I.

WHen I came into the Worlde, Mars entered into my shoulders; Hercules into my right arme; Sampson into my left; Atlas into my legges; Mer­cury into my head; Venus into myne eyes; Cupid into my countenance; Nero into my heart, and Iupiter into all my body. So that by the very aboundance of my power: when I walk I make the earth to tremble, heauen to look fear­full, the winds to cease, the Sea to become calm, women great with childe to deliuer abortiues, men to flye amazedly heere and there. And men of greatest valour, and highest courage, beholding [Page] but my presence, say all with one voyce, Libera nos Domine.

II.

I Sweare by my Sword (Villaine) if I can but see thee, I will giue thee such a blowe with my Bastinado, as by the verie strength thereof, I will strike thee sixe foot down into the earth. And there shall remaine nothing of thee out of the ground, but onely thy right arme and thy heade, reserued for this especiall occasion: to take off thy hat, and do me reuerence, as I shall passe or walk along by thee.

III.

ASsuredly when I consider how highly For­tune hath indued me w ^t graces, I find that I want time to put all those considerations in effectuall imployment. For first, shee hath heaped such strength vpon me, giuen me an immeasurable masse of corage, & builded such a fabricke of extra­ordinary valor in me: that I am as a Colonie in France, a Bastillion in Spaine, a Fortresse in Italy, a Castle in England, a Cittadell in Germany, a To­wer in Poland, a rocke in Armenia, a wall in Den­marke, & generally the hath adorned me aboue all y ^e [Page] men of this worlde. For I am of a most purified & refined kinde of mettle, formed from the choysest grace of the earths entrailes, and meerely engen­dered of Generositie.

IIII.

I Make a Vow to Iupiter, that I am as a Man without sence, & euen halfe desperate, because I cannot instantly meet with any man that is desirous to entreat peace, or take truce with mee. Al my glorie therefore shall bee, to finde out some one, vpon whom I may discharge this choller, & reuenge my spleene, since I cannot preuaile to deale with them that haue occasioned this passion in me, by reason of their cowardly & speedy flight. For this is infallible, I can neuer expresse the height of my manhood, against pouerty in power, or sillie resistance.

XIII.

I Swear by the bones of the Sun, that it is not possible for me to restraine my right arme, from striking one stroke with my Bastinado, but it is death to the endurer: except the Sunne will stay his course in the firmament, and entreat me to be more mercifull.

VI.

I Am vndoubtedly perswaded, that there is not any thing in the world, which is able to equall the horrible, dreadfull, and furious terribility of my courage. For what created creature is there in the world, but yeildeth me honor & obeysance? Such is my awefull and commaunding power, that I make the earth to tremble, the Skies to looke affrighted, the Plannets to stand at gaze, and the rudest windes to bee whist. The Sea shrinkes in her head, and dare not be seene, or stir: the Beasts that haunt the highest Mountaines, and those that liue among the lesser hils, are glad to runne, and hide themselues in their wombes, as in Dennes or caues: nay, that which is more, the Byrds which flye in the ayre, the Fishes that swim in the Sea, and men that are most valiant and couragious, at one very winke or turne of mine eye, they sinke, and so I send them into their Graues or Sepulchres.

VII.

GO, run to my Cooke, commaund him from me, that forthwith he spit and lay downe to the fire, a dozen & a halfe of my great Can­nons [Page] or Ordinance, aud to larde them with infi­nite Trunchions of Speares, Pikes, and Hal­berds, broken by mine owne arme, in so many se­uerall fights, when none in the world (except my selfe) was able to depart thence conquerour. Bid him also to dresse some two or three Dozen of Muskets, and make me a Sallet or two, of Pe­tronilles or Pistolles, strewed about with Bul­lets, instead of Oliues and Capers. Then, let whosoeuer dare, come suppe with mee: for these are the Vyands, whereon I am vsually accusto­med to feede.

VIII.

I Am King of all the Paladines, the terrour of the World, the Flower of Nobility, among all the Rodomants, Rowlands, and Reynards; endued with infinite speciall graces: Goodly, like an An­gell: I haue the heart and courage of Lucifer: I am Seruant to the choysest Ladyes of Beautie, and Prince or Soueraigne of the companie of Amaracoes.

IX.

