits peri­shed not, he was weary of his life & wished death for very sorrow, that hee had lost the glory of his prophecying in y ^t his prophecy came not to passe, but hee was rebuked of God, as in his prophecy you may read. The apostles Christ taught thē euer to be meek & to humble thēselues: yet oft they striued among themselues who should be greatest: the sons of Zebede would sit one on y ^e right hand of Christ, the other on the left. They would pray that fire might descend frō hea­uē & consume the Samaritans. Whē Christ asked, who say men that I am? Peter answered Thou art the sonne of the liuing God, as though Peter had beene as perfecte as an Angell. But imediatlie after when Christ preached [...]nto them of his death and passion, Peter [Page 156] was angry and rebuked Christ, and thought earnestlie that hee had raued, and not wist what hee had said, as at another time when Christ was so feruentlie busied in healing the people, that he had no leasure to eate, they went out to holde him, supposing that hee had beene beside himselfe. And one that cast foorth Diuelles in Christes name they forbadde, because hee waited not on thē, so glorious were they yet. And though Christ taught alway to forgiue, yet Peter after long going to schole, asked whether men should forgiue seauen times, thinking that eight times had beene too much. And at the last supper, Peter woulde haue died with Christ, but yet within fewe houres af­ter he denied him both cowardly & shame­fullie▪ And after the same manner, though he had so long hearde that no man must a­uenge himselfe, but rather turne the other cheeke to the smiter againe, yet when Christ was in taking, Peter asked whether it were lawfull to smite with the sworde, and taried no answere, but laide on rashlie. So that although wee bee once reconciled to God, yet at the first we be but children and yong scholers, weake and feeble, and must haue leasure to growe in the spirite, i [...] [Page 157] knowledg, loue, and deeds thereof, as yong children must haue time to growe in their bodies: and so in like manner the sting of the serpent is not pulled out at once, but the poyson of our nature is minished by lit­tle and little, and cannot before the houre of death be wholie taken awaie.

I perceiue by your godlie dis­course, the manifolde conflictes betweene the flesh and the spirite, and that the flesh is like to a mightie Giant, such a one as was Goliah, strong, lustie, stirring, enimie to God, confederate with the Diuell: and the spirite; like to a little childe, such a one as was little Dauid, new borne, weake and fee­ble, not alwaies stirring: nowe then what meanes do you vse to weaken the flesh, and strengthen the spirit.

I vse to tame my flesh with praier and fasting, watching, deedes of mercie, holie meditations & reading the scriptures, and in bodilie labour, and in with-drawing all manner of pleasures from the flesh, and with exercises contrarie to the vices which I finde in my bodie most inclined to, and with absteining from all things that encou­rage the flesh against the spirit: as reading of toyes and wanton bookes, seeing of [Page 158] plaies and enterluds, wanton communica­tion, foolish iesting, & effeminate thoughts and talking of couetousnes, which Paul for­biddeth Eph. 5. magnifying of worldly pro­motions. If these will not mortifie my flesh, then God sendeth me some troubles, and so maketh me to grow & waxe perfect, and fineth and trieth me as gold in the fire of tentations and tribulations. Thus verie often he maketh me to take vp my crosse & naileth my flesh vnto it, for the mortifying thereof. Marke this if God send thee to the sea, & promise to go with thee, he wil raise vp a tempest against thee, to prooue whe­ther thou wilt abide by his word, and that thou maist feele thy faith & weakenes and perceiue his goodnes: for if it were alwaies faire weather and thou neuer brought into such ieopardie, whence his mercie onlie de­liuereth thee, thy faith should bee onelie a presumption, & thou shouldest be euer vn­thankefull to God, and merciles vnto thy neighbour. If God promise riches, the waie therevnto is pouertie: whom he loueth him he chasteneth: whom he exalteth, hee ca­steth downe: whom he saueth he first dam­neth: hee bringeth no man to heauen, ex­cept he send him to hell first: if hee promis [...] [Page 159] life he slayeth first: when he buildeth he ca­steth downe all first: he is no patcher, hee cannot abide another mans foundation: he will not worke till all bee past remedie, and brought to such a case that mē may see how that his hād, his power, his mercy, his good­nes, his truth hath wrought altogether: hee will let no man be partaker with him of his praise and glorie: his works are wonderfull & contrarie to mans workes▪ who euer saue he deliuered his own sonne, his only sonne, his deere son, his darling vnto the death, & for his enimies, to win his enimies, to ouer­come thē with loue, that he might see loue & loue again, and of loue likewise to doe to other men, & to ouercome them with well doing. Ioseph saw the Sun and the Moone, and seauen starres worshipping him, neuer­theles ere that came to passe, God laid him where he could see neither sun, nor moone neither anie star of the skie, and that many yeres, and also vndeserued, to nurture him, to make him humble & meeke, & to teach him Gods waies, and to make him apte and meete for y ^t roome & honor: again he came to it, that he might be strong in the spirit to minister it well. God promised the children of Israel a land with riuers of milke & honie. [Page 160] yet hee brought them foorth the space of fortie yeares into a lande where in riuers of milke and honie were, but where so much as a drop of water was not, to nurture and teach them as a father doth his sonne, and to doe them good at the latter ende, to se­duce their cankred nature, to make them strong in the spirite to vse his benefites a­right. Lastlie God promised Dauid a king­dome, and immediatelie stirred vp Saul a­gainst him to persecute him, and to hunt him as men doe hayres with gray-houndes and to ferret him out of euerie hole, and that for the space of manie yeares, to turne him, to make him to mortifie his lustes, to make him feel his own diseases: in fine to make him a good man, and a good King.

But how if it come to passe that you be tempted to anie great sinne, and the fleshe ouercome the spirit, in what case are you then?

There is no bodie here but you & I, and I take you to bee a Christian and a faithfull friende: therefore I will shewe a little of my exhortation. The last yeare by reason of the dearth, I and my familie were put to great pinches, and most commonly we had nothing but bread and water: here [Page 161] vpon I bethought mee howe I might get somewhat to releiue my familie: It came in­to my minde that in our Towne a rich man had a great flocke of sheepe, and that I might take one of them without any hurt of him. I was verie loath at the first: but because there was such great stealing of sheepe, & I was in extremitie, in the night I went among his sheep and tooke a lambe, and told my familie that it was giuen me: I presently killed it, the skinne and the en­tralles I burned on my backeside, the fleshe wee dressed by quarters, and did eate it with thanksgiuing (as my manner is) but surely verie coldlie, and mee thought my prayer was abhominable in Gods sight. After I had thus done, we fared wel for the space of two daies, but I felt my heart hardned, and my lips were almost locked vp, that I could not as I was wont praise the Lord. The third night after, I went with a quiet conscience (mee thought) to my bedde, and then I slept soundlie till three of the clocke in the morning, but I dreamed that one came to carrie me to pryson, vpon that on a sud­den I awaked and beeing afraide looked a­bout mee and fell to consider why I should [Page 162] be afraide, and I remembred that I had sin­ned against God by robbing my neighbor: ô then my feare increased, and I thought that hell gaped to deuoure me, and the law looked vpon me with such a terrible coun­tenaunce, and so thundred in myne eares, that I durst not abide in my bed, but vp & to goe. Then the Diuell assailed me on euerie side, to perswade that God had cast mee a­waie: saying, they that be Gods, haue power to keepe his law, thou hast not, but brea­kest them: Therefore thou art a cast-awaie and a damned creature, & hell gapeth and setteth opē his mouth to deuour thee. And I thought with my selfe that I had beene al­waies a ranke hypocrite, for as the cloudes of the ayre doe couer the sunne, so that sometimes a man cannot tell by anie sense that there is anie Sun, the clouds & windes hiding it from our sight: euen so my cecitie and blindnesse, and corrupt affections, and the rage of my conscience did so ouersha­dow the sight of Gods seed in me, and so o­uerwhelme his spirite as though I ha [...] beene a plaine reprobate. And thus i [...] came to passe that Dauid making his prai­er to GOD according to his owne sens [...] [Page 163] and feeling, but not according to the truth, desired of God to giue him againe his spi­rite. Which thing GOD neuer doth in­deede: although hee made mee to thinke so for a time: for alwaies hee holdeth his hande vnder his children in their falles, that they lie not still as other doe which are not regenerate. I being thus turmoiled and stong with the conscience of sinne and the cockatrice of my poisoned nature, hauing behelde hirselfe in the glasse of the righte­ous law of God there was no other salue or remedie but to runne to the brasen Ser­pent Christ Iesus which shedde his blood, hanging vppon the crosse, and to his euer­lasting testament and mercifull promise, that it was shed for mee for the remission of my sinnes, therefore I got me speedilie into a close corner in my house, and there vpon my face groueling, I confessed my sinne and prayed after this manner in ef­fect. Father, what an horrible monster am I? What taytor? what rascall and villaine? thy mercie is woonderfull that hell hath not deuoured me hauing deserued a thou­sand damnations. I haue sinned, I haue sin­ned against thy godly, holy & righteous law [Page 164] and against my brother by robbing him, whome I ought to loue for thy sake as dear­lie as my selfe, forgiue mee father for thy son Christ his sake according to thy most mercifull promisses and testament: forget not good Lorde thy olde mercies shewed vppon me, let them not at this time in me be quite remooued. On this manner prai­ing I continued fiue howers, and GOD which is neere to all them that call vppon him, heard me, eased my paine, and assured mee of the remission of my sin. After pre­sently, for the more easing of my conscience I went to my neighbour, & betweene him and me vpon my knees confessed my fault with teares, desiring him to forgiue me, & I woulde (as Gods lawe requireth,) restore that which I stole foure folde: he (I thanke him) was contented and toke pittie on me, and euer since hath beene by Gods mercie my good friend. So by little and little God restored mee to my first estate, but (mee thinkes) I haue not that feeling which I had before, and haue bene worse euer since▪ God of his mercie amende me, and increase his graces in me.