VPon a certaine day, it was my hap to meete in Battaile the Queen of the Amazons, who [Page] aduancing her arme, was in good hope to haue slaine me with her warlicke Sword. But I (ne­uer admitting the least losse of time) at one blowe smote her downe to the ground, and then catch­ing her by the haire, I threwe her with such vio­lent fury vp into the ayre, that shee neuer stayed, but went on so faxre as the fift heauen: where she fell vpon Mars (who was playing at the Saunt with Venus) and shrewdly brake his heade. Ve­nus being there at not a little affrighted, cryed out for helpe and succour, and at her cry, al the Gods ranne immediately to her: where they were ex­traordinarily amazed, to see Mars lye along in such gastlie manner. But Iupiter putting his heade out at the Windowe, and seeing mee laye such stroakes still on mine Enemies, my corage and choller holding on so furiously, that the Fyre sparckled about the Field, as if it had beene ano­ther Mount Gibell or Aetna: hee forthwith sayde to all the other Goddes: See that you stirre not, neither make any noise, for hee that hath alrea­die slaine Mars; is able and sufficient of himselfe, to kill as many Goddes as remaine aliue, or dare vse any resistance against him.

X.

I Know not what kind of death I shoulde deuise or make choyse of, for the punnishment of two villaines, that eyed me this day in the street af­ter [Page] a base & scuruie maner. I desire to looke ouer mine Index or Repertory, where I haue set down with mine owne hand, seauen hundred, sixty, and fiue seuerall kindes of slaughter, to see which of them may be by me best likt and allowed. For in­deed, those which now adaies I would customa­rily vse, and haue as an extraordinary exercise in my hand: I could wish, that they might be blows without bloud, slashes of the sword, yeilding no purple sluces, but as if my weapons edge were Lead, or the reuerses onely industrious▪ agile, and subtle. For my other kinde of fight, I finde and confesse it to be too dreadful and fatall: because I neuer stab, but it is quite through, the very fall of my Sword makes an huge wide wound; my E­stoccado is ouer dangerous, and the least stroake mortall. Therefore I am oftentimes (in meere mercy) compelled to bestowe some few blowes w ^t my Bastinado; to the end, that I may giue rest to my weapon, and let it reioyce a little in the Scab­barde.

XI.

LOoke to your selues, my Lordes, retire or withdraw a litle out of the way, vntil I haue put on my Cape or Cloake: because the verie winde thereof, is sufficient, to send you suddenlie aboue fiftie leagues hence, beyond the Pyrenean Mountaines.

XII.

IF my Sword could speak, and tell what it dai­ly doth, time were not able to alow it discourse. Who coulde else, more people all the Church­yards in the world, then he hath done? who hath made richer Chirurgions euery where, then hee hath done? Who could, or can make the Armo­rers to haue more toyle and continuall trouble, then he hath done, and daily so endureth? What can cut through more armors of proofe, then it doth? Who more scoffes or scornes the Bucklers of Barcelona, or carues through the curious Hel­mets of Calataynd, then it doth? As for y ^e Casks of Almazen, it cuts through as easily, as if they were all made of Muske-Mellons.

XIII.

IT is now full twenty yeares, since this sword hath bin my feeder and maintainer: For, there­by am I feared of men, and beloued of women.

XIIII.

[Page]IT hath bin told me, that the great Turk com­mits many murders, and that he cuts off mens armes and legs. But by the life of my dead Fa­thers bones, if I go to him, that courage will bee cold, and quickely forsake him. For I shal no soo­ner appeare in his presence, but he must presently strike himselfe dead with his owne hand, for feare least he should fall into mine.

XV.

WIth one word only, I can penetrate and strike downe to hell, and with my verie presence, I am able to subdue the whole world, euen from the East vnto the West, spoy­ling, defacing, and tearing all men & other mat­ters in pieces, that shal dare to oppose themselues in my way. For it is vniuersally knowne what I am: That my Bedsted is built with the ribs of Gyants; the Ticke or Bed it selfe, is stufte with the Monstachios of the chiefe Commanders in the great Turkes Campe, and the Bolsters with the braines, which by verie boxes on the eares, I haue beaten out of his best Captaines heads. My Sheetes are wouen of the fayrest lockes of the Amazones; my Couerings, of the Switzers beards, and my Curtaines of the soft downe of the Eye-Browes of the Hungarians and Germaines: The Walles of my lodging is constructed of diuers partes, not onely of Caskes or Helmes, but of whole [Page] of whole heads enclosed in them, carrying plumes and pendents of the Queene of England, who (be­ing deade) I haue frighted in her Graue with my formidable Bilbo, for terrifieng mee in the terri­ble yeare of eighty eight. The Floore of my house (instead of Playster of Paris) is artificially compounded of Ianissaries Teeth: The Ta­pistrie or Hangings, are Skinnes of Arabes and Sorcerers, flayed off with the verie poynt of my Dagger: And the Tyles or Slates which co­uer my House, are the Nayles of Monarches and Kinges, whose bodies I haue long since (in despight both of them and their Corps du Guard) sent in Slices of a foote long, into their Graues.