Praised be God that we fel into this communicatiō; for I had thought that [Page 165] no mā had ben in such a case but I, for I frō my hart detest that babbling which in time past I haue vsed and I haue vowed with my selfe to vse it no more, and God hath giuen mee strength and will to paie my vowes & to keepe them halfe a yere or tweluemonth together, and then falling into a companie of the honester sort of good fellows, I take otherwhiles a cuppe of Nimis, for which af­terwards I am so touched in my conscience and so grieued inwardlie: that often I haue no delight in my meate: and then I vse prai­er and reading and meditating of the scrip­tures, and do receiue much comfort. But I praie you what thinke you, will not God condemne his children if they sinne?

No, for the ground-worke of our saluation is laide in Gods eternall ele­ction, and a thousande sinnes, nay all the sinnes in the worlde, nay all the Deuilles in hell cannot ouerthrow Gods election. And it maie bee that sins doe harden our hartes, weaken our faith, make sadde the spirite of God in vs: but take awaie faith, or altoge­ther quench the spirit, they cānot. God cō ­demneth no man for his sinnes, if he bee ad­opted in Christ. For then Ioseph, Abrahā, Dauid, Peter, Marie Magdalene, should bee [Page 166] condemned. God is like a father: & a father if his childe be sicke, and therefore be fro­ward, and refuse and cast away his meate, & hauing eaten it spew it vp againe, and in his fit be impacient, and raue, and speake euill of his father, yet I say the father wil not cast him forth of his dores, but pittieth him, and prouideth such things as may restore him to health, and when hee is whole remem­breth not his disordered behauior in his sicknes.

What means do you finde most effectuall to strengthē your faith, to increase Gods graces in you, and to raise you vp a­gaine when you are fallen?

Surely I haue very great comfort by the sacrament of the Lords Supper: for whereas I am spirituallye diseased, and am prone and readye to fall, and am most cru­elly oftentimes inuaded of the feend, the flesh, and the law, when I haue sinned: and am put to flight, and made to runne awaye from God my father: therefore hath God of all mercie and of his infinite pitty & bot­tomlesse compassion set vppe his sacra­ment as a signe vpon a hie hill, whence it may be seene on euery side far and neare to call againe them that be runne awaye. And [Page 167] with this sacrament he (as it were) clocketh to them, as a hen dooth for hir chickens, to gather them vnder the wings of his mercy▪ and hath commanded his sacrament to be had in continuall vse, to put vs in minde of his cōtinuall mercy laid vp for vs in Christs blood, and to witnesse and testifie it vnto them, and to be the seale therof. For the sa­crament dooth much more liuely print the faith, and make it sincke downe into the hart then do bare words onely. Now when the words of the testament and promises are spoken ouer the bread (this is my body that was broken for you: this is my blood that was shed for you) they confirme the faith; but much more when the sacrament is seene with the eies, and the bread broken, the wine powred out and looked on: and yet more when I taste it and smell it, As you see when a man maketh a promise vnto an­other with light words betweene thēselues & so they departed, he to whom the promis is made beginneth to doubt whether the other spake earnestlye or mocked, & doub­teth whether he will remēber his promise, to abide by it or no. But when any mā spea­keth with aduisement, the words are more credible: & if he swear, it cōfirmeth the thing [Page 168] more and yet the more if hee strike hands, if hee giue earnest, if hee call recorde, if he giue hand-writing & seale it: so is the more & more beleeued, for the heart gathereth: [...]o, he spake with aduisement, deliberation, & good sadnes, he clapped hands, called re­corde, and put to his hande and seale: the man cannot bee so faint without the feare of God as to denie al this: shame shal make him abide his promise, though hee were such a man as I could not compel him, if he woulde denie it. And thus we dispute, God sent his sonne in our nature, and made him feele our infirmities that moue vs to sinne and named his name Iesus, that is a Sauior, because he should saue his people frō their sinnes, and after his death he sent his Apo­stles to preach these glad-tydings, to thrust them in at the eares of vs, and set vp a sa­crament of them to testifie them & to seale them, and to thrust them in, not at the eares onely by rehearsing the promises of the te­stament ouer it: neither at our eies onely in beholding it, but beat them in through our feeling, tasting & smelling also, and to bee repeated dailie & to be ministred to vs. He wold not (think we) make half so much a do with vs if he loued vs not, & wold not haue [Page 169] his Sacrament to bee a witnes and testimo­nie between him & vs, to confirm the faith of his promisses that wee should not doubt in them, when we looke on the seales of his obligations wherewith he hath bound him­selfe: & this to keepe the promisses & coue­nants better in mind, and to make them the more deepely to sinke into our hearts, and be more earnestlie regarded.

Considering that this which you saie is too plaine, great shame it is that there is such neglect of the Sacrament as there is, and that it is so seldome vsed: but surelie want of faith, and the security which ouerspreadeth this our Countrie is the cause of it, the Lord if it be his will remoue the same. Now let me heare a litle how you lead your life, and haue your conuersation among men.

I haue my conuersation among men as sincere as I can in righteousnes and holines which is after Gods commaunde­ments: our Sauiour saith, Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorifie your Father which is in heauen.

It is but a dim light which wee can carrie before men, and small are our good works and to be esteemed of no value. [Page 170] If we were preachers, or rich men, or noble men, then we might saue soules, giue good coūsel, help manie by our almes, but you & I are poore men, of base birth, & of low de­gree, how can we then do anie good works.

As touching good works by that measure of knowledge that God hath giuen me, I thinke that all works are good which are done according to the obedience of Gods law in faith & with thankesgiuing to God, & with a mind desirous of his glorie a­lone, & I think that I or any mā els in doing thē, please God, whatsoeuer I do within the law of god, as when I make water. And trust me if either winde or water were stopped, I should feel what a pretious thing it were to do either of both, & what thāks ought to be giuen God therfore. Moreouer I put no dif­ference betweene workes, but whatsoeuer commeth into my hands that I do as time, place, & occasiō giueth, & according to my degree. For as touching to please God there is no work better then other: God looketh not first on my works, as the world doth, or as though he had neede of them: but God looketh first on my hart what faith I haue to his word, how I beleeue him, trust him, and how I loue him, for his mercie that he hath shewed mee, hee looketh with what heart I [Page 171] work, & not what I work, how I accept the degree hee hath put me in, not of what de­gree I am. Let vs take an example. You are a Minister and preach the worde, I am a kit­chen boy, & wash my maisters dishes. Of the ministerie hark what the Apostle saith: if I preach I haue nought to reioice in, for ne­cessitie is put vpon mee: if I preach not the gospel, as who should saie, God hath made me so, woe is to me if I preach not. If I do it willinglie (saith he) then I haue my reward; that is, then am I sure that Gods spirite is in me, & that I am elect to eternall life. If I do it against my wil, the office is committed to me, that is, if I do it not of loue to God but to get a liuing therby, & for a worldlie pur­pose & had rather otherwise liue: then do I that office which God hath put vpon mee, but do not please God. So then if you prea­ched not, or in preaching had not your hart aright you minister the office & they that haue the spirit of God heare his word, yea, though it were spokē by an Asse, & the woe belongeth to you: but & if you preach wil­ [...]ingly with a true hart & cōscience to God, then shal you feel the earnest of eternal life and the working of the spirit of God in you. And your preaching is a good work in you. [Page 172] Now I that minister in the kitchin, and am but a kitchin boy, receiue all thinges at the hand of God, knowe that God hath put me in such an office, submit my selfe to his wil, and serue my Maister, not as a man but as Christ himselfe, with a pure heart, accor­ding as Paul teacheth me, putting my trust in God and of him seeke my reward. More­ouer there is not a good deede done, but mine heart reioiseth therein, yea, when I heare that the word of God is preached by you, and see the people turne vnto God: I consent to this deede, my heart breaketh out in me, yea it springeth and leapeth in my breast that God is honoured, and in my heart I doe the same that you doe with the like delectatiō & feruency of spirit. Now he that receiueth a Prophet in the name of a Prophet, receiueth a Prophets reward, that is, he that consenteth to the deede of a Pro­phet and maintaineth it, the same hath the same spirite and earnest of euerlasting life which the Prophet hath, and is elect as th [...] Prophet is. Nowe if wee compare worke to work, there is a difference betwixt washin [...] of dishes, and preaching the word of God but as touching to please God none at all▪ For neither that nor this pleaseth God, bu [...] [Page 173] as farre foorth as God hath chosen a man, and hath put his spirite in him, and purified his heart by faith & trust in Christ. As the Scriptures call him carnall which is not re­nued by the spirit & borne again in Christs flesh, & al his works like, euen the verie mo­tions of his heart and mind, as his learning, doctrine, and contemplation of hie things, his preaching, teaching, and studie in the Scripture, building of Churches, founding of Colledges, giuing of almes, and whatso­euer he doth, though they seeme spirituall, & after the law of God neuer so much: So contrariwise he is spirituall which is renued in Christ, and all his workes which spring from faith seeme they neuer so grosse, as the washing of the disciples feete done by our Sauiour Christ, and Peters fishing after the resurrection, yea deedes of matrimonie are pure spirituall if they proceede of faith, and whatsoeuer is done within the laws of God though it be wrought by the bodie, as the verie wiping of shooes and such like, how­soeuer grosse they appeare outwardlie, yet are sanctified.