XVI.

SCorning (in mine Person) to drawe my drea­ded Sworde, against a single braue English Captayne: I gaue him such a kicke with my foote, that he mounted, and smote his heade a­gainst the Sunne, with such violent strength, that it continued ecclipsed for the space of fifteene dayes together. And then, within a while af­ter, the Captayne went and fell vpon his knees before Iupiter, entreating him to pardon mee my Sinnes, in recompence of the good deede that I had done, that with a spurne of my foote, [Page] I had placed him among the Starres, where­as (contrary-wise) I might haue cast him downe into Hell, among the Wicked and Damned Soules.

XVII.

WIth one hayre of this Moustachio, which I carelessely cast away, I will make such a wide ouverture or breach through thy Bodye, as all the Spanish Infanterie, and the French Caualaery, shall passe along easilie through, without any touch, eyther of the one side or o­ther.

XVIII.

WHat matter were it, if Asia, Europe, Affrica, the Pyrenian Mountaines, and the Alpes were all whelmed one vpon another: seauen Draggons, eight Elephants, tenne Ty­gers, two and twentie Lyons, and sixtie fiue Bulles in fierce opposition? All these for mee to couquer and make peace-able, were a matter of nothing.

XIX.

MIstresse of my heart, command me some ser­uice becomming my vocation; for I swear by the greatest Tooth of Cerberus, to giue desiance (for your sake) to ten men together: and though there should come twice as manie more, yet I stand resolued, not to flye, but to resist them all. Commaund me to kill one, two, three, foure, fifty or sixty persons, to hewe off legges, armes, noses, or the faces of any whosoeuer, as dare pre­sume to equall themselues with you. For such of­fices are easier to be by me performed, then at any time by you they can be commanded.

XX.

WIth this most re-doubted and terrifying Sword, I ruinate, I destroy, and set all thinges on fire: Ouer-throwing whole Armies, breaking downe citties, racing castels, leuelling Trenches, battering walles, and shaking in shi­uers inexpugnable Fortresses. For, at my verye sight or presence, I make Iupiter to run and hide his heade; Mercury flyes like a Schoole-Boy; Cupid quakes and trembles; and Mars he stands in amaze, as if hee were transformed, rendering [Page] ouer his tribute from Venus to me, because she af­fects me, as her much more amorous Seruant.

XXI.

IN what place soeuer I am, Death is alwayes with me, because he gets more profit by me, thē if he were in the middest of the most furious and bloudiest battailes in the whole world. Hee hath bin my continuall companion and follower, in conquest of y ^e kingdoms of the Grimeans, Diceans, Dinameans, Alopitians, Pitunians and Espinomeans. For to speak nothing but the naked truth, with­out him. I had walked alone night & day: because I can find no other more familiar resemblance to my selfe, or one that can be so pleasing to me.

XXII.

I Finde in my selfe the Nature of the Basiliske, and (indeede) something of greater power. For if he with his sight can kill one after one, when I looke vppon men in my spleene and choller, I make them to fall downe by ten and ten, euen as if mine eyes were the Balles of your greatest Ar­tillerie.

XXIII.

I Am too olde to enduce any Trauaile, and yet but young to all valiant and aduenturous suf­ferance: For from the time that I was in my Cradle, Venus made it her daily custome, in stead of Milke to feede me with fire, and for fruite and sweet meats, I swallowed leaden Bullets, and Balles of Brasse.

XXIIII.