What be the speciall thinges in which you lead your conuersation?

One thing is the reading of the [Page 174] Scripture.

It is dangerous to read the scrip­tures, you that haue no learning may easilie fall into errors and heresies.

As he which knoweth his letters perfectlie, and can spell, cannot but read if he be diligent: and as hee which hath cleare eies without impediment or let, and wal­keth thereto in the light, & open daie, can­not but see, if he attend and take hede: euen so I hauing the profession of my Baptisme onelie written in my heart, and feeling it sealed vp in my conscience by the holie Ghost cannot but vnderstād the Scripture, because I exercise my selfe therein, & com­pare one place with another and marke the manner of speech, and aske here and there the meaning of a sentence of them that be better exercised then I. for I feele in my hart and haue a sensible experience of that in­wardlie, which the spirite of God hath deli­uered in the Scriptures. So that I find mine own feeling as a good cōmentarie vnto me.

We are all baptized, belike the [...] we shall all vnderstand the Scriptures.

But alas verie few there be that are taught & feele their ingrafting into Christ, their iustification, their inwarde dying vnto sin & liuing vnto righteousnes, which is the [Page 175] meaning of their Baptisme. And therefore we remaine all blinde generallie, as well the great Rabbins which brag of their learning, as the poore vnlearned laie man. And the Scripture is become so darke vnto thē, that they grope for the dore & can find no waie in, & it is become a maze vnto thē in which they wāder as in a mist or (as we saie) led by Robin goodfellow. And their darkenes can not comprehend the light of the Scriptures but they read them as mē do tales of Robin hood, as riddles, or as olde priests read their Ladies mattins, which they vnderstand not. And vntil a mā be taught his baptisme, that his heart feele the sweetnes of it, the Scrip­tures are shut vp frō him, & so dark that he could not vnderstād it, though Peter, Paul, or Christ himself did expound it vnto him, no more then a man starke blinde can see though thou set a candle before him, or shew him the Sun, or point with thy finger vnto that thou wouldest haue him looke vpon. As for heresie there is no danger if a man come to the Scripture with a meeke spirit seeking there to fashion himselfe like vnto Christ according to the profession and vowe of his Baptisme: but contrari­wise hee shall there finde the mightie pow­er of GOD to alter and chaunge him in [Page 176] the inner man by litle and litle til in processe he be full shapen after the image of our Sa­uiour in knowledge and loue of all truth, & power to worke thereafter. Heresies spring not of Scripture, no more then darkenes of the Sunne, but are darke cloudes which spring out of the blind hearts of hypocrites giuen to pride and singularitie, and doe co­uer the face of the Scripture and blind their eies that they cannot beholde the bright beames of the Scripture.

By this I also can gather that the Papists which cannot reade the Scrip­tures except they fall into errours haue not the spirite of Christ working in them, and teaching them, but the lying spirite of An­tichrist the Diuel, and that if God woulde giue them anie true feeling, and open their eies they would quite change their minds. But what other exercises haue you?

Praier and thankesgiuing to God. For God hath promised verie bountifullie vnto them which praie in truth, and it is one of the greatest comforts I haue at all times. Again, God which commandeth me not to steale, commandeth me also to pray, and his will is, that one commandement should be as well kept as an other: and ther­fore [Page 177] I am perswaded that condemnation will befall me as well for the one as for the other. And that praier ought to be conti­nuallie euen in euerie thing a man doth, me thinketh it most agreeable to Gods will. For if I shoulde come into my neighbours house and take his goods, and vse them, not borrowing them or asking anie leaue, they would laie handes on mee, and make mee a thiefe. The world and all the thinges in the world are the Lords, not mine: so then if I shall dailie vse them, neuer seeking to the Lorde by praier for the vse of them, before God I am an vsurper, nay a ranke thief, and therfore I desire of God heartily that I may vse all his good creatures with feare and re­uerence, and that I may sanctifie his name in thē, which Paule sheweth me to be done by the worde of God and praier, the worde showing me the lawful vse of his creatures: praier obtaining at Gods hands, that I may vse them aright. If this practise were vsed of men in their professions and callings, I am perswaded there would be a thousand vices [...]ut off which are in euerie mā most aboun­ [...]ant and are committed without shame.

Timoth. I thinke the rest of your Christi­ [...]n exercises bee the practising of the com­mandements [Page 178] of the lawe.

Yea they are indeed.

Me thinkes it is an hard point of the law for a man to loue his enemie.

It is indeede: yet in the faithfull it wilbe so: for they haue in their harts a per­swasion, that wheras they are dāned in thē ­selues, yet in Christ the mercie of God is most plentiful to their saluation, and all this God confirmeth and sealeth vnto them by his holie spirite, and therefore they cannot but loue God again, and that with a feruent loue euen aboue al things in the world, and so they loue all Gods creatures, and euen their enemies, because they beare the image of God whom they loue: like as if I haue a friend and loue him, I loue all of his name, all his kinred, and all that appertaine vnto him. And by the waie, here is a good waie to know whether we haue faith or not Though faith onelie iustifie and make the marriage betweene our Soule and Christ and is properlie the marriage garment, yea and the signe Tau, that defendeth vs from the smiting and power of euill Angels, an [...] is also the rocke on which Christs Churc [...] is built, and standeth against all weather o [...] winde and tempest: yet is faith neuer seu [...] [Page 179] red from hope and charitie: then if a man will be sure that his faith is perfect, let him examine himselfe whether he loue the law, and in like manner if he will know whether hee loue the lawe, that is, loue God and his neighbour, then let him examine himselfe whether he beleeue in Christ onelie for the remission of sin, and obtaining the promises made in the scripture. And euen so let him compare his hope of the life to come with faith, and loue, & to the hatred of sin in his life, which hatred the loue of the law ingen­dreth in him. And if they accompanie not one another all three together, then let him be sure all is but hypocrisie.

Yet by your leaue faith cannot make a man iust before God without hope and charitie: then they also with faith haue some stroke in iustification.

I answere, though they be insepa­rable, yet I praise God I doe conceiue howe these three haue three separable & sundrie offices. Faith onlie is an vndoubted & sure [...]oue in Christ, & in the father through him [...]ertifieth the conscience▪ that the sin is for­giuē & the dānation of the law taken awaie. And with such perswasions mollifieth the [...]art & maketh it loue God again & his law. [Page 180] And as oft as we sin, faith only keepeth that we forsake not our profession and that loue vtterlie quench not, & hope faile, & onlie maketh the peace again: for a true beleeuer trusteth in Christ alone and not in his own workes nor ought else for the remission of sins. The office of loue is to powre out a­gaine the same goodnes that it hath recei­ued of God vpon hir neighbor, to be to him as it feeleth Christ to be to it self. The office of loue is onelie to haue compassion, and to beare with hir neighbour the burden of his infirmities. 1. Pet. 4. Loue couereth the multitude of sins: (that is to saie) cōsidereth the infirmities & interpreteth al to the best, & taketh for no sin at al a thousand thinges of which the least were inough (if a man lo­ued not) to goe to lawe for, & to trouble & disquiet an whole Towne, and sometime a whole Realme too. The office of hope is to comfort in aduersitie, and to make patient that we faint not, nor fall downe vnder the Crosse, or cast it of our backes. Thus these three inseparable haue separable offices & effects, as heat, & drynes, being inseparable in the fire haue yet their separable operati­ons, for drynes onelie expelleth the moist­nes of all that is consumed by fire, and hea [...] [Page 181] onelie destroieth the coldnes. And it is not Fides sola non est sola. all one to saie, the drynes onelie, and the drynes that is alone, neither is it all one to saie, faith onelie, and faith that is alone.

You are to be commended, you are so perfect in these high points of religi­on, but I know you speake of experience, for in you faith & hope towardes God & cha­rity towards your neighbor are inseparable.

I require no commendations: shame and confusion befall mee eternallie, that all glorie may be vnto God.

But let vs talke on further of our dueties which we must performe if we will liue Christian like among men. And I praie you tell mee what doe you meane that you giue so much vnto the poore, considering you are so poore your self, I speake my con­science, if you had abilitie you woulde doe more thē an hundred of those rich men do.

God knowes my heart, it is a hell vnto me to see my brother for whom Christ shed his bloud to want if I haue anie thing in the world to giue him. Among Christian men loue maketh all things common: eue­rie man is others debter, and euerie man is bound to minister to his neighbour, and to supplie his neighbours lacke of that where­with [Page 182] God hath indued him. Christ is Lord ouer all, & euerie Christian is heire annex­ed with Christ, & therefore Lord ouer all, and euerie one is Lord of whatsoeuer ano­ther hath: if then my brother or neighbour need, I haue to helpe him: and if I shew not mercie but withdrawe my hands from him, then rob I him of his owne, & am a thief. A Christiā mā hath Christs spirit, now Christ is merciful, if I shall not be mercifull, I haue Rom. 8. not Christs spirit: if I haue not Christs spi­rit thē am I none of his. And though I shew mercie vnto my brother, yet if I doe it not with such burning loue as Christ did vnto me, I must knowledge my sinne and desire mercie in Christ.

If a man must be franke and free, then a man must giue of his owne stocke to the poore and diminish his own substance.

Yea indeed we are made stewards of those goods which God hath giuen vs, & shal a steward take all vnto himself without reproof. I am sure that they which were co­uetous Act. 2. at Peters first Sermon after Christs ascention, diminished their substance when they sold them & gaue them to the poore. I am sure that the Churches which were in 2 Cor. 8. Macedonia which sent reliefe vnto their [Page 183] Churches euen aboue their abilitie, they beeing in extreame pouertie did dimisse their possessions: and God graunt our con­uersations may be like theirs. And that wee should be like thē, their examples of great compassion are recorded in the Scriptures.

Many of vs haue our selues, wife, chil­dren, father, mother, & kinsfolke to relieue, so y ^t it wil be hard to deale after this manner.

Had not these men I named, so? yea I warrāt you had they. And the wāt of loue which you deeme of the Gospell of Christ, knoweth not y ^t a mā should begin at himself & thē descēd I wot not by what steps. Loue 2 Cor. 12. seeketh not hir own profit, but maketh a ma to forget himself, & turn this profit to ano­ther mā, as Christ sought not himself or his own profit but ours. This terme (my self) is not in the gospel, neither yet father, mother sister, brother, kinsmā, y ^t one should in loue be preferred before another. The loue that springeth out of Christ excludeth no man, neither putteth difference betweene one & other. In Christ wee are all of one degree without respect of persons. Notwithstan­ding though a Christian mans hart be open to all men & receiueth all men, yet because his abilitie of goods extendeth not so farre, [Page 184] this prouision is made that euerie man should care for his owne housholde, as fa­ther, mother, thine elders that haue holpen thee, wife, children and seruants. When a man hath done his duetie to his houshold, and yet hath further aboundance of the blessing of God, that he oweth to the poore that cannot labour and cannot get worke, and ar [...] destitute of friendes, to the poore I meane which he knoweth, and to them of his owne parish. For that prouision ought to be had in the Church, that euerie parish prouide for the poore. If his neighbours which hee knoweth bee serued, then is hee debter to the brethren a thousand miles off, if he heare of their necessity, & haue himself anie plentie: yea, to the verie Infidels he is a debter if they need, as farre forth as he doth not maintaine them against Christ. Thus is euerie mā that needeth my help, my father, mother, sister, & brother in Christ: euen as euerie man that doth the will of the father, is father, mother, sister, and brother vnto Christ.

Now ye somewhat perswade me of that which me thought at the first blush, was against common sense.

By Gods grace I will perswade [Page 185] you more yet. How if our sauiour Christ Ie­sus should, now dwell vpon the earth in po­uertie & want, could you not be contented, to bestow halfe your goods on him?

Halfe my goods? Nay truely all: and my heart blood: for I knowe if I should loose my life for him, I should saue it.

Verie well. Christ is all in all. E­uerie Christian man to another is Christ himselfe, and whatsoeuer is doone to the poore, is doone to Christ himselfe and therefore your neighbours neede hath as good right in your goods as hath Christ himselfe which is heire and Lord o­uer all. And looke what you owe to Christ that you owe to your neighbours neede: to your neighbour owe you your heart and life and whatsoeuer you haue or can doe.

Wee need not giue our reliefe except the poore require it.

Aske or not, if they want you are bound to relieue them, As Christ loued you, so loue them. Christ loued you be­ing his enimie, when I am sure of it you neuer asked remission of sinnes.

Wee neede not releeue them often, need we?

Yes, as long as you are able, and [Page 186] as oft as they want. If Christ should forgiue vs but once, we should come short of hea­uen.

The world is full of naughtines, and lewde people take pleasure in dooing wrong, and in slandering, and in hindering their brethren: how can you liue among them in quietnes, do you vse to giue like for like?

No, you must vnderstand that there bee two states or regiments in the worlde: the kingdome of heauen which is the regiment of the Gospell: and the regi­ment of the worlde, which is the temporall kingdome. In the first state there is neither father nor mother, neither maister, mistres, maide, nor seruant, nor husband, nor wife, nor Lord, nor subiect, nor inferior woman, but Christ is all, & each to other is Christe himself, there is none better then other, but all alike good, all brethren, and Christ onlie is Lord ouer all, neither is there any other thing to doo, or other law, saue to loue one another as Christ loued [...]: In the tempo­rall regiment, is husband, wife, father, mo­ther, sonne, daughter, mistres, maide, man­seruant, subiect, Lord? Now euery person is a double person, and vnder two regimēts: [Page 187] in the first regiment I am a person of mine owne selfe vnder Christe and his doctrine, and maye neither hate nor be angrie, and much lesse fighte or reuenge: but must after the example of Christe, humble my selfe, forsake and denie my selfe, and hate my selfe, and caste my selfe awaye, and bee meeke and patient, and let euery man goe ouer mee and treade mee vnderfoote, and doo mee wronge: and yet I am to loue them, and praye for them as Christ did for his crucifiers: for loue is all, and whatso­euer is not of loue, is damnable, and cast foorth of that kingdome. In the temporall regiment thou art a person in respect of an other, thou art husband, father, mother, daughter, wife, lord, subiect, and there thou must doe according to thine office. If thou be a father thou must doe the office of a fa­ther and rule, or else thou damnest thy selfe: thou must bring all vnder obedience, whe­ther by faire meanes or by foule: thou must haue obediencc of thy wife, of thy seruants, and of thy subiects, if they will not obeye in loue, thou must chide, fight, and correct, as farre as the lawe of GOD and the lawe of the lande will suffer thee: Now to the purpose: whether a man maie [Page 188] resist violence, and defend or reuenge him­himselfe: I saie naie, in the firste state where thou art a person for thy selfe alone, and Christs disciple, there thou must loue and of loue doe, studie and enforce: yea & suffer all thinges (as Christ did to make peace, that the blessing of God may come vppon thee, Which saith, blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall bee the chil­dren of God. If thou suffer & keepe peace in thy selfe onely, thy blessing is the pos­session of this worlde: but if thou so loue the peace of thy brother that thou leaue nothing vndoone or vnsuffered to further it, thou shalt possesse heauen. But in this worldlie state where thou art no priuate man, but a person in respect of other, thou must and art bounde vnder paine of dam­nation to execute thine office. Of thy ser­uants thou must exact obedience, and must not suffer thy selfe to bee dispised. If thou art a ruler, thou must take, imprison, and sley to, not of malice and hate to reuenge thy selfe, but to defende thy subiectes and to maintaine thine office: the ruler must not oppresse his subiects with rentes, fines and customes, at all, neither pill them with taxes, and such like to maintaine his [Page 189] owne lustes: but bee louing and kinde vn­to them as Christ was to him: for they be the price of his bloode. I will shewe my minde more plainelie by one example. You are in your fathers house among your brethren and sisters, there if one fight with another, or if anie doe you wrong, you maie not reuenge or smite, for that pertai­neth to the father onelie. But if your Fa­ther giue you authoritie in his absence and commaunde you to smite, if they will not bee ruled but abuse you, then you are ano­ther person. Notwithstanding yet you haue not put off the first person, but are a brother still, and must euer loue and proue all thinges to rule with loue: but if loue wil not serue, then you must vse the office of an other person, or sinne against your fa­ther. Euen so when you are a temporall person you put not of the spirituall: there­fore you must euer loue, but when loue will not helpe, you must with loue execute the office of the temporall person. You must loue your neighbour in your hart, be­cause he is your brother in the first state, yet you must obeie your ruler who hath power ouer you, and when neede requireth at his commandement you must goe with the [Page 190] constable or like officer and breake open your neighbors doore, if hee will not open it in the kings name: yea if he will not yeld in the kings name, you maie smite him to the ground till he bee subdued, and looke what harme he getteth, that be vppon his owne heade.

I vnderstand you well. As I am a member of the spirituall bodie of Christ I must in all my conuersation follow him with patience, meekenes, and long suffe­ring, ouercomming other mens euils with weldoing: yet if the hurt be greater then I can beare, I must take a new person on me, and if I be a ruler, with loue seeke amend­ment, if a subiect, then in the feare of God, complaine to my ruler. But further I pray you soile me this doubt. If I shall be taken for a soldier, me thinks that I should then shake off all loue and meekenes, & then I could not practise this Christian rule.