LIke as the Worlde is deuided into foure parts, whereof three are Asia, Affrica, and Europe, and these three are circkled or round engirt with the Sea: Euen so is my heart deui­ded into three other parts, which doe containe three seuerall Natures, to wit; affable, terrible, and cruell. Now these three partes are rounde enuironed, yet not with Water, but vvith liuing flames of hot cousuming fire. And as this fyre (in Loues behalfe) is so sweete, as much better for mee were it, if it were sower or bitter, because I cannot captiuate the poyson which is in my heart, enen so in the same manner is my heart it selfe. And yet with three stroakes of this bright brandished blade, the one deliuered slycing, the [Page] second reuersing, and the thirde meerelie poyn­ting: I could kill and ouer-quell all man-kinde, making Riuers of blood longer then Ganges, lar­ger then Poe, and more terrible then Nylus. But let the Worlde bee thankefull for it, that at this instant I am become amorous, or falne in Loue, for in my former fierie and ouer-fierce humour: I vsed to kill dayly (at the least) three or foure do­zen of Men, Women, and Children. But now, in this more milde and temperate alteration, I vse not to kill past a dozen in a day. And what doe you thinke may bee the reason thereof? Let me tell yee for an infallibletrueth, it is nothing else, but the meere loue or Cupidicall affection, wherewith I haue chaunged my furious humor, and prostrated it in demure Deuotion, to the eternall seruice of my daintie and most Diuine Mistris.

XXV.

MY Shoo-makec one Morning pulling on my shooes, I found one of them somewhat too strait in the insteppe, I gaue him such a kicke with my foote against the ground, that the earth immediately opened, and he fell in as farre as Hell. Belzebub, Sathan, Pluto, and Barrabas, Lordes and Princes of those Tenebrous [Page] obscurities, were thereat driuen all into no meane amazement. Great Cerberus cryed and howled most pittifully: Proserpina rent and tore hir haire, shrieking and weeping verie bitterly, because she saw her dark kingdom receiue a glimpse of light. The little Diabolotinos or lesser Spirits, hidde themselues in corners heere and there. Some leapt out of hell, and fled fearefully thence, & since that time, many of them haue houered aloft in the Ayre, and others in nookes and crannies of the earth, tormenting diuers people, as in many pla­ces of the world it is daily noted.

XXVI.

WHat woman dare be so bold or audacious, as not to confesse her selfe most highly in­amored of this strong thigh, this puissant arme, this breast ful of al force and valour; this visage, more goodly then that of Ganimede, or that of Di­do, or the lookes of Absolon? Let me but see that blushlesse huswife, and then bid her abide the fury of my indignation, if she can or dare.

XXVII.

LAdie, you may (by good right) forsake the Name of Madame Beatrix, and entitle your [Page] selfhence forward, Imperatrix or Empresse, Queen, Princesse, Marquesse, Countesse, Dame, and Da­mosil: Seeing these two great Colombs or Pil­lers of Hercules, which do support and sustain the whole world, are soly obliged to your seruice. I could tel ye, that this Castillian body, is filled with the abounding courage of infinite Armies; that this brest and this arme is stronger then the To­wer of Babylon: Especially, when it is assisted by this redoubted Sworde, for the fires sparkeling from it, do penetrate, & surmount in bright splen­dour, the luminous beames of the Sun.

XXVIII.

IF mine infinite couragious valour, could possi­bly be bought with the price of Gold or Siluer, there needed no other trafficke either by Sea or Land, nor shoulde you heare any more speech of Merchants or Merchandize, or of any man that would labour or addict himselfe to followe such a fruitlesse vocation. Because all men woulde pro­cure to imploy their industry, to get the strength but of one of mine armes, of a legge, of a finger, of my nailes pairing, of an haire frō mine eie-brow, or the very smallest from my head or beard, which onely might suffice to make them valiant, & (then valour) what can be of greater price or estimati­on? But it is my ioy and comfort, that it cannot be compassed, and I am the rather therwith con­tented, [Page] in regard of the peace and quiet of al those Kings, Monarks, and Princes, that hold frend­ship with me▪

XXIX.

MY Maquerella, that old bawd Fortune gaue me her word, that I should enioy the Lady, of whom I am so highly amorous. But if she keepe not promise with mee, I sweare by the hornes of Pluto, by the Beard of Mars, by y ^e lawes of Sampson, and by the Alchoran of Mahomet, that I will take from her all her trickes, and bereaue her of her inconstant and variable wheele. As for her body, with one Estoccado, I will hurle her to Valladolid, bruised and broken into so manie pee­ces or small fragments, that she shall no sooner be falne downe there, but she shall be squandered into dust & power, which I wil make vse of, to cast vpon those letters, that by me shall bee daily sent to my sweet Mistris.

XXX.