Yes, if our Queene (God saue her grace) should send you on warfare into an­other countrie, you must obeie at Gods commandement, and go and auenge your Princes quarrell, which you knowe not but that it is right. When you come thether, remember the two stats in which [Page 191] you are: and knowe that in the firste state, that is, the regiment spiritual, you must loue them with whome you fight, and that they are your brethren bought with Christes blood, as well as you, and for Christes sake hate them not, yet as you are in the second state a Souldior at your Princes comman­dement, you must fight against them, and mainteine your Princes quarrell, and bring them vnder hir power: and therewithall be content with your Princes wages, neither desire your aduersaries life or goods, saue to aduantage your Prince. So then a Souldior neede not cast away meekenes, for he may fight with his enemie and slaye him, and yet loue him.

Another thing I would knowe of you, which now commeth to my minde, I haue a Landlord, he seemeth to be a verye good man, he countenanceth all the good prechers in our country, & he rideth vsually ten miles to hear sermons: I hold of him an house & a little land, not scarse enough to find my poore family: my lease is come out & I haue taken a new lease, but I haue paide such a great fine, and my yearly rents are so racked, that I feare I & all my houshold are like to beg our bread, this is it disquieteth [Page 192] me, and almost maketh me at my wits end, what is your counsell and aduise?

Surelie it maketh my hearte to bleede to see how manie men bragge of the Gospell, and yet what little fruite the gos­pell hath in them, and what little loue they shew, euen they which abound in rents and landes. My poore aduise is this, that you would with patience depende vppon Gods prouidence. It is said, blessed are the meeke for they shall inherite the earth, Then let all the world studie to doe you wronge, yea let them studie to bring you to extreeme mise­rie, and doe it too: yet if you bee meeke, you shall haue foode and raiment enough for you & yours: And no doubt, God (who is alwaies true of his promise) shall raise vp some to helpe you. And my counsell is that you giue your landlorde now and then a Capon, now a pigge, now a Goose, and if you bee able a lambe or a Calfe, and let your wife visite your Land-ladie nowe and then with spiced cakes, with apples, peares cheries and such like: and bee you readie with your Oxen, or horses, fiue or sixe times in the yeare, to fetch home thei [...] wood, to plowe their land, then no doubt God maie soften their hartes & moue them [Page 193] to haue some pittie & compassion on your [...]oore estate.

I haue done all this. Naie (maie [...]t be spoken betweene you and me) I am at commandement, & am as a drudge to thē, [...]o do their busines, and to leaue my owne [...]ndone, and yet haue neither meat, drinke, [...]or monie.

More is the pittie. But remember [...]hat they which cannot come to see men [...]eale vprightly in the world, yet do in their [...]arts hunger and thirst after this righteous­ [...]es, are pronounced blessed. Matth. 5.

To let this passe: shew me one [...]ule howe I might generallie in all matters [...]e haue my selfe among men: and then for [...]his time I will cease to trouble you.

Aske your own conscience what [...]ou maie or ought to do. Would you men [...]id so with you? then doe you it. Would [...]ou not bee so delt with? then doe it not. [...]ou would not that men should doe you [...]rong and oppresse you. You would not [...]at men should doe you shame & rebuke, [...]e on you, kil you, haue your house frō you, [...]tice your seruant away, or take against [...]ur wil ought that is yours. You wold not [...]at mē shold sell you false ware, when you [Page 194] put thē in trust to make it readie, or to lay it out for you: and you woulde not that men should deceiue you with great othes, swea­ring that to be good which is indeed verie nought: you would not that men should sel you ware that is nought, & too dere, to vn­doo you: doe no such thing then vnto your neighbours, but as loth as you woulde bee to buie false ware, and too deere, for vndo­ing your selfe: so loth bee you to sell false ware, or too deere, for vndooing your neighbor. And in al cases how glad would you be to bee holpen, so glad bee to helpe your neighbour. So in all things aske your conscience what is to bee done betweene your neighbour and you, and she wil teach you. But because you are wearie of reaso­ning I will also end. Desiring God to en­crease in vs his heauenlie graces, as faith and repentance, and loue according to his good pleasure.

Amen.

OVile helhound, thou art my slaue, and my vassall, why then shakest thou off my yoke.

By nature I was thy vas­al, but Christ hath redeemed me.

Christ redeemeth no Repro­bates, such as thou art.

I am no Reprobate.

Thou art a Reprobate, for thou [...]halt be condemned.

Lucifer, to pronounce dam­ [...]ation, belongeth to God alone: thou art no Iudge, it is sufficient for thee to bee an accuser.

Though I cannot condemne thee, yet I know God will condemne thee.

Yea, but God will not con­demne me.

Goe too, let vs trie the matter. Is not God a Lorde, and a King ouer thee and maie he not therefore giue thee a lawe to keepe, and punish thee with hell fire, if thou breake it?

Yes.

And hast thou kept the lawe o [...] this thy Lord and King?

No.

Let vs proceede further? Is not the same Lord also a most righteous iudge, & therfore a most sharpe reuenger of sinne?

Yes truelie.

Why then wilt thou flatter thy selfe thou hypocrite: God cannot winke a [...] thy sins, except he should be vniust. Wher [...] ­fore there is no remedie, thou art sure to b [...] damned: hell was prouided for thee, & now it gapeth to deuoure thee.

There is remedie inough to de­liuer me from condemnation. For God i [...] not onelie (as thou affirmest) a Lord and Iudge, but also a sauing, and a most merci­full Father.

But thou fire brande of hell fire, and childe of perdition, looke for no mer­cie at Gods hands, because thou art a most grieuous sinner: for,

• 1. Originall sinne runneth whollie ouer thee, as a lothsome botch or leprosie.
• 2. Thy minde knoweth not the thinges that be of God:
• 3. In the lawe of God thou art starke blinde, sauing that thou hast a fewe princi­ples of it to make thee inexcusable.
• 4. The Gospel is foolishnes and madnes vnto thee: thou makest no better accompt of it then of thine owne dreame.
• 5. Thy conscience is corrupt, because▪ it flattereth thee, and excuseth thy sinne.
• 6. Thy memorie keepeth and remem­breth nothing, but that which is against Gods word; but thinges abhominable and wicked, it keepeth long.
• 7. Thy will hath no inclination to that which is good, but onelie to sinne and wic­kednesse.
• 8. Thy affections are set onelie on wic­kednes: they are as mighty Giants and Prin­ces in thee, they haue thee at commande­ment. Remember, that for verie anger thou [...]ast beene sicke: that the lust of thy flesh [Page 240] hath driuen thee to madnes: forget not thy Atheisme, thy contempt of Gods worde, thy inward pride, thy enuie, hatred, malice, thy couetousnes, and infinite other wicked desires, which haue led thee captiue, and made thee outragious in all kind of naugh­tines.
• 10. Thy actuall sinnes committed part­lie in secrete, partlie in publike, are most fil­thie and most infinite. Remember howe in such a place, at such a time, thou didst com­mit fornication: in another place thou did­dest steale, &c. God saw this I warrant thee [...] yea, all thy sinnes are written in his booke [...] wherefore thou cursed wretch, all hope of mercie is cut off from thee.

But Gods mercie farre excee­deth all these my sinnes: and I cannot bee so Isai. 1. 18. Acts. 1. 23. 38. 1. Tim. 1. 15 Psal. 103. 11. 12. 13. infinite in sinning, as God is infinite in mer­cie and pardoning.

Darest thou presume to thinke of Gods mercie? why, the least of thy sinnes deserueth damnation.

None of my sinnes can feare Isai. 53. 2. 3 4. 5. me, or dismaie me. Christ hath borne the full wrath and vengeance of his Father vp­on the Crosse, euen for me, that I might be▪ deliuered from condemnation, which was [Page 241] due vnto mee.

If Gods purpose were not to condemne thee, perswade thy selfe, hee would neuer laie so manie afflictions and crosses on thee, as he doth. What is this want of good name? this weaknes and sick­nesse of the bodie? these terrours of thy minde? this dulnesse and frowardnes of thy hart? what are all these (I saie) and manie other euils, but the beginnings, and cer­taine flashings of the fire of Hell.

Nay, rather my afflictions are [...]liuelie testimonies of my saluation. For god as a louing Father, partlie by them, as with Heb. 12. 6. 9. 10. 1. Pet. 2. 21. Gen. 42. 21 [...]courges chastneth my disobedience, and bringeth me into order: partly conformeth me vnto my Sauiour Christ, and so by little and little, layeth open to mee mine owne 1. Cor. 11. 12. Rom. 8. 26. sinnes, that I may dislike my selfe and hate them: and maketh mee to renounce the [...]or [...]de, thy eldest sonne, and stirreth me vp to call vpon him, & to praie earnestly with [...]grones and sighes, which I am not able to expresse with anie wordes, as I feele them.

Thy afflictions are heauie, and [...]omfortlesse, therefore they can not be ar­guments of Gods fauour.

Indeed their nature is to bring griefe and heauines to the soule, but I haue had ioy in the middest of my afflictions, & Rom. 5. 2. 3. 4. strength sufficient to beare them, and after them haue ben many waies bettered, which befalleth to none of the wicked: and for that Rom. 8. 28. Psa. 119. 71. cause, it is a great perswasion to mee, that [...] shal not be damned with the wicked world, but in spite of all thy power, passe frō death to euerlasting life.