I Haue more augmented & increased in the com­passe of two poore daies only, the Stigian King­dom of grim-faced Pluto, & peopled his darke & smoaky Hal with subiects, then either Rodomont, [Page] Orlando, Reynard of Moutauban, Mandricard, or Ra­damanth, with all their powers could doo, and I haue dreadfully subiected, & humbled vpon theyr knees, in a thousand thousand other places, harts that were dauntlesse, most valiant, & of vnmatch­able courage. If you require any witnesse or testi­mony heerof, send to all the inhabited Countries of the East, West, North and South, and peru­sing their Chronicles, do but note w [...]at you finde written in them all, of my vertue and valour.

XXXI.

THe great Turk is more affraid of my valiant resolution, which this vnconquereable Arme hath dearly made known vnto him, then of ten ar­mies or main battalions ioynd together. Because I being one day in y ^e war of the Venetians, against the fore-named great Turk, I gaue such a box on the eare to Abenhamet, great maister of his Camp, y ^t I smote his heade quite from his shoulders: & presently, with another spurn, I kickt it into Con­stantinople, where it deliuered the tidings of the foil and losse of all the army. But when the Graunde Signeur himselfe, & al the rest there present w ^t him, beheld the head without a body, they fled foorth­with into their houses, making their doores very fast vpon them, & continued in such feare, as in 6. years after they durst not peep abroad, through y ^e bread they stood in of me: til at length, I putting [Page] on an humor of more milde temper, and falling into my woonted magnificence, gaue them free leaue to enioy their liberty, and to walk about the streets, as in former times they had done.

XXXII.

WHen I walke along through the streetes of the Citty, a thousand Ladies present thēselues before me. One puls me by the Cloake, another winkes with her eye at me, ano­ther prayes me to sup with her, another offers me presents, another kisses my hand, and blesseth the Mother that bare me, accounting her selfe to bee most happy if she could compasse but one Nights lodging with me: To no other end, but onely to haue a childe sprung from the race of so great and valiant a personage, as the world well knoweth me to be.

XXXIII.

IF the strength of my members could bee impar­ted among disordered persons, and mutinous spirits; the world would be in an vprore, reuolt, and confusion, and nothing else were to bee seene therein, but onely battailes and conquests. The bels would ring night and day, as deliuering the [Page] interment of slaughtered bodies: Surgions could neuer come foorth of their houses, for stit­ching vp slashes of swordes, healing Estoccadoes, setting in right shape broken armes and legges. Women would weepe for the death of their Hus­bands, young children for the losse of theyr Fa­thers, and Maids for great wrong done to their Mayden-heads, hauing lost their Louers, and in danger to die Ʋirgins.

XXXIIII.

IT is I onely that neuer felt feare, but haue me­naced the Skies, the Ayre, Earth, and Water, yea Iupiter and Hel. I could wish to warre with all the Elements: for I fear no tempests, storms, thunder or lightning. And I doubt not, but in ve­ry short time, to make my selfe Lorde of the Sea, Earth, and Hell: I will do it, and I can do it, for my forces are sufficient to performe it.

XXXV.

IF I come to thee, I will giue thee such a spurne with my foot, that it shall raise and mount thee so high, as if thou wert prouided with ten Cart load of Bread, yet shouldst thou stand more in fear of famishing, then of bruising or death, when thou fallest downe againe.

XXXVI.

OH, how I smile to my self, when I cal to mind the ignorance of the Gods, in deyfying Her­cules, and giuing him a name of equall excellencie with them, calling him a God: onely because hee kild the Hydra, took the Bull by the hornes, rent the Dragon in pieces, vanquished the Lyon, sur­mounted the Centaure, and the wilde Beare: be­cause hee made the Harpies fearefully flye away, slew Cethes and Achelous, foyled Diomed King of Thrace, and ouercame Gereonea Qu. of the Ama­zons: fiinally, because he erected Collombs or pil­lers in many places. In effect, al these things are nothing else but a meere fable, and actions of a young womanish spirit, being compared with my vnparaleld strength, fortitude, and courage. For neither the puissance of Daryus, King of the Persi­ans, nor yet of that Alexander, entituled, styled, or epittethized, the Great; nor the strong Sampson, nor mighty Hector the Troyan, nor the valiaunt Achilles, nor the mad and furious Rowland, ycle­ped (by some) Orlando Furioso, nor the aduentu­rous Gridasso, nor the gallant Sacrapant, nor the terrible Mexican Mandricarde, nor the famous Rugiero, or French Roger, nor the horrible Agrica­no, or the robust Rodomont: No, not any one of them, or all assembled together, coulde or are able to equall my terrible, horrible, formi­dable, [Page] fury-bond, and dreadfull force, if I please to let it appeare in my thundering humor.

XXXVII.

MIne arme quakes & trembles, at that which I am determined to doe for my Lady & Mi­stris: For continually I ponder how and which way to compasse her contentment, and yet I ne­uer attaine vnto it. All the night long I dreame that I am performing deedes of Armes (for her sake against tenne men, sixe whereof, I slew out­right, and of them which fled away, he that esca­ped with best safety and security, was gladde to leaue his left arme at my feete. But then (O you Sacred powers) how much more am I able to do in the day time, when I am awake, and at my martial exercise? Twenty men togither dare not touch the string of my Shoo.

XXXVIII.

ONe day as I was playing at the Balloune, I smote it with such force, that it flew vp into y ^e third heauen, where it mounted and leapt vp be­fore the Goddes, who were then assembled in a verie serious Counsell. They looking earnestly one vpon another, becam so confounded, y ^t they sat [Page] wide gaping, and had not the power to speak one word, vntill at length their sences being restored, they thought it necessary that Iupiter shoulde des­cend to earth, and falling on his knees before me, forsaking both his Crowne and Scepter, should humbly offer himselfe to my seruice, Venus to bee my Shee-seruant, Mars my Lacky, and Mercurie mine Apple-Squire.

XXXIX.

AS I was one day playing with the destinies, in the presence of Time, Fortune, and Na­ture, vpon a difficult happening betweene vs, I was suddenly inforced to draw my sword: Time, Fortune, and Nature, being deare friends to the Destinies, stept betweene vs to take vp the mat­ter, and make peace. But I being a Spaniard, set my right foote formost, and gaue therewith such a spurne to Time, that I cast him betweene heauen and earth, and there hee hangs still houe­ring to this instant. Fortune, I sliced hir in twain iust at her girdle, and threwe the one halfe of her there where the Sunne riseth, and the other part where he takes vp his lodging. As for Nature, with my punto reuersso, I gaue her such a deepe & incurable wound, as neither Physitian, Chirur­gion, Barber, nor Apothecary, coulde euer since vndertake to heale it, but euery month in the year that wound breakes forth a bleeding.

XL.

I Had vpon a time a quarrel with a French Gen­tleman, who with despightfull words, bad me draw my sword: which I refused to do, because I perceiued the French-man to looke pale, and to be of a very chil-cold complerion. Wherefore, in meere pitty to warme his blood, and set him in an heat, I suffered him to haue some fifty Estocca­does at mee, and as many other violent blowes: yet could he not draw blood, or had the power to hurt me. But for my selfe, I knew my choller and courage to be such, as with the very least sillip of my finger, I could haue beaten out his braines, and made him sinke to hell.

XLI.

BEing desirous, that Pluto should pay mee such ordinary tribute, as other Kings daily did and do: I tooke my iourny to hell, where I found Plu­to walking at his pleasure, accompanied with fiue hundred and forty fiue Millions, & thirteene hundred ninety and six thousand Legions of De­uils, that vsually attended vpon him. So soone as he beheld me a far off, comming towards him, he came directly to meet me and yeild himselfe as [Page] my prisoner. But I laid hand vpon my Sword, and Pluto perceiuing me to be offended, & in chol­ler, knowing (withall) that I was a Spaniard, fled backe into the deepest partes of hell, with all his traine frightfully following him, & there made fast the gates against me. But I being come thi­ther for better obedience, marched on gallantly step by step, as those of my nation are wont to do: and with a very sneezing of my nose, I made the gates flye open, and I entred. In a moment, I took there for my prisoners, great Sathan him­selfe, the Prince Pluto, and the faire Proserpina; all whose hands I bounde fast together with a hayre of my Moustachios or beard. Neuerthelesse, beholding their incessant teares and lamentati­ons, made with such out-cries and wringing of hands: I vsed the mercy and magnificencie of a Spaniard, deliuered them out of their seruile bands▪ and so suffered them to enioy their former liberty.

XLVII.