After these thy manifold afflicti­ons, thou must suffer death, which is mo [...] terrible, and a verie entrance to Hell.

Death hath lost his sting b [...] Christes death: and vnto me it shall be no­thing els but a passage vnto euerlasting life▪

Admit thou shalt bee deliuere [...] from hell by Christ, what will this auail [...] thee, cōsidering that thou shalt neuer com [...] to the kingdome of heauen? for Christe [...] death only deliuereth thee from death eter­nal, it can not aduance thee to euerlastin [...] life.

I am nowe at this time a mem­ber of Christs kingdome, and after this lif [...] shall raigne with him for euer in his euerla­sting kingdome. Rom. 5. ver. 8. 3. 4.

Thou neuer didst fulfill the law [...] [Page 243] therefore thou canst not come into the kingdome of heauen.

Christ hath perfectlie fulfilled euerie part of the lawe for mee: and by this his obedience imputed vnto mee, I my selfe do keepe the lawe.

Be it so, for all this, thou art farre inough from the kingdome of heauen, into which no vncleane thing shall euer enter: thou, although that Christ hath suffered death, and fulfilled the lawe for thee, yet thou art in part vncleane: thy cursed nature and the seedes of sinne are yet remaining in thee. Rom. 2. 3. Ioh. 17. 19.

Christ in the virgins wombe was perfectly sanctified by the holie ghost: and this perfect holines of his humane na­ture is imputed to me: euen as Iacob put on Esaus garments, to get his Fathers blessing: so I haue put on the righteousnes of Christ, as a long white robe couering my sinnes, & making me appeare perfectlie righteous, e­uen before Gods iudgement seat.

Indeed, God hath made promise Iohn. 3. 14. 15. vnto mankinde in all these mercies and be­nefits in Christ: but the condition of this promise is faith, which thou wantest, and therfore canst not make anie accompt, that [Page 244] Christes sufferings, Christes fulfilling of the lawe, Christes perfect holinesse, can doe thee anie good.

I haue true sauing faith.

GOod syr, I knowe Esay. 50. c▪ 4. the Lord hath giuen you the tongue of the learned, to be able to minister a word in time to him that is wearie: therefore I praie you helpe me in my miserie.

Ah my good brother what is the matter with you? and what aile you?

I liued a long time, the Lorde he knoweth it, after the manner of the worlde, in all the lustes of my filthie flesh, and then I was neuer troubled; but it hath pleased▪ God of his mercie to touch my heart, and to send his own sonne that good shepheard Iesus Christ, to fetch me home to his owne fold, euen vppon his owne necke: and since that time it is a wōder to see how my poore heart hath beene troubled: my corruption so boiles in me, & Sathan will neuer let me alone.

Your case is a blessed case: for not to be troubled of Sathan, is to bee pos­sessed [Page 264] of him: that is: to be held captiue vn­der Colloss. 1. c. 13. the power of darknes, and to be a slaue & vassall of Sathan: for Luke 11. c. 24. as long as the strong man keepes the hold, all things are in peace: Contra­riwise he that hath receiued anie sparkle of true faith, shall see Mat. 16. c. 18. the gates of hell, that is, the Diuell and all his Angels in their full strength, to stand vp against him, and to fight with an endlesse hatred for his finall confusion.

But this my trouble of minde, hath made mee oftentimes feare lest God would reiect me, and vtterlie depriue me of the kingdome of heauen.

But there is no cause why it should so doe. For how should heauen bee your resting place, if on earth you were not troubled? how could God wipe awaie your teares from your eies in heauen, if on earth Bradford. you shead them not? You woulde bee free from miseries, you looke for heauen vpon earth. But if you wil go to heauen, the right waie is to saile by hell. If you will sit at Christs table in his kingdome; you must be with him in his temptations. You are as Gods corne, you must therefore goe vnder the flaile, the fanne, the milstone, and the o­uen, before you can bee Gods bread. You [Page 265] are one of Christes lambes, looke therefore [...]o be fleeced, and to haue the bloudie knife [...]t your throte all the daie long. If you were [...] marke sheepe bought to bee solde: you [...]hould be stalled and kept in a fatte pasture: [...]ut you are for gods own occupying, there­ [...]ore you must pasture on the bare cōmon, [...]biding stormes, tempestes, Sathans snat­ [...]hes, the worldes woundes, contempt of [...]onscience and frettes of the flesh. But in [...]his your miserie I will bee a Simon vnto you [...]o helpe you to carrie your crosse, so bee it [...]ou will reueale your minde vnto mee.

I will do it willingly, my temp­ [...]ations are either against my faith in Christ [...]r against repentance for my sinnes.

What is your temptation as [...]ouching faith?

Ah, woe is mee, I am much [...]fraide least I haue no faith in Christ my Sauiour.

What causeth this feare.

Diuerse things.

What is one?

I am troubled with manye doubtings of my saluation: and so it comes [...]nto my minde to thinke, that by my incre­dulitie I should quite cut off my selfe from [Page 266] the fauour of God.

But you must knowe this one thing, that hee that neuer doubted of his saluation neuer beleeued, & that he which beleeueth in trueth feeleth manie doub­tings & wauerings, euen as the [...]ound man feeles manie grudgings of diseases which if he had not health he could not feele.

But you neuer knewe anie that hauing true faith doubted of their saluatiō.

What will you then saie of the man that saide Mar. 9. 24. Lorde I beleeue, Lorde helpe my vnbeleefe. And of Dauid who made his moane after this manner: Is his mercie cleane gone for euer? Doth his promise faile for euermore, Psal. 77. ve. 8. 9. 10. Hath GOD forgotten to bee mercifull? Hath he shutt vp his tender mercie in displeasure? Yea hee goeth on further, as a man in dis­paire. 11. And I saide, this is my death. Hereby it is manifest that a man indued with true faith maie haue not onelie assaults of doub­ting, but of desperation. This further ap­peareth in that he saith in another place. Psal. 92. 11. Why art thou cast downe my soule? Why art thou disquieted within mee? Waite on God for I will yet giue thankes, hee is my present helpe and my God. And in verie truth you maie perswade your self that they are but 2. Thes. 3. 2. vnreasonable men, that [Page 267] say they haue long beleeued in Christ with­out anie doubting of their saluation.

But Dauid had more in him then I haue, for me thinkes there is nothing in this wicked heart of mine, but rebellion against God, nothing but doubting of his mercie.

Let me know but one thing of you: these doubtinges which you feele, do you like them? or doe you take anie plea­sure in them? and doo you cherish them?

Naie, naie, they appeare verie vilde in mine eyes, and I doe abhorre them from my hearte: and I woulde faine be­leeue?

In man wee must consider his Ro. 7. ca. 5. estate by nature, and his estate by grace. In the first he and his flesh are all one, for they are as man and wife: therefore one is necessa­rie to the doings of the other. When the flesh striueth the man also striueth that is in subiection to the flesh, yea when the fleshe perisheth, the man likewise perisheth be­ing in this estate, with the fleshe: a louing couple they are, they liue and die together. But in the estate of grace, though a man haue the flesh in him, yet hee and his flesh are diuorced a sunder. This diuorcement is [Page 268] made, when a man beginnes to dislike and to hate his flesh, and the euill fruites of it: this separation beeing made, they are no Rom. 7. 17 Rom. 8. 1. more one, but twaine, and the one hath no­thing to doo with the other. In this case though the flesh beget sin and perish there­fore, yet the Christian man shall not incu [...] damnation for it, To come more neere the matter; you saie the fleshe begettes in you wauerings, doubtinges, and distrustinges▪ what then? it troubleth you: but feare not, remember your estate; you are diuorced from the flesh, and you are newe married vnto Christ: if these sinnes be laide at you [...] doore, accompt them not as your children▪ but renounce them as Bastards, saie with Paul, I doubt indeede, but I hate my doub­tings, and I am no cause of these, but the the flesh in mee which shall perish when I shall be saued by Christ.

This which you haue saide doeth in part content mee: one thing more I praie you shewe mee concerning this point: namelie how I maie be able to ouer­come these doubtings.

For the suppressing of doubtings, you are to vse three meditations.

The first, that it is Gods commandement 1. Ioh▪ 3. 23. [Page 269] that you should beleeue in Christ: So saint Iohn saith, This is his commandement that wee beleue in the name of his sonne Iesus Christ. Thou Ioh. 3. 16. shalt not steale, is Gods commandement, & you are loth to breake it, least you should displease God and pull his curse vpon your head. This also is Gods commandement, Thou shalt beleeue in Christ, and therefore you must take heede of the breach of it: [...]east by doubting and wauering you bring [...]he curse vpon you. Secondlie, you must [...]onsider that the promises of saluation in Christ are generall, or at the least indefinite [...]xcluding no particular man: as in one for [...]ll maie appeare. God so loued the worlde that [...]e gaue his onely begotten sonne, that whosoeuer [...]eleeueth in him should not perish but haue euerla­ [...]ing life. Nowe then so often as you shall [...]oubt of Gods mercie whereas hee exclu­ [...]eth you not: And as when a Prince giues [...] pardon to all theeues, euerie one can ap­ [...]lie the same vnto himselfe, though his [...]ame bee not set downe in the pardon: So [...]e king of kings hath giuen a generall par­ [...]on for free remission of sinnes to them that [...]ill receiue it. Beleeue therefore that God [...] true in his promise, doubt not of your [...]wne saluation, chalenge the pardon to [Page 270] your selfe. In deede your name is not set downe, or written in the promise of grace, yet let not anie illusion of Sathan, or the consideration of your owne vnworthinesse exclude you from this generall & free▪mer­cie of God: which hee also hath offered to you particularlie, first in Baptisme, then af­ter in the Lords supper: and therefore you are not to wauer in the applying of it to your selfe. Thirdlie you are to consider that by doubting and dispairing you offend god as much almost as by anie other sinne. Yo [...] do not aboue hope beleeue vnder hope as you shoul [...] doo.