I Wil kil this Villain, his Wife, his Children, his Seruants, his Dogs, his Cats, his Pullaine, his very Lice, Nits & Fleas, or any liuing crea­ture belonging to his house, which also I wil rui­nyte from the top to the foundation: though Pluto himselfe, and al the Deuils that are in hel, had so­lemnly vowed to saue them from my furie: And [Page] what is my chiefest purpose heerein? Only to con­stitute such a dread and terror of me, in the hearts of men, as no one (be he neuer so bold or couragi­ous) shal at any time heereafter dare to offend me.

XLIII.

IT was my chance (one day) to bee walking a­broad, somewhat necre to the Trenches which were made at Oastend; when suddenly a Bullet, being sent from a piece of great Ordinance, fel in­to my mouth, shook two of my formost teeth, with­out any iniury or offence vnto mee. At the instant houre, I grew to be somwhat incensed with chol­ler, and the Bullet I took into my hand, & casting or returning it against the enemy, it happened to hit against a Tower in the wall, which immedi­ately in an instant was driuen into smail dust, and slew with the very fall thereof, about 1555. gal­lant Souldiors, who (by especiall appointment) were placed there as a Corps du Guard, & had the charge both of the Tower and wall.

XLIIII.

VPon a time, I would take a walke into Hell, where I found Pluto, Proserpina, & Death, all fitting at [Page] a Table. They were in such a fearefull asto­nishment, beholding me in their darkesome dwel­ling, that I (wel knowing their weaknes of cou­rage) without any further delay, leaping vp with a Caper after the French fashion, with the verye crowne of my Hat or Beauer, broake the roofe of hell; and mounting forth at that breach, the meere noise of my departure thence, was such, that it made the great Citty of Lisbone to tremble, and ouerturned 88 [...]. houses, in the street of Boanistre.

XLV.

BE not you offended, Mistris and Ladie of my life, neither let it seeme displeasing to you, that I am sought after, and beloued by so many Brin­cesses & Paragons; who but wrong themselues therein, and meerely loose their labor in vain. For I beare affection to no other, but only to your self my sweetest mistris: because you are indued with beauty farre beyond Diana, with good graces and behauiour, excelling Pallas, and with sweet affabi­lity more supreme, then Venus. Al these three So­ueraigne Goddesses equall not you, to whome I haue freely giuen my hart, & properly chosen you as mine owne. Consider then that I loue you, and forsake not me for any other, in regard that I am more then a Gentleman. Wherefore, if you marry with me, A sweare by the faith of a Captaine, and by the life of the King my Father (for I neuer [Page] heard him called by any other name) to beget yee the first night such a regiment of Souldiours, as shall conquer all the world in a moment.

XLVI.

MY selfe, Hercules, Death, & Loue, met all by chance on a day together, in a place which was appointed for Archery, and each of vs had his Bow and Arrowes there ready. Wee fell to this acord among our selues, that he who with his Arrow coulde make the greatest slaughter or execution, should beare away the amplest recom­pence of Honor. Hercules beganne first, and with his Arrow, he slew all the Panthers, Lyons Ti­gers, Beares, Wolues: al sauage Beasts, Deere, Elephants, Camels, and Buls. Next, Loue took his shaft, and drawing it to the head, he caused al the Gods, Gyants, Amazons, Men and Deuils; to fal and submit themselues vnder his amorous yoke (my selfe onely excepted, on whome Loue could not attaine to any power.) Death being re­solued to let loose his Areow, he killed therewith all the creatures that were vpon the earth. Wher­upon, I grew into some displeasure against thē, & beeing moued in a moity of choller, to be reuen­ged on them; I crost mine Arrow in my Bow, de­termining to let it be my very last shoot, to auoyd all further quarrell and contention, but no sooner flew mine Arrow from me (being let loose indeed [Page] with extraordinary spirit and courage) but in the very instant, I slew therewith, Hercules, Loue, and Death, and so remained the sole Conqueror.

XLVII.

I Kisse the shoo-sole of your Lady-ship, sole Mi­stris of my heart; Princesse of this breastes po­wer, Dutchesse of this armes dexterity, Mar­quesse of my matchlesse courage, Countesse of my valors capricious conceits, Queene of my forces Quintessence, and absolute Gouernesse of me and my person.

I am constrained to spit daily on the poynt of my sword, for feare it should passe fatally on any person in your presence, or where your vertue may command my demonorance. This Epitaph is engrauen vpon his Tombe, whom I last slewe, for not being bare before you.

XLVIII.