Secondlie you robb God of his glorie, is that you make his infinite mercie to bee Rom. 4. 18. lesse then your sinnes. Thirdlie you make him a lier who hath made such a promisse vnto you. And to these three medita­tions adde this practise. When your Ro. 10. 12. hart is toiled with vnbeliefe and doubtings, then in all hast drawe your selfe into some secrete place, humble your selfe before God powre out your hart before him: desire hi [...] of his endles mercie to worke faith, and t [...] suppresse your vnbeliefe, and you shall see That the Lord ouer all is rich vnto all that call v­pon his name.

The Lord reward you for your kindnes: I will hereafter doo my endeuour to practise this your counsell. Nowe I will make bold to shew another that makes me to feare least I haue no faith. And it is, because I doe not feele the assurance of the forgiuenesse of my sinnes.

Faith standeth not in the fee­ling Heb. 11. 1. Rom. 8. 23. of Gods mercie, but in the apprehen­ding of it, which apprehending maie bee when there is no feeling, for faith is of in­uisible things, and when a man once com­meth to enioy the thing beleeued, then hee ceaseth to beleeue. And this appeareth in Iobs example, when he saith, Lo though hee sleie me, yet will I trust in him, & I will reprooue my waies in his sight: he shalbe my saluation also: for Iob. 13. 15. 16. the hypocrite shal not come before him, hee decla­reth his faith: yet when he saith presentlie afterwarde, Wherefore hidest thou thy face, and takest me for thine enimie? hee declareth the want of that feeling which you speake off.

Yet euerie true beleeuer feeles the assurance of faith: otherwise Paul would not haue said, Proue your selues whether you are in the faith or not.

Indeed sometimes he doth, but at some other times he doth not: as namely [Page 372] at that same time when God first calleth him: and in the time of temptation.

What a case am I in then? I ne­uer felt this assurance: onelie this I feele that I am a most rebellious wretch aboun­ding euen with a whole sea of iniquities: me thinkes I am more vglie in the sight of God, then anie toade can be in my sight. O then what shall I doo? Let mee heare some worde of comfort from thy mouth thou man of God.

Tell me one thing plainly, you say you feele no assurance of Gods mercie?

No in deede.

But do you desire with all your hart to feele it?

I doo indeed.

Then doubt not, you shal feele it.

O blessed be the Lord, if this be true.

Why, it is most true. For the Wish and haue. man that would haue anie grace of God ten­ding to saluation, if hee do truelie desire it, hee shall haue it: for so Christ hath promi­sed, I will giue to him that is a thirst of the well of the water of life freely. Whereby I gather Reu. 2. 6. that if any wante the water of life, hauing [Page 273] an appetite after it, he shall haue inough of it: And therefore feare you not, onely vse the meanes which God hath appointed to attaine faith by, as earnest prayer, reuerent hearing of Gods worde, and receiuing of the Sacraments: and then you shall see this thing verifyed in your selfe.

All this which you saie I finde in my selfe by the mercie of God: my harte longeth after that grace of God which I want. I know I doe hunger after the king­dome of heauen & the righteousnes there­of: and further though I want the feeling of Gods mercie: yet I can pray for it, from the verie roote of my heart.

Bee carefull to giue honour to god for that you haue receiued already. For these thing are the motions of the spirite of Phil. 1. 6. God dwelling in you. And I am perswaded of this same thing, that God which hath begon this good worke in you will perfect the same vnto the day of Iesus Christ.

The third thing that troubles me, is this. I haue long prayed for manie graces of God, and yet I haue not receiued them, whereby it comes oft to my minde, that God loues me not: that I am none of his child: & therefore that I haue no faith.

You are in no other case then Dauid himselfe, who made the same com­plaint: I am wearie of crying, my throate is dri [...] ▪ Psal. 69. 4. mine eies faile, whiles I waite for my God.

But Dauid neuer praied so ma­nie yeares without receiuing an answere as I haue done.

Good Zacharie waited longer on the Lord, before he granted his request, then euer you did, Its like hee praied for a child in his yonger yeres, yet his praier was not heard before he was old. And further Luk. 1. 7. 13 you must note, that the Lord may heare the praiers of his seruants, and yet they bee al­together ignorant of it: For the manner that God vseth in graunting their requests is not alwaies knowen: as maie appeare in the example of our Sauiour Christ. Who in the daies of his flesh, did offer vp praiers and sup­plications with strong crying and teares, vnto him Heb. 5. 7. that was able to saue him from death, and was al­so heard in that which he feared. And yet wee knowe hee was not freed from that cursed death, but must needes suffer it. How then was he heard? On this manner; hee was strengthened to beare the death: he had an Angell to comfort him, hee was afterward freed from the sorrowes of death. And so [Page 275] it is with the rest of Christes bodie, as it was with the head. Some being in want pray for temporall blessings: God keepes them in this want, and yet hee heares their praiers, in giuing them patience and strength to a­bide that want. Some being in wealth and aboundance praie for the continuing of it, if it be the will of God. The Lorde dinges them into a perpetuall miserie, and yet hee heares their praiers, by giuing thē blessed­nesse in the life to come. You praie for the encrease of faith and repentance, and such like graces: you feele no increase after long praier: yet the mercifull God hath no doubt heard your praier, in that by delaying to performe your request, he hath stirred vp in you the spirite of praier, hee hath humbled you and made you feele your owne wants, the better to depend on his mercie, for the beginning and encreasing of euerie spiritu­all grace.

The fourth thing that trou­bles me, is that I cannot feele faith purifie my heart, and to worke by loue in bringing foorth liuelie fruits.

If this bee so continuallie, that faith bring forth fruit, it is verie dangerous and argueth a plaine want of faith, yet for [Page 276] a certaine time it maie be so, Faith hath not onelie a spring time and a sommer season, but also a winter when it beareth no fruit. And Cant. 2. 11 there is manie a true Christian like the bru­sed reede, that is ouerturned with euerie blast Esay 42. 2. of wind: and like the flaxe that hath fire in it, which by reason of weakenes, giue nei­ther heate nor light, but onelie a smoke.

Thus much shall suffice for my first temptation, wherein I take my selfe sa­tisfied, nowe if you please, I will bee glad to rehearse the second.

I am content, let vs heare it.

I am afraide least I haue not truelie repented, and therefore that all my profession is onelie in hypocrisie.

What mooueth you to thinke so.

Two causes especiallie, the first is, they which repent, leaue off to sinne: But I am miserable sinner, I am laden with great burdens of sinne, I doo continuallie displease God by my euill thoughts, words and deeds.

You need not feare, Ro. 5. 20. For where sinne aboundeth (that is the knowledge and feeling of sinne) there grace aboundeth much more.

I finde not this in my selfe.

But yet you finde thus much in your selfe: those corruptions which you feele, and those sinnes that you commit, you hate thē, you are displeased with your selfe for them, and you endeuour your selfe to leaue them.

Yea that I doo with all my heart.

Then howe miserable so euer you feele your selfe by reason of the mas [...]e of your sinne: yet you are not subiecte to Rom. 8. 5. cum 8. 1. condemnation, but shall most certainely escape the same. Take this for a most certaine truth, ‘that the man that hates & dislikes his sins, both before and after hee hath done them, shall neuer be damned for them.’

I am euen hart sicke of my ma­nifolde sinnes and infirmities, & these good words which you speak are as flagons of wine, Cant. 2. 5. to refresh my wearie, laden, and weltting soule. I haue begunne to flee sinne, and to detest it long agoe. I haue beene oft diplea­sed with mine infirmities and corruptions: when I offende God, my heart is greeued, I desire to leaue sinne, I flee the occasions of sinne: I woulde faine fashion my life to Gods word: and I praie vnto God that he [Page 278] woulde giue mee grace so to doo: and yet (which is the griefe) by the strength of the flesh, by the sleights and power of Sathan I am often ouertaken and fall maruellouslie, both by speach and by deed.

Haue courage my good bro­ther, for whereas you haue an affection to doo the thinges that are acceptable vnto God, it argueth plainely that you are a mē ­ber of Christ: according to that of Paul. Rom. 8. 5. They which are of the spirite, fauour the things of the spirite. Well then if Sathan euer obiect anie of your sinnes to your, make aunswere thus, that you haue forsaken the first hus­bande the fleshe, and haue espoused your selfe to Christ Iesus, who as your head and husbande hath taken vpon him to answere your debts, and therefore if he vrge you for them, referre him ouer vnto Christ. For there is no sute in lawe against the wife the husbande liuing: yea I adde further, if you bee ouer caried with Sathans temptations, and so fall into anie sinne, you shall not answere for it but Sathan, it shall surely be rekoned on his score at the daie of iudgmēt for he was the author of it: if you fal by the frailtie of your flesh, it shal perish therefore: but you shal stil haue Christ you aduocate.

Indeede as you saie I haue in me an affection to please God, but when I come to performe my obedience, there I faile.

Therefore marke this further. As long as the children of God are in this life, Gen. 22. 12▪ Malac. 3. 17. God regardeth more the affection to obeie, then the obedience it selfe: And they shall bee vnto mee saith the Lorde of hostes, in that daie that I shall doe this, for a flocke, and I wil spare them, as a man spares his owne sonne that serueth him. The Father when he shall set his childe to doe anie busines, though he doe it neuer so vntowardlie, yet if he shew his good will to doe the best hee can, his father will bee pleased: and so it is with the Lorde towarde his children you looke to haue some perfe­ction in your selfe; but in this life you shall receiue no Rom. 8. 23. more but the first fruits of the spirite, which are but as a handfull of corne, in respect of the whole corne fielde; and as for the accomplishment of your redempti­on, you must wait for it til after this life: you would bee kissed with the kisses of Christs mouth, but here in this world you must bee content, if you maie with Marie Magdalen kisse his feete. For the perfection of a Chri­stian mans life, standes in the feeling and [Page 280] confessing of his imperfections. And as Ambrose. Ambrose saith, obedience due to God, stands more Affectu magis quā effectu. in the affection then in the worke.

But why will God haue those whom he hath sanctified labour still vnder their infirmities?

The causes are diuers. First, hereby hee teacheth his seruaunts, to see in what great neede they stand of the righte­ousnes of Christ, that they maie more care­fullie seeke after it. Secondlie, he subdueth the pride of mens hearts, & humbleth them by counteruailing the graces which they haue receiued, with the like measure of in­firmities. Thirdlie, by this meanes the god­lie are exercised in a continuall fight against sinne, and are dailie occupied in purifieng themselues.

But to goe on forward in this matter: there is another cause that makes me feare, lest I haue no true repentance.

What is that?

I often times finde my selfe like a verie timberlog, void of all grace & good­nes, frowarde, and rebellious to anie good worke▪ so that I feare lest Christ haue quite forsaken me.

As it is in the strait seas, the [Page 281] water ebbes and flowes, so is it in the god­lie: in them as long as they liue in this world according to their own feeling, there is an accesse and recesse of the spirit. Other­whiles they bee troubled with deadnes and dulnes of heart, as Dauid was, who praied Psal [...] [...]8. to the Lorde, to quicken him according to his lo­uing kindnes, that he maie keepe the testimonies of his mouth, and in another place he saith, that Gods promises quickened him. Which coulde Psal [...] not be, vnlesse he had beene troubled with great dulnes of heart. Againe, sometimes the spirite of God quite withdraweth it self to their feeling: as it was in Dauid. In the dai [...] Psal. 77▪ [...]3 [...]. 8. of my trouble (saith hee) I sought the Lorde, and my soule refused comfort. I did thinke vpon God & was troubled, I praied and my spirite was full of an­guish. Againe, will the Lord absent himselfe for e­uer? and will he shew no more fauour? hath God for­gotten to be mercifull? &c. The Church in [...]h [...] [...]a [...]. 3. 1. [...] 5. 4. 5 6. Canticles complaineth of this. In my bedd [...] [...] sought him by night whom my soule loued: I sought him, but I found him not. And againe, my welbe­loued put in his hand by the hole of the dore, and [...] heart was affectioned towardes him: I rose [...] pen to my welbeloued, and my hands did [...] myrrhe, my fingers powre myrrhe vppon [...]dles of the bar, I opened to my welbeloued▪ [...] my [Page 282] welbeloued was gone and past, mine heart was gone when hee did speake. I sought him, but I coulde not finde him, I called, but he answered me not. Con­trariwise, God at some other times sheds a­broad Rom. 5. his loue most aboundantlie in the hearts of the faithfull; and Christ lieth betweene tho Cant. 1. 13. breasts of his Church, as a posie of myrrhe giuing a strong smell.

But how can he be a Christi­an that feels no grace nor goodnes in him­selfe.

The child which as yet can vse no reason, is for all that a reasonable crea­ture: and the man in a soune feeles no pow­er of life, and yet he is not dead. The Chri­stian man hath manie quaumes come ouer his heart, and he falles into manie a soune, that none almost would loke for anie more of the life of Christ in him, yet for al that he may be a true Christian. This was the estate of Peter when he denied our sauiour Christ with cursing and banning, his faith onelie Luke 22. 31 fainted for a time, it failed not.

I haue nowe opened vnto you the chiefe things that trouble me: and your comfortable answers haue much refreshed my troubled minde. The God of all mercie, and consolation requite you accordinglie.

I haue spoken that which God out of his holie word hath opened vnto me if you finde anie helpe thereby, giue God the praise therfore, and carrie this with you for euer, that by manie afflictions both in the bo­die Acts. 24. 22 and the mind you must enter into the kingdome of heauen. Rawe flesh is noisome to the sto­macke, and is no good nourishment before it be sodden: and vnmortified men and wo­men Hooper. be no creatures fit for God: and there­fore they are to be soaked and boiled in af­flictions, that the fulsumnes & rancknes of their corruption maie be delaied, and they maie haue in them some rellish acceptable vnto God. And to conclude, for the auoi­ding of all these temptations, vse this sweet praier following which that godlie saint, Maister Bradford made.

Oh Lorde God and deere Father, what shall I saie that feele all thinges to bee (in manner) with me as in the wicked? Blind is my minde, crooked is my will, and peruerse concupiscence is in me, as a spring of stin­king puddle. O howe faint is faith in mee? how little is my loue to thee or thy people? how great is my selfe▪ loue? how hard is my heart? by reason whereof I am mooued to doubt of thy goodnes towards me, whether [Page 384] thou art my mercifull father, and whether I be thy childe or no, indeed worthilie might I doubt, if that the hauing of these were the cause, and not the fruit rather of thy chil­dren. The cause why thou art my father, is thy mercifull goodnes grace and truth in Christ Iesus, which cannot but remaine for euer. In respect whereof thou hast borne mee this good will to bring mee into thy Church by Baptisme and to accept me into the number of thy children, that I might be holie, faithfull, obedient and innocent: and to call me diuers times by the ministerie of thy word into thy kingdome: besides the in­numerable other benefites alwaies hitherto powred vpon me. All which thou hast done of this thy good will which thou of thine owne mercie barest to me in Christ before the world was made. The which thing as thou requirest straitlie that I shoulde be­leeue without doubting, so wouldest thou that I in all my deedes shoulde come vnto thee as to a father, and make my mone without mistrust of being heard in thy good time, as most shall make to my comfort. Lo therefore to thee deere father I come through thy sonne our Lorde, our media­tour, and Aduocate Iesus Christ, who sit­teth [Page 285] on thy right hand making intercession for mee; I praie thee of thy great goodnes and mercie in Christ to be mercifull to mee a sinner, that I maie indeede feele thy sweet mercie as thy childe: the time (oh deere fa­ther) I appoint not, but I praie thee that I maie with hope still expect and looke for thy helpe. I hope that as for a little while thou hast left me, so thou wilt come and vi­site me, & that in thy great mercie, wherof I haue great need by reasō of my great mise­rie. Thou art wont for a little season in thine anger, to hide thy face from them whome thou louest: but surelie (O Redeemer) in eternall mercies thou wilt shewe thy compassions. For when thou leauest vs, Oh Lord, thou doest not leaue vs very long, neither doest thou leaue vs to our losse, but to our lucre and aduantage: euen that thy holie spirite with bigger portion of thy power and vertue maie lighten and cheere vs: that the want of feeling of our sorrowe maie be recompenced plentifullie with the liuelie sent of hauing thee to our eternall ioie: and therefore thou swearest that in thine euerlasting mercie thou wilt haue cō ­passion on vs, Of which thing, to the ende wee might be most assured, thine oath is to [Page 286] be marked, for thou saiest: as I haue sworn, that I will neuer bring anie more the waters to drowne the worlde: so haue I sworne that I will neuer more be angrie with thee, nor reproue thee. The mountaines shall re­mooue, and the hilles shall fall downe, but thy louing kindnes shal not mooue, and the bond of thy peace shall not faile thee: thus saiest thou the Lorde our mercifull Redee­mer. Deere father therefore, I praie thee re­member euen for thine owne truth & mer­cies sake the promise and euerlasting coue­nant, which in thy good time I praie thee to write in my heart, that I maie know thee to bee the onelie true GOD, and Iesus Christ whome thou hast sent: that I maie loue thee with all my heart for euer: that I maie loue thy people for thy sake: that I maie bee holie in thy sight through Christ: that I maie alwaies not onelie striue against sinne, but also ouercome the same dailie more and more as thy children doe: aboue all things desiring the sanctification of thy name, the comming of thy kingdome, the doing of thy will on earth as it is in heauen, &c. through Iesus Christ our Redeemer, Mediatour, and Aduocate, Amen.